Im Not Even A Girl - Tumblr Posts

Hi Sniggi-senpai! I saw you're asking for not so popular characters so I was wondering if I can ask a scenario for Absalom x fem!reader

She is in the mugiwara and Ab-sama falls in love with her when Luffy's crew arrive at thriller bark. What about her to seem shy from the outside but to his surprise she reply to his flirty avance and actually have a dirty mind? This is not much NSFW it's totally ok if you want to add some more spice, I appreciate👀

Thank you❤ hope you're having a good day, take care and don't overwork yourself :3

I kinda didn't like Absalom in the beginning and also when I read the request I thought about not doing it but I'm glad I did! I'm still not a huge fan but I enjoy writing for him. I kinda see him as being a pervert but when he actually gets the 'invitation' to go all out he's a little overwhelmed so I went with this headcanon...hope you like it!

Warning: slightly nsfw, Absalom being a pervert (so Absalom being Absalom)

Pairing: Absalom x female reader

Word count: 1.5k

He wasn’t a man who was too picky when it came to women; a nice ass, nice boobs, fine curves and he was all over them. But the moment he laid eyes on you he couldn’t help but find all other women he’s met so far to be nothing more than at most okay to look at. He needed to talk to you, he needed to have you! Every fiber in his body craved your body from the first second. Was it shallow? Sure. But Absalom didn’t care. He was a simple man with simple desires and what he desired the most right now was you.

The only problem was, you were here with the straw hats and he was sure it wouldn’t be so easy to get to you, let alone when you were all by yourself. He knew that blond guy would try and protect you, the way he was always over you and the other women. But he had an ace up his sleeve – his devil fruit power.

He followed you for a long period of time, always trying to find the perfect moment to snatch you away and maybe he could already take you as his wife….

If he wasn’t invisible, the huge blush from his perverted thoughts could’ve been visible and he actually had to restrain himself not to let his thoughts wander too far since he didn’t want to get a nose bleed.

He almost missed you guys deciding to split up and you, for some reason, went all by yourself. As if the heavens had heard his pleas and were well-disposed towards him. He, in his invisible state, followed you through the dark forest of Thriller Bark, his eyes practically glued to your ass and thighs, appreciating the short pants you were wearing, almost exposing your ass but giving view to the sexy juncture that connected thighs and butt. He was jealous of all you male crew mates; they got to see this view every day!

You felt like you were being followed but every time you turned around, no one was there. But this eerie feeling stayed. You also felt uncomfortably naked all of a sudden, and tried to pull your pants down to cover your butt. You usually were comfortable wearing skimpy clothes but right now…it felt like someone was practically already eye fucking you.

You picked up the pace, trying to get back to your friends and feel safe again when suddenly, you felt a warm, wet thing lick up your neck and an aroused growl. You stopped dead in your tracks, your whole body stiffened and the small hairs on the back of your neck stood up in fear.

“You taste so sweet.” A voice purred and you felt two strong arms wrap around your torso and press your body against someone else’s. And then, this body materialized and over your shoulder you could make out a….lion? Man? What the hell?

“What the-? Let go of me!” you yelled, struggling in his grip. His whole weird appearance had made your fear fade away and you just wanted to get away from this thing.

“Oi, stop struggling!” he complained but you managed to free yourself and get some distance between the two of you. Now, you could take a better look at the man in front of you but you didn’t manage to get rid of your confusion. “What are you?” you asked out lout, making him take a step back and blush slightly. “W-what do you mean, what am I? Stop joking around!”

You pressed your lips together, finding it a little cute how flustered he was at your comment. “Have you been following me this whole time?” you wanted to know, changing the topic. The man seemed to be a little relieved about this and grinned at you, his eyes wandering over your body to finally appreciate your front side as well. Of course, his eyes rested a little bit too long at your breasts and now it was your turn to blush slightly.

“Stop staring so obviously! I asked you a question!” you complained, crossing your arms in front of your chest to hide your boobs from his eyes the best you could.

