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hi hope ur doing well! i wanted to ask if you could write a reaction of when the boys forget about a date and leave you waiting for a while for them? i'd like the members to be joshua, mingyu, seungkwan, vernon, and dino if possible! thank u sm in advance!

svt + forgetting your date

➔ reaction || requested

➔ warnings: none || 1167 words ➔ notes: fluff ; i'm doing pretty well! getting a lot of things done these days :) i wish i could spend a little more writing and drawing, but it is what it is. if you enjoyed this, please reblog! also if you're interested in any writing/art commissions, check out my carrd. or visit my ko-fi just cuz!

JOSHUA: you know that this guy never checks his messages, so whenever you need him for emergencies, you always call instead. that's why, when your signal is only strong enough for a flurry of texts, he doesn't see them until an hour later. your last message reads i'll just go home. confused, he scrolls up to find a bunch of emojis and ? are you standing me up lol and ...are you seriously standing me up, and it takes a second before he finally realizes what today is. fuck. fuck. he's the one who scheduled this date, going on a spiel about how you haven't seen each other in a while, so you went out of your way to free up your schedule. and now he looks like a grade-a asshole for forgetting. scratch that, he is a grade-a asshole. he makes a few stops around town to pick up your favorite things for a night in before going to your place. it won't make up for the missed date, that much is obvious from your unimpressed stare as you open the door, but he's going to try his best to earn your forgiveness. in fact, as soon as he sees you, he gets on his knees on your steps with a dramatic declaration of, "love, i'm so, so sorry," and you have to drag him to his feet, saying that he's embarrassing you in front of your neighbors. but hey, at least you cracked a smile.

MINGYU: when seungcheol asks if he wants to continue their biking excursion to hit up a cool restaurant, mingyu says yes, even though he feels like he should have declined for some reason. that feeling continues tickling the back of his mind, up until they pay for the meal and cheol asks if they should get dessert. that's when you text him, informing your boyfriend that there's about ten minutes of trailers if he's running late, and his heart drops. he completely forgot about your movie date today. he tells you to go in first. i'll be there later, he types, i have my ticket on my phone. then he tells seungcheol what happened, and seungcheol asks how the hell he'll make it in time when they still have to bike back to their car. spoiler alert: he doesn't. by the time he makes it to the theater and pathetically slinks into his seat next to you, the movie is already in its final arc, and you're aggressively eating your snacks, ignoring his presence. he trails after you once the movie ends, waiting for your verdict and hoping that you'll take pity on his bedraggled state. you pause by your car and sigh. "well, c'mon," you say, opening the trunk for his bike rack. "i'm not so angry that i'll make you cycle all the way home." he decides during that tense car ride that he'll make the best dinner of his life tonight.

SEUNGKWAN: it's late, and you're still not home. after a while of worrying by himself, he calls and asks where you are. he almost thinks that the call dropped because you're silent for a full minute before asking him, incredulously, if he's serious. of course he's serious. he just finished an episode of a new drama, and he never makes it through one. "i've been waiting at the restaurant for the past twenty minutes," you say slowly. "and you're chilling in the living room?" no way. isn't that tomorrow? he flicks open his calendar and gasps when he realizes his mistake. "wait there for a bit, okay? i'm on my way," he says, scrambling to his feet, but you quickly stop him with a scoff. "you still need to get dressed and then get all the way here. they can't wait that long. i'll just leave." he feels awful. he slaps himself on the cheeks to get sense back into him. seungkwan, he scolds himself mentally. how could you do this? how could he forget this date? and it's not like you didn't try to reach him—he sees all the texts and phone calls now, blocked by the do not disturb that he forgot to turn off. "will they let you in by yourself? why don't you eat whatever you want and charge it to my card, hm? i'm so sorry."

VERNON: he doesn't know what he did wrong, but apparently he did something because you just went radio silent yesterday afternoon, even though you're still posting on your story. when he wakes up in the morning, he sees that even his good night texts are ignored. he sends you a good morning text anyway and asks how you slept, asks what your plans are for the day. by the time he gets to work, there's still no reply. "hey!" seungkwan yells out, rushing to his side. vernon automatically reaches for the coffee that he knows is around somewhere—seungkwan is nothing but predictable—and hums when he finds it. "so what'd you end up getting y/n yesterday? i thought you'd ask me for gift ideas, but since you were so secretive this year, i figured it was big." vernon blinks at him. "what was yesterday?" seungkwan blinks back. "you're kidding...their birthday dinner? you wanted to celebrate a week early? hello?" he snatches back his coffee. "you're the one who insisted on it. did you forget?" seungkwan's withering look bounces off the absolute dread that vernon feels. no wonder you were ignoring him. he pushes past seungkwan, already pulling out his phone. "i need to make a call really quick. can you tell the others i'll be late?"

CHAN: this is the lamest excuse in the book, but his phone died, and while he could've borrowed a charger...what was the point? if there was an emergency, people knew to call the other members. that's why he doesn't bother plugging it in until after practice, and when it finally charges up, the belated alert for your date appears, and he swears loud enough for the others to send him a look. "sorry!" he says, throwing all of his things into his bag. "you guys eat without me. i have somewhere to be!" he flies down the stairs and books it out of the building. something about his expression makes everyone jump out of his way, wondering what the heck has him so harried. somehow, he makes it to the place in record time and scans the crowd for your face, lighting up when he sees you under an awning. then his smile falls when he sees your expression. he feels so, so bad for leaving you waiting out here. he shrugs off his jacket and puts it around your shoulders, ignoring the fact that you don't look happy to see him. "why don't we get something warm to drink?" he murmurs, clasping your cold hands. at least he didn't miss the main event—if he missed that, he doesn't know if you'll forgive him.

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how seventeen react to their s/o falling asleep during pillow talk

requested by anon : "hii how do you think svt would react if you were talking in bed cuddling before sleeping and (pillow talk one of my fave things ever omg) and they were rambling and suddenly they look at you and you're asleep?"

notes: haha this one really is so adorable

masterlist

seungcheol

he's in the middle of trying to give you tips on how to get through a tiring day bc you'd told him you've been having an exhausting week, but when he looks over at you while talking about conversation tactics he sees you've fallen asleep on his shoulder, snuffling quietly in your sleep. he just smiles, soft, putting an arm around you and adjusting you so that you're in a more comfortable position, kissing you on the forehead goodnight

jeonghan

definitely wakes you up. not in a 'startling you awake' kind of way, tho. he just shakes your shoulder gently, whispering that you fell asleep while he was telling you how much he loves him. laughs softly when you murmur blurrily that you didn't mean to, and just kisses your forehead and tells you that it's okay, that he loves you anyway, that he's always going to love you no matter what

joshua

doesn't wake you up, but pretends that he is. pinches your cheek, brushes the hair out of your face, smiling down at your relaxed expression. whispers scoldings to you for falling asleep while he's talking—he's not that boring, you brat—before snuggling next to you and closing his eyes, drifting off to sleep too, the 'i love you' on his tongue and whispered in his dreams

junhui

carries on talking. if he talks for long enough then his voice and what he's saying can enter your brain and it'll influence your dreams right?? he doesn't exactly know the logistics of that, but if he holds you in his arms and keeps talking mindlessly about the random things you did today that made him smile, then hopefully he can make you smile in your dreams too

hoshi

is whispering all "hey >:((( you fell asleep >:(((" even though you literally are, like, asleep. like he said. rambles about how heartbroken he is, bc literally he's here talking about how incredible his day was and now you're asleep??? drifts off with you sleeping on his shoulder and blurred words of "i just really love you okay" on his lips

wonwoo

he's been watching you the entire time, of course he saw when your eyes started drooping and you fell asleep next to him. just smiles and gently gathers you in his arms, closing his eyes against you and preparing to fall asleep too. it's not like you both were talking about anything that important, anyway. 

woozi

he wanted you to fall asleep tbh. he came back from work really late and was surprised to find you up, waiting for him. talked to you quietly for a few minutes, but after a moment passes where his question hangs in the air unanswered, he knows you've drifted off. some part of him is touched you stayed up when it's obvious you were so tired, and the other part is exasperated that you stayed up when it's obvious you were so tired

minghao

he's explaining some new philosophical idea he learned that day when he feels your breathing slow beside him, no longer humming in acknowledgement when he pauses. he doesn't say anything about it, just letting his voice peter out naturally, his hand finding your cheek in the darkness to rub a thumb over your cheekbone, soft and fond, making a mental note to tell you about the theory of solipsism later

mingyu

probably falls asleep before you tbh. one minute he's spooning you and telling you about his day, and the next minute, he pauses to take a breath and then suddenly lets out a quiet snore. it makes you laugh, a little, at how suddenly he fell asleep, but you just close your eyes too, his gentle snuffles warm on your neck, his arm a comforting weight over your waist. 

dokyeom

pouts to himself, bc he's not that boring is he??? kisses your forehead and promises himself that he's going to sulk and whine the next morning but you wake him up with such a lovely smile saying that you're sorry for falling asleep on him last night :((( and it's so sweet that instantly all thoughts of pouting and whining are out of the window as he just squishes you into a hug

seungkwan

listening to seungkwan talk is just so… relaxing, actually, so it's happened a lot while you're in bed after a long day and he tells you in a soft voice about everything that's happened. he holds you on his chest, arm around your shoulders, and pillow talk with him is basically just him talking you to sleep more than anything else

vernon

hansol is probably the type of guy who wants to hear about your day rather than rambling about his, so you end up falling asleep on him while telling him about the weird thing that your friend did today. your voice gets drowsier, taking longer to continue after you pause, so he just laughs softly and gathers you in his arms, telling you it's okay and you can tell him later, but now it's probably a good idea to go to sleep

chan

notices it the second that you're no longer making little humming noises whenever he takes a break in the middle of what he's saying. looks over to see you, head half buried in the blankets, in deep sleep and just sighs fondly. strokes the hair out of your face, goes "what am i going to do with you?" all sweet and adoring before settling into bed himself, whispering "sweet dreams" before he closes his eyes

request guidelines

reactions tags: @jeonginssa @magicaltonaru @weird-bookworm @minhui896 @turningcarat @nakedgrapes @bunnyiix @slytherinshua @haowrld @belladaises @iheartyujin @summery-bat @newgirlygirl @moonlitskiiies @ejspencer14 @mirxzii @wonranghaeee @saythename-chess @yonabutnotyuna @youthoughtiwasfeelingyou @crackedpumpkin @wqnwoos @butiluvu @sunshinekyeom-sang @ocyeanicc @zozojella @thesmellofcoffeeandrain @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @kawennote09 @a-wandering-stay @icyminghao @nananacomeonnnn @valenhui @sweet-like-caramel @hansolaria @gam3bo1z @marisblogg @evasaysstuff @odxrilove @kyeomyun

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' ENCHANTED TO MEET YOU ' | h. joshua

synopsis : the one where twitter helps you find the cute stranger from vacation pairing : joshua hong x gn!reader genre/s : one-shot smau, non-idol au, fluff

from reese, with love <3

and another tiny little smau in honor of speak now tv hehehe thank you for reading, i'd love to know what u think ! take care :>

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SEVENTEEN SENDING YOU BOYFRIEND PICTURES [VU VERS.]

HHU VERS. || PU VERS.

yoon jeonghan.

hong joshua.

lee jihoon.

lee seokmin.

boo seungkwan.

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that josh au was so cute :((( i loved it sm 🥹🥹 is there any chance that we’d get to see some of the gc texts that were mentioned? (if not then it’s totally fine too!! hope ur having an amazing day/night <3)

gc texts ???? you got it hehe

** that was supposed to say your impulse and not youre oops-

anyways im glad u enjoyed that little smau <33

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Just Like That — h.joshua

» seventeen masterlist «

playlist: fever — enhypen; light a flame — seventeen; sexuality — taemin

➮ incubus!Joshua × f!reader

wc: 16k

summary: fantasizing about her handsome and sweet coworker has some unintended consequences for Y/N when an incubus shows up in her home after unintentionally summoning him with what she thought was just gibberish.

genres/themes/au: angst, one sided pining, smut; religious themes, supernatural themes, demonic themes; non idol au, demon au

warnings: adult dialogue, female reader, sexual content (18+ mdni), see smut warnings under the cut!

permanent taglist: @yoonguurt @wonderfulshinee @candidupped @dejavernon @violagoth @tigermoonbiss @katsukis1wife @luvsooby @thesolarplanetarysystem @salty-for-suga @devilsmatches @dmnspiit @simeonswhore @yangracha @atinypurr @aikyubi @labyrinthonmymind @bintificreads @toxic-babexe @plutoneu @sunwoosbaby @lilramennoodle @deadgirlwalking3

seventeen taglist: @aikisbbq @drunk-on-dk @cixrosie @hoeforcheol @98-0603 @briannabk22 @vampiirose @plants-w0rld @dementedaly @generic-teez-127 @sweetlylemon unable to tag: @prestineaugstine @imwhoever @lunaryoongie

join my taglists: permanent | group

Strikethrough means I cannot tag you. 

MINORS WILL BE BLACKLISTED & BLOCKED. 

a/n: this is just pure filth and I won't apologize lol I did this to torture the bestie. It was supposed to be a timestamps lol and it turned into 16k. Thank you for reading, reblogs and comments are always appreciated, and as always, this is a work of fiction and all characters are not reflective of their respective irl counterparts. for entertainment purposes only.

A huge thank you to @kpop-stories-21 & @anyamaris for sprinting with me back to back and essentially keeping me company while I worked on this 💕

Translation notes: Cur curritis is google translate latin for ‘why are you running?’ disclaimer: I do not know latin so this could be wildly inaccurate because it’s google translate. Likewise, Mortalem te interro- gavi is what I got for ‘i asked you a question, mortal.’ Again, I don’t know latin. I just used google translate. I’m not going for accuracy here lol. The incantation, Te invoco a profundus inferni is from Supernatural lol

smut warnings: unprotected sex (pls use protection), tentacles, dirty talk, praise, pet names (baby, doll, angel, slut, etc), marking (f receiving), spanking (f receiving) , spitting, choking (f receiving) , fingering (f receiving), slight somnophilia, rough sex, anal, double penetration, multiple orgasms (f receiving), creampie, breeding kink, big d!ck!Joshua being a menace to my sanity, dom!Shua, sub!Reader, and I think that's everything but of course, let me know if I missed something!

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Autumn was in the air. The mornings had become chilly, frosty dew covered grass crunching underfoot that gave way to cool days, the sun warming just enough but not burning. The scent of the holidays hung in the air as you noticed decor going up on your way to work in the mornings.

The only coffee shop in town had finally put up their fall menu and despite how much flack you got for it, you were excited that the pumpkin cakes and warm vanilla chai lattes with a sprinkle of cinnamon and Halloween themed foam designs were back. On your days off, you could enjoy a steaming mug, adoring the jack-o-lantern face staring back at you from atop your drink.

On days like today, you opted for the to-go version of your favorite vanilla latte, grabbing an americano as well as two slices of pumpkin cake, topped with chopped candied walnuts. The bell rang, the sound crystal clear as you exited the shop and headed down the sidewalk littered with fallen leaves in various shades of browns, oranges, and yellows.

Children hurried on by, on their way to school as you walked, rounding the corner and heading for the end of the block where the antique shop you worked at stood, the old brick building stood. It was a much older building than the ones that stood around it, the brick darker and more weatherworn.

You let out a sigh, breath hanging briefly in the cool air as you looked at the storefront. White and black striped awnings hung over the large windows, gold lettering adorning the glass in a curly script that read ‘Pandora’s Box’. You crossed the cobblestone street, heading for the old wooden door and pressed down on the handle. It turned under your hand and allowed you to enter the shop.

A soft bell rang out and immediately you could hear shuffling coming from the back of the shop.

“Sorry!” a voice called out. “We’re closed!” You ignored the voice as you moved around behind the front counter and set down both coffees and the paper bag with the pumpkin cake. You were taking off your coat when your coworker and owner of the voice appeared and glanced over at you.

“Oh, it’s you,” he said, perking up and straightening his tan colored apron. You fought the urge to giggle as he walked over to the door and peered outside the window before turning the lock and looking over at you. “Thought I locked that when I came in,” he said as you removed your scarf and hung it up with your coat on the hook behind your seat.

“What’s this?” Joshua asked, looking down at the two coffees. You picked yours up and took a sip before picking the second one up and held it out for him. “You got me coffee?” he asked, taking the cup gently from you. “Hot americano, extra cream,” you answered, setting your cup down. “I also got us some-” you were interrupted by a sharp knocking at the window of the door.

Both you and Joshua turned to look and saw an older woman standing at the door. It was the elderly woman that lived out on Broome street. “Isn’t that the cat lady?” Joshua whispered, turning his head to look at you as he set his cup down. “Mrs. Briggs,” you reminded him.

Joshua moved to the door and unlocked it, opening the door and no doubt giving the grumpy old woman a pleasant smile. “How can I help you Mrs. Briggs?” he asked in his sweet voice. The old woman wore a very old fur coat that was a bit ratty, almost as if it hadn’t been taken proper care of.

Under the brown fur, she wore a mustard yellow turtleneck sweater with a long brown skirt that reached almost to her ankles. Under she had brown stockings and some brown low heels. She had all of her gray hair piled on top of her head in a messy bun complete with a yellow scrunchie. In her hands she carried a basket full of different knick knacks and trinkets.

“I need to drop these off,” she said in a gruff voice as she attempted to push past Joshua who blocked her path. She looked up at him, lips parted in a look of pure shock. “Who are you?” she demanded. Joshua gave her his famous smile. The one that had all the girls in the coffee shop swooning or the high school girls giggling as he passed by.

Joshua had only lived in this town for a few years now. He moved into the space above the shop which was owned by his aunt. His uncle had originally run the shop but after his uncle got sick and passed away, Joshua moved in to help his aunt out. He was only supposed to be in town for a short time but he decided to stay after a year. 

Joshua smiled at Mrs. Briggs. “It’s Joshua, Mrs. Briggs,” he reminded her. She looked positively outraged. “Well where is Bill?” she demanded angrily. “Uncle Bill passed away three years ago, Miriam,” you said, moving from behind the counter and approaching the door.

Upon seeing you, Mrs. Briggs looked much calmer. “Y/N!” she said desperately. You sent a subtle wink Joshua’s way and took over, keeping the old woman at the door. “I need to drop this off. I can’t have it in the house anymore,” she said, holding out the basket. You nodded, looking down and back up.

“Okay, Miriam. Let me just get my pad of paper and we’ll take care of it,” you said, turning to grab the pad from the counter. In your momentary lapse, Mrs. Briggs had managed to push the door open. Joshua moved forward but you waved him off. “I got this,” you mouthed as the woman set her basket on the counter. Joshua nodded and started to head to the back when you called him back, holding out his coffee and the paper sack.

He took them from you and you told him you’d eat your pumpkin cake later.

It took all of ten minutes to check in all the items Mrs. Briggs had brought in and when you were done, you gently ushered her to the door and waved her off before shutting and locking the door. Joshua reappeared, peering around. “You think after three years, she’d know who I am,” he said, moving to lean on the counter as you finished adding the items to the store’s inventory.

“She’s got Alzheimer’s,” you said softly as you worked. Joshua said nothing, watching you write instead. When you finished the line you were on, he finally spoke. “Sorry,” he whispered. You glanced up as you capped the pen and smiled at him. “It’s okay,” you responded, setting the pen aside and flipping the page to a new sheet. “She’s a mean old lady, even before her diagnosis. Very pushy and rude,” you replied as you started to place the items back in the basket.

Joshua moved to help you. “Did she want the basket back?” he asked as you worked together. You shook your head. “No,” you said with a chuckle. “The only thing Mrs. Briggs has more than cats are baskets. I don’t think she’ll be missing this one.” You gave him a wink and made to grab the handles. He stopped you, taking the basket himself. “I got this,” he said and nodded towards the back.

“Your slice of pumpkin cake is in the back. I’ll finish opening up, you go eat.”

You smiled, thanking him before heading to the break room in the back. It wasn’t so much a room as it was an area blocked off. There was a small kitchenette with a mini fridge, microwave, and a sink. In the middle of the space was a small round table with three wooden chairs. Sitting on the table was the paper sack. You washed your hands quickly and took a seat, opening the bag.

The pumpkin cake was delicious as always and you savored each bite. As you were finishing it, Joshua’s voice rang out from the front. “I’m going to open the shop!” he called. You stuffed the last bite of cake in your mouth and got up, tossing the paper sack in the bin and washed your hands, chewing hastily as you dried your hands and hurried back to the front.

Joshua stood behind the counter and looked up as you approached. “You didn’t have to come up here,” he chuckled as you grabbed your own apron from under the counter and put it on. “I was finished anyway,” you replied, attempting to tie your apron strings. Joshua laughed softly and moved to stand behind you. “Here,” he said softly, taking the ties from you and carefully tying them.

“It’s a lot easier when you have help,” he said, his voice soft and breath hitting the back of your neck.

Your cheeks burned and you were thankful he couldn’t see the way you drew your bottom lip between your teeth or hear the way your heart hammered in your chest or feel the heat rush to your core.

“There,” he said simply and moved to grab the paper he’d been reading. “All set.”

You forced a smile, turning your head before moving to your usual spot behind the counter and taking a seat on the stool.

It wasn’t the first time you’d had this reaction to Joshua and it certainly wouldn’t be the last.

You weren’t proud to admit it, but you’d had more than one fantasy about your coworker. It was his fault really for being so nice and polite and sweet. Not to mention incredibly handsome and when he pushed his sleeves up, exposing his forearms, you could feel your panties stick to you every time he did something so effortlessly. 

It was no secret half the women in town found Joshua attractive and you were one of them. Unfortunately for you, he was your coworker and although Bill wasn’t around anymore, Joshua seemed to adhere to the strict no dating coworkers policy Bill had. Of course, Bill was married and he was usually the only one in the shop until you joined.

You weren’t in the habit of dating bosses so you never cared much about the policy but now it was driving you mad. Especially during the times it felt like Joshua was flirting with you though you never truly knew for sure if he was serious or just being playful. It was hard to tell with him.

The morning flew by after opening the shop. It wasn’t like you were busy. Most of the customers that came in only wanted to look around and very few ever bought anything. Sometimes you’d have town residents come by and drop off their old things. Most of your job was cashiering and inventory.

Joshua did most of the restoration work that came with old furniture as well as other physical tasks like carrying the larger items out to customers’ cars or moving large furniture items to make space for new items. When you weren't busy ringing someone up or filling out an inventory sheet, you’d find yourself watching Joshua work, admiring the way he lifted things with ease. He’d pushed up the sleeves of his cream colored sweater hours ago, exposing his forearms and the veins that peeked out whenever he exerted any force.

You tried not to make it obvious you were staring but sometimes he’d glance over and catch you, prompting you to turn your gaze back to the crossword puzzle you were absentmindedly filling out with bogus answers in pencil. When you looked away, you missed the way Joshua’s smile turned into more of a smirk. He knew you were watching him and he knew he had an effect on you to some extent.

But not the full extent.

He didn’t know how you sometimes thought about him late at night as you teased yourself with your fingers or how you imagined it was his fingers as you pushed them into your aching heat. He didn’t know it was him that you dreamed about riding or that you wondered how his cock tasted.

And he never would.

The sun had started to set when Joshua finally locked the front door. You stretched your arms above your head, letting out the tiniest of squeaks as he walked over. “You can head home,” he said, leaning against the counter, resting his palms against the surface.

“I can close up here,” he added. You shook your head. “It’s okay, you answered. “I don’t have any plans.” Joshua tilted his head, trying to hold back a smirk. “No exciting hot dates?” he asked as you opened the register. You snorted, shaking your head. “No,” you replied.

“Why not?” he asked as you started to count the bills in the till. You looked up to meet his gaze. You hadn’t expected him to ask you that. “Uh…” you trailed off as you stopped counting. “I guess I just haven’t met someone,” you answered. Joshua’s head tilted the opposite way at that.

“You haven’t?” he pressed. It seemed like he was trying to make a point but you weren’t sure what he expected you to say. You shook your head. “Well,” you continued. “Not anyone that’s available,” you added softly, turning your gaze back down to continue counting.

You finished counting the bills and moved onto the change as Joshua watched you. When you finished and wrote down the total, adding it to the records book, Joshua finally spoke. “How about we finish up here and then go get dinner,” he offered. You nearly tripped over your own feet as you turned away from the shelf where you stored the records book.

Turning to look at him, you found him already looking at you, a smile and expectant look.

“O-okay,” you said softly, mentally cursing yourself for stammering. Joshua smiled and turned away before heading to the back of the shop to make sure everything was locked up while you pulled out the profits from the register and placed them into a bank bag and headed for the back where you found Joshua grabbing the broom. “Here,” you said, holding out the bank bag.

He looked up as he separated the dustpan from the broom. He nodded towards the door that led upstairs. “Just set it up on the counter up there,” he said as he moved past you for the door back into the shop. “What?” you asked, turning as he stopped at the door. “Just put it on the kitchen counter up here,” he said with a smile. You glanced at the door to the stairs and then back at Joshua.

“You mean in your apartment?”

He nodded, the smile spreading. “Yeah,” he answered. “Here.” You watched as he reached into his pocket and fished out his keys before tossing them to you. “Just let yourself in.”

With that, he disappeared into the front and left you standing in the break area. Taking a deep breath, you turned to the door and took hold of the knob. ‘You got this Y/N,’ you told yourself. ‘It’s just his apartment.’ 

You turned the knob and pushed the door open. It creaked softly as you peered into the dimly lit hall. The bottom landing was small and immediately went into the staircase. You shut the door behind you and started up the stairs, each step creaking under foot.

At the top, you managed to pick out the right key and unlocked the door before pushing it open.

Whatever you’d been expecting, it was not this. You’d only ever seen this space once and it was a mostly empty space with a few furniture items stored up here. It was dusty, dark save for the large glass windows at the back of the space that looked out into a small courtyard that backed up to a wooded area. The space had been transformed into a functional studio apartment.

A kitchen had been installed, brown counters with white quartz tops lined the wall against the stairs. A kitchen island separated the kitchen space from the living space. Facing a brick wall was a comfortable looking sofa with a low table between it and a media stand where a large flatscreen stood.

You walked further into the apartment, shutting the door behind you as you continued to look around.

The media stand held numerous DVDs and knick knacks. A knitted blanket lay folded over the arm of the cream colored couch with warm brown accent pillows. On the coffee table sat a small mirrored tray with a gold rim. In the middle was a small tv remote and a couple candles.

Against the wall under the windows stood a side table running the length of one of the windows. It had doors with small brass knobs and most likely held an assortment of different things. ‘Probably storage,’ you told yourself as you turned away from the living room. 

Behind the couch was a partition wall that didn’t reach the ceiling. It was made of bamboo and straight geometric shapes with a sheer material on one side to create a separate bedroom space.

The bed was a large king size, wooden frame with clawed feet. You recognized it as one of the pieces that had been stored up here before. Joshua must have cleaned and restored it because the last time you saw it, the wood was dull and coated with a thick layer of dust. 

At the end of the bed was a small bench with a folded blanket and a space to sit. Oh either side of the bed were matching nightstands in matching wood to the bed frame. The bed linens were creams and browns, both neutral but cozy and inviting. 

Next to the bedroom space at the end of the kitchen was a small folding door housing what you assumed was a pantry and next to that was another door which you could only assume led to a bathroom. 

Between the bed and the bathroom stood a large armoire with double doors. It was another piece that you recognized being stored in the space and just like the bed frame, Joshua cleaned and restored it so it was almost unrecognizable.

Next to the armoire in the corner was a full length mirror leaning against the wall. The top was decorated with postcards and a few pictures. Before you had a chance to move closer and take a look, you heard the door behind you open and spun around to find Joshua entering the apartment.

The two of you stared at one another for a moment before he spoke. “I’m done downstairs,” he commented. “Thought you might have gotten lost,” he added with a smirk. You shook your head, still holding the bank bag. Joshua nodded towards it. “You gonna hold onto that?” he asked, amused when you quickly set it down on the kitchen island.

“Shall we then?” he asked, nodding towards the door. You nodded without another word and headed for the door quickly, much to his amusement. Joshua stopped you with his hand on your arm gently. You looked down at his hand and up to meet his gaze. He held out his other hand.

“Keys?” he asked simply. You dropped them in his hand and headed down the stairs as he chuckled to himself, closing the door and locking it before following you.

“Are you hungry?” he asked as you reached the landing. You nodded again. “Yeah,” you managed to say as he led the way into the front of the shop. “How does Italian sound?” he asked as you grabbed your things, pulling on your coat and scarf. You nodded, heading for the door as he followed.

“Italian sounds fine.”

Once the shop was locked up, the walk to the Italian restaurant didn’t take much time at all. It was a small place with only about 5 tables and a small bar. It was nestled between a bakery and butcher shop, all owned by the same family. Joshua held the door for you with a smile as you thanked him and stepped inside.

You’d been to this place maybe once or twice in the whole time you’d lived in this town. It had been owned by the same family for generations and was currently being run by the grandchildren of the original owner. A young girl at the host stand smiled as you entered the building.

“Just two?” she asked. Joshua nodded as she gathered the menus and silverware, rolled up into black cloth napkins. She tucked the menus and silverware into her arm and picked up a pen, jotting something down on a piece of paper on the host stand before smiling at the two of you. “Right this way!”

She led you to a smaller table in the corner meant for couples. All the tables were round, most seating about four patrons. There was a small room off the main dining area with a much larger table meant for bigger parties. Along the wall were smaller tables with two chairs each and at the back was the bar. A long window allowed a look into the kitchen where you could catch glimpses of workers passing by.

A door at the far corner opposite your table allowed workers in and out of the kitchen. You removed your coat, laying it across the back of your chair and sat down as Joshua did the same and the hostess set the menus and silverware down on the table. “What can I get you started to drink?” she asked as you both settled into your seats.

“Just water,” you answered, not in the mood for soda or coffee. Joshua smiled at the hostess as he glanced over the drink menu. “A glass of cabernet, please,” he said politely. He turned to look at you. “You sure you just want water?” he asked, tilting his head. You looked down at the menu, eyes scanning before finding something that sounded good. “I’ll just have a limoncello martini,” you said, looking up at the hostess who smiled and nodded. “I’ll go put those in and your server will be by soon,” she chirped.

“And I’ll still bring you that water,” she added with a wink your way before heading off.

You looked down at the menu, flipping it over to look at the entrees. The menu wasn’t huge but they had a lot of options to choose from. As your eyes scanned, you could feel eyes on you and glanced up through your lashes to find Joshua already doing the same. He glanced back down, a smirk tugging at his lips. You looked back down, trying to finalize your decision.

“I can’t choose,” you heard him say softly. “I’m stuck between the tuscan-grilled sirloin or the mezzaluna,” he added, glancing up to meet your gaze. “Well they have an option to do both,” you offered, looking over the combinations. “You could get a 7 oz sirloin and a half order of mezzaluna,” you read off the menu. “That way you don’t have to choose.”

Joshua nodded as he looked at the menu. “What are you getting?” he asked softly, looking up once more. “The chicken,” you answered, setting your menu down as the host returned, setting two glasses of water down. You thanked her and picked it up, taking a sip. “Which chicken?” Joshua asked as he lifted his own glass, keeping his eyes trained on you.

Before you could answer, the server arrived. She was around the same age as the hostess and looked like she could be an older sister. “Hey,” she said breathlessly and you could only assume she’d been running all over the restaurant, serving multiple tables. “Your drinks should be coming from the bar in just a moment,” she said as she pulled out a pad and a pen. “Would you like to start with an appetizer?” she asked, looking between the two of you.

Before you could say anything, Joshua answered.

I’d actually like to get an order of the cozze in bianco,” he said without even looking at the menu. “I’ve tried just about every other starter but I haven’t tried the mussels,” he added. The server smiled as she jotted that down. “They’re really good,” she answered. “I’m not just saying that cause I work here,” she continued. “They’re genuinely delicious. It’s my grandma’s recipe,” she added.

You looked up, intrigue written across your face. “You’re part of the family?” you asked. She nodded with a proud smile. “Fourth generation,” she clarified. “My great grandparents started the place. My grandparents just retired and now my uncle and dad are running the place,” she explained, pointing at two men behind the bar.

“My sister is one of the hosts,” she added, pointing to the host stand where the hostess who had seated you stood. “I thought you might be related,” you said with a triumphant smile. It felt good knowing your instincts were spot on. “Yeah!” the server said. “Anyway, I’ll get this in,” she said, tapping the pad with her pen. “Then I’ll grab your drinks and come back to take your meal order,” she added with a smile and an “I’ll be right back.”

Once she left, Joshua turned to look at you. “I guess it really is a family business,” he said with an amused tone. You nodded, uncertain of what to say. Silence fell over the two of you as you waited for the server to return. You glanced up from the menu to find Joshua reading over the list of wines. “So,” you said softly, drawing his attention away from the paper.

“You’ve been here a lot?” you asked. Joshua smiled, setting the wine list down. “Been here? Sort of,” he answered. “This place is right around the corner from the shop,” he started to explain as you took another sip of water. “It’s perfect for getting carryout,” he added. “I’ll just call and place an order and then come pick it up and take it home.”

You listened patiently as he explained. “I don’t go out much,” he continued. You tilted your head as he spoke. “How come?” Joshua looked up from the table, eyes meeting yours. “I don’t know many people,” he admitted softly. “So you just stay in your apartment?” you questioned.

He nodded slowly. “Sometimes I go visit my aunt but my cousin recently moved back in with her and we don’t exactly…” he trailed off, thinking of the right words. “Get along.” Before you could ask any more, the server returned with your drinks, setting the wine in front of Joshua and the cocktail in front of you.

“So,” she said with a smile as she pulled out her notepad and pen. “What can I get you?”

After ordering, your conversation with Joshua shifted to other things. You talked about what he did in his spare time, discussing his taste in movies, books, and more. It was the most you’d ever gotten the chance to speak to him but it was nice to learn more about the man you spent half your day with four days a week. You wanted to consider Joshua a friend and hoped he could do the same.

The food was amazing. The mussels were cooked to perfection and though you were never big on them, Joshua got you to try at least one and you were surprised by how good it was. Your meals arrived just as you were finishing the last of your appetizers.

His steak looked incredible and he’d asked for marsala sauce on top. Your chicken was juicy and tender and the lemon butter sauce was perfect. You were glad you decided to forgo the capers in the end. The portions were just right and you were left feeling full but not stuffed at the end.

As your server took your empty dishes, she asked if you had saved room for dessert. Joshua glanced at you. “We’ll look over the menu,” he said and she nodded, moving to take your empty plates away. Joshua looked over the dessert menu. “I don’t think I could any more,” you commented. “Not without hating myself afterwards.” Joshua snorted and handed the menu to you.

“We could always split something,” he offered. 

You looked over the page, eyes scanning the sheet. There were staples like tiramisu and cannolis but there were also unique twists on traditional pieces like a cannoli cake. You spotted a chocolate cake as well as cheesecake. “I’m not sure,” you said softly, drawing your bottom lip between your teeth before handing the menu back. “You decide. I’m sure whatever you pick will be delicious,” you added.

Joshua looked over the menu as the server returned. “Made a decision?” she asked to which Joshua nodded. “One slice of the cannoli cake,” he answered, handing her the menu. “We’ll take it to go,” he added and she nodded, moving to put in the order and bring the check. You moved to open your bag but Joshua stopped you. “This is on me,” he said as he pulled out his wallet.

“No, it’s okay!” you said as you pulled your own wallet out. Joshua shook his head. “I insist,” he said more firmly. “I asked you to join me. It’s my treat,” he continued. Sensing you weren’t going to win this argument, you let him have his victory.

When the server returned with the check, Joshua immediately handed her his card and she walked away. While she was gone, you replaced your wallet in your bag and looked up to meet Joshua’s gaze. “Thank you,” you said softly. “For dinner.” Joshua returned the smile as the server returned with his card and the cannoli cake slice already bagged up.

Joshua signed the slip as the server smiled at you. “How was everything?” she asked.

“Oh it was amazing,” you answered as you finished your cocktail. “Better than I remembered,” you added. “Thank you so much,” Joshua said as he slipped a couple bills out of his wallet and tucked them behind the signed slip and handed them to the server. “The food and the service was incredible as always,” he added. The server thanked both of you before walking away.

Joshua stood up and grabbed his coat. You stood up quickly, gathering your things as he grabbed the togo bag and led the way to the door.

Outside, the sun had fully set behind the trees and the streetlamps outside had turned on. You pulled your coat on, noticing the chill that had set in. Joshua had already pulled his coat on and was watching as you slung your scarf around your neck. “Well, I should get home,” you said breathlessly. 

Joshua gave you a peculiar look. “Don’t you want to come up and try this?” he asked, holding up the to-go bag. “We got it to split,” he reminded you.

Although your gut was telling you this was a bad idea, you agreed and followed Joshua down the sidewalk and around the corner. The shop loomed over the both of you in the darkness, only one dim streetlamp illuminating the space in front of it as Joshua reached the door and pulled out his keys.

He unlocked the door and stepped in, allowing you to enter after him. As he shut the door your eye fell on the basket on the counter. You were almost one hundred percent certain that hadn’t been there when you both left earlier. “Uh… what’s that?” you asked as Joshua closed and locked the door.

He looked to where you were pointing, setting the bag on the counter and moving to the basket.

“It almost looks like Mrs. Briggs basket,” he said as he grabbed the handle and pulled it towards him. “But the items are different.” You watched as he sifted through the items. “Could you uh…” he asked, turning to look at you. “I hate to ask since we’ve already closed up and it is pretty late, but could you inventory this for me?,” he continued. 

“I really should learn how to do it myself.”

You nodded, moving around the counter to grab your pad and pen. You watched as he pulled each item  out and set them on the counter. “None of these items are the same as the ones Mrs. Briggs brought earlier,” you said softly as you started to write down the items and the descriptions.

Your eyes fell onto a small statuette and you set your pen down before grabbing it and looking at it.

In the low light you could tell it was very old. It was a small animal statue. The material you couldn’t discern but it almost felt ceramic. It was a cute little calico kitty. You looked it over but couldn’t find any manufacturer or name. “Huh,” you huffed as you set it down, drawing Joshua’s attention.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. You looked up at him. “This little statue,” you replied, gesturing to the cat. Joshua picked it up and turned it to face him. “What about it?” he asked. You shrugged. “I don’t know actually,” you said softly. “It just caught my eye.”

Joshua glanced up at you and back to the figurine in his hand. He set it back down in front of you. “Tell you what,” he said softly. “You can have it.” You looked up from the notepad, eyes wide. “What? Really?” you asked. He nodded and shrugged. “It’s just a little cat figurine,” he added. “Keep it,” he said.

You thanked him and went back to finishing inventorying all the items. When you were done and the basket packed back up save for your little calico figure, you followed Joshua up to his apartment where he started to unpack the slice of cake. The two of you stood around the kitchen island. “Here,” Joshua said, handing you a fork and using his own to take a bite.

You watched as his eyes fluttered shut, sighing in contentment. “That’s really good,” he murmured, turning to find you watching him. “Try it,” he urged, pushing the plate towards you. You gently stabbed your fork into the cake and brought a piece up to your mouth, fully aware Joshua was watching you intently. It felt oddly intimate, having him watch you so keenly.

Once you tasted the cake, however, his interest in watching you was made clear.

“Wow,” you said through a mouthful of cake, covering your mouth with your hand and looking up to meet his gaze. “That’s really good!” Joshua smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “I know!” he exclaimed, taking another bite. The two of you continued to take bites of the cake until there was one little piece left. 

You held your hands up and moved to the kitchen sink, rinsing your fork and placing it with the other dishes. “I’m done!” you said as Joshua turned. “The last bite is yours though,” he said with a frown. You shook your head. “No,” you said softly. “I’m good. You can have it.”

Joshua shook his head, moving to stand beside you. “No,” he replied, holding the piece for you. “It’s yours.” You looked from the piece of cake up to his face. He was waiting patiently for you to take the bite and although your gut was telling you this was a bad idea, you took the plunge anyway.

His eyes never left your face as you pulled back, chewing and swallowing the last bite of cake. “Okay,” you said, looking up. “Now I’m-”

Your words were cut short by Joshua pulling you in, lips crashing against yours. You moaned into the kiss as his lips parted yours, tongue slipping into your mouth. All you tasted was cake and saliva. He’d abandoned the plate the second you accepted his advances, discarding it on the counter behind you as one hand moved to your hip, the other staying put on the back of your neck.

Joshua guided your body away from the sink and against the kitchen island. You groaned as the counter dug into your back, a sound that Joshua swallowed as he deepened the kiss. “Fuck,” you hissed as his lips left yours, trailing over your cheek and down the side of your neck.

Without warning, he pulled back, spinning you to face the rest of the room, pushing you against the counter as he grinded against you, allowing you to feel his hard cock. “You have no idea how crazy you drive me,” he growled, one arm wrapping around your chest and holding you against him as he rutted against you. You let out a feeble moan, hands moving up to grab his arm as your legs threatened to give out under you. “J-Joshua,” you whimpered.

Your voice must have snapped him back to reality and just as quickly as it started, Joshua pushed away from you, facing the sink and gripping the sides as he tried to control his breathing. “Oh my god,” he breathed. “I’m so sorry.” You turned to face his back, hands on the counter behind you as you steadied yourself. “Wh-what just happened?” you panted.

Joshua shook his head and when he spoke again, his voice sounded strained. “I think you should go.”

Your brows knit together in confusion. Was he… kicking you out? After all that?

“What?” you whispered. Joshua raised his head but still didn’t turn to look at you.

“You should go home,” he said, his voice still strained. “This is wrong.”

You stared at the back of his head incredulously. He practically jumped you at the sink and almost bent you over the island of his kitchen and now he was backpedaling? You said nothing, instead grabbing your coat and scarf from the seat you left them on and headed for the door, yanking it open before stepping out onto the landing and slamming the door behind you.

Your footsteps were loud, echoing as you ran down the old wooden steps and into the back room of the shop.

Up front you reached the door in record time but stopped as something caught your eye. The little cat figurine was sitting on the counter, staring back at you. In a split second decision, you grabbed it. He had said you could keep it after all.

The bell rang softly as you exited the shop, slamming the door behind you and hurried down the sidewalk and around the corner. You stopped for a moment to catch your breath before continuing on.

It was late. Really late you noticed as you walked in the direction of your home. The shops and restaurants had all closed for the night and there wasn’t a soul to be found as you walked down the deserted street. 

The shops to your left were all dark, only a couple with running lights on in the back of the shop. On the right side, across the street was the park. It covered a good portion of the town, stretching for several blocks. The park was home to the playground, a pond, a dog park, and lots of walking trails.

It was covered in trees and lots of shrubbery. It was a lovely place to walk and visit all year round but right now it felt menacing and looming. You tried not to focus on it as you continued down the path before you, clutching the cat statue tightly in your hands.

It didn’t take long for you to finally reach your home, ignoring the chilly breeze that followed as you let yourself in and shutting the door behind you. It was an older home, built back before the town grew up. It was a family home, one you inherited from your parents after their passing. It was a cute craftsman style home with four bedrooms. You’d closed off the bedrooms upstairs, taking up residence in the master bedroom on the main floor.

You locked the door, listening for the click of the lock as it engaged before finally settling and feeling relieved. You shrugged your coat off and pulled the scarf from around your neck, hanging both up by the door before kicking your shoes off and heading into the living area.

You set the cat statue on the kitchen counter and moved to your fridge to grab some water. You always kept a few bottles of water in the fridge. Turning as you uncapped the bottle and started to sip, you jumped slightly at the glowing eyes peering in at you from the back window.

Once you realized it was only a cat, you berated yourself for overreacting and downed some more water before moving to the bedroom but only after making sure the doors and windows were locked.

In the safety of your room, you drew the blinds and curtains, quickly undressing and pulling on your pajamas. Your bed was all but calling your name as you pulled back the covers and climbed in, settling under the comforter as the exhaustion of the day weighed down on you.

You fell into a deep slumber, one you didn’t even remember falling into.

Your alarm woke you up at 630 on the dot and you groaned, lifting your head to peek at the red numbers. You really did not want to get out of bed. Mostly because you were comfortable in your warm cocoon and because the events of last night were flooding back in and you weren’t sure if you could even face Joshua after that. 

You knew staying in bed and wallowing in your misery wasn’t going to help so as much as you didn’t want to, you turned your alarm off, threw the covers off your body and started to pull yourself from the depths of your bed.

As you sat up, you grabbed your phone sitting on the nightstand beside your half empty bottle of water.

Unlocking the screen you found you had a text waiting for you. From Joshua.

Your heart hammered in your chest as you tapped on the icon to read what he had to say.

Joshua: hey, don’t worry about coming in today. The shop is closed for some repairs. You’ll still get paid so don’t worry about that either. I’ll see you Monday

Your stomach dropped into your lap as you read his messages. So he couldn’t face you either? You weren’t sure what kind of repairs the shop could need. There wasn’t anything you noticed in the last few days. You chose to avoid deciphering what he meant and instead to use the day to get things done.

As you got up and started your morning, you took a shower and changed into clean clothes, opting for a light caramel colored sweater and light denim jeans. You gathered up your dirty clothes and took them to the small laundry room off your kitchen, setting a load and going about the rest of the house, cleaning and putting things back where they belonged.

Time ticked by as you worked, stopping briefly to take a lunch break when you realized you were low on groceries. Deciding to swap your washed clothes over to the dryer first, you set out from the house, donning your cream colored long coat but forgoing the scarf. Today was much warmer than the previous day. 

Your walk from your neighborhood to the market only took a couple minutes and you greeted the cashier at the front as you entered and grabbed a bright yellow shopping trolley. You wheeled your cart through the aisles, grabbing items from your list off the shelves and crossing them off as they landed in the basket. You had just turned into the cereal aisle when you stopped dead in your tracks.

Halfway down the aisle was Joshua. He was smiling as he handed a box from the top shelf to an elderly woman. You couldn’t see her face so you didn’t know which resident it was. You tried to back up and head for another aisle but in your haste, you bumped into the display next to you, knocking a few cans of beans off the shelves.

Joshua and the woman heard the commotion and looked in your direction. ‘Oh brilliant,’ you thought to yourself as you knelt down to pick up the stray cans that rolled across the tile. As you stood up, Joshua and the woman had parted ways and he was currently walking in your direction.

You turned away as he approached, setting up the cans and trying to mimic the display they’d been in before.

“Hey,” you heard Joshua say softly. You turned to face him, forcing a smile. “Hey,” you mimicked.

The two of you said nothing, instead standing awkwardly before one another, looking anywhere that wasn’t the other person. ‘Why is this so awkward? Why are you even still standing here? Just walk away!’ You cleared your throat and forced another smile, laughing awkwardly as you took the handle of your trolley. “Well, I gotta go,” you said, your voice much higher pitched than before.

Joshua’s eyebrows shot up as you started to turn your cart and push it past him. He was quick, grabbing your wrist and turning you to face him, backing you up against the shelf of canned beans. Your breath caught in your throat as Joshua looked at you, eyes studying your face.

You saw them briefly look down to your lips and back up. Finally he spoke.

“I’m sorry about last night,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know what came over me.” you shook your head quickly. “It’s fine,” you squeaked. “Alcohol does that sometimes,” you added after clearing your throat. Joshua nodded, eyes still fixated on your lips as you spoke. “It doesn’t have to mean anything,” you continued.

The shift in his expression was unmistakable but you couldn’t tell what emotion he was conveying. “It… doesn’t?” he asked softly. You shimmied out of his grip, straightening your coat as you heard voices enter the aisle you were currently standing in. “No,” you replied. “It doesn’t.”

Joshua opened his mouth to respond but you stopped him. “Don’t worry about it,” you added. “Let’s just forget it. I’ll see you on Monday.”

You didn’t let him speak as you hurried away, pushing your cart into the next aisle to finish your shopping. You were grateful he didn’t attempt to follow you and luckily you didn’t see him again, which allowed you to return to the cereal aisle and grab a box of your favorite brand.

After visiting the dairy section, you headed to the front to check out. The next stop was the butchershop where you grabbed your usual cuts of chicken, pork, and beef before heading home to stock your fridge as well as fold and put away your clean laundry.

The task took longer than you were expecting and by the time the last towel was neatly tucked and folded, you saw that it was getting close to dinner time. You sighed, glancing at your fridge upon realizing you hadn’t prepared anything you bought yet.

You got up and walked over to the fridge and opened the door, looking at the contents and settled on one of the flank steaks you’d bought earlier. You grabbed the package and pulled it from the fridge as well as a couple other items and started with rinsing the vegetables you selected.

As you set the items on the counter, the small kitten figure caught your eye. You’d yet to find it a home in your place and moved to pick it up. As you did, a small portion of the bottom fell off onto the counter with a soft clatter and you cursed under your breath. It seemed as if the statuette had a small seal on the bottom that had seemingly come loose.

You turned the figure upside down and your eye caught the end of something shoved into the tiny space inside the ceramic figure. You carefully removed what turned out to be a rolled up piece of paper and set the figure down to start unrolling the paper.

Blackish text written in what you could only assume was a dark red ink adorned one side of the paper. You weren’t sure what it said but you could tell it was a different language. Possibly latin. Your brows furrowed as you read the words in your head before trying to sound them out.

“Te invoco a profundus inferni,” you read off in what you could only assume was terrible latin. You studied the paper for a moment longer before shrugging and turning to your trash bin, crumbling up the paper and tossing it away.

‘Out of sight, out of mind.’

Once rinsed, you started to prepare the potatoes, slicing them thinly before adding them to a glass baking dish. You worked over the dish and the stove simultaneously, making a cream sauce to add to the potatoes before sprinkling some cheese and panko over the top and putting in the oven.

While that baked, you poured yourself a glass of wine and turned on some music on your phone. The bottle was a new one you picked up earlier. While sipping on the wine, you prepared the steak for cooking, seasoning both sides since you didn’t have time to marinate it.

Soft jazzy tunes floated through the air as you went about the kitchen, heating a skillet before adding the steak which started sizzling immediately. You sipped on some more wine as you waited to flip the steak over. Your mind wandered as you waited, wondering what Joshua was up to before you forced the thought out of your head.

‘Stop thinking about him!’

You continued to listen to the music as your steak cooked, sizzling again when you flipped it onto the uncooked side. Once the steak was cooked to your liking, you pulled it from the pan and set it aside to rest while you checked your potatoes and added the chopped veggies to the hot pan, drizzling them with some oil. It was something you learned from your mother.

Once you were sure your veggies were done, the timer for the oven went off and you made a plate for yourself, sitting down at the kitchen island to eat. You had a dining room but as you lived alone, you saw no point in using the table. You could just eat at the island instead.

Just as you were cutting into the steak, you heard the doorbell ring and turned to look at the front door which you could just see from your spot. You waited for a moment before it rang again and you got up quickly, moving to answer it.

Pushing the curtain covering the window beside the door aside, you peered out onto the front step but saw no one. You contemplated opening the door but decided against it and instead looked through the peephole.

Again, you saw no one standing on the other side.

You took a step back, staring at the door in confusion until your thoughts were interrupted by three sharp knocks. You stared at the door and moved quickly back to peer through the hole. Again, the front step was empty. You moved to peer through the curtain but still saw nothing. You turned the deadbolt and backed away from the door, staring at it for a few moments more.

When nothing happened, you turned to head back to the kitchen to finish your dinner.

Just as you crossed the threshold into the living room, three loud knocks rang out from the door, causing you to whip around and head back to the door. This time you unlocked and opened the wooden door, leaving the metal storm door securely closed and locked.

Outside, just as you suspected, was no one. The street was deserted as the sun set behind the trees, casting everything in a bluish glow. The twilight glow. You peered out at your front porch, looking from side to side but not opening the outside door.

Seeing no one, you stepped back and shut the door, locking it once more before stepping back and waiting to see if someone knocked again. You weren’t sure what you were expecting, you hadn’t seen anyone before so why would you see anyone this time?

As you were wondering, you heard something different. Loud, heavy footfalls on the steps outside, almost like someone stomping up the steps to your porch. Before you could move to throw open the door to confront the trickster, three loud pounds sounded at the door, the strength of it shaking the floor of your vestibule.

Your eyes widened, heart hammering in your chest as you backed away. Another three pounding slams sounded on the other side of your door. Followed by three more. You rushed to the door and as soon as your hand fell on the handle it all stopped.

You didn’t dare open the door this time. Instead, you made sure the front door was locked before going around the rest of the first floor to make sure all the doors and windows were secured and properly locked. When you were certain they were, you headed upstairs to check the windows and attic door.

Upon reaching the landing, you were horrified to see that the attic door was cracked open. Your breath caught in your throat as you stared at the door, unmoving. You felt a cold chill run up your spine. Although you couldn’t see anything, you knew someone was looking back at you from the darkness.

You watched in horror as the cracked attic door slowly shut on its own. You blew off your sweep of the second floor of your home before running downstairs and grabbing your phone to call the police. As you waited for the operator to pick up you felt a breeze and looked to see your back door was open.

‘I just locked that!’ You were certain you’d locked that before going upstairs. You’d even done the tug test on it. The line clicked and you were greeted with the sound of breathing.

“Hello?” you asked into the receiver frantically. When no one answered but the breathing started to turn into distorted voices and then a deep rumbling growl you hung up and dropped your phone onto the counter next to your plate.

The corners of your eyes burned as you wandered cautiously towards the open door. You peered out the door into the dark and in an instant, you could have sworn your heart stopped. Your breathing sped up as you tried in vain not to hyperventilate.

Standing outside your door, just beyond the reach of the back porch light was a dark figure. There were no distinguishing features, no eyes, nothing to tell you anything other than the fact that someone… or something, was standing outside your door.

Without thinking, you rushed the door and slammed it shut, turning the lock before backing away.

The shrill tone of your phone sounded out and you rushed to pick it up without checking the screen.

“Hello?” you all but shouted. “Ma’am this is [xxx]. We received a call from this number moments ago. Do you have an emergency?” relief flooded your body as you almost passed out from the stress.

“Yes!” you said quickly. “I think someone is in my attic,” you answered. No sooner than you said those words, you heard a loud crash from upstairs. “He might have left the attic and is in the house,” you whispered, your body starting to shake.

“Can you give me your address?” “It’s Y/N,” you said quickly before giving your address. The town was small and the police station wasn’t far from your home. You knew an officer would be by in no time. “Okay Y/N,” the dispatcher said. “I have two officers enroute. In the meantime, can you find a weapon and a place to hide?”

Your eyes landed on the huge knife you’d used to cut your steak earlier and grabbed it quickly. “I have a knife,” you announced softly to the dispatcher who commended you. “Now you need to find a place to hide. Can you do that?” he asked. You tiptoed softly towards your bedroom, keeping your eyes on the bottom of the stairs before finally reaching the threshold and closing your bedroom door.

You turned the lock and made for your closet, squeezing in and sliding the door shut.

“I’m in the closet in my bedroom,” you whispered to the dispatcher. “Where is your bedroom located?” he asked. “Ground floor, back of the house behind the kitchen,” you whispered back. “Please tell them to hurry!”

You listened as the sounds of slow heavy footsteps pounded across the floor above you, heading for the stairs. “I think they’re coming downstairs!” you hissed. “Okay, Y/N,” the dispatcher said calmly. “The officers are almost there. I’m going to stay on the line but you need to be quiet for me, can you do that?” 

You nodded and hummed in the affirmative as the heavy steps made their way down the stairs, one step at a time. Each slam had you jumping. You were shaking as you listened, keeping the knife ready to lash out. To your horror, the steps started to walk through the first floor and sounded like they were making a beeline for your room.

You tried to control your breathing as the steps stopped just outside your bedroom door.

You waited for there to be banging or for the door to fly open but neither happened. Instead, there was a rapid knocking at your front door followed by the sound of the front door opening and a voice calling out “police!” you waited for the bedroom door to open and the closet door to slide aside as a light was shown in. “I found her,” the holder of the light said as you held up your hands.

The knife was taken from you and the officer helped you up. After they escorted you out of the house, one officer spoke while another two searched the house bottom to top, clearing each room and even going up into the attic. While the officers searched your home, you gave your statement to the officer who wrote down everything you said.

“And you’re sure you locked all the doors?” he asked, looking up from the notepad. You nodded again. “It’s just that when we arrived, both front doors were unlocked,” he explained. You stared at him blankly. “That’s not possible,” you replied. “I know I locked that door. Multiple times,” you explained.

“Someone was ringing and then kept knocking but each time I checked, there was no one there. I thought it was just kids getting into the Halloween spirit and being a nuisance. Until the pounding,” you continued. The officer narrowed his eyes. “Pounding?” he asked. You nodded as the two officers exited you home.

“Y-yeah,” you answered. “It started as light knocking but when I refused to open the door or come out onto the porch, it turned into pounding. I heard loud stomping up the steps but when I checked, I still saw nothing.”

The officer nodded as he jotted that down while one of the two officers came over.

“We found no sign of forced entry,” she started to explain. “We found a stack of boxes in the attic had fallen over. That was probably the loud crash you heard,” she continued. “Your back door was also unlocked.” Your jaw dropped. “I know I locked that!” you exclaimed. When I came downstairs to call you, the back door was open and when I walked over, I saw someone standing outside-”

“You saw someone outside?” the officer originally taking your statement asked. You nodded quickly as he started writing down more notes. “What did they look like?” You sighed heavily. 

“I-I didn’t get a good look.” 

Both officers exchanged looks as you rushed to explain further. 

“They were standing just outside the light field,” you explained. “But they were tall. Maybe around 1.8 meters,” you explained. “Everything else was just black. There were no distinguishing features at all,” you added. The officers nodded. “Ma’am,” the woman started and you turned to her.

“We noticed an open bottle of wine in the fridge,” she stated and you knew where she was going. “I just opened it,” you explained. “I hadn’t even finished a glass yet,” you added. She nodded and the other officer quickly jotted that down as well. 

“Well, other than the boxes in the attic,” she started. “There are no signs of anyone inside the home. Since the points of entry were unlocked, they must have gone out that way before we got here.”

You shook your head silently. “I heard them walk up to the bedroom but I never heard footsteps leave.”

The officers exchanged looks before the woman spoke again. “We’ll have a patrol car in the area for the night and if anything else happens, call us immediately,” she explained as she pulled a card out of a little pouch on her belt. “You can call me directly,” she added. “I’m on duty all night.”

The female officer walked you to your door where you thanked her and watched as both cars pulled away and headed down the street. A chilly breeze blew through the front porch followed by a distant flash of lightning and you quickly retreated inside, making sure your doors were locked before heading to the back door to do the same.

Once you were fully satisfied your doors were locked, you returned to the kitchen to clean up your dinner, putting the uneaten portions in a glass container and putting it in the fridge. You downed the rest of your wine and started to rinse your dishes, placing them in the dishwasher before turning off the lights and heading upstairs to make sure all the lights were off, windows closed and locked.

Before heading back down, you turned back to look at the attic door which was firmly shut. You headed down the steps carefully, turning off the light at the bottom landing before heading to your bedroom where you checked your windows.

Once you were sure everything was secure, you changed and got ready for bed.

Climbing under the covers, you weren’t sure if you’d be able to sleep but exhaustion took over and you were out within minutes of crawling into bed.

You were in the midst of a really good dream when you were startled awake by a loud crash and sudden burst of wind. Sitting up, you looked around the dark room and saw one of your windows had sprang open. ‘How the hell did that open?’

You threw the covers off your legs and got up, moving around the bed ro quickly shut the window, clicking your tongue as you stepped in a wet puddle on the wood floor.

The crash you had heard was thunder and a full blown storm was raging outside. You groaned and turned back towards the room as a flash of lightning illuminated the space causing you to stop in your tracks. In the corner by the door stood a tall, dark shadow.

Your heart hammered in your chest, beating almost up into your throat as it closed, your ability to scream being ripped from you. ‘No,’ you thought. ‘This can’t be happening.’

You glanced at the door but knew deep in your heart that you’d never make it to the door, not with the shadow standing right beside it. Maybe you could climb out the window? Damn! You should have left it open! If only you’d seen the shadow before closing the window!

As you weighed your options, a deep, gravelly voice spoke.

“C̸̫͕̿̀̎̈́̈ͅȗ̶̠̳͉̽ṟ̴͖͛̈́̂̓͠ ̶̞͈̈́̌̄̋͂c̵̪̱̆͂̃u̵̡̪̜̠̣͗͒ř̵̤̠͕͈̉r̵̺̙͙͍̦͂̐i̸͈̜͕͙͐́̑̾t̸̨̩͖̣͖̀̑i̵̯͖̼̓͌͛̑s̴̭̐̍̚̚͠ ?”

You stared at the shadow in the corner. Did… did it just speak?

Uncertain if you heard correctly, you waited for it to speak again, although you had no idea what it said.

“M̶̳̞͖̓ͅỏ̷̮̲̯̚r̴̭̹̈͋̀̎t̶͓̩̪̟̿̉̒́̅a̴͓͐̽͊l̸̲̰̯͛͛͠e̴̝͝m̵͕̱̾͋ ̸̫̩̾͜t̸̪͚͔͋e̴͕̠̘̖̅̍͊ ̶̝̞̌i̵̯̺̯̋̉̄ͅn̶̺̳͚̟̟̊́͆̀t̵̫͗̌̎̕͝e̸̗̋̚ṝ̴̺͇̉͗͗͠r̸̺̭̫͈̖̅̉o̷̟͙̥̱͗͌-̴̮̇ ̷͓́g̷̰̪͋͛̕͝ā̸̙͊̍v̴̭̙̜͋̾̊̚i̶̦̟͌͋̈́͛ .”

Your lips parted as it addressed you, still in the same language.

“I-I don’t understand,” you whispered. The shadow didn’t move but instead, in the same gravelly voice it spoke again, this time in English. “I asked you why you keep running away from me.”

Your stomach nearly fell out of your ass. Whatever this was, it was sentient. “Wh-who are you?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. The shadow figure chuckled. Actually fucking chuckled. The sound was distorted and unsettling.

“I am Tarrunach,” it answered. Your brain tried to wrap around the name. It was unlike anything you’d heard before. “T-Tarrunach?” you repeated. The figure said nothing and stayed perfectly still, another flash of lightning illuminating the room but still the shadow stayed black, a stark contrast with its surroundings.

“What do you want?” you asked softly, shifting your weight as your hand slowly reached behind you for the window latch. The shadow figure tilted its head before speaking in its rough voice.

“You summoned me.”

Your eyebrows shot up. ‘Summoned?’

You shook your head, halting your movements. “N-no I didn’t,” you answered. There was another flash of light and a clap of thunder. As soon as darkness returned to the room, the shadow figure shifted. Eyes appeared and it took all your willpower not to scream in terror at the sight of glowing red eyes.

“Is that the game you want to play?” it asked, voice scratchy and low. “You summoned me. Do you not remember the incantation?”

As you opened your mouth to say no, a memory played in your head, almost like a movie reel. The cat figure with the roll of paper inside. The strange words written in dark red ink. 

‘Te invoco a profundus inferni,’ Your eyes widened as the realization hit you.

You knew it was latin but you didn’t know latin. Had you…

Had you accidentally summoned a demon?

You looked back up and noticed the shadow figure had moved and was now standing in front of the door. You leaned back against the window, fingers searching for the latch to open them. 

“I-” you trailed off. “I didn’t know that was an incantation,” you admitted. “I thought it was gibberish.”

The figure laughed again. “Are you in the practice of reciting gibberish often?”

You shook your head. “No,” you answered. “Not particularly. I don’t see gibberish very often.”

You were stalling but the figure was moving closer. The flat black shadowy figure had taken on a more corporeal look, instead of blurry appendages, you could make out a curve in the arms by its side. Your fingers brushed against the latch but didn’t manage to catch on.

Another bolt of lightning streaked across the sky, throwing your room in a cast of bright white allowing you to see the figure in full. Your eyes widened, a scream forming in your throat.

Before you stood a blackened figure. The skin looked almost charred. The red eyes looked back at you from a charred face, the lips pulled back into a menacing smile with rows of sharp teeth. The figure was slim and androgynous in appearance. You saw nothing that would distinguish it as either sexually male or female. It was like one of the Ken dolls you’d had as a child.

