[] It's Not Until Everything Slows Down And You Both Lay Tangled Upon Each Other, That You Realize How

[♡] It's not until everything slows down and you both lay tangled upon each other, that you realize how much you love him. As your bodies try to seek full relaxation, you don't mind the ache in your legs and the marks on your hips cause it was mere proof of how he had given himself to you tonight. He had demonstrated how much you meant to him in the most special and pleasurable of ways, different than the other occasions in which the both of you spent the night together.

Getting to know Kim Namjoon was like falling through an endless rabit hole, in the most positive of ways, cause who wouldn't fall for his charms and his looks? His kindness? All about his personality? You realize that even if you'd promised yourself to someone else, it was the biggest mistake of your life and he was the one who you truly belong to.

And as you lay on his chest you’re able to feel the kind of comfort you needed after one of the most tiring weeks of all; and it feels like the world stopped the minute you stepped into this hotel suite; your own little universe in between these four walls.

And you know it's not right. It simply isn't. But fate was cruel to the both of you, and the pain of not being together after realizing you both were the one for each other, was even worse.

You both know that your phones (on silent mode) are probably blowing up cause you both were too powerful and your lives were full of responsibilities you both had decided to leave behind, on hold until you both had the strength to continue. He reminds you that there isn’t much time to spend together after the deed is done, but he cannot find it in himself to get up and get dressed to leave, instead he keeps still and he takes the time to stroke your delicate skin, his strong hands wandering from the back of your neck to your lower back. Neither of you is ready, but it was time to go back to your usual lives.

"I don't want to go.." you whine. Being trained all your life to not insist, to not beg nor need something more than yourself always stopped you from really expressing your feelings to him, but tonight you make an extra effort to do so. You hadn't been swayed by his money, power or reputation but his simplicity behind closed doors, and it took two months working on a project between the both of you to fall deeply in love with each other.

And tonight he confessed his love for you. You’re surprised because those three simple words and their real sincerity were unbeknownst to you, a territory you were always too weary to cross, but this time around, it felt right. It suddenly felt okay to feel what you feel, and it was okay because he was there to pick up the pieces you’d kept to yourself all these years.

He’d made an extra effort to understand the puzzle that you were and solved it effortlessly, and you had gladly gifted your heart to him the second you felt the kind of security he could only provide to you.

“No one ever told me they loved me before.” it was your opportunity to open up even more to him, and you know his silence is considerate and sincere, it gives him the time to think about his words carefully, trying to avoid letting you down.

"Well.. I love you. I mean it." it’s simple and to the point, an irrefutable fact, and it’s enough to make you get up to really look at him. His eyes inmediately search for you and one hand gets up to trace the diamond necklace he had specially bought for you, the one you wore tonight to one of the most important business meetings, knowing it was a sign you both only could understand, a sign that you were truly his, even though the man that had been faster in puting a ring on your finger was sitting beside you and in front of him. "More than whoever made you feel so scared."

And so the night ends and the both of you end up getting up anyways, ready to face the world. When you get ready to leave he takes extra care of you, even pulling up the zipper on the back of your dress, his hands cheekily wandering on parts of your body that make you blush and giggle with happiness. You love him. You do. And the words tumble clumsily out of your mouth because it still is something so new and out of the ordinary, something you're not used to saying. He offers you the biggest most reassuring smile through the mirror and he takes it upon himself to turn you around and put his hands around your head to hold you.

When he says it back, he watches the way your delicate eyes close and you give him a smile, and he suddenly feels this unbelievable warmth inside his chest. he'd never felt this before. "don't break my heart, hm?" you smile at him and fix his crisp black suite, removing any imperfection intruding on the expensive material. it's the only way you can think now of showing him how much you love him.

And when you turn around to pick your bag, he searches for your hand. "You deserve so much better, even better than this" he makes it a mission to assure you, but you only offer him a shrug of your shoulders, you know what he means, but to you it doesn't matter at all. Even one minute of his time meant so much to you. "I promise i'm going to give it to you."

