Jamesoncastello - Tumblr Posts
⚡, 🗑️, 🌻
🌻 a worried text.
Aiden: Are you okay? You haven’t blown up my phone in a couple days.
🗑️ a text that wasn’t sent.
Aiden: I wish you didn’t come to Wilmington and turn my life upside down. I was so content with my life. For the first time in over 20 years, I finally felt happy. I met someone who just lights up my world and I have the greatest friend group in the world.
Aiden: On the other hand, I am interested in getting to know you, but I need to keep you at a distance. I can’t let “family” back in just to lose them again.
⚡ an angry text.
Aiden: How dare you march all the way to Wilmington from California to find me? Did you not respect me enough to I don’t know, maybe LEAVE ME ALONE?
Aiden: I’ve been through so much stuff and you’re the last thing I need to ruin my life some more.
jamesoncastello:
Status: closed for @aidenjcarter Location: Aiden’s house Time & Date: January 2nd, early evening
After fielding a dozen of calls from Priscilla after first rolling into town a few days before Christmas, Jameson had promised not to approach his half-brother until after the holidays. He didn’t know why the fuck it matter, but after a little bit of thinking, her idea made sense. This was quite a bombshell to drop on someone. Hell, he’d barely wrapped his head around it at all, but the moment the holidays ended - finally - Jaime was checking the file from the PI to look up his address again.
In the car before heading up to the house, Jaime looked at the high school graduation photo attached with the file. He didn’t… look like someone Jaime would’ve ever known. Before putting more thought towards it, Jaime hopped out of his beat up Chevy and marched up to the door, knocking rapidly. He pushed back his long, dark waves and waited.
“Hi!” Jaime greeted with an unsure smile. He very rarely felt out of place, but this? This was surreal. “You’re - Holy shit. You’re actually Aiden. That’s fucking awesome, man. I’m Jaime.”
Aiden was surprised he recovered so quickly from his annual New Year hangover. Maybe he was finally making smarter decisions by keeping himself hydrated throughout the night. The past year had been looking up for Aiden, he met someone that really complemented him, he got his best friend back, and on top of that, he made more friends. He finally felt like he had a family after so many years.
Gathering up the rest of his students’ papers, Aiden opened up his laptop and began entering his grades. Aiden usually had headphones on to keep away all the outside noise. He needed to get the grades entered before he got yelled at by his superior. Through all the noise canceling technology, which seemed to have failed Aiden this one time, Aiden heard a slight faint of what he recognized as a knock on his apartment door.
Aiden wasn’t expecting anyone and the last person who surprised him like this was Emmy. He would’ve been happy to see her and so with a smile on his face, he opened the door, only to be met by someone who wasn’t his friend. “Uh - yes, I’m Aiden,” he quickly replied, kind of creeped out by the other standing outside his front door. Aiden quickly walked outside and closed his door. “Are you some guy trying to sell me a magazine or something?” completely ignoring that the other hand introduced himself.
jamesoncastello:
Status: closed for @aidenjcarter Location: Aiden’s house Time & Date: January 2nd, early evening
After fielding a dozen of calls from Priscilla after first rolling into town a few days before Christmas, Jameson had promised not to approach his half-brother until after the holidays. He didn’t know why the fuck it matter, but after a little bit of thinking, her idea made sense. This was quite a bombshell to drop on someone. Hell, he’d barely wrapped his head around it at all, but the moment the holidays ended - finally - Jaime was checking the file from the PI to look up his address again.
In the car before heading up to the house, Jaime looked at the high school graduation photo attached with the file. He didn’t… look like someone Jaime would’ve ever known. Before putting more thought towards it, Jaime hopped out of his beat up Chevy and marched up to the door, knocking rapidly. He pushed back his long, dark waves and waited.
“Hi!” Jaime greeted with an unsure smile. He very rarely felt out of place, but this? This was surreal. “You’re - Holy shit. You’re actually Aiden. That’s fucking awesome, man. I’m Jaime.”
Aiden was surprised he recovered so quickly from his annual New Year hangover. Maybe he was finally making smarter decisions by keeping himself hydrated throughout the night. The past year had been looking up for Aiden, he met someone that really complemented him, he got his best friend back, and on top of that, he made more friends. He finally felt like he had a family after so many years.
Gathering up the rest of his students’ papers, Aiden opened up his laptop and began entering his grades. Aiden usually had headphones on to keep away all the outside noise. He needed to get the grades entered before he got yelled at by his superior. Through all the noise canceling technology, which seemed to have failed Aiden this one time, Aiden heard a slight faint of what he recognized as a knock on his apartment door.
Aiden wasn’t expecting anyone and the last person who surprised him like this was Emmy. He would’ve been happy to see her and so with a smile on his face, he opened the door, only to be met by someone who wasn’t his friend. “Uh - yes, I’m Aiden,” he quickly replied, kind of creeped out by the other standing outside his front door. Aiden quickly walked outside and closed his door. “Are you some guy trying to sell me a magazine or something?” completely ignoring that the other hand introduced himself.
jamesoncastello:
Somehow, it hadn’t really occurred to Jaime over the past week to rehearse what he would say. He’d never really had a reason to before, always perfectly content to barrel into things blind and overly eager. Now, it was clicking in place why Priscilla had insisted he waited, and why she’d even begged him to leave well enough alone.