Before the scream building in your throat could escape, your fingers managed to grab hold of the window latch and you pulled, opening the window. Instantly the wind blew in, the sound of rain intensifying and blowing into the open space. You tried to turn and climb out the window but the figure moved at an impossible speed.

The window was shut, all wind gone as the figure slammed you against the wall beside the window, hand closed around your throat. “This isn’t a game,” it growled in your face, breath hot against your skin. “You summoned me, whether intentional or not,” it hissed. “And I’ve come to collect.”

‘Collect?’

Fear filled your senses, spreading throughout your body and to the tips of your fingers and toes.

“C-collect?” you gasped, clawing at the hand around your neck. “Yes,” the figure snapped. Without warning, it tossed you onto the bed easily and was on top of you as you bounced on the mattress.

“C-collect what?” you coughed. “My soul?”

The demon tilted its head again only this time much faster, so fast you barely registered it except for the cracking sound that accompanied it. “I don’t want your soul,” it growled. You winced as it leaned in, sniffing your cheek before you felt its warm, wet tongue lick a stripe up the side of your face. You tried to push it away but the demon was much stronger.

“You can’t fight me off,” he laughed cruelly.

You felt your throat close up, tears burning at the corners of your eyes as the monster pinned you against the bed. “Please,” you whimpered. “What do you want from me?”

The demon chuckled again, the sound just as jarring. “I want your energy,” it answered.

You turned your face to look up at it in the dark, it’s red eyes boring into yours. “Energ-gy?”

“Your sexual energy,” it added. Your stomach churned at the thought. ‘No way. Absolutely not.’

You shook your head in agreement with your thoughts. “No,” you said defiantly.

The demon laughed, caging you in with its arms against the mattress. “I figured you’d say that,” it said, taking your face in its clawed hand. You stared up, raw fear pumping in your veins as your eyes met. You watched in both shock and horror as the charred skin of the demon melted away to reveal an all too familiar face.

You managed to push the demon off you and scramble off the bed towards the window as the demon stood up. You cowered away, your back up against the wall. “J-Joshua?”

The figure standing in your bedroom smiled at you, flashing a pair of perfect teeth. “Wh-what the hell?”

The demon started to pace back and forth, keeping its eyes trained on you. “What do you think?” it asked. “Looks just like him, right?” You stared in awe. “Or would you believe me if I told you I am Joshua?”

You shook your head quickly. “That’s not possible,” you croaked, your voice hoarse. the demon laughed and instead of the cruel, jarring sound, it was Joshua’s laugh. The one you’d heard countless times in Pandora’s Box as you told him a joke. The smile was the same one he gave you when he caught you staring at him from across the shop.

The same knowing smirk.

You shook your head again. “You’re not Joshua,” you answered. “You’re just messing with me!”

The demon tilted its head again. “That’s where you’re wrong,” it said in a low, menacing tone.

“Let me show you something,” it said, raising one hand and with a snap of its fingers, the lamps in your room came on. You looked around quickly before your eyes landed back on the demon.

“Is that it?” you asked. “I thought you were going to like, snap us to the shop or something,” you added.

The demon’s smile fell and its eyes narrowed.

“You want to go to the shop?” it asked. You nodded. “That’s where he lives,” you said. “The real Joshua!”

The demon sighed and rolled its eyes before standing up straight. “Get dressed,” it said, moving towards the door. You hesitated as it opened the bedroom door. Sensing you weren’t going to move, the demon stopped. “Get dressed,” it ordered again. “I’ll prove it to you.”

You pulled on a pair of sweats and a hoodie before heading out of your bedroom. It was surreal to see the demon masquerading as Joshua in your living room. You slowed to a stop as it walked around, looking around your house. “Nice place,” it said with a smirk. “How come you’ve never invited me here before?” he asked with a mocking tone. You narrowed your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.

Taking that as a cue you weren’t going to talk, the demon led the way to the door. “Shoes,” it said as it unlocked the deadbolt and looked at you. “We’re going to the shop.”

The walk down the deserted streets at night was eerie enough but the fact that a demon masquerading as your coworker was walking beside you as if nothing was wrong made it even more uncanny. The walk to the shop took no time at all and soon, you were walking up to the front door.

The demon produced a set identical to Joshua’s keys and unlocked the door. You led the way to the back where the door leading up to the steps was already open. You hurried up the steps to the top landing but before you could knock, the door opened and you fell into Joshua’s arms.

“Close the door!” you gasped, scrambling to shut the door behind you and lock it.

You looked up into the concerned brown eyes of your coworker. “Y/N,what’s wrong?” he asked. “It’s the middle of the night and it’s storming.” You glanced down to find your clothes were indeed wet but on your walk, you didn’t remember it raining. Though you did remember it raining when you were back in your bedroom.

“Here,” Joshua said, letting go of you and heading to the wardrobe that stood between the bathroom and the nightstand. “Let’s get you out of those wet clothes.”

You followed him, glancing around quickly. Nothing seemed out of place in the apartment. Joshua pulled out some clothes, holding up the large tee shirt. “This should fit,” he said softly. “It’s not my size.” He pulled out a pair or shorts as well, holding them up to inspect.

Once he’d found something that might fit, he handed them to you and directed you to the bathroom where you changed quickly. Out in the other room, Joshua was heating up a pot of water. He looked up as you approached. “Let me throw these in the dryer,” he offered, taking your clothes from you.

Once he put them in the dryer and poured you a hot cup of tea, you sat at the kitchen island, trying to come up with an explanation as to why you were there. What reason could you possibly have for coming to his place in the middle of the night.

‘I accidentally summoned a demon that wants to collect my sexual energy and it looks just like you.’

He’d call the cops faster than you could finish getting the words out.

Frustrated, you lowered your head and fought the urge to cry, your shoulders shaking. Joshua rounded the island and sat next to you, placing an arm around your shoulders. “Hey, hey,” he said softly. “It’s okay. You’re safe here.” You turned to face him, startling him.

“No one is safe,” you said softly. Joshua’s eyes searched your face. “What?” he said quietly.

“There’s…” your voice quivered as you hesitated. “There’s a demon.”

As soon as the words left your lips, the serious look on Joshua’s face morphed into a smile. “Oh Y/N, please,” he scoffed. “You know, you really are something,” he said, getting to his feet. You watched as he walked back around to his empty cup and moved to put it in the sink.

You got up and ran over to him. “Please, Joshua,” you pleaded. “I’m not messing around!”

When he didn’t respond, you tried to grab his hand. The moment your skin touched his you jerked back with a yelp. Almost like you’d been burned. ‘What the…’

You looked up from his hand to his profile. He slowly turned his head, eyes boring into yours. The brown eyes you’d looked into before were replaced with yellow irises, the sclera no longer white but red. The same eyes you’d seen in your bedroom. Your heart sank as Joshua slowly advanced on you.

“No,” you whimpered, a soft sob escaping you. You tried to run but the demon was quick, grabbing your arm and dragging you over to the counter, trapping you between its body and the kitchen island. “Stop!” you screamed, pushing against its hard chest. “Let me go!”

“I told you,” it said in the voice of Joshua. “I told you I am Joshua.”

You shook your head. “It’s not possible,” you sobbed, tears falling down your cheeks.

The demon took your face in both its hands gently. “I wasn’t lying. I am Joshua. Joshua is me.”

You glanced up to meet the fiery gaze once more. Behind the yellow and red eyes was a sincerity you hadn’t expected to see. The demon wasn’t trying to trick you. “H-how?” you hiccuped.

“How what?” he asked. “Did you not find it odd that I seemingly haunted every dream and waking thought of yours?” he asked. “Or how Mrs. Briggs didn’t recognize me?” You looked up at him. “Are you even related to Bill?” you asked softly. Joshua chuckled and shook his head. “Bill doesn’t have any siblings,” he answered.

“Why are you here?” you asked suddenly. “In this town. Why are you here?”

Joshua tilted his head. “Do you remember the night Bill passed away?” he asked, nodding when you shook your head. “It was a couple days before Halloween,” Joshua started to explain. “A couple of teenagers were out at the old covered bridge messing around with a ouija board.”

You listened as he told the story of the teens and how they inadvertently summoned him, bringing him to the town. That night, after they summoned the demon, they ran, leaving behind the Ouija board. Bill was driving home from the shop and had to cross that old wooden bridge. 

As he started to cross, Joshua explained how he appeared, causing Bill to swerve and plow through the side of the bridge and down into the ditch below. It wasn’t full but because there had been a lot of rain the past few nights, the ditch had been flooded more than usual and because Bill’s car landed upside down, he drowned.

As Joshua finished his tale, you covered your mouth in shock.

“And that little figure you took home,” he continued. “Why would I give you a random gift like that?” he asked. “I wanted you to have it. I wanted you to find the incantation. I wanted you to say it, knowing you were curious and had a proclivity for reading out random words you see,” he added.

Everything he was saying so far added up. Your dreams about him, your fantasies, your attraction, everything was caused by him. “Why did you need an incantation?” you asked suddenly, looking up to meet his gaze. “I wanted you before that.”

Joshua shook his head. “I’m a demon,” he explained. “I have rules and rituals to abide by.” 

The realization dawned on you. 

“That’s why you stopped the other night,” you said softly as it all fell into place. “Because you can’t just have sex with whoever you want?” Joshua nodded. “There has to be a binding incantation,” he explained. “Which is what you read off tonight.”

You swallowed thickly. “Which means…”

You felt one of his hands moved to your hip. “Which means, we have to have sex,” you continued.

Joshua nodded, leaning in and nuzzling your cheek. “Exactly,” he said in a low, husky voice. “But if we have sex,” you said suddenly, placing a hand on his chest and pushing him back. “Doesn’t that mean you have to leave?”

Joshua tilted his head questioningly. “Why would I leave?” he asked softly.

“When I have a shop to run.”

Without letting you say another word, Joshua took your lips in a searing kiss, his free hand moving up your back and pulling you into him. “I said that incantation binds me to you,” he murmured, lips ghosting over your skin. “I never said anything about having to leave. I’m bound to you now.”

Your knees almost buckled as you felt his teeth graze against the skin of your neck. “I’m yours,” he whispered, his breath hot against your skin. “And after tonight,” he continued, trailing kissing back up until his lips were against your ear. “You’ll be mine.”

You pulled him in for a heated kiss, leaning against the counter as one of your legs moved to wrap around his waist. Joshua leaned into the kiss, parting your lips and sliding his hot tongue into your mouth, muffling your moans.

You whined as he pulled away, slowly kissing down your neck to your collar before taking the hem of the shirt you were currently wearing and tugging it up, pulling the shirt off over your head. “Good girl,” he murmured, taking in your topless form. 

His hands were back on you in a second, lips trailing kisses down your collar and between your breasts. As he lowered himself to his knees, he made quick work of the shorts you were wearing, pulling them along with your panties down your legs before taking one of your thighs and lifting it over his shoulder.

You watched as he planted light kisses along the inside of your thigh, stopping just short of your aching heat. One of your hands braced yourself against the counter, the other moving down to tangle in his hair as he placed a kiss just above your clit before shifting between your thighs, pushing them further apart.

Your head fell back as you slipped to rest your forearm against the counter again as you felt Joshua’s tongue glide through your folds, brushing your clit lightly. Light teasing licks turned into heavy laps until he pulled back, his chin already covered in your essence. “Bed,” was the only word he uttered.

You were there faster than you could process, your head spinning with arousal as you leaned back against the sheets. Joshua had stripped himself of his shirt in the short distance from the kitchen to the bed and was lowering himself to kneel as you parted your thighs.

He fell onto the mattress, arms wrapping around your thighs and pulling your pussy closer to his face.

You moaned, head falling into the pillows as you felt his tongue back on your clit. He teased and toyed with the bud, not really falling into a rhythm. Instead he was merely taking his time and learning your body. Twice you felt the tip of his tongue dip down to your hole, pushing into it as his nose bumped against your clit. You felt the vibration of his groans against your sex, your walls tightening around the end of his tongue.

Just when you thought he was going to pull away, it was as if his tongue grew, entering you fully and filling your cunt. “Oh shit,” you cursed, fingers tightening in his hair as your free hand gripped the sheets beneath you tightly.

He only pushed his tongue into you a few times before pulling back. You raised your head wearily to see him licking his lips. “Already so fucked out?” he asked with a chuckle. He didn’t give you the opportunity to respond as he pushed two fingers into your cunt, watching your face as your lips parted in a silent moan.

Your eyes rolled back as he started to slowly pump his fingers in and out of you.

“That’s it,” he cooed as he curled his fingers, brushing against the soft spongy spot that had your toes curling. “You like that?” he asked, mildly amused by the response you were giving him despite him doing the bare minimum. “Yes!” you gasped as he continued to finger you. “F-fuck!” you swore. “Don’t stop!”

Joshua continued to watch your face as you writhed in pleasure under him. “Like that?” he asked, angling his hand so his fingers reached even further. “Yes! J-just like that!” Joshua leaned down, lips moving against yours, a mix of tongues, spit, and moans but you weren’t sure whose moans they were.

Joshua pulled away, keeping his eyes on your face as he sped up the pace. “Just like that?”

You nodded quickly, your body starting to shake as your orgasm approached but before it could crash over you, Joshua withdrew his hand. You whined at the loss of contact, making Joshua chuckle. “You’re falling asleep,” he noted. You pouted at him. “Don’t care,” you murmured.

Joshua tilted his head curiously. “Are you giving me permission to fuck you while you’re sleeping?” he asked. You nodded. It felt too good and you were so close you’d do just about anything to cum. “Yes,” you answered. “Feels s’good.”

Joshua chuckled against your skin, leaving feathery kisses against your cheek. “As you wish,” he said softly, gently rolling you onto your stomach. You felt his hands push your thighs apart and shuddered as you felt something hot and wet against your hole.

You assumed it was his tongue until it pushed into your cunt and you groaned into the pillows. It was most certainly not his tongue. “Wh-what’s that?” you murmured. You felt one of Joshua’s hands caress your cheek. “Shh, angel,” he said softly and you almost laughed at the irony of it.

A demon calling you angel.

You tried to lift your head to look back but it was too dark. “It’s okay,” you heard him purr in your ear. “Just go to sleep,” he added.

Your cheek fell back against the sheets as sleep started to take over your form. You felt whatever was inside you probing around and a sudden thought hit you. “Is that a tentacle?” you murmured, your voice partially muffled. Joshua chuckled, again in your ear as he leaned over you. “Yes,” he answered.

“It is.”

That snapped you awake. “Hng,” you grunted as the tentacle started to thrust in and out of you. “W-wait a second,” you whined. “I thought you…” you trailed off as Joshua halted his movement. “What’s wrong, baby?” he whispered. “I wanted your…” your words failed you again.

“You have to use complete sentences,” Joshua cooed in your ear. “I wanted your cock,” you finally whined. Joshua chuckled, the tentacle in you starting to slowly thrust. “Don’t worry sweetheart,” he replied. “You’ll get that, too.”

Your cheeks burned as the tentacle continued to pump into your pussy, gently bumping your cervix with each thrust. You felt another warm wet appendage against your ass and tried to reach behind you but Joshua managed to catch both hands and pin them to the bed.

“Shhh,” he murmured. “Just relax for me. Can you do that, angel?”

You moaned into the sheets as the second tentacle pushed into your ass, carefully stretching you open. Your fingers gripped the sheets tightly as the tentacle stopped, settling in your ass as the one in your pussy continued to move. The sensation was unlike anything you’d ever felt before.

“That’s my good girl,” Joshua whispered into your ear as the tentacle in your ass slowly started to move, setting an asynchronous pace to the first tentacle and soon both were thrusting into you. It wasn’t enough to build up an orgasm but it was enough to drive you insane.

You wanted more. You needed more.

You moaned into the pillows as the tentacles increased speed. “That’s it baby,” Joshua cooed. “You’re doing so well for me.” You were aware that the sheets were no doubt covered in your arousal and that a mess was being created between your thighs.

Joshua didn’t seem to mind. Without another word, the tentacles withdrew leaving you feeling empty. You let out a tiny yelp as Joshua wrapped an arm around your hips, pulling your ass up before taking one of the pillows and tucking it under your raised hips.

You moaned as he ran his hands over your ass, crying out when you felt him land a blow against the skin. He repeated this again, rubbing his hand over the spot each time. “Of course,” he murmured, more to himself than anything else. “Of course you’d like that, you little slut.”

You moaned at the degrading name, whimpering when you felt him push two fingers into your heat again. “I supposed you’re ready,” he added. Your body burned in anticipation as you felt the bed move. You had neither the energy or will to look and see what was happening but it didn’t matter.

As quickly as Joshua disappeared, he was back, kneeling behind you and spreading your cheeks with his hands. “Such a pretty little pussy,” he growled. “And it’s all mine.”

You moaned in response as he spit onto your waiting hole. The next thing you felt was the tip of his cock brushing against you. “I’m going to ruin this little pussy,” he growled in your ear. “Make it so mine is the only cock you can take.”

You whimpered as you felt his teeth dig into your shoulder before he straightened back up. You felt the head of his cock as it pushed slowly into you and suddenly, you knew why he prepped you with the tentacles beforehand.

Inch by inch, Joshua slid into you. Your body shook as your cunt stretched to accommodate his girth. As he bottomed out, you shuddered, walls clenching and unclenching around him. “So warm,” he breathed. “M’gonna wreck you,” he added, taking your hips in both hands before slowly drawing his cock out until just the tip was still inside you.

Without warning, he snapped his hips forward, making you scream into the pillows as he pushed all of his cock into you at once. The first few thrusts were the hardest but as he fell into a steady rhythm, the stinging pain was replaced with a dull ache. You could already feel your juices starting to roll down your thighs, no doubt mixed with sweat as Joshua pounded into you from behind.

You could feel the tip of his cock hit your cervix with each stroke. You cried out as he slammed into you.

He hovered over you, one hand on the mattress next to you and the other holding your hip. “You take cock so well, baby,” he growled. “It’s like you were made for this.”

You moaned loudly, tears and spit staining the pillow your face was currently buried in. Joshua grabbed the pillow and tossed it aside. “I want to hear you,” he rasped, hips hitting your ass as he thrust into you. “Wanna hear you scream for me and I split you open.”

Your cries filled the room with each slam of his hips, the sound of skin hitting skin the only other sound to be heard. Your fingers dug into the sheets, trying to ground yourself from the onslaught of his hips. “Mine,” you heard him growl. It was almost animalistic. As if to seal his claim, you cried out as you felt his teeth sink into your shoulder. The stinging pain of your shoulder combined with the feeling of his cock repeatedly dragging against your walls raw sent you over the edge and you came with a whimper, falling limp as he continued to fuck you.

More tears spilled as Joshua moved, his hips never faltering. “M’gonna fuck you so good,” he grunted. “Fuck you like you deserve. Fuck you until you’re full of nothing but my cum. Turn you into my own cum dumpster like the good little slut are.”

The sound of his almost angelic voice saying all those dirty things had your mind reeling as your second orgasm built up quickly, a low, deep moan escaping you as you came for a second time. “Such a good little girl,” he chuckled. His chest pressed against your back as he buried his cock fully inside you, pinning you to the mattress.

“You want that? You want me to fill you up? You want me to breed you?”

You moaned, hips pushing back against him, urging him to move again.

When he did it was fast and unforgiving. His thrusts were erratic. “Fuck,” he growled, his voice hitting a low you didn’t think possible. “Stay down,” he added, pinning you to the mattress as he pushed himself up with one hand. “Yeah,” he continued when you obeyed him. “Just like that.”

You felt his cock twitch and throb in your pussy, your walls fluttering around him as another orgasm washed over you. You’d lost count at this point how many you had but Joshua was nearing his own and you were left at his mercy as he chased his high, hips slamming into you as he growled and cursed in a language you didn’t understand.

As he finally started to come undone, he thrust once, twice, thrice more before burying his cock deep in your walls as he came, teeth sinking into your skin once more, marking you as thick ropes of his hot cum painted your walls and filled your cunt until it started to spill out.

You panted, breathing heavily against the sheets, ignoring the drool on your chin. Joshua shuddered as the last of his cum spilled into you. He let out one final groan before stilling completely. Your eyes fluttered shut as you heard him whisper into your ear but what he said you weren’t sure.

Everything faded to black.

You woke with a start and opened your eyes, sunlight filtering into your room and blinding you.

You groaned as you tried to roll over but your limbs were heavy and sore. It took more strength than usual to roll over. As you did, you caught sight of the alarm clock next to your bed but something was wrong.

It was on the opposite side. You lifted your head and stared at the alarm clock. The red numbers told you that it was just after nine in the morning. That was when you noticed the wall. It wasn’t your wall. You started to push yourself up, peering down at the sheets. They weren’t your sheets.

Just where the hell were you?

You sat up and looked around. This wasn’t your place.

Your gaze continued over the familiar surroundings but it wasn’t until it landed on a figure in the kitchen that everything clicked.

He smiled as he walked over carrying two plates and a mug of coffee.

You watched as he sat on the edge of bed, setting the coffee on the side table next to you before setting one of the plates in your lap. “Morning,” he said cheerfully, leaning in to kiss your cheek. “You seemed pretty tired last night,” he added. “So I let you sleep in.”

You looked around as you tried to process what waking up at his place meant. Did you two…?

Memories from the night before flashed before your eyes.

The demon in your room, showing up at Joshua’s place, the sex. You raised a hand up to your mouth as you realized what actually happened last night. You looked over at Joshua as he ate his own plate of pancakes. “Did we…?” you whispered looking up to meet his gaze. His eyes, which were brown, momentarily flashed red, and you knew instantly.

“We did indeed, doll,” he answered, returning his gaze to his plate.

“And you’re…?” Joshua nodded, looking up. “Yep. I’m a demon,” he answered nonchalantly.

“But I’m your demon,” he added. Your cheeks burned as he smirked at you.

“So I was thinking,” he continued to speak.

“Maybe we could move in together.”

You stared at him as he spoke. “I mean, since we’re bound to each other for eternity now, it just makes sense, you know?”

Your heart hammered in your chest, blood pounding in your ears. ‘Move in together?’

“And if we live together, we can have sex like every night.”

‘For eternity?’

“It would be perfect. It’s stupid for us to be apart anyway.”

You looked down at your plate as your pulse sped up.

‘What the hell have I done?’

ⓘ Graphics made by me. Content and support banners made using a template by cafekitsune. I do not allow reposts, translations, or continuations of my works. All writing and graphics are ©️ kwanisms.

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Silk & Spice [Teaser]

SUMMARY: You're here to forget your worries, and who better to help you than not just one but two beautiful men? Here's hoping you haven't bit off more than you can chew. PAIRING: incubi!jihan x fem!reader GENRE: smut (none this teaser), suggestive AU/TROPE: demon au WORD COUNT: 548 this teaser WARNINGS: party setting, evil twins evil twinning RATING: mature A/N: happy birthday to shua! i'd love to be posting the full version of this today, but my winter collabs have taken over my life. so here's a little teaser from the standalone prequel to the rest of the demonteen universe featured in my halloween mini collab with @justhere4kpop. huge shout out to @hobeemin for the banner and dividers <3 i am in love with them masterlist | join my taglist | buy me a coffee?

Your overly carefree attitude was what drew Joshua toward you in the first place, a hint of something sour lacing your otherwise pleasant scent. It was a front, clearly; one he fully intended to break through. He flashed a smirk over his shoulder as he dropped Jeonghan’s hand and carefully sidled up next to you, his brother following suit on your other side. Your eyes blinked open as your arm brushed against the elder, startling and stumbling back into Joshua’s chest. He reached a careful hand out to steady you, meeting your wide, doe-eyed stare with a soft smile.

“I’m so sorry, we didn’t mean to startle you,” he called over the music, holding his hands up in a peaceful gesture once you were steady. “You just looked like you were having so much fun, we were hoping we could join you.”

Your eyes narrowed warily, and Jeonghan flashed a smirk from over your shoulder, cocking an eyebrow at him in challenge. The look was gone quickly as you turned, letting your eyes drag over him before you returned it to Joshua, giving him the same treatment. On any normal night, you’d scoff and turn them away without a second thought. With your recent rejection fresh in your mind, though, the prospect of a night spent with one or both of the gorgeous men beside you was a very appealing one. Their presence was intoxicating already, and you felt yourself leaning subconsciously into them. Slowly, the tension in your body eased, a smirk spreading over your features.

“I don’t see why not.”

Joshua grinned, taking half a step closer to you as he finally let his gaze rake over your body. “Fantastic,” he practically purred, a glint of something mischievous in his eyes. “I’m Joshua, by the way.”

Before you could return his greeting, you were cut off, his friend’s arms settling loosely on your hips as he settled behind you. “Jeonghan,” he muttered, his breath sending a shudder down your spine. 

“Y/N,” you breathed, leaning back into him. “I’m Y/N. I take it you two are a package deal?”

They both chuckled to themselves as Joshua slotted himself in front of you, taking your hands and settling them on his shoulders. “You don’t seem too bothered by that.”

You hummed, shaking your head as you let yourself melt between the pair, the warmth of their bodies wrapping around you to dull the noise of the party. “Bothered? No. Curious, yes,” you hummed, reaching up to card a hand into Joshua’s hair. “Why do you need little ol’ me when you’ve got each other?” 

To your surprise, the quieter man behind you barked a laugh, his grip tightening on your hips. “You misunderstand, lovely. We’re not interested in one another. We just happen to have similar tastes.” You grinned, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. The darkness in his gaze sent a shudder down your spine. “And a penchant for competition.”

Breath catching in your throat, you turned your startled gaze back to the man in front of you. He wore a similar expression to his friend as he pressed further into your space, sandwiching you between them. “What do you say, darling? Care to find out who can please you better?”

© December 2023 nebulousbrainsoup | all rights reserved. reposting and translating of author’s work is prohibited.

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— eyes meeting, hearts apart ⟢

you could’ve fallen for the childhood friend who owns a flower shop, the singer who takes the stage of the bar every other day. hell, even the landlord’s flirtatious son could’ve been a better choice. but you can’t really help it if your heart longs for a prince who’s in love with somebody else.

★ FEATURING; joshua x reader

★ WORD COUNT; 30.2K words

★ TAGS; bartender!reader, requited unrequited love, immense pining, angst, flowers, slow burn, smut (MINORS DNI)

★ NOTES; first of all, this hellsite was bein difficult w the tags again so ta-da! reupload! that said, please take the pining tag seriously bc i think this has even MORE pining than the first fic in this series and it’s one-sided for a majority of the story :’) ++ this story is the continuation to promise ring, but can be read as a standalone!

★ A WORD IN THANKS; i can’t bear to start this fic without thanking @hwanghyunjinenthusiast <3 rj patiently went over and proofread this fic for me, providing extensively helpful feedback during the process of its creation! ngl i hit a LOT of walls with this given the complexity of the plot and extensive word count. if it weren’t for her, this fic would’ve taken ages to see the light of day.

this is part of the it’s complicated series.

★ SMUT TAGS; implied drunk sex, married sex, unprotected sex, oral (m&f receiving), vaginal fingering, breeding kink, creampie

★ PERMANENT TAGLIST; @cheolhub - @pretty-trustme - @just-here-to-read-01 - @ldkmelkro - @dejavernon - @venusrae - @jyiiscool - @jiniesclub - @junhui-recs - @bldelaine - @featmia - @fruitzcup - @hoeforhao - @candidupped - @billboard-singer - @caratochan - @novalpha - @dahliatopia - @0717luv - @shiveringgaze - @toruro - @mixling-blog @minnie-mouser22 - @homerunhansol - @mirtaspace - @ti--red - @zzucculent - @woozarts - @rubyreduji - @mozellerra - @lllucere

★ SERIES TAGLIST; @ophelia-enthusiast - @hanniemylittlelamb - @ryusha-rose - @thesunsfullmoon

P.S. i reserve the right to refuse to add you to my taglist if you don’t have any age indicators in your profile regardless of whether this work is sfw or not :^)

Closing time is possibly your favorite time of the day.

The pub is always teeming with noise once the evening patrons arrive and while you find yourself enjoying the easygoing commotion, the peace that closing time affords you is a gift like no other. 

Most of tonight’s customers have already seen themselves out—drunkenly slurring the songs that the veteran performer, Seokmin, graced them with today. The knights who spent their day off helping themselves to your signature Oak Walker were some of the last to leave. They gave a hefty amount of money as payment for their food and drinks and you figure that they must’ve secured their paychecks recently with how generous they are with the tips.

Now, it’s just you—clearing out tables and polishing glasses—and another person who’s more or less part of the pub’s employee roster with how frequently he lingers after hours. 

“What a day.”

At the sound of his voice, you turn to Jihoon with a tired smile. “You can say that again. I thought Seokmin was going to break his vocal chords from the number of songs the two of you played tonight.”

Jihoon, the one in charge of musical accompaniment for the pub’s most popular singer, chuckles before seating himself across one of the barstools. In turn, you pour him a drink despite having already cleaned most of the glasses lined up beneath the bar.

“As much as I’d like to limit our songs to five max per night, I can’t do anything about Seokmin being a people pleaser,” he sighs, bringing the glass to his lips for a sip. “That idiot… We were supposed to take a carriage back to our neighborhood together, but then he decided he wanted to chase after skirts tonight. Saw him leave with two ladies hanging off his arms.”

You spare him a chuckle. “Well, you musical magic users have been racking up the female market more than you think. Kazuha’s been crushing on one of her teachers at the Academy—some guy named Chris if I remember correctly. I’m not sure. All I know is that he teaches musical theory and that he’s way too old for her.”

Jihoon shakes his head. “Speaking of, isn’t your coworker too young to be working here?” 

“She’s the owner’s daughter. I don’t really have much of a say about her employment, even if it’s borderline illegal.”

“Point taken.”

The silence sets comfortably inside the empty pub as Jihoon finishes the rest of his drink. He isn’t much of a talker anyway—that’s Seokmin’s area of expertise. The only reason the musician struck up conversation was probably out of the need to be polite. You want to tell him that you’re used to closing up the pub alone so he doesn’t have to worry, but choose not to interrupt the peace and quiet that the two of you have been craving all night.

Once you’re done, you lean against the counter to let your eyes wander for a bit—mentally listing what liquor needs to be restocked, what finger food won’t be available the next day, among other things. The sound of the rain coming down outside makes your contemplation all the more immersive, and you’re just about to wonder if you should invite another singer for tomorrow—considering Seokmin’s…activities tonight—but Jihoon interrupts your train of thought with an odd question.

“Have you heard about the recent news?” 

You flash him a puzzled look. “There’s a lot going on in the royal capital, Jihoon. You need to be more specific.”

He rolls his eyes. “I’m talking about the youngest prince’s failed engagement. It’s been the talk of the entire pub all evening. I wasn’t surprised because the entire kingdom was plunged into madness when they announced that the wedding was going to be postponed. I don’t quite get the fanfare, though. What royals do with their love lives isn’t anyone’s business but theirs.”

If he notices the way you stiffen at his words, Jihoon doesn’t show it. You clear your throat, the relaxed expression on your face refusing to falter.

“Well, since they were so public about it, I guess us commoners have the right to at least scrutinize what they show us,” you offer. “But I totally understand not getting why they’re so worked up about it. I don’t pay much attention to those kinds of things either.”

“Right?” Jihoon sighs, exasperated as he takes a longer swig of his drink. “There are a lot more problems that people like us deal with everyday than the engagement of a little prince. Besides, isn't his older brother betrothed to some princess from another kingdom? They’re acting as if the royal bloodline is at risk of extinction.”

“You know, for someone who seems apathetic towards this whole mess, you’re awfully informed.” You flash him a teasing smile. “I didn’t even know Prince Jeonghan was betrothed in the first place. I thought all he did was terrorize the neighboring kingdoms while Prince Joshua cleaned up after him.”

“Our circle of musicians is full of gossip-mongers. I just happen to be there whenever they whisper about it amongst themselves instead of rehearsing,” he explains and you decide to let him off the hook with that one despite sounding just a tad defensive.

Jihoon gets up to make his leave once he finishes his drink—saying something about the rain not letting up anytime soon, so he should just pack up before it gets worse. But just when he’s about to reach for his wallet to pay—

“No need,” you insist before plucking the empty glass off the counter. “This one’s on the house. You worked hard today.”

His brows furrow. “Are you sure?”

“Positive. Just take care out there. Seokmin would be devastated if his partner got struck by lightning.”

“On the contrary, I think he’d be elated to know that he won’t have to come into work while I’m out of commission,” he chuckles before gesturing with a curt bow. “I’ll be heading out then. Thank you for the drink and take care on your way home as well.”

Jihoon hefts the strap of his guitar case over his shoulder before making his way to the door as you busy yourself with cleaning the last glass to put back on the shelf. His footfalls are calm against the polished wood and it’s another sound you appreciate with the rainstorm buzzing faintly in the background. 

However, before he can reach for the knob, the door opens all the way—revealing a cloaked figure holding a stack of newspapers above his head. A makeshift umbrella, probably, but it did little to salvage him from the onslaught outside. Jihoon immediately recognizes him despite his disheveled state and lets out a long-winded sigh.

“Hey,” he calls the newcomer’s attention. “The pub’s already closed.”

The man ignores him, his damp cloak fluttering with his movements as he strides towards the bar. Jihoon sighs again, muttering something about bratty royals just doing whatever the hell they want before stepping out into the rain. 

You only realize that you’ve got new company when Jihoon pulls the door shut behind him—breath hitching at the sight of a very familiar face as he pulls off his cloak and tosses it on top of the counter along with the newspapers in his grasp.

“Your Highness?” you greet him half-heartedly. “What brings you here?”

It’s not a complete secret that Prince Joshua drops by for the pub every now and again. While not every one of your regulars is aware of his frequent visits, most of the staff have been informed of his tendencies to spend his time here. They’ve been sworn to secrecy, of course. 

It’s been over two months since Joshua last showed his face around these parts, however—busy with all the necessary preparations for his wedding, you bet. But from the sullen look on his face, you have a feeling that whatever gossip Jihoon has gotten wind of might have some weight to it.

He doesn’t answer your previous question, so you switch up tactics with, “What are you having tonight?”

“Jihoon said it was already closing time,” he mumbles.

You hum in affirmation. “But you went ahead and made yourself at home despite knowing that anyway, right?” 

The corners of his mouth turn up slightly but the smile quickly vanishes. Your chest tightens at the sight of it.

“I guess you’re not wrong,” Joshua laughs quietly before carding his fingers through his rain-soaked hair. “Fix me up a good old Oak Walker, will you?”

You’re not sure if it’s for the best to serve him a glass of the pub’s finest aged whiskey, but a sympathetic part of you says there’s no harm in indulging him. 

Joshua nurses his drink across the bar in silence—the ever-present backdrop of rain ringing in both of your ears. His lack of anything to say is mildly off-putting because you’re used to him being all smiles and laughs as he shares the royal ventures that took place after his last visit. More so the royal ventures he had with his fiancée. 

To say that you’re itching to ask him about how things are going on with her is an understatement, but you’re no idiot who can’t read the room. 

He stays for about twenty minutes, so deep in thought that you’re convinced that he’s forgotten you were there with him at all. Apart from a few sighs of defeat, you don’t hear even the slightest peep out of the prince. Sure, he was never one to be excessively talkative during his visits, but even a stranger can tell that something’s wrong.

Gods. Just how bad is it?

Joshua gently lays down his glass on the counter once he finishes his whiskey—all those etiquette classes easily setting him apart from regulars who slam them down before heaving their obnoxious laughter. He slides his payment across the surface; an amount that comes with change worth more than the drink itself. But before you can tell him the same thing you told Jihoon earlier, he’s already sliding his cloak back on. 

“Thanks,” he whispers, adjusting the hood so it somewhat conceals his face. “I really needed that drink.” 

…Was it selfish of you to hope he’d say something else? Like he needed your company, for example? It probably is. 

Because who are you to have the prince needing your company for?

Joshua’s boots fall heavy against the wooden floor—a far cry from Jihoon’s easygoing strides. As your eyes stay glued on his retreating form, you bite the inside of your cheek. You want to call out to him, ask him what’s wrong, and let him know that you’re there to listen. Just like all the times he’s talked to you about everything he’s come to appreciate about the common realm. 

But your voice fails you—just like it did many times before.

It’s only when Joshua is long gone and you’re slinging your satchel over your shoulder that you notice that the Prince left something behind. That stack of newspapers he brought with him when he came in earlier. Most of the flimsy material has been soaked through, but the text was still legible enough to read. 

When your gaze catches on the title of the headline, however, you nearly drop it out of pure shock.

WHERE HAS THE RUNAWAY PRINCESS GONE?

On the first day of spring, the shock of a lifetime befalls the ears of every citizen of not only the capital, but the entire kingdom of Seraphia. The youngest Crown Prince, Joshua, invited scribes from all across the land into the great halls of the royal castle to finally address the previous week’s hot topic: the postponement of his wedding ceremony with future Princess-Consort Hyejin, who was dubbed as the kingdom’s sweetheart by the general public over the past year. 

The blossoming romance between the royal couple charmed thousands of Seraphians, which vastly contributed to the sizzling anticipation for their marriage. It was due to take place in the courtyard of the royal castle once the snow has thawed and the kingdom is able to welcome spring with open arms. Needless to say, it would’ve been the perfect setting for a perfect celebration!

However, it was announced by the Queen herself a fortnight ago that the ceremony had to be postponed for reasons that would be disclosed in the future—causing quite an uproar amongst the populace. Not a word of input was heard from both Prince Joshua and Hyejin themselves and any information regarding the topic was put on tight reins. Some speculated that there were merely a few inconveniences that had to be sorted out first before the royal couple could officially tie the knot; others assumed that one or either of them fell ill and were simply waiting for swift recovery.

But today, we learned that not all fairytales have happy endings. Prince Joshua officially announced the complete dissolution of his engagement to Hyejin as well as the retraction of all previous news of the matrimonial ceremony. 

If the postponement caused an uproar, the latest update on our favorite couple’s situation has ignited chaos of insurmountable levels. The scribes that were present in the impromptu press conference begged for more details about the matter, but Prince Joshua requested for the citizens to remain calm about the entire ordeal—saying it was a mutual decision that he and Hyejin had come to make together. He also pleaded for the public to give them the privacy they both direly needed in such a trying time with the reassurance that the couple simply agreed that they were not fit to be each other’s spouse, despite Hyejin being eleven months into her royal assimilation period.

Several conflicting opinions have since sprouted about the latest scoop on the previously renowned royal couple. Speculations of third parties came into light, especially since Hyejin has yet to make a public appearance to address all these issues herself. 

Has the Princess-Consort really run away? Find out more in next week’s issue of the Daily Tribune!

As you read over the last paragraph, you notice frost starting to gather at your fingertips—a manifestation of your emotions. 

You’re quick to shake your head and retract your magic before you end up freezing the entire stack of papers with your touch alone. Not without cursing the gods for giving you an elemental affinity that’s painfully in tune with your emotional constitution, of course.

You decide to throw the newspapers in the trash—figuring that Joshua must place little importance in them if he left them in the state they were in. He’ll come across dozens of copies in the plaza if he ever wants another one anyway.

When you get home that night, you immediately treat yourself to a nice, hot bath before heading straight to bed, not seeing any incentive in staying up overthinking the recent news. But no matter how many blankets you bury yourself under, no matter how much wood you toss into the hearth…

Your fingers remain startlingly cold. 

The first time Prince Joshua showed up in the bar, it was raining as well. In fact, it was storming.

Business was slow. None of the regulars wanted to hassle themselves by braving the storm just to get their daily fix of alcohol and the owner couldn’t even convince any of the usual singers to show up that night. 

So it’s just you and the owner’s children, Kazuha and Yuta.

“Do you think something interesting’s going to happen today?” Kazuha sighs, drumming her fingers across the counter with a bored look. “Father shouldn’t have opened the pub when I told him multiple times that the weather is going to be like this.”

Yuta snorts from the other side of the bar, passing small crackles of lightning between his hands before getting up to pour himself a drink. “You know the old man is going to grab every opportunity to turn in some profit. Even if only a single customer goes through those doors tonight, he’d consider it worth sending three employees into a storm.”

“If that’s the case, we should just sneak a few banknotes in today’s order tally and call it a day,” Kazuha huffs before turning to you. “You’re with me on this, right?”

Pursing your lips, you raise your hands up in a gesture of indignation. “Don’t come dragging me into your schemes, Zuha. I have no intention of getting prematurely fired.”

Kazuha groans and Yuta snorts before handing you a glass of bourbon. 

“The least the old man can do is treat us to a few drinks, whether or not he knows about it,” he snickers as you take the glass from his hand. “Cheers?”

“What, so she gets a drink but your little sister doesn’t?” Kazuha scowls. “I get that you’ve got no one else to use your cheap pick-up lines on tonight, but how could you flirt so shamelessly in front of me?”

You placate her with an apologetic smile. “You know Yuta will have an aneurysm if he doesn’t express interest in anyone from the female population that isn't family. I’m just keeping one of my boss’ kids from keeling over.”

“Harsh as ever,” Yuta sighs before you clink your glasses together. “No wonder you have ice magic.”

“Say that again and I’ll freeze your entire drink, lover boy.”

As you continue playfully bickering with the siblings, you start to consider Kazuha’s suggestion a bit more seriously. It’s nearly time to close up shop and not a single soul has gone through the front door and it doesn’t seem like the rain is going to let up any time soon. Which is all sorts of strange because it rarely ever rains in Seraphia in the middle of summer.

But that’s exactly how the youngest prince walked into your life—like a summer rainstorm. 

He’s soaked all over, tracking water all over the floorboards with a shiver to his posture. You don’t recognize who he is at first—all bundled up in his cloak—but when the newcomer pulls off his hood, you and the siblings end up gaping at him like fishes out of water.

Because what on earth is Prince Joshua doing in some dingy pub in the middle of the night when it’s raining buckets outside?

“Hello,” he says kindly, not a breath out of beat despite the fact that he’s dripping from head to toe. “One of the knights told me this place sells the best whiskey in the capital.”

Surprisingly, Kazuha is the first out of the three of you to snap out of your collective stupor—putting on her best smile before replying with, “You’ve heard right. Would you like a glass, Your Highness?”

The formal address seems to fluster him and you find it slightly amusing to see a perfectly put-together royal’s ears turning red. “Please, no need to call me that.”

“I’m pretty sure we’ll be marching at the gallows if we called you by your first name, Your Highness,” Yuta interjects, grabbing a glass before heading over to the whiskey kegs. “You’re just in time, actually. We were just about to close early.”

“I figured,” Joshua chuckles before hanging his damp cloak on the rack by the entrance. “I didn’t think this place would be open, actually. Every other pub I’ve passed was closed for the night.”

Kazuha rolls her eyes. “You have the owner to thank for that.”

The siblings easily accommodate the prince himself as if he was just another customer they served on any other night. You suppose it comes from practically growing up in this place when their father still manned the bar. But still, how could they act so normally around someone as important as Joshua?

Then again…

They don’t know him the way you do.

“Hey,” Kazuha whispers when you flutter off to the side, letting Yuta entertain tonight’s esteemed guest with his lightning magic. “You’re acting a little weird. I get he’s royalty and everything, but this isn’t the first time we’ve had to cater to nobles. Father’s pub is well known for a reason.”

You take a deep breath as your eyes momentarily flicker to the prince who’s awed by Yuta’s little display. For someone who was just out in the rain, he still looked unfairly breathtaking. His damp hair is somewhat slicked back, tiny droplets dripping down every now and again. And even if his clothes—made from the finest of textiles, no doubt—haven’t been spared by the rain, his poise makes it seem as if he didn’t just rush out of a storm. 

You’ve spotted Prince Joshua whenever there are festivals in the city every now and again. He’s a benevolent royal that likes spending time with commoners—not one to mind the class divide like other nobles. But you’ve never seen him this close in a while.

The sight of Joshua now reminds you of several years before. 

Memories of a rushing river and a runaway pup. Of a young prince and flowers given to the brave. They all come back to you like these events happened yesterday and not more than a decade ago. 

But with all those fond memories also comes a firm reminder.

You and him are on opposite ends. You...should keep that in mind.

“Hello? You’re spacing out on me again.”

Finally, you snap out of it and catch Kazuha staring at you with a look of concern. Your coworker even flattens a palm across your forehead to feel for your temperature. “Are you sure you’re okay? Not running a fever or anything? You can go home early if you need to. Yuta and I can take care of him just fine.”

You’re about to insist that you’re fine, but before you can get a word out, you hear Yuta calling your name from the other side—a no good smirk on his face as he gestures for you to come over.

“This is our number one bartender and resident Ice Queen,” he introduces and you scowl at him immediately. “She might concoct the best drinks in the entire district, but she’s got an ice cold heart! Don’t try to flirt with her or she’ll turn your drink into a block of ice.”

“Weirdo. I’m only like that to you,” you hiss.

Yuta giggles and you want nothing more than to smack him. “Oh? So does that mean I’m special?”

“No. That means you’re the only one irritating enough to get a rise out of her,” Kazuha backs you up with a sigh before turning to Joshua. “Sorry about these two. They can’t sit in the same room for five minutes without a fight breaking out.” 

Thanks to both siblings, your earlier hesitation to let the prince even perceive you dissipates in a flash. You cast Yuta an annoyed stare before finishing the rest of the bourbon he’d poured for you earlier. “Well, no fights would be happening if Yuta stopped basing his entire personality off of being a playboy.”

“Gods, it’s not that deep, Ice Queen. Chill out.”

“I’m going to put arsenic in your next drink. Mark my words.”

While you and the eldest son of the owner are neck and neck, you hear Joshua stifle a laugh in his seat. You and Yuta turn to look at him abruptly, wondering what’s so funny.

“Sorry, I just found it amusing how easily such threats come from either of you,” he muses, swirling his glass so that the ice crinkles inside. “If anyone said that to me in the royal castle, even in a jest, they’d be thrown in the dungeons immediately.”

“And that’s why we’re going to be civil whenever His Highness is around, aren’t we?” Kazuha flashes the two of you a thin smile. Despite being the youngest out of your trio, she’s definitely the most level-headed.

“Of course,” Yuta responds coolly. “Prince Joshua doesn’t have to worry about Ice Queen here poisoning his drinks. She was starstruck the moment he set foot inside—ow!”

Kazuha clicks her tongue as Yuta rubs the spot on his head where his little sister just clocked him. “What did I just say about being civil?”

Sparing the siblings another laugh, Joshua then turns his attention to you. “It’s nice to meet you as well. Pray tell, why is he calling you Ice Queen? You seem like a warm enough person to me.”

You don’t know if it’s the unusually chilly air or his comment that makes the blood rush to your cheeks, but either way, you attempt to mask it by coughing into your hand before giving him an answer. 

“Um, that’s just Yuta being Yuta.”

“No, she practices ice magic,” the little bastard interjects. “Hate how she’s so good at using it too ‘cause whenever she says she’ll freeze my drinks, half the time, it isn’t a bluff.”

Kazuha stares at him flatly. “Only because you deserve it.”

“See, now she’s turned my own blood against me!” Yuta whines. 

The prince chuckles to himself again, taking another sip. “So all three of you are magic users as well?”

Yuta nods. “Mhmm. I’ve got lightning magic, Ice Queen’s got ice magic, and Kazuha’s got wind magic. Little sis can actually tell when there’s a storm coming, too.” 

“Oh? So you anticipated that the weather would be like this?” 

The siblings both groan in unison—clearly recalling how their father insisted for them to open the pub despite the atrocious weather. 

Joshua is immediately immersed with Kazuha explaining the technicalities of her magic and the prince gives his own input on how being able to predict the weather would benefit not just the royal capital, but the entire kingdom of Seraphia.

It’s so…like him to apply the things he learns to such an altruistic cause.

“I’m acquainted with a few wind elementals, but none of them have tried anticipating the shift in the weather like you do,” the prince comments, quite impressed, before turning to Yuta. “I suppose you have a similar ability as well?”

Your coworker shakes his head vehemently. “I can only feel a thunderstorm when it’s already here. If you want someone who can pick up even the slightest changes in the weather, Zuha’s your girl.”

Despite the rare praise from her brother, Kazuha merely scoffs. “It’s all useless if Father will tell us to open up shop in the middle of a storm anyway.” 

“I suppose so,” Joshua agrees with a sigh. “How about you? What do you use your magic for?”

It takes you a moment to realize that he was talking to you. “Pardon?”

The grin that spreads on his face is bright enough to light up a storm-ridden evening. “Your magic. I’m sure you don’t just use it to freeze Yuta’s drinks, now do you?”

Yuta snorts into his drink while Kazuha elbows him in the stomach. You keep yourself from letting out a laugh of your own. You can trust Kazuha to have your back all the time.

“Well, aside from that and enchanting the ice in our customers’ drinks so they won’t melt too quickly, I…don’t use my magic that much,” you admit, scratching the back of your head out of mild embarrassment. “Ice magic isn’t as versatile as water magic. It doesn’t have a lot of everyday uses. Plus, I could accidentally kill someone if I don’t keep my emotions in check.”

For the first time tonight, Joshua’s pearly white smile falls. “What do you mean?”

When you feel the skin of your fingertips prickling with a chilly sensation, you immediately ball your fists at your side—not wanting to give the prince a firsthand demonstration of your…magical affliction just yet.

“Elemental magic is easily influenced by the user’s emotions,” you murmur, purposely avoiding Joshua’s scrutinizing gaze. “But…mine has always been a little on the unstable side. I don’t use it a lot because if idiots like Yuta rile me up too badly, I might end up launching an icicle through his chest without thinking.”

“Hey!” The pub’s resident player complains. “That example is a little too scary. Couldn’t you have gone with ‘I might give him frostbite all over’ first?”

Kazuha glances at him bizarrely. “Isn’t that worse?”

Joshua hums contemplatively, taking another swig of whiskey. “Hmm. We’re on the same boat then. I don’t use my magic very often either.”

“You don’t?” you ask incredulously. 

“Yes. The royal family as a whole doesn’t rely on magic much. We have the royal mages to take care of anything involving the practice altogether,” he explains, pouting a little when he realizes his glass is empty. You move to pour him another round, but the prince shakes his head. “Instead of attending the Academy like most children our age did, my brother and I were thrust into the world of diplomatic relations at the ripe ages of twelve and fourteen. After all, you don’t need magic when you’re locked in a battle of wits in the royal court.”

Yuta and Kazuha nod in understanding, but the expression on your face is the exact opposite.

“But…your magic is so pretty,” you muse absentmindedly. “Why shouldn’t you use it? Especially when there’s lots of people who look up to you?”

You can feel Kazuha shooting you that reprimanding stare she constantly gives to her brother, but you can’t help it. Not when you’ve witnessed the prince’s magic firsthand—even if it was a long time ago. 

“They don’t look up to me because of my magic, sadly,” Joshua chuckles, seeing no offense in your question. “But…I find it more amusing that you say that as if you’ve seen my magic. It’s been years since I last used it, much less shown it to another person.”

Three pairs of eyes flicker to your form expectantly and you can feel your heart drop to the pit of your stomach. Fuck. 

“U-Uh, I just remember seeing it during your coronation ceremony,” you stammer. “When you conjured an entire bouquet out of thin air to give to the Queen as thanks.” 

You’re not exactly lying since you did see the youngest son of the royal family showcase his magic once he was hailed as the second Crown Prince. It was a joyous occasion for the royal capital—as Joshua held promise where his older brother Jeonghan did not. 

“I see. You have an amazing memory then,” Joshua commends with a smile that makes your heart flutter traitorously. “I didn’t think anyone would remember that.”

You have half the mind to tell him that you remember a lot more about him than just that. But the same words echo inside your head—over and over like a dreadful reminder of the striking reality you were born in. 

You and him are on opposite ends. 

You’re not certain if you should feel happy or not about the growing frequency of Prince Joshua’s visits.

He doesn’t really do much in the pub. For someone who grew up being the center of attention, Joshua actually does a good job at blending in the crowd unnoticed. The prince is merely an observer—quietly sipping his drinks as your patrons let chaos loose all around him. 

You and the siblings manage to keep his undercover visits discreet for about a week at most until the pub’s regular performer, Seokmin, finally notices the cloaked figure that always takes a seat at the bar whenever he drops by. 

“So the fabled Prince Joshua can actually drink cheap liquor,” the singer chuckles once the last of the regular patrons have left, clinking glasses with Joshua as if he was just another one of his drinking buddies. “Here I thought royals only had fine wines imported aaaaall the way from the vineyards of the next kingdom over.”

That earns him a smack upside the head by his fellow musician, Jihoon. “Keep talking loosely like that and you might just get thrown into the dungeons.”

“And our drinks are far from cheap,” Yuta adds with an eyeroll.

As usual, Joshua dismisses all their concerns with an easy laugh, insisting that there’s no need for anyone to be afraid of being imprisoned for being casual with him.

“When I’m here, I want you all to think of me just like everyone else,” he says with a smile so genuine, not a single staff member could even hope to refuse him.

Since he’s quite exceptional at keeping a low profile, it was mutually decided by everyone to just let the prince do as he pleases—soaking in all the noise and bonding over conversation with you and the other staff members after hours. It’s an unlikely interaction and an even unlikelier friendship, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Kazuha even joked that there’s no harm in seeing a pretty face every now and again. While you completely agreed, she doesn’t have to know that. Not at all.

He sticks around through the scorching hot summer and even the bleakest of winter. It’s gotten to the point that none of you are baffled by his constant presence anymore. By the time spring is upon Seraphia, Joshua still lingers by the sidelines.

Then comes the day the royal family announced that they were looking for wind elementals interested in becoming the kingdom’s first Stormwatchers. Yuta’s first reaction upon hearing the news was to put his little sister up for the job, but since Kazuha is yet to graduate from the Academy, she immediately shot down his encouragement. 

Along with that is the city-wide notice of an upcoming music festival. Similar celebrations aren’t rare in Seraphia, but one dedicated solely to singing and dancing in the streets of the capital is the first of its kind. Seokmin and Jihoon’s circle of musicians practically implodes with glee at the news—your two regular performers immediately asking for a few nights off in order to make the necessary preparations for the festival.

With so many things sprouting in everyone’s agendas, it’s no surprise that you don’t see Joshua for a while either. You have an inkling that all these new updates from the royal family have something to do with the things the prince has learned during his time hanging out in the pub. 

You’re not sure whether that’s a good thing or not, but the mere thought has you sighing dreamily like a schoolgirl with a crush.

“Oh, it’s been a while.”

Stopping by the Jeon Flower Emporium isn’t something you get to do a lot given the nature of your job and the biorhythm it forces you to operate on. The owner, Wonwoo, is one of your long-time friends. He typically opens up shop at the crack of dawn and packs everything away an hour before dusk. When you do get to drop by, it’s typically on your days off—much like today.

“Good morning, Wonwoo.” You smile at him before letting your eyes drift onto the bouquet he’s putting together by the counter. “How has business been faring?”

Wonwoo cracks you a grin that would make any maiden swoon as he ties the flowers together with expert hands. “A bit slow, if I’m being honest. But I am hopeful for more customers now that the royal family announced a music festival coming up. Those kinds of things bring in more tourists to the capital than you’d think.”

The two of you exchange quiet laughs before Wonwoo tells you about a rather complicated order he received a few days ago. 

“An entire plant box full of flowers,” he chuckles. “I haven’t done any orders like that before, but this client is sort of a big deal, so I couldn’t really refuse.”

“I’m sure you won’t disappoint,” you encourage him. “My mother doesn’t consider you her favorite florist for nothing, you know.” 

Wonwoo shakes his head. “My mother is Auntie's favorite florist. Don’t go mixing things up just to flatter me. Oh, by the way…”

“Hm? What is it?”

Your friend leaves the bouquet he’s been putting together for a moment before walking off to one of the many shelves inside his shop. Wonwoo hums a song that you could’ve sworn you’d heard Seokmin sing a few nights ago before his eyes light up once he finds what he’s looking for.

“I received a shipment of these from Ancarra yesterday and I immediately thought of you,” he says, gesturing for you to come closer.

Curiously, you pad over to Wonwoo’s side, taking a look at what he wanted to show you. The moment your eyes catch on a beautiful patch of daisies, however, you feel your mouth go dry.

“I still remember the time Auntie asked my mother to preserve the little daisy you found back then,” Wonwoo murmurs all while caressing the flowers with his gloved hand before shifting his spectacled gaze towards you. “Do you still have it?”

If Wonwoo sees the way you hesitate to answer his question, he doesn’t show it. “I do. It’s in my parents’ house though. I feel like if I took it with me to my place, it would die in three business days despite the preservation magic.”

“Nonsense,” Wonwoo laughs. “You’re always so hard on yourself. Just because you have ice magic, doesn’t mean that every plant you touch will freeze up and die.”

“You don’t know that.” 

Your friend rolls his eyes. “I do. Now, if you’ll excuse me for a second because—”

“Oh. Fancy seeing you here.”

You nearly jump out of your own skin when you hear that familiar voice calling out from behind you. Unlike yourself, Wonwoo isn’t even fazed by the sudden arrival of one Prince Joshua inside his shop. In fact, he even beams at the unexpected(?) visitor. Does everyone think meeting royalty like this isn’t a big deal anymore? 

“H-Hello, Your Highness,” you stammer, trying not to get too distracted by the way he carries himself so gallantly. It’s the first time you’ve seen him out of his usual disguises whenever he stops by the pub. You would’ve appreciated a heads up from the gods so you can at least mentally prepare yourself for this.

“I often stop by here to admire Wonwoo’s flowers since there aren’t a lot of them in the castle.” Joshua smiles—that pearly white smile that could easily bring you to your knees—before turning to face Wonwoo. “Well…that and I have a pending order from our resident florist here.”

So he’s the one who booked Wonwoo for that order he was talking about earlier. 

“I see…” You muse, forcibly taming your heartbeat into normalcy. “But, can’t you just grow them yourself? Or have someone else grow them for you? I’m certain your servants would be more than happy to do it for you.”

You half-expect Joshua to downplay your words like he usually would whenever someone in the pub brought up something concerning the castle. He’s a man who likes deflecting things like that easily, never one to talk about complicated topics. 

But for some reason, Joshua’s smile falls just a little before he lets out an airy laugh.

“Haha, I wish I could.”

Wonwoo eventually excuses himself because he still has an order to put together before his client comes to pick the flowers up. You want to tell Wonwoo not to leave you alone with Joshua because you might just melt into a puddle right there on the floor of his shop, but alas, your friend sees no problem in doing just that.

You fear that it would be too awkward to bear. This is the first time you’ve been around the prince without anyone else pitching into the conversation. Would he think you’re not worth talking to? Would he think you were strange for not being casual with him like everyone else seems to be? 

The flurry of questions that surge inside your head sort of angers you because…you never overthink your interactions with other people to this extent. You’re a bartender, for gods’ sake. It’s your job to talk to people. 

“So how do you and Wonwoo know each other?” 

You perk up at the prince’s question. It’s not that you didn’t expect him to initiate—because of course he would—but you’re mildly thrown off guard by the inquiry.

“Our mothers were best friends,” you explain, tucking your clammy hands behind your back.

Joshua raises an eyebrow. “Were?” 

“Oh, uh, Wonwoo’s mother passed away a few years ago.” Glancing over his shoulder, you watch Wonwoo quietly work on the bouquet with an easygoing look on his face, making sure your voice won’t reach him. “She used to own this shop, but Wonwoo has been manning it ever since her passing. He even quit the Academy just so he can keep the business afloat.” 

From the looks of it, this seems like news to Joshua. “I’m— I’m sorry. The question was somewhat out of turn. Forgive me.”

You shake your head. “There’s absolutely no need to apologize, Your Highness. Wonwoo is perfectly happy with continuing his mother’s legacy like this. I’m sure you’ve seen it for yourself.”

“Hmm… He is very passionate about his work,” Joshua notes with a small smile. “I wouldn’t have commissioned him to arrange my order if that wasn’t the case.”

“Speaking of…” Your voice trails off, recalling the details that Wonwoo imparted earlier about an entire plant box full of flowers. “If I may ask, what’s the occasion? Are you perhaps ordering the flowers for the music festival?”

Joshua blinks in nonplus, as if taken aback by your inquiry as well. Still, his posture doesn’t falter and he shakes his head with a chuckle—a tinge of red dusting both his cheeks and the tips of his ears. 

“No. It’s for someone I’ve had my eyes on for a while now,” he admits and you feel your heart sink at the shy manner he says it.

Someone he’s had his eyes on…

It shouldn’t surprise you that someone like Prince Joshua could arrange such grand gestures for the person who makes his heart race. But the fact that he has a person like that makes your stomach twist uncomfortably. 

You’re happy for him. A person who constantly looks after the people as often and as earnestly as Joshua does deserves a person he can lean on from time to time, too. But you can’t deny the ugly feeling that coils in your chest at the knowledge no matter how badly you want to.

Fortunately, Joshua is quick to change the topic before you can force yourself to voice out your well wishes for his pursuit of a lover. 

“Now that you mentioned the music festival though, I’m glad the news has reached you,” he laughs softly. “It took me a while to convince the old crones in the royal court to put the show underway. The gods know how stubborn they can be when it comes to making what they think are unnecessary expenses. But I thought it would be a good avenue to bring together not just the nobles and commoners of the capital, but also the kingdom’s musicians.” 

You don’t know how to react first—be endeared at the thought that he thinks so fondly of his constituents or laugh at the fact that the epitome of princeliness himself called the elders of the royal court ‘old crones’. In the end, you decide on neither and just appreciate the fact that he’s comfortable enough to tell you all of this.

“You got that right,” you tell him. “Yuta, Kazuha, and I were getting sick of the old traditional festivals. I’m pretty sure I can say the same for the rest of the people in the city, so it’s good that you decided to spice things up a little. What’s more is that you’re inviting people outside the capital for the festivities.”

Joshua nods as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. “Well, everyone within the borders of Seraphia is our people. It wouldn’t be fair for anyone to confine the celebrations here.”

Gods. How were you supposed to not fall for someone like him?

“That said, may I do the honors of inviting you and the others back at the pub?” He offers up another handsome smile. “Seokmin and Jihoon already signed up as performers along with a couple of other musicians all across the kingdom. I figured that all of you would appreciate getting front row seats to the show.”

Pushing away any and all unsavory thoughts about the prince and his would-be muse, you muster up a smile that, admittedly, doesn’t really reach your eyes.

“Well, if it’s a personal invite from the prince himself, we’d be heathens not to accept.”

You part ways with Joshua and Wonwoo a few moments later, saying that you still have some errands to run in the market. Definitely not because it stings to stare at someone who you never had a chance to have for even a second longer. 

But before you’re even ten steps away from the front door of the Jeon Flower Emporium, someone forcibly yanks on your arm—making you whirl around with equal parts confusion and surprise. When you realize it’s Joshua, you’re even more flabbergasted than you already are.

He pants as if he just sprinted out of the shop just to catch you—his princely demeanor making way for something bordering on desperate, but not really. Though you can’t pay his constitution that much mind because you’re hyper focused on the way his warm fingers enclose your wrist. 

“I-Is anything the matter, Your Highness?”

Joshua startles at the question as if he was in a trance himself. He takes a second to gather his thoughts before straightening out—clearing his throat awkwardly with his fist before offering you something in his other hand.

A daisy.

“I swear I’m going to pay for that when I go back to the shop,” he clarifies with a sheepish look.

With hesitance shining on your face, you accept his gift, trying not to collapse in a heap of tears in the middle of town. Joshua’s eyes seem to light up when you take it from his hand and you will your magic not to ruin the moment—to let you have something nice for once.

“Thank you,” you murmur, unable to help the way your face reddens. “But…why?”

“Why?”

“Why’d you give this to me?”

The pleased look on Joshua’s face morphs into confusion and then…embarrassment. 

“I…” His voice trails off as if he’s struggling to find the words. “I just thought even the Ice Queen deserves to receive flowers.”

If it was Yuta who said those words to your face, you would’ve blasted him with a hit from your ice magic. But this isn’t Yuta, it’s Joshua.