“Indeed, I have. I’ve been following you the moment you got to this island.” He said with a grin, coming a step closer. “Don’t you have anything else to do?” you asked, stepping a step back, your eyes following his every move. Even though he kind of looked like a lion he wasn’t really moving that gracefully. So maybe it wasn’t a devil fruit power that made him look like this? Oh, right. He could turn his body invisible, so this was probably his power. And judging by the stitches he wasn’t born this way either so the only logical conclusion was that this was thanks to some kind of surgery.

“When I first saw you, I knew we were meant to be together so naturally, I followed you.” He explained, making it sound like he really believed what he said. You raised an eyebrow and couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “So, you only want me because of my body?” you retorted, slowly putting down your arms. “W-well…I bet your personality is great as well…” he stuttered, looking away since he knew he got caught. What a horny bastard….but kinda cute. You thought to yourself.

“And what exactly did you like about my body? I would ask you the same question about my personality, but I think you can’t really tell me anything about it, am I right?” Absalom was stunned. Were you actually trying to flirt with him as well? Not, that he was particularly good at flirting – he usually simply followed the women around without actually being successful. But if he understood it correctly, you were flirting with him. And he would be doomed if he let this opportunity pass!

“Well…of course I first saw your face.” He lied. You raised your eyebrow again, showing him that you didn’t believe a single word he was saying. “My face? What do you like about it?” you insisted. “Y-your eyes are…really beautiful…”

“My eyes? What’s my eye color?” you asked, closing your eyes to not let him see. Absalom stuttered, obviously not knowing your eye color since he hasn’t been paying attention to this part of your body.

“Okay! I was lying! The first thing that caught my eye was your butt!” he admitted, a grin slowly creeping on his face. “And I must say, it’s the most delicious looking ass I’ve seen in my entire life.” He purred, coming a little closer again, now only a few feet between you. “This sounds more honest. What do you like about it?” you kept insisting, feeling flattered that this man was so bluntly stating that he liked your ass.

“It’s just perfect; the shape, the way it sways when you move….I just wanted to touch it! And then your boobs….I want nothing more than to burry my face between them.” Wow, you haven’t actually anticipated this much honesty but you wouldn’t deny that it kind of turned you on. Sure, Sanji always complimented you but for some reason this time it had an effect on you.

“What’s your name?” you wanted to know. With a grin, the man bowed down and introduced himself as Absalom. “Absalom.” You repeated his name and now it was his turn to have a shiver run down his spine. His name on your tongue – it made him imagine the different ways you could say his name. “And what is your name?” he retorted, looking at you after getting up again.

“Y/n.” you answered, smiling at him. “So, Absalom. Now that you’ve told me about what you like about my body….what do you want to do next?” you cooed, looking at him curiously. Absalom came closer, now standing right in front of you. He wanted to seem confident but you saw it in his eyes that he was a little overwhelmed by you reciprocating his flirting.

“Let me help you, okay?” You suggested and your hands were already on your T-Shirt, slowly pulling it up. Absalom’s eyes threatened to pop out of his head. Was this really happening? The more flesh you exposed, the hornier he got and when you finally pulled the fabric over your head, exposing your breasts with no bra his nose started bleeding like crazy. “Hey! You’re bleeding!” you yelled but he didn’t care.

“C-can I touch you?” he asked, his hands already doing a grabbing motion. “No way! Not as long as you’re bleeding!” you reprimanded him, pushing him away. “I’ll get it under control! Don’t go away!” he pleaded, trying to stop the bleeding. Why now? I was this close! He cursed his body, his back turned to you. He still couldn’t believe what was happening but he wouldn’t let a stupid nose bleed stop him.

When he turned around it almost started again – but this time because you were completely naked, looking at him a little innocently. “You were so good at praising what you liked about my body. But maybe you could also show me exactly what parts you like the most, okay?”

God, this was his lucky day.