HELP IM SO JEALOUS OF THESE CHARACTERS THEYRE NOT EVEN REAL

HELP IM SO JEALOUS OF THESE CHARACTERS THEYRE NOT EVEN REAL

.(not) falling for you - gojo satoru

.pairings gojo satoru x fem!reader

.genre unrequited love [a]

.ongoing | completed

.tw mentions of violence, blood, and death, also contains manga spoilers

.wc; 3.6k

SUMMARY

Satoru was a perfect guy, in every way possible, and had everything he wanted, except you.

Gojou Satoru. The notorious playboy. Well known for his good looks and extraordinary skills. Not only was he blessed with these beautiful looks, he holds the most cursed energy known within the Jujutsu society, and has inherited two of the most powerful techniques known to sorcerer: Limitless, and Infinity. Alongside carrying these techniques, he's become a holder of the Six Eyes after four hundred years.

His immense strength brought envy and admiration from those around him, leaving him to be lucky to be born with such wealth and adoration growing up. All those around him had given him such extreme names, like “The King of Sorcerers”, or the new “God” of jujutsu society, but neither of those names nor the others had fed so much into his complex as much as the one you gave him. “The Strongest.”

The two of you met in high school, having been put together for a mission with his best friends, Getou Suguru and Ieiri Shoko, and immediately clicked, what with your indistinguishable personalities. Everyone thought the both of you were extremely compatible, your personalities fitting perfectly with one another. During the days that you felt sick, he was sick too, on the days he felt like he was over the moon, you were on an emotional equilibrium to him. People said you were telepathically connected, or soulmates, meant to be and whatnot. The two of you were were an ultimate pair, made for one another.

So why didn't you love him? Why did you not feel the same way he did about you? Why did you not get butterflies in your stomach he did so little as breathe? Why was his world turned upside down when you did so much as wave a hello in his direction, but the atmosphere of yours stayed the same, when he would hug you. Was it the fact that he was too tall? Annoying? Similar to you? Or was it that he wasn't Suguru?

Was it the fact that he didn't have the same dark locks as him, or the bland expression he kept on his face at all times, or maybe it was because when he smiled, your heart would do flips. Satoru loved his best friend, truly, he did, but Suguru's existence stopped you from falling for him and conforming to everyone's dreams of the elegant Tsukumo family and the legendary Gojou family conjoining (and possibly even his dreams of marrying you and having a future together.)

He had it all, the money, looks, love, and the skill, but none of it would measure up to anything until you would fall for him. And every day got harder for him as he watched you and Suguru lay in each other's arms after each mission, feeling like you had grabbed his guts and twisted them inside his body, laughing, with Suguru by your side.

So the day that you found out Suguru had massacred the village, and ran away, you fell apart, with Satoru by your side as a pillar. As selfish as it was, he thought it was his only chance to get you to fall for him. He'd visit you every day, checking up on your condition, and brought you whatever you pleased, like a servant to their master.

For years he's pined after you, but not once have you noticed even a crumb of his overwhelming fondness for even the shortest breaths you took, even if you did, it seemed as though you had brushed him off, with an inability to move on from your high school sweetheart that had long gone years before. His patience was wearing thin and he began to get bolder during the times you were together, who wouldn't? After all, he's loved you since the day you met.

Becoming teachers together at Jujutsu Tech had plastered a smile on his face to last a lifetime. To be able to see you every day for several hours, to be able to see you smile around the students, to be able to see you be, well you, would be enough to make him happy. He had practically begged Yaga and Principal Gakuganji to let you teach the first years with him, despite being assigned with the second years and the higher ups.

You were a meticulous colleague, punctual, polite, respectful, and kept a good reputation within the school, gaining acclamation from the students, and other teachers. But despite this calm exterior, you were an enjoyable person to be around, with a bubbly personality and an outgoing demeanour, knowing just what to say in moments of need. You were perfect for him.

With the two of you having a playful relationship, it was easy for him to openly display his affection for you, without you tossing him to the side as if he made you uncomfortable. Nevertheless, you only thought of Satoru as a good friend, and couldn't see anything further happening with him. There were several instances where you had tried to imagine a romantic relationship with him, but it had never felt right. Despite his breathtaking appearance, it could never proportion to the same measurement of flourishing love you carried for Suguru.

