ugokuna

| she, her | 22 | idk what i'm doing with this blog

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Whispers In The Dark

whispers in the dark

han daewi x reader

warnings: fluff and angst (i honestly don’t know at this point, like it’s kinda sad but at the same time it’s not.. once you decide to read it you’ll understand), time skip (the characters are aged up a bit after goh tournament), spoilers??? but not really so don’t worry (as someone who’s caught up with the tgoh ik some readers are still pretty new to the tgoh so i didn’t write anything that would give away anything --maybe some verrrry subtle stuff --that i won’t give away-- if you’ve read up to the final arc, bc other than that my lips are sealed shut)

synopsis: all those nights when your boyfriend would come home late, he thinks you’re sound asleep as he spills every word about his day and love for you. until one night, when he says something that makes you come clean about what you’ve been up to.

No matter how many times you’ve done this --pretending to be sleep just to hear Daewi spill his honest feelings on the table in the dark-- it was always a challenge to keep your breathing even, your lips from smiling, your eyes from opening.

Of course, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel guilty. No, you felt so, so, so guilty that it made you want to come clean about everything. In all the years you’ve known your boyfriend, there was one thing you knew exceptionally well: he never really talks about his feeling or emotions.

Sure, if he was feeling sentimental he always told you one of two things: “I missed you” or “I love you.” He never really said those two things in one sentence, surprisingly. Or if he knew you were feeling needy and clingy more than you usually did, he’d tell you the things you wanted to hear. Not what he wanted to say.

You never really minded it, really. He was more of a realist, rather than a romanticist like his friend Jin Mori.

The sound of the front door of your shared apartment door unlocking. The sound of his swift feet moving towards you without hesitation. The low swish of your bedroom door opening. His exhausted sigh from a long day his job demanded from him. The tap of his nail as it hit the buttons he was unbuttoning. The shuffling of clothes being discarded. The water from the shower head hitting the bathtub. All the sounds, it was beautiful to you. Daewi, he was beautiful.

You’ve grown to notice the way your boyfriend spoke since he began talking to you only a month ago. The soft intake of a breath as he moves from one word to another. His pitch changing when he said certain words like “want” and “this.” The soft vibrations he sends into the bed when he speaks. The low rumble of his voice as whispers to you, and you wonder if he realizes any of this.

“I’m home,” he mumbles routinely to you as he sits on the bed, back hunched as he dries his hair.

His voice, no matter how many times you’ve heard it, always made your heart speed up. It takes every ounce of you to calm it down. Even with your eyes closed, you didn’t want to out yourself. Especially since your back wasn’t facing towards him like it usually did.

Risking it, you open one eyelid. The only light coming into the room was the bathroom, and you managed to make out his broad and sturdy form. Daewi’s back muscle rippled and flexed as he continued to dry his hair. He sported nothing but sweatpants.

Daewi groans as he pushes himself up, towel over his head as he goes to turn off the light. Once he begins to turn back to the bed, you immediately shut your eye, putting your best act of sleep. You go of out of your way to make sure your arms and legs are in a position that only looks natural when sleeping.

The bed dips and then sinks under his weight. Daewi lays on his side, staring at your sleeping form even if he can’t see you all that well. You can’t see it but the corner of his mouth quirks up as he pushes the strands that’s fallen onto your face away before carefully skimming his lips to your forehead, trailing down to your cheek and then lip.

“See? I made it home again, just as I promised you, didn’t I?” His curled finger skims the cheek he just kissed, as if to brand it there, before dropping it down to his side. He never missed a day to say that to you.

Lately, with the physical demand of his job, you had expressed anxieties and concerns to Daewi a month ago. His job usually put him in danger, and as much as you know how important his job is right now, you can’t help but worry about his well being too.

“As someone who cares about you, don’t you think I deserve to worry about you?” You couldn’t look at him, not with this heavy atmosphere so early in the morning. You were leaning against the kitchen counter, waiting for the water to boil to make coffee for the both of you.

“Hey,” Daewi said, spreading his both his feet shoulder-width-apart so he was eye level with you, his large hands gently cupping your face in them, calloused thumbs running small circles against your cheek. “Can you look at me?”

You wait for only a moment before holding his gaze. “Daewi...” you sighed, not really knowing how to go about the conversation. What was the right way to word it? Instead, all you can do at the moment it take put your smaller hand over his.

“Tell me what your worried about, (Y/n), so I can understand.”

“I’m just scared,” you told him truthfully, something you both valued. “What if something happens to you while you’re doing you job. Something I can’t do anything about?”

