It Genuinely Took Me Hours To Write The Second Version - Tumblr Posts
It's so funny editing the last few chapters of my first draft because it's so obvious I was rushing to get to the end. Take a look at the difference between my first attempt and my second draft.
First draft
It took several minutes for my morning haziness to wear off the next morning. I was dressed and ready, waiting for Maya. Then I remembered what she had done and that she was not coming. I was almost late to class. Catalina pulled me aside after class to update me. She said there was not much her mother could do since we were attacked outside of school, but she was going to announce later that we are all to stay on campus for the time being.
Second draft below cut
Maya did not show up to my room the next morning. I did not wait for her. Dressing was harder than ever with only one completely functional hand. I struggled with buttons and tying up my hair, and the strain I put on my hand worsened the pain so badly I had to stop multiple times. It took almost the entire morning to ready myself, but I could not rely on my attendant. Not anymore. I pushed Maya to the back of my mind on my way to class, having decided the night before that the best course of action was to discuss this issue with Madame Spiritwalker. As the highest authority figure in our clan, she had the right to know. I trusted her to make a decision that deep down I knew I could not. A month with Maya as my attendant made me emotionally involved, and that was the last thing a Spiritwalker needed. My mother taught me how to be just. I did not want her to see how I fell short of that quality in this situation. By the time I made it to the hallway, classroom doors were already slamming shut. Catalina waited outside one of them, her concern placed elsewhere. She frantically glanced around the hallway, visibly letting out a breath when she saw me. When I came close, she pulled me off to the side with her. “Are you alright? I’ve been waiting for you all morning.” She was thinking about last evening. I knew because I was too. Placing Maya out of my thoughts left room to be filled, and the knowledge that someone tried to kill me demanded that space. I realized that in the chaos of the event, I never did get to tell everyone that I was alright. I reassured Catalina then, making sure she knew my lateness was about my hand, not the attack. The bell rang mid-sentence, but from her softening features I knew she understood. “I wanted to tell you,” she hurried, “that my mother said since the attack happened off campus there is nothing she can do, but she is going to address it.”
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