Bllb - Tumblr Posts

alternate covers: The Raven Cycle, insp.

literally everything in Adam’s pov makes my heart ache all the time but something that really struck me as the most Relatable Abuse Survivor Feeling were these passages, the first one being right after Adam pressed charges against his father and left the trailer at the end of TRB: 

Logically, Adam knew that he had nothing to miss, that he effectively had Stockholm syndrome, identifying with his captors, considering it a kindness when his father didn’t hit him. Objectively, he knew that he was abused. He knew the damage went deeper than any bruise he’d ever worn to school. He could endlessly dissect his reactions, doubt his emotions, wonder if he, too, would grow up to hit his own kid. 

But lying in the black of the night, all he could think was, My mother will never speak to me again. I’m homeless. 

And then you have this in TRK when Adam accidentally ends up back at the trailer and reflects on the trial results: 

What Ronan didn’t realize was that the victory hadn’t been in the punishment. Adam didn’t need his father to go to jail. He had merely needed someone outside the situation to look at it and confirm that yes, a crime had been committed. Adam had not invented it, spurred it, deserved it. It said so on the court paperwork. Robert Parrish, guilty. Adam Parrish, free.

And in the TRK epilogue:

It was perplexing to Adam how he had regarded this as normal for so long. He remembered how the neighbors used to turn away from his bruised face; he used to think, stupidly, that they said nothing because they thought he had somehow deserved it.

Because it doesn’t matter what Adam knows objectively about his abuse, it doesn’t matter what logic and rational thinking are telling him. He knew all the way back in TRB that he was abused and what the effects of that would be, but even in TRK, when he has developed and healed so much and come so far compared to where he was in TRB and TDT, he needed that outside validation. Because abuse survivors are constantly doubting those seemingly objective facts, constantly believing that they’re making it all up in their head and that it’s ridiculous to call it abuse because really, it’s not that bad, and they probably deserved it anyways (in fact that’s something that Robert Parrish uses against Adam in BLLB and probably many times before that - “You think they’re really gonna look at you and see an abused kid? Do you even know what abuse is? That judge will’ve heard enough stories to know a whopper. He’s not gonna blink an eye.”), and that’s why other people’s opinions matter. 

They matter to the point that Adam literally did not care whether or not his father went to jail, he only needed some sort of acknowledgement that what he went through was real, that he hadn’t invented it or deserved it. And that part of the reason Adam regarded abuse as something normal for so long and that contributed to him blaming himself for it, was the silence and the inaction and the victim blaming from the people around him who clearly saw that he was being abused. And from the results of the court case he receives the acknowledgement he needed so badly, and in the epilogue, a whole year after he moved out of his abusive household, he’s finally able to fully realize that it was all his father’s fault, that he wasn’t the one who “made it ugly,” he’s able to forgive his past self for being afraid and recognize that he saved himself.  

Also tbh he relates very heavily to this text post which like, same.

The fact that I'm only just seeing this now feels CRIMINAL

‘Blue Lily, Lily Blue’ an animation.

no you don't understand cabeswater loves them because ronan loves them and they love cabeswater because they love ronan

light following dark

I'm sorry but nothing will ever be more chaotic and deranged and hilarious than Ronan fucking Lynch answering Henry's "Parrish , how are you not dead?" with "it's your bullshit sings , they created a bullshit force field" all cool and unfazed as if Adam had not just almost been CRUSHED TO DEATH

theres just something a little poetic about ronan lynch, whose motto (according to declan) is "the world against ronan lynch" and adam "army of one" parrish falling in love and trusting one another like they don't trust anyone else and always saying tamquam alter idem to each other and imagining futures where they're together and worrying about the other and their lives getting so tangled up. theyre so invested in each other and to think they both started off lonesome and alone

i can’t get over the fact that when ronan first saw adam riding his bike he thought “please”. the fact that ronan used to sleep on the floor next to adam in at his place at st. agnes. the fact that he told adam to get inside a shopping cart and then jumped after him. the fact that he never forced him to move to monmouth. the fact that he dreamt a hand lotion for adam. the fact that adam was the first person he invited to the barns. the fact that he paid for adam’s tuiton. the fact that he told adam he might’ve dreamt him. the fact that in ronan’s eyes adam was always elegant and beautiful . the fact that in ronan’s dreams he kissed adam’s hands. the fact that adam made him smile as honestly as matthew did. the fact that when ronan kissed him he felt as much adrenaline as he did when he was racing. the fact that adam was the only other person chainsaw had a name for besides ronan. the fact that it wasn’t enough for them to say “i love you”, they always say “you are my second self”.

i can’t get over pynch.

