Arno Victor Dorian - Tumblr Posts

A little rant...okay I got carried away so it's kinda long... apologies divine readers

Am I the only one that has noticed a rather....toxic pattern in Assassin's Creed romantic relationships?

In Unity the "relationship" between Arno and Elise is...very one sided when I take a deeper look at it. I'ma be fr here...I hated her character. I didn't revel in her death, but the game certainly felt more enjoyable without her presence and without Arno's lovesick puppy act of following her around.

She didn't stand up for him or even question the accusation of him being framed for her father Francois' murder. No 'Hey I know Arno. I love him. I trust him and I know he did not kill my father' or anything. She LEFT HIM TO ROT IN THE BASTILLE??? QUOI?? I AM CONFUSION. She was mad at him for not going after Germain because he wanted to PROTECT HER because he LOVES HER - when they got the chance to meet and kill him again later. And then THE BIG ONE - she abandoned him under that rubble to take Germain on by herself. All she had to do was take a few extra seconds to free Arno, they could have fought him together, and maybe - JUST MAYBE - she wouldn't have died. And it's not just that either it's the leaving him under that rubble for me. She was supposed to 'love him' and she left him under something that was hurting and trapping him? If it were me, I wouldn't stop until he was free Germain be damned. I will free my baguette boy and then we ferry onward to glory!

It seemed like a lecherous kind of situation where Arno gave and gave, and Elise just took and took. I felt like she hardcore used him because she knew how much he loved her, and she fully used that to her advantage. Maybe she did it on purpose, maybe it was unintentional but either way...it had me shaking my head and waving my red flag like I was in the color guard.

The same thing occurs again in Origins with Bayek and Aya. Bayek seems to love Aya a whole lot more than she loves him, and I even get the vibe that she just stayed with him because she got pregnant. I mean...she rejected his proposal because SHE wanted to go back to Alexandria to follow her dreams, SHE didn't want to be the wife of a Medjay, she was what I believe could be termed an 'absent mother' as Bayek spent more time with Khemu than she appeared to, and then she left Bayek to go off on her own and they wound up separated for a year not too long after their son's death. Bayek had to grieve alone while she seemed to just...refuse to grieve. It was strange. She never wanted to discuss Khemu even though Bayek was emotionally available for her to do so (which I loved about him because most men don't do the 'emotionally available' thing as they think it makes them seem weak). The one time I remember in the game when Bayek said that he wished not to be separated from her again after Khemu's death, she shut him up with sex...and then left again not too long after that. Then she eventually separated (read: pretty much divorced him imo) from him to go do her own thing in Rome. I mean...it certainly benefitted the Brotherhood in the long run...but it seems to me like she ran from her grief, left Bayek behind, shut herself down to all discussion of Bayek and then she even changed her identity. Reference to the Aya - Amunet transformation.

Their relationship was just tragic overall to me and the shutting down a conversation with sex, was a major red flag to me that their relationship was not going to survive the death of their son. I do think that Aya had...a type of love for Bayek. A fondness. A feeling of loyalty and a high-level trust. But I do not think for a second that Aya loved Bayek as much as Bayek loved her. Man would have gone to hell and back for her.

Why is the 'men being absolutely whipped for a woman who doesn't appreciate them' a recurring thing in the Assassin's Creed games?

I know I probably read WAAAYY too much into this but as someone who's bigtime into psychology I just - OOF. These were not some healthy fully functioning relationships. And I did not care for either of them in the long run.

Arno deserved better as did Bayek. I think they're both sweethearts - that each have their own faults and flaws of course because they're human beings - but they deserved more.

Head cannons bc I can - Assassin’s body parts preferences (and extras...)

AN: I would just like to say that ALL of the Assassin's will protect their love with their lives, not standing for any disrespect or rudeness toward her in any way shape or form. I may not have put it in the description of every Assassin, but it goes without saying. ALSO, plz don't @ me bc this is my first ever spicy post lol

Altair Ibn La’Ahad - loves burying his face in her neck and grabbing her backside cheekily lol, loves bathing with her but won’t deny that’s it’s hard to control himself around her naked body. Comes to her after a mission (if they didn't go on it together that is or if she's not an assassin) to hold her and just melts against her, grateful to have her and be back in her arms alive. Pulls her away ever so often to a corner where he'll kiss her breathless and then just walk off like nothing happened (this man-), loves to chase lol if she runs from him, it sets something deep and primal off in him, and when he eventually catches her? 😳😳😳

