thecoollifeguard - Friendly neighborhood lifeguard
Friendly neighborhood lifeguard

Used to do Lifeguard stuff, now I simply vibe. 24 YO, She/her preferred, but I don’t mind They/Them, Bi Pride

96 posts

Yall The Jonas Brothers Are Gonna Reunite Because They Know The World Needs A Boy Band To Love While

thecoollifeguard - Friendly neighborhood lifeguard

Y’all the Jonas Brothers are gonna reunite because they know the world needs a boy band to love while One Direction is on a break.

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More Posts from Thecoollifeguard

7 years ago

Real quick, are you in the Navy or any other for of Military right now? Have you ever been?

And did you know that not everyone on welfare is trying to suck money out of the Govt? (Is that a shocker? Cause I feel like that’s a shocker to you) And that kids brought over to the US actually have no say in whether they are brought with their families or not? They are KIDS who want to be with their parents, who want to give them a better life than the one they had in a previous country. Would you know what that’s like? Are you a child of an illegal immigrant? Are you in a position, at least somewhat similar to this, where you actually don’t make enough money to support your household?

And please don’t give me that B.S about ‘well they should just get a better job!’ Cause it’s not that simple. There are single parents out there working three or more jobs to support their household, who STILL can’t make enough to pay the bills. Quitting one and trying to find a better paying one? That’s fucking hard. And you might not even find a better paying job, that doesn’t require a degree in something.

‘Well go back to school!’ College cost a lot of fucking money that these parents might not have, and a lot of time they certainly don’t have if they do happen to be working more than a few jobs at a time.

Have you forgotten what America was supposed to be for immigrants? ‘Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.’ Remember that shit? It’s on the Statue of Liberty. You know, that thing that thousands of immigrants saw when they first came to the U.S back in the day?

And you know how Italians were called WOP’s? That means ‘WithOutPapers’. You know what that means? Oh yes. Italians, white people, were illegal immigrants at one point.

You do know illegal immigrants have been here for centuries, right? Like, technically the illegal immigrants are everyone except the Native Americans? (Hence the ‘Native’?) But I digress.

Does your father know he’s raising a heartless asshole?

And if being progressive and understanding of unique situations (a ‘Lefty’ as you so eloquently put it) makes me a clown, then boy, I’m-

Real Quick, Are You In The Navy Or Any Other For Of Military Right Now? Have You Ever Been?

Hey, real fuckin quick:

My dad is in the military, Navy to be specific. He is out at sea right now. He and my mom had been messaging back and forth for a while, so when she asked if he was coming home (jokingly) he said, even if they were turning the ship around, the tugboats would have to pull them into dock.

But the thing is, he’s supposed to be coming home soon in the first place, before Trumps shit show.

The Tugboat workers are federal employees, who, because of the government shit down( my phone auto corrected from ‘shut’ to ‘shit’, but I saw no real difference, so we’re keeping it.) aren’t working. But my point is, someone else’s mom or dad in the Navy/Military can’t come home right now because the federal workers aren’t there. And damnit, I miss my dad, and I’m sure there are plenty of kids and teens who miss their parents too.

So if Trump doesn’t get his shit together and take control of his fucking party, bitch, imma go to DC myself and fuck some shit up. Because if the tugboats aren’t being operated, he and the crew will have to sit somewhere in the water off shore, and wait for who-knows-how-long. And just for a heads up to anyone who didn’t know, regular military workers like my dad, aren’t getting paid till this is over.

And honestly, it’s fucking despicable how CHIP and DACA (two amazing, life saving programs) are being held hostage by Mich McCoward and the other republican representatives. Fuck them. Honestly. They could have funded either of those at any given time, but they didn’t because they want to hold a part of the American population hostage unless their wishes to deport Mexican-American citizens are met.

I really fucking hate the American political system right now. And I don’t see why any reasonable person would approve of anything the Republicans are trying to pull right now.


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7 years ago

Y’all ain’t ever hear of BTS? You know, won top social artist at the BBMA’s? Performed live at the AMA’s, Jimmy Kimmel, The Late Late Show with James Corden, Ellen? Only the top current boy band right now? All sing and rap about having self worth and succeeding in life? Are partnered with UNICEF in the Love Yourself campaign?

Not to say Jonas Brothers aren’t cool, but if y’all want a current boy band, BTS has been around since 2013, and they’re still going strong.

Y’all the Jonas Brothers are gonna reunite because they know the world needs a boy band to love while One Direction is on a break.


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7 years ago

Not really a lifeguard thing, but a recent experience of mine.

Literally nothing is more painful than losing interest in something you used to be so passionate about.


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7 years ago

Weather: 70 degrees, windy, rainy, thunder and lightning is happening

Me: (calls manager of pool) Hey, so there’s no one coming to the pool today because of the thunder and rain, so can we pack up?

Manager: Nah, it might clear up

Weather: *thunnders and does lightning at the exact moment*

Me: Uh, you sure about that? Like there’s a lot of rain-

Manager: Nahhh, it’s gonna clear up in ten. And plus, it’s over 70 degrees, so y’all are staying open.

