And I Hecking Cannot Control How Other People Will Feel About Me - Tumblr Posts
4 months ago
It's so odd. I'm looking at the unlovable tag and reblogging posts, but I feel entirely numb. I used to cry or feel sad over being undeniably unlovable and unlikable by most, but now... I guess that part of me just died. I just accepted this as a fact of life.
I suppose either I'm healing or I'm dying. I don't know if there's anything in between and, frankly, I'm somewhat wary of finding out what it could be.
Tags :
venting
self-actualization
I guess I'm finally managing to do as my therapist advised me and I'm not bothering with what I cannot control
And I hecking cannot control how other people will feel about me
Because mind you no amount of makeup and fashionable outfits or even plastic surgeries could fix a difficult and unrelatable personality
Well them's the breaks
Life is just like that I suppose
I ain't gonna be delulu about something that cannot be denied under any instance
And it's not like I can completely overhaul my very being just to try to please people (and inevitably fail because people are never please
People seek perfection while being imperfect themselves
Instead of seeking inperfection and investing in mutual improvement
(Could never apply to me for I recognize I'm way too imperfect overall but you get what I mean)
(I'd rather improve alone than be a burden to those who consider themselves less imperfect than me)
(Keywords here being 'consider themselves' because let's be honest if you relate to me at all you're looking at a broken mirror)
(A broken mirror which may be [paradoxically speaking] painfully accurate and mustn't be stared for too long I assume)