Toxic Love - Tumblr Posts

A certain soon redeemed villain character is going to come back, i wonder who it is 🤔

Am: Dolliee

21

Blog: vent blog/rambling.

Dms open/asks open

Anons: 🔎, 🌊

Extra: I made this blog to love love. I am not in love with anyone so I'm trying to cope!

Hey! Did you ever finish that doofus and Louie drawing?

Sadly, I didn't. Well, I just forgot about it, but now that I got reminded, I might finish it in free time, but also, it's not like I didn't do anything with it i just might fuck it up a little, I'm not great with paint

But then I got my computer and drawing tablet and tried to do it on that, but after a while, I lost motivation and just left It. I feel horrible now for forgetting (being to lazy) to finish it TnT

So I hope I will bring back my motivation and complete it one day

Thank you very much for the ask♡

SAVAGE LOVE

I'm a lover of all things BTS and when they released the remix with Jason Derulo i was so excited not because i liked the original song. I had never heard it actually but because i really loved all the vocals on this tracks blended together. JD, JK, Suga, JHope everyone was just amazing.

I just wanted to talk about the meaning of the song though because like everything BTS they all relay a deeper meaning behind the vocals and sweet melody. Talking about how you can use me, eventhough you don't want me because i can not let you go. I found out you are dating me as a revenge plan for your ex and stuff. You don't give a what when we kissing and stuff.

Please!!!!

If i find out someone was doing that to me i ain't staying for that toxic love. I realised the guy i once dated was heartbroken by his ex girlfriend because he was once poor. So he just started using women after that. I had no idea and here i come an innocent girl trying to be bad for the first time. I had learnt to masturbate for the first time like 2 months before i visited this guy. Still i had not orgasmed. Well i was a virgin and had no idea what an orgasn felt like tbh.

So this guy then had sex with me and decided i was not his idea of a virgin because i did not bleed and did not discuss with me. So he started using me for sex without discussing it with me. All along i thought we would get married. Until he organized an outing with his friends and introduced me as his friend and introduced another girl as his "girlfriend" then he said "nope i cant say that really, maybe friends with benefits, that is the correct term" and they laughed. I was gutted. 🥺😭😭

I clearly heard the message and being faraway from home i just packed my bags and decided i was done and went back on my way. Its so sad though it still took me another 3 or 4 sexual encounters after that to eventually let go of that relationship completely. But i would never be able to let someone use me ever again. Knowing they have issues from their past relationship is a red flag and issa cause for me to run for cover, been burnt, ouch!!!!

I really do not regret having sex with him for I really learnt a lot from that experience. I almost killed myself too. I took 16 pills and tried to sleep and never wake up but God woke me up 😀😀😀 and i guess its something i will never try ever again. However if i were to do it all over again i would do it differently this time. I will never date the same guys i dated and i will take my time and be a totally different person this time around.

I will always want to count myself lucky and blessed that i did not get any infections f4om that loser for he insisted on not using protection and stuff🥺🙄🙄🙄 i was whipped and dumb and stupid now that i look back i see that I can not believe i was ever that kind of person. Grace covered and protected me i guess.

I hope someone gets encouraged by my stupid story filled with stupid decisions.....

As always i will keep holding on...

Until then 💋💋💋🤗🤗🤗

I always took morsels from men & treasured them like flecks of pure gold. They filled me up with the glittery golden liquid joy of being special, being wanted, being loved. I felt like a princess being bestowed with an effervescent tiara, perched on his lap.

I felt like I was temporarily lifted out of the gray, choppy waters of constant fear that something was wrong with me, the murky haze of sadness that didn't seem to have a beginning or an end. I felt sparkly and beautiful when I was blessed with morsels.

When he’d look at me under the moonlight, pressed up against his worn-out, faded blue car, & ask me “how are you so pretty?” I’d forget every hour he’s left my messages unresponded to. I was his special girl again. Nothing could ever be wrong. I know it sounds pathetic. But at that moment I had more than enough.

