Crying Omfg

crying omfg

It's a terrible day for rain

Man. Angst seems to be all I can write these days. Much thanks to a friend of mine who beta read this fic for me.

“Ne, Toru. You think one day we will be just like them? Start a family together? Have children, watch them grow up…” your voice trails off, watching a family of three play by the water.

The sun shines down, bathing the both of you in its golden glow. A small break in between missions is all the time he can get to spend with you, so most of the time your dates are simply taking walks with him.

“I’m sure we will,” he ruffles your hair, a small smile gracing his features. “Little Gojos running around the house, climbing all over you, won’t that be a sight to see.”

His hand slides over, long fingers intertwined with yours. His palm is warm, his touch gentle as he runs a thumb over your skin. You look up at him, confused as he places a feather light kiss to your knuckles, cheek and finally your lips.

“Any chance you have an extra heart? Mine’s been stolen!” he flashes you a cheeky grin, laughing as he dodges your attempt to slap him.

“That was so cheesy!” you yell. “At least try a little harder!”

“That’s all it took for you to fall for me though,” he hums. You can tell that his bright blue eyes are sparkling in mischief behind the blindfold. You don't need to see them to know what he’s feeling.

You laugh, smiling ever so brightly at him, words forming on your lips that are now lost to him.

The sound of rain fills his ears, and the water slowly turns red beneath his feet. He lifts his gaze to its source - a body, slumped against the wall stained with their blood. Crimson droplets fall from his fingers as he crouches, reaching over to brush back the hair covering their eyes. His finger shakily trails down their stone cold cheek, leaving a red streak behind.

Your body is cold, so cold. He’s not sure if the rain has made you colder, or if bodies of loved ones naturally felt colder than others, but all he can focus on is the fact that you’re just so cold, a far cry from the warmth he felt each time he hugged you tightly.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers, pressing his forehead against your lifeless face. He knows nothing will ever bring you back, least of all an empty apology. Saying it does nothing to alleviate the pain in his heart either.

“Gojo…” Utahime’s strained voice sounds behind him. He simply stands up, sliding his blindfold back on.

“We’re done here,” his voice betrays none of the turbulent emotions he feels as he walks away, hands shoved deep into his pockets. Ichiji remains silent as Gojo throws himself into the backseat of the car, slouching against the now wet leather seat.

“Home,” he says, nothing more. Ichiji doesn’t question anything. He knows of today’s mission, and from the looks of it, it was a success. If you could call it one.

The rest of the car ride is filled with silence, Gojo staring out of the window while Ichiji focuses on driving, leaving the sorcerer to grieve in peace. The sound of wipers clearing droplets of rain from the windshield is somehow noisier than usual, the high pitched squeaks piercing Gojo’s eardrums, reminding him of how alone he is now.

When your house slides into view, Gojo suddenly leans forward and says sharply, “No. Keep going. Drive to Jujutsu High.”

Surprised, Ichiji gives a quick nod, stepping on the accelerator again. Gojo flops back against the car seat, lifelessly watching your house pass by him in a blur. He can’t go back there anymore, not after he’s taken your life with his own hands.

Why’d you become a curse user? Why’d you turn against jujutsu society? Why’d you turn against him?

His hands begin to shake uncontrollably, memories of your last moments flashing through his mind. The way you were aiming for his throat, ready to kill, eyes filled with hate he never thought he’d see directed at him.

He had no choice. He had to put you down. In self-defense and to protect jujutsu society. Or so he keeps telling himself.

“I hate the higher-ups,” you mutter, kicking a small rock on the ground.

He raises an eyebrow at you, arm sliding around your waist, “oh, why?”

“I know what they’re trying to do by sending us on individual missions that are as far away from each other as possible. They want to separate us and take us out because they consider our relationship a threat,” you suddenly stop, looking up at him.

“I don’t want this stupid power play to continue,” you frown.

“Neither do I,” Gojo sighs. The both of you knew it was highly dangerous to get into a relationship and yet decided to take the risk, something he never regretted. You always brought a spark of joy into his life and made him feel like he could simply be Satoru, even if it was for brief moments at a time.

Each second he spent with you was a second where the burden of being the strongest jujutsu sorcerer was lifted from his shoulders, for he knew you were more than willing to help shoulder that responsibility.

“If only it was as simple as killing all of them,” you sigh, resting your head against his chest. He hugs you tighter in response, nuzzling his face into your hair.

“We will change this corrupt jujutsu society. One day we will have that happy family we dream of,” he whispers into your ear.

“I promise.”

So what went wrong along the way?