Getou Suguru, well known to everyone as the trustworthy best friend of Gojou Satoru, the good ol' sidekick, but to you he was the sun in which you, the earth, orbited around. Everything about him, it all fit like puzzle pieces into your life, he sat snug in the center of your heart like a masterpiece on display. It was well known that you had loved him so dearly, and would risk yourself at the chance of saving him. But it was also known that you could kill for him any chance he asked you to. The days without him began to lead your thoughts to an unfathomable future of dying alone in your bed, with his clothes in your arms as proof of his impact in your life and how he had left it.

The nights felt longer and the days almost became a chore, life became harder to live, with only so much strength alive you could die. Satoru noticed. Your smile would rot away as soon as it existed, crossed off onto the list which recorded the rest of your fake smiles. He noticed how you slowly lost enthusiasm within your passions, and it broke him to do nothing but watch you ruin yourself.

It was all Suguru's fault, everything went wrong because of him. If he had never existed, then maybe it would be him holding you in his arms as you slept through the night, maybe it would've be him whispering sweet nothings as you did your homework in the study hall at lunch, maybe it would've been him that you cried over for almost a decade. But alas, life doesn't bend the way we choose it to. But God, Satoru could never wish for the banishing of his best friend's existence like that, not when he knew that Suguru's disappearance had damaged him too.

He's suffered too, Satoru carried his own weights of grief after Suguru's disappearance. He too, felt as though there was a hole in his heart, an empty void, which no one could fulfill the same way Suguru could. After all, they were best friends. Losing someone precious to you can do more than just a few months of grief. It can mend relationships, break them, form them, or bloom them. So an endeavour on winning your heart and blooming a relationship, Satoru did. Succeed he didn't. You rejected him in a cold manner, much to his dismay, and avoided his presence or the mention of his name for several days.

“No, I just don't see you like that, and I'm still in love with him.” Even the mention of his name would tug at your heartstrings, so the substitute of 'him' was used more comfortably between the two of you.

You shoved past him, going to your next mission, telling him that the two of you were going to be late, wearing an expression he couldn't analyse in the same way he saw the others. And it didn't sit right with him.

“Y/N wait-” he turned around and he was too late, you were already off to your mission, and turning the corner.

The sight was horrific, Kyoto looked as if it was going to fall apart. What kind of curse was this? You stared in fear, afraid of what you'd find if you ventured further into the city, on your way to look for Nobara, Megumi and Yuuji. before taking another step forward, a familiar warmth wrapped around your wrist and you turn around, facing Satoru.

“Hey uh, I know these past few days have been a little weird, but you're still one of my bestest friends, I just want you to be safe out there, okay? Please?” His eyes trembling as his lips mustered up a smile in, hopes of reassuring you.

“I know Satoru, and thank you, I will be safe. how about after this we go get some drinks, this is gonna be a long mission.” You smiled back, bringing a light back into his life.

You trekked through the city, on your way to find the three young students, practically trembling in the case that they may have possibly died. But that couldn't happen, no they were far too strong, with so much potential, especially for their age. As you progressed on your way, the more dilapidated the state of the department store looked, windows shattered, mannequins melted, and fire alarms flashing. There was so much going on, you almost felt dizzy, but the students were a bigger priority and it would be on you if they were dead or missing.

On the other side of the store, Satoru did his own searching, but not for the students, rather the cursed spirit who was roaming free in the building. He worried for your safety, and prayed that it hadn't found you before he could. The scent of smoke and the fumes of the fire wafted around Satoru and a foggy atmosphere built up around him, causing his guard to heighten as well as his senses. He needed to protect everyone. He needed to protect you.

A familar body flew- no, was thrown through one of the shopping windows, and you dashed towards them, noticing the mess of black hair, belonging to the first year, Fushiguro Megumi

“Fushiguro!” You picked up his limp figure, shaking him awake, and horizontally placed your index finger beneath his nostrils, checking for any signs of life, and let out a sigh of relief when the hairs on your fingers were tickled by a warm breath of air.