The prince you’ve been in love with since you were ten years old.

You don’t know the rhyme or reason behind his choice to pluck one of Wonwoo’s freshly imported daisies off the shelves; to run after you—a complete nobody—out of the shop before you can go any farther. But you bring the dainty little flower to your chest, cradling it carefully in your hands like you’re afraid it will vanish in an instant.

Instead of going to the market like you initially planned, you make a detour to your childhood home near the outskirts of the capital. You catch your father chopping wood in the front yard while your mother prepares lunch inside the house. Needless to say, your parents are more than happy to see you back home.

After having a quick meal with them, your father goes back to making enough lumber for the neighborhood while you ask your mother, “Can I see the flowers again?”

A puzzled look graces her face, but she nods anyway—leading you to the back where she grew flowers the same way she raised you.

“Have you seen Wonwoo lately, dear?” she wonders as she lets you marvel at the garden that continues to grow every time you visit. “He always asks about the little daisy his mother enchanted back then. Saying he’s concerned her preservation magic might fade away, but he keeps forgetting she used to be one of the best plant mages in the entire kingdom. That boy, seriously…”

As your mother drones on and on about Wonwoo’s concerns, your heart warms at the sight of a small pedestal that your mother bought to place the flower in question. 

It’s a little daisy just like the one Joshua handed to you earlier today. But what makes this one different is that, not only is it enchanted with the preservation magic of Wonwoo’s late mother, but it was given to you once upon a time by the same prince that still makes your heart flutter to this day.

Ten year-old Prince Joshua fashioned it with his own hands, with his own magic before giving it to you as a gift. 

For being braver than anyone I’ve ever seen with my own two eyes.

You place the brand new daisy right next to it in the pot—despite knowing that it probably won’t take root anymore and that the preservation magic won’t extend to it as well. Your mother watches your every move with a confused look on her face, but asks no questions.

You hoped she wouldn’t. Especially since you still live by the things she told you when you were still younger.

You and him are on opposite ends. You must keep that in mind.

“Anything interesting going on at work?” 

That’s the first thing she asks when you head back to the living room to gather the rest of your things. You humor her with a noncommittal hum. 

“Not really. Why?”

She pouts. “Really? No suitors at all?” You groan, but your mother just continues. “Wonwoo could be a good choice, dear. He’s always such a sweetheart. Maybe even that singer you keep telling me about…Seokmin? Oh, but aren’t you getting along well with your employer’s son, too? What’s his name? Yuta?”

“Mother,” you plead—nearly balking at the idea of being romantically involved with any of the men she just mentioned. (Okay, maybe Wonwoo isn’t too bad of a choice, but that’s not the point here.)

She ends up giggling like a socialite who just heard the juiciest gossip from her friends, but in the end your mother resorts to just smoothing her hand comfortingly across your back.

“I know, I know. It’s just that you’re at marriageable age now, dear. You should start thinking about these things sooner rather than later.”

Sooner rather than later, huh…

Even as you make the trip back to the city to run the errands you’ve been putting off, your mother’s words echo inside your head over and over.

In hindsight, you could’ve fallen for the childhood friend who owns a flower shop, the singer who takes the stage of the bar every other day. Hell, even the owner’s flirtatious son could’ve been a better choice. 

But you can’t really help it if your heart longs for a prince who’s in love with somebody else.

It doesn’t take long before Prince Joshua’s engagement is announced.

The kingdom is in high spirits—talk of the youngest prince finally tying the knot like he deserves fills every nook and cranny of the capital for days to come. He’s going to be wed to a commoner from the far east by spring next year and when Kazuha read the headline about it out loud one night at the pub, you try your best to act as supportive as you wished you were.

A commoner. He’s going to be marrying a commoner—not some socialite from high society, not a royal like himself, but a commoner. 

Someone like you, but at the same time isn’t because you doubt you’d be able to charm someone like Joshua in the next life either. It’s a bitter thought that simmers in the back of your head, but you’re smart enough not to dwell on it too much.

As expected, Joshua’s visits start to grow few and far in-between after that. Apart from his engagement with a woman named Hyejin, he’s tasked to venture off to the neighboring kingdom of Ancarra for the purpose of strengthening diplomatic relations. The gossip mongers in the pub whisper about how his older brother Jeonghan is accompanying him as well since his rumored fiancée is of Ancarran royalty but you can hardly vouch for the credibility of your alcoholic regulars.

That said, it’s become somewhat…lonelier in the pub. 

A few months after Joshua’s engagement, Kazuha was required by the Academy to venture far north to train under a wind mage rumored to be hundreds of years old. But you can’t really trust anything that Yuta says, so you simply sent her off with a bottle of aged wine to enjoy during her stay in case she misses you too much.  

Then there’s Yuta, your arch-nemesis. The bastard actually went ahead and got himself a day job at the local swordsmith’s shop. Though the need for weaponry has decreased over the years since there are no longer any wars to fight, he seemed very optimistic about his new occupation, so you didn’t say a word—not even in playful spite—when he broke the news. To his credit, he promised to hire additional staff to compensate for the loss in manpower, and that he’d still drop by the pub whenever he isn’t too exhausted. 

“So that you won’t get too lonely without us,” Yuta snickered before you froze his champagne before he could even take a sip. 

With both Prince Joshua and the siblings preoccupied with their own lives, that leaves you with less company than you’re used to. The new hires that Yuta promised offered more help than he ever did in the pub, but Shotaro and Sungchan are still too nervous to speak to you casually, much less squander time with you after hours. They’re out of the doors once they’ve helped clean up for closing time—leaving you with only Jihoon and Seokmin to hang out with in the rare chance that they still have energy after a long night of performing.

Every now and again, you catch a whiff of gossip in the wind—just some insignificant updates about Joshua. Both for his engagement and the constant back-and-forth trips he makes between Seraphia and Ancarra. 

Rumor has it that the royal family is hosting a ball after a while to mark Hyejin’s sixth month into her royal assimilation. It would be her first public appearance as Joshua’s fiancée, so it would make sense that more than half the citizens in the capital are highly anticipating it. 

The news doesn’t bother you as much as the engagement did. By now, your attraction to the prince is water under the bridge. Who cares if you were close enough to befriend him at one point? To let him become someone even more, if you’re pushing your delusions into the light? You’re content with having him as a friend and those nights you spent with your rowdy bunch in the pub are things you’d definitely spend years cherishing from the bottom of your heart.

In fact, you actually started to consider your mother’s advice recently. Though you’re nowhere near old, you’re not getting any younger either. Maybe you should start being more proactive with looking for a lover to settle down with in the future.

The first candidate is Wonwoo. 

He’s handsome enough that even noble socialites would ogle him by the window of his shop—going as far as purchasing bouquets just for a chance to speak with him. Plus, you practically grew up with him. If you were to pursue the man, you’d be past the awkward phase of getting to know each other. 

But you also remember Wonwoo bringing up that he isn’t really looking for anything romantic. He mentioned wanting to focus on the shop and provide for his father and younger brother at home. This happened before you started considering him as a prospect of your future affections, so that definitely saved you the time and effort and sheer trepidation that comes with switching things up with your childhood friend. Besides, you never really saw him that way.

The next is Seokmin. 

You’re not really sure why your mother even brought his name up when listing your potential lovers. Sure, you and him would dance around the pub after hours once both of you have had a drink too many, but things between you and the veteran singer never really bordered on anything more than platonic. Plus, Seokmin has a habit of sleeping with different women every week. It’s not that you have anything against that, but it just goes to show that he’s definitely not ready to settle down either.

Last is…Yuta.

Out of all the men your mother considered having as a son-in-law, he was definitely the last one you’d choose. Not only does he push all of your buttons and piss you off for the hell of it, but he’s even worse than Seokmin when it comes to his playboy tendencies. 

What makes it worse is that he’s so discreet about it, too! Most of the pub’s patrons simply know Yuta as the owner’s cool son with equally cool lightning magic. Despite how he looks, surely he wouldn’t be the type to break a poor maiden’s heart after one passionate night with them, right?

The answer to that is: no. 

You and Kauzha have dealt with dozens of ladies acting as if Yuta scorned them because the bastard just left without a word in the morning after a night of debauchery. Seokmin at least has the decency to say goodbye to his paramours and sets clear boundaries. There’s absolutely none of that with Yuta.

Which means you’re definitely smart enough to not get involved with someone like him. You’ve already set Prince Joshua as the standard. Surely, you wouldn’t find yourself in a situation where you have to pick the bar off the floor, right? For a man who you’d rather throw into a pool full of eels than say a polite good evening to, no less.

The answer to that is…

Also no.

In your defense, you were drunk. And lonely. And you never really denied the fact that, for all his irritating glory, Yuta is still objectively attractive. 

Besides, it’s not like the two of you went all the way. You merely confided your lack of a love life to him one random Saturday evening since Kazuha was already away for training. You wouldn’t dare admit it to his face, but Yuta was actually good at holding a decent conversation once the both of you got your heads out of your asses. 

You told him about Joshua, about your mother’s advice, and about how you feel like you’re going to die all alone in the world. He snickered, saying you’re overreacting again, but he doesn’t make any snide quips about the way you felt. 

Instead he propositioned you with, “How about this: let me kiss you. If you don’t feel anything—not even a single spark—then you might as well cross me out of your list of potential lovers.”

You remember staring at him incredulously before slurring, “But you can always just shock me with your magic, asshole. Don’t try to cheat your way into my heart.”

“You really think I’d cheat over something like this?” 

He sounded so serious when he asked, you didn’t have the heart to bite back with a snarky reply. Instead, you let your eyes drift to his grimacing lips. 

Yuta isn’t Joshua—he’ll never be.

But you’ll never be with the prince either, so you took the leap of faith, fisted the front of Yuta’s shirt, and kissed him.

Part of you is convinced that night changed the way things were between the two of you, despite his insistence that it’s alright, Ice Queen. I’m just not your type, and that’s not a big deal at all. Maybe it was what made him get a day job so he’d have an excuse to see you less—to talk to you less.

But you never really liked making things about you so you never really said anything when you watched Yuta walk out of the pub that night—with a slump to his shoulders that you can’t quite forget about. 

Thankfully, things seem to have reverted back to normal when he visits tonight, giving Sungchan and Shotaro a run for their money with how many mugs of beer he’s ordering for the friend he brought with him.

“That’s it, stuff this guy full before he avoids me for an entire year again,” Yuta barks out a grating laugh as he slings an arm around his friend, a fire elemental named Chan. “This bastard went all the way to the southern cities to train just like Kazuha’s doing right now and he didn’t even bother telling me!”

You’ve met Chan a few times in the past. He and Yuta are drinking buddies, but you’ve stopped seeing him around the time Joshua started hanging out here. Even if you barely knew the guy, it’s nice seeing another familiar face.

“I’m not going anywhere anytime soon, calm down,” he laughs before downing another mug and wiping the moisture off his lips. “Although I did come here with an ulterior motive.”

Yuta hums. “Came here to chase skirts or something? Sorry to say but half the women in this place are wrapped around Seokminnie’s finger. You can’t even seduce ‘em if you tried.”

Chan snorts before punching Yuta’s chest playfully and for a moment, your eyes catch on something around his pinky. A ring? No… It looks like a small blue flower tied around the base. 

“Don’t lump me in with you,” Chan complains, snapping you out of your momentary fixation. “I meant to ask Kazuha to be my plus one for this ball that our town’s royal mage is telling me to attend. But then you said your sister is all the way up north.” 

“Zuha’s way too young for you,” Yuta points out with a huff before gesturing to you. “How about Ice Queen over here? She could probably use the time to unwind and meet more people.”

You bring down his drink in front of him with a glare. “Don’t just go volunteering other people without their consent, douchebag.”

Yuta snickers before taking his first sip, and though you refuse to let it show, you’re somewhat glad that he’s back to grating on your nerves as usual. “Okay, fine. I’ll let Chan do all the asking then.”

You’re convinced that Chan wouldn’t really jump the gun right away and ask you just like Yuta suggested. After all, even if you do have mutual friends, you barely know each other. It would be wise to invite someone he’s more acquainted with for an important function like a ball.

But he continues to surprise you by bringing his hands together and bowing his head—pleading almost desperately. “Please be my plus one! I don’t know who else to ask and I’ve only got tonight left to find someone.”

“Tonight?” you echo disbelievingly.

Chan lifts his head to nod sullenly. “The ball I was asked to attend is the one that’s going to be held at the royal castle tomorrow. You know, for the first public appearance of Prince Joshua’s fiancée?”

Silence hangs between the three of you, eclipsing the rowdy background noise from the other patrons. You don’t dare look in Yuta’s direction—afraid that he realized how attending an event where Joshua would be present would affect you. 

Your first instinct is to decline. After all, you’ve done so well for the past few months. Joshua is but a dream that you can’t attain, and it’s growing easier to accept that with each day you don’t see him. He’s better off on his designated pedestal in the royal castle—dazzling, but completely far out of reach. You’re afraid that seeing him again would make everything you worked so hard for crumble to dust in a second.

But another part of you—the more foolish one, unfortunately—longs to see him again. His kind smile. His gallant posture. Everything.

So of course it’s a no-brainer when you say:

“Yes. I’d love to come with you.”

Okay, maybe agreeing to be Chan’s plus one is more of a hassle than it’s worth.

First of all, you had a dress to worry about. Where the hell can you get a dress that’s worthy of being worn to an important royal celebration at such short notice? It’s not like you had the extra cash to spare for something like this either. 

The next is the dawning realization that you’re going to be surrounded by nobles for the entire night. While Chan reassured that he himself is a commoner too, and that other commoners were also invited here and there, it doesn’t change the fact that you don’t have enough exposure to high society to know how to act.

“Yuta’s told me a lot about you already, and I know for a fact that you’ll do just fine,” your partner reassures with a smile. “Just…don’t accidentally freeze anyone or their drinks and you’ll be alright.”

…The revelation that Yuta talks about you to Chan aside, his words do prove to be somewhat reassuring. He also promised to pay for your dress, makeup and overall styling at his superior’s expense (“Are you sure he even knows you’re spending his money?” “Relax, I’ve got it all under control.”) All you had to do was show up tomorrow at the inn he’s renting a room a few hours before the party starts.

However, these pre-celebration anxieties pale in comparison to the nerve-wracking jitters that intermittently seize you in the ball itself.

You’ve never been to the castle before—much less, the massive ballroom inside. Seraphia is a kingdom with centuries’ worth of history written into the land and part of that history is the countless celebrations held by the royals of old. You can’t help but feel jarringly out of place somewhere like this. In a room full of lavishly dressed guests—majority of which are nobles—you’re pathetically inferior.

It’s kind of comforting to know that Chan might just be feeling the same way.

“Gods, this place is making me so nervous,” he admits as he leads you to the table serving refreshments and champagne by the arm. “Parties were never really my thing.”

“That makes two of us then,” you chuckle softly, hoping the other guests in the vicinity won’t overhear. “Do you know anyone else here? 

Chan shakes his head. “Right now? No. But she’ll come out later though.”

Now that piques your curiosity. “She?”

Your partner’s face immediately flushes at the realization that he just ratted himself out. He sighs, carding his fingers through his hair as he lets his eyes drift towards the orchestra in the far end of the room.

“You know the prince’s fiancèe, right? Hyejin?” he asks and you nod. “Well, we…live in the same town. We grew up together, she’s my best friend. But I haven’t seen her in a long time since she’s been confined at the castle for her assimilation and I trained for a few months in the southern cities.”

Chan absentmindedly twists the floral ring around his finger as he says the words. A nervous tic, maybe? There’s also a twinge of fondness in his voice that you vaguely recognize. It’s the same way your mother talks about your father. The same way Jihoon talks about his music. 

The same way Joshua talks about the things he does for Seraphia.

You don’t voice out your suspicions, aware that though you and Chan have developed some level of camaraderie as people who both feel out of place here, you’re not close enough to pry about his friendship with Hyejin. 

Besides, the ball is already beginning before you can even have a chance to contemplate doing so.

The royal family comes out one by one. First, the king and queen themselves—greeted by the loudest of applause by their loving people. You don’t see them very often, but it’s clear that the years are starting to catch up to them. Though the royal couple still looks stunning as always, no one can deny the graying streaks in their hair and the waning youthfulness on their faces. 

It’s no wonder everyone is anticipating Joshua and Hyejin’s wedding. 

The next is the eldest prince, Jeonghan. He emerges from the doors of the ballroom with confidence oozing in every stride. You’re certain that he's well aware that he’s easily the most controversial person inside this room, but this man just does not give a single damn. You find yourself admiring the way he carries himself—so similar to the way Joshua does, but not at the same time. 

And then…there’s the stars of the night.

You haven’t been counting time between now and the night you last saw Joshua, but it’s as if the months flit past you in mere seconds. If you haven’t realized just how much you actually missed him earlier, you do now. 

Joshua’s hair is longer, dipping in swift curls just above his eyes. He’s radiant—almost blinding in the way he smiles and waves at the crowd with his fiancèe in his arm. 

His fiancèe… Hyejin.

She’s easily the most gorgeous woman you’ve laid your eyes on today. There’s a hint of shyness on her face as she periodically nods at those they pass by to congratulate them, but there’s also a firm conviction that would reassure any onlooker that she knows exactly who she is and what she came here for. 

It’s one thing to overhear the rumors and gossip circulating around the city, but it’s another to actually see the intended couple in the flesh.

However, in the middle of the queen’s opening speech, you notice that Chan hasn’t said a single word to you since the ceremony started. You glance at him from the corner of your eye, intent on asking if he’s alright. But then you realize that his gaze is completely trained on Hyejin—completely enraptured by the sight of her. 

The way his hand tightens around the flute of his champagne glass isn’t lost on you, but you don’t comment on that either.

Next thing you know, the opening dance led by the next royal couple is starting, and you force yourself to watch despite how much it physically makes your heart ache.

Joshua and Hyejin are in perfect sync. Like two people who have known each other all their lives. They move fluidly to the music of the orchestra, eyes never leaving each other as they traverse the dance floor.

You vaguely remember hearing that Hyejin also practices plant magic, like Joshua used to years ago. It’s no wonder how in tune they are to each other’s movements. Their elemental affinities already make them such a perfect match.

Time passes by far too slowly and you’d almost consider watching the love of your life dancing so gleefully with someone who isn’t you another form of torture. Once the first song ends and all the other guests prepare for the exchange dances, you can’t help but breathe out a sigh in relief. 

Surprisingly enough, the idea of dancing with nobles you don’t even know doesn’t make you as nervous as you thought it would. With how much drunken dancing you’ve done with Seokmin and Yuta in the pub, you figure that this wouldn’t be that much different. You just have to keep yourself from stepping on anyone’s toes, probably. 

Of course, Chan takes up the title of being your first partner—doing a ceremonial bow that has you rolling your eyes at him before melting into a fit of laughter. You try to push down the visceral emotions that coiled in your chest only minutes before and let yourself enjoy the privilege of being invited to such an exclusive event. 

You’ll never have Joshua—this, you already know. And you’re not about to waste any more of your time moping over something that’s already set in stone.

The dances pass by in a blur. You get passed around to several gentlemen who are actually more amicable than you thought nobles would be. The partners get switched up so quickly, you barely get their names before parting ways. But you do recall dancing with a fellow who calls himself Haechan for two reasons:

The first is that he just would not stop boasting about the things his parents have done in their town, the affluence his family affords him, and the “fact” that women back home trip on their skirts chasing after him. 

The second is, while you’re busy awkwardly nodding and smiling at Haechan’s endless monologue, you spot Chan in the crowd of dancing guests—hand in hand with Hyejin herself.

If you thought she and Joshua were in sync, it’s as if Hyejin shares the same heartbeat with Chan with how they move together. They’re completely enraptured in each other. Despite the obvious banter going on between the two of them mid-dance, it’s as if they’re in their own little world—not a single care given to the people around them. 

You don’t know if you should feel happy for Chan or not because if your hunch is right…

Then that just means he’ll be forced to watch the love of his life marry someone else in a few months’ time—just like yourself.

By the grace of the gods, you’re finally liberated from Haechan’s clutches and into your next partner’s arms. But right after curtsying before him, you nearly trip on your own feet when you realize who it is.

“Fancy seeing you here,” Joshua greets, repeating the same words he told you back in Wonwoo’s shop a lifetime ago with the same smile that you see even in your dreams.

You can’t find the words. You can’t even muster up the courage to say hello or anything remotely similar. The words stick to your throat like cotton, despite the fact that you’ve spent countless nights imagining what you would say to the prince in the off chance that you’d get to speak to him again. 

Thankfully, Joshua is more attentive than you are and immediately gets into position once the next song starts playing. 

You try not to think about how warm the hand resting on your hip is; how perfectly your fingers seem to slot between the spaces his other hand the two of you sway to the beat. Because the more you think about it, the more you’ll remember. 

The more you’ll remember, the more you’ll hope.

And you’ve known for the longest time that hope is a fickle, fickle thing.

“Can I ask how you wound up on our guestlist, dear Ice Queen?”

Your magic doesn’t react very kindly to Joshua’s teasing, and you immediately feel the flesh of your fingers drop several degrees. Joshua seems to notice the sudden chill and laughs before twirling you around.

“I’m here as someone’s plus one, nothing else,” you explain with a sigh before forcibly retracting your magic. The last thing you want to do is accidentally kill the most influential person in this room next to the king and queen. “But…you could even say I missed you a little, Your Highness.”

What the hell? 

You have to fight the urge to cover your mouth with your hand because of the utter shamelessness in your words. But to your relief, Joshua seems to take it in stride—his handsome smile never ceasing.

“Forgive me, things have been…very hectic as of late,” he confesses with a sigh. “I didn’t mean to just stop showing up like I did but believe it or not, I’ve had very little free time since the engagement.”

You shake your head at that. “Why are you apologizing? You don’t owe us any of your time, you know. We’re happy to have served you before, and we’ll still be happy to do that even if it takes you fifty years to drop by again.”

“Now don’t be so obtuse! I’ll make sure to pay you a visit once things start mellowing out again. That’s a promise.”

Pay you a visit… 

You know he means everyone back in the pub as a whole. But that stupidly foolish voice in your head insists that you should let yourself dream sometimes—no matter how impossible.

“Don’t go make promises you can’t keep or everyone will be very disappointed, Prince Joshua,” you chuckle, willing any halfwitted thoughts away.

The prince shakes his head before reaching up to tuck a loose tuft of hair behind your ear. You aren’t able to school your surprise into something less pronounced in time, and you’re sure as hell he saw the way your eyes widened at the gesture.

“One thing you should know about me is that I always keep my word,” he murmurs so softly, you barely catch the words over the music. “Always.”

…Why is he doing this?

Why is he unknowingly stringing you along with a false sense of hope? Why is he acting so outlandishly affectionate in the company of a hundred other nobles who might see what he was doing? With his fiancèe in the same room, no less?

But for once—for goddamn once—you give in to the foolish part of your brain. To all the false hopes. To all the delusions. 

Just for one night, you let yourself believe that perhaps, if things were a little different, if you’d been just a little braver when you had the chance…

Joshua would’ve loved you back.

The song comes to an end and so does your brief daydream of a happy ever after. You spot Hyejin scurrying through the crowd in search of her fiancè in no time, and you lean closer to Joshua’s ear to let him know.

It shouldn’t surprise you how his face lights up. How quickly he turns around to see his intended for himself. And you shouldn’t feel as heartbroken as you do when all he does in farewell is give you a minute nod before reuniting with his future wife.

As you stand there, amidst a sea of nobles in a place where you don’t belong, the reality check you so direly needed finally dawns on you.

You’ll never have Joshua. Not in a million years. 

But you damn wish you could. 

As the head bartender of the pub for a few years now, you like to think that both your regulars and the new faces you see around have come to trust you easily. Aside from being able to mix and serve a spectrum of drinks off the menu, it’s implicit in your job description to be an empath. Sure, you can always just serve them their drinks and go about your day, but that transactional type of behavior doesn’t make people keep coming back for more, it’s your hospitable personality.

From puppy crushes to marriages ruined by third parties, you’ve been on the receiving end of countless stories from countless customers. While you’re no expert when it comes to love, it still pays to lend a willing ear to someone who direly needs it. Talking to people about their problems is easy; all you have to do is offer some comfort at the right time. 

So why are you suddenly so clueless when it comes to Prince Joshua’s predicament?

You thought you wouldn’t be seeing him again after that rainy night. That he’d drift out of your orbit like he usually does just when your heart starts to delude you into thinking he’s finally within reach again. But it’s as if the past year hadn’t happened at all, and the next thing you know, he’s back to visiting the pub disguised as a commoner all over again. 

You’re no fool, though. Despite the fact that Joshua seems to have settled back into his habit of observing others whilst nursing a glass of his favorite Oak Walker, things are far from the way they were back then. 

You often catch him lost in thought, staring so deeply into space that you’re almost always compelled to ask if he’s alright. But you don’t because you know he’s not alright and you intend to respect that by giving him the time and space he needs. 

But while you busy yourself concocting the orders of other patrons, a sinister voice in the back of your head whispers the foulest things. How the gods finally gave you another chance to have the prince to yourself. How the stars have surely aligned for Joshua’s engagement to come to an end just when you thought all hope was lost.

You ignore all these ridiculous thoughts. You’ve already accepted a long time ago that the prince would never see you the way he saw Hyejin. And you’re not so wicked that you’d take advantage of his state of vulnerability for your own gain.

After all, you’re his friend before anything else. If the day ever comes that Joshua would confide his sorrows in you, you’d tell him the words you think he needs to hear and offer just enough solace like you have with your past heartbroken patrons. 

Nothing more, nothing less.

Except he doesn’t do that. Joshua doesn’t say a single word about how and why he and Hyejin split ways. Instead, he comes into the pub one night and the look on his face makes you feel like something just…changed. The lines on his face make you think that he still carries that ever-present sadness in his heart, but tonight, you notice that he’s at least learned to smile again. 

It’s not the pearly white grin that he’d crack whenever Yuta makes a tactless joke, or the one he showed the day he ran into you in Wonwoo’s shop. But the fact that Joshua still has it in him to make the corners of his mouth turn up into a gentle smile reassures you that maybe you haven’t lost him to his grief just yet.

“I heard that there’s a group of traveling thespians visiting the capital for a while,” Joshua tells you while you’re in the middle of mixing a gin and tonic. “My brother adores the shows put up by theater troupes all over the continent so he got himself tickets to the show.”

“Okay,” you start, shooting him a curious look to let him keep going.

He hesitates for a sliver of a moment, which is odd because Joshua is someone who’s always sure of himself. Almost awkwardly, he clears his throat—averting his eyes before continuing.

“But it just so happens that Jeonghan had to rush over to Ancarra to deal with a little problem. He won’t be in the capital once the troupe arrives, so he gave me the tickets instead.” Joshua pauses and chews the inside of his cheek. Then, he quietly adds:

“Would you like to accompany me to the show?”

If you were the same person you were a year ago, you probably would’ve dropped the glasses you were just about to hand to Sungchan. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen and all your younger coworker does is ask if you’re okay before you reassure him that it’s nothing he should worry about.

When Sungchan is out of earshot, you glance at Joshua once more. “Come again?”

“I asked if you wanted to go to the show with me,” he says point-blank, the smile on his face widening ever-so slightly. “Of course, there’s absolutely no pressure for you to accept. It’s just a waste of another ticket if I don’t bring anyone else with me to enjoy it.”

…There it is again—that traitorous flare of hope sizzling in your chest. 

How could you not feel it when Joshua makes it sound like, if you ever refuse, he won’t even try asking any of his other friends and acquaintances to go with him? To even consider anyone else other than you as a worthwhile companion to a show that costs an arm and a leg just to see? 

You should hate it; this push and pull you constantly suffer through when it comes to him. The most logical choice is to refuse. But, though you’re loath to admit it…

You’re nothing if not a hopeless fool for him. 

“Sure thing,” you tell him with a face as smooth as butter. “What time does the show start?”

The traveling theater troupe is one of the best you’ve seen. Contrary to your expectations, the tickets didn’t, in fact, cost an arm and a leg. Their group is apparently very well known as thespians who make their tickets affordable for all walks of life. The audience wasn’t confined to a bunch of nobles with extra cash to burn, and the sight of common people like you being able to occupy seats in the capital’s amphitheater warmed your heart more than it should.

Their play is about two would-be lovers who met in their childhood only to meet again eventually as adults. A typical romance between a commoner and a noblewoman that you’ve heard about in every cheap pocketbook that Kazuha likes to read in her spare time. But despite how cliché the story is, the actors easily brought forth a spectrum of emotions that you wouldn’t be able to fully invest yourself in from reading books alone. 

When the male lead was about to die in his lover’s arms, you were already in tears—not even having the hindsight to wipe the moisture off your face as you’re too entranced with the show. But the sound of your companion’s low laughter snaps you out of the momentary surge in emotions. 

You whip your head to face Joshua with a puzzled look, scrambling to dab away the tears in your eyes before asking, “W-What’s so funny?”

The prince shakes his head beneath the hood of his cloak—still disguised for his own safety—before reaching a hand out to gently scrape his knuckles across your damp cheek. “Nothing. I just didn’t think you’d feel so strongly about the story. I was afraid you were growing bored, actually.”

It takes you a moment to process what he was saying to you because your brain is hyper focused on the way his skin feels against yours. Joshua doesn’t just wipe the tears away. He even pats the side of your face with unfamiliar tenderness before retracting his hand back to his side.

Your heart feels like it’s slowly climbing up your throat before finding its place in the roof of your mouth. It would be easier to down five consecutive shots of vodka than fight back the urge to reach for his hand again, but you force yourself to hold your ground. You have to.

“I’m glad to see that you’re enjoying,” he murmurs, brown eyes riveting back to the actors on stage. “Jeonghan spoke very highly of this particular troupe, so I wouldn’t really question the quality of their performances. But seeing them for myself is…an experience.”

“It really is,” you can’t help but murmur in agreement.

(Un)fortunately for you, that’s not the end of it.

The prince’s invitations grow even more frequent as the weeks pass by. If he’d just asked you to share a few drinks together at the pub after hours, you would’ve been able to handle it just fine. Your workplace is comfortable enough for you to forget the fact that Joshua is someone you’re still in the process of getting rid of your feelings for. But for him to ask if you’re free to accompany him in places other than the pub? In broad daylight, no less?

You’re not sure how to feel as a platoon of knights flank you on both sides while Joshua leads you back to an orphanage. He’s telling you about how this place has been under close watch by his brother for years now and that Jeonghan asked him to check on the kids living here from time to time. While you’re glad that he’s back to busying himself with some princely duties, you can’t help but notice the way the knights would glance at you every so often.

You can almost picture the question going through their heads: how could Prince Joshua spend time with another woman when it hasn’t been that long since the engagement was called off? The mere thought of being perceived as some sort of replacement for Hyejin makes you sick to your stomach. You feel the familiar dregs of frost tingling across the skin of your palms, a chill running down the length of your spine. 

That’s another reason why you don’t want yourself to pursue Joshua. You don’t want to be branded as an opportunist of some sort—both by the general public and yourself.

But once you finally make it inside, Joshua instructs the knights to stand by at the courtyard, not wanting to frighten the children by their presence. You’re convinced that at least one of them would protest, but they all receive the prince’s order with surprising obedience. Being freed from their intent stares definitely makes things easier for you.

The orphanage isn’t as massive as you initially thought. Joshua further explains that the director is the daughter of one of Seraphia’s many royal mages. After her father’s passing, she repurposed their family manor into a home for children abandoned by their parents—giving them a more favorable future than they’d otherwise have in the streets.  

From what you can tell, the orphans residing here have been raised with love and care when you meet them. What’s more is that many of the children can already practice their own magic, and it’s for that reason that the royal family—particularly, Jeonghan—is keeping tabs on this place. 

“They’re the next generation of mages that will make the kingdom prosper one day,” Joshua says, quoting his brother. “I don’t stop by here very often, but even I can tell that the mentors Jeonghan hired have been very effective with their teachings.”

As if on cue, two of the children shuffle forward with meek strides. The girl introduces herself as Eri and the boy, Iseul. They flash you and Joshua vibrant smiles before placing a string of vibrant wisterias around both of your necks. 

“Prince Joshua, you’re back!” Iseul giggles with a toothy grin. “But…where’s the other miss? Weren’t you going to marry her?”

The abrupt question makes Eri scowl at Iseul in disbelief. “I-Iseul, don’t be rude!”

“But I was just curious,” the younger boy sulks. 

An uneasy feeling settles in your chest at their words. That could only mean Joshua has brought his ex-fiancée here before, right? Then again, why wouldn’t he? If Hyejin is as benevolent as the newspaper clippings from back then suggested, she wouldn’t be past visiting orphans at least once in her life.

“The miss from back then is fine. She’s already with the person she truly loves,” Joshua explains with a kind smile, crouching down to ruffle Iseul’s hair. “Don’t worry about her. I’m still making sure she’s safe even if we’re no longer in contact.”

The prince’s quiet admission has your eyes widening a fraction. You can’t tell if he’s simply feeding the children a little lie to pacify them, but that’s much too specific a coverup to not have some truth veiled behind it.

As Eri and Iseul scurry back to where the other children are playing, you let your thoughts scatter for a moment. You distinctly recall the time you last went to the royal ball as Chan’s plus one; that brief moment where you saw him and Joshua’s ex-fiancée dancing together as if they’re the ones who were engaged.

Once the pieces finally click, you have to stifle a gasp.

She’s already with the person she truly loves

It all makes sense now.

“Eri made these herself, you know.”

You decide to think of Hyejin and Chan’s relationship some other time, glancing at Joshua inquisitively before perusing the fragrant flowers around your neck. “Really? How?”

“Using the same magic you saw me use all those years ago,” the prince explains with a small smile. “Eri always hesitated with her conjuring magic the last time I was here, but it seems like she’s growing more comfortable with using it day by day.”

“How about you?”

“Hm? What do you mean?”

You swallow thickly, unsure if you’re even in the position to ask him this. “I mean… Aren’t you comfortable with using your own magic? Just like Eri is?”

The silence that settles between the two of you is eclipsed by the gleeful noises from the children playing in the wide living area. Joshua’s face is unreadable as he considers your question, and you fear that you might’ve touched up on something that you definitely shouldn’t have.

“...Well, if I’m being honest,” he begins, “I’m not. I haven’t used my magic in years, and I’m afraid that even little Eri is better at conjuring flowers than I’ll ever be.”

You snort. “That’s not true, and you know it.”

“It still doesn’t change the fact that I don’t really have any use for it,” Joshua sighs before raking his fingers through his hair. “Me and my brother grew up being taught that we can always just rely on the royal mages if we end up needing to use magic.”

“But don’t you miss it though?” you wonder. “My magic isn’t the most…convenient, but I can’t imagine living without it. It’s…part of me, you know? I just don’t like thinking about how you’re repressing something that’s clearly a part of you, too.”

Never in a million lifetimes did you think that you’d be speaking about your magic in a positive light. The ice has always been difficult to deal with—especially in times when your emotions are all over the place. But despite that, you wouldn’t be who you are today if it weren’t for your magic.

“I…” Joshua’s voice trails off as he stares at you with wide eyes. “I never really thought about it that way.”

“That’s because you’re too busy being the perfect prince for the people,” you scoff before lightly punching him in the shoulder. “Think about yourself for once, will you?”

“Myself, huh…”

He falls into another bout of silence as if what you said reminded him of something. You don’t pry this time though, letting your eyes drift back to the children instead. But part of you hopes that he’ll take your words into consideration and start being less strict with himself.

Once you both leave the orphanage and Joshua dismisses the other knights, he asks if you want to stop by the Jeon Flower Emporium before he walks you home—an invitation that you’re flattered to receive, yes, but…

“You don’t have to walk me home,” you insist frantically. “I don’t want to take up more of your time than I already did. Besides, I’m familiar with this part of the city, and it isn’t even dusk—”

“What sort of gentleman would I be if I just let the person I invited out for the day go home by herself?” Joshua chuckles softly before flashing you a reassuring smile. “I promise it’s no big deal. It’s not like I have anything of dire consequence to attend to these days.”

Those last few words have you thinking for a moment. You have noticed that Joshua has a lot more free time to spend wandering around the capital than you’re used to. It makes you wonder if the royal family is giving him much needed time to recuperate from what happened with his engagement. 

The knowledge puts you at ease somewhat. Joshua definitely deserves a break after everything he’s been through for the past few weeks.

“Fine,” you relent. “My mother’s been asking me to check on Wonwoo anyways.”

Your childhood friend is in the middle of closing up the shop when you and Joshua arrive. But when Wonwoo’s bespectacled gaze catches sight of the two of you, he immediately stops what he’s doing to meet you by the entrance.

“It’s been a while since you stopped by. Both of you,” Wonwoo comments with a surprised look. 

Joshua laughs. “Well, things have been a little—no, very busy. I’m sure you’ve heard the news.”

Your eyes nearly bug out of their sockets at the nonchalant manner that Joshua addresses the proverbial elephant in the room. All this time, you kept yourself from encroaching on the topic out of fear that it would be a sore spot for him. Yet here he is, bringing it up just like he would the weather.

Wonwoo, the most polite person you know, meets your eyes as if asking for silent confirmation. Is this really okay? He seems to wonder and all you can muster is an awkward smile of your own.

“I…have heard the news,” he says, clearing his throat. “I’m very sorry for what happened, Your Highness.”

The prince shakes his head. “Please, don’t be. We mutually decided on it for both our sakes. Although that aside, I know you’re already closing up, but is it alright to place an impromptu order?”

You and Wonwoo have the same expressions on your face when you both stare at Joshua incredulously. The prince looks one hundred percent serious about his request though, making you wonder why on earth he’d need to purchase flowers all of a sudden.

“Um, of course.” Wonwoo recovers from the stupor fairly quickly before dusting his hands on his apron. “What would you like, Your Highness?”

For the first time since you’ve met him, the smile on Joshua’s face is something that borders on…mischievous. It’s a look you’ve seen Jeonghan wear in the rare chance you do get to meet the eldest prince in person. But you can’t even begin to wonder what would prompt Joshua to flash Wonwoo the same expression. 

Although you do find out shortly after.

“I refuse.”

“Why? You seemed to like it the last time I gave you flowers.”

“Flower. It was just a single daisy, not a whole bouquet!”

“Is it so bad if I want to give something as a token of appreciation? For letting me drag you all over the place even if it’s inconvenient?”

“Oh, so you are aware it’s inconvenient for me?”

“Hence the reason I’m expressing my utmost gratitude.”

Of all the ways you could’ve imagined today turning out, being gifted a bouquet that Wonwoo put together by Prince Joshua is the last thing that would come to mind. Your old friend didn’t seem to have any problems with catering to the sudden request and happily agreed to prepare it while you and Joshua waited in front of the shop.

“You don’t get it, Your Highness,” you sigh exasperatedly, embarrassment prickling the back of your neck. “You can’t just buy flowers for everyone you’re grateful for! Especially after… Ah, whatever! People might get the wrong idea, you know!”

Joshua pouts a little—very unprincely of him, but still disarmingly adorable. “While I take the citizens’ feelings to heart, I don’t see how my personal gifts to you are any of their business.”

Your jaw nearly drops at his admission. Is he being real with you right now?

The next moment, you feel several eyes on your form again—boring their judgemental stares deep into your skin until you can feel the oncoming chill of your magic reacting to them. You let your eyes dart around for a moment, and just like Joshua’s knights from earlier, you spot several passers-by sneaking glances at you and Joshua. 

Given that the trip to the orphanage was an official royal visit, the prince chose to forego his usual disguises. Now here he is, out in the open—bickering with some commoner who’s definitely not the woman he was engaged to just a month ago.

Fuck. You can already see your name plastered on next week’s Daily Tribune.

“An order of daisies to go?”

Wonwoo’s reappearance manages to salvage you from your spiraling train of thought. Joshua steps in before you can even utter another protest, handing him the payment for his purchase before cradling the flowers in his arms.

“Thank you, Wonwoo,” the prince utters with a small nod. “We’ll be heading off now. Take care on your way home.”

Your bespectacled friend doesn’t respond right away. His gaze is trained on the beautiful bunch of daisies he expertly put together. You think he was simply admiring his own handiwork, but then Wonwoo’s eyes flit to Joshua, and then to you. 

His lips curl into a smile that implies he might know something you don’t.

“Of course,” he chuckles. “Thank you as well for your patronage.”

Despite your repeated objections, Joshua ends up walking you home anyways. 

He may be the kingdom’s most esteemed gentleman, but the prince will insist on something he wants to the ends of the earth if he can help it. It’s a good thing that Wonwoo’s shop isn’t very far from your own house, saving you the sheer embarrassment from having to carry a bouquet of flowers with Prince Joshua himself by your side.

“Guess that concludes another eventful day,” he chuckles as you fumble for the keys. “A day well spent indeed.”

You let yourself glare at him for a moment before jamming the key to the front door in the hole. “You’re going to be the death of me one of these days. I genuinely wonder why I’m such a good friend to you.”

Before you can even twist the key to turn the locks, the prince suddenly takes a hold of the hand not holding the bouquet of daisies. You startle at the contact, but before you can even call him out for surprising you like that, Joshua brings the back of your hand up for a kiss.

You can barely feel the brush of his lips on your skin—much too mesmerized by how those honey brown eyes never leave your face as he does it. The gesture lasts for barely a moment, but it feels like lifetimes have unspooled before he peels himself away and lets your hand fall limply by your side.

“I wonder that, too,” he murmurs, the ghost of a smile hovering across his face. “I’ll be going now. Good night, Ice Queen.”

Joshua doesn’t even give you any room to respond. The prince merely straightens himself out, directs another curt nod your way before turning on his heel.

Later in the evening, you lay in bed with Joshua’s flowers sitting in a vase by your nightstand. Even as you stare at the ceiling of your room, the faint fragrance still manages to waft to your nose.

That night, you dream of a time you think you’ll never forget. Of rushing rivers and a runaway pup. 

Of a young prince and flowers given to the brave.

“You’re what?”

That’s Kazuha’s first reaction when you brought her up to speed about everything that transpired while she was gone. As much as you want to celebrate her return and the success of her training in the northern regions, going months without anyone to directly confide in does things to your brain.

“Shhh,” you hiss, glancing around the bar frantically in case there were any eavesdroppers. Then, you lean closer, lowering your voice when you say, “We’ve been…going out quite frequently for the past two months. ”

She gasps as if that was the most scandalous thing she’s heard all day before taking a moment to take a sip of her ale. “Going out…like, romantically? You’re going out with the same person you’ve been mooning over for the past two years?” 

“No!” you immediately retort. “I-I have not been mooning over Prince Joshua! And I wouldn’t say that the nature of our…get-togethers is romantic! He’s just comfortable around me is all.”

Kazuha rolls her eyes. “Please. Yuta has been keeping in touch with me through letters. You know my older brother is an even bigger gossip-monger than our regulars in this place. He says you always look at the prince as if he hung all the stars in the sky!”

“Could you please not broadcast that where everyone can hear?” you plead, resisting the urge to pour yourself a mug of beer while you’re still on the clock. “And is there anything else that Yuta told you that I need to know?”

You partly mean that in jest, but a bigger part of you is worried that Yuta must’ve told his sister about…the fooling around you did with him several months prior. But when Kazuha says, “Not much. He just goes on and on about his new job and asks how training is going,” you let yourself breathe out a sigh in relief.

“Speaking of Yuta though, he hasn’t visited in a while.” You let yourself think about when exactly Yuta last dropped by the pub, but you’re drawing blanks. Not even Shotaro could give you an answer when you flagged him down from bussing tables to ask.

But all thoughts of your arch-nemesis are promptly forgotten when Kazuha diverts the topic back to your…interesting ventures with Prince Joshua.

“Aren’t you happy?” she asks. “You finally have a chance to get with the man you so obviously harbor feelings for. I might be a little idiotic for not noticing sooner, but it’s better late than never to be supportive, right?”

While your first instinct would have been to deny any and all allegations about having feelings for Joshua, her question has you thinking.

Ever since Joshua bought you that bouquet from Wonwoo’s, his behavior has changed drastically. You understand why Kazuha would jump to the conclusion that your excursions have some romantic undertone to them from hearing the stories alone because the way the prince has been treating you lately has you second-guessing everything you’ve ever known.

He always buys you thoughtful presents no matter how much you insist he doesn’t have to. He always lingers long beyond closing time in the pub just to make sure you get home safely. Even the way he looks at you has changed. There’s always this…fondness in his eyes that wasn’t always there. 

If one of your patrons came up to you and told you a similar story, you would’ve told them that the other person involved is definitely head over heels in love. But…this is Joshua. Prince Joshua. The man you’ve long resigned yourself to never being more than friends with.

The man you can never have.

Speaking of the devil, the doors to the pub are pushed wide open by two newcomers. You’re not surprised by the first one—Joshua always makes time to visit you at work at least once or twice a week. But you’re very much taken off guard by the identity of his companion.

“So this is the place my little brother has been boasting about non-stop,” Prince Jeonghan comments with an impressed look, eyes roving across the crowd that’s just as stunned with their entrance as you are. Even Seokmin paused from his live performance just to gawk at him. “Well? We’re no strangers here, everyone. Just keep going about your night like always.”

Your patrons all glance at each other warily before doing just as the eldest prince told them to. The usual din of the pub fades back into your ears in no time, but that doesn’t make you any less surprised with their visit.

“Hello,” Joshua greets with a sigh as he slides in his usual seat at the bar, just next to Kazuha. “Forgive me. Jeonghan has been pestering me about where I’ve been sneaking off to all the time and it just so happens that he decided to tail me tonight.”

Jeonghan snorts before taking the vacant seat on Kazuha’s right, the brothers flanking the poor girl on both sides. “As much as I’m pleased to know that Shua is no longer distraught over what happened with our dear Hyejin, you can’t blame me for being curious about the reason why.” 

“Brother,” the younger prince groans. 

Of course, Jeonghan all but ignores Joshua’s pleas to be discreet. “Can you whip us up your best drinks off the menu? One of the knights told me about this pub’s famous Oak Walker in passing.”

“Coming right up, Your Highness,” Kazuha quickly responds, hopping out of her seat before taking her rightful place behind the bar. Before you can even protest, she shushes you with a finger to your lips. 

“Go entertain our very high-profile guests,” she whispers. “I’ll take care of the rest with Sungchan and Shotaro. Just keep them occupied enough, okay?”

You can only nod in defeat.

So that’s how you end up occupying the stool that your coworker was sitting on five minutes prior. You still feel bad for unwittingly making Kazuha work on her first night back in the capital, but you have to admit that it’s nice seeing her back in action again. She expertly maneuvers around the bar like she hasn’t been gone a day.

“What brings you here, Your Highness?” You decide to break the ice before your nerves can get the best of you once Kazuha serves the three of you one glass of Oak Walker each. “Prince Joshua mentioned that you weren’t a fan of drinking in crowded places, so it’s…really surprising to see you here.”

Jeonghan chuckles and props his elbow on the wooden counter—resting his chin on the palm of his hand.

“Like I said, I was simply curious about Shua’s trysts. Here I thought he was getting frisky with some maiden in the middle of the night, but…maybe I’m not all too far off after all.” 

His tacky response earns him another groan from Joshua. “Jeonghan, I only agreed to bring you here tonight because you promised not to stir things up.”

“I’m not stirring things up! I’m simply stating things as I see them,” the older prince laughs before taking his first sip. “Oh. The knights weren’t lying. This is some finely aged whiskey you’ve got here.”

“It’s a family recipe that’s been passed on for decades,” Kazuha quips behind the bar with a proud smile. “Although our head bartender over here has done most of the tweaks and improvements to the mix. You’ve got her to thank for the astounding flavor.”

Jeonghan nods before helping himself to another gulp. “I’d expect no less for someone who’s caught Joshua’s eye.”

“Jeonghan.”

…Caught Joshua’s eye? In what way, exactly?

“Alright, alright. I’ll tone it down with the teasing,” Jeonghan finally relents with a simper before turning to you. “So you’re the infamous Ice Queen, eh? Do I want to know what you’ve done in the past to warrant such an…interesting nickname?”

“That’s just something one of the other staff members calls her in jest,” Joshua sighs before halving the contents of his glass in one go. The way he slams it back down on the counter would’ve made you laugh, but you’re too high strung because of Jeonghan’s presence to even crack a grin. 

“Oh, my dear Shua, I wasn’t talking to you. Didn’t you learn in our many etiquette classes that it’s rude to talk over other people?” Jeonghan tuts. “Anyway, Miss Ice Queen, care to give us a quick display of your magic?”

You blink for a moment before letting your eyes catch Joshua’s. The younger prince flashes you an apologetic smile, mouthing the words I’m sorry before you turn to Jeonghan with a deep breath. 

As much as he intimidates the living hell out of you, you’re not very keen with the way he’s pushing your friend’s buttons so…

“Sure thing,” you say, trying your best to offer up a convincing enough smile…

Before wrapping a hand around Jeonghan’s glass and turning his drink into a cylinder of amber ice.

Joshua lets out an unbecoming snort to your left and Jeonghan’s jaw drops at your blatant display of petulance. You force yourself to hold the smug look on your face in an attempt at getting your point across. No one gets to mess with Joshua on your watch, even his older brother.

“I like you, Ice Queen,” Jeonghan cackles as he turns his glass upside down—the frozen drink staying solidly in place. “But please tell me this comes with a complimentary replacement? I might not look like it but I’m actually parched.”

It’s the first time in literal months that the pub started to feel like home again. Not only did Kazuha return from being out of town for months, but you found a new friend in Prince Jeonghan himself. The eldest prince took it upon himself to pay for everyone’s orders for tonight—earning the immense favor of your patrons. Jeonghan even bought a few rounds of drinks for Sungchan, Shotaro, Jihoon, and Seokmin once closing time came around. 

The only thing missing from the equation is…Yuta. 

You wonder where he is right now.

“Well, I best head out now,” Jeonghan announces just when Shotaro finished serving Jeonghan’s treat to everyone who stayed behind. “Unlike my little brother, our parents don’t know me as some fiend who has his share of nightly ventures. I best head back to the castle before anyone notices I’m gone for too long.”

Joshua snorts into his drink—a tinge of scarlet on the tips of his ears indicating some degree of inebriation. “You’re just worried that the princess will kill you if you leave her alone in her room for even a minute longer.”

Now that makes you pause. 

Princess? As far as you know, Seraphia hasn’t had a princess since the queen got hailed as…well, the queen. But you’re a little too tipsy to make sense of the logic behind the royal family tree.

“Must you single me out the same way I do with you, Shua?” Jeonghan sighs before making his way to the door. “You kids enjoy the rest of your drinks. Make sure to get home safely, all of you.”

“You’re only two years older,” Joshua points out.

“Old enough to buy the entire pub several rounds of drinks.” 

“With the king and queen’s money?” 

“Hey! I’ll have you know that the royal family’s money comes from the people’s hard-earned taxes!” Jeonghan balks. “I’m simply giving back to our beloved constituents.”

“Gods above, just leave!” Jihoon bemoans in his seat from where he nurses a cup of coffee instead. “And I thought Yuta and Kazuha’s bickering couldn’t get any worse.”

Jeonghan lets out one last chuckle before swinging the door to the pub open—letting the late autumn air breeze inside the pub. 

“Ah, there’s nothing more that I love than people who aren’t afraid to tell me off,” he chuckles before letting the door click shut behind him.

After the last round, Jihoon and Seokmin hail a carriage in the late night streets as their neighborhood is a bit of a ways away from the pub. Sungchan and Shotaro both promise that they’d bring Kazuha safe and sound back to her father’s house, despite the fact that the young servers can’t even walk straight. And Joshua takes up the mantle of the one who walks you home like always. 

If you’d been just a bit more sober, you would’ve noticed the way Seokmin and Jihoon shared A Look when Joshua announced that he’ll be chaperoning you. The way Kazuha’s lips were upturned into a mischievous yet supportive smile. But you don’t take note of any of this—simply looping your arms around the prince’s waist as he keeps you from stumbling into the pavement.

“Gods, it’s been a while since I’ve gotten drunk on someone else’s expense,” you hiccup all while trying to blink the spots out of your vision. “Is Jeonghan always that generous to people he’s just met? I don’t get why he’s so unpopular if that’s the case.”

Joshua chuckles as he untangles your arms around his waist so he can heft one over his shoulder to maneuver you around more comfortably. “No. He only does that for people he likes. Which aren’t a lot. He’s a very good judge of character though.”

“Did he know, then?”

“About what?”

“About Hyejin loving someone else?”

Despite the silence that settles into the night, the sound of your footsteps beating across the cobblestone rings loudly in your ears. Your mind doesn’t quite process just how long it takes for Joshua to respond. You simply find yourself attentively listening when he answers with:

“Yes. He did know. It’s hard to keep things from someone like Jeonghan.”

You snort. “Even your little visits to the pub?”

“Even those,” Joshua agrees with a small smile.

After walking in silence for a few minutes more, the cold evening air starts to seep through your clothes—making your body tremble with an involuntary shiver. You frown, unsure why the chill is affecting you the way it is now. You’re fully aware that winter is coming to Seraphia very soon, but the onset of it never once made you feel this off-kilter.

Oh, well. Maybe it’s just the alcohol.

“Say, Your Highness…” 

Joshua glances at you just as you both round a street corner. “What?”

You struggle to keep your wits about you as you stare at his handsome face. Though he’s marginally less intoxicated than you are, there’s still a tinge of redness speckled across his cheeks. Cute.

“Why are you such a good prince?” you wonder. “Back then, you were always doing the things Jeonghan’s supposed to be doing… It’s like you’re the older brother.”

“That’s not true,” Joshua responds quickly as he helps you step over a pothole in the road. “He’s…someone who likes working behind the scenes. But I can’t deny that Jeonghan sometimes likes to jeopardize his own reputation for reasons even I don’t completely understand.”

“But why are you working so hard in the front lines anyway?”

Another pause. Your eyes briefly catch on the way Joshua’s throat bobs. 

“Because I want to be king,” he murmurs.

You arch an eyebrow, guessing that it is natural for someone like Joshua to want that when he’s technically second in line for the crown. But…there’s something about the way he says it that doesn’t seem as sincere as you thought the words should sound like.

“Okay. Why do you want to be king?”

He glances at you again, rightfully confused, but the look melts into soft, gentle laughter. The sound reverberates deep in his chest and it somehow warms you up amidst the cool evening air.

“Do you want the answer I tell my parents and the rest of the royal court or the actual answer?”

Rolling your eyes, you playfully bump your knee against his leg. “Of course I want the actual answer, idiotic prince.”

“Alright,” he relents surprisingly quickly. “Well…it’s because I want to keep helping more people. If I have the power and authority of a king, I’d be able to do that on a much larger scale than what I’m currently capable of now.”

Your face scrunches up at his line of reasoning. “But…you can still help a lot of people even if you’re not king, right?”

“Yes, but I’d have a better chance at helping everyone if I was—”

You let your body move before your thoughts could completely catch up to what Joshua is trying to say. One of your fingers rests against the plush give of the prince’s lips as you silence him, supporting your wobbly stance by placing your other hand on his shoulder to steady yourself.

“Prince Joshua, not even the gods can save everyone,” you slur, shaking your head vigorously. “You’re not a child anymore, so I’m sure you know that very well. And don’t lie. I’ve been hanging out with you long enough to know that you don’t like the idea of becoming king at all. You just want to help people ‘cause you’ve got a heart of gold. That’s it.” 

…Maybe you shouldn’t be making baseless assumptions about what Joshua wants and doesn’t want to do with his life, but you’re sick of it. Sick of seeing him willingly put the expectations of other people on his shoulders.

Sick of seeing him think of everyone but himself.

Then you do something you never would’ve had the guts to do without the liquid courage coursing through your system. You pull Joshua down into a tight embrace that causes him to make a strangled noise in the back of his throat. 

“I told you to stop being so selfless, didn’t I?” you grumble, burying your face in the crook of his neck as your own face starts to heat up. You have a hunch that it’s probably not because of the alcohol. 

“Let yourself live a little. No thinking about other people. No altruistic agendas. Just enjoy your life just like you’ve been doing for the past few months.”

When you lift your head back to meet his eyes, there’s a look in Joshua’s honey browns that you don’t think you’ve ever seen before. 

It dawns on you just how close you are—bodies pressed together amidst the oncoming winter chill. His breath comes out a little unevenly, gaze smoldering with an emotion you can’t quite pin down. 

Never in your wildest dreams could you have dreamed of the prince who’s the epitome of the perfect gentleman looking at you the way you’ve been looking at him for years now.

Like he wants something he shouldn’t.

You don’t know how it happens, why it happens but you somehow end up with your back pressed against the wall of an alley right next to the bookshop you often pass by on your way home. Holding you in place is none other than the prince himself.

Your brain is seemingly absent when you feel the heat of Joshua’s mouth enveloping yours as his fingers dig into your spine—pressing you closer even if there’s no longer any distance to separate the both of you.

His touch rakes so impossibly hot against your clothes that you can’t find it in your heart to care when your embarrassing mewls are muffled by his lips. It doesn’t help that Joshua has his knee pressed between your thighs, effectively inching your legs apart as he kisses the life out of you underneath the glow of an old streetlamp.

The prince pulls away for only a moment—pressing his forehead against yours as earnest eyes bore into your soul. Joshua’s breath fans across your face in a way that makes your skin tingle with corrosive desire and you fear that you won’t be able to go back from this anymore. Not when he’s given you a taste of something you’ve been unknowingly craving for the longest time. 

“You don’t know what you do to me,” he whispers. “You haven’t the slightest clue.”

Part of you wants to tell him that you do. That he demonstrated just exactly what you do to him. But there’s not enough space in your frazzled mind to tease the man you’re so hopelessly in love with. 

Instead, you pull him in for another mind-numbing kiss, fingers tangled in his rich brown tresses as Joshua devours you like he’s been starving his whole life. 

All this time, you felt as if you’re walking on thin ice with him—careful to not break the surface. The friendship you’ve cultivated was easy. It offered you the security of his constant presence with no room for uncertainty.

But right here, in a dingy alley with no one but the stars that Joshua himself hung in the sky to bear witness, you realize it’s so much easier to just let yourself drown in him.

It’s filthy. It’s beautiful. 

It’s all you’ve ever wanted and more.

But you should have known it was too good to be true.

Just as all dreams tend to, the one you shared with Joshua ended in the morning with a raging migraine making itself at home deep in your skull. 

The sheets are cold, so is the stale air that lingers inside your bedroom. When you stare at the spot your nighttime lover had occupied when you both tumbled into blissful slumber, you find it empty. No sign of him anywhere inside your house. No notes left explaining where he went without waking you. 

You’re all alone with a trail of clothes littering your bedroom floor. None of them belonging to a certain honey-eyed prince.

You let yourself wallow in denial for a while—thinking that the reason Joshua left in a rush was because he had to reassure those back at the royal castle that he hadn’t been abducted in the middle of the night. 

He’d come around in a few days with a string of apologies prepared in advance. Maybe you’ll even spot him rushing into the pub later tonight—another one of his many gifts in hand as he expresses his utmost contrition. 

But the prince doesn’t show up that night. Or the night after that. And the night after that.

The days eventually bleed into weeks and you hear absolutely nothing from Joshua the entire time. 

You’re convinced that you managed to play it off as casually as you can. Either that or the rest of the pub’s staff is just good at not asking questions they have no business asking. The way that Kazuha occasionally looks at you with a worried look on her face when she thinks you don’t notice proves that the case is definitely the latter.

It’s not a big deal. This is just one of the many scenarios you’ve heard a few patrons tell you about—being left in the morning after by someone they’ve given their entire world the previous night. You always tell them that it’ll get easier in time.

But you don’t want it to get easier in time. You’ve wasted enough of that—investing years’ worth of love into a man who’ll never truly be there to reciprocate your feelings the way you want him to. It stings like a million arrows to the chest, like being stampeded by an army of knights riding into war.

Loving Prince Joshua was never easy, but this is the first time it ever truly hurt.

“Hey.”

You’re in the middle of cleaning a bunch of glasses when your ears perk up at a familiar voice you haven’t heard in a while. 

Yuta takes a seat in front of the bar with his usual mirth startlingly absent. Given how long since he last showed up around these parts, you at least expected him to have that stupid smirk plastered across his face when he finally drops by again. 

But all he greets you with is an uncharacteristically serious look that reminds you of the time he propositioned you for a kiss.

“Hey yourself,” you greet him back. “Kazuha’s not here, by the way. She’s dealing with some extra requirements needed to confirm her graduation from the Academy—”

“I know that,” Yuta deadpans. “She’s the one who asked me to come here.”

You make a face at that. “Why?”

Your old coworker rolls his eyes. “Can’t you at least pretend to be happy to see me again?”

Annoyed, you conjure up a tiny blunt icicle to launch into his face, but Yuta evades it swiftly with a scowl. “Wow, now you’ve resorted to attacking me, too?”

“That’s my way of saying I missed you, moron,” you grit out before bringing out two empty mugs from the shelves. “So what are you having tonight, Mister Swordsmith?”

While you and Yuta catch up, you ask Shotaro to man the bar in the meantime—a request that the younger man is nervous but happy to accept. That gives you enough time to finally speak to the one person you never thought you’d ever want to catch up with in the first place, given your consistent track record for pissing each other off.

But then again, Yuta has always been full of surprises.

“What?” 

Rage colors the tone of his voice when he asks, but you know perfectly well that Yuta heard every word you just said. You feel the pricks of shame in your chest as you attempt to drown it with a generous gulp of beer. The you from a year ago would’ve been mortified at the idea of spilling your most recent tryst with the man you’ve loved for more than a decade, but it is what it is.

Nonetheless, you repeat yourself anyway. “I…slept with the prince, and he was gone when morning came. Haven’t heard from him in almost a month and I’m not about to go looking for him either.”

You absentmindedly glide your finger along the rim of your glass, trying not to wallow in self-pity as Yuta processes the words in his head. But the reverie lasts for only a few seconds before your friend lets out a long, deep sigh.

“You know you deserve better than that, right?” 

You shrug. “Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. But what’s the use of knowing what I deserve when I can’t really do anything about it anymore?”

“I knew you were an idiot, Ice Queen, but I didn’t think it was this bad,” Yuta makes another exasperated noise before taking another swig of his drink. 

Now it was your turn to scowl. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Yuta leans forward on the table, making sure his eyes are leveled with yours as he stares you down with a look that would’ve intimidated everyone else but you. 

“You always think so little of yourself. Just because that guy is some hotshot royal, doesn’t mean he can get to walk all over your feelings like that. You’ve gotta learn how to assert yourself better,” he lectures. “Try acting around Prince Charming the way you act with me, sometimes. You were never afraid to set things straight whenever my jokes go a little too far, when you’re tired of me sleeping around with a bunch of our customers. 

“So what in the nine hells is stopping you from marching up to the castle and demanding a proper conversation from him? You’ve been hung up on the guy for fuck knows how long. The least he can do is give you a goddamn explanation for leaving you all alone that day.”

You’ve never liked Yuta’s very crass way of talking, but right now, the harshness of his words is probably what you needed all along. For a few minutes, you let the ambiance of the pub taper your restlessness into clarity—internalizing everything Yuta just told you the best you could.

“But…what if he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore?” you mumble. “If he really cared about me still, wouldn’t he have reached out by now?”

“That’s because men are idiots, Ice Queen. I thought you already knew that,” he points out before folding his arms across his chest. “The dumbass probably thinks he’s doing you a favor by giving you space and waiting for you to come to him when you’re ready. But his silence is pretty much doing the exact opposite, am I right?”

You nod sullenly. 

“God. I’d electrocute that fucker if only the price I had to pay wasn’t death by the gallows,” he grumbles. “Anyway, the point still stands. If he won’t come to you, then just go to Prince Charming and let him know that you’re not gonna tolerate his shit anymore.”

For a moment, you let yourself chuckle at how strongly he feels about this. “Gee, Yuta. You’re awfully supportive for someone who’s made it his life’s purpose to mess with me every chance he gets.” 