One moment you were happily stealing as much cotton candy from him as possible and the next you were out for his blood, mercilessly slaughtering any jujutsu sorcerer that stood in your way. What had happened during your last mission?

He couldn’t shake the fight from his memory. The way you refused to talk it out with him, your cursed energy baying for his blood as he did all he could to dodge your frenzied attacks whilst ensuring that he didn’t hurt you. That was the first time Gojo Satoru had ever been afraid in a fight, but it wasn’t for himself. He was afraid for you.

“Don’t get in my way!” you snarl, pushing his arm away and sending a burst of cursed energy at him. He dodges with ease, trying once again to grab your arm but you throw every last ounce of your jujutsu technique at him, wrestling your arm free.

“Calm down babe! Talk to me! What’s going on? We can get through this together!” he reaches out to you and once again you brush him off.

“Shut up! Either you stand aside and let me pass or you die alongside everyone else!” blood pours down your face from injuries sustained from earlier fights and into your eyes. Wiping it only causes the crimson liquid to be further smeared on your face and you spit out the blood that has trickled into your mouth.

“You’re already badly injured. I don’t want to hurt you any further,” Gojo frowns, throwing up Infinity to block all of your attacks.

You’re not thinking straight, he notes, as you continue to throw everything you have at him. Under normal circumstances, you would have cast domain amplification to override his Infinity but at present you hadn’t done so.

“Well that’s unfortunate,” you growl. “Because I have no qualms about hurting you!”

In your angry haze, your slip ups occur far more frequently and Gojo takes the opportunity to lock you in a choke hold.

“The higher ups have tasked me to kill you.”

He feels you tense against him, and for a split second he can see fear in your eyes but anger quickly returns as you spit your next words out like venom.

“So that’s what you’re here for? To kill me?”

“I don’t want to,” he releases you to prove his point, hands raised in surrender now that you’ve calmed down more. You slide into our fighting stance, eyes narrowed in suspicion but you’ve stopped trying to kill him. That’s a win in his book.

“So what are you here for?”

“To ask what happened that made them suddenly want you dead.”

You take a step forward, letting out a tired sigh.

“I killed someone important. They were trying to isolate me then kill me and pretend as though I died on the mission. But they underestimated my abilities. That’s why I’ve been branded as a traitor,” your cursed energy levels drop to a bare minimum as you slump against him, exhausted.

“You can’t do anything about it. Not as one person, no matter who you are. Because it’s undeniable that I killed an important jujutsu sorcerer, which is treason against jujutsu society.”

“No. I will find a way. I can’t lose you,” he shakes his head desperately. “You’re all I have left.”

“Toru. You have to leave me behind. For the sake of the new jujutsu world we dream of. I know you think you can't do it, but you have to move on. I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my side of our promise,” you smile, cupping his cheek.

Taking a few steps back, you ready yourself for the fight to resume. You close your eyes and recall each and every time the higher ups stood in your way of a happy life with the man you love, letting the emotions consume you.

Your cursed energy levels spike once again, flooding your entire body. When your eyes opened for the last time, the unending anger has drowned everything else out.

“So, please forgive me.”

Back at Jujutsu High, he finds the small red box he meant to give you when you came back from your mission and opens it, staring at the thin metal band that lies within. The diamond inlaid in the metal no longer glimmers in the backdrop of the pouring rain, bringing fresh tears to his swollen eyes.

Letting out a broken yell, he throws both the box and ring out of the window, collapsing onto his bed.

“I’m sorry,” he sobs, hugging his knees to his chest and bowing his head.

But sorry can’t bring you back.

...guys im lowkey getting back into my kpop fanfiction phase pls i thought i escaped this years ago 😭😭

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals

mi amors im so so sorry for the inactivity i have huge exams coming up if i fail these im gonna burst into fat tears

THIS IS LITERALLY SO GOOD IM CRYING

Remember Me

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x gn!reader

Warnings: angst, MAJOR character death (wouldn’t be aot without it ✌🏻), not proof-read, all hurt, no comfort :) my first levi post and I broke his heart hehe but this isn’t as sad as I originally intended so ?? Ig that’s nice ??

Aun en la distancia, nunca vayas a olvidar que yo contigo siempre voy, recuérdame…  

He had never meant to fall in love, for love in this world only brought hurt and agony to a soldier such as him; love was something he had learned to equate with loss, a ruthless grip in his chest that forced him awake most nights, only to haunt him with the faces of those he once knew, ones now covered in blood; a crimson so similar to the sight that forever stained his rough, war-torn, hands, something he had become more than acquainted with throughout his years.

