But Make It Hopeless Romantic - Tumblr Posts
thinking about five and Delores.... do you think baby five always wanted a girlfriend? do you think he would secretly read romance books when no one was watching? he is such a romantic. i wonder where it all came from. viktor and him watching music man and wishing to sweep a small town librarian off her feet. a smart girl.... (him also finding robert preston attractive but baby him didn't have enough time to think that over.) him opening up to Viktor about all this, feeling like a dumb fool for caring so much about something so pointless. he has better things to focus on like practicing his jumps, school work and his cool robot Lego machines....but god. being a preteen sucks lmao. he only got a taste of that normality before being thrown into hell. many people have said it before me but Delores is his heart, his sanity, him projecting the good he knows he has in himself onto another to bond with and keep himself going.
God and the fact that they just ignored all Five laws and rules to make him kiss his sister in law instead of exploring that, yeah....he really CAN'T comfortably date anymore. he cant just get out there bc he knows that they are too young and he'd be INSANELY uncomfortable. and he wouldn't feel right dating someone in his age range bc he would be seen as a sugar baby / gold digger. he cant win either way so he is stuck being a secret romantic that cant love romantically. Dolores is the only one that makes sense and yet she's gone....and wasn't real. him having to come to terms with that is going to be so hard for him. maybe he never will. maybe everyone just lets him have that. he had so much taken from him both by the apocalypse and the events. he has lost the ability to comfortably date. i wonder if he feels jealous of viktor going out on so many dates, a new girl every night almost and he just has to suck it up because he is glad viktor is so happy and finding himself. Lila and Diego , ray and Allison, maybe even at the wedding....he just gets a pit in his chest. he hates feeling it. he hates knowing its there. the yearning for the same. the yearning for his one and only. edit: or maybe he realizes that Dolores wasn't real and comes to terms with the fact that real romance isn't for him. learns about being aroace. he finds comfort in fictional depictions again as a way to cope with what his marriage was and still has fond memories. letting her go., understanding who she was but not disrespecting her image. so what if she was imaginary? she was still the closet friend and partner he ever had and he would never truly say she was anything less. maybe he looks down a bit on his siblings because their marriages and dating lives look so complicated and messy. he doesn't have time or want all that. THIS is the trauma talk i want. THIS is the shit the show should have covered.