“I can be serious when I have to be,” he bites back. “Now promise me that you’ll talk to him and set things straight first thing tomorrow. You’ve made Kazuha worried enough.”

“Are you saying you’re not worried about me?” you tease.

“Watch it or I won’t show up here for another year.”

After wrapping up your conversation with Yuta, you excuse yourself for a moment to get some fresh air outside. He waves you away with a dismissive air to his posture before finishing the rest of his drink.

Then, Sungchan walks up to him with a sigh.

“You’re so weird,” he mumbles as he clears out your empty glass. “What idiot would just let the person he loves flutter off to someone else like that?”

Yuta simpers with a shake of his head, willing away the pain that lances through his chest at the verbal reminder. 

“An idiot like me, maybe.”

You’re going to talk to Joshua.

You will. You promised yourself the moment Yuta talked you into it the previous night. But it’s as if your body doesn't want to let you feel the relief of certainty just yet. 

When you wake up the following morning, your limbs feel heavier than the kegs back in the pub when they’re newly refilled. The headache you’re suffering from isn’t so different from the one you had the morning after Joshua left you all alone, but you’re fairly certain this isn’t because of a nasty hangover.

Kazuha drops by your place when you don’t show up at the pub only to see that you haven’t climbed out of bed after getting yourself a glass of water earlier in the day. She immediately realizes that you were running a high fever—one that was probably brought about by the change in seasons.

“I’m going to get you some medicine and food, okay?” she sighs, smoothing a cool washcloth across your forehead. “Is there anything else you want me to get for you outside?”

You snuggle yourself further beneath your blankets, letting your body soak in the heat as you shiver from the cold air of the room. 

Ironic how an ice elemental gets sick first thing in the winter.

“Mother’s soup…” you whisper sleepily. “That always makes me feel better.”

That’s the last thing you remember saying before drifting back into slumber.

Life at the castle has been uptight for as long as Joshua can remember.

The royal court has always been strict with upholding tradition and the ways of old. Where other children would dream about getting to grow up in the lavish halls and high ceilings of the castle, Joshua has always longed to be liberated from it. 

Time dedicated solely for leisure was scarce. He and Jeonghan were immediately taught to put their royal studies and etiquette classes first before anything else. His older brother never stood by these regulations though—always the first to rebel against the rules the elders and their parents have set. 

Joshua admired Jeonghan’s courage. Yet he knows he can never really emulate it for himself.

So he decided to be the one who follows the royal court’s every whim. The obedient prince that everyone would come to deem as perfect with how compliant he is to what everyone tells him to do. 

But then came the day when the king of Ancarra sent a present for his brother. Their parents told both of them it was a gift of goodwill, and that Jeonghan absolutely cannot refuse even if the elders of the royal court were against it. 

Jeonghan pulled him to the side once the king and queen were out of earshot—saying that the ‘gift’ is nothing but an avenue to secure his betrothal to the Ancarran princess. Joshua didn’t know what that meant at the time, being barely ten years old, but he simply went with it.

He always agrees with what he’s told after all.

To his surprise, this so-called gift is actually a puppy. 

Joshua always wanted one. A knight once told him about a loyal dog waiting for him at home, which is why he rarely took any overtime shifts at the castle. The youngest prince has wanted something to look forward to going home to ever since he heard the tale. 

As Jeonghan let his new pet explore the castle gardens, he didn’t miss the way Joshua’s eyes lingered ever-so-fondly on the small puppy. It’s for that reason that he took it upon himself to gather the hapless animal in his arms, flashing his little brother a warm smile.

“How about we take care of him together?” Jeonghan asked. “This pup is yours as much as he is mine.”

That was the first time Jeonghan saw Joshua’s eyes light up so brightly, it’s nearly blinding. And it’s also the moment he decided that he’d do virtually anything to preserve that sparkle in his little brother’s eyes.

The youngest prince did an excellent job at helping raise the puppy. It took a while for him and Jeonghan to give it a name, but it came to them one summer afternoon right after they finished giving him a bath.

“Hwan,” Jeonghan mused before laughing as the pup shook itself to dry off. “Let’s call him Hwan.”

When Joshua asked him what the name meant, Jeonghan simply patted his head—saying that he’ll know when he’s older—before continuing to towel dry their newly named pup.

Hwan brought color to their once-stale life at the castle. The servants adored him and the knights would even play with him if they ever caught sight of the little rascal bounding down the hallways. 

About two months after Hwan arrived in the castle, Joshua took him out for a quick walk all by himself. No nannies. No guards. Just him and the little pup on a leash. 

Jeonghan reassured that Joshua could do what he wanted as long as he didn’t wander off too far, and knowing that his older brother was there to cover for him made Joshua’s first real attempt at rebellion easier to execute.

The castle wasn’t located in some remote area or anything like that. Joshua quickly spotted a bunch of children his age playing amongst themselves just a short distance from the gates. 

He had intended to maintain a short distance so as to not disturb them, but when one of the kids spotted Hwan, the rest of them came flocking over like a bunch of doves. 

That’s how he ended up befriending several children that would make the royal court’s elders frown at his actions. It’s not that he’s forbidden to interact with them, but those crones always did like maintaining the class divide between nobles and commoners. 

But, having been so distracted by the game they were playing, Joshua failed to realize that Hwan was no longer tied to the tree he’d last left him in. 

The young prince frantically broke the news to the other kids, saying that Jeonghan was going to kill him if he found out he’d lost their dog. But one of them told him that a girl whose name he didn’t quite catch already went after Hwan before they could notice he was gone. 

“She chased after him in the forest I think.” 

Joshua didn’t need any further explanations. He immediately bolted to the direction of the forest without another thought. 

To his relief, it didn’t take long for him to find the person who went after Hwan in his stead. The young prince spotted you by the riverbank that bypasses a clearing in the forest—crouched low as you attempted to reach for something he couldn’t quite see.

But when Joshua shuffled just a bit closer, he realized that Hwan somehow wound up in the middle of the stream—shivering on top of a rock that didn’t hold promises of holding out for very long. 

“Come on, it’s okay,” he heard you coo. “I’ll catch you. I promise.”

 The prince couldn’t help but interfere. “H-Hey! That’s dangerous. You could fall in!”

Startled, you glance behind you with an annoyed look. “Stop shouting! The little puppy’s already scared as it is. And doesn’t he belong to you?” 

“Yes, but we can just call the knights so they can get him for us,” he reasons. “Don’t lean so close into the river! You might fall in!” 

Your lips spread into a frown. “But…he’s family, isn’t he? You can’t just leave him like that. What if he falls in the water while we waste our time calling the knights?”

He wanted to insist that, despite that being a very real possibility, it’s still much safer to call on an adult. That’s what he was taught, after all.

But Joshua was unable to find the words. Instead, he watched in complete silence as you attempted to reach Hwan without falling into the rapid stream. 

You managed to save his pup in the end—not without tumbling into the water, of course. 

The sight of you plunging into the stream once your balance was tipped made Joshua fall into a frenzied panic. He nearly ran back to the castle to call the guards for real, but you quickly broke through the surface of the water and started swimming against the current and towards the rock Hwan was shivering on.

There you were five minutes later, soaked from head to toe as you cradled the poor puppy in your arms. You were so invested in scolding Joshua for being very irresponsible with his pets that you never quite noticed the way he looked at you with adoration in his eyes.

It was the first time he’s seen someone do something so idiotic and brave and selfless with his own two eyes. 

Joshua has heard stories about warriors who fight in wars for the sake of peace. But he never would have thought that his first encounter with someone else’s bona fide bravery would be in the form of a ten year-old that wanted to save a stranger’s puppy from drowning in a river.

Then, he recalled reading about daisies in an old picture book his mother gifted. How those frail little flowers could bloom even in the bloodiest of battlefields. As you droned on and on about hammering the importance of family into his head, Joshua pictured a lone daisy in his mind’s eye. 

He wanted to give one to you. To show that he’s grateful for what you’ve done. But there weren’t any flowers blooming in this part of the forest—much less, a daisy. 

Yet, when he lifted one of his hands up, there it was.

A frail little flower for a brave little girl.

Joshua doesn’t know what to expect when he drops by the pub after almost a month of avoiding it. He knows that the chances of you having him thrown out have increased exponentially since the last time he was here, but he couldn’t take it anymore.

The night he spent at your house, doing things he never even once pictured himself doing with his ex-fiancèe, he was at cloud nine. It was the first time he’d let himself loose; selfishly thought about what he wanted at that moment with not a single thought spared for other people but you. 

Yet when the sun broke through the horizon the next day, the gravity of his carelessness dawned on him. He’d just jeopardized a friendship he’d been so careful to preserve. You were one of the very few people he could fully trust and lean on, but he decided to throw that all away for a night of debauchery.

The prince felt disgusted with himself. He didn’t deserve to see how you dozed so peacefully in the comfort of your bedroom. How you smiled in your sleep when he brushed a few strands of hair off your face. 

So instead of apologizing to you like he definitely should have…

He ran away like a coward.

Now here he is, back to the place where it all started.

He hoped to see you behind the bar like usual, mixing drinks with a hospitable smile as you entertained the evening’s patrons. But the prince is surprised to see a person he hasn’t gotten a glimpse of in a long, long while.

“You’ve got some nerve showing your face here,” Yuta snarls as he shoots Joshua down with a glare. “What do you want?”

Joshua breathes evenly through his nose and out through his mouth. 

He’s got this.

“I wanted to talk to her,” he explains simply. “Do you know where she is?”

He fully expects Yuta to not give him the answer as easily as he’d like him to. Joshua isn’t blind. He’s seen the way he looks at you. Nor is he stupid because the prince is well aware that Yuta resorts to playful banter to cover up the fact that he’s enamored by you.

Takes one to know one, he guesses.

But to Joshua’s utter surprise, the owner’s son doesn’t tell him to get lost or find someone else to bother. 

“She’s sick,” he mutters. “That one hasn’t been able to come to work since yesterday. Maybe you would’ve known that sooner if you actually gave two shits about her.”

Joshua takes all his snarky comments in stride, knowing full well that isn’t even half of what he deserves after what he did. But the fact that you’re sick rightfully concerns him. Were you alright? Did you have someone looking after you?

“Her mother’s soup.”

The prince glances at Yuta quizzically. “I’m sorry?”

It’s as though Yuta’s face has a grimace perpetually etched onto the surface, but Joshua doesn’t let it faze him. “She always asks us to bring her mother’s soup when she’s sick. If you want to make it up to her, you better do that sooner than later.” 

“Where does her mother live?” Joshua wastes no time asking. “I can go to her right away.”

An unreadable expression crosses Yuta’s face, as if assessing if Joshua’s worth telling it to after what he did to you. In the end, the owner’s son merely sighs—carding his fingers through his mussed hair.

“Follow me, Prince Charming.”

Meeting the parents is something that never really fazed Joshua before. Then again, he was already acquainted with Hyejin’s father years before he proposed to her. Meeting your parents is something that makes the prince want to jump to the bottom of an ocean, never to be seen again. 

Because how could he possibly face the people who raised you after what he did? How thick-skinned could he be to introduce himself when he chose to be a coward when he should’ve been brave?

But your mother was a dear. Your father was rightfully apprehensive of his presence, prince or not, but they both welcomed him into their home—the place where you grew up—with open arms.

“That child. She never mentioned being friends with the prince, of all people,” your mother stresses with a sigh as she prepares her signature soup. “Did you know that she’s admired you for a long time now? It’s mellowed down over the years, but she always did have a soft spot for you.”

…You’ve admired him for a long time?

Joshua has only been acquainted with you for roughly two years. Perhaps the admiration your mother speaks of is the same way citizens would admire royals who actually do their job. Given his reputation among the citizens of Seraphia, it’s no surprise to be on the receiving end of something like that.

But when she tells Joshua she wants to show him something in the garden while they wait for the soup to simmer, he’s startled by a groundbreaking revelation.

The youngest prince hasn’t used his magic in years—this much still rings true to this day. But it’s just like you’ve said: his magic is a part of him. It’s something he can’t completely erase no matter how much he tries to suppress it. 

So when Joshua sees a potted daisy sitting idly in your mother’s garden, his magic instantly reacts. 

He’s felt the pulling sensation before. After his official coronation, when he created a bouquet of roses for his mother to express his gratitude, she kept the flowers on display in the great hall of the castle. It remained there until it inevitably wilted, despite the fact that royals were heavily discouraged from using their magic. 

Joshua always felt as if the roses he fashioned with his own magic called out to him every time he passed by. As if the flowers were alive and happy to see the person who created them.

The little daisy sitting right in front of him calls out to Joshua the exact same way.

“I’m not sure if you remember, but you were the one who gave that to her,” your mother chuckles. 

What?

“This is the one I gave to her a few months ago?” he mutters. “She…kept it all this time?”

Your mother shakes her head. “No, Your Highness. That one wilted fairly quickly. This little daisy…is the flower you made and gave to my daughter when she was ten years old. It perseveres to this day because of an old friend’s preservation magic. Amazing, isn’t it?”

Preservation magic…?  

Moreover, it’s something he created with his own magic? One he apparently gifted to you when you were only ten years old?

Joshua takes a moment to jog his memory, parses through a catalog of names and faces he’s come to acquaint himself with over the years. 

Then, it hits him.

He remembers his first dog, Hwan and how he nearly lost him to a rushing river all those years ago. If it weren’t for the girl who was courageous enough to swim across the stream to save him, Joshua was certain it would’ve been the end of it. 

And that girl—the one who made him decide that he loves people who are brave; people who are selfless…

It was you.

But why haven’t you said a single word about it?

“That child… She’s much too sentimental for her own good, you know? I’m afraid that sentimentality could be a detriment to her one day, but—” your mother startles all of a sudden.  “Y-Your Highness?”

Joshua doesn’t usually cry. Hell, he doesn’t make it a habit to wear his emotions on his sleeve. As a political figure that thousands of people across the kingdom are looking up to, he’s expected to embody poise and composure at all times.

But for the first time in his life, the youngest prince lets the tears fall in front of a mother that isn’t even his own.

When you get up to answer the door, you fully expect it to be Kazuha—carrying more food than you know what to do with and another bottle of medicine even if the last one she bought is yet to run out. 

You love her, really. She’s almost like a second mother with how much she fusses over you when you’re feeling under the weather. Thanks to her tender love and care, you’re more or less feeling much better than you were yesterday. Maybe you can even show up to work by tomorrow, too.

“Zuha, you really don’t have to keep checking on me anymore. I’m al…right?”

Except it isn’t your coworker who greets you. 

It’s Joshua, looking just as handsome as the last time you saw him—if not more. But before you can question if the person in front of you is just a mirage, you notice that he’s wearing familiar looking kitchen mitts and holding an even more familiar cooking pot by the handles.

“Hello,” the prince greets sheepishly. “May I come in?”

You stare at him for a few seconds longer, wondering why on earth he has your mother’s kitchen paraphernalia before cracking the door open wider. 

When have you ever said no to Joshua?

An air of awkwardness hangs above you like clouds over your heads as Joshua serves you some of your mother’s beloved soup. You insisted that you were well enough to do it yourself, but the prince was having none of it—making you sit down on the dining table as he concentrated on not having anything spill off the ladle as he transferred the soup into a bowl.

He somehow manages to mess even that up though, splashing a few drops all over the polished wood with a silent curse. You can’t help but stifle a laugh. This is a man who obviously hasn’t served other people in ways outside of his duties as a royal prince.

But then you suddenly remember how you felt when you woke up that day—nothing but empty sheets and a heavy heart to keep you company.

“Why are you here?”

The words come out so quietly, you doubt Joshua would’ve heard them if it wasn’t so quiet inside your house. But his eyes slowly rise to meet yours before he walks over to you and places a bowl of warm soup in front of you on the table.

Then, Joshua flashes you a shy smile. “Let’s…talk for a while, yes?” 

Both of you help yourselves to generous servings of your mother’s cooking for a while. The rich flavor easily reinvigorates you more than you thought it would, and you find yourself even slightly missing home again. Maybe you should pay your parents a much-needed visit.

“So…how have you been?” 

Right. You still have much to discuss with the prince himself.

“Do you want the answer I tell everyone else or the actual answer?” you muse, quoting something similar he asked you a while ago. From the way the tips of Joshua’s ears redden at your words, he recalls them just as vividly.

He scoops another spoonful of soup into his mouth before letting out a quiet sigh. “The actual answer.”

You manage a tight-lipped smile. “Miserable then.”

Joshua nods once, the grip he has on his borrowed spoon tightening ever-so slightly. He opens his mouth a few times, as if wanting to say something but being unable to form the words. 

“How about you, Your Highness?” you ask. “How have you been?”

He frowns. “You…you don’t have to keep calling me that.”

“Why?” Cocking an eyebrow, you help yourself to more of your mother’s soup without breaking eye contact. “You’re the prince and I’m just some commoner you got tired of playing with. It would be improper for me to address you as anything else.”

You know you’re speaking somewhat out of turn. It’s obvious that he paid you a visit in the same house he left you in to make amends, but you were sick of playing the understanding, lovesick fool. Pricks of anger start to dot your chest the longer you think about that day, and suddenly Yuta’s suggestion sounds so much more appealing.

All these months Joshua spent stringing you along with your heart in the palm of his hand, only for him to leave it for dead…

You were done taking his shit.

“I know that a million apologies won’t make up for what I did, but I’ll try anyway,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for just leaving without an explanation. Waking up next to you was easily the happiest moment of my life and I’d want nothing more than to experience it again. I…didn’t know what came over me.”

You let out a mirthless chuckle. “You’re lucky that you saw me first thing in the morning, that you had the happiest moment in your life. When I woke up it felt like I never even mattered to you.”

Your heart feels like it’s on the verge of exploding with how much emotions courses through it in a single second. Joshua remains rightfully silent, head lowered as he takes in your words. 

So you decide to say even more.

“Not that I expect you to remember, but I’ve loved you since we were children. I was perfectly fine with the fact that you’ll never love me back—even when we became friends, even when you caved that evening and kissed me.” 

You pause for a moment, letting yourself breathe despite your throat starting to constrict with each passing second. The feeling of your magic creeping up in chilly dregs across your fingertips doesn’t make the entire ordeal any easier.

“I was going to let the fact that you just left like that slide because I was so convinced that you’d come around the next day to give me an explanation. That you’d at least give me some clarity because I deserve that in the least, don’t I?

“But you didn’t. You never told me why you suddenly thought I wasn’t worth clearing things up with. And now you’re here, saying that waking up next to me was the happiest moment of your life? Don’t you think you’ve already hurt me enough?”

“Because I was afraid,” Joshua interjects, much louder than you expected. “All my life, I’ve done what everyone tells me to do because I’m the perfect prince, the obedient one, the only one they can control.”

You grimace. “How is that my problem—”

“It isn’t. It never was and it never will be your problem. It shouldn’t have to be…” He sighs, dragging a palm over his face as he stares up at the ceiling. “You deserve someone who loves you without fear, without reservations. Someone who wakes up next to you everyday and won’t bolt right out of the door because he suddenly remembered he’s the prince of the kingdom.

“I want…so badly to be that person for you. But that morning, I stared at the person who’s the embodiment of everything I shouldn’t want.”

You bark out a harsh-sounding laugh. “Someone you shouldn’t want? Because I’m a commoner? In case you’re forgetting, only a year ago, you were supposed to marry a commoner, too. Why is it that when it comes to me, you suddenly don’t want to take that risk? Why do you have to continue lying to my face when you can just tell me outright that you don’t fucking love me—”

“I’ve loved you more in the past few months than I ever loved Hyejin in the entire decade I’ve known her,” Joshua rasps and you don’t miss the way his voice nearly cracks. “It fucking scares me because I’ve never loved someone this deeply. Never wanted something for myself as much as I want you. 

“I love you so much that I was ready to give everything up. Becoming king and helping others just like I dreamed—all of that didn’t matter that morning. When I realized just how tight of a hold you actually have on me, I was fucking terrified.”

For the first time tonight, you’re at a loss for words. You stare at Joshua with trembling lips, wondering a million times if you heard him right.

He…loves you?

“Ironic how the girl who taught me what bravery looks like when we were children is the same one I was too much of a coward to face when I realized how I felt about her.”

Wait a minute—

“What do you mean?” you whisper incredulously.

Joshua breathes in sharply before the tension in his shoulders visibly ebbs away. He fishes something out of his pocket for a few seconds…

Only to show you the small, frail daisy being kept alive with preservation magic.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” he murmurs, twisting the stem in his fingers. “If I’d known you were the one who saved Hwan back then—”

“What, you would’ve let yourself love me sooner?” you ask sharply. “Well, I’ll have you know Your Highness, that I didn’t want to come off as some gold-digging fiend who throws herself at you. Nor do I want you to love me because you think of me as some sort of symbol for bravery or whatever bullshit noble reasoning you’ve got going for yourself.

“I wanted you to love me as I am now. Is that so hard to understand?”

You don’t tell him that you were just as cowardly as he was. That you’ve been sticking by your mother’s words since she imparted them. 

You and him are on opposite ends. 

Joshua is a prince and you’re nothing but a lowly bartender. That’s the thought that helped keep your love for him at bay for the longest time. 

But what do you do when the same prince who was always out of reach lays all his feelings bare? What do you do when you find out that he isn’t completely unreachable after all?

The room remains painfully silent for about three stuttering heartbeats before Joshua lays the daisy that started everything next to his bowl of cold soup. The prince gets up from his seat and you watch in rapt attention as he goes down on one knee. 

“What are you…?”

Before you can even complete that sentence, Joshua does something he hasn’t in years. 

You don’t think you can forget how he conjured a bouquet of roses for the queen during his coronation. That was the second and last time you’ve ever seen him use his magic. 

Yet now, the youngest prince is weaving the most beautiful bunch of daisies out of thin air. The blossoms look even more vibrant than the bouquet he’d purchased for you at Wonwoo’s. You don’t even realize you were holding your breath until Joshua pushes the flowers closer to your face and takes your hand in his.

You hate how he’s able to bring warmth to your cold, cold hands even after everything. 

“I know we got off on a very, very rough start, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness just yet but…” He breathes and it’s the first time you’ve ever heard him so nervous. “Can we try this again? Not as the girl who saved Hwan and as the prince you’ve loved for years, but just as you and me in the present.”

“No.”

Joshua blinks. “S-Sorry?”

“I said no, Joshua,” you huff, crossing your arms together as you push away his flowers. “You think I’m going to make things easy for you after what you did? I might be catastrophically in love with you, but I’m done being a fool. You have to earn my forgiveness first before I let you—mmph!”

You’re too slow to stop him when Joshua tosses the flowers on the table and lunges in for a kiss. 

“Y-You idiotic prince,” you gasp into his mouth, glaring straight into his honeyed eyes. “Kissing me without my consent isn’t going to make me forgive you any faster!”

“You called me Joshua.” He grins, and if that isn’t the most gorgeous smile you’ve ever seen, you don’t know what is. “You never call me by my name.”

Joshua pulls you in for another. And another. And another. You don’t have it in you to resist him and keep up the vengeful façade when the love of your life has finally deigned to return your feelings for him.

Maybe you’ll just punish him some other time.

For now, you let yourself bask in this small bubble of genuine happiness. 

“An Oak Walker, please. I heard that the king himself considers that as his favorite.”

You let out a quiet laugh as you list down the pub’s most recent order. “I wouldn’t say it’s his favorite—”

“Oh, it definitely is.”

At the sound of your husband’s rebuttal, you find yourself rolling your eyes. Joshua brings out a glass from the shelves before filling both of them with a fresh batch of whiskey straight from the kegs. The idiotic prince doesn’t even flinch when you glare at him.

The customer you’re serving—an Ancarran diplomat named Soonyoung—cackles in his seat. He’s a face you’re starting to see more frequently around the pub, and Joshua told you beforehand that it’s because he’s the new queen’s closest friend. The man spends a lot more time bar-hopping in the capital of Seraphia than actually doing his job in his own homeland.

“Always a treat to see the king’s little brother being a menace to his wife,” Soonyoung comments as Joshua serves him his drink. “No wonder I haven’t seen you around the castle much. You’re too busy pushing her buttons, aren’t you?”

“Hmm, not really. That’s the owner’s job,” Joshua replies with a smile. “I only like to tease her from time to time.”

“Why are we suddenly talking about the owner?”

As if on cue, Yuta eases himself into the conversation with one brow raised. It’s always surreal to think about how he took up the title of the pub’s owner after their father’s passing. But it’s still nice to have one of your dear friends around even after so many years.

It’s been roughly six years since your marriage with Joshua. Lots of things have changed since then, but there are others that remained the same.

For one, Kazuha is no longer part of the bar’s regular employee roster. Right after graduating from the Academy, she was immediately scouted to be a Stormwatcher by the royal family itself. She spends much of her time in the castle, studying various weather patterns prevalent in the kingdom and other neighboring lands, but she still visits from time to time.

Seokmin and Jihoon still hold the occasional performance at the pub whenever they’re in the city, but they’ve long decided to join a traveling group of musicians to spread their songs to places other than Seraphia. No matter how long they’re gone for though, you always make sure to reserve at least two glasses in case they come by.

Speaking of singers, Sungchan and Shotaro have been promoted from the pub’s usual waiters to regular performers. Both of them turned out to have hidden talents for singing, and your patrons were more than happy to enjoy the shows they put on every night. 

Wonwoo, your ever-present childhood friend has decided to hire more staff to manage the store before enrolling back into the Academy again. He’s always had the same kind of magic as his mother and he told you that he wanted to invest some time into cultivating it just as she had when she was still alive. Of course, you were supportive of the decision—promising that you’ll still buy flowers from his shop even if your husband can make an entire garden for you with a snap of his fingers.

Much more recently, Jeonghan has taken up the title of Seraphia’s seventeenth king and ended up marrying his not-so-childhood sweetheart. Both his coronation and marriage were an even bigger mess than what you and Joshua had to go through, and both you and your husband don’t particularly like dwelling on it very much.

As for the things that aren’t all that different…

You take the time to quietly watch Joshua as he tells Yuta about a child that burst into the pub earlier—a child that has Yuta’s scowling face and potent lightning magic. Your friend shakes his head, wondering how long his wife is going to scold him for bringing their son to work again. 

Yuta still calls you Ice Queen sometimes. Joshua is still very much a prince of Seraphia. 

And you’re…still you.

“You have a letter again.”

Joshua glances at you from the front door of your shared home as he hangs his coat on the rack. You were in the middle of sorting the mail you’ve received today and saw that one of them is addressed to Joshua. 

Even without a return address, you’ve been with your husband long enough to know it was from his ex-fiancée. 

As the two of you prepare for bed, Joshua quietly reads over Hyejin’s letter with a fond look in his eyes. You try your best not to feel envious because he’s your husband, for gods’ sake. What’s more is that Hyejin is already with Chan. Neither of you know where they went after the two of them ran away from Seraphia, but Joshua still feels responsible for covering their tracks so no one could ever hope to disturb them.

He’s always been caring for others, after all.

“What’s wrong, snowflake?”

Joshua asks the question when you’re both already under the covers. When you first got together, he opted to call you snowflake instead of Ice Queen—saying that he wants to address his lover in a less demeaning way. You thought it to be ridiculous at first, but now you can’t help but melt at the endearment.

When you don’t respond, he sighs, taking your cold hands in his own. Curse this man. He knows you too well.

“Are you bothered by Hyejin’s letter?” he murmurs, kissing your knuckles tenderly. 

“Just a little,” you answer honestly. “I’m sorry. It’s stupid, I know—”

“It’s not stupid. Don’t dismiss your own feelings so quickly like that.” Joshua pouts. “Does my wife need me to remind her that she’s the one I married in front of thousands of people six years ago? The one who screams my name in our bed every night?”

Scandalized, you smack him in the chest. “I do not scream your name! I have more courtesy for our neighbors than you might think.”

Your husband nods as if merely playing along, shoving the covers off your form before nuzzling the crook of your neck. “Yes, yes, of course. But you can’t deny that you moan it so prettily every time we lie together like this.”

Gods… Was he this infuriating when your love was still one-sided?

He strips you down like he’s already done countless times before. The two of you are bare in no time—clothes strewn all over the floor as your husband lowers himself on the bed and hooks your legs across his shoulders.

Husband. 

It’s so surreal that the idiot who left you all alone that fateful morning several years ago is the same man who’s made you the happiest wife for the past six years. 

“My, you’re much wetter than I thought you’d be,” Joshua teases with a breathy laugh, tracing your glistening slit with one of his long, thick fingers. “Here I thought you’d kick me out of the bedroom for trying something when you were in the middle of sulking.”

“I wasn’t sulking.” 

“Sure you weren’t, snowflake.”

Then, his mouth was on you—making you forget about letters from past lovers and everything else in between. 

Joshua tugs your thighs even closer as he feasts on your cunt, lathering his tongue in your essence before licking a long stripe across your seam. You let out a breathless whimper, hands immediately tangling themselves in his hair. You can feel him smirk against your sex but before you can make any side remarks about his cocky attitude, Joshua seals his lips over your clit and sucks on the sensitive nub. The effect it has on you is immediate—hips thrashing around as your husband relentlessly continues his ministrations. 

“S-Shua,” you sigh, toes curling as a steady stream of pleasure continues to pulse into your core. “So good… Your mouth feels so good.” 

He hums appreciatively before switching things up a little. You whimper in protest when his lips part from your clit, but he easily makes up for it by licking across your wet cunt in quick, repetitive succession. Your devil of a husband couples the amazing sensation with his fingers, quickly sliding in two of his digits because he knows you can take anything he gives you. 

“Such a good little wife for me,” he chuckles as he buries them to the knuckles, delighting in the way you purr out his name again when he curls them just so. “I’ve done a tacky job at reminding you how much I love you these days, haven’t I? Can’t have you getting jealous over a bunch of letters when I should just make you come like this, hm?”

You can’t even process what he’s saying right now—too focused on pinpointing the release he’s slowly but surely building up. 

Joshua continues murmuring a string of praises along your inner thighs, making sure to leave his mark across your skin. His love bites bloom like violets across your flesh and before you can let yourself revel in the sentiment of it all, he’s back to assaulting your quivering cunt with his sinful mouth.

“Joshua, please,” you cry out as he amps up the speed of his thrusts. “W-Want more.”

Your husband hums again but doesn’t have the heart to part with your delicious cunt, pulling his complete focus on your clit as he slides in a third finger. The stretch isn’t unfamiliar, but it burns a little. Overall, the sensation simply adds on to the growing fire inside your belly.

When your orgasm crests, you have to muffle an undignified moan with your hands—letting yourself ride it out as Joshua continues licking and slurping at your juices like a man starved.

You take a while to get your wits about you again, a breathless mess on the mattress as your husband pulls himself back up. When your brain is finally there again, the first thing you notice is how Joshua’s rock hard cock strains against his chiseled stomach.

“Always taste so fucking good, snowflake,” he chuckles, grabbing your chin with the fingers that were just inside you. “I could live off eating you up like this for the rest of my life.”

“You’re being ridiculous again,” you mutter shyly, warmth blooming across your cheeks.

Joshua laughs again and it’s such a beautiful sound, your heart flutters when it hits your ears. He gently presses his lips onto yours, letting you taste the tangy flavor of your release before sliding his tongue into your mouth. 

You’ll never get tired of kissing Joshua. It felt so inexplicably good to kiss him the first time in that lone alley, but every single one you shared after you can finally call him yours felt twice as better, and several times sweeter. 

“I love you,” he murmurs. “I’ll never regret choosing to spend the rest of my life with you.”

You chuckle, pressing your forehead against his. “Even if I refused to assimilate into the royal family? That’s the main reason why you couldn’t be king, right?”

Joshua simpers. “To hell with being king. The crown has always been Jeonghan’s to begin with. And I’d much rather spend my time pleasuring you like this than shoulder the biggest responsibility in the kingdom.”

“Mhmm. You chose right then.”

Your husband is mildly startled when you maneuver around to push him back on the bed. But Joshua doesn’t seem to have any plans to voice out his complaints when you prop yourself between his thighs—taking his hard, leaking cock in your small hand and giving it a few experimental pumps.

“Fuck. You look so good, darling,” he moans. “I won’t ever get tired of seeing you like this.”

You shake your head incredulously, a traitorous smile finding its way on your face. “Always such a sweet-talker. Pray tell, do you take eloquence classes as part of your upbringing as a prince? You never seem to run out of smooth things to say.”

“Well, we do have something similar to—”

Joshua’s words abruptly morph into a choked out sound when you take him into your mouth, letting your tongue slide across the vein jutting around his length. Your husband watches ravenously as you take him to the hilt—not once choking on his size with how many times you’ve already done this prior.

Despite how gentlemanly he is on the outside, you know Joshua likes his head sloppy. So you make sure to lather enough saliva around his cock as you bob your head up and down, wrapping your fist around the parts you can’t quite reach. The sinful sound of your lips working on his throbbing length is nearly enough to drive him to the pinnacle, but Joshua does his best to hold out for as long as he can.

When you feel his fingers in your hair, you let him push your head into his navel—delighting in the deep moan he lets out when he feels your throat constricting around the head of his cock.

“Pretty woman with a pretty mouth,” Joshua sighs pathetically as you look up at him with teary eyes. “But as much as I’d love to come down your throat and make you swallow it all…”

You let out a tiny squeak when Joshua lifts you off his cock and back onto the mattress. 

“I want you to take all of my seed in this sweet cunt of yours instead,” he chuckles evilly, lining his cock up against stomach as if measuring just how deeply he’ll penetrate you. 

The thought has you mewling with need.

“Joshua,” you mewl, lacing your fingers around his neck to pepper his face with quick, desperate kisses. “I need you inside me. All of you.”

“Yeah? You’ll let me come in this tight cunt?” he growls as he slides the head of his cock along your ruined slit. “Fuck you dumb and fill you up with my come? We can do it all over again once you’re dripping with me, you know? Just so we’re sure that my seed will take.” 

“Yes,” you moan aloud as he finally slides into you. “Want your come. Want your children, Shua.”

Just as he’s buried himself to the hilt, Joshua pauses to stare at you with a look of disbelief. You don’t really blame him.

Though you’ve been married for quite some time now, the topic of starting a family hasn’t really crossed your minds yet. Joshua wanted to spend as much time as he could showing just how much he loves his wife. But discussions about having a child or two have come up every now and again—though most of it was in half-jest. 

Now, though, you’re completely certain. 

“Did you not hear me, dear husband?” you laugh, despite the way your walls clench around his hot length. “I want your children. How can you give me that when you’re busy gawking at me like you are now?”

Joshua doesn’t need to be told twice.

He quickly throws your legs over his shoulders, introducing an angle so delicious, it makes your eyes roll to the back of your head even when he has yet to move. Joshua breathes out a strained groan at the sight of you—hair fanning against the pillows with a wanton look in your eyes. 

How could he not fuck you until you’re with child?

The first snap of his hips is brutal. It sends you forward on the bed and you feel every inch of him bypassing the tight ring of your hole. Your cunt squelches with every thrust, rendering you a panting mess beneath your husband of six years and hopefully more. Joshua leans down to pepper your chest with the same love bites he’s left between your thighs and you think fondly of the fact that your husband can still conjure flowers of his own without using his own magic.

“My gorgeous. Fucking. Wife,” he growls as he takes a handful of your breasts in his large, warm hands. “I’ve waited for so long for you to tell me you’re ready. Waited so long to fuck my seed so deep into you, you’ll be feeling me for days. You want to help me sire a bunch of little royals now? Let the entire kingdom know you’re mine?”

“I-I’ve—” You gasp when he grazes against that patch of spongy flesh inside you that makes you see stars. “I’ve always been yours, Shua. Always.”

Your husband smiles against your skin before pressing a long kiss on your lips. When you dare to look in his deep brown eyes again, you nearly lose yourself in the love reflected back.

“That’s right, snowflake,” Joshua sighs. “Mine to breed. Mine to fuck.”

“Mine to love.”

His tender words are your last straw. You spiral from the edge again as stars burst in the back of your eyelids, letting the rush of pleasure surge through your system as Joshua continues fucking himself into completion. Your husband is murmuring a string of sweet nothings as he chases after his own high, but you’re much too lightheaded to make sense of the words.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” you babble senselessly as his cock hits the deepest parts of you. “I’ll never want anyone else but you, Shua.”

“So will I, love,” he confesses as his hips snap into a stuttering halt. You let out another broken moan when you feel his thick, hot emission paint your trembling walls in the white of his release—feeling so blissful, you nearly forget your own name.

“So will I.”

Joshua doesn’t stop there. Even when he knows you might need a minute to recover, he flips you over on the mattress, pulls your ass up in the air and continues fucking his spend even deeper inside you. Though you want to croak out in protest, you’re much too delirious with pleasure to voice it out. 

“Need to make sure my seed takes, right, darling?” he breathes out as he smooths his large palms across the swell of your ass. “I can’t wait to see you heavy with my child. Don’t you ever think you’ll become any less beautiful than you are now when that does happen. Because I’ll continue reminding you just how unbelievably gorgeous you are.”

You want that too. More than anything you’ve ever wanted in your life.

It takes several more rounds for you to sate your primal need for each other. Joshua collapses into a heap right next to you on the bed and you try not to laugh—convinced that doing so would make his come trickle out of your poor, abused cunt.

“Hello,” your husband murmurs once he’s caught his breath. 

You giggle. “Hi.”

As he engulfs you in the endless heat of his embrace, your eyes catch on the collection of beautiful daisies on your nightstand. It’s the very same bouquet Joshua had given to you the night he came to apologize for his mistakes—enduring the passage of time with Wonwoo’s freshly honed preservation magic.

The cold of winter outside continues to seep into the room even when Joshua has already dozed off by your side. You glance at him lovingly, remembering him say that he’s grown to hate the season when Hyejin broke off their engagement in the middle of the snow.

But both of you are at that point in your lives where you don’t need to bury yourself in a mountain of blankets nor do you need to toss too much wood into the hearth. As long as Joshua remains by your side, you’ll always be warm.

⟢ end notes: i hope to god that tumblr won't crash when someone reblogs this monster lmfao. thank you for making it til the end! heads up that i might take a break from this series for a while bc writing this expended so many of my brain cells, i just have to step away for a while. i hope you'll still be looking forward for the third and final installment of the series hehe jeonghan's going to be getting his own spotlight very soon~

this is part of the it’s complicated series.

---

hi beloved. i am here to bother you with the idea of cucking shua by fucking jeonghan in front of him and blindfolding him so he cant watch he can only listen to ur moans and get off to the thought of his best friend fucking the life out of you and he cant even see

03:05 — JH & JS

i was supposed to go to bed but then i remembered this ask exists and now i won't do that anymore 🗿

warnings: cuckolding, smut (MINORS DNI)

you love your boyfriend. you love him more than anything in the entire goddamn world. so when joshua lets slip that he wouldn't mind seeing you get fucked by his best friend during a silly game of truth or dare at a night out with friends, who are you to deny him what he wants?

unfortunately for your sweet, sweet shua, jeonghan plays out the fantasy in a much more sinister way.

"hear that, joshuji?" he chuckles and you feel every word breathed against the sensitive skin of your neck. "she's soaking. all wet and ready for a cock that isn't yours. how's that make you feel?"

the words are delivered in a tone that isn't so different from a stereotypical villain that's out to take everything away from the main protagonist. but if there's something you know about the nature of your boyfriend's long-time friendship with jeonghan, it's that they bond over the most unorthodox things.

one being: jeonghan being balls deep inside you while joshua sits helplessly on the plush reading chair near the bed — wrists tied together behind his back while a silk black blindfold robs him of his sight all at once.

"can hear her pretty cunt all the way here," he sighs almost dreamily — what a freak, but you adore him for it anyway. "jeonghan-ah, you better fuck her right. nice and sloppy so i can at least hear what you're doing to my girlfriend."

joshua sounds so awfully casual about the entire thing that it makes you wonder if this odd pair has done this before. you wouldn't really put it past them to be insane enough to do that, but whatever girls they tag-teamed before don't matter.

it's your pussy that they want now.

"h-hannie," you whimper, hips gyrating ever-so slightly to give yourself the friction you craved like a drug. "need you to move."

jeonghan lets slip an amused laugh, pulling his hips back only to force you back onto the mattress with a powerful thrust. you mewl at the sensation, loving the way his cock drags against your velvet heat — the way your insides squelch with his intrusion. he feels so much different from joshua and you find yourself wondering if it makes you such a terrible person to enjoy getting fucked stupid on another man's cock.

"both of you are perfect for each other — so fucking demanding," jeonghan comments. "don't worry, shua. i'll rail our sweet baby so good, she'll keep coming back for more."

as promised, jeonghan makes it sloppy. spit dribbling from his puckered lips and onto the spot where his length disappears inside of you. he fucks the stringy liquid into your tight cunt — making the slide easy and smooth and so fucking divine that you're moaning into the sheets in no time.

jeonghan's heavy balls slap against your thighs with every forward thrust — unrelenting with his vigor as his teeth find purchase on the shell of your ear. "so fuckin' cockhungry, aren't you? couldn't be content with shua's? had to let me fuck this tight little pussy to keep you satisfied?"

he says the words sharply — like a knife to the ribcage before he twists the proverbial handle. but all they do is send another rush of slick gushing out of your hole, soaking jeonghan's cock even more as your eyes flutter open to let your gaze land on joshua.

he isn't putting much of a fight, but you see the way his thighs clench with the itch to get up and stuff you full alongside his best friend. the erection straining against his sweats makes your mouth water, wanting nothing more than to take his heavy length into your mouth as jeonghan fucks you from behind.

"tightest fucking pussy i've ever had," jeonghan hisses as he smooths his hands over your ass — squeezing your perky flesh hard enough to leave angry red marks. you arch your back in pure ecstasy. "you're so unfair, joshuji. keeping such a slutty cunt all to yourself when we could've been filling her up together."

joshua lets out a shaky laugh, bottom lip wedged between his teeth with a no-good smile. "i'll give you a call when she's in the mood to get stuffed by two cocks."

"fuck— she got tighter," jeonghan groans before rolling his hips deep enough to make your eyes roll to the back of your skull. "you like the sound of that, don't you? both your holes filled with cock? or do you want me and shua inside this tight pussy at the same time? you can take it, right?"

"wan' it so bad," you practically sob into the sheets as jeonghan fucks you harder, faster. "need your cum in me, hannie. please, please, please —"

"fuck, you sound so desperate, baby," joshua moans from his spot in the corner, hips bucking ever-so slightly. "begging so fucking prettily for jeonghan's load. shit. i might just come untouched."

the older man simpers, reaching between your thighs to find that sensitive little nub with unrelenting strokes. "you hear that, sweet thing? your pathetic little boyfriend is gonna cream himself to the sound of you begging for my cum. go ahead, baby. come around my cock so i can stuff you full."

his filthy words coupled with the quick, precise circles he's tracing around your clit makes your walls clamp down on him tightly — milking jeonghan's cock as you muffle a long-winded moan into the sheets.

"that's our girl — our cock drunk princess," jeonghan hisses before slamming his hips against your ass one last time, dumping his white hot cum into your hole until it overflows.

it takes you a while to come down from sheer bliss — so disoriented from that mind-shattering orgasm that you belatedly realize that joshua is right in front of you. blindfold missing, restraints undone.

before you can even ask what's going on, your boyfriend is already taking out his rock hard length out of his soiled sweats — all while his best friend's cock keeps his own cum from leaking out of your sloppy hole.

jeonghan smirks.

"your boyfriend deserves some attention too, right baby?"

---

Raise a Little Hell

SUMMARY: It's your first Halloween with Joshua and his friends, and you're more than excited to win their famous costume contest. Just when you think you're bound for the trophy, the secret your boyfriend has been keeping dashes your hopes. PAIRING: Incubus!Joshua Hong x afab!reader GENRE: fluff, suggestive, crack AU/TROPE: demon au, halloween party WORD COUNT: 2.4k WARNINGS: implied alcohol use, not beta read RATING: PG A/N: AHHHHH HE'S FINALLY HERE!! I wanted to post this on Halloween, but alas. It was not finished. This is my contribution to my Evil Twins Halloween collab with @justhere4kpop, who also made me this really pretty banner so we could twin!! Go check out their companion fic, "Oh, Nurse!!" featuring Jeonghan here. There will be two more installments to this universe; Fall from Grace, the smut scene I omitted from this one, and Silk & Spice, a filthy prequel featuring both of the evil twins in all their demonic glory. divs, as usual, from the lovely @cafekitsune masterlist | join my taglist | buy me a coffee?

“You’re leaving in thirty minutes and you’re not even dressed yet.”

Joshua chuckled quietly, smoothing invisible wrinkles in his jacket before meeting Jeonghan’s gaze in the mirror. “I am dressed, actually. I’m a devil.” He smirked, letting his eyes settle into their natural red.

“Every day of your miserable, eternal existence, sure,” the elder hummed, shoving his hands in the pockets of his white lab coat. He’d gone as a doctor for reasons none of the boys could comprehend, and he was judging Joshua?

“It’s not like you didn’t take most of your costume out of your closet, too,” Joshua sighed, turning to level his brother-in-arms with a playful glare. “And I think I look dashing, thank you very much.”

“Look dashing another night. I thought you wanted to win the costume contest, and you’re not going to do that without a costume.” Sighing, the younger shoved his hands in his pockets, watching the gears turn in Jeonghan’s head. He blinked hard when they clicked together, huffing a disbelieving laugh. “You’re serious.”

“Yes, I’m serious! Y/N wanted to do a couples costume, an angel and a devil, and… I figured, as cliche as it is, it might make telling them easier.” His gaze flickered down as he gnawed at his lip, wincing as his fang pierced the inside of it. “This way they can see I’m not lying.”

His friend flashed him a wary look, but nodded. “Be careful. You know the rules.”

Joshua’s expression steeled and he gave a single, curt nod. “She’ll know before she enters the house.”

A knock at the door of your apartment startled you, and you cursed quietly as you glimpsed the time. You knew you had been running late today, but you hadn’t realized just how late. Now, here you were, makeup only half applied and your dear, sweet boyfriend waiting patiently in the hall. Setting down your brush, you hurried to the door, giving Joshua a sheepish smile as you peered around it. 

“I’m not quite ready yet, but—” you began, tongue twisting into knots as you caught the heated stare Joshua was giving you. His eyes raked over the near indecent dress hugging your figure, lingering on the curve of your cleavage and appreciating the innocent, glowy look your half-done makeup provided. He ran his tongue over his teeth hungrily as his ruby gaze fixed on your own, stepping into the space properly.

“That’s fine, I think they can wait on us,” he purred, crowding into your space to place his hands on your hips. You could have sworn, between the lust in his gaze and the abnormal red of his irises, that his eyes glowed. “Just for a little bit. I don’t mind missing the costume contest if you don’t.”

You breathed a laugh, reaching up to cup his cheek as you rolled your lip between your teeth. “I think you put too much work into this for us to miss it, honestly,” you hummed, stepping out of his embrace to drink him in. He started to protest, his grip tightening on your hips, but you gave him a firm shove back, humming appreciatively. “When did you have time to do all of this?” you questioned, reaching up for the horns perched atop his head.

Much to your surprise, he ducked away from your touch, gently catching your wrist as a flush color his cheeks. “I, uh… A couple of late nights, y’know?”

You frowned for only a moment before movement caught your eye, and Joshua cursed internally as you zeroed in on the tail behind him. Your furrowed brows shot up to your hairline, a grin taking over your features as you squealed in delight. Every spare shred of his attention went toward keeping the accursed appendage from twitching as you shuffled around him and cupped it in your palms. He sank his fangs into his bottom lip as your fingers wandered over it, tracing down the red gradient to the rounded little spade and back up to where it began to match his skin, finally disappearing under his clothes. By the time you pulled back, he had drawn blood, but he forced a smile onto his lips. 

“Shua!” You beamed, and his heart swelled as you jumped up to wrap your arms around his neck. Sighing, he wrapped his arms around your middle, tucking his nose into your hair to breathe you in. “I know you weren’t too excited about this,” you muttered, “but thank you for taking it seriously for me. I can’t imagine how long this all took.” 

“Years,” he huffed, chuckling at his own joke. If only you knew.

You stepped back to look at him once more, giggling with him. “I’m sure it felt like it. Now come on, I have to finish my makeup and we have to get there so we can win this thing and beat Jeonghan!” 

He opened his mouth to stop you, but before he could, you dashed off toward your bedroom. Joshua sighed. He’d tell you on the way—he knew better than to interrupt your makeup time.

In general, Joshua Hong was one of the most laid-back people you’d met. He stressed himself out as much as any other college-aged guy, but that was insight only you and his closest friends held. He was an expert at keeping his emotions to himself, sometimes keeping even you from knowing how he felt. It made the way he was positively radiating nervous energy that much more noticeable. His fingers tapped out an absent-minded rhythm against the steering wheel, one small muscle in his jaw twitching as his eyes scanned the road, seemingly avoiding you. You frowned, picking at the feathers on the wings laying in your lap. 

“Shua?” you called into the silence, and you swore you saw him jump, the tail twitching with the movement. He hummed acknowledgement, eyes still locked onto the road as you turned into a neighborhood. “Are you okay? You seem… Tense.” 

“No, baby, I’m fine,” he replied quickly, the smile he flashed you not quite reaching his eyes. 

You frowned, your own gaze shifting to the streets rolling by. “If you don’t want to tell me what it is, that’s okay, but don’t tell me you’re fine when you’re clearly not, Joshua,” you snapped. 

Once again, he startled, bile rising in his throat. Heaving a sigh, he pulled up to the curb in front of his friends’ house. “It’s not that simple, baby.”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you moved to get out of the car. “I know you’re anxious about me meeting your friends, or whatever, but this is so unlike you. If you were this worried about it, you didn’t have to—”

“Y/N,” he sighed, running a hand over his face while the other reached for you, grabbing your wrist and successfully halting your escape. “It’s… I have to tell you something, before we go in. And it’s kind of both life and relationship changing, so… Forgive me for being nervous.” 

His gaze dropped to his lap, hands fiddling with the hem of his jacket as you settled back in your seat, eyes fixed on him. The look on his face made your heart ache, anxiety creasing his brow as he gnawed at his lip. Reaching a hand out, you settled it on his thigh. And this time, when the tail behind him twitched with your touch, your heart jumped into your throat. 

Your boyfriend seemed to realize immediately, wide eyes darting over his shoulder to where you were staring. His heart was pounding a mile a minute in his chest, throat tight with anxiety as seconds stretched like hours, and when the words finally left him, it was all at once.

“I’mademon.”

You blinked, slowly, pulling your hand back and tilting your head curiously. “I’m sorry… Slower?”

“I’m… I’m a demon. Like, from hell. The costume isn’t actually a costume. It’s just… Me.” He continued to avoid your gaze, tail flickering anxiously behind him. “I thought that the whole angel-devil thing would make it easier to tell you, because you can see that it’s all attached, but then you got all excited about me taking this seriously and that on top of the fact that ‘we’re demons’ is a lot to handle, I… It just made me more anxious.”

You blinked, processing his words silently. He was practically writhing in his seat, and if this weren’t his car, you’d be afraid he would bolt. Hell, maybe he still would. 

Your brow furrowed as you mulled over his words. “Wait. We?”

Much to your surprise, he chuckled, and you watched the tension drain from his shoulders. “I tell you I’m a demon, and the we in that rambling is what you latch onto?”

“I mean… You’re still my Joshie, right?” you murmured, once again tugging at the pile of feathers in your lap. “You’re not going out and killing people or stealing their souls at night or stealing children, are you?”

Joshua laughed, reaching across to still your nervous hands. “No, baby, nothing like that. I’m still the same old Joshua I’ve always been. The only thing that changes is my appearance.”

“Okay,” you nodded, giving him a reassuring smile. “Then this changes nothing. Except, now, you can be yourself around me.” 

He grinned, eyes creasing into crescents as he pulled your hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. “I love you, angel.”

His preferred nickname for you always sent heat rushing through your veins, but with this added context, it was all you could do to suppress a shudder as warmth pooled in your belly. “I love you too, Shua.” 

“I, uh… There’s a reason I told you tonight. We… kind of have our Halloween parties in Hell.”

“Look at you, Y/N!” Seungkwan beamed as he greeted you, pulling you in for a quick hug. You giggled as he pulled back, spinning slowly to give your friend a full view of your angel costume, fluffy wings now looped over your shoulders. “Cute.” His eyes flicked to Joshua, giving him an unimpressed but amused look. “Angel and devil, hm? Very original. You could’ve put some effort in, hyung.”

Your boyfriend huffed a sigh as he slid in next to you, rolling his eyes slightly at the teasing. “I’ll have you know, this costume took me years to put together,” he hummed, reaching up to run a hand over his horns. 

Seungkwan rolled his eyes heartily in return, pausing to take a long sip from his cup. “Bad joke.”

You pouted, crossing your arms. “You better be the only one to think that. I wanna win this famous costume contest!”

“Good luck with that,” he cooed, patting your hair underneath your halo, “rookies aren’t known to win. Jun and Minghao are in it to win it this year too, and there’s only so much Shua-hyung’s pretty face and your cute self can do when those two are determined.”

You frowned, shifting closer into Joshua’s side. He smiled down at you, giving your waist a reassuring squeeze. “You never know, Kwan,” he hummed. “It’s kind of a toss up, sometimes. I mean, Soonyoung won last year.” 

He huffed a sigh and rolled his eyes, and you and your boyfriend shared an amused glance at his annoyance. “That was a fluke,” he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “And entirely Jeonghan’s fault. I will not be convinced otherwise.”

Joshua laughed quietly, nodding. “Okay, yeah. I’ll give you that. I really think we have a chance this year, though. Couples' costumes always do better, and we’ve made a joke.”

Glancing at his watch, the younger man grinned. “You’ll find out soon, hyung. It’s time to get started.”

Joshua had warned you, briefly, about how seriously he and his friends took their yearly costume contest, but it didn’t fully sink in until each party goer was parading in front of you, dressed to the nines. It became clear, as you and your boyfriend walked the dancefloor-turned-runway that few of his friends were impressed by his display, not too far off from his daily look. It was only when he stopped, gesturing back toward you with a flourish, that the crowd erupted into cheers. Flushed and giggling, you took the hand he offered and quickly disappeared back into the crowd. 

“So?” he asked, tugging you back against his chest as he leaned against the wall. “Think we’ll win?”

Laughing softly, you shook your head. “Not a chance. I mean, look at Jun and Minghao. And honestly, Wonwoo and his partner as black cats are pretty cute, too.”

To your surprise, your boyfriend snorted, and you could hear in his voice the way he rolled his eyes. “Please. He can literally turn into a cat. He could’ve done what I did instead of buying cheap ass ears!”

You blinked, gears turning in your head for a moment as you recalled your conversation in the car. “Wait. When you said we, you meant—”

“Oh, yeah, all of the guys. Wonwoo can turn into a cat, Seungkwan and Dokyeom are kind of siren-esque…” he explained, eyes glancing over the room. 

You frowned, looking up at your boyfriend. “What are you, then?” 

He smirked, fangs flashing dangerously for a moment before your attention was pulled to Soonyoung, shouting over the din, “Time for the voting and rankings!”

You felt more than you saw Joshua’s smile as he leaned down to whisper in your ear, “I guess it remains a mystery.”

“Next year, you have to actually try,” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest. It took all of Joshua’s willpower not to laugh, following your glare to where Minghao held his trophy. “Tell me we at least beat Jeonghan.” The apologetic look he gave you spoke volumes, and you groaned. 

“I’m sorry, angel. I promise, he’d be insufferable if we won,” he hummed, wrapping his arms around your waist. A shudder lit down your spine at the sudden proximity, coupled with his warm breath next to your ear. “I can think of a few ways to make it up to you, though.” Pressing his lips to your pulse, he held you tighter when you jumped at the foreign feeling of his tail winding around your bare thigh. 

You hummed, pleased as you melted back into his arms. He was intoxicating, taking over your senses when he got you like this, making you putty in his hands. “Can you? I don’t know if I believe you.”

“You should, sweetheart,” he purred, fingers dancing over your sides. “Unless you don’t want me to show you what kind of hell an incubus can raise.”

taglist: @/justhere4kpop @thatonenoona to be added, fill out the form here.

© November 2023 nebulousbrainsoup | all rights reserved. do not copy, repost or translate my work.

---

— ✧ isohel

i·so·hel (noun) a line on a map connecting points having the same duration of sunshine

pairing. hong joshua x reader

description. fairytales can be rather misleading, can't they? when you and your mother are ripped away from your life at the castle, you spend over a decade resenting the royalty. so naturally, when you find prince joshua at your doorstep, you’re more than eager to shut the door on him. but as your life takes twists and turns, you happen to find yourself in the arms of a man you never thought you'd have to see again.

genre. slowburn, modern royalty au, angst, fluff

tags. prince!joshua, developing relationships, slut shaming, allusions / references to greek mythology, dialogue heavy, implied se

fic playlist

w/c. 26.2k

a/n. lwk don't like the beginning but i swear it gets better🙄 thank u @cheolhub for beta reading & @jeonghantis & @gyuswhore for reading it over and helping out w this bc i think i was going insane over this story by myself >_&lt;; ... i highly suggest listening to the song isohel by eden! it was a major inspiration for this whole story and i think it encapsulates the vibes really well c: hope u enjoy!

The sound of glass shattering isn’t foreign to your ears.

It’s common in the sweltering heat of the summer when the air is hot and sticky. Maids running around to tend to the evenings balls and parties only for the sweat to breach their fingers and suddenly their stack of fine china goes tumbling to the ground.

A bed of hyacinths sits in front of you as you bring up the hose and spray them down, watching through the tinted glass as two male helpers rush to the woman on the ground, quickly helping her clean up the shards of glass.

Turning your attention back to the plants in front of you, you turn the hose off and roll it back into the corner as you skip to the end of the greenhouse where there’s your mother’s desk space. It’s a measly little space but she hardly sits there anyways, always tending to the gardens in the courtyards, leaving the floral and herbal greenhouses under your care while she’s away.

After all, your mother is a gardener and botanist in the Hong palace, and having been a trusted employee for the past half decade since your father passed, she exudes the little privileges of getting to bring her daughter to work.

At least that’s what you think, because you’re only nine years old and naive.

She teaches you well—you’ve only been accompanying her on the weekends when you don’t have school, but you’ve already picked up on how to tell the differences between an infected plant and an unaffected one, the characteristics of a good caterpillar and the characteristics of a bad one, the exact amount you should water each species, and exactly when you should let the vapor run down.

It’s easy work, and you love it.

You love sitting at your mother’s desk and imagining what it’d be like to be her—successful and working in the castle, doing what you love instead of working some stupid nine to five. You love looking out the glass of the greenhouses every few moments when you pause reading your book. You love the rare moments when you get to lay your eyes on one of the members of the royal family walking by.

You’ve started to pick up on their characters in the small frame of time you get to see them when they pass by. The Queen has kind eyes, the King is a bit intimidating, and Prince Joshua … Prince Joshua has soft features you can’t quite read.

“He’s only a year older than you!” one of your friends from school said when you told her that you stayed at the castle during the weekends to help your mother. “You should marry him and become princess!”

You had to push her away and watch her disappointed eyes when you told her that you hardly get to see him for more than ten seconds, even on the rare occasions that he crosses your vision.

The sound of glass shattering isn’t foreign to your ears, but hearing it more than twice in one hour does have some alarms ringing in your head. When you glance back up at the window, time stops.

Your mother is on the ground. Limbs sprawled out with eyes wide in horror, she scrambles against the rough stone path as a man looms over her. He dons a deep purple robe—the kind that belongs to the advisors of the Court—and your young mind races through the possibilities of what warrants the disgusted look on his face.

“Sneaking around with royal blood. Who do you think you are?”

A man watches, dark and brooding from the corner, and then you recognize him. Advisor Lee. He stops by the greenhouses sometimes—a high advisor of the Counsel and distance relative of the King’s. You’re nine years old and naive, but you are not dense.

Something had happened between your mother and Advisor Lee. Something tells you it’s more than you can understand, but in this moment, you feel you understand perfectly.

“You whore,” the man in the dark robes spits out, punctuating his disgust with a stomp of his feet right by your mother’s leg.

You’re only nine years old, but that is old enough to know that that is not a nice word. Nine years old, and you know that that means a very bad thing. Nine years old and when you look at your mother’s grief stricken face, you are certain that everything is about to change.

Your house was always on the edge of the town. Before the affair between Advisor Lee and your mother, it was because she liked having the space to open a garden in your backyard. The city is crowded and full of bustling roads and buildings—it’s no fit for the small cottage that she wanted.

Now, after the affair, your house is on the edge of the town for a different reason.

The first day after your mother is fired from her position at the castle, you go to school with your head hanging low. It’s in the city, and for the first time in your five years of schooling, your mother tells you to go alone.

“I can’t—I shouldn’t drive you anymore,” she tells you as you pack your backpack. She walks you to the bus station and hands you a paper telling you which stop to get off at and how to walk to school from there.

You’re not sure what you’re expecting when you two walk up to the little stop by the street, but when you approach the small crowd of people waiting for the next bus to come in, their chatter hushes. Sparing glances at you and your mother, they whisper—some hushed, some blatant, some sad, some angry.

That’s where she stops and puts a heavy hand on your shoulder. “You can take it from here, yeah?” she asks, but you know it’s not really a question. Nodding, you slowly walk towards the crowd of people as the next bus parks in front of the stop.

You don’t turn around and look at your mother because you know that’d be a mistake. Instead, you let your neck droop, following the quiet crowd as they pile into the bus, clutching the strings of your backpack.

There aren’t any places to sit, so you reach for a pole but suddenly the bus starts and you lurch forward, falling to the ground. There’s black and brown dust on the palms of your hand as you push yourself up, no one saying a word or bothering to help as you keep your head down and grip onto a pole.

The knees of your stockings are dirtied, and it’s the only thing you look at the whole ride, it’s the only thing you look at when you silently take the walk to school, and it’s the only thing you look at when you make your way onto campus.

It’s the whispers again, and as you quietly sink into your normal seat, you hear them louder.

Did you hear about her mother? She isn’t allowed in the castle grounds anymore. What did her mother do? I can’t believe she showed up, I’d be crying at home. I wonder what she’s thinking—

Nothing. You think nothing when your teacher announces that class will be starting. All you focus on is the board and your notebook. You spend your recess and lunch at the school’s library, and as soon as the final bell rings, you scurry off campus and towards the bus station.

It isn’t like the morning—people don’t hush and stare, but nine years old is smart enough to know that it’s because they don’t know you’re your mother’s daughter. There aren’t any empty seats just like the morning but this time, a nice gentleman offers you his spot.

You can tell he isn’t so sure of his decision though, when you finally get off at your stop and you run off to your mother who’s waiting for you by the bench. From the corner of your vision, you watch the man through the bus window, jaw tight and gaze cold as he watches you slip your hand into your mother’s.

Your mother doesn’t talk on the short walk home. She doesn’t ask you about school and she doesn’t ask you about what the other kids said. You figure that she doesn’t need to hear it anyways, and so you purse your lips together.

You have a lot to get used to.

Your life doesn’t change much, and you get used to it.

School days are spent with your head buried in a new book with every break you have. Your time at home is nothing but studying and your mother teaching you how to tend to the garden in your yard.

Soon you are graduating and moving on with your life as you make the transition to college, although you can’t say much changes. You study, you read, and occasionally you commission a project. It’s usually just renovating a citizen’s yard, sometimes it’s designing a public garden, but it’s never anything too serious.

Right now, you’re perched on a wooden stool, elbows leaning on the counter as you swipe your thumb over your tongue to flip the next page of your book. The paper is worn through, soft under your touch as a show for all it’s been through—bought second hand from your boss.

Your boss is a kind old man who happened to be a friend of your late grandfather’s, and when his little bookstore was teetering on the edge of being forgotten, you couldn’t refuse the offer to step in to work.

You’re around halfway through the book when you hear the familiar ringing of the bell above the door, head snapping up only to see your boss at the front door with a few envelopes in one hand, a plastic bag in the other.

“Holding up the fort, I see,” he greets with a low chuckle as you stand up and walk over, taking the bag from his hand to help out.