I know his eyes are looking a bit funny BUT I just finished my first EVER digital painting and I’m super proud!! Here’s our boy Adam Parrish!! Also, the watermark/signature is my Instagram please follow that lol

Let’s all pretend his eyes are looking funny because possessed Cabeswater was doing its thang

— Stiefvater, Maggie. The Raven Boys. Scholastic Press, 2012. Chapter 39, page 360.

fuck all romance except what that half tree girl and rich welsh history (+ mythology) nerd had

I might be bisexual but at the end of the day I’m a white man’s whore and that white man is called Richard C. Gansey III

not to be horny on main but I’d like to give Adam Parrish a kiss on the forehead and tell him he’s enough and worthy

trc headcanon

ronan sitting in his room during trb and listening to heather by conan gray thinking about adam and blue

some gangsey headcanons

Exam results getting posted on a blackboard, Gansey running up to Adam and grabbing his hand and both of them running hand in hand to check their percentages

Blue showing Hozier to Gansey and Gansey listening to nothing but ever since because it’s just so oddly relatable

Little road trips to neighboring towns on some weekends

Blue collects keychains from every place she visists

All of them listening to Taylor Swift in the pig and singing along

Slumber parties where they all work on miniature Henrietta

Everyone remembers Noah

Blue and Henry making vine/meme references non stop (and introducing Noah to them who doesn’t quite get them but he’s trying his best)

Ronan making strawberry jam for everyone and bringing them all fresh milk and eggs

Blue going vegan

Bluesey can kiss

They play board games at 300 Fox Way every Saturday night

Lots of bonfires and late night talks at the barns

Henry, Blue, Gansey and Noah teasing Pynch every time Ronan stays over at St Agnes because Jesus Christ guys it’s a church

Blue gets a mullet

Ronan and Henry get along

Ronan shaving Blue’s head in the middle of the night while Gansey shaves Ronan’s head. Blue sits in her bathtub at 300 Fox Way, Ronan sits on the side with Gansey standing behind him, Henry lays in Blue’s lap while she braids his hair, Adam sits on the toilet lid while reading a book to them they’re writing a quiz on the next day — a relatively normal Monday night

Blue cutting some of Gansey’s polos into crop tops and him not realizing she did it until he has put one on but wearing it anyways because it’s summer and hot outside and everyone just loses their shit about how hot it looks

Blue, Ronan and Henry painting each other’s nails

Blue and Ronan getting piercings and tattoos together

Adam and Gansey studying together and falling asleep cuddling, Ronan walks in on it one time and just joins in

Everyone but Adam getting drunk and Adam taking care of them and forcing them to chug water every half hour

Adam growing dozens of plants in his dorm room at uni

Blue is a plant mom and super worried about her babies while she’s gone for the year so Adam adopts them too

Blue, Henry and Gansey adopting a snake on their roadtrip and naming it Glendower II

Blue and Adam going thrifting together and dragging their boyfriends along because god knows Gansey can’t dress and Ronan only possesses one single outfit

Henry owning a Paris Hilton shirt with the quote “stop being poor”; Blue owning a t-shirt dress she embroidered “eat the rich” on

Adam and Blue start discussing which rich person they’ll eat first every time one of the others annoys them or spends money on unnecessary things

Adam tutoring Blue so she aces her finals

Henry coming out as non-binary and asexual

All of them going to protests and pride together

Blue knitting the Harry Styles cardigan and gifting it to Gansey but everyone (including herself) steals it all the time and at some point it ends up with Ronan and everyone is confused because since when does that dude wear colors??

Blue spitting into some Aglionby boy’s drink at Nino’s because she heard him talk shit about her raven boys and almost getting fired for it but it was so worth it

Slumber parties at 300 Fox Way with movies, face masks and the occasional hair dye incident

Everyone has established skin care routines

Gansey getting fed up with everyone bullying his poor fashion choices and finally getting some actual sense of style (he still keeps his awful but trusty boat shoes tho)

They go to get gelato to celebrate everyone’s birthday

When Blue finds out Pynch has sex she bakes a “congrats on the sex” cake and when Ronan finds out about her and Gansey he does the same for her. Gansey gets flustered but Blue thinks it’s hilarious

Blue pegs Gansey

Blue and Ronan go out for coffee at least once a month to bitch about their boyfriends

Noah and Henry start dating

Henry teaches Blue and Adam some video games and they end up kicking Henry’s ass

Blue can play the ukulele

Adam wears jeans-overalls all the time and Ronan puts flowers in the chest pocket

Gansey never buys flowers for Blue — he picks them (and she does the same for him because he loves flowers too and fuck toxic masculinity and the concept that boys have to get flowers for the girls)

Henry singing lullabies to Gansey when he can’t sleep/has nightmares, Blue telling him stories she made up in her head

Adam stroking over Ronan’s head until he’s fast asleep

Pynch forehead kisses

Gansey gets horny every time Blue drives the pig and Henry and Ronan love to point it out and tease him about it; Blue just smirks to herself

Gansey calling Blue “little bird”, “darling” and “love”

Adam calling Ronan “darling” and “honey” in his Henrietta accent never fails to make Ronan blush

Henry always calls Blue by different shades of blue (like “indigo”); Ronan always calls her by the name of some famous witch — it’s barely ever the same name twice

Blue collects rocks that remind her of her boys and she once gets some for Matthew and Declan and Matthew can’t stop smiling for the rest of the day

Matthew having a little crush on Gansey and Henry

Breakfast/brunch at the barns each Saturday morning. Blue and Gansey arrive at least half an hour too late every time because they stayed awake for too long the night before

Adam gets a nose ring and everyone loses their shit about how hot it looks

when Richard Gansey III said “They were always walking away from him. But he never seemed able to walk away from them” I felt that

the raven cycle but instead of a mint plant, gansey grows weed

The raven cycle Julie and the phantoms au

rip me, you would’ve loved going to Henry Cheng’s toga parties

Henry is actually so valid for trauma dumping on Gansey the first chance he gets. Them bonding over their childhood traumas. True friendship was born in that hole in the ground and everyone who still doesn’t accept Henry as a part of the Gangsey is wrong and delusional