It was due to this world and all the loss it saw that he had promised himself, with each fallen comrade and each grieving loved one, that he would no longer devote his heart to anything other than the cause, because despite being the world’s named strongest, it was a title never self-proclaimed. Levi was merely only a pawn in the wretched game of war, and there were only so many hits a wounded soldier could take before they turned fatal; he would no longer allow himself to be compromised by any weakness in his heart, it was something the world couldn’t afford.

This was a promise he had made to himself on a cold, lonely night where he sat hunched over at his desk with discomfort shooting throughout his spine; it was a promise he made as he sat there sobbing into his hands after signing yet another daunting stack of paperwork titled K.I.A; a symbol of loss that still cut deep no matter how many lives he had witnessed coming to their end, because how can one ever truly become accustomed to such tragic sight? Because no one was strong enough to withstand the horrid end that the scouts faced in the field, no one could witness such an atrocity and return without succumbing to the same darkness that plagued the silent hallways.

He had promised this to himself, to save himself from yet another tragic heartbreak.

Yet, it was a promise that you had somehow made him break.

Because, Levi had never meant to fall in love, but even so, he was not ashamed to admit that absolutely nothing could’ve stopped his heart from diving straight into a uncontrolled freefall just so it could crash right beside yours; because Levi had fallen in love with you, and how could he ever regret such a feeling when you looked at him with such a tender warmth swimming in your eyes?

You had made it so easy, that loving you was now as simple as breathing to him; you had made love so easy, that it was nothing to him now but second nature.

For you had shown him what true happiness could taste like, a refreshing taste that cleansed his palette from the bile and salt that burned him with every breath; it was his new favourite dish, though he would refuse to admit, the taste of you and your love was more delectable than any fine pastry or any expensive tea, and he consumed it all greedily like a man starved.

You, always so warm like the sun on a beautiful summers day, had melted the high walls of ice that had encompassed his aching heart with just a small smile as you brought him his evening tea; he had never felt so light nor so free other than when you beamed at him with a simple yet gentle, “go to sleep soon, Captain, your health is important too.”

You had shown him that you would be contently patient, waiting for him to be ready for every next step and never being thrown off by his strong, cold exterior; you made him feel worth it at every possible corner, showing him that he was in fact a person worth staying for; and whilst he was hopeless in telling you just how thankful he was for that patient perseverance you had dedicated to him, words always seeming to fail him when it mattered most, he could tell with each adoring look that you gifted him, that you knew all along.

It was all this together with your heartbeat, which had quickly become his favourite song, a soothing lullaby on nights filled with nightmares and no sleep, had finally shown him the meaning of true peace. It was the melody of your heart that chased away the bad thoughts and haunting screams to which he knew that with your heart’s simple beat, all he would be able to hear now was the beautiful chorus of security and adoration your love had granted him.

So, with soft caresses and gentle words, Levi had slowly found himself floating in a daydream where only you and him existed, protected with the safety of your dedication to one another.

But silly little daydreams don’t last long, not if you are Levi Ackerman.

And he was a fool for thinking maybe this would be different, maybe you would be different, that he could keep you by his side until his very last breath, because nothing could ever change the fact that Levi Ackerman was a man destined to be alone; a man destined and subjected to watch all those around him perish whilst he had no choice but to sit helplessly and watch.

Levi Ackerman was a fool, a fool for thinking he could keep you safe.

He knew it as he held you in his arms and watched you bleed out in the middle of a muddy field littered with corpses.

He knew it as he harshly commanded, with sobs trapped in his throat, “Don’t leave me. Don’t you dare fucking leave me, that’s an order.”

With his choked and broken words his thumb delicately swipes across your cheeks, ridding the stray tears and dirt that tainted your skin. It was near impossible to even look at you because to see you wear any expression other than happiness, nevermind the excruciating pain your face was screaming at him, nearly made his own heart stop and his breath cease; for his heart couldn’t help but scold him in agony that this should be him laying here bleeding out, never you.

Yet, he was hopeful - or perhaps delusional - in thinking that the medics would be here soon and they would fix you and make you better. You just needed to wait.

But with a frail voice, you lifted your hand, stained with your tears and blood, to his cheek and rasped a wet, “Promise me that you’ll remember me, Levi. Even in distance, promise me that you’ll remember.”

It was with those words that Levi knew that perhaps life was something you could no longer wait for. It was with those blasphemous pleas that he was disturbed to hear the bitter sound of surrender in your voice, for you, his toughest, bravest, and most determined soldier, were resigning yourself to lose the cruel battle of life and death.

It was then that Levi had decided that if you wouldn’t fight, then he would have to do it for you, like he had been doing for all of humanity for so very long.