“As always, Mr. Min,” you reply, setting the bag of books down on the counter. “Are these—”

“They’re your mothers. I was walking by your house this morning and she asked me to take these and add them to our stock, since she said she doesn’t need them anymore.”

“Huh,” you say softly, taking out the various books about plants. “Not sure how big the market for gardening books is anymore, but I’m sure I can add it to our catalog after hours today,” you mutter, setting them on the table behind the register as he places the letters in his hand.

“Your mother also told me to give you this,” he says, his tone an octave lower as he plucks out one the envelopes and hands it to you. You knit your eyebrows together, wiping your dusty hands down on your pants before taking a look at it. “It’s from—”

“The castle,” you whisper, holding the envelope closer to your face to make sure you’re seeing it correctly. “Oh my god—it’s from the castle.”

“Yeah. Must be important if your mom felt the need to send it through me instead of just waiting for you to come home and take a look at it.”

“A-are you sure this is meant for me?” you manage to ask, flipping the envelope over a few times to make sure you read your name correctly.

“Yup,” Mr. Min replies, pointing down at where the intended recipient is listed. Sure enough, it’s your name listed in dark and bold ink in one corner, and then there’s that stupid royal emblem of the sun in the other corner.

Your heart sinks to your stomach at the possibilities of what could be inside, raking your mind for an answer. Was something wrong? Was it about your mother? Or was this just some big mistake?

Dear Madam,

The Hong Royal Counsel wishes to find you well, as we present a request.

Your reputation with your mother’s work as well as the operation of your own gardens throughout the city, along with your academic achievements at our very own Hong University have reached our ears, and we believe you possess the skills required for a special project we have in mind.

You will have the opportunity to lead this project as you please and earn a notable financial sum in payment for your efforts.

Please indicate your acceptance by replying to this letter at your earliest convenience. We eagerly await your response and sincerely hope that you will be able to grace our kingdom with your talent and presence.

Thank you,

Hong Royal Counsel

You don’t have to read the letter more than once before you scoff, tossing the crisp paper and letting it drift down onto the counter before muttering under your breath, “Who do they think they are?” Crumpling the envelope and letter up, you throw it down into the trash can by your chair.

Knocks on your door aren’t normal. The delivery and mailmen know better than to do that, leaving your packages and mail by the doorstep and doing no more than that.

Knocks on your door usually mean Mr. Min is here for something—picking up some of the veggies your mother grew because the store prices are too high, dropping off a book, or indulging in some pleasantries and casual small talk.

It’s eight in the morning when you hear the soft rapping against your front door. Your mom is in the kitchen and your room, right next to the foyer, has walls thin enough to let the sounds through. You’re on your bed though, and it’s comfortable, warm, and it’s too early to be out and about anyways. You’ve just spent the past nine months laboring away at college, so you’re granting yourself these few moments of peace in the morning.

Pressing your head into the pillow, you try to drown out the noise of your mother conversing with Mr. Min this early in the morning. After you hear the door open, there’s a silence and for a moment, you think you’ve succeeded in plugging your ears well enough.

You’re about to smile to yourself and drift back into a heavy sleep before you hear a loud gasp.

It takes a lot to surprise your mother—you’ve come to learn that in recent years. It takes a lot to stun her, to have her gasp as you just heard. Scurrying out of bed, you press your ear against the wall in hopes to catch a glimpse of what’s going on.

All you hear is silence.

It hardly takes a second for you to shove off your blankets and throw yourself into the hallway, rushing towards the foyer where you see your mother standing in front of the open door. She stays unmoving and you wince for a few moments, eyes still adjusting to the morning light as you make your way closer to the door to see what exactly has her so shocked.

And then you catch it: a glint of that wretched, golden sun emblem stitched onto a purple velvet coat.

“What the f—”

Your mother’s hand flies up and grabs your wrist tightly. It’s the first time you see her move, and as she turns around to face you with dark, warning eyes, you press your lips shut as you glance over her shoulder. In front of your doorstep is a man you never thought you’d get to see in person again, not after that day.

Prince Joshua is just as handsome as the tabloids and social media make him out to be, and his presence in your life also seems to be equally infuriating.

“What is he doing here?” you hiss, pulling your mother closer to you so she’s close enough to hear you.

Her eyes are somber, and you silently wonder how she can be so calm, so docile, so—so tame. “They’re here for you,” she whispers, turning her whole body so her back faces the prince.

“What are you talking about? Why would—”

“The letter sent to you from the kingdom. I thought you told me it was a mistake.”

“It was,” you mutter, eyes glancing at Prince Joshua behind her. His gaze is averted, presumably out of respect for the conversation you’re having with your mother right now, but you can’t find it in yourself to appreciate him for it.

“Then why is he asking for your name?”

You gulp anxiously, eyes flickering between your mother’s eyes and the floor. “I don’t know.”

“Talk to him. It must be important,” she orders, walking forward and toward the kitchen and you grab her shoulder quickly.

“Are you kidding me? Why—why would I talk to him? Why would I talk to any of them?” you argue louder than you intended, and your mother swats your hand away sharply.

“They’re royalty,” she says, voice strained with caution.

“And? It’s not medieval times where they actually rule over us so—”

Your mother sighs heavily and then it hits you that no matter how much logic you try to expend, it’d be futile. “Talk to him. It isn’t quite like you have a choice.”

“You of all people shouldn’t put up with this,” you state and the second the words leave your lips, you regret it. Her face hardens and there’s a cold feeling that sinks in your stomach as she frees herself of your grasp and marches away.

You’re left watching her back fade into the rest of your house as your eyes are wide and you’re becoming increasingly aware of the presence of another person behind you. A person who is very important and very famous and very much a representation of all the things you loathe.

Turning on your heel, you don’t bother to push your lips up into a morning grin facing Prince Joshua with tired eyes and frown etched into your mouth. Taking a deep breath, you glance back at your mother who is in a far off room, deciding that whatever he needs to say to you, she doesn’t need to hear.

Slipping on some slippers, you quickly walk out of the house and close the door behind you, putting you right in front of Prince Joshua who waits for you with bright eyes.

“Hi,” he greets, voice airy and light as he takes a few steps back so he can bow, of which you begrudgingly return. “Sorry to bother you so early in the morning, I was just taking care of some work in the area and was told to stop by and talk to you about something.”

He sounds sincere, and his lips curve into a pleasant expression when he speaks, and you wonder if he’s plain stupid playing dumb to save you the humiliation of the situation—a royal prince speaking to the daughter of ‘a slut who seduced the royal advisor.’

So unable to decipher anything about his true intentions, you ask bluntly, “Is it about the letter I got from the kingdom two weeks ago?”

Prince Joshua chuckles nervously, rubbing the back of his neck and you catch the fancy white fabric of his buttoned up shirt underneath the coat. “I mean, yes it is and—”

You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest. “Why do you guys even bother sending letters? It’s the 21st century, you know? Emails exist.”

His face reddens, looking away before pursing his lips together. “Some things are just kept out of tradition,” Prince Joshua reasons quickly. “But I totally understand that, we’ll keep emailing in mind. But for the meantime, that’s, uh, kind of what I’m here for. We didn’t hear back a response, and I would like to take your answer back to the castle for you.

“Isn’t no response enough of a response?”

“Well—”

“My answer is no, if that wasn’t obvious,” you say, turning back to the door. “Is that all?”

“Wait!” he exclaims, grabbing your arm with his white leather gloves. It’s a bit surprising, really—he seems awfully timid for a prince and you’re a bit unnerved by how he hasn’t reprimanded you yet for being disrespectful. “Is there a reason why you don’t want to take on the job? If there are some specifics, maybe we can adjust the arrangement so it’s more to your liking.”

Your eyes widen, bewildered. “What? No I—I don’t care for anything like that, I won’t take the job.”

“Aren’t you just a ray of sunshine,” he mutters under his breath before his eyebrows knit together as he looks at the ground, seemingly trying to figure something out. “Is it the money? We can negotiate your salary,” he offers and you shake your head.

“No, it’s not the money—I don’t care about the money,” you say harshly. “It’s not any of that, I just don’t want to.”

“Can you tell me why? It’s just, I’ll have to report this back to the Counsel and if I’m not able to recruit you, they’d at least want some reasoning for why.”

Inhaling sharply, it takes all your self control to not let your eye twitch and slam the door in his face. “Are you really asking me why I don’t want to?” Pursing your lips together, you glare at him harshly. “You were there that day, weren’t you?” you ask more quietly, and for a moment you see Prince Joshua falter. “Not that I’d expect you to care but surely you can at least understand why I don’t want to.”

“I-I’m sorry, but I really can’t change the past.”

Scoffing, you turn on your heel and open the door. “I’m not asking you to.”

“Wait—just wait a sec’!” he calls out, stopping the door with his palm before you close it. “You’re in your second year at Hong University, right?” He doesn’t wait for a response before he continues. “We’ll pay for the rest of your tuition.”

The air in your lungs seems stuck for a passing moment, and you shake your head to yourself, stepping into your house and turning around one last time with cold eyes and a deep frown. “No.”

The prince looks around hastily before blurting out, “We’ll do all of it!”

“All of what?”

“We’ll pay for all of your tuition—reimburse you for what you’ve already paid.” You don’t care. You shouldn’t care. “All of it, plus your hourly wage,” he adds, and you don’t even have a chance to think before you feel your mother’s hand on your back.

“She’ll do it.”

Your mother chuckles as she helps you tie the lavender colored robe around your waist. You’re not sure what she finds so funny about this, but you bite your tongue when you start to catch on how she ties the ribbons with such ease.

Over ten years of being away from the castle can’t erase the time she spent there, tying her own robe every morning before she was stripped of her title, and in turn, also the life she worked so hard to build up.

As you look down at the smooth fabric sent to you a week earlier from the castle, you’re forced to begrudgingly admire the intricate embroidery. The collar and ribbons are decorated with a darker purple stitching that runs in all sorts of twists and turns and swivels around the curves of your body.

“They’ve made them look nicer since I’ve last seen them,” she thinks out loud, matting her hands down your shoulders to smooth the fabric down one last time before taking a look.

“I don’t understand why you’re still so—” You inhale sharply and press your lips together, warning yourself to not say anything more when she shoots you a cautionary look. “Sorry,” you mutter, turning away so you can glance at yourself in the mirror. You do look pretty nice, if you had to admit.

“Just think about the money,” your mother encourages. “They’re covering the cost of all your schooling—all those days spent at Mr. Min’s can now go towards things you enjoy, rather than paying for your university.”

“I guess,” you grumble, adjusting your hair one last time before grabbing your phone and keys, walking towards the foyer.

“You know the way right?” your mother calls out as you slip on your shoes and walk out onto the front porch.

“I wish I didn’t,” is all you say, low and under your breath as you make your way to the car.

The castle lies in the heart of the city, so it’s quite the drive. You’re careful as you try to keep your robes clean, bunching it up to your thighs as you drive, and once you’ve made your way to the castle, you’re sure to make sure the hem of the bottom doesn’t hit the ground.

Reporting to the entrance that was given in your email (why they send emails for instructions but not the actual invitation to your job still remains a mystery to you), you carefully tuck your phone into a crevice of your robes.

The entrance starts at a gate on the east end of the castle, and you make your way to the little hut that sits at one end where a woman in a lavender polo and dress pants sits at a desk. Knocking on the window, you smile nervously as she looks up from her papers.

“Can I help you?”

“Yes!” you say, holding up your phone and pointing to your first day instructions. “It’s my first day here, and I’m not sure how to get inside and all.”

“Did they give you a code?”

“Uh, yeah let me check again,” you murmur, looking back at your phone to find the 5 digit code you were sent. “It’s, uh—32423.” The lady hums and nods, checking something on her computer before looking up at you with a smile.

“That’s correct. From now on you can just come through the smaller gate on the side—it should be to the left of this big gate, and just put in whatever code you have. It changes every few days but you’ll be notified with the new password every time it does.”

“Thank you,” you say, glancing over your shoulder to look at the gate she’s talking about.

“For now, just follow me. Since it’s your first day, I’ll show you the way to the … where was it you need to get to?”

“Right here it says the Advisory Quart?”

The girl’s eyes widen as she sits up from her seat and walks out of the hut, leading you toward the smaller gate. “Seriously?” she asks as she punches in the code, the gate automatically opening once she’s done.

The gate leads to a narrow pathway that runs slightly uphill in the midst of a lush field of trimmed green grass and sparse flowers that was previously hidden from you by the large stone halls. You remember the scene vaguely, but it’s a lot lovelier in person than you remember. Glancing up the pathway, you catch sight of the large castle in front of you, and the vision has an uneasy feeling floating in your stomach.

“Uh yeah, is that surprising?” you respond, hoping the small talk will distract you, even if it’s only a little.

“I mean the Advisory Quart is no joke. Those people work like crazy dogs—” she says with a laugh before looking at you with wide eyes. “Wait, I’m sorry—please don’t tell anyone I said that, they’ll—”

“Don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me. But please do continue—what were you saying? I haven’t been in that castle in a long—I’ve never been to the castle before, so I’m not up to speed with all the different Quarts and sectors and stuff.”

“Oh well, it’s just that the Advisory Quart does a lot of work … I swear they’re always running around, talking about some new project they’re working on,” she says as you follow her up some steps, nearing an entrance to a building connected to the castle.

“What kind of projects?” you ask curiously.

“Oh gosh, everything, I tell you, they do pretty much everything. From helping the King with his own decisions to doing absolutely random, huge projects, there always seems to be someone who’s on top of everything. I remember I had a friend whose husband worked up there—they were working on designing a whole new ballroom and no one had any idea why! So what are you going to be doing there?”

Chuckling nervously, you aren’t sure if you should tell this girl that you don’t really know. “One of those random projects, I assure you,” you tell her because you’re pretty sure it’s true. After all, you’re almost positive they won’t have you be doing anything that’s worthwhile.

“Ah, well you’ll probably be swamped either way,” the girl says with a sigh as you reach a large wooden door. “Anyways, we’ll part ways here. Just go through these doors and there’ll be a big hallway. Ignore all the different corridors and doors on the side, and just go straight and you can see there’s an open room at the end of this hallway. That’s where your check-in will be, and the people there will direct you to wherever you need to go.”

You blink a few times, taking in all the information before nodding meekly, bowing and thanking the girl for her time as she walks away. Taking a deep breath, you open the door with a loud creaking noise, stepping into the grand hallway.

The walls are beige with ornate accents lining the bottom and top, intricate designs carved into the ceilings that hang chandeliers in intervals. Your sandals clack against smooth travertine marble as your eyes roam the entrances to different corridors and rooms, doors dark and wooden, similar to the one you just entered through.

There aren’t many people in the long hallways, passing by only a few others who seem to have their attention busied by papers or their phone. Some of them are wearing similar fashioned robes to yours, while most of the others are wearing the same lavender colored polo and white slacks as the girl who brought you here.

Smoothing the fabric below your waist one more time as you near the large open room you were directed to, you glance around and find a desk with a kind looking receptionist talking to a man wearing your kind of robes.

Quietly approaching the desk, you stand a few feet behind him, patiently waiting for them to finish so you can step up. Neither of them seem to notice, being caught up in a conversation that seems a bit of a mix of professional and leisurely.

Twiddling with your fingers behind your back, you rock side to side on your feet as you wait for the two to finish up talking about how they’re excited for the next ball that’s coming up, not bothering to think about who these people might be and why they’re even invited to it.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” the man at the counter calls out, “I can help you.” He smiles and waves you over before nudging the other man on his shoulder. “Seokmin, go—you’re distracting me.”

The man he pushed is a handsome looking guy, light brown hair falling just above his eyes as he turns around and gives a small smile, stepping to the side but not fully backing away. “Ah, sorry about that. Go ahead, we were just catching up.”

“No worries,” you say quickly, walking up to the receptionist. “I’m here to find the Advisory Quart I think? I was told to report to this entrance, and the lady at the front told me to come here—it’s my first time here so—”

“Your first time in the castle?” the other man asks you with wide eyes.

“Uh, well—”

“Don’t mind him—Seokmin, you know better than to mess with the newbies,” the receptionist murmurs, and you frown at the word. He catches on and looks up at you, holding a hand out. “No offense.”

“N-none taken. So could you help me—I’m really not sure where to go.”

“Yeah of course. Does your email say who you’ll be reporting to?”

“It says here ‘Mr. Park.’”

“Oh okay, his room number’s going to be 77, right down that corridor right there,” the receptionist tells you kindly, pointing at one of the side hallways you saw while walking here. “Since it’s your first day, I’ll let him know that you’ll be coming down so he can be ready. I’m sorry, what’s your name?”

“Thank you so much,” you say bowing, quickly telling him your name. So caught up in the kindness of these peers, you almost forgot why you were so reluctant to come here in the first place, but no worries, this receptionist does a good job of reminding you.

His lips press into a thin line as raises a brow, asking you to repeat your last name again. When your answer slips from your lips, it’s much quieter. A heavy cloud sinks over you as you realize that even after years away, your family name is still tainted.

“Okay,” the receptionist finally says briskly, and you’re taken aback by how cold his voice has become. “I’ll let him know you’re coming down. You can proceed now.”

He doesn’t give you a ‘good luck,’ or a ‘have a nice day,’ or a ‘do you have any questions,’ despite his cheery attitude from before. Now he’s looking at you with an expressionless face and eyes that won’t meet yours as you shamefully turn away.

So caught up in the disappointment, you hardly notice how the other man—Seokmin—is still watching the scene unfold. As you walk away from the open room, there’s a hand on your wrist. Whipping around, you’re faced with a Seokmin whose face seems unreadable, just like the receptionists. Except something is … different. He seems sincere, and you feel safe.

“You might get lost trying to get there,” Seokmin says rather casually, letting go of your hand and walking next to you. “Come on, I’ll show you the way—I’m working under Mr. Park too actually, I’m his intern—so I know the way pretty well and can fill you in on what he’s like.”

You wonder why Seokmin isn’t acting like the receptionist. Your family name is still somewhat taboo in the city outside the castle, so you were pretty confident when walking into the actual place of the ‘crime scene’ that you’d be even more … generally disliked.

Seokmin seems to be different though, and you can’t quite figure out why.

Seokmin lets you know Mr. Park is mean when he wants, which seems to be always. Direct with his words but also, you have to read in between the lines sometimes if you don’t want to get scolded. You’re not sure what to do with that information, because Seokmin doesn’t tell you much else.

You walk down the corridor with him before stopping in front of a wooden door to your right, labeled with that familiar sun emblem and a golden plated plaque reading ‘77.’ “C’mon, he should be in here right now,” Seokmin says, pressing against the frame and pushing the door open.

Inside is a room unlike the others you’ve seen before. The ceiling is much lower and baskets of plants hang from it, vines lining the limestone walls, and pots and beds of plants sit by the smaller desks that litter the area. There’s a larger desk at the end opposite to the door, and you see a man with grey hair and firm eyes sitting at the ornate chair, reading through a stack of papers.

“Ah, Seokmin,” he says, standing up when he notices the two of you by the door, and it’s not you realize that this man is Mr. Park. Both you and Seokmin bow hastily. “I was waiting for the two of you to arrive.” His gaze then turns to you, and it’s sharp. “What took you so long?” His tone is harsh and you almost wince. “It isn’t your first time in the castle,” Mr. Park says bluntly, and for once you are taken aback because no one has addressed the cloud hanging over your head so directly yet.

“I’m sorry sir, I haven’t been here in—”

“No excuses. Don’t be late again.”

“Y-yes sir,” you reply meekly, faltering in your step a little.

Mr. Park sighs heavily and looks at Seokmin, waving him off. “Go to the Ballroom and ask around to see if they need anything for tonight. Don’t be slow like last time.”

“Yes sir! Right on it,” Seokmin says with a nod, quickly turning on his heel and scurrying out of the room.

“And for you …” Mr. Park mutters as he takes in your figure with an unnerving look on his face. “I need you to lead a project.”

Your eyes bulge out of your head. “Lead a project? I don’t even know what—”

“Word has it that the Prince himself had to bribe you with a whole four years of Hong tuition to get you here. Surely you didn’t think you’d be given light work.” people knew about that?

“Well, I didn’t know much about anything and I don’t even know what work I’m supposed—”

“You’ll figure it out, soon enough,” Mr. Park tells you briskly, walking over to his desk where a large chalkboard sits to its left. Using a stick, he points at a word written in a corner. Garden. “The Queen has a courtyard that she no longer likes the look of. It’s been stripped down, and you’re in charge of turning it into a garden of her liking.”

You knit your eyebrows together. “A-a whole courtyard?”

Mr. Park raises a brow. “Are you saying that it’s too much for you?”

“N-no!” you exclaim quickly. “I’m just surprised, that’s all. I don’t get why I would be chosen to do this.”

Mr. Park huffs, and you wonder how such a tiny old man can fit so much sass in him. “If you must know: the Queen loved how your …” he pauses and within a fraction of a second you have a feeling where this is going, “… your mother designed the gardens on the West end.”

Mr. Park walks towards his desk and sits down, not looking at you as he cards through a few binders. “The Queen wants a similar style for this courtyard but since we can’t exactly have her back …”

You wince for real this time as you conclude, “… you tried to get the next closest thing.”

Mr. Park nods, not returning a snarky comment this time, much to your pleasure. “I’m the head of Design & Architecture, by the way, if you have any questions ask me—as long as it’s not stupid. You lead your project—design it and plan it. When you need people to work on it just talk to Seokmin and he’ll assign someone. You have three months to finish it. If you need an extension, you’ll have to get it approved by me.”

“Okay,” you respond quickly, trying to take in all the information at once. “Is there, like, a theme? Anything she wants in particular?”

“That’s a stupid question,” Mr. Park says bluntly and you frown as he points at a desk behind you. “Your desk is there. Any information you need will be there.”

“Y-yes sir, thank you,” you say, bowing and turning on your heel to sit down at your new chair. The desk is dark, wooden, and completely barren except for a thin folder set in the middle. Opening it, there’s a single paper inside with only a few bullet points typed out, and it hardly takes you a moment to read through all of it.

It’s vague—your only real requirements are the adherence to the kingdom’s symbolic purple colors, and inclusion of a general theme throughout the courtyard.

You furrow your eyebrows at the lack of guidance—were you really left to make such major decisions about such a large space in a castle you haven’t been in years? There’s so much room for error and disappointment and rejection, and after the past years of being treated like your family was nothing but a mistake, you aren’t sure if you can handle any more of it.

Closing your eyes, you absentmindedly nod to yourself in a silent promise. Closing the folder, you stand up. “Mr. Park, sir, do you know where the courtyard—”

“There is a map on the wall. Figure it out.”

You huff, glancing at the large map of the castle next to the chalkboard. This is going to be harder than you thought.

You run into Seokmin just as you leave 77, and he helps lead you to the courtyard. “So you’re working on this one, huh,” he says under his breath as you both appear in front of a large plot of land surrounded by castle buildings on all sides. You’re both standing on the East entrance to the courtyard, and there are four adjacent and opposite entrances on all other sides.

“Uh, yeah,” you say steadily, glancing back down at your minimal instructions before looking back up at the courtyard. It’s a square, and if you had to estimate, each side would be around 50 yards long, leaving quite a great deal of space for you to work with it.

“Pretty big project, huh,” Seokmin says, although his tone seems much more lighthearted than your mood. How the hell are you supposed to transform this in three months?

“Yeah,” you mutter, squinting at the bright sunlight as you analyze the plot.

“You know, I can totally help if you want,” Seokmin begins to say, and you take note of how quickly he talks. “I don’t know if Mr. Park told you but you can basically ask me for help on anything and like, I’m really doing this whole interning thing for fun—” Who the hell works as an intern for Mr. Park, for fun? “—so I’d be happy to help.”

“Thanks. I’ll ask if I need anything.”

“Great!” Seokmin cheers, clapping his hands together before looking behind your shoulder and letting his smile brighten. He waves at someone behind you and you purse your lips together, wondering if you should brace yourself for yet another salty interaction.

“Minnie!” a deep voice greets and suddenly, your feet seem glued in their spot. You know that voice.

“Shua, hey!” Seokmin says cheerily, and you silently cringe. “Crazy running into you here, gosh, I haven’t seen you since last week!”

Prince Joshua laughs, and it reminds you of all those years ago when you watched him from inside the greenhouse. You hate how you remember.

“Yeah, my fencing instructor let me off earlier so I thought I might browse around the castle for a bit,” he explains, and when it all goes quiet and you realize that he must be looking at you, but you don’t dare to turn around.

“Oh,” Seokmin exclaims, as if he’s just realized that he forgot something. You feel a tapping on your shoulder, and for a second you debate just running the other way and never letting yourself return to the castle but for something, you’re planted in your place. “Hey, look,” he says quietly in your ear, “It’s the Prince.”

Like you don’t fucking know that. Nodding, you slowly follow his lead and turn around, eyes trained on the ground as you bow.

“Oh, well if it isn’t that little ray of sunshine,” Prince Joshua says, and it takes everything to not let your eye twitch as you finally look up at him. He’s wearing the same royal uniform you say to him when you showed up on his doorstep and his eyes are crinkled as he smiles widely.

Your face burns as Seokmin’s eyes flicker back and forth between you, and your lips are pressed together in an awkward silence. “You know each other?” His face displays nothing but perplexion for a few moments but then it seems that some of the cogs turned and his lips open wide into a large ‘o,’ and Seokmin waves his finger while nodding. “Oh you’re the girl Shua said he had to offer four years worth of—”

“Seokmin,” Prince Joshua interrupts, putting his hand over his friend’s mouth after catching the look of mortification on your face for bringing it up. “Mr. Park was calling you, I’m pretty sure.”

“Ugh, are you kidding me? I thought this would be fun for the summer but he actually has me doing stuff!” As the two converse casually, you wonder how hard it’d be to quickly slip away.

“Not sure what you expected,” Joshua chides his friend before Seokmin groans and you hear the heavy footsteps of him walking away. He calls out your name once and your eyes shoot up as you bashfully wave your hand at him, bidding goodbye.

You’re left in this corridor with the empty thoughts in your head and the goddamn prince of the kingdom. You half expect him to just wave at you and go about his own business, but it seems like you still have a lot of learning to do.

After all, Prince Joshua is a fickle man. “It’s nice to see you again, Sunshine,” he greets, and you think you might pass out from embarrassment. Glancing around, you see a few maids overhear him using the name and murmuring their own whispers amongst themselves as they rush away.

“H-hi,” you say nervously, suddenly aware that much attention is on you now that the prince is speaking to you.

“So this is what you’re working on?” he asks curiously, not paying a single mind to your awkwardness, walking toward the door which leads to the East entrance to the courtyard.

“Yes sir,” you murmur. You could be snappish outside the walls and in the boundaries of your own home but here, you’re bound by royal courtesy and witnesses that surround you. Compliance is all you can manage out in the open.

“Don’t call me sir—you’re around the same age as me, so it feels weird,” Joshua says dismissively, and you furrow your brows at how casual he’s being. “So,” he starts, looking out at the empty yard of dirt, “you got any idea of what you’re going to do with it?”

“Not a clue,” you reply honestly, keeping your answers brisk. Joshua seems to catch on and he pouts at you. How can a man act so childish? The thought lingers in your head for a moment before he starts talking to you.

“So cold. Brighten up Sunshine. I’ll stop in soon to see how it’s going here—I’m interested!” he says cheerily before stepping back and nodding. You bow as he walks away, waving to you one last time before leaving you in the corridor with not a single thought in his mind.

There seems to be a distinct odd air around the prince, except you can’t quite place why that is.

It’s been three weeks since you started working at the castle—time passes quickly when you have loads of work to do and not much time to do it. You spent the first week hunched over at your desk simply raking your mind for ideas, for anything that would give you even a smidge of inspiration.

77 is rather sparse. It’s only really you and Mr. Park actually working in there, with the occasional Seokmin running in and out to tend to everyone’s miniscule needs.

And then there’s Jihoon, who is the only other person who actually works at his desk, even if it’s only for an hour a day. Jihoon is slightly brooding and always has his nose buried in some work, but he seems standoff-ish to just about everyone. He isn’t unkind though, just … just reserved, and you feel thankful that there’s another person somewhat like you here.

77 is kind to you and your heart. Everyone works on their own schedule and is in their own head, and no one seems to treat you extraordinarily different. You wish the same would go for the rest of the castle.

On the second day of your work, the embroidered name on the fabric over your right breast was clear enough for people to start learning who you were and recognize your face.

But you’re used to the stares—both the subtle and obvious ones—and you are used to the whispers, the guessing games about whether or not you’re a slut just like your mother was.

You’re not, by the way, but you’ve had enough experience with these kinds of people to know that they can guess all they want but you know the answer, and the truth will come to light at some point. You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone, they'll figure it out on their own. Eventually.

By the second week, you figured out a plan and needed to get to work on executing it. Seokmin seemed to be pleased when you asked him for help on that.

“I need people who can build a pathway,” was all you needed to tell him and then he was on the phone, and then the next day you had ten men ready for you by the dirt field ready to work. “I want stone tiles and it needs to curve exactly like this,” you told them, showing them a scaled down map of the area with a long, curvy line running from the North to South ends, and another even more curvy one running from the East to West end.

They didn’t ask questions, which you’re grateful for, because coming up with it was a whole feat on its own. Explaining it would be a whole other story.

As you walk up to the castle’s entrance today, you catch sight of a girl who sits in her little hut in front of the East gate. She’s the same girl who helped you on the first day, you realize. She was kind then, you remember, but now as you meet her gaze, she turns away and pretends to go back to her phone.

You don’t frown or let the gesture sear your heart because in all honesty, that’s exactly what you’re expecting. Sighing, you make your way to the smaller gate and walk the small way up to the actual castle grounds before heading straight to 77.

Jihoon is sitting at his desk but is just about to get up, sending you a quick nod as he stacks his files and walks out of the room. Mr. Park isn’t here, for once, although you did overhear some information about a ball happening tonight so you figure he must be busy.

You’re thankful Seokmin is here, and you catch him watering one of the plants. “Hey, what are you doing?” you ask him hastily, walking up behind his back before grabbing the watering pot from his hands.

“Um … watering … the plants?”

“These are yarrows,” you emphasize, pointing at the white flowers he was just watering.

“Okay … I am really not sure what to do with that information,” Seokmin says slowly as if he isn’t quite processing your words.

Huffing, you tell him, “Yarrows don’t need a lot of water. You aren’t watering them … I think a better word would be drowning.”

“Oh,” Seokmin mutters, looking down at that pot that’s now rich with soaked soil. “Sorry, I, uh, didn’t know,” he apologizes, and you purse your lips together because he does sound sincere.

“It’s okay … sorry for being mean about it,” you add quietly, returning the pot to his hand. “I can send you a list later—of all the plants here and how much water they need.”

Seokmin’s ears perk up. “Really? Thank you, but you seriously don’t have to, you know.”

“I know, but I enjoy talking about plants and stuff. And I’d rather the ones in this room be taken care of nicely, so the least I can do is help you,” you offer before retreating to your desk. “I think I need your help by the way, so can you come with me?” you ask, pulling out a measuring tape from a drawer.

Seokmin nods, dropping the watering bucket by his own desk and following behind you as you leave the room. The journey from the Advisory Quart to your courtyard, which is located near Royal Residence Quart, is quite the walk, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t a little bit pleased that you had someone like Seokmin as company.

“How’s the project turning out?” he asks as you make your way down the long hallways. You catch a few other workers spare the two of you glances and you try to hold your head up and look forward when you respond.

“I’m a little behind,” you admit. “But the construction manager told me that they should be finished with the pathway today, and I asked them to start tilling some other parts of the field so I can get some flora in there soon.”

“Oh really That’s nice—I stopped by the place just the other day and the pathway was looking pretty cool—the color fit in really well.”

“Hm, that’s good … I was worried about that,” you murmur to yourself thoughtfully, pulling out your phone so you can glance at the list of things you need to get done before heading back to 77. Tucking the device back into a crevice of your robe, you smile as you near the East end courtyard entrance. “I gotta get a plaque up here or something,” you remind yourself, looking at the empty space above the entrance.

“You want me to get on that soon?” Seokmin offers and you shrug.

“I guess. I’ll still have to come up with a name for this place …” you say, walking into the courtyard.

“Wow,” Seokmin mutters as he follows behind you. “The pathway looks great!” He pats your back and you throw him a small smile when you look over the two twisting paths that connect the 4 ends of the courtyard. “What was it that you needed my help with again—Oh hey! Shua!”

Oh for fuck’s sake—

“Seokminnie!” that familiar, smooth voice appears from behind you as Seokmin turns on his heel and scurries toward his friend. Slowly and carefully, you tuck your hands behind your back and bow when you turn around and are met with the sight of Prince Joshua. “Sunshine,” he greets with a smile after exchanging his casual pleasantries with his friend.

“Good morning sir,” you murmur as Seokmin bounces up and down on feet from a newfound excitement. How does he have this much energy at nine in the morning?

“I thought I said don’t call me sir,” Prince Joshua tells you, scrunching his face up when you let the word slip from your mouth. “Feels weird.”

“I’m sorry but you’re kind of the prince. I don’t think there’s anything else for me to call you other than ‘sir,’” you huff lowly before slapping a hand over your mouth. You’re not scared of what Joshua might do, per se, but the thought of someone else overhearing your snarky remark has you reminding yourself to be more careful.

Joshua only chuckles. Is there anything that bothers him? “You’re funny,” he comments. “You can call me Joshua, like Minne over here,” he tells you, patting Seokmin’s shoulder affectionately.

Your face sours and you shake your head, “I’m sorry that doesn’t feel right.”

Joshua rolls his eyes playfully, choosing to ignore what you said and instead looks around the courtyard. “Nice pathway. It’s cool that it isn’t straight—is it supposed to be something?”

“Sort of,” you say, turning around to look at the stone on the ground. “It’s confusing.”

Joshua scoffs. “Try me.”

You furrow your eyebrows. Why Prince Joshua—or as he would like you to call him, just Joshua—is so curious about a random courtyard is beyond you. “They’re just lines that follow the movement of sunlight. I guess. I don’t really know how to explain it.”

“That’s cool,” Seokmin chimes in when he sees you pulling out a roll of measuring tape. “Oh yeah, sorry, I didn’t get to hear what you said you needed help with.”

“Oh yeah, I just want to measure a—”

“Sorry for interrupting,” Joshua says, and you frown when he pulls out a buzzing phone, holding it up to Seokmin’s face. “What did you do this time—why is Mr. Park calling me?”

Seokmin’s eyes widen in panic as you watch the scene unfold. “What?! I haven’t done anything wrong recently. Well I don’t think I did and I’m pretty sure—”

He’s cut off by Joshua pressing his finger over his lip, effectively shutting him up. You almost laugh at the way Seokmin complies so quickly, but hold it back as Joshua holds the phone up to his ear. The sounds that come from the call are muffled but you can vaguely make out the voice of your boss before Joshua sighs and ends the call.

“What are yarrows and what did you do to them?” he asks his friend, and this time you actually do stifle out a giggle. Joshua glances at you as you quickly press your lips back into a fine line, both of you turning your attention back to Seokmin whose ears are turning bright red, shoulders tensing up.

“Oh no—I really don’t want another scolding!” he whines.

“Well buckle up, because he’s asking for you back at 77 right now,” Joshua shrugs as Seokmin huffs, stomping off back into the corridor and presumably back toward the Advisory Quart. “Sorry,” he says, turning to you, “I keep sending your assistant away when you need him.”

“It’s fine,” you say gruffly. “I, uh, I can still do this all by my stuff so it’s not really a big deal.”

Joshua narrows his eyes. “Are you sure? I don’t have fencing for another …” He glances down at his star studded wrist watch for a second, “… thirty minutes so I can help out.”

To say you’re mortified by the offer is an understatement. A prince helping out you? He must be fucking with you because—

“Stop giving me weird looks. I know how to help out around here, you know?”

“Duly noted, but I’m not sure how it would look on my end if the prince was helping me out with—” you gesture to the field around you, “—yard work.”

Joshua laughs, and once again you’re left in perplexity. “Weren’t you the one who reminded me that this is the 21st century? I don’t just sit around and do nothing, you know that right?”

“But still,” you mumble.

“Okay fine. If you’re so obsessed with this royal hierarchy thing, then I, as Prince Joshua, am officially requesting you to let me help. Surely you won’t turn that down.”

This man is so weird.

“Fine,” you relent, holding up the measuring tape. “You see that little circle in the middle where the pathways sort of curve around? I need to measure the circumference of it.”

“That’s it?” Joshua asks casually, grabbing one end of the measuring tape as you make your way to the plot. “Oh, I mean I guess it’s kinda big,” he adds, glancing down at the measuring tape. This one only goes up to 15 feet.”

“You’re right,” you mutter to yourself. “Okay here, let’s just use this,” you say, pulling out a roll of thin string and handing one end to Joshua. “If you stand here I’ll just circle it around and measure the length of the string,” you explain, unraveling the roll and walking around the outer edge of the circle, trailing the string behind you.

Joshua just stands in the spot that you placed him, holding the string and frowning. “I feel like I’m not helping much.”

“Trust me,” you reply under your breath. “You’re helping me just enough.” You don’t mean it to come out bitter, but it does anyways.

“What happened to all the royal hierarchy stuff that you were on about?”

Your eyes harden on him as you’ve made it halfway around the length of the circle, pausing to make sure he notices your subtle glare. “If you didn’t know, this is kind of my job on the line, and while you’ve made it clear that what I say doesn’t affect you, I’m not sure the same could be said for what other people see. So I’m sorry if I don’t want people looking at us and getting the wrong idea.”

“What do you mean the wrong idea?”

Huh. And here you thought that with all those royal tutors, the prince would be smart. Too bad for Joshua, but right now, he’s coming off as just about the densest guy alive.

You’ve been working at the castle for five weeks now. Since your last meeting with Joshua (he insists you get rid of the ‘Prince’ and ‘sir’ so diligently now that even in your head, you’ve removed him of those honorifics), you’ve only seen him twice.

The first was three days after he helped you measure the length of your soon to be pond. You were on the phone with a construction contractor in 77 when Joshua popped in to say ‘hi’ to Seokmin (how and why the two are friends, you don’t know, and you don’t care enough to ask). Noticing you were here past the regular working hour of six, he waited for a few moments to let you finish up your call before walking up to your desk.

“You know you don’t get paid overtime, right Sunshine?” he asks, confused on why exactly you were still here.

“Well work needs to get done,” you sigh heavily, taking a few seconds to clean up your desk and throw away a few old designs you sketched earlier.

“Hey, those looked cool, why’d you trash them?”

“They didn’t work,” you tell him, rummaging through more papers to find the few that you actually wanted to keep.

“Told you,” Seokmin comes up from behind Joshua, patting his shoulder. “She’s a tough judge—even on herself.”

“I get what you mean now,” Joshua murmurs, nodding along with his friend.

Your eyes snap up. “Why are you talking about me as if I’m not here—wait, why do you guys talk about me when I’m not here anyways?”

“You’re like the only one that’s nice to me in 77! Well, sort of,” Seokmin reasons with you.

“I mean you do kind of suck as an intern—”

“Hey! I just happened to get distracted a lot. I’m an honest worker, trust!”

You huff, finally finding the paper that you were looking for. It’s a design for a couple plaques that you want posted above the entrances, and you tuck it into a folder.

“Is that in Latin?” Joshua piques when he catches a glimpse of the wording.

“Uh, yeah—you know Latin?”

“He’s a prince. Of course he does,” Seokmin tells you, turning around to nudge his friend on the side. “This spoiled brat has been learning Latin since he was six!”

Joshua scoffs. “Who’re you calling a spoiled brat? You were in those classes with me too!”

You consider wondering about who exactly Seokmin is and why he was in those classes with a prince, why he’s so close with Joshua, and a plethora of questions run through your mind, before you remind yourself that you really don’t care.

“Yeah but—” Seokmin tries to reason with his friend before you stand up and both of their attention are directed at you.

“You’re right Pri—Joshua. I don’t get paid overtime, so I’m gonna get going now.” You bow at him and then Seokmin, grabbing your folder and bag before pushing in your chair and heading to the exit. Awkwardly, the two boys say bye to you before glancing at each other.

“That was weird,” Seokmin says, and Joshua shrugs.

“I guess.”

“Did you actually understand what she wrote or were you just bluffing? I don’t remember shit from those Latin lessons.”

Joshua rolls his eyes and nods. “Yeah, but I only got the second word. Said ‘invictus,’ I think.”

“Huh, cool. Got no clue what that means.”

“It means undefeatable, dipshit,” Joshua groans. “Seriously, how’d you pass that class!”

“Hey, I was a great student—I just have, uh, bad memory,” Seokmin pouts.

“Yeah I can tell … seriously, how did you manage to fuck up the yarrows even after she,” Joshua gestures behind him as if to point at where you exited just a few moments earlier, “sent you all those instructions and all!”

“God, don’t remind me. I actually feel really bad, ‘cause Mr. Park yelled at her too for giving me ‘the wrong instructions,’ but I really just forgot what she told me.” Cringing at the mental image of both you and Seokmin being scolded by Mr. Park, Joshua shakes his head—that is not a pretty scene.

Joshua sighs, the two of them making their way out of the empty 77 and walking down the corridor towards the Royal Residence Quart. “Why’re you even interning for him? You don’t need a job, especially not as one being an assistant.”

“My dad’s pissed at me, remember?” Seokmin tells his friend gruffly, and Joshua purses his lips at the mention of the older man.

“Right.”

“Wanted to punish me for the summer or whatever, but I guess it’s not too bad. The staff are actually pretty funny, and your Sunshine girl is really bossy so she gives me a lot of work to do.”

“I can’t tell if you’re complaining or celebrating.”

“Both, I think,” Seokmin replies, the two of them laughing together. “Why do you talk to her so much? She’s even snappier to you than to me, and trust me, I can be pretty damn annoying.”

“Like I don’t know that,” Joshua mutters teasingly, earning him a punch on the arm. “But anyways, she seems interesting. Like cool, you know what I mean.”

“I guess,” Seokmin says absentmindedly. “Wonder what my dad would say about that.”

“Okay well your dad isn’t the King so I don’t really think it matters what your dad says about it.”

Seokmin raises a brow. “You sure? My dad almost had me transferred out of 77 because he heard I had to work with her.”

“Well that’s his own problem I guess. Just don’t let him bring it up with my dad because I’m not keen on having any more drama in this castle,” Joshua mumbles, stopping in front of the big door that leads to the residence.

Seokmin nods at one of the guards standing by the door, and she presses a code to a small box on the wall and the doors open. “You coming? Dinner’s about to be served,” he calls to Joshua when he walks forward but realizes his friend isn’t by his side.

Smiling, Joshua shakes his head and waves Seokmin off. “I’m gonna take a breather for a bit. Tell them to start dinner without me.”

Seokmin laughs. “You know they won’t do that.”

“I know, I know, but it’s the gesture that counts anyways. I’ll be back in twenty, trust.”

The second time you saw Joshua was yesterday evening just as you were just leaving 77 to head home, your arms full of papers to look through in the night. After getting the pathways cleaned up, you needed to work on adding more structures to the courtyard, but were at a loss of what to make and what to make it with.

With your stack of papers that were littered with different possible materials and architectural structures that you promised yourself to get through by the end of the night, even if it meant pulling a whole damn all nighter.

“Is Sunshine leaving at a normal time for once?” Joshua asks with a faux gasp as he comes across you in the hallway.

With the paper’s digging into your arms, you can only manage to grunt out a short, “Thankfully, I am,” before increasing your pace so you can get all this stuff to your car as quickly as possible.

“Hey, wait!” Joshua calls out from behind you, and you almost whine because your arms are killing you and you aren’t sure how much more of this you can handle. “Do you need help? I can—”

He’s cut off by the sound of your phone slipping from your pocket and crashing to the ground. “Shit,” you whimper under your breath as you try to balance all the papers on one hand while crouching down to pick up your phone with the other. You’re wobbling under all the weight, and you have half a mind to give up right here and now but then a larger hand is pushing itself into your vision.

“Here,” he says, quickly turning over the device to check for any cracks on the scene. In that fraction of a moment, your phone turns on and flashes your very bright and very embarrassing lock screen. Your face burns as you snatch the phone from his hands and tuck it back into your pocket. “Is that Percy Jackson?”

Adjusting the papers in your hand, you shuffle your feet and start walking toward the exit. Joshua follows, as expected. “Uh, yeah—I know it’s embarrassing but—”

“Uh, you did not just say that,” Joshua scoffs, and when you catch the oddly offended look on his face, your annoyance dissipates for a moment. “Percy Jackson is not embarrassing. Those books were like the defining character of my pre-teens.”

You chew on your lip, wondering how you should respond to this. “That’s cool. I used to like the stories too …”

“Seems like you still do, considering it’s like, your lock screen and all.”

“Look, I just have it ‘cause it looks cool,” you tell him bashfully, speeding up the pace of your steps in hopes that it’ll bring this conversation to end faster.

“Uh yeah, sure. Totally believe you.”

“I’m serious,” you huff. “I liked the books ages ago, but now I’m only interested in Greek mythology. It just so happens that the best art of Greek gods comes from Percy Jackson fan artists.”

“Sure. sure,” Joshua says blankly with a smirk teasing at his lips. “Again, totally believe you.” You don’t know why his subtle teasing has you gripping onto your papers so tightly, why it has you gritting your teeth together. And then you remember who this is and it all makes sense.

Joshua is playful and lighthearted, but he is still the Prince, after all.

Your sixth week at the castle, and you’re nearing the halfway mark for your project’s timeline. You’ve spent the past week working on getting some stone benches built into the courtyard, and just this morning you sent in an order to get some plaques engraved.

Mr. Park stopped by when you were checking out your progress earlier, glancing at the pathways and the nearly completed seating. He didn’t say anything, simply nodding and walking along, and you figure that that’s the best you’ll get from him.

Your day goes by fine, for the most part after that. When you take your lunch break at the cafeteria, Seokmin tags along and you’re pleased that for once, you won’t have to eat alone. He has to leave soon after though—apparently Jihoon called for his help, and so you’re left to take care of this afternoon’s work by yourself.

Not that you mind—people let you be in the castle, and it’s actually quite nice for getting work done. When you return to 77, it’s only occupied by Mr. Park who, as always, pays no mind to you. Taking a look at your schedule, you aren’t sure if you feel like smiling or frowning when you see your next activity lined up.

Visiting the greenhouse.

There’s an odd feeling that blooms in your stomach as you walk there. You haven’t been to this side of this castle yet, partly because you don’t need to, but mostly because you don’t want to.

It’s when you leave the walls and take your way out to the Northeastern gardens of the palace that the pathways start ringing bells in your head. The familiar green bushes that you remember your mother tending to. The fields of daffodils, and the little built in canals that lead toward the row of greenhouses—it’s all flooding back to you, and you can’t figure out if you like it or not.

When you first came to the castle, you figured that you could avoid confronting the remnants of your past, but you should’ve known that everything eventually goes full circle.

Which is how you find yourself standing in front of the greenhouse where everything—your life, your mother’s life, all of it—ended on that day over ten long years ago.

Taking a deep breath, you go up to the door of the largest greenhouse ,tentatively tapping on the blurry glass before pushing it open. Peeking inside, you’re met with the familiar sight of flora arranged in neat lines of soil beds.

As you step in, the air is moist and stuffy—when you inhale, you’re reminded of those early Saturday mornings where you sat by your mother’s desk and watched her tend to the plants. The humidity was usually uncomfortable, but you learned to love it. Right now, you learn how much you missed it.

“Can I help you?” a gruff voice interrupts your thoughts, and you whip your head around to find an elderly woman glaring up at you.

“Hi, I called earlier and you said I could take some of the hyacinths. I just wanted to ask which greenhouse they’d be in because—”

“31C,” she says bluntly, immediately turning back around to tend to whatever she was doing earlier.

You watch her for a few seconds blankly, before snapping out of your haze, “O-okay, thank you.” Pursing your lips, you let your head hang low as you start walking toward the door.

“That damned slut,” the woman mutters quietly. You don’t think you want to hear it, but you continue to listen anyway. “Thinks she can just send her daughter over and—”

“And?”

You don’t think you’ve ever been more happy to hear Joshua’s voice.

Looking up, he’s just entered through the entrance you were about to exit through, and while you would usually mull over the possible reasons he would be here, you’re far more focused on watching the bewildered look on this woman’s face

“Nothing sir!” she replies quickly, back straightened as she presses her hands behind her back. 

“Good to hear,” he says simply. You watch from the side as Joshua gives her a look that you can’t really gauge before turning to you with a brighter look on his face. “Seokmin told me I would find you here?”

“I—yeah, he was right.”

“Well I can see that Sunshine,” Joshua chuckles and waves your hand in a gesture to follow him. You don’t have any other choice than to follow him out the greenhouse and into the much freer, lighter air. “What’re you doing here anyways?” he asks when you start finding your way to 31C.

“I need to look at some flowers.” Joshua asks you quite a bit about the courtyard, and although you don’t really get it, you’ve learned that it’s easier to just reply to his questions honestly than try to avoid them.

“For the courtyard?” he piques as you finally find the smaller greenhouse, opening the door to thankfully find it empty of anyone else.

Your gaze lands on a bed of hyacinths as you reply, “What else?”

“Okay, you need to stop answering all of my questions like I’m stupid.”

Huffing, you pull up a pot from under the bed and fill it up with soil before digging your hands into the dirt around one of the hyacinth plants. Your fingers search under the earth before feeling against the roots and carefully pulling out the plant.

“Maybe stop asking stupid questions then,” you suggest.

“Seeing as you think I’m dumb … do you want to tutor me?”

“What?” you deadpan, looking up at him with your hands still in the dirt. “Why?”

“I mean like, you’re smart and all, plus we get along—”

You click your tongue, finally pulling the plant out of the soil and pressing it into the pot. “Not so sure about that second part.”

“Okay well we have some shared interests and stuff—”

“Like?” you counter, walking over to a sink so you can wash the excess soil off.

“Percy Jackson. Greek mythology?”

Your ears perk up at that. “You like Greek mythology?”

“Yes! See! That’s like, already two common interests, Sunshine.”

“More like only two. And one of them is a book series I haven’t read in about nine years so I’m not even sure it counts,” you rebut.

“Oh no, it definitely counts,” Joshua counters, watching you pick up the flower pot and head towards the greenhouse exit. “Wait, we’re diverting from the point here.”

“What is the point again?”

“You need to tutor me!” he whines as he follows behind you, up the pathway back to the castle.

“I need to? Uh, sorry, but I don’t think tutoring the Prince is under my job description.”

“This is a different job though!”

You knit your eyebrows together. “Am I getting paid?”

“You might,” Joshua smirks. “I’ll pay you by the hour.”

Pondering, you chew on the inside of your cheek, before you finally respond, “How much are we talking?”

Joshua grins, shaking his head. “Should’ve known money was the way to your heart Sunshine.”

“Money is not the way to my heart. It’s just the way to get me to tutor you. Don’t mix those two up.”

“Don’t worry Sunshine, I wish you all the best in finding your sugar daddy husband eventually.”

Glaring, you chastise him. “Joshua!”

“Why did you ask me to do this again?” you ask, stepping into the room Joshua has just led you to. It’s near the Royal Residence Quart of the castle, and you’re a bit on edge. Joshua assured you earlier that no one would question why you of all people would be here with him, but you’ve also noticed that the boy can be a bit distant from reality.

“Because,” Joshua starts, watching you look around the room (it is a very nice room; bookshelves line the walls and there’s a grand desk in the middle, a rolling chalkboard on one end and a vintage map on another rolling board scattered off to another end). “I don’t like the royal tutor they have, and you’re smart,” he says casually.

“You can’t ask for another one?” you murmur, raising a brow as he moves to the desk and hands you a folder.

“I could, but my mother would get upset if I keep running through them. I’ve changed my tutors far too many times by now.”

“Ah,” you say dryly. “The extreme difficulties of the royalty. How unfortunate.”

“Sunshine,” Joshua grins, ignoring your snarky comment. “Can you at least pretend you want to be here?”

“Um, I’ll think about it,” you reply honestly, pursing your lips together as you glance at his chalkboard which has a list of things he needs to go over. “What is it that you need help on?”

“Well I’m good at math and stuff but Literature and Chemistry are quite literally killing me,” Joshua says with a sigh, sitting down at his desk.

“Literature?” you ask with narrowed eyes. “You’re the Prince—isn’t Literature supposed to be like, I don’t know, your forte?”

“Who told you that?” Joshua asks with a pout, pulling up a packet of papers and letting it down on his desk with a thud.

“I don’t know, I guess I just assumed they’d be having you read Machiavelli or something like that from the age of two.”

Joshua scoffs, holding up the book so you can read out the title. Oh, it’s The Waste Land. “Okay I get that this is a kingdom and all but seriously, who even uses Machiavellianism anymore? That’s from like six hundred years ago.”

“Less than that,” you correct, but shrug anyways and sit down at the chair on the other side of his desk. “But whatever, you need help with The Waste Land?”

“I mean, yeah I’ve read it a bunch but I just never get it and my mom is obsessed with it for some reason and I really don’t want her to make me sit through another read of it so I really need to write up something good on it that will satisfy my Literature instructor and my mom so I can get it out of the way.”

“A paper?”

“Yeah, you know: analyzing themes and stuff.”

“Okay I know what a paper is,” you snap and Joshua rolls his eyes.

“Look now you’re just picking fights over everything I say. Just relax and—”

“I am relaxed,” you huff, but the tension in your shoulders says otherwise. To be honest, you’re still not sure why Joshua decided to choose you of all people, as if you haven’t made it clear multiple times that you weren’t his biggest fan.

You can respect the effort, you guess, but the way he seems so unbothered by your snarkiness is getting a little bit irritating.

“Whatever you say Sunshine,” Joshua says with a shrug, turning the packet and handing it to you. The poem is littered with annotations, underlines, and highlighter marks all over, and you squint for a moment trying to remind yourself of what you remember from the last time you looked at the work. “You read it before? The Waste Land?”

“Uh, yeah, ages ago though. Like back in high school,” murmur, flipping through the pages to jog your memory.

“Why were you reading The Waste Land in high school? Seems like too much, no?”

“Well not everyone was granted the freedom to do as they please with whoever they please,” you tell him, eyes flickering between Joshua’s curious face and the packet in front of you.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Joshua asks, and his voice is slightly whiny.

“It means that people didn’t want to talk to me so I had to spend my time reading. Even if it was ‘too much,’ or whatever you said.”

“Oh,” Joshua’s voice is quiet. See, you remind yourself, clouded from reality is what Joshua is. “Well I—”

“Forget it. I think I’m going to have to go home and reread The Waste Land if you want me to be of any help. What else do you have to work on, or do you just want to do Chemistry?”

“Uh, sure we can move onto Chemistry,” Joshua replies hastily, tucking the paper back into his folder haphazardly before shoving it into a drawer and pulling out a much thicker notebook. “I kinda need help with a lot of it. Like—I’m sorry I just don’t get it—what the hell is an electrophile and a nucleophiles and why the hell I need to know them for alkanes and—”

“Slow down,” you say, sticking your hand out. You grab the notebook from his desk and skip over the contents before looking back up. “If you want me to do this for you, we’re going to have to start from the basics, okay?”

Joshua gives you a look which tells you he doesn’t think he needs to do that, but you open the notebook to a new page, pulling out a pen. Begrudgingly, he nods and leans his head in to see what you’re writing.

He’s oddly compliant when you ask him to be, despite his jumpy and bubbly personality, and for a fraction of a second, you wonder about his potential. Quickly, you push that thought out of your mind.

It’s late afternoon when you reach the courtyard, smiling at the progress. You told the workers to get started on digging up the pond this morning, and you’re pleased to see that there’s already a large dugout in the century.

“Good work!” you chirp to Jungho, the contractor you talked to over the phone. He seemed nice enough over the phone, but you soon realized within the first time that you two met in person that he was just as standoff-ish as the rest. “But we’re going to need to get the insides patted down and compressed so when we put the water in, the soil won’t just soak it up,” you try to tell him casually.

Jungho points his thumb behind him at some of his men. “Yeah we have a guy for that,” he says gruffly, not even meeting your gaze.

“Thanks … maybe have it finished within a week?”

“Okay. Anything else?” Jungho looks around awkwardly, before adding. “Want us to get the water in there too? Then we can get outta … outta your hair and stuff and don’t have to keep coming back.”

“Uh, no—there’s some lining I want to do with the pond, and I’ve got to do that before there’s water in it. But it’s something I want to do myself, so you can just take care of compressing the soil and I’ll take it from there.”

Jungho gives you a weird look but you brush it off. “Alright. We’ll have it finished by tomorrow,” he finalizes, and with that he turns on his heels and walks back to his workers who you can tell were watching him from the corner of their vision.

“Why are those guys looking at you like that?”

You whip your head around, seeing Joshua standing just a few meters away from you on the pathway coming in from the East entrance. He glances around and finds a marble bench that’s just been made, sitting on the edge casually.

“Joshua, you’ve seen people look at me like that before and I think you know exactly why,” you mutter, walking over to where he sits. Joshua doesn’t respond and instead averts his gaze to the ground.

There’s a stray kitten bouncing around at his feet, and he’s quick to drop to his knees on the pathway and engulf her in his large hands. It would be an endearing sight, you think. Sorta, you guess.

“Whatever. You’re still coming in on Sunday right? My instructor prepared this stupid Chemistry exam for me on Tuesdays and I know you can’t help out on Mondays so I kind of really need you to help me on Sunday so I can prep. So please, please, please—”

“You know I’m gonna come in, so you don’t have to pester me so much about it,” you say with a sigh, putting your folder down and crouching on the ground so you can pet the kitten. She’s cute, with wide slanted eyes and soft brown fur, the wet kitten licks feeling warm against your palm.

“But you put up with it, don’t you?” You roll your eyes but Joshua still grins when you don’t disagree.

“I don’t understand you,” you mutter, truthfully speaking your mind as the kitten rolls around in Joshua’s lap. You smile without thinking, and Joshua carefully watches your usually taut face unravel in front of him.

“Are you kidding me? I’m literally an open book. You know Sunshine, you can find my whole life on Wikipedia.”

You giggle. You fucking giggle at that, and it’s hard to tell who is more surprised between the two of you. “You know that’s not what I meant,” you murmur, struggling to hold back another laugh, the kitten jumping out of his lap to play around on the ground under the gentle hands of you and Joshua.

“Not that I would know. You think I’m stupid anyways.”

“What? No I don’t.”

“Oh my god, please don’t even try to counter that. When I told you I didn’t know why helium was named helium, you looked at me like I was the dumbest person to ever live.”

“Okay that’s only because you say you like Greek mythology! How could you not put that together—it’s so obvious! Helium and Helios sound totally alike, and everyone knows helium is like, one of the most abundant elements in the sun.”

“Maybe you know that. You’re also insanely smart,” Joshua counters.

“Whatever you say. But for the record, I don’t think you’re stupid. Maybe a little dense, but that’s it.”

Joshua pouts. “Aren’t those basically the same thing?” You know he’s only being playful, but something about the way he says it makes you think twice. He’s being sweet. So sweet, it feels almost bitter.

“No. You have a smart head, Joshua. Honest. I think you just gotta learn how to use it,” you tell him, more softly this time.

“Thanks Sunshine,” he replies gruffly and you frown, realizing that your attempts to make him feel better haven’t quite worked.

“I’m serious. What? You don’t think I’m serious?” Joshua shakes his head, and you roll your eyes when you pick up the kitten yourself and pull her into your lap.

“You’re mean. So no, I don’t think you’re being serious.”

You gasp, using the hand that isn’t playing with the kitten to place it over your chest dramatically. “I am not mean. I’m just honest. I’m being honest right now.”

“Whatever,” Joshua quips, turning his nose and looking away pettily.

“Okay, are you actually upset?” you groan, cradling the kitten up to your chest. You aren’t sure if you’re more annoyed because you can’t tell if Joshua is upset, or because you might be the reason he’s upset.

“Who knows. Not that you would care.”

“I obviously care, because I’m asking,” you deadpan, letting the kitten roll around in your arms, letting out a squeak of surprise when one of its claws gets caught in the belt of your robe, making a tear in the silk.

Joshua gives you a funny look when he says, “You can be quite pestering when you want to.”

“Congratulations! You now know how I feel.”

“See what I mean! You’re mean. I want the kitten back.”

You clutch the little close to your chest and nuzzle your face into her neck. “No can do. I’m afraid she’s mine until you admit you know I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“Oh my god, is this how it feels when I annoy you?” Joshua grumbles, throwing his head back. “Remind me to never pester you again. Ever.”

“Self awareness is great and all, but like I said, you’re not getting her until you admit it.”

“Fine. I don’t think you think I’m stupid. Happy?”

You hum and shake your head. “Mm, no. Gotta sound more convincing.”

Joshua knits his eyebrows together. “If you’re so insistent on this, then I guess it must be true. I don’t think you think I’m stupid,” he repeats, but his tone is gentler this time.

“Good work.”

Joshua stands tall on a hill. His broad shoulders are sharp with his straightened back and taught jaw. The sky is orange and you watch him from below, the clouds moving slowly above his head in the background.

He’s looking out at something, but you can’t quite tell what. It’s off in the distance, but his eyes are dilated and unwavering for a few long moments.

Wind whistles in your ear, and then the sky grows brighter and brighter until it’s no longer orange and suddenly turning yellow and then white. So white that it hinders your vision and you’re wincing through the light until you realize Joshua is not on the hill anymore.

You look around frantically to no avail—you can’t see anything but white with black spots in your vision and you feel like you’re going blind. And you want to scream but when you open your mouth no sound comes and the blowing of wind grows louder and louder until it sounds like you’re at the beach.

Looking around, you see your legs knee deep in ocean water and you’re no longer hearing the rampage of wind and instead the crashing of waves against rocks. There isn’t a hill anymore, there’s a cliff, but still no sight of Joshua.

It’s still so bright, so bright and you close your eyes tightly again until you feel a shade fall over your figure. A gasp escapes your lips when you see what’s above you.

Wide wings, ornate with white and golden feathers, perched over Joshua’s back as he hovers above you. He’s not looking anywhere else now, only you.

His face glows and then he smiles and you close your eyes one last time but when you open them again, all you see is darkness.

You’ve never been great at remembering dreams. More often than not, you wake up with no remnants of the life you lived in your head the night before, and on the rare occasions that you do happen to recall something, it’s only just random snippets that also hardly make sense.

Last night was no different, although you do wake up with an uneasy feeling, not because of what you dreamed about—you don’t remember that—but because you know you dreamed about Joshua. It’s just the wake up call you need to tell yourself that maybe, just maybe, you’re spending more time with him than you should.

It’s a Saturday morning as you trudge out of bed and to the kitchen, trying to settle the weird feelings that course through your veins when you see your mother brewing a pot of tea. “How’d you sleep?” she asks, not looking up from the boiling water.

Shrugging as you grab a home-grown orange, you respond, “Well enough.”

“Can’t believe they have you going to the palace on the weekends too … I never had to work on Saturdays or Sundays.”

You wonder how she brings up her time at the castle so casually—you don’t know if you’ll ever understand her. “I really don’t have to—I can work on my own schedule basically whenever, as long as I get the courtyard finished by the end of three months.”

“And how’s that going?”

“Behind schedule. Obviously. That’s why I’m heading in again.”

Your mother smiles and walks over, ruffling your hair. “I’m glad you’re working hard on this—I can tell you’re enjoying it, as much as you didn’t want to go there.”

“It’s nice, I guess. I get to be creative, and get paid. Really, getting the money is all I care about,” you tell her casually, taking the peel off the orange and popping a piece into your mouth.

“You don’t talk about it much, but I’m assuming people don’t give you that hard of a time? You always come home fine.”

They do, it just doesn’t happen to be anything you’re not used to. Your mind flashes to Joshua and Seokmin for a moment, and you’re once again reminded of the unnerving fact that you did dream about the former, and you can’t even remember what it was about. “Things are fine.”