I'm tired of toxic men being romanticized.

I'm not going to name characters because

A. This applies to all media (books, video games, movies, comics, TV shows, and music.) I'm calling out the toxic tropes/harmful messages portrayed as a whole. If the shoe fits, it probably does. I'm not writing this with one character in mind. Rather the constant characterization of toxic men bring redeemable and worthy of being romantizied.

B. I don't feel like getting harassed. Some people feel very strongly about their favorite character and that's ok. But it's not ok when people are attacked by fans for trying to look at the character through a media literacy lens. Also people are free to have opinions and hate/dislike a character. I have favorite characters that people hate, are evil, or just vibe with that others don't. As long as we can all be respectful towards the critics and fans, we should be able to create a healthy discussion.

With all that said, I hate the constant romantization of abusive, emotionally distant, dangerous, violent, and assaulting men. It's very common for heterosexual and sometimes gay relationships portrayed in media. It's more common in hetro relationships compared to gay but I rarely see the same kind of troped in media with lesbian relationships. I can think of hundreds problematic Hetero examples, about 10 gay couples, and only a few bad lesbian relationships.

This typically falls on the male love interest. There doesn't seem to be a equivalent rate of toxic portrays on the female love interest.

I'm not against showing toxic relationships as long as they are not romantized. But it seems almost all hot fictional male characters seem to be assholes who have a tragic backstory. From bad boys with daddy issues, to vilians of cosmic proportion, to Mafia bosses, princes, and heirs, everything is a trauma response. He's stalking you? Well he lost his first love so its just him being protective. He's yelling? He grew up in a home where he didn't feel heard. He's hitting you? He didn't mean too, you just annoyed him. He assults you? Oops, you were just so tempting. He couldn't help himself.

As a AFAB person, I find this to be completely horrifying. It's not just in dark romances, it's in all media. These toxic men are constantly being coddled, justified, and protected as "just a fantasy". Well, these fantasies contribute to rape culture, victim blaming, and the normalization of abuse.

When we criticize male authors writing women in a harmful few of the male gaze, it's because we recognize that when young men see women constantly portrayed as submissive, weak, sexual conquests, and in conforming to misogynistic ideals, we understand that this will influence how these young men will treat their future female peers, girlfriends, and wives.

We recognize the constant sexist and sexual objecification of women harms women because it reinforces harmful messages to men about how a woman should act and what to expect when a woman acts out of line.

So why as soon as someone points out how toxic a male character is, it's met with disgust, accusations of being a incell, and anti feminist? Especially when it's a booktok love interest, many object that it's sexist to critize women loved media.

Women deserve to have healthy relationships! Bob and Linda from Bob's Burgers. Philp and Claire from Modern Family. Jake and Amy from Brooklyn 99. Why can't we push push these types of relationships more? Where we show how healthy people resolve conflict, how love is supposed to be supported, and especially let's show how men should respect women in relationships.

Young Women viewing these "dark romances" will internalize these harmful messages and this will affect their relationships. If it's normal for most romances to portray men as violent, aggressive, and disrespectful, then young women will accept this as a norm. It harms the plight of women as these stories continue to reinforce harmful misogynistic messages. Women deserve better.

“I don’t need you.”

It sounded less grounded than the villain had wanted it to. It sounded like something someone had told them to say, and they were just repeating it with half hearted determination. They said it again, “I don’t need you.”

“No,” the hero agreed. They were grinning. “You don’t.”

The villain floundered. They, in all honesty, wanted a fight. To prove something, they supposed. That they really didn’t need the hero. That they weren’t in the wrong, here. “What?”

“I said,” the hero said slowly, and the beginnings of a grin curled at the edges of their mouth. “You don’t need me.”

“I don’t need you,” the villain repeated, and the hero nodded encouragingly. It just made the villain want to hit them.