Daewi looks away before looking back at you, trying to put on a smile of comfort. “That won’t happen. I went through The God of High School, didn’t I?”

You sigh out a laugh. “Yeah, so did I. You beat my team to the pulp.”

“Ha...” Daewi laughs as well, going in for a quick peck on the lips before pulling you into him. “How could I forget? That was when I fell in love with you. So try not to worry so much, okay?”

You shake your head against his shirt, listening to the steady thumps of his heart. “I can’t help but think that one day, I’ll get a call from Jin Mori in the middle of the night telling me that you’ll never come home. How am I supposed to deal with that information knowing that that is what your job demands from you?”

“That won’t happen. I promise you, (Y/n), that I’ll come home every night.”

“You promise?” you ask, mumbling it into his chest, fisting your hand into his cotton t-shirt.

“Of course,” Daewi says, putting his chin atop your head, pulling you tighter into the hug.

“(Y/n),” your boyfriend hums to himself, turning onto his back. “I had a pretty rough day today. Though, if I think more on it, it’s not due to Nox, but rather Jin Mori.”

You practically can see him close his eyes in disbelief.

He’s quiet for a long time, making you a bit nervous. Perhaps today was physically draining for him and he’s knocked out. You don’t want to be greedy, but you want to hear more of his sultry voice.

“I’m lying,” he whispers more to himself than to you. “I... I had a rough day because of Nox.”

Something about tonight felt weird. You just couldn’t place what it was just yet.

“I had thought, while facing Nox, that I was going to break my promise to you even if I didn’t want to.”

Your heart stops for a second. It was such a raw and honest confess, and for a split moment, you wish he would just lie to you. It was getting harder to stay composed

“If... if it wasn’t for Jin Mori today, I don’t think I would be laying here, in this tranquil home of ours, with you. I almost died today, and it made me realize how much I’ll miss loving you if I was gone.”

Your throat was feeling heavy, and it was damn hard trying to push that choking feeling down. Good god, he was being so sentimental and you wanted to join him. Was this the same Daewi you first met all those years ago?

Daewi chuckled softly, running a hand up and down his chest. “I know that you know that I’m not good with my emotions when it comes to romance, so I’m grateful I was able to learn along the way with you. Thank you for the patience you’ve shown me, for loving me, for being there with me.”

You hear him stifle a yawn. And as much as you know how important sleep is, you want him to keep letting everything he’s bottled up for the past five years out into the open.

“And I know that I don’t say it often, but I love you. I really do love you, (Y/n). I love how fast you accepted me for who I was. I love how soft you feel against all my calloused hands. I love how you keep your nails short so you can keep practicing martial arts with me. I love how much you hate it when I wake you up too early in the morning. I love how it drives you crazy when you hear someone chewing obnoxiously loud. I love how embarrassed you get when you do something embarrassing. And I’m not going to break my promise with you ”

A pregnant pause.

Daewi takes a trembling intake of a breath, something you definitely did not expect from him. “God, if you could hear what I’m about to say right now, you would think I am a coward, but I want my last name to be yours soon, (Y/n).”

Your body goes rigid and you don’t even care if he notices. In that moment, everything seems to stop. Your body is hot. Your heart burning. You can’t help but open your eyes to look at the very man you love.

“I want to marry you. I want you to be Han (Y/n), so let’s get married soon.”

Seeming to be satisfied with how much he’s spilled to you, Daewi turns towards you, expecting you to be asleep. But when he finds you wide awake, with wide eyes, that are staring at him with such a passionate gaze, he can’t help but stifle out nonsense as he tries to cover up his burning face. “I thought you were asleep.”

“Who said I was asleep?” Hearing your own voice scared you a bit. You didn’t actually think through what you were going to say once he found you awake.

He blinks at you. Once.Twice. In disbelief. “H-How much did you hear?”

“All of it,” you whisper gently, afraid to break the atmosphere he built. “Everything.”

“Everything?” he says, flabbergasted. He wanted his soul to leave his body right now. “Every conversation from then to now?”

You reach out and take the hand covering his face away so you can see him clearly. “I did.” You kissed his warm fingertips and his right eye before pecking his lips.

Daewi lets you take it, not once, not twice, but thrice.

“Do you promise? With what you just said?”

He wraps a hand around your waist before pulling you into him, hiding his face into your chest. God, he missed this. Missed laying in bed with you when you’re awake. Missed your embrace while you’re awake. He missed being with you, alone, in the dark, with each other awake.

“I do,” he says confidently, pulling you into a kiss.

Whispers In The Dark

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