“Itadori, and Kugisaki, they're hurt-” He sputtered, coughing out blood.

“But so are you, come on, get on my back, I'll find them.” You slung him onto your back, and slowly attempted to stand up as you made your way to find the other teenagers.

Only to be met with an unghastly sight. The cursed spirit was so strong, it could've been mistaken for a special grade. It wasn't. It wasn't even a cursed spirit. it was the love of your life, the man of your dreams, Suguru Getou. You almost let the boy on your back slip off of your arms, before you gently placed him down in a safe area, where he was refrained from further injury.

“SーSuguru?” Your heart skipped, no drove at a speed over a thousand miles an minute. He looked so different, so mature, he didn't look like, Suguru.

“Ah, Y/N dear, hello it's been a while.” He smiled devilishly, and the man before you became unfamiliar, even from the way he held himself up, he seemed like a completely different person, what happened?

“What are you doing here?” you choked up, your eyesight was becomjng blurry, blinded by the tears building up onto your face.

“What do you think? To save Kyoto? Good gracious, no.” His smirk pulled up even further, yet it intimidated you with each passing second. who was this man before you, and what had he done to Suguru?

Your mind flashed back to the memories of going to Tokyo Jujutsu with Satoru, Suguru and Ieiri. And your heart ached with greed, oh, how you begged just to go back in time and re-live those memories, experiencing the same tingly feeling when you learned about being a sorceror, or maybe the palpitations in your heart after you finished a mission, filled with relief, knowing you had survived. And how you wished to stand by Suguru's side again, as you had done so all those years ago.

But you couldn't. And you can't.

You're older now, much more mature, and despite it taking years and years of grief and denial, you had finally learned to detach yourself from the gut wrenching memories you had kept buried in the back of your mind like a sin. You had finally realised everyone grows different as time passes by, and not everything was a constant, so as Suguru stepped closer to your figure, with his cursed energy practically leaking from his aura, you straightened your back and finally got into position.

"I'm going to stop you before you even try to make things worse.” You condensed your energy into your core, feeling your technique build up inside your body as your senses grew and your guard heightened. You had to protect the kids.

“I'd like to see you try, my love.”

Meanwhile Satoru, was still searching the store, unaware of the fact that you had already discovered the "cursed spirit" and the first years. His mind wandered to the most inexplainable places, distracting himself from the possibilities that you may be injured.

"My, my, if it isn't the one and only, Satoru Gojou," his ears perked up, listening to the devious tone behind him; Mahito. “We've been looking for you.”

“We?” A mundane expression carved across his face and his lips brought up to a disgusted chagrin.

"You could at least have a little bit more enthusiasm, goodness, I should've taken the girl." A bitter chuckle taunts Satoru, feeling some sort of tension grow as Mahito brings up the "girl".

"What girl?"

"It's a shame, you know, because I really didn't want to go up against you today, but no, Getou-kun had to get the girl, don't you think he's greedy-" Satory charged himself towards Mahito, finding a method to touch his soul and eventually subdue him, in order to find Suguru.

He was alive? what was he going to do if you found out? Would you go back to him? Where are you right now?

He made haste and explored around the labyrinth of a building, just to find the familiar pink mop of hair, laying tiredly a little further away from a girl with a brown bob cut.

"Yuuji, Nobara!" The relief in his tone was evident, and he crouched down to check on his students, just to see them barely breathing. "Where's Megumi?"

"Sensei, Y/N sensei." Nobara choked out, struggling to form a coherent phrase, and mobilised enough strength to point a finger in the direction she presumed you and Megumi were in. "There's, there's a man, with black long hair, in Jujutsu uniform."

Satoru's heart fell to his stomach. You were reunited, in one of the worst ways possible at that. You probably ran into his arms like a teenage girl again, and he probably reciprocated that action and held you tight in his arms, like he never left.

Oh how he wished he saw that instead.

Upon his arrival, everything was in shambles, even moreso than before. He darted his eyes with vigilance and thought time had stopped.