The hero lounged against the doorframe, halfway in and halfway out of their apartment. And truly, that was the worst bit of it all—the hero wasn’t showing up outside the villain’s house, or driving by the villain’s work to see if they truly looked happier without them. But the villain was.

They wanted to scream, and kick, and throw plates onto the ground.

‘Leave me alone.’

But they couldn’t say that, because the hero had. They had cut contact and blocked numbers and ignored the villain’s car as it went by. Still, the villain felt haunted. As if they would never be clean of the hero, parts of their soul forever dirtied by it all.

The hero’s smile, and the way their voice sounded when they knew the villain would cave to their wishes.

They just wanted the hero to—

“Leave me alone.” It slipped out against their better judgement. From the way the hero’s grin widened, they knew it had been the worst thing they could have said.

“Darling, I have,” the hero said, their tone saccharine. Pitying. “You’re the one outside of my apartment.”

It felt like being burned alive, the frustration of it. The way it rose in their chest but had nowhere to go, leaving them shaking with nothing and everything trapped under their tongue.

“That’s not what I meant and you know that—“

“What, you miss me that bad? I thought you—“

“Shut up,” the villain snapped. The hero raised an eyebrow.

“It’s eating you alive, isn’t it?” They sounded pleased.

“It’s not,” the villain protested.

“I told you, you don’t need me.”

“I know,” the villain grit out.

“But you want me.”

Something in the villain’s brain stalled.

“Excuse me?”

“You don’t need me. You never have,” the hero said it like it was a fact. “You want me, though. Even as the sound of my name burns you, and the memory of me rots in your mouth, you’re going to want me.”

“You’re wrong.”

“Am I?” The hero’s voice dropped to a whisper. “You can go out to every bar in this city, kiss a hundred people who look like me and get just drunk enough to forget you’re not mine anymore—but you’re never going to stop missing me.”

The hero knew, of course they did, how hard the villain had tried to forget it entirely. The disaster they had become trying to be clean again.

“No matter how many shots you take to block out the memory of me, you’ll always be mine.”

“You’re insane,” the villain finally managed. The hero simply tipped their head to the side in acknowledgement. “That’s not-what’s wrong with you—“

“You’re the one who misses me.”

It stung, deep in the villain’s stomach. It took them too long to remember how to breathe—too long after that to think of what to say.

“If I’m lucky, I won’t ever have to see you again,” their voice quivered, slightly. “But knowing us, the next time we meet it will be in hell.”

The hero laughed and closed the door in their face.

The villain blocked them. Avoided the side of town the worked in. Moved three cities over.

It didn’t matter.

The villain could still feel the hero under their skin.

Later, whenever someone would ask, “Have you ever been haunted?”

The villain would think back to the hero.

And say, “Yes.”

hehe

Humiliation

A/n: this is my first Kaiser fanfic ;-; (traumatizing him a lil more)

tw: toxic relationship, just a little hitting, manipulation

You pressed your fingernails into your skin, leaving vivid red marks that contrasted sharply against your arm. Heat flooded your face as laughter echoed around you. Kaiser stood beside you, a smug smirk on his lips, reveling in the attention that surrounded him.

You fought to keep your composure, rage simmering just beneath the surface, ready to explode. 

But for now, you forced a smile, determined to wear your humiliation like a badge of honor, absorbing the moment like a sponge drenched in a relentless downpour.

Until you get home with Kaiser.

And as you stepped through the front door, the facade shattered. You tossed your bag aside, heart racing as the floodgates opened.

“Do you think this is funny, Kaiser?” you snapped, your voice echoing through the empty hallway. “Laughing at me like I’m some kind of joke?”

He leaned against the wall, arms crossed, that infuriating smirk still plastered on his face. “Oh come on, it was just a bit of fun. You’re being too dramatic.”

