Augusnippets Day 15 - Tumblr Posts

@augusnippets day 15

Bonus prompt: Relapse

SELF HARM TW, manic episode, destructive behavior, flashbacks, toxic and abusive relationship, lots of unhealthy stuff, sex mention

(lmk if im missing a tag!)

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Whumpee was breathing quick, hardly aware of where he was. His hands shook, his body shook— he shook.

His meds... where did his meds go? He stumbled into his bathroom, pulling open his medicine cabinet and grabbing the orange bottle. Empty.

Whatever. He didn't need those anyway! Great, just fucking great.

Chucking his bottle at the wall, Whumpee closed the cabinet, looking into the mirror on the door. He was a mess, his hair ruffled, pupils dilated, eyebags dark. He was a mess. A mess.

"You're a mess."

Whumpee physically winced as his ex-boyfriend's words rang in his head. He tried to block it out, but it was too late.

"You're a mess. Look at you!" Whumper had pushed Whumpee to the ground, his eyes dark. "What do you think you're doing, huh? Running away like a little bitch? You were supposed to be home an hour ago!"

Whumpee groaned, clutching his head. He didn't need to think about Whumper. Not now. Especially after Whumper had texted him again.

"I'm sorry, okay? I forgot to check the time and‐"

"Probably letting yourself get passed around that club, huh? Stupid whore."

Maybe it didn't hurt to read his text this time? Maybe he was in a better mood than the last time they'd spoken.

Maybe Whumper wanted him again.

He unlocked his phone, opening his messaging app.

"i miss you, baby. come over, please?"

Whumpee stared at the text, running a hand through his hair. Adrenaline flushed through his system— Whumper wanted him again! He typed back hastily, breaking out in laughter to fight the tears welling in his eyes.

"be there in 20. i miss you too."

"dont be late. Bring lube."

oh.

Whumpee sunk against the wall, leaning on his bathtub. Why did he need Whumper like this, even though he knew he was going to get hurt again? Why did he like it so much?

His eyes latched onto his razor. Without thinking, he grabbed it and began to dismantle it. Slipping out a razor blade with shaky fingers, Whumpee pressed it to his wrist. He sighed as he drew a line into his skin, watching blood dribble down his wrist.

He dragged it over his skin again. He had forgotten how great this felt.

How long had it been? Weeks? Months?

Whumpee didn't care. He'd sink into this pain and let it consume him until he was okay again.

And he'd go to Whumper's house looking like a mess.