There you laid, bloodied and battered, almost unidentifiable. You could be labelled dead by default, with your hair disheveled and your face bruised with crimson and mauve. Broken bones were visible on your figure, with your arms shattered and positioned in one of the most uncomfortable poses. And he hated that. His heart burned, and his chest tightened, feeling as if his ribcage had slowly began crushing his organs, hindering his aptness to inhale. Satoru was used to having his breath taken away by you, but never in this lifetime did he expect for Suguru to take your last. But where did he even go?

It was as if his mission was to kill you and take a run for it, but for what reason? The two of you loved, no, yearned for one another's presence and could probably tell the time of the day just by looking into each other's eyes. You were the ones that were connected, soulmates, meant to be, or whatever it was. So did Suguru revoke from his words to love you eternally, just as you had done so all those years ago. Maybe that was why. It was so many years ago.

"Gojou-sensei?" A small croak echoed in the sombre building, and he turned his head around so swiftly, he felt that his neck would break.

"Megumi." He finally helped the boy up, who was still in the same state that you had put him down in, before laying your life down for the one that you loved.

"She's, she's still breathing, I saw her."

That little glint of hope, that short sentence. It was more than sufficient to get Satoru coming your way, to place your slack body upon his thighs. For once, the one and only Satoru Gojou, had cried. He carefully removed the strands of hair covering your face, ever so gently, and looked at your wheezing condition.

"Satoru, I'm so, so, sorry," you whispered out, only because your blood began to ooze on Satoru's uniform, and had nothing but incompetence to try and clean it away with your shattered arms. "I'm getting blood all over you, aren't I?" He nods weakly, with his lips trembling and eyes glistening, which was unknown to your knowledge, as he kept the blindfold on, thinking it could mask his emotions better.

"You're gonna be okay. I know you will, you're Y/N of the Tsukumo family. You guys are invincible!" Hysterical was one word to describe Satoru, but of course it was an understatement, because the first and foremost thing he could focus on, was the fact that you were bleeding out into his arms.

"I'm not you, stop saying that, just hold me for a bit, okay?" A toothy, bloody but toothy, grin displayed upon your face, and a hum of approval emitted from Satoru's lips.

Megumi could do so much as watch, as his teacher was fading away from his current life, and how his caretaker was a trainwreck, watching her slip right through his fingers.

"Satoru," he sniffled one last time before nodding. "Can you take your blindfold off? I want to see your pretty eyes." If you couldn't hear it then, you could hear it now; Satoru's sobs grew decibels louder within each second, and his heart almost cracked inside of his body.

"Yeah." he slips off the black fabric, and meets your eyes with his cerulean ones. Maybe it was the flashing lights in the store that made you crazy, but Satoru had looked exceptionally beautiful today, despite the development that was made.

"...That's good. You look wonderful, Satoru." All of the strength that you had hoarded within yourself, had finally vanished, and your body fell limp in his embrace.

"Y/N? Y/N? Are you there? Hey, you're fine, stop doing that. It's not a good joke, you can do this later, just wake up please." He remained in a mental dysfunction and thought that if he shook you conscious, you would open your eyes from your eternal slumber.

"Sensei, stop. She won't wake up." Megumi whinged as he got closer to the pair. "Get up, we need to find the others, before they get hurt too."

Megumi's words travelled like white noise to Satoru, and he disregarded them completely as he tried to wake up the corpse in his clutches. Something was amiss, you couldn't be dead, he refused it, there was no way you would die by the hands of your own lover. Yet knowing you, it was salient that you would rather to lose your life to someone you loved than to an abhorrent monster that would come to take innocent lives away.

"Please, just let me try and wake her up, I know she's awake, just...please." His words died away after realising the unusual lack of response from you. The roguish expression that masked Satoru's intentions was soon expunged from existence, the very moment he comprehended your passing. "Al-alright Megumi, let's go find the others."

It was impossible to leave you behind, so they didn't. Yuuji and Nobara gasped as Satoru carried your deceased state. Megumi trailed alongside him, helping his two friends up, before telling them to not ask questions so to respect Satoru's wishes of not having to acknowledge your death.

Four people, and one soul had left that building that day, and Satoru had vowed to never step in it as soon at it refurbished. Visits to your grave were frequent, and the headstone was cleaned weekly, so Satoru could read out your name, thinking it would speak you back into existence. nevertheless, you never turned up, only to leave him in an awkward presence with the wind blowing around him and the trees whistling to maybe soothe his excruciating injury.