“Dramatic?” You advanced on him, fists clenched at your sides. “You don’t get to decide what’s dramatic when you’re the one making a spectacle out of me! It’s humiliating. You make it sound like I’m just supposed to take it!”

Kaiser shrugged, that annoying nonchalance grating on your nerves. “People laugh. It’s what they do.”

“People laugh because you make it easy for them! And you turn everything into a game!” Each word felt like a release, the pent-up frustration spilling over. “You think you’re the star of the show, but all you do is make me feel small. You don’t even care how it affects me!”

In a surge of anger, you slapped him. The sound reverberated through the room, and for a moment, his expression shifted from smug to shock. You saw the flicker of vulnerability in his eyes, and a rush of satisfaction surged through you.

“Why do you always have to make it about you?” you pressed, stepping closer. “You think it’s all fun and games, but your jokes cut deeper than you realize.”

He cowered against the wall, breathless and wide-eyed. “No, please..I didn’t mean to-”

“No, but you do,” you interrupted, your voice low and purposeful. “You don’t think about anyone but yourself. Maybe this will teach you a lesson.”

His gaze darted around, as if searching for an escape, but you weren’t done yet. “You know, I could tell everyone how you really are-how insecure you are behind that facade. Wouldn’t it be a shame if they knew the truth?”

“Please don’t,” he said, a tremor in his voice.

“Why not? You think this is all just a game?” You leaned in closer, your tone softening just enough to draw him in. “I can be your worst nightmare or your greatest ally. It’s your choice.”

He swallowed hard, and you could see the gears turning in his mind, calculating. You reveled in the power shifting between you, the realization that he was no longer the one in control.

“Just remember,” you continued, “I’m done being your punchline. If you want to keep your little secrets safe, you’ll think twice before making me the subject of your awful jokes again.”

The silence hung heavy, and for a moment, he seemed to consider your words…

You pull your face close to his and whispered “Now, how about we start over?” a sly smile creeping onto your lips. “You can be the charming Kaiser, and I’ll be the one who calls the shots.”

He nodded slowly, his eyes widening in fear. A sheen of sweat glistened on his brow, and his hands trembled slightly.

Love with Kaiser is like a drug, once you get addicted you both can never stop… until it's too late. 