[♡] "how can i help you?" his deep voice right by your ear makes the hair behind your neck stand tall and proud, and a shiver runs down your body when he runs his long fingers through your skin, finally positioning themselves at your shoulders, lightly massaging them.

you can feel his chin really close to you and you notice the way he whispers the words in front of him while reading, your biochemistry book intimidating him inmediately. you laugh when you notice he gets up in an instant. "i'm sorry baby, but that's hard.." he sounds kind of sad and you give him a tiny smile, looking up to find him giving you one of those pouts you love so much. "i know.." you mutter, and you slightly caress the hands on your shoulder. "thank you though" he gives you a quick hug with all of his will and you laugh at the sudden jolt of movements, your face full of his dark curls. "tae!" you chuckle once again when he gives you the fattest smooch on your cheek, a tiny peck on your lips joining afterwards.

"i'm lending you all of my strength to get through it, i love you so much"

[♡] you had been patient. you had waited and waited. one month away from him with hundred of miles in between? sure, you can wait. little to no communication from how heavy his schedules were? pfft, no worries, you understand. but just when you thought you could finally have him all to yourself, the sudden addition of those 10 days of quarantine made you turn into a crazy woman. you had been through the whole month waiting without a single complain, but your patience has its own limits. you were just this close to start pulling your hair from how desperate you felt, and that's why the minute he comes through that door, you're wearing almost nothing and you want nothing but him.

your plans almost come to a halt when you watch him as he gets his luggage in. he's tired. you can see it in the way his back is hunched as he closes the door and his fringe covers his eyes but not the bags underneath them. but you decide to be selfish for once and still walk to the entryway and hug him as tight as you can, your lips searching for his but falling right onto his jaw when he stumbles from your sudden appearance.

"baby, not now. I'm so tired" you know he is; his tired voice begs you to stop, and his eyes barely look at your way. he knows you so well though; he knows what you want and what your actions mean. but you don't take it personal; if it was under another circumstance, you're confident that seokjin would have jumped your bones, just like you wanted.

"seokjin-ah" it had been years since the last time he even tried to reject your advances. you knew he was tired, rightfully so, but you'd waited for him too. tonight, your rational mind is clouded by neediness and longing for him. that's why you'd prepared everything; from the new sweet perfume you had splurged in, to the lingerie you'd retreated from one of the forgotten boxes from the back of the closet, nevermind the light curls in your hair and the light lipstick on your lips. everything was planned to a tee.

"don't go to sleep yet." he looks at you while unbuttoning his shirt and you cannot help but whine at him. "I'm so tired, baby. You're not understanding me" and as he sits down on the bed to take his socks off, you take the opportunity to crawl behind him and your hands wander off to his wide shoulders like a reflex, massaging his soft skin in the way you know he likes the most. "but I got all pretty for you.. I love you, I missed you" he sighs when your lips start to gift light pecks to his neck, your hands busy going through his fluffy hair.

"don't I look pretty? you haven't looked at me once ever since you got here." the grumble incoming from his chest makes your body turn up its engines. you're so close to make him give in.

"you're always the prettiest." his eyes look at you through the mirror standing right on the side of the bed. "I missed you" you purr at him, your hands finally being able to freely explore his soft torso. you appreciate the warmth of his skin and you moan when he turns around to finally look at your eyes. the light turquoise bustier is finally being appreciated by his own eyes and his hands dare to wander off until they make you melt right onto him. he's right where you want him to be.

"you're a brat, you know that?" he holds your chin with one of his hands and you look at his eyes, the heat in between your legs making it impossible for you to stay still. "welcome home, baby" you giggle and give him the brightest most happiest smile when he flips you over just so that you're right under him. he doesn't say a single word as his left arm extends to turn the lights off. you're so excited.

[♡] "baby, come on! i'm winning!" he says, his laugh laced with pure happiness. you roll your eyes at him, fixing your work clothes in the mirror one last time, hurriedly spraying perfume on your neck, ready to go out.

the both of you had decided to have an spontaneous karaoke session in the middle of the day, and you had been having so much fun while having an almost brunch-like meal, but now, he was staying while you had to go to work, and it was hard, because he was so pretty today, his hair ruffled just the way you liked and he was in such a good mood, everything was perfect. but you couldn't stay with him, not even a chance. your brain had worked ten times harder than your heart to convince you of that.