You’re three tutoring sessions in with Joshua, and it’s finally the day that you pull out your own copy of The Waste Land. “Oh thank god,” he says with a breath of relief when he sees it. “This paper has been bugging me forever—if we didn’t get started on it soon I might’ve combust.”

“I appreciate the vivid imagery,” you say dryly, “but I really did not need to picture that in my head.”

“Sorry,” Joshua says with a shrug as you sit across from him. “So what’re we gonna do today, Sunshine?”

“Hmm, get through the first part hopefully. We can read it back and forth and talk about it together, so you can take notes. It might be easier that way, so you can get all your thoughts and ideas out, and then it’ll be easier for you to write that paper.”

“Sounds boring.”

“I guess I’ll just pack my stuff and—”

“Okay! Okay! I was just joking. Let’s start, please,” he complies easily, and you smirk as you sit back down.

“Good to hear. Read this part.”

You’re around an hour and a half into the lesson, still working through the first part as Joshua frowns when you finish another stanza.

“Do we have to keep going?” he whines.

“Yes we do. Let’s work with this part now. Read it out for me,” you instruct, pointing out a stanza on your own paper.

“Why—” You give him a look. “—okay fine.”

‘You gave me hyacinths first a year ago;‘They called me the hyacinth girl.’—Yet when we came back, late, from the Hyacinth garden,Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could notSpeak, and my eyes failed, I was neitherLiving nor dead, and I knew nothing,Looking into the heart of light, the silence.Oed’ und leer das Meer.

When he’s done, Joshua looks up at you blankly. “If I’m being honest, I have zero clue what this means.”

You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “You’ve said that every time you read a new section, but I know that’s not true, because you literally always come up with something.”

Joshua scrunches up his face and slaps his hands to his cheeks in frustration. “But now I’m being serious! This is making no sense to me—I hate Literature, okay? My brain is dead right now and I don’t think I can do any more Sunshine.”

“We’ve been doing this for less than two hours,” you say bluntly. “Look—you said you like Greek mythology right? Try and draw some connections. Maybe that’ll make this more enjoyable.”

“I hardly think T.S. Elliot could produce anything I enjoy,” Joshua huffs as he tilts the page so he can read it better, “But fine. I still don’t get what about this has anything to do with mytho—oh!”

“Finally! You get it?”

“Hyacinthus!” You nod eagerly, gesturing your hands to tell him to go on. “Uh, it was that story with Apollo. Shit, what was the story again?” He looks up and taps at his chin, but when you open your mouth to help him out, Joshua sticks a hand in front of your face and shakes his head. “No wait, I remember. The one where they were in love but Apollo accidentally killed him when they were playing a game!”

“You’re right. The blood of Hyacinthus was eventually turned into flowers by Apollo to honor his death or something like that. In the context of this poem … the giver of the hyacinth flower is almost like a sign of—”

Joshua snaps his fingers in the air and grins. “Forgiveness!”

“Well, not exactly giving forgiveness, but asking for it.”

“Kind of like … saying you’re sorry?” Joshua smiles brighter when you nod. “Holy shit, maybe I do enjoy T.S. Elliot.”

You roll your eyes and point at his notebook and pen. “Good, now write that down. You are going to have to write about this, remember?”

Joshua pouts, but picks up the pen nevertheless. “Whatever you say Sunshine.”

“Joshua told me to tell you that he thinks T.S. Elliot sucks,” Seokmin says, coming up to you in the cafeteria as you polish off your own tray. It’s a large and grand area—an old ballroom that turned into a commonplace for the workers.

Large mirrors plate the walls, and across from you, you can watch Seokmin’s reflection as he sits down next to you. Rolling your eyes, you turn to look at him, “He’s only saying that because I told him to write the paper himself.”

Seokmin furrows his eyebrows as he places a white box, a little larger than the size of your hand, on the table. Glancing around, you catch people in the mirror watching you with wavering gazes before turning away when they find you looking at them.

Huff lightly, you turn your attention back to Seokmin. “What’s this?”

“Joshua told me to give it to you.”

That’s new. Tentatively, you lift the lid a little to peek inside, only finding a haphazard mess of stuffing paper with something purple concealed underneath. “Would it be a smart decision to open it right now?”

“Oh my gosh, it’s not an explosive or anything.”

“You don’t know that!”

Seokmin rolls his eyes himself this time. “Yes I do. I packed it.”

“Ugh, even worse. I’m not opening it if you’re around. That’s embarrassing.”

“Is not! I think that you should—” Seokmin is cut off by the sound of his own phone ringing, cursing under his breath when he sees the caller ID. For a moment, you consider peering over and taking a look, but Seokmin stands up too quickly. “I gotta go for a second. I’ll catch you before you leave!” he calls out when he’s already pushing his chair in and rushing off into the distance.

You laugh at his hurry, wondering what could possibly ensue such nervousness from the boy, but you quickly remind yourself that this is Seokmin and he gets the jitters when he even has to think about being around Mr. Park for more than twenty minutes.

Soon, you start to clean up your area yourself, putting your trays away and throwing away your trash in the weirdly fancy bins they have scattered around the hall. As your lunch break nears its end, you grab the oddly light box, your phone, and make your way back to 77.

The room is empty, safe for Jihoon who’s got his head buried in his laptop, and you think it’s a good time to check what’s inside. If it is an explosive, you’ll just have to apologize to Jihoon in the afterlife.

Opening the lid, those same, crumpled papers lay on top, but this time you notice a little white card in the middle. Pursing your lips, your eyes flicker to your side to see if Jihoon’s watching (he never is, but it doesn’t hurt to check), and when your privacy is confirmed, you flip the paper over.

There’s a message written in purple pen, adorning a handwriting that you can distinctly recognize as Joshua’s.

Thank you for all the help. I really owe you one.

You aren’t quite sure what he’s talking about, and you make a mental note to ask him about it when you see him later. Right now, you rummage through the papers, hands feeling the space beneath them before they land on a smooth layer of fabric.

Confused, you pull it out, only to see it’s a ribbon, much like the one tied around your own waist. Same color, same material, same emblem, the only difference being …

You glance down at your own robes where the ribbon has a small tear at one end from where the kitten had pawed at you. You have to blink a few times to realize what Joshua’s intentions were, and when you do, you can’t help the warm smile that begrudgingly makes its way onto your face.

Quickly, you tug the ends of the ribbon around your waist and let it unravel, taking the new ribbon and tying it just as your mother taught you. It’s the same thing as the one before, yes, but this is different. This is a gift.

Donning Joshua’s (your?) ribbon, you start to clean up your desk space and tuck your old ribbon back into your bag. You forgot to tell Seokmin you’re tutoring Joshua this afternoon, so as you pack up you text him a sincere ‘thank you’ message, and let him know that you might not be able to see him before you go. You don’t get a response, which is slightly odd since Seokmin seems to always be on top of things, but you shrug it off and remind yourself that he’s busy.

Today, you make your way down the smaller halls with a little skip to your step. Joshua showed you this pathway earlier so it’d be easier to get to his study room without being seen; it’s a nice little series of corridors that are a little dimmer and narrower, but still hold the lavish feel you always get walking through the palace.

You can hear the voices of a few people, but it seems quiet, hushed, and somehow a little heated—in other words, caught up in their own world. Being in the castle for almost two months now, you’ve learned to realize what kind of situations need your caution and which ones don’t. This is the latter.

You smile to yourself, smoothing your palms over the new, not-torn silk ribbon around your waist, as you near the second entrance to his study, about to enter another hallway to the final stretch and—shit.

When you turn a corner, your heart stops.

You turn back and run down the corridor. You don’t know if Seokmin saw you, and quite frankly, you don’t care.

It didn’t take you more than a second to put two and two together and suddenly you’re pushed back into your nine year old body—you don’t really know what’s happening or why it’s happening, all you know is that it hurts.

You’re going to have to apologize to Joshua for flaking on him. Surely he’ll understand that you were just a little bit upset by the sight you had to see.

After all, you did just witness Seokmin, quite literally your only real friend in this damn castle, speaking to Advisor Lee, the man who tore your mother’s life down. And now is when everything starts to click, because you realize that Seokmin is Advisor Lee’s son.

Of course he was close with Joshua—he probably grew up on these very castle grounds. Of course they attended the same classes—his father was the King’s advisor and cousin.

It makes sense now, and in your bleary haze as you make your way back to 77, you’re not sure what to do. You rush past a few other staff members murmuring under their breath when they see you, and you usually wouldn’t be bothered by the sight but now you remember that this is the first time you’ve cried since you got here, and it’s all because of that man who started this all in the first place.

As you lock yourself in one of the staff bathrooms, you catch your disheveled appearance and furiously wipe at your cheeks. Fuck. You shouldn’t be crying. You can’t be crying over this, because god knows you did not spend years thickening your skin for it to be cut open like this.

You should’ve known. Should’ve fucking known.

You try to stop your tears, telling yourself that they’re all the same. That you shouldn’t have expected anything more from these people, that you should’ve picked up on how Seokmin was definitely someone important, that you should’ve never fallen for his and Joshua’s sweet games.

“Shit,” you gasp out as a sob rips from your throat, and you clutch the side of the sink as uneasiness bubbles up in your stomach and spreads through your limbs until you’re trembling.

Maybe you let him get so close because you thought he saw you for something else. Maybe you believed that he saw you as more than a pity project. More than someone who was defined by their past.

Joshua and Seokmin—they knew. They knew everything this whole damn time.

And now you’re angry—you’re so fucking angry. Tugging at your hair, ripping up your clothes, and thrashing your limbs around kind of angry. The kind of anger that poisons your bones and makes your body ache until you can’t take it anymore. The kind of anger that wraps its hand around your throat and squeezes the air out of you until you can do nothing but relent. The kind of anger that has you looking at yourself in the mirror and thinking, what the fuck.

The worst thing is you can’t even be mad at him. You want to be mad at him and you want to be mad at Joshua. You want to have the will to go up to them and slap the smiles off their faces because how dare Seokmin be the own flesh and blood of Advisor Lee, and how dare Joshua know and not have the guts to tell you.

Because after everything, Seokmin and Joshua were your friends and—fuck—they were some damn good friends. Your best friends, maybe, if you ever had the liberty to even know what that means.

And it wasn’t because they were overly nice, or excessively cheery, or because Seokim was always grinning and Joshua was always smirking, but because when they talked to you, they were talking to you, and not some shell of your past.

Finally, now, when you press your face into your hands as your last attempt to calm yourself down, you feel like you can breathe. You’re not sure where your head is at, and something tells you that it’s gonna take a damn long time to figure it out.

You’re a little lost.

You were just trying to get to the South end entrance of the courtyard but you must have taken a wrong turn or something because you’re walking down a corridor you’ve quite literally never seen before. It’s similar to the hallways of the rest of the palace, but it’s slightly taller and a bit more narrow, and the workers walking through wear faces that you aren’t familiar with. You’re a little nervous about where your feet are taking you, and you consider just turning around and retracing your steps when you hear a voice.

Seokmin’s voice is loud when he calls your name, and you press your lips together tightly when it rings in your ears. “What are you doing here? You usually don’t come down to the South e—” he starts to say when walks up to you from a corridor to your left.

“Nothing,” you reply briskly, turning on your heel so your back is pretty much facing him. “I was just leaving actually.”

“What—hey! Slow down! Where’re you going?”

“77,” you mutter under your breath as you speed up your pace.

“Slow down!”

You don’t relent. “Seokmin, don’t you have stuff to do right now instead of following me around?” You can’t see the look on his face, but you can only imagine it’s one of defeat.

“I—” his voice is quieter this time, “Okay.”

The footsteps that were one following you die out, and as you browse the corners of your vision, you conclude that he’s finally left you alone. You should feel relieved—happy that he’s not bothering you now—but sometimes uneasy churns inside of you, and you aren’t sure what it is.

The rest of your day goes as it usually does in a palace. You tend to your work and as it hits late afternoon, you start making your way to Joshua’s study. Once again, you’re not sure where your head is at.

“Is everything alright?” Joshua asks you the second you walk in. “Seokmin told me you looked upset and wouldn’t talk to him so I—”

You inhale deeply before, putting your hands up in a stopping motion. “I can’t tutor you anymore.”

Joshua looks at you weirdly. “What, why?”

“Or talk to you,” you add.

“What—”

“Just—just don’t talk to me. Or ask me to tutor you. Or ask for my help, or ask to help me—you know what just like—I dunno, stay away from me.”

“Sunshine, where is this coming from?” Joshua pinches the bridge of his nose, and you don’t think he’s understanding the weight of his words.

“Why do you even talk to me?” you snap. “Like seriously, if you can bother any worker in the castle, why does it have to be me?”

Hurt flashes in Joshua’s face for hardly a second before he frowns deeply. “I—what’s going on?”

“Do you and Seokmin think this is funny? Being nice to me like—” You throw your hands in the air. “—like I’m some kind of joke?”

“What? No, Sunshine, what are you even talking about?”

“I know who Seokmin’s dad is.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” you scoff. “So if Seokmin still wants to know why I don’t feel like talking to him, maybe consider telling him that I’m not interested in being around someone whose father is literally the reason me and my mom’s lives have been so fucked up.”

Joshua winces at the last statement. You’ve been irritated with him, annoyed with him, and all that petty stuff, sure, but this is different.

“Seokmin isn’t like that, okay? He isn’t—you know—like that.”

“And how would you know?” you snap. “Prince Joshua, what do you know about having people be, quote unquote, above you? You have everything in front of you, and when people look at you and Seokmin it’s not ‘cause of some fucked up scandal which pinned your mom as the kingdom’s slut of the century, it’s ‘cause they literally bow down to your presence and—”

Something tells you to stop yourself. Maybe it’s the fact that you know you’re not actually angry at them. Maybe it’s the fact that you’re so fucking tired of being angry all the time that you can’t take it anymore. Maybe it’s the fact that when you finally look him in the eye, Joshua looks sad.

“I’m sorry,” he finally says meekly. “Seokmin should—we should’ve let you know earlier. I promise we didn’t be your friend just ‘cause of that,” he rambles. “I mean obviously we knew about it but we didn’t wanna bring it up because everyone was bringing it up and—I’m sorry. You know Seokmin isn’t like that.”

“And you?” you quip, but you know your retorts hold no weight. “How do I know you aren’t like—like that.”

Joshua falters and you watch him gulp. He looks tired and his lips are red from how hard he’s been chewing on them as you speak. “Y-you know,” his voice is quiet, “You know I’m not.”

You have your answer before you even have to think about it, but you pause for a few moments, waiting to respond. All that comes out is a shallow breath as you look down and squeeze your eyes shut. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I just—” You sigh weakly. “I don’t know. I don’t know anymore.” Joshua doesn’t respond—he knows you’re thinking.

You wonder what to do with yourself. You’re not angry. Not sad either. Uneasy? Maybe. It’s the uncertainty of it all. You don’t understand why you’re not mad, and you don’t understand why you want to forgive him so easily, but you’re starting to realize that you should stop trying to understand the things that might never make sense.

Finally, you nod. “It’s fine.”

“Sorry again. I guess we didn’t wanna make that whole thing all about you. Because like, you’re you, and whatever happened is separate.”

You purse your lips and nod. “Thank you.”

“Was that sarcasm?”

You glare at him. “Dipshit, no it wasn’t!”

“I’m taking this as a sign that you’re feeling better. Am I correct?”

You bite back a smile and shrug. “I guess.”

“Cool, ‘cause I think you’d like to know that my mom stopped by the courtyard the other day.”

“Oh yeah? What’d she say? This is all for her isn’t it—hopefully she liked it.”

“Yeah no, she said it was great. She thought the patterns of the pathway were cool and so she asked me if I could figure out why they were designed like that and I said no. By the way, why did you design them like that?”

“There’s this song I like. It’s called Isohel, and when I first heard it, I liked it a lot,” you explain. “Searched up what it means and stuff and then a few weeks later I was taking some filler class for the credits and my professor goes on some tangent about god-knows-what, and somehow he brings up pictures of an isohel map. An isohel—it’s basically a line which maps out the places that have the same duration of sunshine. Pretty cool, I think.”

“Is that what the pathways are? Are they—what is it—an isohel?”

“Mhm. On an isohel map, they’re not always just lines—they come around full circle sometimes so it looks like these funky, squiggly ovals sometimes,” you ramble. “So I took one of those circle-ish things and broke it up and pieced it together like a pathway.”

“That’s really smart.” Joshua pauses. “You’re really smart.”

It’s not the first time someone’s told you that. Fuck, it’s not even the first time Joshua’s told you that, but it feels different now. He means it, you know it in your bones.

“I-I dunno,” you stammer. “I guess. It just relates to the theme of the sun. My mom taught me about it when I was younger—I loved the sun.”

“So that’s what the theme of your courtyard is? Me and Seokmin have been betting on that for ages.”

You scoff, “You guys bet on that? Seriously, do you have nothing better to do with your time?”

“Clearly not!” he shoots back, causing you to laugh. “Are you really feeling better now?” Joshua asks sincerely, and when you smile and nod, he grins. “Hey, I just realized you talked to me about your feelings—”

“Don’t mention it,” you snap gruffly, crossing your arms over your chest.

Joshua clicks his tongue and chuckles. “There’s the Sunshine I know.”

It’s the next day when you walk into 77. Jihoon’s desk is empty, Mr. Park is just about to leave as you enter and you bow to him quickly as you settle in your desk. Seokmin is in the corner watering the yarrows, seeming to not have noticed you yet.

You watch him closely, smiling softly when you notice he stops before he can overwater them. Quietly, you set your stuff down and Seokmin begins to talk. “Oh, Jihoon, Mr. Park was just looking for you—oh,” he cuts himself flat when he turns around and sees you.

You’re not sure what to do, because Joshua didn’t exactly tell you if he told Seokmin about your conversation and what not, but the look on Seokmin’s face is telling you that he’s just a little behind on the news.

“Hey,” you say casually, throwing a hand up to wave at him as you set your bag down on your desk. Seokmin opens his mouth and then closes it a few times, as if he’s searching for the right words but they don’t quite come out for a few moments.

“Joshua told me that, uh, you know that—” He pauses and glances at you, trying to watch for any hints of anger on your face, but none comes.

“Don’t worry about it,” you say with a shrug, and Seokmin has to blink twice because he’s not sure he heard you correctly at all.

“W-what?”

You narrow your eyes at him. “I said don’t worry about it,” you state again, and then add more softly, “You’re not your father. I get it.” You get it more than anyone. “Anyways, did you get the workers to start planting the hyacinths?”

Seokmin shakes his head once to snap himself back into reality and then shakes his head again a second time. “Wait no, I mean—wait, yes! I mean yes! I did do that—I should go remind them to get on that,” he rambles quickly, clearly a little flustered.

You chuckle. “It’s good to see you’ve been watering the yarrows properly now. Mr. Park finally beat it into you?”

“Y-yeah I guess. I’ve been getting better at remembering them all,” he tells you, starting to fall into a more casual tone. It’s normal, you think. Nice and normal. Nice and normal and just what you need.

“What are you doing here?”

When you turn around with your bag slung over your shoulder, you’re surprised to see Joshua. “Um, working?”

“It’s a Saturday night,” he states, lips pinched together in a funny expression, like he can’t figure you out.

“I think I know that,” you chuckle. “I didn’t know if I could come in on Monday—I need to stop by the university campus for something—so I just came in today to take care of some stuff.”

“You’re a dedicated worker huh … you should just work here forever—the pay is great.”

“Mm, I’m not sure about that,” you say honestly as you look him up and down. It strikes you now that Prince Joshua truly is a handsome man. Dark velvety robes that are even more grand than the ones you’re used to seeing on him, well fit dress pants against his legs and shiny leather shoes that seem to fit his image perfectly. “Anyways, I heard there’s a ball tonight? You’re not going?”

Joshua shrugs as he turns around and starts walking, waving you over to follow him. “C’mon follow me.” You contemplate your choices before telling yourself, what’s the worst that could happen, scurrying on after him. “I left—it got boring, so I got about twenty-five minutes before someone calls me and asks me to come back. My bets are on it being Seokmin ‘cause he’ll get bored.”

You snort at that as the familiarity of this route starts to sink in. “Hey are we going to my …”

“Yeah. Seokmin told me you finally got it named, and I want to check it out.”

“Uh, yeah,” you murmur bashfully—you hadn’t expected Joshua to be that interested in it. You walk through the empty corridors to the hallway that has the North entrance of the courtyard, and Joshua cranes his neck up to look at the golden plaque that rests above the entrance.

“Sol Invictus, huh.”

You nudge him on the side playfully. “You know what that means, Mr. Latin Genius?”

“Of course I do,” he retorts with a roll of his eyes. “Sun god, or whatever,”

“God of sun, but you were close enough I guess,” you mutter as you walk through. The courtyard looks different in the night. It’s nearly done, and as the little warm lights you had placed in intervals along the path light up the scene, you can’t help but feel overwhelming pride with how well you’ve done.

“C’mon, let’s sit here,” he says, pointing down at the circular patch of grass that surrounds the pond in the middle. Joshua sits down first and you watch him carefully before quickly sitting next to him as well.

The grass is cool under your skin, but as a comfortable silence envelopes you and Joshua, you start to think you really don’t mind.

“I think lots of people think I’m stupid or something,” Joshua finally speaks up, and some uncomfortable feeling boils in your stomach at the words. “You know, the only thing people usually compliment me on is my fencing, really. And fencing is one of those things that, if you’ve been doing it as long as I have, you sort of gotta be good at it.”

“I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“I know. Thank you.” There’s a silence as he reaches over the stone lining of the hyacinth beds, plucking a few from the shrubs.

“Joshua!” you complain. “I had those planted just last week.”

“It’s fine,” he mumbles, handing the two he plucked to you. You don’t hesitate to keep your palms open for him, his fingers brushing over the skin of your arms as he does so. You rub the smooth petals between your fingers and a thumb, bringing one close to your chest before taking the other and handing it back to Joshua.

He looks at you, eyes clearly confused, but holds it to his own chest anyways. With your hands behind you on the ground, you lean back and look up at the sky, letting your shoulders relax. The night air pinches at your skin, but the soft fabric of Joshua tuxedo is warm as it brushes next to you.

“Why’d you name this pond Eridenus?” Joshua asks, pointing at the plaque by the pebble lining which spells out the word in fancy lettering.

“You don’t know where it’s from?” you sigh, lifting your head so you can shoot him a stern look. Joshua rolls his eyes and nudges your cheek with his shoulder, motioning you to lean back down at him.

“You know I’m a rascal—I’m forgetful. Tell me what it means.”

“It’s confirmed: you’re a fake mythology fan. I’m suing the universe.” Joshua chuckles and pokes you, egging you to go on. “Do you remember the story of Phaethon?”

Joshua hums. “Uh, son of Helios. Didn’t believe that he was his son. Asked to ride his carriage but lost control and almost burned the Earth?”

You shrug. “Well that’s most of it I guess. He’s racing down to the earth and everything is chaos—rivers boiling, forests on fires, people turning to ash—and so Zeus throws his bolt at him and kills Phaethon right in the sky.”

“Kind of like the story of Icarus. But the opposite I guess. Instead of getting too close to the sun, he brings the sun too close to the earth.”

“You could put it like that. They have the same meaning, I think. But anyways, Phaethon falls out of the carriage and as he dies he falls into this river called Eridenus.”

“Oh.” Joshua’s voice is quiet as you both watch the gentle water lap back and forth in front of you. The small waves hitting the stone barriers of the pound is the only sound that permeates the night sky, besides your shared breaths and the occasional whistling of wind.

“It’s kind of like—” You.

“Don’t say it.” Joshua’s words are crisp and short, and he doesn’t look at you. You want to say the words—I’m sorry—but they get stuck in your throat and ripple through your limbs as you scoot closer to him.

“Anyways,” Joshua finally says, but the word is only followed with silence.

“I think you need to get back to the ball,” you tell him quietly, lifting your head from his shoulder. Your skin burns from where it was previously pressed against him and you silently chide yourself for letting yourself get so close.

Joshua finally turns to face you, and you’re surprised when he chuckles. “So eager to get rid of me, Sunshine?” You scoff, pushing him away gently.

“I-I just don’t want you to get in trouble!” you stutter as you push yourself off the ground, Joshua following suit.

“Aw, so you care about me?” His eyes crinkle up in that familiar way when he says it and you can’t help the childish grin that makes its way onto your face.

“More like I don’t want you to complain to me about how you got scolded!”

“Mm, sounds a lot like you care about me,” Joshua counters, returning your smile with one of his own. You roll your eyes and carefully skip in your dress toward the exit on the North end of the courtyard.

When you almost trip over your robes, Joshua catches you and his rough palm presses against the small of your back as you regain your balance, the two of you giggling together as he drops you off at 77 before heading to the ballroom.

It’s almost laughable how happy you are. Silly you for forgetting that fairytales don’t happen in real life.

The walls look brighter, the chandeliers that hang from the ceiling seem to glitter a bit more, the ground seems smoother; you enjoy walking through the castle in a way you never thought you could.

It’s a normal evening and you’re nearing the end of your time at the castle, but you choose to ignore the odd feeling you get when you think too long about leaving this place. There’s still more work to get done, and you don’t want to spend your time focusing on things that you know will only distract you.

You’re in the middle of Sol Invictus today, looking through a paper and phone as you go through some old plans and checklists, trying to figure out if there is anything you should do before you pack your bags and head towards Joshua’s study.

Just as you’re about to unclick your pen and tuck your things away and head back to 77, someone speaks to you from behind.

“A lovely courtyard we have here.” You know this voice. Everyone knows this voice.

Your blood runs cold as you turn around and face the King, neck craning down immediately as you bow down, stepping away while you hold your hands behind your back.

“G-good evening sir,” you stutter, almost tripping over the stone of your own pathways when you stand up and straighten your back. It’s your first time in years seeing him in person, and you tell yourself as your stomach churns that this was bound to happen at some point.

“Care to tell me about what you’ve got going on here?” he asks, walking around the little stone circle that surrounds Eridenus. “You’re the head of the project, is that right?”

“Yes sir,” you reply quickly, bowing again slightly when he finally goes full circle stopping next to you. His hands are behind his back as you watch him look over the almost complete fields of flowers. “I—uh—it’s called Sol Invictus,” you say. “The—”

“God of Sun.”

“Y-yes sir. Apollo and Helios,” you begin to explain. “Which is why I’ve used these flowers—they’re from one of Apollo’s love stories. They’re quite beautiful, if you ask me, and they fit the kingdom’s colors well.”

The King hums in response. “That’s interesting,” he finally tells you, looking down at Eridenus in front of you. You follow his gaze, staring down at the clear water as you feel your heart rise to your throat in anticipation. You don’t really know what you expect, but if you were preparing yourself for anything, it wasn’t the King saying, “It’s my understanding that you talk to Prince regularly, is that right?”

Your breath hitches in your throat and lodges there along with your heart. “Well, I wouldn’t say—”

“I was speaking to Mr. Park just yesterday.” Oh. “You seem to be a very smart, professional young lady, and it shows in your work.” This can’t be good. “However, I am obligated to remind you: there are boundaries within these walls between the family and its staff.”

“Of course sir. I understand.”

The King watches you carefully, and just when you think he's done, he continues. “There are guards around the castle at all times. there isn't much they miss, I’m sure you know.” This isn't good. This really isn't good.

“It's quite impressive,” you agree, thumbs pressed against each other behind your back. You hear the king take a deep breath, and you wonder if he sucked the air out of you doing so.

"I've heard the pond here is named Eridenus.”

"Y-yes sir."

"Interesting," he murmurs. "Phaeton asked for a bit more than he could handle, didn’t he?" the King chuckles but you hardly hear it over the way your heart pounds. "Let mistakes be learned from, alright?"

You feel your knuckle might buckle. Is this how your mother felt? All those years ago?

The King’s words aren’t nearly as harsh as the advisor who berated your mother, but still, your body sways—you can’t tell if it’s all in your head with all the thoughts that race through, or if it’s the sheer weight of his words that has you almost stumbling.

“It was good to meet you. I’ve enjoyed what you’ve done with this space,” he comments finally, and you step away to face him 

“The pleasure was mine, sir,” you bid, bowing as he turns and walks back to his assistants who whisk him away. You watch the King fade into the distance and disappear to the North end.

He spoke to you for a reason, and the King was right. You are smart. You are smart and professional, and tonight, you know exactly what you must do.

“We need to talk,” you state firmly, closing the door behind you in Joshua’s study. You’re supposed to tutor him tonight, and he doesn’t look up at you as he writes away in his notebook, a smirk making its way onto his face as he starts to speak.

“That’s all I get, Sunshine? No ‘hi,’ ‘hello,’ ‘how are you?’” he teases, but then he looks up at you and catches the grim look on your face and the sound of him dropping his pen echoes through the room. “What is it?”

He stands up so quickly that his chair falls down, but Joshua pays no mind to it, his hands gripping the end of his table as his eyes bore into yours. “What is it?” he asks again and this time he’s hissing it. You know he doesn’t mean to be harsh, but your heart sinks even further than you could imagine.

“Joshua,” and when you say it, your voice is meek. You shouldn’t cry over this—fuck, you hate crying, especially if it’s because of his people. You’ve done more than enough crying over them in your life—you can’t cry over any of this anymore.

“Sunshine, what’s going on? You’re scaring me,” Joshua eggs you on worriedly, moving away from his desk so he can walk over to you. One hand cups your cheek, and you’re struck by the realization that this is the most intimate he’s ever been with you.

What unfortunate circumstances, you think.

“Your father,” you say, having half a mind to push his hand away from your face, but you keep it there because you don’t think you’ll have the will to keep on talking if he’s not touching you.

“What about him?” Joshua asks hastily, grip on your jaw tightening.

“He knows, Joshua, he knows.”

“What are you talking about?” Joshua furrows his eyebrows and asks the question but there’s that voice in his head telling him that he already knows the answer.

“A guard saw us at the courtyard and—”

“We didn’t even do anything,” Joshua tries to protest and with just one look at his face, you can tell he’s trying to figure out ways to rebut whatever that stupid guard saw that night.

“Joshua, you know we can’t do anything about this,” you say exasperatedly, your voice a little louder now that you clutch the elbow of his arm that’s holding your face. “I overheard him talking to Mr. Park.”

Joshua’s eyes widen. “Mr. Park knows? What about your job? Are you going to get to finish the project? Are you—”

“Joshua,” you choke out, and for once you cannot stop your tears. “I don’t care about my goddamn project, I care about you.”

“You love that courtyard,” Joshua argues, and you wince at the way he’s still thinking about that damn courtyard. You brush his hand off of you and for a second it looks like his heart has just broken in two, but then you reach for his face and hold his cheeks with your own two hands.

His skin is smooth and supple with the light grain of stubble that itches against your palm near the underside of your jaw. “Joshua,” you whisper, and it’s now that you feel the warm drops of water hit your skin. Joshua is crying and you don’t think you’ve seen anything that saddens you more. “Don’t cry, please don’t cry,” you beg, fruitlessly wiping away his tears as he silently cries into your hands.

“Why’re you acting like this is the end?” he hiccups and he must hate the sound because he slaps a hand over his mouth and buries his face into it.

“Joshua, no,” you murmur and pull him into you so that his hands can fall and you can cradle his head into your neck, letting your own tears drip onto the silk of his shirt. “It’s not the end,” you try to reason, but he pulls his head away to look down at you with glassy eyes.

“You—you’re lying to me,” Joshua says harshly.

“What are you talking about, I don’t—”

“I know you. I-I—fuck—I fucking know you,” he spits out, causing you to falter backwards. “Why do you think we can’t work this out? I’m the prince, I can—I can change everything and we can be together—”

“Your father —”

“Who gives a fuck, I’ll be king soon anyways and—”

“What if he does something?! What if he revokes your title?”

You’re met with stillness and you think Joshua might just comply with your silent plan but suddenly he’s shaking his head vigorously.

“Okay, then let him. I don’t care about being prince, I—”

“You can’t throw your life away Joshua, not for me!” you protest, holding his face again so you can focus his gaze on yours.

“It’s my life—why, why not?”

“Because I love you. And you can’t sacrifice this—this amazing life—for me!”

“I-I can’t—I don’t,” he stumbles and searches for words as tears fall from his lashes and roll down your hands, your wrists, your arms, “—can’t do it, not without you.”

“You’ve been doing it for years, Joshua, you’ll learn,” you tell him, using one hand to grip his cheek, the other to wipe away at your own.

“You don’t love me,” he chokes out. “You—you wouldn’t do this to me if you loved me.”

“Don’t say that, please.” You press your forehead against his and close your eyes because you can’t bear to look at his tear-streaked cheeks any longer. It’s quiet for a moment, and you can’t help but think that this is the calm before the storm.

“We’ll work it out,” Joshua finally whispers, pulling his head back and cradling the back of your neck with his hands. You don’t say anything, and Joshua doesn’t give you the chance anyway. “Let me have you,” he begs. “We’ll work everything out and it’ll be okay,” he says over a strangled sob, “Just—just be with me tonight.”

And so when you nod, he wipes his tears and pokes his head out of the study to make sure the corridor is empty before tugging your wrist and pulling you to his room. It’s big and grand, just as you’d expect for the prince but Joshua doesn’t want you to look at the intricate walls or the tall ceilings or the golden furniture.

Joshua makes you focus on his burning touch and lets you explore his mouth, his body. And stripped, your bodies are so hot and with wet lips against sheen skin, you feel you might melt into each other’s bones.

Teeth against teeth, nails scraping against skin so hard it digs into the muscle, bruising holds, and sloppy kisses—the feeling is so intense and it crashes onto you and Joshua so hard that you have no other choice but to grip onto each other as you would a lifeline.

And your bodies move so languidly through the sheets, like waves against a shore, or like the wind whistling through the air, until you're trembling and drifting off in each others’ arms.

It would have been perfect. Perfect, if only Joshua had woken up and you were next to him.

Joshua is lost.

After a frantic hour of running around the palace, asking if anyone had seen you, looking for Seokmin to see if he had any answers, Joshua finds himself in the middle of Sol Invictus. And he racks his brain for answers, for a smidge of anything that gives him a reasonable explanation as to why you weren’t in his arms this morning.

Joshua is lost.

He’s staring at the ground now, and all Joshua can wonder is if it was all a dream. If that moment you both looked out his glass window at the stars before you kissed him on his bed was just a figment of his imagination.

He wonders if you actually did thread your soft fingers through his messy hair and hold him close as both hit your peaks together, and he wonders if your lips really did ghost over his skin as he drifted off into sleep.

Joshua almost doesn’t feel Advisor Lee’s hand on his shoulder. He only hears his voice, really, and when he does, the sound grates against his ears.

“She’s gone.” Advisor Lee’s voice has always been harsh, and Joshua wonders how the same man could’ve produced something—someone—as lovely as Seokmin.

“What are you talking about?” Joshua is good at feigning ignorance, but his voice still quivers.

“I know. Your father and mother know too.”

Joshua is lost.

Joshua’s eyes snap up and suddenly his hands are at Advisor Lee’s collar. When the older man doesn’t seem surprised, Joshua sags. “What the fuck do you know. What—” He inhales sharply as he lets go and steps back, inching closer to Eridenus. “—what did you do to her?”

“She left herself.”

“What are—” Joshua heaves. “What?”

He’s doing it before he even realizes it. Stumbling toward Eridenus with his lungs and heart mushed together so tight he’s got a hole in his chest, Joshua steps over the stone lining and crashes into the shallow water.

Seokmin’s face pales when he walks in on the scene. Coming into the courtyard from the South end, he sees Joshua’s figure before he even recognizes it’s him.

That’s not Joshua, he thinks as he watches his father stand in front of Eridenus where the prince sits. That’s not Joshua.

Joshua’s shoulders are always sharp and his eyes are bright. Joshua’s smile is full and his hands are always ready to love.

This isn’t Joshua, and Seokmin feels it in his gut when he approaches Eridenus.

Joshua sits in the middle of the pond. His knees are bent and the cold water stops at the middle of his chest, leaving the upper third of his body dry. His royal coat and velvet pants, his polished shoes and silk button up, are submerged and rub against the algae coated rocks on the bottom of Eridenus.

Advisor Lee doesn’t speak as Seokmin stands next to him, Eridenus in front of the two with the prince in the middle. Joshua doesn’t say a thing. In fact, it seems like he doesn’t even know Seokmin is here now. His neck is tilted down and he stares at his soaked slacks blankly.

Seokmin is stunned.

This can’t be Joshua, because Joshua’s shoulders are always sharp but now they are hunched over and hardly moving, even as he breathes short breaths through his pale lips.

This can’t be Joshua, because Joshua’s eyes are always bright but now they are dull and dead. Seokmin knows Joshua’s eyes are always bright, but he failed to realize what exactly it was that was lighting them up.

Seokmin thought it was the sun but he was wrong, because even now, as Joshua sits under broad daylight, he is still and his eyes are dull.

Two weeks since you’ve seen Joshua’s face and you miss his smile.

You miss his smile, the one that crinkles up all the way to his eyes when he laughs at one of your snarky comments. The one that shines his teeth and the one that seemed to never leave your sight when you were with him.

You miss his smile, but his laugh still rings in your ear, early in the mornings when you blink awake and late in the nights when you gasp in hearty breaths and try not to cry. When you take the walk through the city to your work at Mr. Min’s bookshop, the ringing of the street vendors’ bells are bright and cheery, and sometimes you can hear Joshua’s laugh in the mix.

One month since Joshua last looked you in the eye and he wishes he didn’t know why you left. He wishes he was oblivious, because then he could be angry at you—he could have a reason to forget, to move on, to stop loving you.

Joshua knows why you left and it hurts more than anything because this is nothing like a betrayal at all. You left because you love him, and Joshua cannot dispute that—not now, not ever.

Sometimes he walks through Sol Invictus and plucks a hyacinth, letting it blow off into the wind. He hopes you’ll find the lost petals one day.

Two months since you’ve been in the castle and your life is normal. Well, as normal as it can get for you.

Your first semester of the new year started a few days ago, and you’ve since moved into an apartment near your campus. Your mother thinks it’ll be good for you, and you understand her sentiment but you don’t think she understands.

Ironic, you think. You’ve gone full circle, really. Maybe it does run in your blood, like all the whispers said.

You realize you’re okay with that. Maybe you made a mistake with Joshua, maybe you didn’t. Maybe you almost royally fucked up your reputation more than it already was (thankfully, the Royal Counsel was better at keeping it under the wraps this time), maybe no one cares. Maybe your life is a little bit more messed up now, but again—you’re okay with that.

You miss Joshua. You don’t think you’ll ever stop missing him. You’re also okay with that. You’re starting to realize that you’re okay with pretty much anything when it comes to Joshua. And once again, you’re okay with that.

Six months since he’s seen you and Joshua’s chest aches. Partly because he was distracted during fencing and took a jab straight in the middle but mostly because he misses you.

He stands on the balcony of the royal dining hall, waiting for lunch to be served as he looks over the palace and the kingdom that spread beyond. Joshua sees the tall buildings, the rows of houses, and the infamous Hong University that lay in the middle of the commontown around the hill the castle sits on, and he wonders.

You told him you’d be taking an astronomy class this semester, which should have started a month ago. Joshua is old enough and smart enough to know that collegiate astronomy is more than just the moon and the sun and the pretty little dots that button the sky, but still, he wonders.

The sun and its sunlight, rotations and revolutions.

Will you think about him?

Joshua doesn’t need to wonder—he knows.

The sun is bright today and even though it’s winter, the clouds are nowhere to be seen. It’s a bit of a rare occurrence for the cold months, but Joshua doesn’t mind. When he looks at the blue sky and briefly glances at the sun, his shadow on the stone floor, the reflection of light against the railing, Joshua breathes in the chilly air, filling his lungs deeply.

He knows.

Eight months and you still hear Joshua’s laugh.

You hear it when wind whistles in your ear as you walk to a flower shop to buy a pot. You hear it when you look up at the sun and imagine you’re in the middle of Sol Invictus. You hear it when you crouch down on your balcony, placing the little hyacinth into the pot and packing soil around the base.

You miss Joshua, you miss his smile, and more than anything, you miss his laugh. Right now, as you bathe in the memories of a man so far yet so close, you realize that you can miss him all you want, but you won’t forget. You can’t ever forget.

Ten months later and Joshua’s chest still aches, but he’s okay with that.

He sucks in heavy breaths as his lungs search for air on the fencing match, his trainer leaving the room, leaving Joshua after his request to take a break. Through the rush of blood in his ears, Joshua hardly hears the door behind him open.

“Mingyu told me you’ve been struggling with fencing recently,” his mother says, approaching him. Joshua shuffles in his fencing gear, throwing his helmet to the side.

“I’ve just hit a stump.”

“Something tells me this is more than just a stump,” she inquires as Joshua kicks off his boots.

Joshua scoffs, “What makes you say that?”

“Joshua, what’s wrong?”

He pauses, about to pull off his gloves when he looks up at the Queen. “Everyone in the Royal Counsel knows. I’m sure you know too.”

His mother sighs heavily when he stands up, and she follows him out the training room and toward the Residency Quart. There’s a silence that gaps the mother and son—not that Joshua isn’t used to it. He still smiles and grins, he hugs and he bows, and oftentimes it is genuine, but there’s a silence that always follows. A silence that he never forgets.

A silence he holds when he watches the same kitten you held cross his path when he walks through Sol Invictus, slightly bigger but just as nimble and heart warming. A silence he holds when his eyes gloss over the set of Percy Jackson books in the shelves of his room. A silence he holds when he sinks into his covers and presses his nose to the sheets, wondering if he’ll ever be able to taste your skin on his tongue again.

“I won’t ever understand what went on between you two,” his mother finally says.

“There isn’t anything for you to understand,” Joshua tells her, heading towards his room, but his mother stops him and he narrows his eyes. “What? I felt bad for her, alright? When I saw her all those years ago when it all happened out in the gardens—”

“Joshua, what are you talking about?”

“That’s what you want to know, right? Why I talked to her? Why I—I love her?” His mother gives him a stern look, but Joshua doesn’t relent. He’s starting to realize he’s been too comfortable with this silence. “I never asked you to understand it, but I’ll tell you anyway. Maybe because I pitied her or felt sorry for her or all the same stuff, and maybe I didn’t think she deserved to be ostracized for something she never did but—whatever. I’m not asking you to understand, but I am asking you to leave it alone.”

“You’re my son, Joshua.”

The Queen is Joshua’s mother and she doesn’t understand. She may never understand, and Joshua is okay with that because if he’s being honest, he doesn't think anyone will ever understand. He’s okay with that too.

You will understand, and for him, that’s enough.

You get two letters from the Royal Counsel in your lifetime. You received the first over a year ago—the one you opened with Mr. Min standing across from you in his little bookstore under dingy lights and over the dusty counter. The one you crumpled up and tossed into the dustbin without as much as a second though. The one that led you down a long, winding path which brought you to Joshua.

You receive the second now, standing in your apartment as you look down, except this time you aren’t staring at a paper, you’re staring at the screen of your laptop. You giggle quietly to yourself; Joshua must have taken the Royal Counsel up on still sending letters.

You’ve only looked at the subject of the email so far. It’s got your name and the word “request” written in bold, and you wonder what they want.

Glossing over the text, a wave of nostalgia washes over you. “The Hong Royal Counsel wishes to find you well, as we present a request.” Same shit, huh? “You will have the opportunity to lead a project as you please and earn a notable compensation in payment for your efforts.” Yeah, pretty much.

It’s the same thing, you realize. They want you back—for what, you aren’t sure, but you have a feeling that it doesn’t really matter. Because signed, at the bottom of the email isn’t the usual, “Hong Royal Counsel,” but instead is, “Hong Royal Family.”

The little sun emblem sits below the signatures of the King and Queen, and you press your eyes shut and hold the screen close to your chest, silently praying under your breath that is not a dream.

You don’t know what happened, don’t know what Joshua told them, but to be frank, you don’t care. You’re smart enough to read between the lines.

I don’t understand, they're telling you, But that doesn’t mean I can’t try.

It’s your first day at the castle. Well, your second first day.

When you park your car at the base of the hill, you smile down at the silk over your waist. You abandoned the new ribbon sent to you by the Court, instead donning the one that came to you in a little white box ten months ago. Sometimes, when you hold it close enough, you still think you can smell Joshua’s skin.

You wonder how long you’ll have to wait for him, but as you look up at the sky, you have your answer.

Something speaks to you when you return to 77. Mr. Park is still gruff and cranky but you swear you see the peek-a-boo of a smile on his lips when you walk in. Jihoon’s there too, he greets you regularly.

And of course there’s Seokmin who is hugging you so tight, it reminds you that he is a full grown man and not a child trapped in a large body. You think he almost cries when he laughs with you about how he almost killed the yarrows again (but he brought them back to life! Trust!), and then he beams and tells you that you gotta check out Sol Invictus.

It’s beautiful.

Bright hyacinths that line from east to west and your heart is happy because Seokmin told you he’d get everyone to finish planting them and he did. The purple petals let wind whistle through its stems and leaves, the rustling echoing off the walls of the castle that surround Sol Invictus.

The water of Eridenus gleams under the sun, the stone of your pathways glows brightly, and as your eyes flicker around, you notice something new. In each corner field of Sol Invictus, sits a medium sized sculpture, each of a pegasus but all slightly different in pose and manner.

And then you see him, his back facing you, standing in front of one of the statues that sits in one of the fields on the west end.

Walk the line.

Tracing the pathways—your pathway—from East to West with your shoes clacking their short heels against the tiles—you know he can hear you, but still, he doesn’t move. His hands are neatly holding each other behind his back as his neck tilts slightly upward to stare up at the pegasus.

“Aethon, Aeos, Pyrois, and Phlegon,” Joshua says when you finally stop next to him, shoulders barely brushing against each other. “This one is Pyrois.”

“Helios’ pegasi,” you murmur, glossing over the fine details and intricacies of the statue.

“I thought you might like them.”

You don’t say anything for a moment and grin, watching his eyes light up from the corner of your vision. “I love them.”

“Thank god. You were taking so long to respond, I thought you were going to yell at me for fucking up Sol Invictus.”

You laugh and shake your head, both of you shuffling as you face each other.

“Hi,” you say so lightly it comes out as a breathy laugh when you both finally look each other in the eye.

“Sunshine.” Joshua smiles, holding out his hand. The light is warm when it hits your skin, and Joshua’s dark hair glints a light brown under the beams. You take his hand and run your fingers over the calluses of his palm; his skin is warm when his fingers grasp around yours and as you look at his eyes, you feel it in your bones.

This is Joshua, this is Joshua, and every path you follow will always lead you back to him.

find an alternate ending here!

edit. thanks 4 making it this far! if ur interested i expand on the concept of an isohel more here and little tidbits here, and it's honestly just a ramble but i hope it makes clear why i made some decisions w the story if ur interested :3 a/n. aaah it's done! as per em's request, i will be posting a one-shot of these two and their lives in the future bc i feel like i robbed u guys of a possibly fluffier ending so keep an eye out for that ... anyways, i hope u enjoyed, comments / reblogs would mean the world to me and >_< thank u for reading!

taglist. @synthetickitsune @ixayjun @leejihoonownsmyheart @dahliatopia @gyuswhore @hoeforcheol @5xiang @hajimelvr @miriamxsworld @blinkjunhui @lixiel0ver @josefines-things @mimisxs @kawennote09 @bbyjjunie @rubyreduji @todorokiskitten @98-0603 @hipsdofangirl @minnie-mouser22 @minhui896 @whippedforjihoon @nishloves @woozarts (strikethrough could not be tagged)

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Petrichor [Preview] | Joshua Hong

Synopsis: Joshua Hong has felt inexplicably drawn to you since the first time he saw you. Alas, he was betrothed to another. Against his better judgment, Joshua still allows himself to get close to you. When you start to fall for him too, what happens then? 

Pairing: naiad! joshua x human g/n! reader (ft. spirit of opportunity! platonic minghao x reader, cameo by cupid! jeonghan) Genre: greek mythology au, ancient athens au, forbidden love, fluff, angst Word count (for preview): 729 words Word count (for full fic): tbd. est. 10-15k words Warnings (for preview): none Warnings (for full fic): loss of vision, discrimination, greek deities, insecurities, blood (reader gets a small cut), slight profanity, toxic relationship (Joshua’s betrothed is a b*tch), violence, others tbd.  Est. release date: end january/ early february 2024 Notes: this fic is inspired by 4 things. (1) the story of Daphnis and Nomia. (2) the lyrics of akuma no ko by higuchi ai. (3) levi ackerman fics written by ReiaBritannia on wattpad. (4) this amazing fic by @\fairyhaos.

A/n: I’m also thinking of creating a taglist specially for this fic. If you’re not on my perm taglist but want to be tagged for this fic, send me an ask or comment below! Thanks :) 

The situation that Joshua Hong found himself in was one he never expected. The whole thing was ironic really. As a naiad, a water nymph, he knew that mortals, humans specifically, would be inexplicably drawn towards him should they ever lay eyes on him. In fact, much to Joshua’s annoyance, there were several occasions where he had to avoid some rather unsavoury characters. 

Yet this time, the tables were turned. Here Joshua was, crouched behind some foliage near the creek he presided over just so he could observe this one human from afar. There was something about this human that inexplicably drew Joshua towards them. He was completely enamoured and fascinated by everything about them. 

They became a regular sight at the creek over the past few months. Joshua remembered the first time he laid eyes on them. It was a balmy morning in spring. He had just finished his duty of directing some fresh water to a nearby town. When he returned to the creek, the human was there, sitting on a sky blue picnic mat crafting an intricate looking object. He remembered being struck by the sheer brightness in the human’s eyes. Literally and figuratively. Their eyes glistened under the sunlight, reflecting the sparkles from the water’s surface. At the same time, their eyes were full of life. They told Joshua everything about the human’s appreciation for their surroundings, their life, and most of all their determination to live life to the fullest. Joshua was in awe. That was the first time he ever saw such striking eyes. 

Since then, Joshua felt as if there was a magnet pulling him closer to the human. Overtime, Joshua began noticing other details about the human. They would always visit the creek on the weekends, often staying for hours at a time. They would simply sit on the picnic mat reading or making those intricate looking crafts. There were even instances when they would pluck the tiny flowers around the creek to make flower crowns. He even noticed some of the human’s quirks. Like how their eyes would crinkle slightly, or how there would be a ghost of a smile on their face when they read something funny or accomplished something. They would also crinkle their nose and furrow their brows when they were concentrating. One thing Joshua definitely picked up on, was that the human was always alone. This puzzled him immensely. Weren’t humans supposed to be social creatures? 

Eventually, the amount of time Joshua was spending observing the human began to drive him crazy. Sure, he could partially blame the fact that naiads were naturally curious creatures. But he knew that the attraction he felt went beyond the confines of rational curiosity. This was infatuation, obsession even. In Joshua’s attempt to figure out what this attraction was, he approached his acquaintance, a relative of Cupid, Yoon Jeonghan, to ask if he was hit by yet another one of Jeonghan’s infamous stray arrows. To his disappointment, Joshua was not. (Jeonghan adamantly insisted that “using arrows is soooo 2 centuries ago” although he cheekily admitted that he did randomly shoot love arrows into the air “just for the fun of it”.)

Still, Jeonghan did give him a somewhat useful piece of advice. Infatuation. Love. Jeonghan explained that these feelings were complicated. There was usually much more nuance that needed to be teased out when attraction was involved. Especially in this case where the attraction was one-sided (for now anyway). Simply put, Joshua had either really fallen for this human, or there was something about this human that he longed for. Something that sparked an intense sense of desire and curiosity within him, like a personality trait or the human’s way of life. Perhaps it was a bit of both possibilities? 

Whatever it was, Joshua would need to figure that out for himself. Outwardly, Joshua cursed Jeonghan’s advice, thinking that it was just like a relative of Cupid to tell people to keep spying on humans like a creep from the sidelines. However, deep down, he knew Jeonghan was right. His desire, his need to decipher this complex feelings of attraction for the human was overwhelming. That human lit a fire within him, and he needed to quell those flames before it completely consumed his life. 

So, Joshua (rather reluctantly) continued his routine. He hid behind the foliage, and he watched.

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---

౨ৎ voicemails joshua hong leaves you while he’s on tour - fluff (with a pinch of angst), established relationship, gn!reader (pet names used: darling) warnings: one slightly dirty joke

...one: i saw you called me, sorry i didn’t pick up darling, we were busy shooting some stuff. wait (pause) it’s past midnight at home, what aren’t you sleeping? get your ass to bed right now

...two: now i see why you’re always so pissed when i ghost you, call me back now! or text me. or send me a picture, i don’t care

...three: how mad would you be if i shaved my head? i think i'm going through an existential crisis or something. but that’s because you’re not here with me. (pause) anyway, dino and seungkwan were arguing again and i wanted to record it for you, but i left my phone somewhere

...four: i went for a walk today and it was so beautiful, you wouldn’t believe how nice it was there! but then, for the rest of the walk, all i could think about was how wonderful it would be if you were here with me

...five: i miss you so much today. how are you? how was your day. call me back as soon as you can darling

...six: my mum just called and the first thing she asked for was you. not going to lie, i felt a bit offended. you're lucky i love you though. she also said something about coming to korea but now i'm not so sure if i want her to come here because i feel like she'll be all over you and forget about me. her son. stop stealing my mum from me

...seven: did you like the accessories i put on for the encore today? i took some photos for you, but i'm not sure how they turned out since i was in such a hurry, i literally almost forgot about putting shoes back on, so if they're blurry i'm sorry

...eight: it sucks sleeping alone. wish you were here

...nine: make sure to dress warmly today, and i mean it! if i hear even a single sneeze when i come home I'm going to tie you to the bed and not in the way you like

...ten: just a week left. we can do it darling

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---

"hey.... shua, do you have plans tomorrow?"

all that's lighting up his hotel room is the lamp, but it's enough for him to see what's hanging on the closet door. he smiles to himself, though, turning onto his side. the plastic wrapping his tux is shiny, and all he can think about is what you'll look like tomorrow. the two of you don't keep secrets, but he likes this one. he likes what the two of you are doing now, too, even if there's a tiny part of him that yearns to see you and hold you.

"i might," he plays along. "but if you have a better idea..."

your giggle says it all. he wishes he could kiss that smile now. "no, no, don't cancel your plans for me... i was just thinkin'..."

"yeah?" he's glad he's alone now. jeonghan would have taken pictures and sent them to you, just so you know what you do to him (as if you didn't already know).

"i think... if you're free..." he can practically see that twinkle in your eyes now, definitely smiling too hard to stop.

"yeah?" he presses you a little further, unable to fight his own smile. just say it. i'll say yes.

"i think we should get married." the line goes quiet for a minute, and its screaming out how giddy you are now. "y'know. if you're free."

his own engagement ring, a perfect match to your own, shines in the low light. even after all these years, you still poke fun at the way he asked you out--i think we should go on a date... if you're free.

"for you?" his words match your own then, "i'm always free." he's smiling so hard at his phone now, and he curls up a little tighter. "let's get married."

---

What the Fuck is Up with Secretary Hong? Pt. 1 - Left and Right

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An Oh Baby You miniseries.

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Petrichor | Joshua Hong

Synopsis: Joshua Hong has felt inexplicably drawn to you since the first time he saw you. Alas, he was betrothed to another. Against his better judgment, Joshua still allows himself to get close to you. When you start to fall for him too, what happens then?  Pairing: naiad! joshua x human g/n! reader (ft. spirit of opportunity! platonic minghao x reader, cameo by cupid! jeonghan, mention of god of time, chronos! seungcheol) Genre: greek mythology au, ancient athens au, forbidden love, fluff, angst Word count: 26.6k words Warnings: loss of vision, discrimination, greek deities, insecurities, blood, slight profanity, toxic relationship (Joshua’s betrothed is a b*tch), dehumanisation (because of Joshua’s betrothed. She calls him pet), mention of mutilation (again it’s the betrothed) , violence, food, slightly suggestive, fainting and sickness (reader gets sick), nicknames (darling, bunny)  Note: I’m including the preview in this version of the full fic because it flows better. I also apologise in advance if there are any spelling/ grammatical errors.  A/n: Once again, thank you Yena @fairyhaos for inspiring this fic! And a huge thank you to @wonijinjin, @brownsugarbaybee, @wheeboo and @slytherinshua for listening to me ramble about this fic ❤️ I hope I’ve done this trope justice and I’m really sorry for the wait. As always, feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated!! Thank you ❤️

ᨒ Petrichor (noun): the scent of the earth after rain. Some would describe the scent as distinctively earthy, pleasant, and sweet. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

The situation that Joshua Hong found himself in was one he never expected. The whole thing was ironic really. As a naiad, a water nymph, he knew that mortals, humans specifically, would be inexplicably drawn towards him should they ever lay eyes on him. In fact, much to Joshua’s annoyance, there were several occasions where he had to avoid some rather unsavoury characters. 

Yet this time, the tables were turned. Here Joshua was, crouched behind some foliage near the creek he presided over just so he could observe this one human from afar. There was something about this human that inexplicably drew Joshua towards them. He was completely enamoured and fascinated by everything about them. 

They became a regular sight at the creek over the past few months. Joshua remembered the first time he laid eyes on them. It was a balmy morning in spring. He had just finished his duty of directing some fresh water to a nearby town. When he returned to the creek, the human was there, sitting on a sky blue picnic mat crafting an intricate looking object. He remembered being struck by the sheer brightness in the human’s eyes. Literally and figuratively. Their eyes glistened under the sunlight, reflecting the sparkles from the water’s surface. At the same time, their eyes were full of life. They told Joshua everything about the human’s appreciation for their surroundings, their life, and most of all their determination to live life to the fullest. Joshua was in awe. That was the first time he ever saw such striking eyes. 

Since then, Joshua felt as if there was a magnet pulling him closer to the human. Overtime, Joshua began noticing other details about the human. They would always visit the creek on the weekends, often staying for hours at a time. They would simply sit on the picnic mat reading or making those intricate looking crafts. There were even instances when they would pluck the tiny flowers around the creek to make flower crowns. He even noticed some of the human’s quirks. Like how their eyes would crinkle slightly, or how there would be a ghost of a smile on their face when they read something funny or accomplished something. They would also crinkle their nose and furrow their brows when they were concentrating. One thing Joshua definitely picked up on, was that the human was always alone. This puzzled him immensely. Weren’t humans supposed to be social creatures? 

Eventually, the amount of time Joshua was spending observing the human began to drive him crazy. Sure, he could partially blame the fact that naiads were naturally curious creatures. But he knew that the attraction he felt went beyond the confines of rational curiosity. This was infatuation, obsession even. In Joshua’s attempt to figure out what this attraction was, he approached his acquaintance, a relative of Cupid, Yoon Jeonghan, to ask if he was hit by yet another one of Jeonghan’s infamous stray arrows. To his disappointment, Joshua was not. (Jeonghan adamantly insisted that “using arrows is soooo 2 centuries ago” although he cheekily admitted that he did randomly shoot love arrows into the air “just for the fun of it”.)

Still, Jeonghan did give him a somewhat useful piece of advice. Infatuation. Love. Jeonghan explained that these feelings were complicated. There was usually much more nuance that needed to be teased out when attraction was involved. Especially in this case where the attraction was one-sided (for now anyway). Simply put, Joshua had either really fallen for this human, or there was something about this human that he longed for. Something that sparked an intense sense of desire and curiosity within him, like a personality trait or the human’s way of life. Perhaps it was a bit of both possibilities? 

Whatever it was, Joshua would need to figure that out for himself. Outwardly, Joshua cursed Jeonghan’s advice, thinking that it was just like a relative of Cupid to tell people to keep spying on humans like a creep from the sidelines. However, deep down, he knew Jeonghan was right. His desire, his need to decipher this complex feelings of attraction for the human was overwhelming. That human lit a fire within him, and he needed to quell those flames before it completely consumed his life. 

So, Joshua (rather reluctantly) continued his routine. He hid behind the foliage, and he watched. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

When you emerged from the shade of the dense forest, the warmth and light of the mid-morning sun welcomed you. Taking a moment to recenter yourself after the somewhat strenuous trek to your destination, you closed your eyes. Reopening your eyes, you were once again greeted with the most picturesque landscape before you. 

Sure, it might seem like another open field of grass next to a creek. A sight that was not uncommon in the rural forested areas surrounding the Athenian capital. But this place was different. There was something about this particular field of grass next to this creek that was absolutely mesmerising. You shouldn’t be surprised. Afterall, the gods lived on Mount Olympus which overlooked Greece. The scenery should be befitting for the gods to lay their eyes upon. Regardless, no matter how many times you visited this place, you were always enthralled by the scenery. 

The field of grass was extremely luscious. You loved to feel the blades of grass brushing against your fingertips. They were soft, almost feathery. Tiny flowers were scattered across the entire field, providing subtle pops of different colours to the otherwise uniform vibrant emerald colour of the grass. You were also treated to the sight of butterflies. Besides the occasional rustling of the foliage, if it was silent enough, you swore that you could almost hear their wings fluttering as they flew across the field towards the mountains that lay in the background. Sometimes, when you arrived early, you would be treated to the sight of the majestic mountains that were shrouded in the morning mist slowly clear, allowing the sun to peak out from between the mountain peaks. 

You always loved the way that the streaks of the sun’s rays would descend upon this little oasis. They illuminated the whole area with a gentle, golden glow, making the whole space look ethereal. You liked to think that the sun god Helios paid extra attention to illuminating this field because it was so secluded, so untouched from civilisation. 

You especially adored the way that the sun’s rays were reflected on the creek. This was certainly the clearest, bluest waters you had ever seen. Where others saw water, you saw alluring pale blue crystals that sparkled and twinkled underneath the sun’s rays which danced gracefully across the surface of the water. Even when the light breeze brushed against the water, the ripples simply created another bewitching performance for you. You could spend hours watching the water, entranced by the beauty of it all. 

However, you had to admit that you loved the scent that blanketed this area more than anything. You would inhale deeply, savouring the fresh air. The air was such a stark contrast to the stuffy air you were usually surrounded by in the Athenian capital. While you could detect the crisp, fresh odor of pine from the forest, it was faint compared to the scent being emitted from the open field of grass next to the creek that lay before you. The scent was distinct. It was sweet, pleasant, and had an element of earthiness to it. If you could liken the scent to anything, it would be the scent that lingered in the air right after there was a bout of rain, or the scent of the morning dew that always lingered on the grass and flowers. Petrichor. Yes, that was the word used to describe this scent. 

As your eyes drifted over the landscape, and you inhaled the scent of petrichor that wafted through the air, a wave of peace, contentment, and emotional reprieve washed over you. Beyond that, you were overcome with a feeling of gratitude and nostalgia. Gratitude towards your friend, Minghao, for pushing you to find this place, gratitude for being able to actually see this ethereal sight in your lifetime, and nostalgia for all the times you had spent your weekends here. You smiled softly, allowing yourself to embrace all these emotions all at once. There was no need to repress any emotions here. You could just let go. Here, you were alone. Alone but free and happy. 

Yes, you thought to yourself, this field was a sacred space for you. A sanctuary, an escape where you could rest, heal, and seek refuge from the chaos of daily life. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Once you made yourself comfortable on your picnic mat, you gazed fondly at the well-thumbed leather bound book that lay on your lap. Out of all the Greek tragedies and epics you read, you had to say that this compilation of popular Greek quotations was your favourite. Sure, you read this book multiple times over, to the point that you could recite most of the quotes by heart. But you loved the feeling of physically flipping through the pages and letting your eyes drift over the words on the paper. Running your fingers over the leather, you carefully opened the book and let yourself be immersed in the beautifully crafted words. 

You quickly lost track of how much time passed. Only when your stomach called out for food did you notice that it was already midday. Placing your book down, you turned to rummage through your woven basket for the lunch you packed. As you did so, you accidentally nicked the palm of your hand on one of the unfinished crafts inside. You hissed at the stinging sensation, quickly pulling your hand out to inspect the damage. You sighed when you saw a tiny cut across your palm. It wasn’t deep, but it started to draw a bit of blood. 