So, he pushed down harder on the gaping wound on your abdomen, furiously trying to halt the incessant bleeding, once again staining his hands with the blood of another comrade, “I don’t need to remember you when you will be right beside me, you hear me, brat?”

And he ignored the way you no longer winced at the pressure, ignored the way his heart jumped in panic at your body’s lack of response. Ignored it all for his delirious vision where you would be fine, where you would be ok; chanting in his mind over and over again like a holy mantra that you would be ok, that you would be fine.

You will be ok.

You will be fine.

You will be ok.

You will be fi-

With tender eyes you gazed into his, “I will always… be with you… Levi, in every… dream and in your… heart, but-”

“No, no buts. You will be fine, you hear me? Enough with this mushy crap, the medics are on their way, just hang on a little longer.”

Yet, the words he fiercely uttered were only a reassurance to himself because he could see it in your beautiful, ruined face that you knew you wouldn’t be fine, that he was trying to convince himself of an ending that simply was never meant to be his.

It destroyed him.

And with your very own choked sob, that pushed a crimson curse past your chapped lips, you begged, “Please.. don’t cry, Levi. Though I… have to go, you… shouldn’t cry, please… don’t cry.”

But how could he not cry? How could he look down at you, as you struggled to breathe and gasped in pain, and not cry as you died a death you did not deserve?

What you were asking was unfair, it was so fucking unfair.

Your hand dropped from his cheek, flopping brokenly beside you as you drowsily muttered, “I’m so… tired… Levi, can I… just close my eyes… for a little bit?”

And as you both became stained with the scarlet puddle forming beneath you, he internally screamed profanities and chants of no.

He wouldn’t let you close your eyes for that would be the end, and even though it was so incredibly selfish of him, he decided this isn’t how you would go, not when Levi had plans of growing old with you, of opening that damn tea shop, and maybe even having a brat of your own.

No, you would die peacefully as you slept beside him many years from now, not bleeding out on the battlefield, he wouldn’t let you go like this.

And Levi was never a man to beg but he would easily get down on his hands and knees to grovel for your safety, for you to stay awake and live out the life you had both dreamed of.

Because you had to stay awake, for him.

Please, please don’t leave him alone.

Please.

Yes, Levi was never a man to beg, but for you? For you he pleaded, “No, keep them open, baby, please just keep them open a little longer for me? Let me see your eyes.”

And as he lightly tapped your face your eyes fluttered open, only to break him just a little bit more, because your beautiful eyes were devoid of the warmth he had come to love; for what Levi saw instead was the clasp of death creeping over your eyes as the back of his throat burned at its presence.

And Levi is strong, but who is he to deny the fear he feels when the reaper makes a home in those same eyes he calls his sanctuary? And as the biting hiss of desperation floods its way through his bloodstream, he becomes someone he could not even begin to recognise as he rambles to you in his frenzy because you couldn’t leave him, not now. Please.

So, he talks, franticly talks to keep you with him and talks to remind you of plans you had yet to complete. Talks to know you are still with him, heart beating and alive.

“Remember about how you wanted to go to Sina to buy this new tea you had heard about? You said you were going to buy it so we could both try it together, you can’t cancel on me now, you brat. Plus, I don’t remember what the tea was called, what was it called, love? It is probably something way too fruity for my taste, isn’t it? You hate how bitter my tea can be sometimes, but I love the way you make it, sweet like you. How do you make your tea again? Tell me, y/n.”

Yet, you remained silent with weakening, harsh breaths and as each second passed he saw your spirit fading; and as he witnessed you slowly giving in to the sweet lull of death, what had he left to do now other than pull you closer? For now he was pathetically grasping at your weak body tightly, pulling you further into his chest with trembling hands, as if it would somehow keep you grounded to him, to life, just for a little longer.

“No, no. Keep your eyes open just a little longer, the medics will be here soon. Keep your eyes open an-and I will get you that cat, you remember? The one you spotted on the training ground? We can name it Klaus, no matter what, we can call it Klaus. I lied, you brat, I like the shitty name, just keep your eyes open and I will stay up all day and night trying to catch that stupid fucking cat. Just keep your damn eyes open.”

But Levi was a fool, for death had no time for bargaining and his begging fell on deaf ears as you breathily whispered out your final plea, “Please… remember… Levi…. I love you.”

And his heart cried out with him as he lowered his head and desperately whimpered into your ear, “y/n… please, just stay for a little longer.”

But you were gone, falling limp in his arms as you had gone cold.

Why were you now so cold?

In disbelief, wide eyed, he shakes your still body, vision blurring and his face starting to sting as the salty rivers slowly mix with his open cuts. He shakes you, getting more and more desperate the longer you refuse to reply. He shakes you, shakes you harder and harder until the dam breaks and humanity’s strongest is reduced to nothing but a broken man, a grieving lover.