Shay Patrick Cormac - definitely breasts lol and has a thing for waists, also loves thighs & has a thing for kissing from the top of her foot to the inside of her thighs, this man can pick up grown soldiers, flip them over his shoulder and then just toss them to the ground like it nothing so he’s strong - tell.me he doesn’t pick up his love and carry her off for some alone time. She won't have to worry about anyone on the Morrigan getting any ideas because Shay has made it VERY clear that she's his and his only. He'll legit fight for her if someone makes her uncomfortable or harasses her and make them regret the day they were born (that is if they can even think afterward bc they'll probably be dead). It - depending on the mood he's in - makes him feel very loved and cared for or very turned on and ready to pin her down, when she kisses the scar over his eye. Don't even get me started on how naughty this fricken man is in Irish Gaelic. (Sir! Control thyself!)

Edward Kenway - an ass man for sure and he loves the thighs too, stands behind her and glares at anyone who checks her out from his spot behind her where he’ll press a possessive kiss to her shoulder while glaring at them. Why do I have feeling that this man has a thing for women who can shoot guns? If she shoots a gun in front of him all pirate-esque he'll literally beg her to step on him haha. Loves him a mouthy feisty woman because not only does it turn.him.on, he gets a kick out of a lovely woman being able to blow someone out of the water with her insults & statements of self-defense. Will also waylay anyone who disrespects her, he'll actually feed them their teeth (don't test him with her)

Jacob Ethan Frye - both the man’s bi lol he can have both if he wants, he for sure does playful butt pats and grabs occasionally but usually when they’re alone (USUALLY & if a Rook bore witness? THEY SAW NOTHING), definitely into holding his love on his lap and whispering dirty things in her ear to fluster her. Will fight to protect her and God help them because they'll have him and the Rooks to deal with (that is if Jacob doesn't crush them and turn them into dust that blows away in the wind lol). Also loves him a feisty and mouthy woman, if she's sarcastic, witty and goofy on top of that? This man is more whipped than whipped cream. Total gentleman even if she can hand his ass to him on a silver platter, he still treats her with utmost respect. Enjoys lying in bed with her and cuddling (give the man all the cuddles STAT) lazily playing with her hair and believe it not - not all kissing with the amorous assassin leads to *wink wink*. He genuinely enjoys laying there with her on a slow day and kissing her sweetly, over and over again. Man is a genuine romantic sweetheart (and nothing will change my mind). It's not an odd occurrence for Evie to wonder where her younger brother is, only to find him conked out on his love's chest just peacefully snoozing away as she holds him reading a book or some files. Totally see him tracing his fingers down her sternum until he reaches her breasts and tracing the insides of them to get her riled up (if he's feeling mean he'll even give a cheeky kiss haha). Also loves to chase her across rooftops and make bets of a spicier nature...

Evie Frye - loves to kiss her loves hands & jaw (particularly that one little spot…) and trace kisses down her sternum, has a habit of cornering her and making out with her lol then she just goes on about her day like nothing happened, plays footsies underneath table surfaces (CHANGE MY MIND). Loves all of her and honestly don't think she would have a preference, Evie's just grateful to have her at all and be with her. Woman was dedicated to being alone as a result of being in the Brotherhood. Think she would get a kick out of witty and playful banter, the more her love speaks the more in love she falls and the more she desires her. She's good with her hands. I said it. Sue me. She.has.good.hands. The woman tis skilled (in more ways than one...) This also pertains to corsets and buttons whether it be doing them or undoing them... Kind think she would like chasing her love through the city too and if it ends up in a garden? The woman internally swoons.

Kassandra of Sparta - breasts she likes pulling her love against her and then looking down to see them pressed against her armor being gorgeous as usual and she loves to grab hips, she will CUT Alcibiades if he looks at her love lol bc she KNOWS what he's thinking about, only lets her hair down around her love and adores laying in between her thighs while her fingers give her a head a very relaxing massage (seriously they can put the woman to sleep lol)

Ratonhnhake:ton/Connor Kenway - I think we can all agree that this sweet man isn't very sexual BUT once he settles down, he does have an appreciation for his loves figure. Loves to hover over her from behind and kiss the top of her head, and when things get more intimate between them, he loves to give her kisses all over her face. Flowers with him would be a common occurrence, often times she wakes up to beautiful wildflowers on her bedside table or on the pillow beside her. This man is a good provider. And if she takes an interest in hunting with him, more than a few times he'll briefly lose interest in hunting the animal and playfully hunting her instead... Feel like he strokes her legs lovingly and takes his time exploring the sexual feelings he has for her. He would love her breasts because they're beautiful, soft and full of life.