Emptiness was soaking through my clothes

Keeping me on the chair by the dinner table

Full of books,

Full of notes

The ground was not to be seen

It swallowed and swallowed yet there was no end to this misery

My mind froze, unable to comprehend what was going on

My eyes were searching, any option would do

My hands tried to move but it was futile

With every fibre of my being I was protesting for hours on end

But the hollowness had already surrounded me

Taunting me, waiting for me to give in

My own memories turned against me

Remembering actions and occurrences and trying to find a solution within

A solution I cannot accept

The walls were quietly listening to the spectacle

My suffering was their delight

I was in a forest perhaps

The trees were looking at me with pity

Of course, they wouldn't understand anything

Their comprehension was far beyond mine

Like everyone elses

Slowly my head became a brooding place for the wights of hopelessness

Confind to the chair they gave me my destiny

Give up

Emptiness was soaking through my clothes

Keeping me on the chair by the dinner table

Full of books,

Full of notes

The ground was not to be seen

It swallowed and swallowed yet there was no end to this misery

My mind froze, unable to comprehend what was going on

My eyes were searching, any option would do

My hands tried to move but it was futile

With every fibre of my being I was protesting for hours on end

But the hollowness had already surrounded me

Taunting me, waiting for me to give in

My own memories turned against me

Remembering actions and occurrences and trying to find a solution within

A solution I cannot accept

The walls were quietly listening to the spectacle

My suffering was their delight

I was in a forest perhaps

The trees were looking at me with pity

Of course, they wouldn't understand anything

Their comprehension was far beyond mine

Like everyone elses

Slowly my head became a brooding place for the wights of hopelessness

Confind to the chair they gave me my destiny

Give up

Emptiness was soaking through my clothes

Keeping me on the chair by the dinner table

Full of books,

Full of notes

The ground was not to be seen

It swallowed and swallowed yet there was no end to this misery

My mind froze, unable to comprehend what was going on

My eyes were searching, any option would do

My hands tried to move but it was futile

With every fibre of my being I was protesting for hours on end

But the hollowness had already surrounded me

Taunting me, waiting for me to give in

My own memories turned against me

Remembering actions and occurrences and trying to find a solution within

A solution I cannot accept

The walls were quietly listening to the spectacle

My suffering was their delight

I was in a forest perhaps

The trees were looking at me with pity

Of course, they wouldn't understand anything

Their comprehension was far beyond mine

Like everyone elses

Slowly my head became a brooding place for the wights of hopelessness

Confind to the chair they gave me my destiny

Give up

Emptiness was soaking through my clothes

Keeping me on the chair by the dinner table

Full of books,

Full of notes

The ground was not to be seen

It swallowed and swallowed yet there was no end to this misery

My mind froze, unable to comprehend what was going on

My eyes were searching, any option would do

My hands tried to move but it was futile

With every fibre of my being I was protesting for hours on end

But the hollowness had already surrounded me

Taunting me, waiting for me to give in

My own memories turned against me

Remembering actions and occurrences and trying to find a solution within

A solution I cannot accept

The walls were quietly listening to the spectacle

My suffering was their delight

I was in a forest perhaps

The trees were looking at me with pity

Of course, they wouldn't understand anything

Their comprehension was far beyond mine

Like everyone elses

Slowly my head became a brooding place for the wights of hopelessness

Confind to the chair they gave me my destiny

Give up

They say that one should change its environment if they want to be different

Staying in a toxic household will not help you heal

But what if you're not able to move or leave that place?

To leave an island, you have to row in the anker that's weighing the boat down

If the anker is too heavy and my body too weak what will happen then?

Am I doomed to stay?

They say that one should change its environment if they want to be different

Staying in a toxic household will not help you heal

But what if you're not able to move or leave that place?

To leave an island, you have to row in the anker that's weighing the boat down

If the anker is too heavy and my body too weak what will happen then?

Am I doomed to stay?

They say that one should change its environment if they want to be different

Staying in a toxic household will not help you heal

But what if you're not able to move or leave that place?

To leave an island, you have to row in the anker that's weighing the boat down

If the anker is too heavy and my body too weak what will happen then?

Am I doomed to stay?

The Narcissist's Masquerade

In love's twisted labyrinth, shadows conspire,

A false Cupid, cloaked in dark attire.

With whispers sweet and arrows of black,

He ensnares hearts, never looking back.

Beneath his mask of angelic guise,

Lurks a soul consumed by cunning lies.

His words, like daggers, cut deep and cold,

Leaving wounds that never grow old.

He weaves a web of manipulation's art,

Playing with emotions, tearing souls apart.

Each vow of love, a twisted refrain,

Leading lovers to sorrow, to endless pain.

His arrows pierce, not with love's sweet kiss,

But with venomous poison, leaving hearts amiss.

He twists and turns, with deceitful grace,

Leaving behind a bitter, empty space.

Beware the Cupid with wings of night,

For his love is but a poisonous blight.

In his embrace, there's only despair,

A haunting echo of a love unfair.

Free At Last

The morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a gentle glow across my room. I lay there for a moment, savoring the quiet, the stillness, the absence of dread. For the first time in a long while, I felt at peace. This was freedom, a feeling I had almost forgotten.

My journey to this point was anything but smooth. For years, I had been ensnared in a web of toxic relationships that had drained my energy and distorted my sense of self. Friends who thrived on drama, a partner whose every word was a calculated blow to my self-esteem, and family members who viewed my boundaries as a personal affront. Each day felt like a battle for survival, where merely getting through was the goal.

