Chick Fil A - Tumblr Posts
My Pleasure
Danny was never fond of Chick fil A. He always heard about their rampant homophobia and conservative Christian politics. Danny considered himself liberal on most issues and his parents were atheists which means he wasn't circumcised. But today he was feeling extra hungry and decided to give it a shot.
He pulled up to the drive-thru and opened his car window. But before he could start ordering, a strong masculine voice began speaking.
"You are late for work, boy"
Danny was shocked by this. It was an unusual thing to say to a customer.
"You must be mistaken. I'm a custo..."
The masculine voice spoke again.
"SILENCE, BOY"
"Pull up to the employee parking and park your car. Then walk into the building."
Before Danny could protest he found himself mindlessly obeying the command.
"My pleasure, sir" he said in a dull tone of voice
Danny began panicking as he walk into the building. His body was acting against his will. But his mind was still conscious.
The second Danny walked through the door he was greeted by a stern muscular man in a grey polo shirt. His nametag had "General Manager" written on it.
"You are out of uniform" the man said
"Follow me into my office and I will suit you"
"My pleasure, sir" Danny said mindlessly
Danny's boss walk him into the manager's office and locked the door behind him. He then proceeded to undress Danny.
Danny stood there unable to move as his boss pulled off his civilian clothes and dressed him in proper a Chick fil A employee uniform. Danny's muscles began to grow and spasm as each article of clothing was placed on his body.
His chest muscles ballooned up and his abs became much more pronounced. As his boss dressed him he also felt his memories of civilian life slipping away. All those years of voting democrat and liberal beliefs were gone. Replaced by a new conservative Christian worldview.
His boss looked pleased now.
"That's my good boy. You look very dapper now."
He grabbed a nametag from his desk and clipped it onto Samuel's red polo uniform. The nametag read "Samuel- Assistant Manager"
"I'm glad I decided to add you to our growing family" Samuel's boss said
"I'm feeling rather hungry, sir" Samuel said
Samuel's boss handed him a white cup
"This is our signature peach milkshake. Our secret ingredient is what makes it so addictive." He said with a wink
"I don't understand, sir. What is the secret ingredient?"
Samuel's boss unzipped his pants to reveal a thick girthy circumcised penis. He then unzipped Samuel's pants to reveal a similar thick circumcised penis.
"We make the secret ingredient in our ballsacks. The reason we are closed on Sunday is so we can harvest the secret ingredient."
"So we worship the LORD by masturbating?" Asked Samuel
"Yes, my son. Jesus Christ himself blessed our cum. Now it is our duty as devout Christians to spread his blessing through our food."
Samuel felt a thrill run through his penis. He couldn't wait to start spreading the blessings of his LORD Jesus Christ.
The next day he was assigned to work the cash register. "Your pleasure is my pleasure"
This whole Chick-Fil-A thing. Trust me, I’m tired of it too. But I just have to mock people somewhere. The Chick-Fil-A in my hometown had a flood of people come to support the marriage idea that NC seems to have. Well, people. I hate to break it to you, but you’re only supporting the franchise,...
Can all the tumblr homosexuals agree to stop buying chick fil a. It's so depressing that across the board lgbt people and supporters are indifferent to chick fil a and feel fine buying it. Can we at least stigmatize it here
Copycat Honey-Mustard Chicken Tenders - Everyday Cooking Chicken tenders are breaded in a seasoned flour mixture and garlicky bread crumbs and fried until dark and crispy in this copycat Chick-fil-A chicken recipe.
Politics aside, Chick Fil A's food is so aggressively mid.