Alexios of Sparta - ass for sure he seems like a butt smacker haha she’ll be minding her own business when he comes out of nowhere and gives her a light loving smack. He comes up behind her and literally sweeps her off her feet - no pleasantries, just "you're mine now" lol

Haytham Kenway - breasts has a thing for tracing the tops of them when she wears dresses to get her riled up all while delivering an “innocent” kiss to her flaming red cheek, will randomly stoop to her level to whisper something 😳 in her ear. Get a vibe that he would spoil her with beautiful jewelry and then woo her until it's the only thing she has on, before taking her to bed... Morning sex seems like the norm for him because he's not always there when she falls asleep arriving home late, but when he sees her in the morning, he more than makes it up to her and greets her in very steamy manner. He reminds her to remain neutral when she stands next to him during a meeting as he sits down with his hand hidden by her dress on her backside gently squeezing and acting completely casual about it the cheeky -

Desmond Miles - breasts & when Shaun stresses him out, he presses his head into them lol it’s stress relieving, comes up behind her and hugs her tightly, definitely into spooning he likes the physical contact, and he melts when she kisses his forehead. Before everything he screwed, but now with the woman he loves? He makes love and thoroughly enjoys every second of it with her. Having her by his side through everything means more to him than he can express.

Arno Victor Dorian - this man feels like a worshipper he would love all of her body and take his time with her, but he does tend to go for breasts more coming out of nowhere and kissing the tops of them reverently throughout the day, definitely takes her hand in his and kisses it with full eye contact to the point where it makes her blush, earning a chuckle from him. Tell me that this man doesn't pull her away to corners throughout the day or on a mission and kiss her before walking away casually like nothing happened lol. Got a feeling he's very into whisking his love away just getting her attention and pulling her away to wherever they can have a few moments alone together. Good kisser. I refuse to believe anything else. He swoops in gives a sweet kiss that leaves her flustered, and he stands there watching her with a smile on his face. For some reason I think he's into the whole secret lover rendezvous thing, aka coming in through his love's window or meeting her secretly (it's exciting and he gets her all alone...)

Ezio Auditore Da Firenze - also feels like a worshipping type of man except everywhere, everything, all the time lol, but he does have a preference for breasts often times hugging his love around the waist and burying his face in them. We've all seen how this man has thing for pinning his lady to the wall...do with it what you will. But he does it to her and OFTEN lol. A little more promiscuous in public - stopping of course if she gets uncomfortable - than others and is not afraid to show how he feels about her. Also, a good kisser. I mean COME ON.

Bayek of Siwa - he loves her breasts because beneath them lies her heart and he cherishes the fact that she has given it to him, loves to star gaze with her - they lay there together peacefully as he tells her about the constellations and their meaning. Loves bathing with her just laying back and relaxing, eyes roving her form as she cleans him and gives him a shave (he refuses to shave unless she does it for him bc he loves her touch and how great her handiwork is). Gives the kinds of kisses that melt her like a stick of butter lol, a kiss from him has a lot of emotion poured into it telling without words how much he loves her.

Assassin's Creed Characters height... versus mine - Part 1

A/N: I am 5’7 and three quarters to be exact but they never take the other part into account so I get rounded into the 5’7 category lollll

Jacob Frye is said to 5'6 (although he's head cannoned to be taller). Cannot believe that I’m a little taller than my dream man but I LOVE MY SHORT KING. Who says you need to be tall to be a sexy sweetheart that everyone falls in love with?!

Evie Frye is said to be 5'6. Gotta love how she's considered "short", but she'll hand your ass to you on a silver platter and call it a regular Fryeday (am I right?) I’m taller than Evie which makes hugging her around the shoulders easy peasy!!

Arno Victor Dorian is said to be 6'0. We love our tall teddy bear baguette man.

Desmond Miles is said to be 6'0 tall as he's eye to eye with Altair and Ezio two of his ancestors. This man needs a million hugs and then some 🥹😩😭

Altair Ibn La'Ahad is said to be 6'0 (and we know that the man has long legs confirmed LOL). Imagine 6’0 of Altair coming at you in a dark alley… YIKES!!