Me: *giving the ‘bitch what?’ face at the phone* *is wearing a bikini as I am a lifeguard* *is getting very cold*

Me: Okay, guess I’ll just die then.


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7 years ago

Wow. Just went through your profile real quick. Just realized that whole thing was a waste of my time. Talking to you is like talking with a brick wall. You think white people are discriminated against unjustfully, which if you take a look at history, is actually quite justified. White people have, historically speaking, been trash.

But, you know how it goes...-

Wow. Just Went Through Your Profile Real Quick. Just Realized That Whole Thing Was A Waste Of My Time.

So Disney And America are literally two different things... like, we aren’t run by a series of meek mice, blabbering ducks, and dogs-oH mY GoD wAiT! -_-

Anywho, Disneyland has the right to kick you out. It’s literally an amusement park. America, is 1.) not an amusement park, so please don’t treat it like one, and 2.) in the beginning, said, ‘nah fam! Come on over!’ Hence the giant statue saying so. If we didn’t want immigrants coming over and attempting to gain legality, they why don’t we just take the statue down? Cause you gotta commit to your stance, and if you leave it up, then you’re obviously not serious.

And what you just said about Italians, 1.) was not always true, as Adults (during that time would have been considered adults, but the age has since moved up) they were sent over, and 2.) is almost exactly what most parents are having to do with their kids today. So, you kind of just proved my point...?

And do you know Harley historically bruh? Like, in comics and not just as a sex-symbol?

Wow. Just Went Through Your Profile Real Quick. Just Realized That Whole Thing Was A Waste Of My Time.

You think she disapproves of DACA? This girl, right here? ^ the girl who actively fought for women’s rights, (unintentionally, but the writers of her character in comics have made her role quite clear) she didn’t come from a great family, but she managed to get a Psyhology degree, a bisexual woman, and a mother? You think she disapproves of DACA? You think she, who had a child with the Joker, and removed said child from that lifestyle because she didn’t want her to also be in an abusive relationship along with her (like parents of DACA recipients, but with interchangeable dire situations) disapproves of those children growing up in the USA, and being cared for because they didn’t have anyone that could? You think she disapproves of children who didn’t have a choice?

Wow. Just Went Through Your Profile Real Quick. Just Realized That Whole Thing Was A Waste Of My Time.

Oh wait! Do you think she only has value to you because you hold her so close in your fantasies? Because sorry to break it to ya, but fantasies are just that. And I’m not the one defacing Harely Quinn. Guys who only use her as a sexual object are the ones dibarging, defacing and devaluing her.

And no, it is progressive. I’m progressing towards a better future for the U.S, and not throwing a pitty party for those who don’t need it. White guys? Nope they don’t need one. White females? Yeah, sure, they need some help. But not as much as WOC and POC. Children brought here/sent here without much choice? Uh, yeah, they need help right about now! And let’s not forget about the recipients of CHIP either. They’re being put on the line as well.

And hold up. Really? You really think that the Democratic Party is trying to reinstate slavery? Are you fucking kidding me right now? Like, are you for real?

Now that I know just what kind of idiocracy I’m dealing with, I’m just gonna let you go on ahead in your beliefs, cause I obviously can’t change them.

So you can go on ahead and ‘clap back’ if you want. Your mindset is going to take part in the destruction of ‘life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.’

Wow. Just Went Through Your Profile Real Quick. Just Realized That Whole Thing Was A Waste Of My Time.

Hey, real fuckin quick:

My dad is in the military, Navy to be specific. He is out at sea right now. He and my mom had been messaging back and forth for a while, so when she asked if he was coming home (jokingly) he said, even if they were turning the ship around, the tugboats would have to pull them into dock.

But the thing is, he’s supposed to be coming home soon in the first place, before Trumps shit show.

The Tugboat workers are federal employees, who, because of the government shit down( my phone auto corrected from ‘shut’ to ‘shit’, but I saw no real difference, so we’re keeping it.) aren’t working. But my point is, someone else’s mom or dad in the Navy/Military can’t come home right now because the federal workers aren’t there. And damnit, I miss my dad, and I’m sure there are plenty of kids and teens who miss their parents too.

So if Trump doesn’t get his shit together and take control of his fucking party, bitch, imma go to DC myself and fuck some shit up. Because if the tugboats aren’t being operated, he and the crew will have to sit somewhere in the water off shore, and wait for who-knows-how-long. And just for a heads up to anyone who didn’t know, regular military workers like my dad, aren’t getting paid till this is over.

And honestly, it’s fucking despicable how CHIP and DACA (two amazing, life saving programs) are being held hostage by Mich McCoward and the other republican representatives. Fuck them. Honestly. They could have funded either of those at any given time, but they didn’t because they want to hold a part of the American population hostage unless their wishes to deport Mexican-American citizens are met.

I really fucking hate the American political system right now. And I don’t see why any reasonable person would approve of anything the Republicans are trying to pull right now.