"i love you so much, give me a kiss" you interrupt his extra note changes and grab his both cheeks with one hand, his lips puckering up, ready to reciprocate your kiss. "mwah!" he exaggeratedly exclaims and smiles once he hears your chuckles. "have a great day, baby" his bunny smile is the last thing you see from your living room once you close your apartment door.

fuck.

[♡] "You've been a bad girl, woman" he says with his busan satoori on full force. "Hands where i can see them, ma'am"

It was going to be the most perfect planned night. He had planned everything, from the food your baby was going to eat so that she could fall asleep as quick as possible, to the costume he was wearing and the handcuffs in his hands that he had stolen from his best friend Jimin, an actual cop. But he didn’t exactly steal it, more like borrowed it since he was on his honeymoon and Jungkook was in charge of taking care of his house while he was absent, handcuffs he had surprisingly found in Jimin’s bedroom. 

You end up giggling when he finally latches the handcuffs behind your back after a little bit of struggle and he whines. "Yah! Stay in character" it was amusing to hear him stomp his feet, almost like he was throwing a fit.

It was jungkook's idea of doing this roleplay. He wanted to spice up your sex life after having your first daughter, and the first thing that came to his mind was to roleplay, since the sir and daddy kink 'thingy' made him giggle like a schoolgirl.

"Sorry, sorry" you try to hide your amused smile as you felt him pressed against you, holding onto the handcuffs with one hand and the other one making sure your front was glued to the wall.

"you're gonna have to come with me" he announces once again, in character. "you have the right to remain silent and anything you say or do may be used against you in the court of our bed.."

  [♡] “let’s have breakfast together”

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

genre: angst, established relationship

warnings: i don’t think they’re needed

word count: 1.5k

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thinking about when was the last time he had the opportunity to truly look at you makes him realise about how the time keeps going by unapologetically.

it's been so long, and the only difference compared to the last time is the lack of infatuation towards you, the lack of the influence of the honeymoon phase. he remembers loving looking at you while you got pretty, prettier than you already were. there was a time where even the sweet perfume you always wear made him feel jittery and warm inside once you were near him. even if he tried to really think about it, he doesn't remember when the indifference started, when the both of you started to do your own thing and stopped caring about each other. he now looks at you sitting in your vanity and feels intimidated, feels dread when thinking of speaking to you, your coldness and how distanced you'd gotten through the years not helping him at all.

the peachy blush highlighted the apple of your cheeks and made your face look warmer, even though you'd grown to be one of the coldest and most serious people he'd ever met, he remembers perfectly and knows the kind of warmth that blooms in your chest every time you see simple things that make you happy. there was a time that cold facade always remained outside of your apartment and personal lives, until it didn't. maybe that's one of the reasons he'd gotten so far away from you.

in one of the deepest compartments of his brain he saves the memory of meeting you in college and enjoying the you that you were, the way you'd been and how you weren't as ruthless as you were today in your home and in your workspace. how your smiles weren't a rare occasion but an every day blessing. today you both are barely able to sleep in the same bed together and it's just for the sake of the proof of what was the love you both had for each other, probably in the kitchen waiting for the both of you to come out.

as much as he'd grown used to the bitter feelings towards you brewing on the surface every day, he will never try and deny how perfect and beautiful you were, how in some ways you'd aged like the most delicate and perfect wine, how your taste in fashion had grown to be so chic and sophisticated, the pieces of black fabric always looking marvellous on your skin and how you'd gone from a natural lip gloss to the darker more matte lipstick you'd grown to love, accentuating your pretty and delicate face. and his favourite; how your perfect curves adapted to your nicest black pencil skirts, always hugging your waist perfectly, the jeans that you would always wear with everything in college being long forgotten. he’d grown immune to your charms, just for the sake of not feeling the pain that comes with not being able to touch you anymore.