Ezio Auditore da Firenze is said to be 6'0 (It fits, no? I mean anyone who looks at him can tell that he's very well built...) Strong as an Italian Gondola

Ratonhnhake:ton/Connor Kenway is said to be 6'4 (sometimes 6'2) but it's a known fact that he is the largest assassin in the franchise. Man is built like a BEAR. A BRICK BEAR.

Edward Kenway I've heard is roughly 5'9. Good height for a pirate he probably scared the crap out of the other pirates (bc they were typically malnourished due to all the time at sea and didn’t grow very tall from what I’ve read)

Haytham Kenway is said to be 6'0. What did they feed him growing up?! LOL

Shay Patrick Cormac is said to be 6'0. Not surprised the Irish have always been of good stock. Love this Irish penguin haha 😂

Celebrating Arno's Birthday

Her sneaking out of bed to fix him some breakfast and bringing it to him in bed. He woke up and worried about where she was, instantly reaching over to her place in the bed to hold her but finding an empty and vaguely warm spot. His panic was eased when she came through the doors and smiled at him, instantly making him happy.

His love learning how to sing 'Happy Birthday' in French to him to help wake him up the morning of his birthday. It brings a ridiculously adorable sleepy and happy smile from the French assassin, and he hugs her tightly pulling her down to his chest in affectionate thanks.

Baking this man a cake! I think he would like chocolate (or honestly, he would be so flattered if his love baked him an entire cake that he wouldn't care what flavor it was he would love it!)

Idk why but I'm into knitting so I'm going with it...knitting Arno some socks haha. He deserves them! But with how France tends to have rainfall on the high side throughout the year, personally I worry about him getting his boots wet, and having cold, wet feet which will lead to him getting sick. Soooo NOT happening! He needs lots of socks so when he comes home, those socks get changed and he gets warm!

Repairing his weapons if they need it. Sharpening his cutlass sword (not like that ya dirty minded nasties), cleaning his pistol (oh my gosh...I'm setting myself up with these lol) and sewing any buttons that have been lost back onto his coat/replacing them. Stocking the Phantom Blade with poison darts so he's ready to kick bahookie when fighting time comes.

Write him a love letter and he's the kind of man who will carry it in his coat pocket right over his heart. Just tell him how much you love and appreciate him, how you'll always be there for him, and how though you worry about him as an assassin you trust that he'll always come back to her.

Choosing a flattering colors of fabric to turn into numerous new cravats for him (he looks VERY dashing in red and blue we already know). Perhaps a green one to compliment his Pantene commercial hair 😂 and chocolate brown eyes. A cream one that goes well with his dark blue coat.

I love the idea of a personalized cravat pin for him. Perhaps something with his initials carved into it, or a loving saying from her in French 🥺🥹🥺, with a stone that compliments his eyes (like amber, emerald or ruby).

Giving him a portrait of lover's eyes (legit what they sound like - back then they carried small portraits of their lover's eyes with them). Including the little beauty mark under her right eye just on her cheekbone, which he loves to kiss and stroke with his thumb.

Giving him a massage either on his shoulders and back or his head. Or both. He loves it when she plays with his hair, whether it's carding her fingers through his hair or braiding it lol. He loves the time she spends touching him and how much her touch relaxes him as he just lays there like a lazy cat on her lap, soaking her attention up.

Believe that he would enjoy lying in bed with her as they drink hot chocolate just having a lazy day together. He also particularly enjoys her presence next to him in just a chemise...extra points if she has her stockings on because she's cold. They'll talk about anything and everything or just lay together in comfortable silence, holding hands as he holds her legs in his lap rubbing her shins and calves.

Highly believe that he would enjoy her reading to him. Perhaps Dream of the Red Chamber by Cao Xuequin (pub. 1761) aka the Chinese version of Romeo and Juliet. Camilla by France Burney (pub. 1796) or Celestina by Charlotte Smith (pub. 1791).

This lovely man does not require birthday sex. He's just happy to have her with him and in his life because he could be completely alone. He's more than content to hold you in his arms and spend the day with her talking, kissing, and enjoying her company.

If she does however decide to give him a little something 'extra' expect a lot of blushing and giggling coming from the bedroom until the wee hours of the morning 😉😏😳.