Darknightofthesoul - Tumblr Posts
This Dark Night of the Soul certainly strips you bare. I'm having one of those crazy moments so I'll share something I reflected on.
I'm not going to lie, there are times where I wish he would just try to see us from a higher perspective. Not from this male, female, 3d relationship construct viewpoint. See who we are, who we truly are. Look beyond the physical. Remember us. Know us. Feel us. Believe. Believe because it's all true. Remember him, remember who he is! Remember why he chose to come here.
It definitely was not to just exist. Work, rest, sleep, eat. There's more! So much more!
We are magnificent. Yes we are that special. We are bound you and I. We were bound before we came into being onto this Earthly plane. We have purpose here. We are meant to be here together and help the world to heal, just by being together we achieve that. Should we activate our purpose, know that our light is powerful and enduring and shines into the great vastness of the Universe.
Think of the period of time in which we were around each other's energy and reflect on the time where we are not. Do you notice a difference in your own energy and that around you? Compare the differences. Did you not feel the power and intensity of our energy together? Did you achieve greater things? Things you wanted seemed possible, not only did they become possible but they manifested for you quicker than usual. That's not even half of how powerful we are designed to be.
I choose to exist in a different vibration, higher frequency. When I think back I can't seem to 'see' him anymore. He comes up like an idea I once had in the past. I don't recall him in the physical sense anymore. I think the realities we exist in, simply there's just too wide a gap between the two. To recall details would take me too long and the effort too much, I'm happier in the higher vibrations.
#darknightofthesoul
Being ripped open from the inside out! This is what Spirit said the process involves. This is what I'm experiencing.
This is the process of Stripping of the ego, The dark night of the soul. People who have been through the process liken it to depression. I don't know what depression feels like, but to my humanness, this process feels awful right now.
I feel alone. Confused. In the dark. Disconnected. Unbalanced. Unsure of myself. Unsure of my capabilities and abilities. Not sure if I have anything to contribute or offer anymore. Purposeless. Confusion about love. Confusion around compassion. Questioning my friendships, relationships, values...my heart feels like it's smashing into broken little pieces and I think it's quite possible that it'll be just me, just me, who will be there for myself, to try to make myself whole again.
I feel abandoned. I feel alone. I have all of these intense feelings and thoughts but at the same time, they all seem to sum up to make me feel like a vastness of nothingness, and completely worthless.
Why am I here? What is my value? What is my purpose? Do I have any?
It feels as though I've taken 10,000 steps backwards and yes, I feel like crying even though I don't know what I'll be crying for.
If I take myself out of my humanness and shift my focus to my soul, my experience shifts with it too. That's usually a seamless process for me to but during The dark night of the soul, it is very hard to do!
My soul finds this process quite enjoyable. As much as I hated to write that just then, my Soul does enjoy it and my humanness just wants to feel sadder for it.
I'm as still as I could be this evening. It's 12.23am and inside of me, everything is going a million miles per hour. I'm surprised I'm putting sentences together!
I might take myself out for a nice drink if I survive this.
#19072021
“Biding Time Underwater”
Acrylic and mixed media painting on canvas ..