your cold gaze towards him when you faintly notice his figure sitting on the bed behind you reminds him of a certain love that barely manages to exist, but this time around he was willing to try to set the flame alight again. he was willing to fix whatever needed to be fixed, he wanted to give back the family that was unfairly taken away from your daughter, willing to try to go back to the days where your love was a mere example that miracles of finding the right companion can happen.. and he wanted his little Hanee to see the both of his parents happy and able to stay for more than 10 minutes in the same room. he would never deny a chance of pure happiness to his dearest and most perfect creation.

that's why he mutters your name, through his croaky voice and his eyes almost closed from how tired he was and how little sleep he had gotten because of the words, pleads from his daughter last night over a shared dinner without you. little communication leads to unknown responses and different reactions, that's why you're shocked to hear his voice, and annoyed instantly because it feels like he's looking for another fight, it feels like your name doesn't belong on his tongue and he's about to scold you, and a slight angry warmth spreads through your chest.

and when you turn around to truly look at him, he knows your mind is racing at ten miles per hour and you’re probably putting your barriers up, how you’re probably ready to spit some venom at him just like the both of you got used to doing almost every day.

"what?" you ask in return, and you knit your eyebrows in the way he'd grown to absolutely hate the most. he wants to groan and maybe demand for you to drop the bitter and nasty attitude towards him because he was putting everything aside and willing to bet on the both of you again, to bet on a better future. and he wanted you beside him on the same page too. so that's why he doesn't comment on the way you’re impatiently waiting, like the seconds of your time were a privilege you were not willing to give him.

"let's have breakfast together."

you turn around once again and he has the perfect view of your freshly just made sharp curls, your silky hair shining even through the blinding lights of the vanity sitting pretty on one side of the dark room. if it were another you and another him, he would've already mentioned how pretty you look today, he'd maybe be beside you leaving a trail of kisses from your neck to your collarbones, but today the both of you were already far away and not willing to get closer, the distance between the bed and the vanity barely being enough.

you get up from your spot and the sound of your high heels are sharp and ruthless, surrounding the whole room.

"i don't have breakfast. we don't at all"

and he's aware of that. life had gotten in the way and both of your schedules were so busy and what once started as an essential and necessary ritual between the both of you, ended up being a burden. a burden you weren't willing to go through first thing in the morning, instead choosing to eat something wherever you were and depending on what the both of you were doing.

he hates having breakfast. but he risks asking anyway and it's a peace offering you simply weren't aware nor couldn't see when he mentioned it.

you pick up the expensive bag sitting pretty in one of the stray chairs around the room and get ready to leave anyways, your rejection and the hurried sounds of your jewelry being jolted around with your sharp moves feeling like a slap in his face.

you try to leave, like every morning without looking back nor saying anything, yet his reflexes are quicker than yours and his hand ends up around your forearm, stopping you from going farther.

you almost jump in the spot from the shock of feeling his touch around one of your limbs after so long, a touch you’d grown to miss very deep in your heart, and that’s why you face him with widened eyes and what was the start of a labored breath. he's tired to even pick up a fight about whatever was happening between the both of you, but he’ll still try.

"have a great day at work, yeah?" this time around his determined gaze trying to meet your eyes intimidates you, so you try to avoid it in any way possible, and you stutter for a second he was barely able to catch.

was kindness something so lost and distant between the both of you?

he lets go the second you try to free yourself from him, not giving up a fight. he looks at you fix your attire once again like he'd pinned you to the ground even if you were fine, giving you the time to recompose yourself, and he gets reminded once again of the times where quickies before work were a common thing and you'd always leave fixing your clothes with a smile in your face. how many things had he taken for granted before losing that special connection with you?

"I have a car waiting for me." you mutter and keep going towards the door of your bedroom.

he doesn't say anything back, instead drowning on the noise of the door opening and closing shortly after.

he will keep trying, his only motivation being knowing well that you still have feelings for him, just as he does for you. hatred might blind the both of you temporarily, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel he's willing to reach just for the sake of saving his family, and being able to get his first and only love back.

A/N: this is my first time writing something relatively long and i’m really nervous about posting it, so pls let me know abt your opinions hehe <3 i’m always grateful for the kind support i always get on my tiny timestamps.. so this is a huge step for me. thank you if you’re reading! <3