“No. Don’t you do this to me, you brat. I didn’t say it back, you can’t go until I say it back.”

But your heart had gone silent, no longer singing along to his with a sweet tune, no longer united in your joint serenade.

And what else had Levi to do other than to cry?

Because he had fought, he had killed, and he had remained strong, but where had that gotten him? How well had this facade worked out for him in the end? He had exhausted every possible option to take and now he had no choice left other than to crumble and fall like a bird shot out of the sky.

So he sobbed, grieved for you, screamed for you, let his heart rage at the cruelty of this world when in reality, he had no one else to blame other than himself, for everyone close to Levi Ackerman is doomed to die and he was a fool to think you would be any different.

And with the rest of the remaining scouts now gathered on this bloodied field, a second too late, gaping at his harrowing display of broken grief, he could no longer find it in himself to care for the world around him; not as he held his only semblance of hope dead in his arms; not as his tears fell onto your lifeless face and mixed with your own; not as he gently closed your empty eyes, void of the warmth he had all but memorised, and laid you to rest; not as he slowly came to terms with the fact that he had unknowingly condemned you to such a tragic fate.

For Levi Ackerman had killed you, all for the sake of a happy ending he was never meant to live.

And Levi Ackerman would remember you, for you would be a ghostly reminder of all he was never supposed to have.

A/N: :)

CRYING?????? ME??? MAYBE

people and their egos.

genre. angst

main characters. gojo satoru, gn!reader

wc. 0.5k

a/n. not proofread btw,,, made this at 2am</3 this was mostly inspired by the tiktok sound thingy so like uhm yeah

you're not sure what time it really is right now. 10pm? 9pm? 12am? you don't know, but you're tired. you want to rest. you want to shut your bedroom door, hide under the covers and just sleep till the sun rises and sets. you want to sleep forever.

the house is silent. you are silent and so is satoru.

a normal person would apologize, say that he or she was at fault and say they would never do it again.

a person with a big ego? keep quiet. and that was what the both of you were doing right now.

you're seated on the couch, eyes shut and face buried in your hands as you taste the salty tears that had trickled down your eyes. satoru is standing at the kitchen counter, hands resting on it with his head down.

he sighs, "look, let's not do this today. we're both exhausted and clearly, not thinking straight. let's just—"

"i'm tired." you say, cutting him off. he nods at that, "so am i. so let's just sleep and—" you cut him off again, "no, satoru. i'm tired."

he looks over at you, eyes shivering as he evidently starts to panic a little. when he doesn't say anything, you look back up and meet his anxious eyes. you're pretty sure you look disgusting — messy hair, puffy, bloodshot eyes and cheeks tinted with dried up tears — but it's really the last thing you're concerned about.

"let's admit it, we do this every night. argue, run away from it, ignore each other then argue again. it's..." you trail off, scoffing ridiculously, "...immature of us. with our big-ass egos, we'll never make this work."

satoru gulps, hurrying towards you to kneel down in front of you as he grasps your hands in his. with tears welling up in his pretty blue eyes, satoru utters softly with a cracked voice, "okay, then let's not run away, hm? i apologize okay? i shouldn't have been late again and i should have at least texted you. so don't say that. don't—" he brings your hands up to his lips, pecking it, "—don't do this, please? i love you so much."

your heart tears at the sight. sniffling, you smile thankfully, apologizing as well, "i'm sorry too. i shouldn't have just screamed at you the moment you got home 'cause you were stressed and all." he smiles at you, seemingly sighing of relief as he responds, "i love you."

for a moment, it's just like the beginning. when the both of you had simply talked things out and made up easily. until it doesn't.

grinning painfully, you nod as you peck his forehead, "i love you too," he smiles. "but i can't."

his smile fades, "no. we can get through this. you're not alone. we said we would solve everything together so, don't." he pleads, hand gripping yours tighter and tighter.

"satoru, don't you see? we're just apologizing for the sake of it. this will never end. you and i, we're-we're never going to work out. not anymore." you say, pulling away and avoiding his gaze. at the end of the day, the same cycle would always repeat. it didn't matter if the both of you had put aside your egos. in the end, this was never going to work.

"but, i love you." satoru croaks, helpless, "and so do you. so why? why are you letting go?"

right, he loves you and you love him too. all the more, you should let go. because if you didn't do so now, it'll just gradually worsen.

"sometimes—" you smile sadly at him, looking away from his gorgeous eyes that fill with tears. he drops your and hand and onto the ground, crying.

"—loving each other, just isn't enough."

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