Unbeknownst to you, someone had been watching you all morning. It was Joshua. He was silently observing you from his usual spot behind the foliage. Currently, he was lost in his thoughts wondering why you were reading the same book again. Today was probably the fifth time that he’s seen you bring the book to the creek. When you placed your book down and turned towards your basket, Joshua stood on his tip toes while craning his neck to see the title of the book engraved on the leather cover. 

However, your hiss of pain broke Joshua’s concentration. Out of shock, he yelped and stumbled forward, fortunately regaining his balance before he fell through the foliage. Joshua’s eyes widened and he instinctively slammed his hands over his mouth to try and muffle the yelp that had already escaped him. 

You were making your way to the creek to clean your wound, but the sudden rustling of the foliage behind you caught your attention. Also, was that a yelp? Was someone else here? Turning, you stalked cautiously towards the foliage. 

Joshua did not dare to move a muscle as he heard your footsteps approach. He thought the best thing was to just stand still and pray to the deities that you would walk away. Well, today certainly was not his lucky day. In his attempt to stabilise himself, he had forgotten that he was in fact taller than the bushes that he was hiding behind. 

You eyed the black tuft of hair sticking out from between the bushes. So your suspicions proved to be correct. There was someone else here. 

“Hello? Is everything okay?” You called out. 

Joshua scrunched his face, internally cursing to the deities that they had once again let him down. He began to shuffle around trying to figure out what he should do. His brain told him that he should turn and flee, but his heart said otherwise. It was the first time Joshua had heard your voice, and his heart fluttered in response when you called out to him. This was okay, right? Meeting you would be okay. Maybe he would be able to figure out why he was so drawn to you better this way. Relenting to his heart’s desires, he steeled his nerves and tried to push his way through the foliage to meet you, which proved to be more difficult than he expected. 

Your caution turned into amusement and curiosity as a figure emerged from the bushes. Or at least was trying desperately to. It was apparent that he was struggling to disentangle himself from the bushes. He was cursing under his breath, muttering how he was not going to help the Goddess Gaia water her plants anymore. He stomped around, shoving the plants aside before finally stumbling out of the bushes.

Huffing, he pulled the twigs out of his hair, brushed the leaves off his chiton, and made sure that the gown rested comfortably on his shoulders. He readjusted the belt around his waist as well. You watched as he proceeded to angrily twirl his gold jewelry back in place, his necklace, his ring on his pinky finger, and the arm bands around his biceps. You swallowed thickly at the sight. With that build, the divine aura around him, his gold jewelry, there was no way that he was an ordinary man. His aura reminded you of Minghao’s. Perhaps he was a spirit as well? 

You were unable to keep yourself from snickering. He might be a spirit but just now, he seemed like a clumsy, stumbling fawn trying to walk.

Hearing your snickers, it finally clicked in Joshua’s mind that he was being watched. And by the entrancing human that captured his attention. He suddenly ceased his frantic readjustments and looked up at you like a deer caught in headlights. 

His wide eyes made you burst out laughing. 

Joshua’s expression softened. You were even more mesmerising up close. Your laughter was like music to his ears. Taking in your presence, Joshua’s eyes landed on the injured palm you were clutching close to your body. 

Joshua cleared his throat awkwardly, “Uhm, you should really get that cut healed.”

Sobering up quickly, you nodded, “I’ll just clean it in the creek and bandage it with a cloth that I have on me.”

When you turned towards the creek, Joshua’s hand shot out to grasp your wrist, “No… Don’t clean it in the creek… Wait… I mean… I can heal that for you if you want? Does that sound creepy. I swear I’m a naiad? Yea, you probably have never heard of a male naiad before. That explains why I’m so weak. I can’t heal big wounds or reverse curses or whatever. I’m kind of useless as a naiad. That’s what everyone else says. I can’t do anything the other naiads can… Uh…I apologise, I’m rambling again aren’t I?”

You shook your head, indicating that it was okay. He was a naiad. That explained the divine aura around him. He was definitely a cute naiad, though you felt a pinch of pity for him since that was how lowly he thought of himself. You stood there, patiently waiting for him to gather his thoughts.

Realising what he was doing, Joshua let go of your wrist. He gave you a sheepish look, “I mean… I can still heal small cuts like that… if you don’t mind of course.”

“Sure!” You chirped. 

“Really?” Joshua was dumbfounded. Why would you trust him when you both just met? 

You shrugged your shoulders and extended your injured palm out to him, “I’m y/n by the way. What’s your name? I think I should probably know the name of the handsome naiad who is going out of his way to heal me. Don’t you think so?”

Joshua flushed at your words, even your name was beautiful. Muttering that his name was Joshua, he took your hand in his, treating your hand as he would treat a delicate rose petal. A soft, warm blue light emitted from his hand enveloping yours. Soon, the cut was gone. All that was left was a faint line from where the cut was, and the strong scent of petrichor which calmed you down greatly. 

Inspecting your palm, you beamed at Joshua, “Thank you! Wow, that was amazing! I’ve never actually seen a naiad’s powers in action!” 

Joshua turned his body away from you, refusing to look you in your eyes. He couldn’t believe that you, the human he was completely enamoured with, was treating him with such kindness and gratitude. You thought he was amazing, that his powers were amazing. He had expected you to run or look at him in disgust. He didn’t make a good first impression on you with his stumbling and rambling. Plus, he had basically blurted out all his flaws, his insignificance compared to other naiads. 

Sensing Joshua’s discomfort, you tried to tone down your excitement. Trying to convey as much sincerity as you could in your voice, you said, “really Joshua. Thank you, I really mean it.”

Joshua fiddled with the hems of his chiton. Then, he lifted his head and whispered, “no problem.”

You observed Joshua’s nervous disposition, finding yourself unable to look away. There was something about Joshua, something that made you want to find out more about him, something that made you want to spend time with him. Obviously, there was the physical attraction you felt towards him. Joshua was incredibly attractive. His black undercut made his otherwise gentle eyes look more piercing, as if he was staring right into your soul. But the corners of his lips curled upwards, softening his appearance. His muscles were made more prominent by the golden armbands that rested on his biceps. 

Joshua’s physical appearance screamed strength. Yet, you could discern that within him, there was inner turmoil, deep seeded sadness, hopelessness and self-loathing. You chalked it up to being the accumulation of emotional scars over the years, left by the sharp swords of those who had repeatedly hurled insults at him. The ones who called him a useless naiad. The ones who damaged him, ostracised him, leaving him a vulnerable shell of what he could have been. 

Your heart ached for Joshua. From personal experience, you knew that underneath all the hurt and discrimination he endured, lay a pure, innocent, soul who longed to be healed. You were determined to help him, to save him. You wanted him to find the strength to love himself, and make peace with who he was as a person, who he was as a naiad. You swore to yourself that as long as he would let you, you would stand by Joshua’s side. 

An awkward silence filled the air. Joshua shrank into himself slightly under your tender gaze, snapping you out of your thoughts. Biting your lip to reprimand yourself from staring too long, you hesitated before gesturing towards your basket, “Joshua? It’s midday right now. I was actually just about to have lunch. Please, you’re welcome to join me, I always bring extra food… and I would really love to get to know you better. However, if you’re uncomfortable with my presence, I can go and you can have the creek to yourself.” 

“Me?” Joshua pointed to himself.

“Who else here is named Joshua?” 

“Why?” Joshua breathed incredulously. 

“Why not?” You replied. 

Hearing your response, Joshua recoiled even further. It was beyond his imagination to think that a person as perfect as you would want to get to know someone as damaged as he was. He really longed to get to know you too. It’s just that this was all so embarrassing for him, and he really should not let himself get close to you. This could end badly for the two of you. He should have run earlier, he actually should run and hide right now. He was grateful that you would give him the option to choose whether he wanted you to stay or not, though you shouldn’t have to go because he was being a blushing idiot. He looked at you patiently waiting for him to give you a response while he grappled with all his emotions. 

Just as Joshua opened his mouth to excuse himself politely, his heart once again betrayed his brain. To your delight, and his horror, he blurted, “No, please don’t go. Stay. I… I would love to get to know you better too.” 𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Wheezing, you grabbed onto Joshua’s forearm, “So the rumours were true? Narcissus is only Narcissus because that stupid cupid Jeonghan shot a love arrow into the pond where he was trying to check his reflection?”

Despite Joshua flushing at the close contact between the two of you, Joshua nodded enthusiastically, “Yes, it’s true. Stupid cupid. That’s a new name for Jeonghan. I’ll have to call him that next time.”

In the short span of three hours that you spent talking to Joshua over lunch, you had gotten more comfortable with each other. Once Joshua warmed up to you, seeing that you were really sincere in wanting to get to know you, he opened up a little. He still wasn’t quite comfortable talking about himself, but he was happy to talk about the adventures of his acquaintances. 

By now, you could safely say that you were completely enamoured with Joshua. He was so gorgeous. You loved the spark of life that lit up in his eyes when he talked about something stupid his acquaintances did (and especially when you said something funny). His laugh was melodic. You adored his little quirk of raising his clenched fist in front of his face while leaning backwards when he laughed. It was so endearing to see how the reserved chuckles turned into full blown belly laughs now that he was enjoying himself. You were definitely successful at breaking down some of his walls today. You also came to know that Joshua was hilarious, witty, and best of all, he was unpredictable in the best way possible. You thought you were about to cry laughing when Joshua placed a piece of lettuce on his head, insisting that he needed some shade from the afternoon sun. 

Squeezing Joshua’s arm one last time before letting go, you heaved a deep sigh to compose yourself. Your eyes landed on your tiny sundial. It was almost 4 in the afternoon. You pouted slightly, realising that you would soon have to part ways with Joshua. 

Noticing the change in your mood, Joshua asked, “Do you need to go soon?” 

You shook your head, “I can stay for another half an hour.” You would really be pushing it as the forest would get dark very quickly. However, anytime spent with Joshua was worth possibly getting lost in the forest.

Shaking those thoughts out of your head, you took another deep breath, relishing in the scent of petrichor that lingered in the air. Was it just you or was the scent stronger now that Joshua was right next to you? Shrugging, you let a comfortable silence envelop the two of you. 

“Y/n? Can I ask you a question before you go?” 

You let out a hum in response to Joshua. 

“How did you find this creek? It’s kind of far from the rest of Athenian civilisation.”

Musing over his question, you explained cryptically, “I guess it all started with one word, kairos.”

Joshua raised his eyebrow at that. You shifted so you were facing him, “You see, my friend, Minghao, he’s a spirit of opportunity. You’ve probably never heard of him. Long story short, I was going through some stuff, and was in desperate need of a break. When Minghao found out, all he said was that word, kairos. He explained that kairos meant the right time. He said that despite all that I was going through, it showed that it was the right time for me to get out of my comfort zone. The right time to venture out of the capital which I lived in all my life to try and find something, perhaps a place, that would help to heal me.”

You paused to gesture to the scenery around you before continuing, “As you can tell, I found this place. You can bet I really hated him at the time. Like you said, it is far from the rest of Athenian civilisation. Honestly I almost gave up when he told me I had to walk through the dense forest. But it was worth it. I don’t know how to explain it. When I was walking through the forest, it was as if there was a little voice in my head telling me to walk this way. It felt like there was a magnet drawing me to this place. Then I came across this little oasis. Minghao was right, it was the right time for me to venture out. I guess… you could say that this creek, this whole area, I didn’t find it. It found me. It healed me when I needed it the most.”

You could still remember the day Minghao told you to walk through the forest. 

“Y/n. You will find what you need when you take the opportunity to venture out of your comfort zone. Given you’re feeling this way, it’s the right time.” Minghao said exasperatedly. 

You rolled your eyes at him, “of course you would say that, you’re a spirit of opportunity.”

Finally sick of your protests, Minghao pushed you out of your house towards the path he had asked you to take, “Don’t come back until you actually try to find what you need.” Then, he added more quietly, “Y/n, please. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Seeing Minghao’s pleading eyes, you relented. If Minghao was this convinced that this walk would do you some good, you should at least try. Minghao’s advice had never steered you in the wrong direction before. Still, you grumbled as you stormed through the dense forest, pushing away the twigs and foliage out of your way. You didn’t know how long you were stalking through the forest. Letting out a frustrated growl, you were about to give up. Your feet hurt, you were tired, and all you wanted to do was go home to sleep. Just then, you saw some light streaming through the thick shade of the forest. 

It was as if the light was a rope, wrapping itself around you and pulling you in that direction. Something inside you told you that you should venture forward, just a little more. So that’s just what you did. And you’ve been coming back to this oasis ever since.

You smiled at the fond memory. You should thank Minghao once again for leading you to find this place. You did meet Joshua because of it. He’s one more attractive reason as to why you will be returning again next week, if he is agreeable to it that is. 

Joshua nodded in understanding. Since there was a naiad presiding over this creek, ie, him, it was normal that mortals would find the creek more alluring. 

You let out a regretful sigh, “I’m sorry Joshua, I really have to go now before it gets dark… I really had a good time today. With you. Would you be okay meeting again next week? You see, I return here every weekend. Only if you’re okay with it.”

You looked at Joshua hopefully. You really wanted to see him again. 

Joshua’s heart fluttered at the prospect of spending another weekend with you. While his conscience began acting up, telling him that this was a really bad idea to make it a recurring thing as you both might end up hurt or worse should she find out, against his better judgment, he elected to ignore his conscience. 

Joshua stood up, smoothened out his chiton, and held his palm out to you shyly, “Sure. I’ll be happy to. Same time and place next week?”

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Before you knew it, a month and a half had already passed since that fateful day that Joshua stumbled (literally) into your life. “Same time and place next week?” became a routine question that you would ask each other at the end of your weekly meetings. 

During that time, you made some progress with Joshua. You were beginning to break down the walls he built to protect himself. You were happy and touched that he was now comfortable enough with you to open up a little bit more. You could tease each other, and share little stories about your daily lives. Joshua no longer lowered his head or turned away when talking to you. He would look you in the eyes and listen to your stories intently with his face scrunched in concentration (and with a light blush dusted across his cheeks). More often than not, you would both talk about your shared interests and hobbies. In one of your earlier conversations, you were overjoyed when Joshua expressed his interest in the crafts that you frequently made by the creek. As it turns out, Joshua loved to make little crafts as well, and your meetings soon turned into crafting slash gossip sessions. 

Originally, you were prepared to do most of the talking. However, as Joshua got more comfortable with you, you were pleasantly surprised that he was more willing to tell you stories as well. Sure, he was still rather reluctant to delve into his personal life or history too much, but he was more than happy to tell you about all the little flowers he was able to water, or all the little animals he came across in the forest. Of course, you respected his boundaries. Afterall, there were things about your own life that you hadn’t shared with him. You understood that he needed time to overcome his insecurities and issues regarding his own identity. 

And in the times that Joshua slipped into his self-deprecating ways when talking about himself, you would just gently remind him that he was doing well before tactfully steering the conversation in a different direction. Spending time with you hearing all those little words from you that reaffirmed his importance and successes slowly mended the wounds and scars that were left on his soul.  

Although he was a naiad, Joshua began to think that you were the one who had mystical abilities. It was as if you were a god of love. You embodied love, care, and beauty. You treated him so gently, with so much care that Joshua began to feel normal again. You indulged his silly little antics, his quirks, his flaws. You made him feel loved. For once, he felt like he mattered.

Joshua was convinced he did want to be near you. He wanted to be with you. In fact, instead of having his initial curiosity satiated, his desire to learn more about you had only magnified in the last few weeks. You exuded an air of self-confidence, and your unconditional acceptance of him, flaws and all, were qualities that Joshua was completely baffled by. How could you be so lovely, humble, and kind? Yea, he had really started to fall completely, and hopelessly in love with you. Luckily for him, you felt the same way towards him.  

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Humming to yourself, you checked your basket one last time to make sure that you had all the materials needed for the day’s crafting session. The crafts Joshua made usually consisted of beaded jewelry. He was fascinated by your ability to weave baskets in a variety of styles and had asked if you could teach him today. 

With one last huff, you pushed past the last of the foliage from the dense forest, brightening up immediately at the sight of Joshua. Or more specifically, Joshua’s broad back. He was crouched over the creek with his back turned to you. For someone that tall, he looked so small and cute. That was when the most amazing idea came to your mind. 

You placed your basket down as quietly as you could. Snickering, you launched yourself at Joshua’s back, hoping to give him a surprise back hug. Sadly, today was not your lucky day. Just as you were about to wrap your arms around Joshua’s shoulders, he shuffled to the right and stood up. You let out a loud squeal, your arms flailing around wildly in the air. You thought you heard Joshua’s distant, worried scream of your name when your body came into contact with the cold creek water. 

Almost instantly, you felt Joshua’s hands grab onto you, heaving you out of the water. 

You shot him a glare, squirming in his arms, “you weren’t supposed to move.”

Joshua scoffed, “that’s the first thing you say to me? Maybe I should have left you in the water. How was I supposed to know my gorgeous Y/n decided to be an idiot and launch themself at my back?”

At Joshua’s words, you stilled. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Joshua thought you were gorgeous? He called you his? This might be a good time for you to combust on the spot. Coughing to cover up your embarrassment, you let a cheeky grin spread across your face, “You think I’m gorgeous? And I’m yours? Since when? I don’t remember agreeing…”

Joshua flushed, sputtering, “No… I… I didn’t say any of that… I said sly… yea… sly ridiculous Y/n. Yea… that’s it…”

You brought your face dangerously close to his, enjoying the view of his eyes darting around from beneath his long lashes, looking anywhere but your eyes. You teased, “Reaaalllllyyyy? Because I could have sworn that you said my gorgeous Y/n….” 

Joshua sulked, whining that he didn’t under his breath. You chuckled at his adorable expression. 

Sneezing lightly as a gust of wind passed by, you shivered. Noticing this, Joshua sighed, “What am I going to do with you? Come here. I can only dry you off slightly, but it will be enough to prevent you from catching a cold.”

You scooted closer to Joshua. He raised his palms, letting them glow the soft, warm blue light that was always emitted when he used his naiad abilities. As he started to pull some of the water out of your soaked clothing, the strong scent of petrichor invaded your nose, causing you to sigh in contentment. 

“Why are you always doing that?” Joshua asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You always sigh when I use my powers. I’m sorry, is it uncomfortable for you?”

Whipping your head around, you raised your hand to squish Joshua’s cheeks together, “NO! It’s nothing like that. Don’t ever think that. Your powers are amazing. It’s just that when you use your powers, there’s a really sweet, pleasant smell that I really like.”

“Imndnmmdonenee.”

“What?” You tilted your head, wondering what Joshua was saying. 

Annoyed, he pointed to his squished cheeks. 

“Oh, sorry.” You said, letting go of his face.

Joshua repeated himself, “I said, I’m done. Drying you off I mean. Here, you can have my coat first. Shall we begin basket weaving then? We really don’t have all day.” Joshua feigned an indifferent look, but you could tell he was secretly happy that you actually liked it when he used his abilities. 

You wrapped Joshua’s coat around your shoulders. Wow, you thought to yourself, he really did smell like petrichor. Plopping yourself down on your picnic mat, you snuggled into his coat further, inhaling his comforting scent. 

For a while, you both just sat there, with you teaching Joshua how to weave the different basket styles. You watched, amused by Joshua’s concentration. It was endearing to see how much he loved crafts. It wasn’t exactly an easy task, but it was nice to see that Joshua was able to find joy in engaging in his favourite hobbies.

When he finished weaving a small basket, you cheered loudly, praising his amazing handiwork, “Wow!! It was your first attempt but you did so well? I think I’m going to need you to do all my basket weaving from now on.”

Joshua smiled shyly, still unsure how to feel about being praised, “That’s because I had a good teacher.”

You clicked your tongue, “Flattery will not get you out of helping me. Now, let’s eat!! It’s already two in the afternoon.”

You both cleared the picnic mat, laying out the bread, butter, and fruits that you packed for your lunch. You eagerly dug into your food, savouring the taste of a nice meal after working hard all morning. 

Oh how Joshua adored you. You looked like a little bunny shoving the food in your mouth. You really knew how to enjoy all these simple pleasures in life. He really should watch his mouth better. He already slipped up earlier, calling you his gorgeous y/n. Now that you were both closer to each other, he didn’t want to do anything that might push you away. 

Swallowing another mouthful of food, you could feel Joshua’s eyes on you. Teasing him, you said, “Aren’t you going to eat? Or are you just going to stare at me, your gorgeous Y/n?”

Joshua scratched his cheek sheepishly, trying to cover up the fact that he was staring at you, “I wasn’t staring. I was… thinking. Yea, thinking. Actually, I was thinking, why do you always make so many crafts anyway?”

You looked at him, questioning his weird behaviour. Shrugging it off as another one of Joshua’s awkward episodes, you replied, “On the weekdays, I work at the Athenian agora. You know, the central market? I thought I mentioned this before at some point. Anyway, I sell these baskets and crafts to make a living.”

Your words floated through the wind, along with Joshua’s hum of understanding. You both fell back into a comfortable silence as you finished the remains of your meal. Shortly after, you saw that it was already time to go. You reluctantly pulled Joshua’s coat off your shoulders, though not before you took one last whiff of his comforting scent. Passing Joshua his coat, you began to repack your basket, “Same time and place next week?”

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The following week, you were sitting on your picnic mat working on a beaded bracelet waiting for Joshua to show up. He was late today, but you weren’t worried. Joshua did tell you that sometimes his daily naiad duties took longer than expected. 

Hearing a twig snap in the distance, you lifted your head from your basket, frowning slightly out of concern as Joshua approached you. You took in his disheveled appearance. He usually swept his bangs to the side, but today, he let his bangs cascade down his face, covering his eyes. Speaking of which, his eyes were downcast. Instead of the brightness that you saw in his eyes during your weekly meetings, he eyes just looked empty. 

“Shua?” You asked tentatively, unconsciously using a more affectionate nickname. 

Joshua let out a frustrated growl, ruffling his hair further. Beaded bracelet long forgotten, you shot up, rushing to grab Joshua’s hands, yelling, “Shua!! Shua! Stop it! You’ll hurt yourself!”

When he didn’t respond, with your hands still on his, you wordlessly guided him to sit down onto the picnic mat. Joshua was normally really good at controlling himself around you, but his emotions were heightened and all he wanted right now was to be wrapped in your embrace. He wriggled his hands free from your grip, diving towards you. You both landed on the picnic mat with a thud. 

As your brain rushed to process what just happened, you felt Joshua turn to bury his head against your stomach, and wrap his arm around your waist. You were taken aback by his actions. Sure, you both had gotten close enough that physical contact wasn’t uncommon. However, besides the occasional heat pat (or the few times Joshua would have to grab your hands/ arms to save you from injuring yourself), Joshua never initiated the physical contact. He must really be feeling bad today if he was initiating physical contact this intimate.  

Sighing, you twisted your body, shifting yourself slightly. Joshua let out a whine at your movement. You hushed him, “I’m moving to make us more comfortable.” 

Finally, when you both were in a more comfortable position, you began to run your fingers through his hair, untangling all the knots that formed during his little tantrum. 

“Bad day?” You probed lightly. 

“Yes.” Joshua replied, his voice muffled by the fabric of your chiton. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Not really. Let’s just say… I saw some old acquaintances… they… weren’t very nice to me in the past. They didn’t see me though.” Joshua mumbled. 

You felt your heart break at the hurt that laced his voice. Seeing them must have brought up bad memories for him. You couldn’t understand how anyone could be mean to Joshua. He didn’t deserve any of that. Respecting that he didn’t want to talk anymore, you simply hummed in response. 

You continued running your fingers through his hair. Joshua tightened his grip on your waist, “Y/n? Do you think we could just stay like this for a while?”

“Of course, we’ll stay like this as long as you need,” you cooed. 

At some point, Joshua’s grip had slackened, and his breathing became more rhythmic. You stared at his figure adoringly. He fell asleep. You weren’t pleased that Joshua had to relive his painful memories, but your heart fluttered with the knowledge that Joshua felt safe enough to be vulnerable with you. He didn’t have to be afraid to let his guard down when he felt himself breaking, because he knew that you were there to pick up all the broken pieces and hold him until he felt whole again. 

You soon lost track of how much time had passed. You were sure you both missed lunch, though you didn’t care. Joshua was resting so comfortably. His figure looked so peaceful that you didn’t want to wake him. Fortunately, you both landed pretty near your basket. With as little movement as possible, you grabbed your leather bound book and began to read. 

A long, long while later, Joshua’s eyes fluttered open. Where was he? Why did he feel so protected, like he was being shielded from the world? Why did this pillow he was hugging smell so nice? Content, he buried his head further into the pillow. As the fog in his brain began to clear, one thought came to his mind. Since when did he cuddle a pillow to sleep? His eyes shot open, pulling away from the pillow only to see that his ‘pillow’ was you. 

He blushed furiously, hiding his head in his hands. You giggled at his reaction, “good morning sleeping beauty. Or, well, good evening? You slept for quite a long time. It’s already four in the afternoon.”

Joshua groaned. It warmed his heart to know that you had stayed by his side for so long. Still, he was so embarrassed. Silently berating his heart that was still pounding, Joshua looked up at you. You were now sitting up cross legged, gazing at him fondly while holding your book in your hands. 

It was that book again. The one he always saw you reading. Joshua craned his neck trying to read the title of the book, bending in such an awkward position he almost tipped over. You let out a haughty laugh. Joshua pouted, sulking that he had once again embarrassed himself in front of you.

Regaining your composure, you extended the book towards Joshua, “Shua? You wanted to see this?”

Joshua gingerly took the book from you, “A compilation of popular quotes. Compiled by Y/n? You wrote this?”

You shook your head, “No, I just copied out some of my favourite quotes from all the books I read.”

Joshua flipped through the pages in awe, your elegant handwriting making the quotes stand out to him even more. You really had taken the effort to copy all your favourite quotes, many of which he had never seen before. 

“You can borrow the book if you want. I don’t exactly need it.” You offered.

“Really? But this is a one of a kind copy. It’s your prized possession. I couldn’t. What if something happened to it?” 

“I’m sure you’ll take good care of it. Besides, I always see you staring at this book. Since you’re so interested in it, I might as well lend it to you.”

“Are you sure?” Joshua hesitated. 

You shrugged your shoulders, “Sure. I trust you, just like you’ve shown you trust me.”

And just like that, when Joshua thought he could not fall for you any harder, those three words, “I trust you” proved him wrong. 

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“Y/N! I’m just saying. This quote doesn’t make sense to me. What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others? You can’t weave anything into the lives of others. That’s the Moirai’s job? They literally weave the fate of humans? Clotho will not be happy to know that her spinning job has been overtaken by this Pericles guy.”

“Shua. Seriously. It’s just a quotation, you don’t need to take it seriously.”

“But it doesn’t make sense.”

“Shua. Again. Don’t worry about it.”

Today, the peace of your little oasis was broken by the banter between you and Joshua. Ever since you lent him your book a few weeks ago, Joshua has been pestering you about how some of the quotations don’t make any sense to him. You were both amused and exasperated at how smart and just how dumb Joshua could be. Sometimes, you were able to carry out intelligent conversations about some of the quotes. Other times… they looked more like this. 

Joshua grumbled, “It makes no sense. You know what else makes no sense? This one.”

You looked at the quote which Joshua was pointing at written by Heraclitus - No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man. 

“What is it about this one then?” You ask.

“One, it's going to be the same idiot who decided that it would be a good idea to get into the river. Two, the river doesn’t change. It’s the same damn river.”

“Okay, so maybe it’s the same guy. But you of all people should know that the river is not the same. The water passes through it, just like what happens at this creek.” You retort. 

“No, it’s the water that is not the same. The river is the same. The name of the river is not going to change, and it’s the same river bank. Like this creek. The creek is always going to be called the Iremia creek. Only the water is different. Your human philosophers are trying too hard to write something profound in the simplest of things,” Joshua remarked rather smugly, seeing that he was able to poke holes at one of the quotations in your book. 

You rolled your eyes and stuck out your tongue playfully at him, “Fine, fine. You win this time.  Some friend you are though. We’ve been meeting here for what? Three months now? You never told me that this creek was named Iremia. Next thing I know, you’re going to tell me this is the creek you preside over and that as a human, I should be giving you offerings or worshiping you.”

Joshua raised his eyebrows at your playful remark, “actually, this is my domain… Just because those other narcissistic deities like their domains to be named after them doesn’t mean I do. I’m not naming my creek Joshua’s creek…”

“WHAT? SERIOUSLY? WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?” you shrieked, cutting him off abruptly. 

“I mean, it’s not like I go around advertising it. And no, I don’t expect humans to bow down to worship me. Honestly, it’s a stupid practice. Others engage in it just so they can dangle their power over you humans. Although… if you wanted to, I’m not opposed to it,” Joshua smirked. 

You lightly punched Joshua’s arm, “Hell no. Not even if Hades dragged me into hell.”

You began tapping your index finger against your cheek, another quirk of yours that Joshua noticed, one that you did when you were lost in thought. 

You mused, “I think Joshua’s creek or Shua’s creek would be pretty names. Your name means to save or to deliver. It makes sense because of your job directing fresh water to nearby towns. But I agree with your choice of name for this creek. Iremia is the perfect name. For such a breathtaking place, it lives up to what its name means. Serenity.”

Then, you suddenly turned to jab your finger accusingly at Joshua’s chest. You whined, “Still. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!”

“To be fair, you never asked.”

“Shua. I hate you.”

“No you don’t. You adore me.”

As soon as those words escaped his lips, you stared at Joshua, wide-eyed. You felt the heat rising to your head, you were sure your jaw dropped, and your heart began to beat wildly in your chest. 

With your head spinning, you sputtered indignantly, “So… so… so what if I do? Adore you… I mean.”

Now, it was Joshua’s turn to become a blushing, sputtering mess. His hands flew to cover his reddening face. He had mindlessly uttered those words in response to your remark, not expecting you to actually respond to it.

Joshua bashfully averted his eyes from yours, murmuring, “Do you really mean that?”

Your heart melted at his tentativeness. Slowly, you brought your index finger under his chin, lifting his head so you could look him in the eyes. When your eyes finally met his, you affirmed seriously, “I do. I adore you. So so so much.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Squealing, you slid down against your front door, curling up into a ball on the floor. You rubbed your palms against your cheeks, hoping that the coldness from your palms would calm the hot flush that hadn’t disappeared. Your mind was racing. Your heart was pounding. Adrenaline pumped through your veins. Did you really say that to Joshua? No, actually more specifically did you really say “I adore you” to Joshua while tilting his chin towards you just now? 

You let out a giddy shriek. YOU DID! That was practically your indirect, direct confession to Joshua. Gods, you liked Joshua. He was just so handsome, so sweet, so quirky, so unpredictable, so delicate, so gentle, so shy, so bold, so reserved, so mysterious. You liked all of his qualities, as contradictory as they might seem. 

You swooned thinking about the changes in his personality between the time when you first met and your meeting this afternoon. He opened up to you, he joked around with you, he was comfortable enough to initiate physical contact (or affection?) with you. Best of all, he was growing to become more and more confident in himself. Those walls that he built, the same ones you had been chipping at slowly? They crumbled enough for you to squeeze your way in. And those scars and wounds that Joshua bore? You patched them up with as much love and care as you could. Perhaps you were giving yourself too much credit, but you couldn’t help it. At the end of the day, you were the reason why Joshua looked happier, why there was more life in his eyes than ever before, why he walked with a spring in his step, why he no longer averted his eyes when talking about himself (most of the time anyway). Joshua was breaking out of his shell, and you couldn’t be more proud of him. 

Honestly? Romance had been the last thing on your mind. Since you were in your teens, your primary goal was to earn a living. Sure, your parents left you with enough for you to live comfortably, but you didn’t want to rely on their money. Between work and educating yourself, socialising and by extension being in a romantic relationship was not what you prioritised. Then you met Joshua. Initially, you thought that you simply wanted to help his injured soul heal. You were wrong. As you grew closer, Joshua intrigued you, he captivated you. You liked him in his entirety, he had pulled you in until he was all you could think about. 

Joshua believed Pericles’ quote made no sense, though you had a different perspective. Like it or not, people were able to weave themselves into the lives of others. Joshua is a great example of that. Your lives were now intertwined, tightly you might add. Everywhere you looked, in unexpected actions, you saw traces of Joshua, and the times you spent together. The baskets and jewelry you sold, the freshly baked bread from the market, quotes that you came across. Crystals. The vastness of the sky. Gold arm bands. Bunnies. The colour blue. Feathery blades of grass. Black hair. The stars littered across the sky. Water. Puddles. Morning dew. Rain. The scent of petrichor that wafted through your nose after heavy rainfall. Everything reminded you of Joshua. 

Ah. Maybe the word like was putting it lightly. You loved Joshua. 

When that realisation set in, you screeched, loudly pounding your fists against your floor boards. 

“Y/N?? ARE YOU OKAY? I HEARD THE SCREAMS OF A DYING ANIMAL!!” Minghao burst into your house, literally taking your front door off its hinges. He flung the door away, which meant that since you were crouched in front of the door, you were flung along with your poor door to the side. 

You yelped at the force of being thrown. Regaining your bearings, you scowled at Minghao, who at least had the decency to pretend to cower under the intensity of your gaze, “There was no animal you moron. It’s just me. This is the fourth time this month that you’ve come running in here, taking my door out in the process. Gods, and do I have to remind you to be gentle? I get you’re a super powered spirit but I’m only a human! I’m too cute and delicate to be thrown around like that.”

Minghao snorted, “Cute and delicate are not words I would use to describe you. Not after those animalistic screeches you let out. Please, if you are cute and delicate, then I am beauty personified, Aphrodite herself.”

You huffed, rubbing your butt to soothe the ache of landing on it. 

“You’re late by the way. You’ve been arriving home later and later on the weekends. I’m not going to lie, it’s worrying. Don’t forget that there are wild animals in those forests you have to trek through,” Minghao notes, his tone much softer this time. 

You chuckled sheepishly, “Uh, right. Sorry about that. I’ve been… distracted? Yea, that’s the word, I lose track of time when I’m by the Iremia creek.”

Minghao gawks at you.

“What? Oh yea, I just learned the name of the creek today! Iremia. Pretty right?” You chirped, unaware of the feeling of terror that rushes over Minghao.

Minghao lunges forward, grasping your arms a little too tightly, horror and worry etched on his face, “Why would you go there? Are you okay? You’re okay? Please please please tell me you’re okay.”

Stunned by Minghao’s outburst, all you could manage was a small squeak and a nod of your head. 

Although relieved, Minghao’s grip only tightens, “Out of all the creeks in Athens, why would you choose to go to that one? I can’t believe it. What am I going to do with you?”

“Is something wrong with it? It’s been nice…” you stammer, your voice trailing off. In all the years you’ve known Minghao, he has never reacted like this before. 

Minghao sighs, finally letting go of your arms, “For one. You have to push through the dense forest just to get there. Which again, has dangerous wild animals.”

“Pshh that’s nothing,” you boast, cutting Minghao off. 

Minghao glares at you, irritated that he was being interrupted, “Fine. But how about the fact that it backs up onto the Nomia mountains.”

“What is a Nomia?” you ask. 

“Shhhhhh. I’m getting to that. You are an impatient, ditzy human.”

You make a face at him, but Minghao ignores you, continuing his story, “I actually can’t believe you don’t know who she is. Nomia is the most infamous, wretched, selfish, downright wicked nymph there is. She’s an extremely powerful Oread, a mountain nymph. You’ve seen how expansive the mountains are. It’s a reflection of her power. She likes to toy with humans who don’t worship her. If you aren’t licking her feet, she will put a curse on you. I heard a story where she turned a man into stone because he refused to be her lover. She’s dangerous y/n. Why would you go there? I thought I told you NEVER to walk on the path leading to the left.”

You pouted, apologetically admitting, “Heh? Hao, you always say left and right this, left and right that. Blah blah blah. I’m not the best with instructions or directions if you haven’t noticed. How was I supposed to know. I guess I got confused. That does explain why people always give me weird looks when I venture into that part of the forest. BUT! You can’t blame me for going back. That creek is perfect. A real gem. Besides, I’ve never run into this Nomia. It’s not her creek.”

“Still. She’s dangerous. You shouldn’t go back. It’s not worth the pain that comes should you have to face her fury.”

“You? Minghao, the spirit of opportunity has reservations about me going to this place? You’re telling me I should not grasp the opportunity I have to enjoy that place to the fullest? I can’t believe the day has finally come for you to dissuade me from doing something.”

“Y/n. I want to protect you. Believe me please. It’s not worth it.” Minghao seethes. 

You look down, tracing patterns on the floor boards that seem to be more interesting at this moment. You think back to all the good times you spent near the Iremia creek. You loved it even before you met Joshua. Joshua… he was there. The fact that he was there was enough for you to throw Minghao’s warnings out the window completely. You would go to the ends of the earth to meet Joshua. The risks didn’t matter. You would take the risk. Joshua was worth it.

“But it is,” you whisper dreamily. 

Minghao groans, finding himself unable to scold you further when he sees a contented, dreamy look spread across your face. You looked happy. 

“Fine. At least do me a favour? Promise me you’ll be careful. And whatever you do. Do not. I repeat. Do not talk to any nymphs or naiads in that area. You don’t know if any of them are affiliated to Nomia, or if they are Nomia.” Minghao sighs, accepting that you weren’t going to stop visiting the Iremia creek. 

You gave him a dopey smile and saluted him, agreeing to his terms outwardly. You would heed his advice and not talk to any other nymphs. Joshua on the other hand? You knew him. He was more of a lone wolf amongst the nymphs. He was definitely male which meant he was not Nomia. You were one hundred percent going to continue talking to Joshua. You trusted him. Plus, Joshua never mentioned anything about being affiliated to Nomia. So yes, you were safe with him. Right?

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

At that moment, as you gleefully daydreamed about what your future meetings with Joshua would bring, back near the creek, Joshua was storming into his own house with hot angry tears streaming down his face. 

Joshua had returned home in high spirits, his head in the clouds. The moment you flustered him by saying you did adore him was replaying in his head on a loop. However, when he approached his house, a shrill voice rang out, “Joshua Hong Jisoo? Where have you been? I’ve been waiting for you here.”

Annoyed that his good mood was about to be ruined again, Joshua gritted his teeth, “Nowhere… I’ve been out. Doing chores. Some of us nymphs have to exert extra energy to carry out our tasks.”

The owner of the voice laughed haughtily, emerging from the shadows, “You see. You say that, but I can practically smell the human on you. You reek. So I’ll ask again. Where have you been?”

“Nowhere. I told you. I was doing chores. I have to go into town for that. Obviously I would be surrounded by humans,” Joshua spat.

“Giving me attitude are you? Don’t you dare speak to me this way!”

After the day Joshua had, all he wanted to do was to go home, and dream of you. Obviously, that wasn’t going to happen now. Joshua rolled his eyes, refusing to entertain this nonsense. He brushed past the figure roughly. 

Joshua stormed into his house, the figure’s grating voice still following him. She barked, “YOU BELONG TO ME JOSHUA HONG JISOO. I. OWN. YOU. I swear I will find out why you’re acting this way and who you’re hanging out with. You’ll regret pushing me away. Whoever you were with will pay for getting in my way. They are turning you away from me. No one. And I mean no one. Messes with what belongs to me. Nomia.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

“As I was saying, the Panathenaea festival is coming up. It’s going to be so fun! I can’t believe it’s already nearing the end of summer! We spent the whole summer together. Can you believe that Shua? This festival is held once every four years to celebrate Athena and some other Gods. There’s sports and music performances. I don’t really care for all that, but I really want to try all the sweets that are made of honey. It’s a special delicacy…”

You continued to drone on and on, waving your arms about animatedly. You weren’t particularly fond of other festivals. Those were too hedonistic for your liking. The Panathenaea festival was different. It was more of a communal celebration rather than just a ritual for the Gods. It was a time when the Athenian community would gather to partake in the games together. In this festival, humans were supposed to enjoy it as much as the Gods it was held for. 

However, in your excitement, you didn’t notice that Joshua wasn’t listening to you at all. He was still incredibly shaken after encountering Nomia the previous week. While he nodded along to your babbles, the words weren’t registering in his brain. His mind was distant, yet still extremely alert. He wasn’t going to deny that he was extra jumpy today. His senses were in overdrive. The buzzing of the bee, the water rushing down the creek, the water droplets from the morning mist, the distant howl of a wolf in the forest, Joshua heard, and felt it all. He was on edge. He felt like a sitting duck, waiting for something, someone, to interrupt your peaceful time together. 

Truthfully, Joshua was terrified of meeting you today. He was worried that Nomia would follow him, or send someone to follow him. He didn’t want to put you at risk. You were in enough danger as it was if Nomia found out you were the human he was spending his weekends with. The logical plan would have been to avoid you, to break all contact with you. Alas, the heart wants what it wants. You were his escape, the only one he had and could rely on in this cruel world. With that, Joshua found himself unable to stay away from you. 

“Shua? Shua!! Hello? I’ve been calling your name for the past thirty seconds. Are you okay? You’re looking kind of, uhm, how do I put this lightly… Your face is all twisted, like you're disturbed by something. Is it something I said?” 

Your voice startled Joshua, causing him to jump from his sitting position into a defensive position. Instantly, he pushed you behind him, standing in front of you protectively. His eyes darted around frantically. He was looking out for danger. It was strange, he didn’t feel any ominous presence around the two of you. Nevertheless, whisps of pale blue light danced around his finger tips. Regardless of how overpowered the others might be compared to him, Joshua was ready to unleash all his powers to defend you. He would defend you to his dying breath. 

Confused and a little freaked out at Joshua’s actions, you grabbed onto the fabric of Joshua’s chiton, ducking behind him and squeezed your eyes shut. After a couple of seconds, you lifted your head, peaking at your surroundings from behind Joshua. There was nothing wrong? No danger at all? 

Calming yourself down, you rubbed circles around Joshua’s back in an attempt to soothe him, “Shua. Calm down. There’s no danger around us.”

You felt him stiffen at the contact. You continued your actions, reassuring him by repeating the words, “It’s okay. We’re okay. You’re okay. I’m okay.” until his form relaxed a little. 

Hesitantly, you asked, “Shua? Is everything okay?”

Joshua let out a shaky breath, murmuring, “No no, nothing is wrong.”

Liar. You wanted to say. No one has that kind of reaction if nothing is wrong. You looked at him doubtfully. You opened your mouth, wanting to comment about his reaction, but you didn’t have the heart to. Joshua’s appearance was haggard. He was inhaling and exhaling deeply, trying to calm himself down. You could still see a sliver of the pale blue light around his fingers. He was still on edge. He was trying to convince you as much as he was trying to convince himself that you were both okay, that there was no danger around you. 

Deciding to let him go this time so as to not rattle Joshua further, you brushed over his reaction, opting to return to what you had been talking to him about previously, “Uhm. So as I was saying. Are you going to the Panathenaea festival? I don’t know how you naiads celebrate it. Do you gather with the others? Meet distant relatives or something?”

Unfortunately, though you were trying to lighten the mood, your words had the opposite effect on Joshua as he tensed up. His mood souring even further. He scoffed, “No I don’t plan on partaking in that stupid festival. I don’t have anyone to celebrate it with anyway.”

“Oh… uhm… that’s fine. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea I guess. I don’t really have anyone to celebrate it with either. I just go for the vibes you know? It’s the one day of the year people are more accepting of everyone in the community.” You stammer.

An awkward silence fell upon you both. Seeing your dejected expression, Joshua grimaced. You were so excited about the festival and his bad mood only served to make you feel bad as well. Joshua wrecked his brain, trying to think of something, anything to say to make you feel better. But the more he thought about the festival, the more infuriated he became. All his brain seemed to be able to fixate on was the fact that he would be alone. Then he thought back to all the times he saw you alone near the creek, that content look on your face when you were by yourself. He was green with envy. How did you do it? It wasn’t fair. 

The anger and jealousy bubbling in his chest, Joshua spitefully blurts, “I don’t know how you can be so okay with being alone. It never seems to bother you at all. I’m all alone and I hate it. I’m not powerful. All I can do is manipulate water a little, maybe heal small cuts. It’s enough to direct fresh water towards the neighbouring cities. But for me it takes so much effort. I don’t possess any of the other famed healing powers, or prophetic powers naiads are supposed to have. In addition to being a failure of a naiad, I’m a freak of nature. Male naiads are extremely rare, they aren’t supposed to exist. Right now I believe I’m the only one in existence. Everyone either ridicules me or wants to use me for their political gain. No one truly cares for me in that community.”

Clenching his fists, Joshua continues bitterly, “I have no family. I’m all alone.”

After Joshua’s tirade, he looks at you expectantly. Your heart went out to him. Under the anger, jealousy, and bitterness that laced his voice, under his accusatory gaze, you could hear and see his plea for answers. He was exhausted, drained. He wanted to know, no, he needed to know how you coped. 

You contemplated on what to say for a while. Breathing in deeply, you say softly, “I wouldn’t say that being alone doesn’t bother me at all. I do get lonely. It’s not like I don’t talk to people. I try my best to be outgoing when I’m working in the marketplace. But that’s how I make a living. Other than that… Shua, I get it you know. What it’s like being an outsider within the community that you live in. Everyone either shames you or wants to be friends with you. I get it, I understand how you feel. Aside from you and Minghao, I don’t have any friends. I’m not actually an Athenian citizen. I’m a Metic, a foreigner who lives in Athens.”

You pause, looking at Joshua to gauge his reaction. You were slightly afraid that Joshua would see you differently once you revealed your identity to him. Metics weren’t usually treated kindly or seen positively by most Athenians and deities. 

Relieved when the only reaction you received was an emotionless blink, you continued, “My heritage and identity guarantees that regardless of how long I live in Athens, I lie outside of Athenian society. They don’t accept me because of where I come from, who I am. Metics, our wealth is usually passed onto us from our families. For those who know, they don’t see me as a genuine friend. They see me as someone to leech off given the change, someone to try and manipulate. I don’t have any family here so like you, I’m alone. I have to stand up for myself. It’s just, after so much time of being alone, I’ve come to terms with it? I’m at peace with it. I’m different from others, and that’s okay. I am who I am, I can’t control or change that. What I can control is who I surround myself with. I rather be alone than be manipulated or treated like dirt.”

Taking in your words, hearing that in a way, you were an outcast like him, the last of Joshua’s walls crumbled. He knew you were one of the most accepting people he would ever meet. Since the first time he met you, you accepted him for who he was. You never judged him for being different from other naiads. You never judged him for being weaker, for making self-deprecating comments. In fact, you took his words and turned them around, finding beauty in his abilities. You constantly affirmed him, made him feel appreciated, loved. You wanted him to see how beautiful, and perfect he was, flaws and all. You always longed for him not only to see himself how you saw him, but to believe in himself, just as you believe in him. Honestly, Joshua thought that it was weird that you thought so highly of him. He wondered why you were so accepting. Now, he knew. You were different too. 

“Also Shua? We’re not always born into the family we want, nor are we always blessed to live within a community we want. It’s also easier said than done for us to uproot our whole lives to get a fresh start. Sometimes that’s just not possible. But the good thing is, like I said, we can try to control who we want to surround ourselves with. We can make our own family.”

Joshua’s head snaps up, his eyes meeting yours, you flush, shyly offering, “Since we’re two familyless outcasts, if you want, I’ll be your family.”

Joshua stares at you in disbelief, “Really?” 

His question, though seemingly simple, reflected all the emotions that flashed through his eyes. There was the shock that you would even offer. Hesitation, doubt, and caution, which were instinctual given years of alienation and his experiences of being manipulated, perhaps you wanted something more from him. He was also afraid of being let down. But Joshua knew you had no malice in your words, you were sincere. He trusted you as much as you trusted him. So finally, his eyes shone with hope and gratitude. 

You scrunch your nose, stating in a matter of fact tone, “Not to be that annoying person, but I should point out that Euripides once said that love is all we have, the only way we can help the other.”

You nodded your head seriously after, though the seriousness was broken by the upturned corners of your lips, and the crinkles at the corners of your eyes. Since Joshua’s eyes were so bright, you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling, having already (accurately) predicted what Joshua’s answer would be. As sincerely as you could, you said, “I would be honoured to be your family.”

A deep blush spreads across Joshua’s face, and he whispers, content and happy, “Okay. We’ll be our own little family. Just you and me.”

Joshua thought no one would understand him, the loneliness, emptiness, alienation, discrimination that he felt. Then you came along, revealing the most personal aspects of yourself to him. Your words brought him an immense amount of relief. It was as if you extended your hand to him, pulling him up from drowning in his loneliness. For so long, he punished himself, blaming himself for not fitting on, for not having a family, for being an outcast. But the thing is, he didn’t need to. All Joshua needed to do was to find his own family, one that accepted him for who he was, and one that didn’t condemn him for who he wasn’t.  𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Since that fateful day when you both swore to be each other’s family, you and Joshua became closer than ever. All the walls Joshua built to protect himself now lay in ruins, making way for you to deliver as much love, affirmation, and affection as possible into his heart. As Joshua thought about all this and what you have done for him, his heart fluttered. He felt eternally grateful and indebted to you. 

Before, he was broken. Going through the motions of life was tedious, and regardless of how much effort he put into his duties, it was never enough. But you certainly healed him. You taught him that titles and labels didn’t define who he was and how he should be living his life. Spending time with you, you helped him to learn that life wasn’t so bad. In fact, life was palatable. He learned to find joy in all the little things like taking in the ethereal scenery, listening to the light trickles of the water, sharing a meal with someone you loved, even weaving baskets in comfortable silence. Life was worth living. 

At the same time, you were also relieved and grateful that Joshua didn’t make a fuss about your foreign heritage and identity. It was hard for you to open up about these things. In the past, every time you had, it backfired. However, Joshua was different. He wasn’t a hypocrite, he wouldn’t have cast you aside just for that. You were ashamed of yourself for even thinking that he would. You really should have given Joshua more credit. Afterall, you were both two misfits in the same pod. 

When you were both together, labels were mostly irrelevant. The creek had been a space you carved out for yourself, an escape and a place of refuge from life in the Athenian capital. Now, you saw the creek as a space that you and Joshua carved out for yourselves, a space you both could be yourselves. “Misfits”. “Outcasts”. “Joshua the male naiad”. “Y/n the metic”. Who you were in your respective communities didn’t matter here. When it was just the two of you, within that little oasis next to the Iremia creek, you both were simply Joshua, and Y/n. 

The only time labels were still a tiny bit important for you both, was when you were trying to describe your relationship with each other. You were certainly best friends, and each other’s confidants. And above all else, you could describe your relationship as a found family. 

However, neither of you could deny that you definitely wanted something more to happen between you. The gentle, feathery touches between you that left the butterflies in your stomach fluttering in a frenzy. The tender, fond, love-filled gazes that you exchanged with Joshua. All the playful banter that bordered on flirting, all the times you both actually flirted with each other. These were just some of the pieces of evidence that proved there was a romantic attraction and connection between you and Joshua.

Honestly? It was obvious to the two of you that you loved each other. But neither of you wanted to openly acknowledge those feelings. More than anything, because you were certain that you did love each other, the explicit acknowledgement of those feelings would make things real. It would mean that you would have to discuss it, things might change. Perhaps it would be the more light-hearted, playful dynamics? The way you go about your meetings? The future? (And of course, Joshua was afraid of what Nomia would do if she found out). So, you had an unspoken mutual agreement that you wouldn’t ever venture a step into that direction. 

For the sake of maintaining the status quo, you and Joshua would just continue to feign ignorance, pretending that your budding romance wasn’t anything more than a light drizzle rather than what it really was - a heavy downpour. 

The only thing was, this downpour wasn’t one that would eventually fade away. It was one that would continue to build, roaring and howling away until it was a torrential rainstorm that threatened to wreck havoc at some point in the near future. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Annoyance. That was all you felt. Exhaling sharply, you turned away from Joshua, refusing to look into those adorable, large, doe eyes. If you did, you knew you would crumble straight away. But right now, you wanted to stand your ground firmly. Joshua had crossed a delicate line. He should never have said it. He knew he shouldn’t, and he said it anyway. There was absolutely no way you were going to forgive him for what he said. 

“Y/nnnn,” Joshua whined, poking at your sides. He still didn’t understand the severity of what he said, and you weren’t going to let him go that easily. He needed to learn that his words had consequences.

Casting a quick glare at Joshua, you crossed your arms, harrumphing and looking away. You wouldn’t give in to him today, no matter how hard he pleaded.

“Y/nnn…” Joshua tried again. When he saw that you had no reaction, he moved in front of you. He kneeled down, rubbing his hands together. He pouted, widening his doe eyes wider than normal, knowing that that always wore down your defenses. Alas, his move had no effect on you because you squeezed your eyes shut tightly. 

Pursing his lips together, Joshua decided that he would make one last attempt to get your attention. He was going to bring out the big guns. If this didn’t work, then he would give up, admit defeat, and walk away until you were ready to speak to him again.

Opening his mouth, Joshua cooed tenderly, “Darling…” 

Damn. He was really giving it his all. This was the first time he called you by this affectionate nickname. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Your heart fluttered at his voice, begging you to open your eyes so you could look at him. You tried as hard as you could to fight off the smile that was starting to spread across your face, your defenses cracking. 

Seeing your demeanor falter, Joshua tried once again, cooing, “Darling… My darling y/nnnn…”

Cursing your huge soft spot for Joshua and his use of that nickname, your defenses were completely defeated. You cracked your eyes open, seeing Joshua giving you an adorable eye smile. He was beaming at you, happy that he managed to win you over. 

You scrunched your nose, still unwilling to completely give in to him, “I’m still angry with what you said. Don’t think you calling me darling is going to make this go away.”

“Really? Because I think it was really effective,” Joshua teased. 

“Shua! You called that basket I made ridiculous!” You exclaimed, picking up the tiny little basket you weaved, cradling it to your chest. 

“But it is!”

“Is not!”

“Is too!”

“Shua! Is not!”

“Is too! Darling, what can you even put in that? It’s two centimeters in diameter.” Joshua retorted. 

You gave Joshua a deadpan expression, raising your finger to tell him to wait as you fished around your larger basket for something. Once you found it, you looked smugly at Joshua, dropping it into the tiny mini basket.

“Darling. That’s a walnut.” Joshua stated.

“So?”

“It’s one singular walnut.”

“Yea.” You nodded proudly. 

“I stand by my original statement. It’s ridiculous.” 

You clicked your tongue at him, “No, it’s practical and cute. You don’t appreciate art.”

Joshua rolled his eyes at you, but nodded along, half-heartedly agreeing with what you said to get you off his back. 

Needing to get in the last word, you blurted, “It’s cute. That’s final. Unlike someone when he first stumbled out of the bushes over there. You looked like a fawn trying to walk for the first time.”

Joshua reeled back in horror, “You promised never to talk about that! It’s embarrassing.” 

You shrugged, “All’s fair in love and war.”

Puffing his cheeks, Joshua muttered some curses under his breath that even Hades would blush at. You laughed. It was always fun to get Joshua riled up because he would never openly curse at you. He had too much patience and was too much of a gentleman. 

Actually, speaking of your first meeting, there was something you were always curious about but never brought up. 

“Shua? I’ve always wondered, what were you doing behind those bushes anyway?”

Joshua stiffened. After speaking to you and getting closer to you, he forgot that he had spied for weeks. You never brought it up before, and he pushed that memory to the back of his mind. Perhaps it was time to come clean with you. What’s the worst that could happen? Oh right, you might be extremely put off by him. You could potentially call him a creep and storm off…

Joshua gulped, “Honestly? I was watching you. The first time I saw you, you completely captivated me. Then you kept returning, and it made me curious… so you know… I decided just to watch you until I could figure out why I was so attracted to you.”

Putting his hands up in surrender, Joshua was quick to try and explain his actions. “It was Jeonghan! He told me that the only way for me to figure out why you were so alluring was to just watch you! I swear I wasn’t trying to be a creep. Well… I was being a creep… No. What I meant to say was… I didn’t mean any harm… Uh… Nevermind that. I’m sorry???” Joshua squeaked, completely flustered. 

You gawked at Joshua, shocked that one, he had practically been stalking you, and two, he basically just confessed that he was attracted to you. 

Joshua swallowed thickly. You were just gawking at him. And yea, he deserved it, but he felt himself shrinking and shifting uncomfortably. 

Finally, electing to conveniently ignore Joshua’s confession. You fixated on his stalker-esque behaviour, asking, “Uhm.. well, was I at least fun to watch?”

“What…” Joshua was stumped, “Wait… that’s your response? No yelling, no screaming, no shouting pervert! Or creep! What happened to having normal reactions!” 

You looked at Joshua expectantly, replying smoothly, “Who said I was normal? Besides, I think if you meant to harm me, you would have done it a long long time ago. You mentioned once that naiads are naturally curious. I guess I can’t exactly fault you for that. But I would like to know. Was it fun to watch me?”

Joshua nodded, still speechless. 

Satisfied, you snickered at him, “Who knew huh? Mr. Gentleman has a naughty side.”

Joshua laughed, getting up from his sitting position. He inched closer to you, reaching out to wriggle his fingers at you, “Naughty? I’ll show you.”

You screeched, springing up from your seat. You nervously inched away from Joshua before running off in the opposite direction, yelling, “You’ll have to catch me first!”

Immediately, Joshua sprinted after you, laughing maniacally along the way. Every time he neared you, he reached out, trying to grab onto your arm. But you were faster, managing to evade his grip. 

Your laughter floated through the air melodically. You looked so happy, so carefree, just running around across the big open field as the wind brushed past your face. Joshua instinctually slowed down, staring at you in awe. 

Noticing Joshua was some distance away from you, you stuck out your tongue at him, teasing him lightly, “Shua, for a big strong naiad, you’re kind of slow.”

Snapping out of his daze, Joshua lunged forward suddenly. He caught you off guard and was able to wrap his hands around your arms. Bringing you closer to him so your body was flush against his, he breathed in a low voice, “Who’s slow now?”

Your brain stopped working. Joshua was close enough that you could feel his breath against your face. You could feel his firm muscles against your body. You knew he was sculpted like a Greek god, but you didn’t know he was this muscular. And did he always smell this strongly of petrichor? Your senses were buzzing. Blood rushed to your face. You flushed under his half-lidded, alluring gaze, and his teasing. Your heart was running a thousand miles per minute. You felt your lungs constrict. You held your breath, not daring to breathe or move, afraid that if you did, Joshua would realise the hold he had on you. 

That said, you were sure that your proximity meant he could feel the rapid thumping of your heart. And you weren’t sure if your senses were playing tricks on you, because for a moment, you swore you could feel Joshua’s heart doing the exact same thing.

Just as you thought you were going to overheat and combust, your moment with Joshua was interrupted by a sudden flash of lightning followed by the jarring rumbling of thunder in the distance. You felt a few water droplets fall on your head. Looking around, you were a little disoriented that there might be an incoming storm despite the seemingly clear, sunny skies. Looks like Zeus was in one of his moods again. 

Breathing a sigh of relief at the escape the incoming storm provided you from that nerve wracking moment with Joshua, you wriggled around in Joshua’s grip, whining, “Shua, we really should get out of here. There’s going to be rain.”

Your wriggling proved to be futile. Joshua kept a firm grip on you, “there’s no rush darling.”

“Shua! Seriously, we’re going to get wet!”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head darling. We’ll be fine even with the rain coming.”

You scoffed, “easy for you to say. You can’t get sick, but I will. Human. Remember?”

Joshua shook his head at your protests, “In case you hadn’t noticed darling, it’s already pouring.”

Loosening his grip on you slightly, Joshua nodded upwards, gesturing for you to take a closer look at your surroundings. Confused, you let your eyes trail upwards, following Joshua. 

Gasping, you were utterly in awe at the sight you were met with. There was something like a barrier sheltering you from the downpour, something transparent. It was almost like a bubble, but one that only enveloped you and Joshua. Beyond that, the heavy downpour continued.

Upon closer inspection, the rain droplets around you appeared as though they were suspended in the air. It wasn’t that there was a dome around you. Rather, the rain droplets were being directed around you in a dome-like shape. This made the droplets look akin to a gorgeous, extravagant, crystal chandelier. Similar to the sparkles that you loved so much when you observed the water on the creek’s surface, each of the rain droplets sparkled under the light. Together, they emitted a pale blue shimmer. The colour was familiar to you, reminiscent of the colour that you always saw when Joshua used his powers. 

Looking at Joshua’s hands that were still gripping your sides, a similar faint glow could be seen around his fingers. Putting two and two together, you realised that Joshua was using his abilities to keep the two of you dry. That was why the scent of petrichor was so strong. In a way, you were right to note that the scent came from Joshua, though it was due to him using his powers and not the proximity of your bodies. Seems like it had been raining for a while, you were just too preoccupied going crazy over more important things (Joshua’s body against yours) that you were completely unaware of your surroundings. 

Noticing that you understood what was going on, Joshua hushed you, “Hush now darling. Now you see why there’s no rush? We’re perfectly dry here.”

You nodded, still speechless. The little dome you were in with Joshua was beautiful. Enthralled by the sight, you raised a finger out, gingerly trying to touch a suspended water droplet. You giggled when the droplet still splashed against your finger. Out of curiosity, you stuck a hand outwards, wondering what would happen if your hand went out of the little dome Joshua created. You squealed when you felt the cold rain water hit your hand. Obviously, outside the dome, the rain water continued to fall as per normal. 

You snickered when you heard Joshua sigh in loving exasperation. You wiped your wet hand on Joshua’s chiton, ignoring his protests. Then, you continued to observe your surroundings with child-like awe and glee, commenting, “It’s beautiful.”

“You are.” Joshua murmurs mindlessly, his eyes never leaving your form.

As always, Joshua had been watching you from the background as you went about exploring and observing the space around you. This reminded him of the reasons why he was so inexplicably drawn to you in the first place. Your bright eyes. The ones that were so clear, so filled with life, curiosity and wonder. Your eyes sparkled under the glow of the crystal-like water droplets. The corners of your eyes crinkled more and more as you became increasingly captivated by the rain droplets. 

He continued to watch you silently, feeling his heart melt and the butterflies in his stomach stir as you shot him appreciative, joyful glances. He remembered seeing you have that expression when you took in the scenery of the little oasis you were currently in. Now, you had that same expression while enjoying something with him, something that he created. More than that, Joshua recognised that your eyes reflected something more than appreciation and gratitude. Love. That was it. 

You looked at him like he created the whole world. That look, it was so full of love. It was directed at him. It was for him.

Of course he would recognise that look… It was the exact same look that he had, one that only appeared on his face when he looked at you. 

Not completely aware of what you had said, Joshua only picked up on the word “beautiful”. Beautiful. He didn’t think that that word could encapsulate how attractive he found you. But in his daze, while he was completely captivated by you, the word “beautiful” continued to be repeated in his head. It was the only word he could think of as he thought of you, and “you are” just slipped out before his brain registered what he should say in response to your remark. 

Stunned, your head snapped to look at Joshua. 

“Shua?” You asked, noticing his dreamy, dazed expression. 

Beautiful, Joshua thought, his eyes trailing down to stare at your lips which looked so inviting.  

Unable to control himself, Joshua removed his hand from your side, reaching upwards for your face. His touch as light as a feather, Joshua brushed his thumb against your face tenderly. While the feeling of his touch against your skin still lingered on, you felt him shift once again, only this time, he was gently pulling your head closer to his as he leaned towards your face slowly. Although his eyes were glazed over, you could see them flickering between your eyes, your face, and your lips. 

As you processed Joshua’s actions, time came to a stand still. You stood stiffly. Was this happening now? Was he going to kiss you? It’s not like you didn’t want to kiss him. Your heart yearned for Joshua’s touch, you yearned to be able to kiss him, to mold your lips to his. It was just a shock that Joshua was initiating it. 

Unconsciously, you closed your eyes, leaning into Joshua further until you could feel the outline of his face near yours, and until you could feel his warm breath. You both lingered in that position, each too hesitant to make the final move to connect your lips. 

Then, you felt your head being jerked forward. Joshua pushed your head towards his, just as he lunged forward. Before your brain registered the movement, Joshua’s lips were on yours. 

