Gurathin - Tumblr Posts
PreservationAux (+ their SecUnit)
The scene in Exit Strategy where MB is recovering from accidentally deleting its brain is always so funny to me because basically its been telling us all along that it doesn’t know what it wants but as soon as it wakes up with no filter, no memories and no ability to control its mouth it sure as hell tells us what it doesn’t want lol
Like it immediately wakes up and starts complaining like
- I don’t want to be a pet bot
- I don’t want to be human
- I don’t like Gurathin (but Ratthi is my friend I guess)
- Your ship is old and shitty
- I don’t like planets
And then it hits us with the emotional hit of « I don’t like planets because 1. Something is always trying to eat the humans and 2. They’re harder to escape ». And like ouch because yeah okay MB just told PresAux that escaping is always on its mind, but it also just told them that escaping is always its second priority after protecting the humans 🥲
But mostly its grouchy and complaining about everything and that is just deeply funny to me. Deadly murder construct get its opportunity to express its deepest, most unfiltered thoughts for the first time and just immediately starts airing petty grievances and telling you your ship sucks ass
Ohhhhhhthis is great. I think of that title as one of those moments when you’re not sure whether you’re in the in-group enough to make The Joke so the one who grants that Joke’s permissions specifically invites you into it. It’s a little reproach, a little forgiveness and a LOT of “get in here, fucker.”
Exit Strategy has so many gems that it's easy to miss some of the more subtle ones. Today I'm fixating on the video that our protagonist sent to Gurathin when he asked what it's been up to.
Specifically, the title of the video.
"Murderbot Impersonates An Augmented Human Security Consultant"
Murderbot. It calls itself Murderbot, a name it has never told anyone before. A name Gurathin took from its memories in one of their last meetings, and while it seems more, like, annoyed than traumatized by this, it still is a pretty rude thing to do, let alone share without permission like he does. (He does have valid reason to be concerned at the time, but still.)
What does it mean for Murderbot to call itself Murderbot in a file made to answer the question of the human who found out it's called Murderbot? Remember, this isn't something it had lying around - it edited together video on the spot to answer his question.
Every time I reread ES, I find my own underlining of that title and ask this question again, and then forget it.
It becomes slightly laxer (again not entirely willfully) with the name in Network Effect, but Murderbot's name is usually private information that it doesn't choose to share (later in ES it does choose to reassure Mensah that it is who it says it is, which, again. Just. Imagine being in the position where a technically-killer construct reassures you that it calls itself Murderbot. What a time).
It could be a sort of subtle dig, that it doesn't need to hide this info because Gurathin already has it. It could be an unconscious act of, if not trust, then neutrality, that it doesn't need to hide this info because, again, Gurathin already has it. It could be a reminder, a comedic juxtaposition with the rest of the title and contents of the video. Hell, it could be Murderbot's idea of an in-joke at this point. I just don't know. But when I think of this passage, I think of the part soon after, where Murderbot grudgingly appreciates Gurathin giving the hostage negotiator such a cold shoulder that even it's impressed. I think of it interrupting Gurathin viewing the recording because the rep has arrived. I think of Gurathin, wrist-deep in manual controls (and hey, when they discussed the humans' luggage, Gurathin's mention was his specialized toolkit).
I don't know. There's a lot there. Gurathin is, ever more obvious on each reread, just Murderbot: Human Edition, and Murderbot absolutely refuses to acknowledge this in any form, and it will still take care of him.
A+ take.
I want to add about the end of Exit Strategy that in his capacity of standing beside Mb with a possibly literal clipboard, murmuring about its status, Gurathin is giving it another milestone safety confirmation.
How many times must it have had to lie frozen beside techs that talked about it and did whatever horrible thing they might feel like to it? It’s most defiant when it’s scared and since it was also more than a little borked at the time, there’s got to have been a lot of unintentional evocation of half-remembered horrors and other negative feelings: what if they scrap me? What if the discover me? What if they try to delete my *me*?!
Consciously or not, it goes right for a check that is doing the same thing the ASR moment does: testing the improbable hope that it *might* not be in danger. Are these humans (STILL?!) safe enough to not panic/fight/escape? Is it safe to be confused/helpless rn?
Being in that position when every other time it would be in dread of discovery or torture or destruction and having in one line confirmation that it was known, and the pretense of obedience was not required, and the evaluation was of its state, not its worth - I can’t imagine. Pretty slick, G.
the thing about Murderbot's """relationship""" with Gurathin is that the first time it vocally expressed its dislike for Gurathin was the very first time it was ever able to vocally express its dislike for anyone.
And it was not punished! Nothing bad happened to it because of this! The PreservationAux team was just like, fine, your opinion is noted and valid, we still all have to work together to not die though.
for someone who was never allowed to let anyone else know it even had opinions, this is a big fucking deal.
its actions toward Gurathin later on (especially obvious in Fugitive Telemetry) show that it considers Gurathin a trusted and valued teammate. And maybe it will never remove the "I don't like him" tag from Gurathin's internal profile but that is not a sign of their friendship needing repair, it is a sign that Murderbot feels safe and free enough to be a little bitchy hater. and i say, good for it!
uh hi. i wanted to illustrate one of the introductary scenes for SecUnit's character, since that would go along well with this being kind of my first post here. i... think that makes some sense. i promise more Murderbot diaries fanart after this (calling it content feels icky)). (did I start overusing brackets becouse of these books? possibly).
and i hope i captured SecUnit freaking out while trying to keep its composure at the same time well. as weird as it sounds, i like seeing depictions of it being nervous, becouse this side of it is what got me to relate to it so much in the first place (besides the heavily implied neurodivergence. though i guess the two go hand in hand). examples: in the second panel of the second page i tried showing how Gurathin's words affected it by making the speech bubbles visually "choke" (?) it, though it kept its face straight. oh, and i made it look much shorter than it actually is to mirror the way it is feeling!! figuring out details like that was pretty fun
(i'm sorry for any inconsistencies and the messy colouring and linework, i have ADHD and i get incredibly bored when i spend time trying to make everything "perfect" and looking the same in each panel... )