Gojou Satoru. The notorious playboy. Well known for his good looks and extraordinary skills. Blessed with wealth and happiness all around him. He came into your world as a goofy pole of a man, with the attitude of a sassy child, and you left his as the woman who reached out for his heart, and crushed it with your bare hands.

a/n: i'm so sorry for putting this off for so long i hope this is okay but the ending was kinda rushed ://

mutuals who you think are too cool for you so you periodically check to see if they're still following you. im normal

[23:11] meeting fushiguro toji

warnings infidelity

nothing could ever piss you off more than the sight before your eyes.

"y/n, wait i can expla-"

"eat shit, you asshole."

all of your friends had warned you this guy was bad news, yet you stayed with him anyways. for three years. he had treated you so nicely the first year and a half, but then it just began to die down, and texts were half assed, conversations were short-lived, and even the littlest things like kisses felt so lifeless.

you decided to investigate why he was so distant for the past few months, since your fourth year anniversary was coming up, until you'd caught him with an old family friend who he'd sworn to you he would never interact with, since she was so obsessed with him. on several occasions she'd tried breaking the both of you up, causing so many bits and pieces to be put back together to result in your dull state of a relationship.

leaving the premises, you wandered around aimlessly until you'd found yourself at a café you'd planned to go to with him. just the thought of his existence gutted you, and everything you'd walked through constantly reminded you of him, and there was no other way to rid of his lingering presence in your mind.

before you knew it, you'd sat there until closing time, despite telling yourself you'd only stay for a few minutes. it was then the barista had told you to leave, and with a quick apology you left and walked pointlessly again, to who knows where.

there was something appealing about that bench you'd notice in that old park, and decided to sit there too, since you remembered he would still be at your place and wouldn't have packed his things yet, being the lazy shit he was.

"penny for your thoughts?" a bulky, raven haired man had smiled at you innocently, contrary to his large build. he'd worn a tight black shirt, too thin for this kind of weather, alongside a pair of drawstring white sweatpants, that also seemed unsuitable for the ruthless weather.

scoffing, you ignored the man who looked rather old to be honest, and mumbled, "my thoughts are worth tenfold of your paycheck."

he laughs, and it's quite relieving to hear, his voice isn't booming, nor is it loud and threatening. "i guess i don't need the penny for your thoughts then, i don't have a job."

you're flustered now, and red at the cheeks. you lift the back of your palm against the apple of your cheek to feel the heat arise on your face before sighing and ignoring him again. "shut up, old man."

"hey, old is a stretch, i just turned forty." he defends himself as he leans against the tree that loomed over the bench you sat upon, and you noticed how his features seemed more attractive under the moonlight.

stop. don't get distracted by some hot old guy

"that's what every old person says." chuckling, he leans closer to take a look at your face, and you can't help but burn an embarrassing shade of crimson.

"you look like a child. i bet you're the same age as my son." he teases.

what an asswipe.

"well that depends now, how old is your son?"

"fifteen...i think." he's pondering to himself, and looks down at his feet and shakes off the thought before looking back at you like he hadn't just revised his entire life story.

"you think your son is fifteen...?" what a strange man, firstly he has no job and second, has no idea on the age of his own offspring.

"yeah, he had to stay with some," he pauses, "relatives." maybe you should stop prying there, it seemed like a personal topic.

"well, to answer your question, i for a fact, am not fifteen. i'm twenty eight." you swung your feet from the bench in a child like manner.

"huh, would've never believed that. you've got quite a youthful glow. i remember my twenties-" he starts to ramble, and you realise this man is quite nostalgic in a sad sense, so you continue to let him speak.

"for someone who's only forty, you speak like you've got three lifetimes worth of experiences to give advice to someone who's pushing thirty." you intervened, and he bellows out another laugh, more heartfelt, and emotional.

"i've told you many things about myself, but not my name." he gestures to the empty seat beside you, charading if he could sit near you.

with a slight nod, you budge up a few centimetres, "so then, what's your name old man?" you huff, and take a breath of fresh air.