The decision to cut these people out of my life didn’t come easy. It was a gradual realization, creeping in through the cracks of countless sleepless nights and anxiety-ridden days. I remember staring at my reflection one evening, the weight of constant stress etched into my features. That’s when I knew something had to change. I couldn't keep living in survival mode.

The process was painful. There were heated arguments, accusations, and tears. My phone buzzed less and less as I distanced myself from those who brought nothing but negativity into my life. At times, the silence was deafening, and I questioned whether I was doing the right thing. Was it really worth the isolation?

But slowly, as the days turned into weeks, I began to notice a change. The constant tightness in my chest started to loosen. I no longer woke up dreading the day ahead. Instead, I felt a growing sense of lightness, of possibility. I began to reclaim pieces of myself that had been lost in the chaos.

I started each day with a simple ritual: a cup of tea on my porch, watching the world come alive. No rush, no immediate demands. Just me, my thoughts, and the soft morning breeze. I rediscovered hobbies I had abandoned—hiking, reading, writing—and found joy in these small, quiet moments. They were mine, untouched by the toxicity that had once consumed my life.

I found myself laughing more, genuinely enjoying conversations with new friends who brought positivity and support into my life. These relationships were based on mutual respect and understanding, not manipulation or control. It was a stark contrast to what I had known, and it felt like stepping into the sunlight after years spent in a dark room.

One evening, as I sat on a park bench watching the sunset, I realized just how far I had come. The vibrant colors painted across the sky felt like a celebration of my newfound freedom. I was no longer in survival mode, constantly bracing for the next attack. I was living, truly living, and it was a revelation.

In this new space, free from toxic influences, I could breathe. I could dream again, set goals, and work towards them without the constant drag of negativity pulling me down. I learned to trust myself, to value my own worth, and to surround myself with people who uplifted and inspired me.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a golden glow over everything, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude. I had fought hard to remove the toxicity from my life, and the reward was more than I had ever imagined. I was no longer a prisoner to the demands and manipulations of others. I was free to be myself, to pursue my dreams, and to live a life that was truly my own.

For the first time, I understood what it meant to thrive, not just survive. I had reclaimed my life from those who sought to control it, and in doing so, I had discovered a world of possibilities. This was my life, and I intended to live it fully, joyfully, and without apology.

The Fragile Thread: Can Trust Be Restored After Betrayal?

Can trust be restored once it's broken, or is it forever damaged? This question lingers in the hearts and minds of many who have experienced betrayal. Trust, the fragile thread that binds relationships, can be ripped to pieces in an instant but takes a lifetime to build. When that bond is broken, the pain and disillusionment can feel insurmountable, leading one to wonder if the pieces can ever be put back together.

Rebuilding trust requires immense effort from both parties. It demands honesty, transparency, and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths. The one who broke the trust must show genuine remorse and a commitment to change, while the one who was betrayed must find the strength to forgive and the patience to rebuild. This process is neither quick nor easy; it is fraught with setbacks and requires continuous effort and reassurance.

However, some believe that once trust is broken, it can never truly be restored. The shadow of doubt lingers, and the fear of being hurt again can overshadow any attempts at reconciliation. The relationship, though it may continue, is forever altered, marked by an invisible scar that serves as a constant reminder of the past. Trust, once lost, might be irreparably damaged, leaving both parties to navigate a new, uncertain dynamic.

Ultimately, whether trust can be fully restored or remains forever fractured depends on the individuals involved and the depth of the betrayal. Some relationships emerge stronger, having faced and overcome their darkest moments. Others, however, may find that the chasm created by broken trust is too wide to bridge, leading them to part ways or redefine their connection. The answer lies not in a universal truth, but in the unique journey of each relationship.

my love i am sorry i was mad at first figuring it was the usual dramatics but i was wrong this was important to you and i refused to see that just because i did not value it did not mean that you shared my sentiments you cared and i did not you deserve more respect than i gave you i may not have understood the matter but i could at least have respected it.