Just as Joshua’s lips reached yours in that electrifying kiss, all of Joshua’s feelings crashed down on him like a wave all at once. Your lips were so soft that Joshua wanted to melt into you, and he could taste the aftertaste of the honey filled desserts you liked on your lips. His heart fluttered, wanting more of you. He waited so long for this moment. 

But as he hungrily pressed his lips on your harder, he was immediately reminded of the fact that you couldn’t happen. The relationship between you and Joshua could not, and should not happen. It was dangerous. He already broke his own vow not to get close to you, not to fall for you. He wasn’t supposed to. Not falling for you, not interacting with you should have been the way. It was the best course of action to protect you. Fear filled his veins of what could happen to you if Nomia found out about you. The fear chilled him to the bone. You could be hurt, or worse. 

So, as fast as Joshua’s lips were on yours, as you felt the pressure of his lips on yours, they weren’t anymore. Your mind still hazy from the kiss, you opened your eyes when you felt Joshua pull away hastily. Dazed, you could only stare in confusion and hurt when you saw Joshua’s back turned towards you, his figure getting smaller and smaller as he ran through the rain away from you.

Your head reeled from the lingering feeling of Joshua’s lips on yours, and the cracks on your heart began to form. However, the moment you felt the world crashing down on you was when you vaguely heard his whisper of “sorry” floating through the wind. His voice crashing into you just as his hold over the water droplets broke, causing the harsh downpour to hit you all at once. 

Somehow, the pain and cold of the sudden rush of the howling wind, and the angry rain droplets pelting down on your skin didn’t matter to you. All you could feel at that moment was the unfathomable pain of your heart being shattered by Joshua as he left you there soaked in the rain, all alone. 

You didn’t know how long you stood there, alone under the pouring rain. You were numb to everything around you. Whether it was from the cold wind and rain pelting down on you, or the shock of Joshua kissing you and running away, you had no idea. At some point, everything went black. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Ugh, everything hurt and it was cold. Your arms, your back, your legs, your head. Why was everything so painful?

You shifted, trying to make yourself more comfortable and to soothe your aching body and the pounding in your head. Snuggling closer underneath the sheets that lay on top of your body, you inhaled their familiar scent, trying to get as much warmth as possible so you could slip back into your slumber.

Wait… sheets? The last thing you remembered was being out in the field next to the creek. Your eyes shot open. Immediately, you groaned, shutting your eyes again, regretting your decision as the light from the room burned your eyes and made the pounding in your head worse. You clutched your head in your hands, moaning in pain. 

“I see you’re up. You’re at home by the way. You’re welcome. And you have a high fever. That serves you right for standing out there in the rain.”

You cracked an eye open slowly, hissing at the light and at the person that the voice belonged to, “Shut up Hao. I’m in too much pain for your snarky comments.”

Minghao walked over, setting a cup of water and a steaming bowl of soup on your nightstand. He sat down next to you on your bed, your bed dipping under his weight. He placed a hand against your forehead, muttering, “your temperature is still high, but at least you’re awake.”

You slapped his hand away weakly, “yea i got that from the excruciating ache in my body.”

Shaking his head, Minghao scolded, “Y/n. This is serious. You were unconscious for almost 24 hours. I had to keep sponging your body to bring your temperature down. Even then, it’s still there.”

You sulked at Minghao’s scolding, but allowed him to help you sit up so you could take your medication and eat some soup. 

Shivering when your body left the warmth of the blankets, Minghao scooted onto the bed, wrapping his arm around you, providing you with as much body heat as you needed. Spirits and Greek deities usually had a higher body temperature than humans. You refused to eat the soup, your stomach still feeling funny after waking up. Minghao sighed, knowing how fickle and fragile humans were when they were sick. Instead, he shoved the cup of water in your hands, asking you to sip on that. 

Snuggling closer to Minghao, you rested your head on his shoulders and closed your eyes. You had only been awake for a few minutes and you were already exhausted. 

Just as you were dozing off once again, Minghao’s voice startled you, “You know, when you didn’t return home last night, I got worried and went to find you. Mind telling me about why you were lying unconscious by the Iremia creek running a high fever when I found you?”

You shook your head. You were tired and you didn’t want to go into the whole story with Minghao. He would be mad at you.

“Does it have anything to do with someone named Joshua?”

You stiffened, peeling your head away from Minghao’s shoulder. You said firmly, “I don’t know anyone named Joshua.”

Minghao exhaled sharply, trying to contain his anger, “Y/n, don’t bother trying to hide it from me. You were unconscious for 24 hours, or rather for most of it. The times you were awake, you were delirious. You kept crying for this guy, Joshua, asking why he was leaving you.”

With that, the dam broke. Your emotions, already heightened from what happened with Joshua, and from being sick, all bubbled up to the surface at once. You wailed, tears flowing uncontrollably as you spilled everything to Minghao. You told him everything that happened from the time you met Joshua to that moment when he left you in the rain. You told Minghao about all your feelings for Joshua, how much you loved Joshua, how much you adored him, and how much it hurt when he left you. 

During your little venting session, Minghao simply sat there with you in his arms, rubbing your back comfortingly. He might not approve of your actions or the fact that you hid all this from him, but what was done is done. He couldn’t change any of that. All he could do now was to be there for you. 

When you were done, you sniffled, wiping your snot with the back of your hand. Minghao gave you a disapproving glance, handing you a tissue before speaking, “I think when you’re well and only when you’re ready to, you should go back and talk to Joshua.”

Hearing that, you opened your mouth to protest. Minghao shushed you, “Despite what he did, from the way you talk about him, how he acts around you, how he treats you, I believe he does truly love you. There has to be a logical explanation as to why he acted in that manner, and I think you should go and talk to him to find out what it is. One, it is a way for you to confront him. Two, if nothing else, trying to talk to him, whatever the outcome, be it good or bad, it will give you closure.”

Letting Minghao’s words sink in, you murmured, “I don’t think I can face the pain of being rejected again.”

At that, Minghao squeezed you reassuringly, “Only do it when you’re ready. On top of that, the way that things played out, you weren’t exactly rejected. It’s just my personal advice, and call me biased for being a spirit of opportunity, but I really think you take this opportunity to hash out your feelings for each other. You should go back and talk to him.”

“What about that creek being dangerous?”

Minghao hummed thoughtfully, “Well the risk is always going to be there. And you still went back after I warned you. Just be careful and let me know when you go back.”

“Hao… I really don’t know…” you hesitated. 

“Do you love him?”

Minghao’s question threw you off guard, but you answered instantly, “Yes.”

“I won’t force you, but if that is your answer, I think you should trust me on this. For now though, rest. I’ll be here if you need me.” 

Minghao slipped out of your bed, laying you back down gently. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, closed the blinds, and left you alone to your thoughts. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

You mused over Minghao’s advice for the next four weeks. The first week after, Minghao refused to let you out of the house, telling you that you really needed to rest. You didn’t try to fight him. You were too weak to venture too far from home, and you didn’t feel ready to try and confront Joshua yet. The wound he inflicted on your heart still felt too raw. 

Then came the second week, the following week, and the week after that. Although you completely recovered by then, you didn’t feel ready to face Joshua. You pushed down your intrusive thoughts of all the possibilities of what might happen if you confronted Joshua. All the positive outcomes, negative outcomes, and everything in between were forced to the back of your mind. You really did try your best to go about your life, returning to your normal routines, selling crafts in the market, and having tea with Minghao. 

But the ache and pain of what happened remained. For all the times that you tried not to think about Joshua, memories of him forced themselves back into your mind two times stronger. It was funny. In the past, you used to relish in the giddy feeling of thinking about Joshua whenever any little thing you saw reminded you of him. The crafts, the water puddles, picnic baskets. Now, they acted as swords impaling in your side, painful memories that you just couldn’t shake no matter how hard you tried. 

The weekends were especially hard. The days that used to be full of chatter with Joshua by the Iremia creek in your little oasis were now full of you just trying to fill the time by distracting yourself. You missed that field, the scenery, the calming sounds of the water, the serenity of it all. Most of all, you missed Joshua. Yes, he hurt you, but you loved him. Minghao was right. By not doing anything to confront Joshua, you were only prolonging your own pain. You wanted to see him. You wanted to cry and yell, asking him why he did what he did. You needed to. 

Finally, after four weeks of wallowing in your own self-pity, you steeled your nerves. You grabbed your things, left a note for Minghao, and ventured back to the field.

Pushing through the last of the heavy foliage from the forest, you emerged back into the field. Unlike the other times when you felt emotional reprieve coming here, you still felt nervous and jumpy. 

Honestly? You weren’t even sure that you would find Joshua here. You knew Joshua would always be nearby, this being the creek he presided over. But would he want to see you? Would he be willing to talk to you? What if he never wanted to see you again? You shook your head. There was no point in entertaining those worries right now. What mattered was that you were here, trying to reach out to Joshua. 

Looking around and still not finding Joshua anywhere, you lay out your blue picnic mat and made yourself comfortable. There was no reason for you not to enjoy the clear skies today though that wasn’t the primary reason why you came. Opening a book, you decided to immerse yourself in an alternative universe to distract yourself while you waited for any signs of Joshua. 

Simultaneously, Joshua was tiredly making his way back from his duties. These past few weeks have been trying. The moment when his lips touched yours kept replaying in his head, as did the moment that he ran off. He was frustrated. He couldn’t believe he did that. The least he could have done was to talk to you, leaving you with some kind of parting words before he ran off. But no. He tucked his tail and ran. That was all he was good at anyway, being a coward. He chastised himself. His whole life, all he did was run away from his problems and fears instead of facing them head on. And now he hurt you deeply because of his cowardice. 

Despite knowing that you needed time, and that you probably didn’t want to see him, Joshua continued to make his way back to the creek after his duties to see if you were there. To his disappointment, for the past few weeks, you were not. However, today, as he approached the creek, he saw a figure sitting quietly in the field. Fearful that his eyes were deceiving him, he rubbed them to check if it was really you.

His heart almost leapt into his throat when he confirmed that it was you. He shuffled around behind the foliage awkwardly. It was almost as if he was back at square one again, hiding behind the bushes, too scared to approach you. Part of him wanted to run to you. He missed you terribly. But the other part of him was too afraid to. He was worried you would reject him. Lingering around, Joshua continued to battle his thoughts.

Rolling your eyes, you looked up from your book in the direction of the bushes. You knew Joshua was there as soon as he approached. He wasn’t especially quiet, and since you knew that he always came from direction, you were specially keeping an eye out for any movement. You were hoping that he would come out and make the first move. Well, it looks like you were going to have to do all the heavy lifting today.

You stormed over to the bushes, brushing them aside harshly. Joshua yelped, surprised at your sudden appearance. He shrank backwards under your glare. Nodding towards the field, you put your hands on your hips, waiting for Joshua to walk out from the bushes. This time, Joshua tried not to trip as he obediently walked towards your picnic mat. He didn’t want to embarrass himself even further. 

Once you both settled down on the mat, there was an awkward silence between you. You twiddled your thumbs, wondering how to broach the subject. You hadn’t thought about what to say to Joshua before this. You didn’t actually think you would get this far. 

“Shua…”

“Y/n…”

You both started at the same time. Joshua clamped a hand over his mouth, shutting up to let you speak first.

You began, “Shua… I… I just…”

You cleared your throat. Unable to get the words out, you settled for asking him a direct question, “Why?”

Joshua hesitated. You were really just ripping the bandaid off. Not meeting your eyes, Joshua said softly, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

“No. What you shouldn’t have done was kiss me and then run away. Right now, I don’t care about the kiss. I want to know why… why did you run?” you stated, hurt lacing your voice.

Joshua grimaced at your tone, “I… we… we can’t be together. It’s wrong. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t even have gotten close to you. It’s my fault.”

“I think that doesn’t matter right now. It’s obvious we both like each other. So if you say that, then explain it to me. What’s so wrong about it?” 

“I can’t. Please Y/n, you wouldn’t understand. I don’t want to hurt you.”

You glared at Joshua, “Don’t assume I wouldn’t understand anything. How would you know that if you won’t even give me a chance by explaining things to me?”

You were furious. How could he? After everything, he still didn’t think you would understand? 

You knew it would be a low blow, but you said it anyway to drive your point home, “Well I suppose it’s too late now if you didn’t want to hurt me. I did get hurt. I got sick because of you. I collapsed because of you. Because you left me there. I think I deserve an explanation. Whether you like it or not, I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s going on.”

Joshua felt another wave of shame wash over him. In his attempt to spare you from the pain, he ended up hurting you more. 

Repeating his earlier words, Joshua said, “We can’t be together.”

Fed up, you spat, “Yes. I’ve got that part. But explain it to me. I’ve never heard of any rules that forbid humans from being with naiads.”

Joshua shook his head, muttering, “You’re right. There are no rules against that. If that was the case, it actually wouldn’t be as complicated. It’s not that. It’s just… I really can’t be with you. You’re in enough danger as it is right now for having spent time with me.”

You rolled your eyes, “So I’ve been told. What about it?”

“You’re aware of who Nomia is?”

You nodded. 

“I’m bound to Nomia, and not just in the way that weaker nymphs are bound to stronger nymphs. Right when I came into existence, as a male naiad, she claimed me as hers. Y/n, I’m promised to her. I’m supposed to marry her some years in the future. I can’t leave her, ever. The only way is for her to break the engagement, which would never happen. Don’t you see? You’re in danger. She’s possessive. She will hurt whoever dares come between me and her. Right now, that’s… you. That’s why… we can’t be together.” Joshua revealed, his voice getting louder with each word before faltering near the end. 

Your mind reeled. You took a minute to process all that information. He was engaged? No. It wasn’t a consensual engagement. He was promised to Nomia, probably as some power play. That was the wicked, infamous nymph that Minghao warned you about. You were beginning to see why Minghao warned you not to interact with any naiads in the area. 

Seeing that you were speechless, Joshua began to rise from his seat, “Y/n… darling… I love you. I really do. With all my heart. But we really cannot be together. We shouldn’t keep meeting either… You’re always welcome here. We just shouldn’t meet again. Ever.”

As he turned his back to you, you hand shot out. You grabbed his wrist, preventing him from walking away from you once again. 

In a low voice devoid of emotion, you said, “Who says I’m letting you go that easy?”

“Darling…” Joshua begged, gently trying to remove your hand from your wrist. 

You growled, “I wasn’t finished. What I meant to say was, if you think Nomia is going to scare me off, then you’re mistaken.”

Joshua’s eyes widened in fear, “Darling. Please. She’s very dangerous.”

“Then why don’t we run away? You’ve mentioned that some naiads can travel across all bodies of water. Let’s run. We can be together then? Isn’t that simpler?”

Shaking his head, Joshua explained brokenly, “Darling, I really can’t. I’m not that kind of naiad… I’m not powerful enough. If I leave this area for too long, I’ll die…”

Gripping onto Joshua’s wrist tighter, you pulled him back down to sit next to you. You sighed, “Well then, we’ll just have to keep meeting up here.”

“Darling…”

“I love you. My love for you is not going to change. And I’m certainly not letting some spoiled nymph ruin the love and the relationship that we have.”

Joshua’s eyes widened. He protested violently, “As much as I would love that, I can’t! We can’t! It’s dangerous. Y/n, I don’t have the power to protect you. I never have, and I never will. I’m weak…”

“You’ve told me this a thousand times before. You think I care? If I did, I wouldn’t be sitting here. So what if you’re weak? Powerful or not. I love you in your entirety, flaws and all. You’re imperfectly perfect. Shua. I’m not saying that we enter a romantic relationship, nor am I completely ruling that option out for the future. All I’m saying right now, is that we should continue to meet here.”

Smiling sincerely at Joshua, you noted, “Besides, being able to spend time with you. I think that’s worth the risk. You’re worth the risk.”

Then, more sadly, you added, “However, if you still think that you never want to see me again. If you think that is best, then I will respect your decision.”

Joshua lowered his head. He was terrified of what would happen if Nomia found out. But at the same time, he really loved you. The words that you spoke today, the reassurances that you did want to be with him, your firm conviction that he was worth risking your safety for, and your confession that you did love him too. 

Musing over your words for a while longer to weigh each option, eventually, his heart’s desires won out once again. He could never say no to you. 

Finally, after keeping you in suspense long enough, he whispered, “okay.”

With that, you broke out into a wide grin, launching yourself at Joshua and wrapping your arms around him. Nuzzling into his neck, letting yourself take in his comforting scent, you exclaimed, “Okay!”

Joshua melted into your embrace, leaning further into you. He really missed you. 

Speaking into your ear, he said, “Promise me this though. At any time that you’re not comfortable, tell me, and we’ll stop these meetings at once.”

Although you were about to protest, knowing that you could never be uncomfortable with Joshua, you agreed to put his mind at ease.

At once, Joshua placed a kiss onto your temple, murmuring with love and happiness, “Darling, I love you. So so much.”

Content, you replied, “And I, you.”

Deep down, you knew that there was another storm brewing, though you would try to weather that storm together with Joshua. You would fight for Joshua to the last moment, until you couldn’t anymore. There was no way in hell that you were going to let Joshua go now that you had him back. Together, you would be able to face whatever, and whoever came your way, come what may. 

Or at least, that was what you hoped, and perhaps you were a little too idealistic in your thinking… 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 

Slowly but surely, you and Joshua fell back into your routine of meeting up by the Iremia creek on the weekends. Initially, after your emotional confrontation, things were a little awkward. You weren’t dating, already having decided that you both weren’t ready for that at this moment. On the other hand, now that the information that you both loved each other was thrown out in the open, it was impossible to revert back to your previous dynamic.  

Hence, you and Joshua eventually settled on being in this weird, transitory stage between friends to lovers. You acknowledged that you both weren’t platonic friends. With the kiss, you both crossed that boundary a long time ago. But you weren’t at the stage of being romantically involved lovers yet.

Currently, you and Joshua were just content being with each other. There was no better feeling than being able to spend time with the person you loved. You both treasured each second of it, knowing that there was always a possibility that you both would be ripped away from each other by the circumstances that Joshua was bound by. 

You sulked at the thought. Stupid Nomia and her stupid need for power and prestige. If it weren’t for her, you would have been happily dating the love of your life. Nevertheless, you tried to swallow the feelings of annoyance and anger. 

Instead, you chose to focus on the day that you just had with Joshua as you skipped along in the forest on your way home. You let out an embarrassed squeak thinking about it. It all began after lunch when Joshua presented you with a delicious smelling brown paper bag, mumbling something about how it was a fried doughnut made with honey…

Opening the bag, your eyes brightened and your mouth watered at the sight of the delicious looking doughnut. You squealed, thanking Joshua. You reached for one immediately, biting into it. As soon as you bit into the soft dough, the sweetness of the honey spread through your mouth, causing you to moan in happiness. These sweets were expensive and you only splurged on them during festival season so for Joshua to buy them for you, it was such a welcome surprise. While you did offer to share with Joshua, he said it was all for you. With that knowledge, you reached into the bag to pull out another doughnut. 

Joshua stared at you adoringly as you stuffed your face. Although you looked like a mess with honey smeared all over your face and fingers, Joshua still thought you were the prettiest person in the world. The trek to find the doughnuts and the price of them was worth seeing you enjoy the sweets with sheer joy plastered on your face.

Joshua choked back a laugh. You were chewing on your doughnut with your cheeks all full, making you look like a bunny. He didn’t understand how every single one of your actions could be so adorable.

Swallowing a bite of the doughnut, you asked, amused, “Why are you laughing? Is it because I have honey all over me?”

Nodding his head, Joshua began to chortle with laughter, “You look like a messy bunny.”

You scoffed, “You try eating these doughnuts. Just you wait, I’m sure you will look like a chubby deer.”

Joshua shook his head, leaning towards you, “Bunny, I highly doubt it. I would still look good. You on the other hand…”

His voice trailed off as he extended a hand towards your face, bringing you closer to his face. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Cupping your face, he wiped a smudge of honey that was on your lips before bringing it to his lips. He smirked, “Sweet… just like you… my sweet darling bunny.”

Remembering Joshua’s actions, you harshly rubbed your hot cheeks. This man… this naiad would be your cause of death. He was just too attractive for his own good, and ever since you told him you loved him, he’s been so flirty. One day, you were going to combust or blow a fuse. 

You exhaled, calming your rapidly beating heart. Continuing your journey home, you shivered slightly when a cold breeze rushed past you. Startled, your head snapped up. You looked around, alarmed. Taking note of your surroundings and finding absolutely nothing aside from the rows and rows of trees, you wrapped your arms around yourself, hastening your pace. Getting home wasn’t your top priority. Your priority was to get out of the forest and back to the main trails leading back to Athens. You hoped you would feel better once you reached an area where there were more people walking around. 

You shuddered. You were feeling horribly unsettled. Something about that breeze didn’t feel right. It was hard to explain, but somehow, that breeze didn’t feel natural. It was almost as if something swooped past you, as if someone was watching you. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

On the other side of the forest, there lay an expansive, extravagant looking palace built right into the side of the Nomia mountains. Going further into the palace, within the central atrium on a raised platform Nomia was sitting on a gold plated throne covered in crushed dark green velvet. 

Although she was lounging around lazily, playing with a mountain lion cub on her lap, there was no mistaking the powerful, ominous aura that she exuded. The double doors to the central atrium creaked open, and a small tortoise crawled in. The tortoise was trembling, its eyes trained to the ground as it approached the area before the platform. 

When the tortoise came to a stop, Nomia looked up to see who was the one that disturbed her downtime. Her face was devoid of any emotions. Her eyes narrowed, her gaze cold and calculating as she sized up the tortoise. Affirming the identity of the tortoise, a sinister grin spread across her face. 

With a wave of her hand, the tortoise was shrouded in a dark green mist. Opening its mouth, the tortoise spoke, “My lady, I have collected the information that you ordered me to find… should this information prove to be what you wanted, I trust you will hold up your end of our arrangement to return me to my original form?”

“Chelone, I don’t have all day. Tell me what you know before I lose my patience,” Nomia ordered.

“Like you suspected, your betrothed, Joshua, has been in the company of a mortal. According to the ravens I sent out, the mortal would visit Joshua every weekend. From their intimate behaviour, it seems that they have known each other for a while, and that they are in love.”

Her suspicions confirmed, through gritted teeth, Nomia seethed, “The nerve of that ungrateful naiad. He could have been with me, getting all the prestige, respect, and riches he could ever want. Yet he chose a pathetic mortal?”

In fury, Nomia crushed the glass of wine she had been holding, the wine splattering everywhere. The mountain lion cub on her lap let out a howl, scampering off in fear. 

Raising from her throne, Nomia brushed off the wine from her gown, “Well then. Where does this mortal reside?”

Slightly taken aback, Chelone stuttered, “Uhm… I believe the mortal resides at the edge of the Athenian capital…”

“Very well then,” Nomia said, turning to leave.

“My lady… your promise? You promised to return me to my human form if I collected the information for you,” Chelone interrupted.

Snapping her fingers, Nomia turned so she was facing the tortoise. Nomia chuckled evilly, “about that, I’m afraid I can’t make good on that promise.”

“BUT YOU PROMISED!” Chelone yelled, enraged. 

“What. Did. You. Say.” Nomia asked. The tone of her voice sent an overwhelming feeling of dread over Chelone.

Nomia strutted down from the raised platform over to Chelone. With each click of Nomia’s heels, Chelone’s eyes darted all over the atrium. Retracting her head into her shell, Chelone’s whole body cowered in fear. 

Nomia picked up the shell of the shivering tortoise with one hand. Raising it so Chelone was just below eye level, Nomia mocked, “Dear Chelone. I said I’m afraid I can’t make good on that promise. You were the idiot who refused to appear at Zeus and Hera’s wedding despite being summoned. It’s no wonder that Hermes turned you into this pitiful form. Really, I’m flattered that you came to me, thinking that I could reverse the spell. Unfortunately, even I can’t go against the will of a God. You understand, don’t you dear? You should be thankful that I was able to give you your speech back. That’s as close to your Oread form as you can get. Now, you really should leave before I lose my patience further. I hate to see what would happen if I squeezed your shell a little too hard.”

Dropping Chelone’s body, Nomia smirked as the tortoise scampered off hurriedly, “Now… what to do about that pesky mortal…”

Retreating to the darkness of her personal suite, Nomia shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly, “What’s there to think about? It’s simple. Retribution. That’s all there is to it.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Rubbing a smudge of flour off your brows, you smiled proudly at the variety of freshly baked bread that you just pulled out of the oven. Since you were busy on weekdays, you usually elected to purchase bread from the agora where you worked instead. However, you closed your stall early today so you could bake something for Joshua. 

You clicked your tongue disapprovingly, thinking back to how Joshua recently sheepishly admitted that he didn’t really eat properly whenever he was alone. You had fussed and fretted over his confession. Despite his reassurances that he was fine, you promised to bake something for him. He deserved to be pampered a little, and at least with this spread, he would be well fed for the next week or so. You bounced on your heels excitedly. You couldn't wait to share the bread with Joshua when you saw him next. 

Fishing around your kitchen for some cloth to wrap the bread in, you were interrupted when you heard a harsh knock on your front door. Pausing to glance at the sundial that sat on your kitchen window, you saw that it was almost time for supper. You mentally smacked your forehead. You forgot that you had plans with Minghao for supper today. You were supposed to be at his house half an hour ago. 

Thinking it was Minghao at the door, you called out, “Hao? Just a minute. Let me get something and I’ll be right there.”

The harsh knocking continued. Irritated, you shouted, “Minghao! I said I’ll be right there.”

Your words proved to have no effect, and the knocks only intensified. You grumbled, setting down the pieces of cloth. You strolled over to the door, intent on scolding Minghao for being impatient when you saw him. 

When your hand gripped the door handle, you suddenly felt yourself being hurtled to the side roughly along with your door. You howled in pain as your back hit the wall. That was going to leave a mark. Your eyes snapped up in fury. What was Minghao thinking? He should know better.

You opened your mouth, about to yell at Minghao, but faltered when you saw who was standing in your doorway. Instead of Minghao, you saw a tall beautiful woman. There was no mistaking that she wasn’t human with the way that she carried herself. She had a fiery, menacing aura around her. 

Seeing you pathetically splayed out on the floor and in pain, she smirked, “Oh good, it looks like you’re already bowing down to me.”

You didn’t know who this woman was, but she was definitely dangerous. You needed to call Minghao. You gritted your teeth. The pain from your back was killing you. Slowly pulling yourself up, you steadied yourself using the wall. You seethed, “You know, I just had that door fixed. And go to hell. There’s no way I’m bowing down to anyone.”

The woman laughed haughtily, “You’ll be singing a different tune very soon my dear.”

You rolled your eyes, even her voice was grating. With your back against the wall, you inched closer to the coat rack in your foyer. There was an enchanted raven feather in the coat pocket. Minghao left it with you when you insisted on returning to the Iremia creek the last time, explaining that the feather had two functions. The first was so he could track you down if necessary. The second and the more important function, was that if you found yourself in any danger, you could brush your fingers against the feather and it would alert him that you needed immediate assistance. 

You regretted not listening to Minghao when he told you to keep it on your person at all times, though that didn’t matter right now. You just needed to focus on getting to it without alerting the woman. What you needed to do was to keep her busy.

“If you say so,” you mocked.

“Why you pathetic little….” the woman started, shaking her fist at you.

Cutting her off before she could finish her statement, you said, “Don’t you think I should know who you are? You did break into my house and throw me into a wall.” 

“You don’t know who I am?” The woman asks, incredulous that there is someone who wasn’t aware of her identity.

You raise a brow at her, “no? Am I supposed to?”

“ENOUGH!” The woman roars. She’s in front of you in a flash. She grips your collar, flinging you away from the wall. 

You land in the middle of your foyer, sputtering and coughing, trying to get as much air into your lungs as possible. 

Straightening her posture, the woman turns. Her condescending eyes laced with hatred trained on you. She stalks over to you, like a lioness hunting its prey. 

“You pathetic, ignorant mortal. I shall just have to educate you. My name is Nomia.”

She observes as your eyes flash with recognition, “So you have heard of me.”

You recoil slightly. This was Nomia? Joshua and Minghao were right. She was terrifying.

Concealing your fear as best as you could, you fiddled with the feather that you had managed to grab before Nomia flung you. You could only hope that Minghao would receive the alert. For now, you would have to stall her. You stared right into her eyes, saying sarcastically, “Of course I have. I’ve heard you’re a notorious annoying, wicked, selfish, conceited, power hungry bitch who has no regard for anyone else but herself.”

Nomia chuckled darkly, “You forgot to mention. I’m also beautiful and powerful.”

“You just proved my point.”

“You also forgot one other important thing. I’m Joshua’s betrothed. And as his betrothed, I order you to leave him alone for the rest of your life. I also order you to apologise to me, for trying to steal what belongs to me. He’s mine, and I don’t want him to be burdened with the likes of you.”

At her mention of Joshua, the memories of all the pain she caused him flashed through your mind. All the suffering Joshua went through because of her, and the suffering he would go through in the future because of her. He didn’t deserve to go through any of that. Your blood was boiling by now, and you snapped. 

You weren’t sure where the courage came from, but you were on your feet in an instant. You raised your hand, swiftly delivering a slap to Nomia’s face, your palm making contact with her cheek with a satisfying crack.  

“YOU DON’T EVEN DESERVE TO SAY HIS NAME. Joshua doesn’t deserve any of this. He doesn’t deserve to have to be bound to someone who doesn’t even love him. He doesn’t deserve to be with someone who only wants to use him for your own gain. You see him as someone who you can control and manipulate. You want to strut him around, showing off that you own the only male naiad in existence. He just wants to be free and happy. He deserves to be free and happy, with someone who loves him. And that’s certainly not you.” You growled.

Nomia’s eyes darkened further, “His desires and wants are of no consequence to me.”

Livid, you raised your hand to slap Nomia again. Just as your hand was about to make contact, she caught your wrist. She squeezed your wrist tightly, making you cry out in pain, “You know, for a pathetic mortal, you’re even dumber than I thought. Don’t you know that nymphs are vengeful creatures? You stepped between me and Joshua. You turned him against me, you tainted him with your mortal desires. You raise your voice to me, and then you dare to lay a hand on me? You will bow before me.”

Tears pricked the side of your eyes. You were aching and bruised everywhere. Your wrist was on fire. If Nomia squeezed any harder, she would break your wrist. You wanted to scream, to cry and yell. But, you refused to show any form of weakness to Nomia. You would not submit to her. You said, “I did nothing of that sort. It was your pursuit for power that turned him against you.”

Nomia twisted your wrist, looking pleased when she heard your scream. She leered, “Very well then. Since you still can’t get it into your brain that you should be wallowing at my feet for forgiveness right now. Just know that it was your own stubbornness that led us to this point. I shall have to punish you and Joshua for your actions against me.”

Your blood ran cold at the threat she issued next, “Perhaps I should strip him of his powers, or shall I mutilate him? He doesn’t need all his limbs to carry out his duties, nor his manhood for that matter since I am not marrying him for love or physical pleasure…”

“Stop! Don’t hurt him!” You cried desperately.

Nomia sneered at your reaction, “I wasn’t finished. I could do all those things… Or… you could take the punishment. You would let me punish you in whatever way pleases me most won’t you? After, you’ll never return to the creek, and you won’t interact with Joshua ever again. Agree to those terms and I promise I won’t hurt Joshua.”

Without hesitation, you made your choice. Resolutely, you said, “I agree.”

Within you, your heart was breaking. You failed to keep Nomia at bay. You failed Joshua. You had allowed your delusions that you and Joshua would be safe, happy, and in love for years to come overtake your senses. And you had convinced Joshua of that too. But ultimately, your delusions of grandeur were just that, delusions. You should have been more realistic. You whimpered, knowing that you were going to be forcefully ripped apart from each other. 

Your mind was reeling. While you were terrified of what suffering would befall upon you, you couldn’t let her hurt Joshua. He was too precious to you. You adored all of him from his mannerisms, his cheeky personality, and especially the love-struck behaviour that he only showed to you. He was finally happy… 

Nomia was right. You were just a mortal, a human. You couldn’t stand up to a powerful nymph. You were completely helpless in this situation. You couldn’t even guarantee that Nomia would keep her promise not to harm Joshua. You also knew that Joshua would continue to suffer at her hands in the future but you had to protect him as best as you could right now. You would do anything for him. Stilling your heart, you resigned yourself to your fate, muttering an apology to Joshua hoping that he would find it in his heart to forgive you one day for the choice you made. Even if you had to give up everything, you would protect him. 

Pleased with you choice, Nomia gaffawed, a wicked smile spread across her face, “so be it.”

She dropped your wrist, causing you to fall to the ground in a heap, cradling your broken wrist to your chest. Nomia waved her hand lightly around you. 

She nodded in satisfaction, turning to leave, only to find that her exit had been blocked by Minghao. 

His eyes travelled to you all hunched over and whimpering in pain on the ground. 

Flying into a fury, Minghao rushed to your side protectively. He boomed, “What did you do?”

Completely unphased, Nomia said, “Nothing much. I just put that mortal in their place. It’s as simple as that.”

“Leave. Leave before I call Seungcheol.” Minghao ordered, moving to usher Nomia out the door. 

Making her way out of your house, Nomia laughed deviously, “Despite being the God of time, even Seungcheol would not be able to reverse what I’ve done. Just try and reverse it, the spell will only hurt the mortal more. Enjoy the consequences of your poor choices. Ta ta!”

As she said that, you began to be shrouded in a dark green mist. The mist stung your eyes and burned your lungs, causing the tears you had been holding in now to run freely down your face. The mist continued to swirl and travel around you. The room began to spin. Your eyelids felt heavy. You fell onto the ground, unable to move. The last thing you saw before the mist completely consumed you was Minghao crying your name and running to you with an alarmed expression painted across his face. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Something was wrong, Joshua thought. You were supposed to meet him 2 hours ago. You were never late. And with the exception of those few weeks when you were mad at him, you never missed a meeting with him by the creek. 

Pacing around nervously, Joshua continued to take frequent glances towards the forest that he always saw you disappear into when you left for home. For some reason, the forest looked even denser and darker than the last time he saw it. 

Joshua debated as to whether he should try to go into the forest to look for you. The forest was full of dangerous wild animals that would gladly devour a human if given the chance to. Or, he could be wrong. You could just be late. There was a first time for everything. Scoffing that he even entertained that thought, he made up his mind. He was going to go look for you. 

After stepping into the forest, Joshua’s quest to look for you was interrupted by the rustling of the foliage next to the creek. He turned, scurrying out to see who it was. He skidded to a halt, the blood draining from his face instantly as he laid eyes on Nomia. It would appear that you and Joshua were out of time. 

“What are you doing here?” Joshua demanded, glaring at Nomia. 

“I could ask you the same thing,” Nomia countered. 

Strolling leisurely over to Joshua, Nomia looked around, nodding approvingly of how beautiful the place was. 

Joshua burned with anger seeing Nomia stroll all over the place like she owned it. This was supposed to be your oasis, your refuge. How dare she sanctity of the place.

“You have no right to be here,” Joshua hisses.

Nomia strolls over to him, saying casually, “As your betrothed I do. The person who had no right to be here was that pathetic mortal. Y/n, was it?”

Joshua’s heart leapt into his throat. She knew about you?

Enjoying the sight of Joshua’s terror, Nomia grinned, “Oh? So I was right. Don’t worry now my pet. I’ve taken care of business. We’ll be left alone now. No one will come between us.”

“WHAT DID YOU DO?” Joshua roared.

Placing her hand on Joshua’s face, Nomia smirks, “Don’t worry about it pet. Mere mortals shouldn’t come between superior beings like us. I’ve taken care of it. Now, just be a good little pet and obey me, hmm?”

Joshua slapped Nomia’s hand away, “don’t touch me. I’ll only ask you once more. What. Did. You. Do.”

Nomia’s eyes darkened, she smiled sinisterly, “They laid eyes on what’s mine. In return, I simply made sure your beloved would never see you again. They were oh so obedient as well, agreeing to my terms as long as I agreed not to hurt you.”

Joshua stilled at her revelation. What did you agree to? He wasn’t worth whatever sacrifice you made… 

Letting out a gut-wrenching scream, Joshua lunged at Nomia, sending a powerful wave of water towards her. Deflecting the water with a small flick of her wrists, Nomia grabbed Joshua by his neck. Applying just enough pressure so he would feel her strength, but not enough to cut off his airways, Nomia sneered, “You’re certainly more powerful than before. But still not strong enough. I guess you already know that by now since you weren’t able to save your mortal. You should have heeded my advice not to engage with others. Really, it’s your own fault that your mortal is in such a state. Allow me to enlighten you on what transpired. Your mortal was on the floor, writhing in pain when I was through with them.”

Joshua scowls at her, trying to pull himself away from her, only to feel her grip tighten slightly. Nomia clicked her tongue, “I really wish you would all stop struggling. It’s beginning to bore me. Listen closely pet. Know your place. You’re my pet. I own you. You’re just a play thing to me, something I can use to gain more power and notoriety. Nothing more and nothing less. Still, you are somewhat useful so your safety is secured. Your mortal on the other hand… I wonder how much pain they can withstand?”

Squinting at Joshua, Nomia continues, “It’s your turn to make a choice. Stay by my side obediently, and I will leave your mortal alone. Refuse me and your mortal shall suffer a pain worse than death.”

Joshua glared at Nomia, clawing at her hands until she let him go. Gasping for breath, Joshua growls, “I will never love you.”

Nomia looked at Joshua with disdain, “I’m not demanding your love. That’s worthless to me. I’m demanding your submission and obedience.”

Joshua clenched his fist. He was exhausted from being pushed around by Nomia. Sadly, his hands were tied, he had no choice. Nomia played you both. She used you both as blackmail for the other. But why was it that only you seemed to be suffering? He cursed himself. He really was cursed. Instead of bringing you the love and life you deserved, all he brought you was pain. 

Shaking in anger, Joshua countered, “How would I know that you won’t harm them? I can’t take your word for it. I would need hard proof.”

“You’re in no position to demand anything. But if it will appease you so you do not keep struggling against me, I’ll allow you to visit your mortal every full moon just to see for yourself that they remain unharmed until the day they pass. Mortals live such short lives… Of course, that is on the condition that you’re a good, obedient pet. You will take a guard with you, and you’ll agree not to interact with your mortal.”

Her conditions were more generous than Joshua expected. While he would never be able to interact with you or feel the comfort and love of your embraces ever again, at least he would be able to see you. As long as he had the knowledge that you were safe, he would grit his teeth and live through whatever Nomia demanded of him. 

Musing over Nomia’s terms, Joshua relented, “Fine. However, should there be a moment where you break your promise, our agreement is off.”

Nomia nodded, “Fine.”

Thinking back to the state she left you in, Nomia grinned, “Actually, as a gesture of good faith, I shall allow you to interact with your mortal one last time. You may visit them right now. No guard, no strings attached. You just have to report to my palace tomorrow morning. I have an important meeting with the other Oreads and I require an escort.”  

Joshua perked up at that. Her offer seemed too good to be true, but he wasn’t going to turn down the last chance he would ever have to talk to you, to listen to your melodic voice. He just wanted to hold you in his arms one last time. He also wanted nothing more than to break down and apologise to you for his inability to protect you. He hurriedly took the slip of paper containing your address from Nomia and took off in the direction of your house.

Watching Joshua run off, Nomia licked her lips sadistically, muttering to herself, “Of course, you will come to realise that both of my offers are a double edged sword once you lay eyes on your beloved mortal. Let this serve as both a threat and a reminder of what might happen should you break our agreement.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Coming to a stop in front of your door, Joshua raised a hand to knock, only to find himself unable to. It was as if an invisible force was stopping him. Joshua brought his fist down, leaning his head against your door. He could hear voices inside. You were obviously home, and you had company over.

Then it dawned on him. He was terrified and ashamed at the prospect of facing you. He had run all the way here because he wanted to see you, but never stopped to think about whether you wanted to see him. He had put you through so much, and he didn’t even know what Nomia did to you. He failed to protect you. He failed you. Perhaps this was not a good idea after all. Joshua began to pace around your front door, fretting over what your reaction would be to seeing him. 

Meanwhile, inside your house, Minghao was taking frequent, sneaky glances at the door. He felt the presence of a naiad outside, concluding that it was probably Joshua. Honestly, Minghao wanted to storm out and give Joshua a piece of his mind. But he didn’t want to alarm you. You were still recuperating from your encounter with Nomia the other day. He had brought Seungcheol to see if the spell could be undone. Alas, it was as Nomia said, if Seungcheol tried to reverse time on you, the spell would only come back and harm you more. 

Minghao was furious at this turn of events. He hated that you had to experience this much pain. He was furious with Joshua for being the reason why you were suffering, Nomia for being the cause of your suffering, Seungcheol for not being able to help. Most of all, he was furious with himself. He was the one who encouraged you to take the opportunity to go to the creek in the first place. If he never did that, if he never continued to encourage you to make amends with Joshua, none of this would have happened. Filled with regret, Minghao swore that he would protect you, and that he would nurse you back to health.

Minghao breathed in deeply, there was no point in losing his temper now. He should be focusing on you. Turning his attention back to the tea he was brewing, Minghao concentrated on stirring the tea leaves in the teapot. 

“Joshua’s here isn’t he?” 

Your voice startled Minghao, causing him to drop the spoon he was holding. It fell against the tea pot, the sound resonating through your house. There was a pregnant pause before Minghao sighed, “Yes. He’s outside.” There was no point in lying to you or sheltering you from that knowledge now. 

“Hao please…” You pleaded, hesitant to continue with your request. Even if it was only for a moment, you needed to speak to Joshua. 

Minghao walked over to you, squeezing your shoulder reassuringly, “Yea. I’ll get him. I’ll be outside keeping watch. Take as long as you need.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, nodding appreciatively at Minghao. 

Minghao threw the door open, catching Joshua off guard. Joshua stared at Minghao in shock. Minghao walked out, leaving the door open behind him. 

Minghao spoke softly, “I take it you’re Joshua. Y/n has spoken about you a lot. Look. I don’t know how much you know, probably almost everything, judging from your reaction. Whatever it is, just know that they have been through a lot because of you.”

Glancing in the direction of the living room to indicate where you were, Minghao ushered Joshua inside before shutting the door and standing in front of it protectively. 

Gulping, Joshua took a few steps into your house, pausing in front of the entry to your living room. He saw you sitting on your couch, leaning against the headboards with your eyes closed. Your breathing was steady, as if you were sleeping. He took in your appearance, the dark circles under your eyes, the bandage around your wrist, and the bruises that littered your body. He felt himself shaking again. Nomia really hurt you. 

He gingerly approached you. He called softly, “Darling? It’s me…” only to gasp and recoil in horror at what he saw when you opened your eyes. 

Joshua had tried to brace himself for what he might see. He thought your tender, love filled gaze would be replaced by one that was burning in hatred for him. But nothing, nothing, could prepare him for this.

Your bright eyes, the ones that he loved gazing into for hours, the ones that captured his attention all those months ago, the ones that twinkled under the sunlight, sparkled under the reflection of the water from the creek’s surface, the ones that always looked at him like he created the entire universe. Your eyes he loved so much, they were gone, replaced by dull, lifeless, cloudy irises. He recognised the thin dark green shimmer around your irises. There was no doubt that you were under a permanent curse by Nomia. 

Reality started to sink in, and Joshua cradled his head in his hands helplessly, his heart shattering.

You had been blinded. You were now blind. And it was because you were trying to protect him. 

Joshua dove to your side, crumbling onto the ground in a heap in front of you. He wailed into your lap, repeating the words, “I’M SORRY” over and over. His body shook as sobs racked his body. Tears fell down his cheeks uncontrollably, soaking your clothes. Completely distraught and on the verge of hyperventilating, Joshua grasped at your clothes desperately, as if fearful that you were about to disappear and slip through his fingers. 

Feeling around, you rested your hand on top of Joshua’s head, running your fingers through his hair to soothe him. His hair was getting long. If he wanted to keep his undercut, he would need to get a haircut soon. It was odd. Despite the room being filled with the sounds of Joshua’s sobs and your clothes being soaked with his tears, you felt oddly empty. Perhaps it was because you had no more tears left to cry, having spent the last few days in Minghao’s embrace as you cried from the traumatic  experience.

Finally, Joshua’s sobs died down, though his body was still trembling. Tracing the outline of Joshua’s face until you could cup his face in your hands, you tilted his head upwards so he was now looking at you from his position on the floor. Softly, you began, “Shua…”

Cutting you off, Joshua blubbered, “Darling... I’m sorry. I failed to protect you… I failed you…”

Gently, you wiped the stray tears that rolled down his face, “Shua… it’s okay. As long as you’re safe, I… I’m at peace with my decision.”

“It’s not fair! Why did you do it? WHY? I could have… I would take any punishment if it meant you were safe,” Joshua whimpered.

“That’s exactly why I did it. I love you. I couldn’t let you get hurt. You have so much more of your life to live. You shouldn’t have to be burdened with this curse. It’s okay love.”

“NO! It’s not. It should have been me,” Joshua cried.

You sighed, there was no way you could console him now. Joshua was too consumed by grief and regret. Shifting yourself so you were on the floor next to him, you wrapped your arms around him. However, your actions only made him begin to sob again. 

Your heart cried out, aching at the sounds of his sobs. With tears beginning to prick your eyes, you tried hushing him gently, “Shhh… It’s okay… Shua…”

“I couldn’t save you,” Joshua whispers brokenly.

You swallowed a sob, your voice breaking at how broken and exhausted he sounded, “But you already did. You’re my Joshua. My Shua. You’ve lived up to your name. You’ve provided me with so much salvation and solace during whatever time we spent together. I was really, really happy when I was with you and I’ll treasure those memories forever.”

“It’s not fair. The world is too cruel…” Joshua managed to choke out.

You fought back your tears. You had to remain strong for him, to ease his guilt and pain. You replied, “The world is indeed cruel, but I’m so glad that even in this cruel world, I managed to meet you. I love you. I always have and I always will.”

Joshua shook in your arms, “I love you too. Only you. You have my heart and soul, now and forevermore.”

Sniffling, Joshua pulled away from you, affirming resolutely, “I’ll still visit you. I promise.”

“And I’ll know when you do.”

“How?” Joshua asks, wiping his tears to stare at you wide eyed.

You chew the insides of your cheek for a moment. You point at your nose, “You smell like petrichor, the smell of the earth after it rains. It’s always stronger whenever you’re near.”

Smiling reassuringly at Joshua, the corners of your eyes still crinkling as you teased, “I might have lost my sight, but my other senses are stronger than ever now.”

Through his tears, Joshua smiles back at you adoringly, “I think it’s a little too soon for that joke darling…”

With that, Joshua’s lips quivered once more, “I love you.” 

Whispering in response, you replied, “I love you too.”

Guiding your hands up to his shoulders, you brought him into your embrace again. This time, you both squeezed each other tightly, afraid of letting go. Feeling the sobs wreck through Joshua’s body, your resolve broke. You allowed your tears to fall down your cheeks freely. You both knew this would be the last time you would ever be able to embrace each other like this. So, you both held each other as you wept on the floor of your living room, mourning for the loss of your sight and for the loss of each other. 

At some point, you and Joshua fell asleep in each other’s embrace, completely exhausted and out of tears. When you woke again early the next morning, you shivered, not feeling Joshua’s warmth next to you. The only thing your senses could identify was the strong, lingering scent of petrichor and a familiar leather bound book on the floor right next to your bandaged hand. You touched the engraving on the cover, recognising it as the book of quotes you had lent Joshua all those weeks ago. As you continued to run your fingers over the cover, you felt something pillowy and soft. You recognised the flower immediately. How could you not? This flower grew by the Iremia creek, and you spent plenty of time making flower crowns out of this with Joshua.

You gripped the flower gently, clutching it to your heart. You hunched over, covering your mouth to muffle your wails. Joshua had left you with a forget me not flower. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

And so, your relationship with Joshua came to a close. But for years to come after, until the end of your days, Joshua took advantage of his agreement with Nomia and made good on his promise. Every full moon, he would visit you, watching you lovingly from a distance. It soothed his heart a little to know that you had eventually recovered and that you were safe, though nothing could ever fix the jagged hole in his heart and soul made by the choice he was forced to make, the one which forced him to walk away from the person he loved more than anything in the world. 

On your end, you tried to return to live your life as normally as you could. However, you knew whenever Joshua visited you. The strong scent of petrichor that wafted and lingered through the air was indicative of that. Inhaling the scent was comforting. You were comforted with the knowledge that Joshua was still watching over you, and that he still loved you. Yet, the scent of petrichor also made your heart ache. It served as a painful reminder of your time with Joshua, and how your love was real, but how life’s circumstances tore you both apart, forbidding you from being together. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

ᨒ Petrichor (noun): the scent of the earth after rain. Some would describe the scent as distinctively earthy, pleasant, and sweet. But to you and Joshua, the scent would remain as a constant reminder of where your hearts were, where your home and family was, where you could take refuge, who you could take refuge with, the love that you had shared, and the love that could not be. 

taglist: @weird-bookworm @wonijinjin @babyleostuff @wishing-fieshes @kwanienies @mayashu @megseungmin @porridgesblog @haecien @mirxzii @scoupsofcherries @eightlightstar @brownsugarbaybee @zaggprincess2 @nonononranghaee

petrichor taglist: @amoryeonjun @hipsdofangirl @valenhui @yoonzinoooo @fantasies-of-a-bookworm @shuasdraftsalt

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Come Thru

" you make me wanna come thru quarter after two just to put it down on you"

✧ pairing: joshua hong x female!reader ✧ wordcount: 1.7k ✧ genre: toxic fwb situation, slight angst, smut (mdni 18+)

✧ reblogs, likes and comments are always appreciated ♡! tumblr is based on reblogs not likes, and they help writers like me to get better reach. thank you!

✧ summary: your fwb joshua, comes over despite your half-assed protests. you arrangment is over, but one last time won't hurt, right? ✧ tags: non-idol!au, fwb! joshua, toxic!joshua, afab!reader, few smau texts, joshua is an asshole and reader lets him. ✧ warning/smut tags: DUBCON, coercion, unprotected p in v sex, degradation, slapping, groping, fingering, creampie. ✧ note: i recommend you don't take the dubcon and coercion warning lightly, if this isn't your cup of tea do not read. minors plz do not even try, i am watching. joshua is written to be an asshole in this fic. i also want to preface that i don't view joshua in this way irl, this is purely fiction. don't be like reader irl, this is made up plz. thank u to @junkissed and @okiedokrie for beta-reading ♡. also i had to ai generate an expanded version of this pic for the header, fyi. -> i have been in a joshua brain rot for the past 3 months, so this is the cause for this fic :p. lmk if u like darker themed fics! see u soonest - anna !

A part of you is reluctant to open the door, whilst the other part is begging you to give him one more chance. One more chance to kiss him, to feel him against your skin, to hear him say your name. 

There hasn’t been a time where you’ve denied Joshua’s need, allowing him to use your body in the ways he sees fit. But it’s different now, and that difference is the fact that you and Joshua don’t see eye to eye on the current status of your “relationship”. 

But you let him in anyway, you allow him to feel you completely, even when you know it's wrong. You know it’s wrong to do these things when you’re desperately in love with him and you know he doesn’t reciprocate those feelings. The only communication between you two is texts asking the other to come over. To fulfill each other's desires through a quick and hard fuck. 

“Fuck, it's cold,” Joshua mutters, rubbing his arms to create some type of warmth as you open the door, “what took you so long?” 

“Then go home,” you roll your eyes, moving over to let him pass through the door despite the fact you told him to go home. 

“I don't wanna, I've missed you,” Joshua smiles at you, not with affection but just because he’s pleased at the fact that you allowed him to come over. 

“Why are you here, Shua?” you ask him, your arms crossing in front of your chest as you feign annoyance. 

“You know why,” he says, eyes piercing yours as his expression turns serious. 

“We can’t keep doing this,” you sigh, but your feet move towards you bedroom anyways while Joshua follows suit. 

Despite your verbal protest, you can’t help but fall into his trap. Blaming it on how handsome he is, how soft his voice gets when hes with you, and especially because he knows how to fuck you right. 

In your past relationships, sex never felt good, it was mostly just you going through the motions. Your partners finishing and leaving you to lie there sticky and displeased. But with Joshua, he doesn’t even begin till he’s made you cum. The gratification he gives you doesn’t start with his cock inside you. It begins with his mouth on your cunt, his fingers inside your wet hole. The chivalry he displays while he fucks you in your bed is unfortunately the only way you are able to witness it. 

Outside of your late nights with him, he doesn’t contact you, or even try to have a conversation with you. And yet you still fell for him. 

You feel his arms snake around your waist as the two of you head to your bedroom. There’s a feeling in your stomach that you can’t pinpoint. A feeling of guilt mixed with a bit of excitement. 

His lips move down your neck and you can’t help but lean back against his chest as he shuts the door. Strong arms pulling your waist in tighter as he leaves small bruises along your skin. 

Your body feels hot. All rational thoughts have left your head the moment he touched you. His hands start to move, groping at your chest, the flimsy material of your sleep wear allowing him to feel you despite the barrier. Your nipples hardening against his fingertips and he moves your head to the side, pulling you into a deep kiss. 

His dominant hand moves down from your chest, across your stomach and into your sleep shorts. 

“Why aren't you wearing underneath?” he mumbles against your lips. 

“It's too hot,” you respond before kissing him again. 

Finding your clit, he rubs circles against your sensitive bud. Rubbing and playing with you until your legs start to shake. The makeout ceases as your too overwhelmed by pleasure, your mouth open yet still against his lips as you moan out his name. 

“Fuck, you’re such a slut for me aren’t you, baby,” He curses, placing a finger inside your dripping cunt. 

He continues to play with you, his finger moving in and out of your tight pussy. Your walls are pulsing as he begins to add a second and then a third. The coil in your stomach starts to tighten as Joshua speeds up his ministrations. 

“I'm close,” you whimper, your eyebrows furrowing as you concentrate on reaching your orgasm. 

“Still so fucking tight,” Joshua whisper in your ear, feeling the way you clench around his fingers, "no matter how many times I put my cock into you."

It all comes to an abrupt stop and you whine at the loss of his touch. His pupils are dilated, eyelids lowered with lust. He doesn’t allow you to whine for him any further, carrying your body towards the bed before dropping you. Your body hits the mattress and it bounces underneath your weight. 

“Fuck me, please,” you beg him, your eyes watching the way he removes his clothes. 

You follow his actions, removing your soiled sleep shorts and thin tank top. Your tits bouncing as you throw your shirt onto the floor, not caring where it lands. The only thing on your mind is Joshua’s cock and the feeling of him being inside you. 

His eyes wash over your frame, his adam’s apple bobbing as he takes your figure in. He thinks your so sexy, with the way you stare at him so needily, your legs already spread for him. He doesn’t care that he’s promised that this would be the last time, he doesn’t care that you want to better your self. To stop this arraignment. He’s addicted to the feeling of your tight pussy, how it milks his cum and leaves him wanting another round. 

Hovering over top of you he aligns his dick with your entrance, rubbing the fat tip of his cock against your wet slit. The sounds coming from his actions are unholy, but to him the feeling is like heaven on earth. 

“You're soaking,” he groans, applying pressure to your clit with the tip of his length. 

Your eyes roll back, your walls pulsating around nothing, all you want is for him to be inside you. But you stop him for a moment, wondering why he hasn’t put on a condom. 

“Do you have a condom?” you place your hand against his chest, pushing him back slightly. 

“No, it's fine, we’ve done it without one before,” he shrugs. 

You sit up a little and roll your eyes at him. Sure you’ve done it without a condom before, but now that this arrangment has lost it’s exclusivity, you don’t trust Joshua’s words. You know that he’s probably seeing other people. 

“Joshua, fuck, are you trying to get me pregnant?” you sigh, and he does the same. 

“But it feels better without it,” he whispers in your ear before pushing you down onto the bed again. 

Before you can even register whats happening, you feel him fully sheath himself inside you. A moan escapes your lips in surprise and also pleasure. You don’t want him to fuck you like this, but the pleasure is too hard to ignore. The feeling of his naked cock inside you causes you to squeeze around him tighter. 

“I told you, it feels better without one,” he mutters, pushing your legs into your chest, folding you in half. His upper body against you, your legs essentially locked in place. 

“Joshua please,” your eyelids droop with pleasure. Your hands moving to grip his biceps as you allow him to fuck you raw. 

Joshua groans from above you, his hips snapping against your cunt, balls slapping against the skin of your ass. You can see the clear outline of his cock poking out from your lower stomach. 

“Your pussy's so good, fuck,” he continues to groan out of pleasure, his tip kissing your cervix with each thrust, "taking my cock so well, baby."

He moves slightly to let go of one of your legs as he sits up, flipping your body and arranges you till your ass is in the air, your back arched. As he re-enters you, a salacious moan leaves your lips, savouring the feeling of his balls hitting your clit. 

“No one is going to fuck you like I do, you hear me?” He says, his thrusts becoming more powerful to emphasize his words. 

“I said, do you hear me?” he reiterates himself, and you answer him obediently. 

"Mhm, fuck, feels so good," you whine.

Joshua’s hands come down to slap your ass harshly, leaving large red hand prints against your supple skin. The burn feels goods and your whimper with every slap he gives you. 

“Joshua please, don’t cum inside me,” you beg him, but he just chuckles at your pleas. 

You can feel your self getting closer to your orgasm, your walls tighenting against his cock with every move he makes. 

“Be a good girl for me and just take what I give you,” is all Joshua says, his hands moving over to your clit, rubbing it in circles to get you closer to completion. 

His other hands is pushing your face into the pillow with so much force that you genuinely don’t believe that you are able to move from where you lay. You can feel his member twitch inside you, his thrust beginning to get sloppy. The headboard is banging against the wall as he moves in and out of you.

Then you feel it, his hips still, his length fully inside you, tip right against your cervix before he releases his load. 

“Shua!”

You moan at the way his hot white cum fill your needy cunt, your eyes rolling back as your releases follows right after his. All you can hear is his laboured breathing as he removes himself from you.

Letting go of his hold on you, your body flops agains the mattress. You can hear shuffling behind you and you turn around to see Joshua already putting on his clothes. 

“I’ll text you the next time I want to come over,” Joshua says when he’s fully dressed, pulling you into a deep kiss before leaving. 

You sigh into your pillow, the relization of what just happened hitting you right away. The feeling of his cum dripping out of your now swollen cunt makes you feel sick, but you can’t get over how good he makes you feel. It doens’t matter how many times you tell him that “this is the last time”, Joshua always get what he wants.

✧ note: thank you for reading, i hoped you liked it! leave a comment or an ask if u wanna see more of this.

✧ taglist: @christinewithluv @todorokiskitten @peachescreamandcrumble @minwonfairy @oneandonlyluvv @ihrtmingyu @tigerhoshii @sleepzyy @luveveryonewoo @thepoopdokyeomtouched @chan-s-laptop @aksweet7 @leah-rose03 @woofie-nctzen-fanarts @gyuguys @crystal-rhyming @jenoxygen @hoshhhiiiii @babigriin @bouclesdefeu @mingyuecstacy @iluvseokmin @odevote118 @wonvsmile @suga-bitch @chickpea-jimin @lar3ine @bias-recs @hanniebub @iluvmingi @vapidlynn @aaniag @yogurttea @blurr3db3rry @lovejoshua @woozixo @drunk-on-dk @noiceoofed @angelfeverdream @leahhhher @hanniebwii @yuyunhoo @whowantshota @hannniiiiiehae @writingbarnes @chariseiswriting @imhwajaez @tomodachiii @valenhui @3lilredroses @bunnyjjongie @sunniques @lovejoshua (hi user lovejoshua u love joshua so here’s some joshua)

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What the Fuck is Up with Secretary Hong? Pt. 4 - A Silly Little Situation

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An Oh Baby, You miniseries

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heads up! poly fic. reader is cold :)

“hey, uh… i think we’ve lost them.”

jeonghan is a few steps behind joshua when he hears him speak aloud. he furrows his brow, removing his scarf as he continues into the bedroom to realize what joshua means. there’s a few extra blankets on your shared bed, and a lump on one side, burrowed underneath it all. jeonghan can only laugh softly, shoving his scarf and coat into joshua’s arms. there’s literally no way he’s passing up this opportunity. he tugs just enough at the blankets until he can see your annoyed face, pouting up at him as you go to readjust the blankets. “aren’t you warm?”

“i’m freezing my ass off, you meanie.” you huff. “my boyfriends left me during a cold snap.”

“oh, poor baby,” joshua chuckles from where he’s hanging up his clothes alongside jeonghan’s.

you stick your tongue out. jeonghan just giggles softly before shoving some of the blankets back, motioning for you to move over. he’s in a t-shirt and sweatpants: perfectly prepared to catch up on sleep the moment he came home to you from that work conference… unlike joshua in his sweater and jeans.

“joshua had to look nice for his adoring fans,” jeongham teases you. “i’m sure all the airport staff went crazy for him.”

joshua rolls his eyes. “they bought me this sweater. i wanted to wear it for them,” his gaze meets yours, and he gives you the softest smile. “i’ll cuddle in a minute, honey.”

“you better,” you pout, snuggling into jeonghan’s arms. he's already pressing soft kisses against your neck, giggling when he looks over to joshua. you're admiring him in the baby blue sweater you bought him, and he's teasing you a little as he strips and redresses in something cozier for sleep.

"move," he says as he comes over, and you just giggle as you move closer to jeonghan. joshua slides into the newfound space, already snuggling in. he tilts your chin back, lips meeting your own in a long, sweet kiss. "missed you," he breathes out, already leaning in for another.

you let out a happy hum, the three of you snuggling together. missed you, too.

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carry your heart

PAIRING: joshua hong x reader GENRE: fluff WC: 518 WARNINGS: none~

Joshua always helps you carry your purse and every other thing, including your feelings.

"I think I left... oh, right," you grin when Joshua brings forward your purse. You link your arm with his free one, leaning closer to press a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, Josh."

Joshua smiled back at you, securing your purse in his other hand. He loves carrying your purse, one because you often leave them lying around without supervision, and two because he can store his phone and some other belongings in them. It's a win-win solution.

You stopped before going into the venue, smoothing the front of your dress.

"Still nervous?" Joshua stepped in front of you, trying to find your eyes.

You look up at him, seeing his sincere gaze fixed on you, the way it always does all this time. He had convinced you to come and meet his friends since all of them are in town. A small gathering, but somehow, you feel intimidated. These were the people that Joshua knew from such a young age, the people who stayed through all the ups and downs in his life. You envy them, but you're more scared that they will dismiss you easily.

"Darling?" He called you, tilting his head slightly.

"I'm fine," you tell him. Offering a genuine smile. Your fear can sit this one out.

"I promise they don't bite," he joked lightly. He then took your hand back in his arms and walked together inside the venue. You were immediately greeted by the warm atmosphere and playful energy that filled the room. Joshua turned to you, watching as a smile blooms on your face.

Soon enough, you were engaging in conversations with his friends, exchanging jokes and stories about him.

"I like her," someone spoke beside him. He had excused himself to grab a drink five minutes ago. In his hands, two glasses of soda but he stopped himself from going directly to you. Joshua smiled at the comment, his heart swelled at the amount of adoration his friends showed you.

"I like her too," Joshua said mindlessly. "No, I love her actually," he said when you turned your head to where he was standing, offering a smile and a little wave. His friend just grinned and smiled at his antics.

"Did you have fun?" Joshua asks when you both walk back to his car. Your purse is still secured on his arm. Goodbyes were exchanged, and the night was finally setting in with the moon shining brightly.

"You know, I was afraid that they wouldn't like me," you pondered. "But they're the nicest person I've ever met, Josh," you added.

"How could someone don't like you, darling?" Joshua chuckled lightly. He knows for one thing none of his friends would dislike you. Not when you're the only person who could paint the sweetest smile on his face for days on end.

You only laugh in response, feeling way lighter than before. This is how you trust Joshua; with all of your feelings packed in a purse. Trust him to always know how to handle them.

a/n. daily streak of wanting THE joshua hong to be my boyfriend count: 1

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