"toji fushiguro." confidence is exuding from his aura and you smile again.

"i prefer calling you old man."

a/n: this is more of a friendship than it is romantic relationship

- possibly might probably maybe make a part two

renaissance and rebirth. they’d seemed so easy for so long, something that oikawa toru could bask in underneath the sun, something he could hold and feel as they overtook him as easily as he could feel rain upon his open flesh.

water was meant to be rebirth, was it not? the ocean was meant to be his path to retribution, meant to swallow him whole and lap at the wounds that had trenched deep into his skin until they met his bone, and then he was meant to come out anew. he was meant to step out of the ocean as doubt washed off of him, he was meant to step into the depths of this earth and be released as an extension of this water and soil.

yet as the ocean pulls at his feet, as he watches the sand swirl beneath him, he feels no different. it’s silly now, to think that the earth would ever treat him as anything more than human, and yet he takes another step into the sea. he walks until it covers his calves, now, lets the water consume that part of his body as though it was only ever the ocean’s to have and to hold.

being human is a horribly fickle thing. he can feel the way the sun settles into his skin, he can feel the quiet breeze in his hair, the way the ocean pushes and pulls with every wave, and there is nothing more.

and yet, he is human and, despite this lack of rebirth, despite the way he is still the man he was before he wished for the ocean to overcome him, oikawa toru finds no need to beg.

he hears the way you step beside him in the water before he ever sees you settle next to him. the waves give to you, ripples moving around your joints and into the waters that crash against him.

and humanity reveals itself in moments like these, when oikawa’s chest tightens as your breath reaches his ears, as the sea salt air feels sweeter, a little more vivid in the sense that this is sure to be a memory—that as each moment passes it becomes nothing more than a suggestion in oikawa’s skull, and he will be sure to know the chill of his spine, the taste of the ocean, the twist of sunlight in your hair as well in five years as he does now.

humanity tends to reveal itself in the moments that define memories, not in the earthly waters, not in the wishes we have made for ourselves, and certainly not in the desire to let go that holds deep in the marrow of oikawa’s bones.

no, humanity is found in what tells him to stay.

“there,” you say, raising an index finger to the horizon. “a sailboat.” he follows your gaze and, sure enough, there rests what could only be described as the shadow of a sail deep in the ocean’s palm.

“good eye,” he replies, and then returns to you once more. you’ve always drawn him to you, as though you were a whisper he was desperately trying to hear—he could only wish to be close enough to you to know each of your secrets, to know the way you work as well as he knew the ground beneath his feet.

and yes, humanity is in his moments of memory, and yes, humanity is in the way he can feel the sun, the sand, the water, the breeze, but most importantly yes, his humanity is grounded in the rapture he finds in you.

“iwa would be surprised to find you so quiet, toru,” you say, and as always, he leans in closer to hear you speak.

“it’d be heartbreaking for him, i’m sure,” he muses, and he’s sure to catch the way you stifle laughter with your breath.

and this is what rapture feels like.

“for him to miss it? certainly.”

he rolls his eyes at you, and then you knock your shoulder into his, sending him off balance. he grabs onto you as he sways, watching as the water flows between the two of you, but of course you laugh while he pulls on your arm, bringing him back up to where he once stood. he doesn’t take his hand off of you, and you don’t move to release him either. instead, he wraps his arm around your shoulders, bringing you into him with a quiet ease.

neither one dares to speak again. the ocean seems to flow around you, melding you together until you feel more like one body than two. and perhaps humanity is something like this, a silence in understanding, the moments after laughter, the soreness after a smile.

oikawa leans down and presses his lips against your bare shoulder, kissing your flesh in uneven certainty. the movement is unpracticed, unfamiliar, and, in its most delicate form, human.

and perhaps it is not perfection, a lack of doubt, a need for renaissance and rebirth from the ocean that could ever scrape the humanity from oikawa’s bones. perhaps there is nothing that could dare to remove what could be from the wounds entrenched in his skin. and perhaps, most importantly, it is you that will remind him of this piece of humanity.

I THOUGJT IT WAS RN E ONLY ONE

uhm is it just me or my tumblr font got sized down 🤨 it looks like the small font now ???