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half-filipino!iwaizumi and reader make oikawa try balut for the first time (scenario/hc)

creds to @jesus-christ-super-ace for the idea mwah mwah mwah

reader is implied as filipino and gn!reader as always.

this is more of a platonic writing between oikawa and filo iwa and reader, but there’s a hint of ✨relationship✨ for you and iwa.

for dialogue, t=tooru h=hajime y= you

CW: LOTS OF CURSING LMAOO OUR CURSES SOUND SO BAD TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH 💀💀

god i hope my characterization for oikawa is accurate enough 💀💀

this all started when oikawa and iwa chan made a bet.

if iwa lost, he would have to take oikawa out to lunch, but if oikawa lost, he’d have to try balut. (balut: duck embryo that is boiled and eaten from the shell)

oikawa ended up overestimating himself and lost to iwa chan.

iwa tells you about the forfeit oikawa has to do, and YOU IMMEDIATELY WANT IN.

i saw a post that said oikawa was prolly a sore loser and I 100% AGREE esp in this case. oikawa alr knows what balut is, AND HE DOES NOT WANNA EAT IT

he’d act all whiny, come up with reasons how iwa didn’t win, and avoid the forfeit at all costs. i mean i don’t blame him IT’S AN EMBRYO.

so here you two are. LITERALLY dragging oikawa from his house to yours to force him to eat balut.

t: “NOOO I DON’T WANT TO. STOP. KIDNAPPERS. I DON’T KNOW THEM.”

h: *bonks oikawa’s head* “PUTANGINA KA SHITTYKAWA GUSTO MO SAPAKIN KITA?? (you bitch (there’s really no exact translation for putangina mo) shittykawa you want me to smack you??) THIS IS YOUR CONSEQUENCE FOR COMING UP WITH THE BET IN THE FIRST PLACE”

t: “BUT IWA CHAN YOU ALREADY SAPAK-ED ME. Y/N-CHAN HELPPP” (HIS TAGALOG WOULD BE SO SLANGED TOO PLS)

y: “do you hear something hajime?”

h: “nah. i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

t: *proceeds to whine even more*

when you three finally reach your intended destination with the balut waiting on the table, oikawa tries to bolt out your premises, only to get thrown over iwaizumi’s shoulder.

h: "don't make us tie you down gago" (gago: asshole/bitch. just an insult LMAO)

iwa would offer to eat one first himself to show oikawa it really isn't a big deal even though his O.A ass still thought otherwise.

if you also like balut, you'll eat one with haji saying how delicious it is and how oikawa is really missing out.

if you don't like balut, (like me) (DON'T ATTACK ME PLS I HAVEN'T HAD IT IN A WHILE I'LL TRY AGAIN NEXT TIME I HAVE IT TO SEE IF MY OPINION CHANGED) you'll try it with oikawa to make it better.

omg oikawa gags so many times bc he really doesn't wanna do it and you and haji are just like

"gago ka pala :|. kainin mo na. ang tagal ka." (son of a bitch :|. just eat it you’re taking too long)

during the time tooru stalls to eat the damn thing, you and haji are sharing other snacks like boy bawang and skyflakes like the power couple you are.

t: "iwa-chan, y/n-chan :(((( stop flirting it's gross"

y: "by the time you're done that SINGLE balut there won't be any choc nut for you so bilisin mo." (choc nut: filipino candy bar. bilisin mo: hurry up)

both your eyes are literally glued to him so he won't spit it out or run away again.

when he FINALLY decided to eat it he'll close his eyes so hard and sadly chew it.

y: "how is it"

t: "i don’t like itt"

h: "too bad you only ate half of it when you have to eat the whole thing."

he'll eat the rest while downing some mango juice (gina brand ofc)

his review is literally "never again. no. i respect your food but it's not exquisite in my taste bud's opinion."

in addition, you and tooru managed to come up with a plan yourselves. you guys literally have telepathy, and knew what the other was thinking with one mischievous look. iwa was so sus tho.

t: "iwa-chan!! what is this called again"

h: "anak ng- choc nut"

y: "you mean CHOC ON DEEZ NUTS" (I'M SO SORRY I LITERALLY CAME UP WITH IT IN THE MOMENT I HAD TO INCLUDE IT BAHAHAH)

you and oikawa just burst out laughing while iwa is there like 🙂🩴

haji is literally about to grab his tsinelas (slipper) and sampal (slap) you guys right there and then. he will def take away the choc nut and make tooru eat another balut. (joke lang...unless? 😟)

after the balut shenanigans, the three of you will hang out and continue to eat filipino food oikawa is actually familiar with, be chismosas (gossipers or “tea spillers” in modern terms), and do what you all do on normal hangouts. all of you get to third wheel each other LMAOO.

I HOPE THIS IS OKAY I REALLY TRIED LMAO

GUYS ARE YOU PROUD I DIDN’T USE GOOGLE TRANSLATE AT ALL FOR THIS SCENARIO :DD (if something is wrong filo moots pls tell me 😀)

i should start tagging my kuya iwa supporters. lmao. @jesus-christ-super-ace @nanaomiomi <3 yall frfr 🤪

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