— How the fuck did you even break this news?
Jaime’s eyes had been disbelieving when he saw the computer screen results, and that was backed with science. He was just some random dude - a dude who didn’t even look remotely like the guy standing in front of him.
“No, I’m not a salesman,” Jaime promised, hands up to show no flyer or brochure in his grip. Just fingerless gloves, a beanie, a colorful shirt mostly hidden under a thick coat, and black ripped skinny jeans. “I just wanted to meet you. I, uh….” In most circumstances, Jaime never found himself hesitating in his words. “I found you on ancestry.com. We’re related, dude.”
Aiden hadn’t told anyone that he submitted his DNA into a nationwide database. He figured the chances of him finding his biological relatives seemed - distant. Though he didn’t really care to know about the people, he wanted to know if he was prone to any diseases or if he had anything passed down to him through his biological parents. He was happy with the life he lived and the life had had created for himself after leaving San Francisco.
When Jaime spoke, the words didn’t fully process in Aiden’s mind. Sure, he could hear every letter, every syllable, but somehow, nothing was making sense to him. “Um. I’m an only child as far as I know and my parents have never mentioned any relatives and you definitely don’t look like my parents at all,” he continued, not wanting to shout out the fact that he was adopted.
“If this is some type of prank that one of my friends pulled on me, I don’t think it’s very funny and I think you should spend your time doing something else with your life.”
jamesoncastello:
Somehow, it hadn’t really occurred to Jaime over the past week to rehearse what he would say. He’d never really had a reason to before, always perfectly content to barrel into things blind and overly eager. Now, it was clicking in place why Priscilla had insisted he waited, and why she’d even begged him to leave well enough alone.
— How the fuck did you even break this news?
Jaime’s eyes had been disbelieving when he saw the computer screen results, and that was backed with science. He was just some random dude - a dude who didn’t even look remotely like the guy standing in front of him.
“No, I’m not a salesman,” Jaime promised, hands up to show no flyer or brochure in his grip. Just fingerless gloves, a beanie, a colorful shirt mostly hidden under a thick coat, and black ripped skinny jeans. “I just wanted to meet you. I, uh….” In most circumstances, Jaime never found himself hesitating in his words. “I found you on ancestry.com. We’re related, dude.”
Aiden hadn’t told anyone that he submitted his DNA into a nationwide database. He figured the chances of him finding his biological relatives seemed - distant. Though he didn’t really care to know about the people, he wanted to know if he was prone to any diseases or if he had anything passed down to him through his biological parents. He was happy with the life he lived and the life had had created for himself after leaving San Francisco.
When Jaime spoke, the words didn’t fully process in Aiden’s mind. Sure, he could hear every letter, every syllable, but somehow, nothing was making sense to him. “Um. I’m an only child as far as I know and my parents have never mentioned any relatives and you definitely don’t look like my parents at all,” he continued, not wanting to shout out the fact that he was adopted.
“If this is some type of prank that one of my friends pulled on me, I don’t think it’s very funny and I think you should spend your time doing something else with your life.”
jamesoncastello:
This was going poorly. It was the first sobering thought that Jaime had since arriving in Wilmington, and it haunted him straight through. He hadn’t really considered the potential that Aiden wouldn’t want him around. Submitting your DNA on a website like that meant you were ready to accept, and discover, your family, right? Even Jameson knew that was a lie, because he’d been far from ready when he first got the results — but he showed up. He followed through.
Maybe Aiden just needed time. Jaime had gotten time to process, and sure, he’d made the sudden decision to drive all the way to North Carolina from Nevada, but… he got it. It was a lot. Denial had been his first reaction, too. Another layer of shock was added when Jaime considered the possibility that Aiden didn’t know he was adopted… it would be jarring, Jaime supposed, a random dude who was clearly not white showing up promising family relation.
“Uh, no, we’re brothers,” Jaime answered quietly, voice more gentle than it was naturally. He fished for his phone, clicking on photos and scrolling to the screenshot of Aiden’s name, the DNA results, the words match - half brother. DNA shared: maternal. He held up the screen, the silence louder than anything else could be in that moment. “It says we got the same mom.”
Aiden stared at the screenshot, trying to rack up any reason as to why the two would have been related. The two looked distinctly different from each other, but then that would explain the half brother situation. He couldn’t think of any other reason as to how this would even be possible. “H - half brother?” was all he managed to get out. He was shaken to the core. He grew up his whole life thinking that he didn’t have family after the incident.
“You’re not secretly Ashton Kutcher right? No one set you up to do this, right?” Aiden was still in doubt. He was trying to find any reason as to how this couldn’t be possible. “Well - you look nothing like my mother,” continuing to play the narrative that his mother was still around.
Aiden felt weak in the knees and found himself sitting on the ground. Aiden didn’t expect for himself to have this reaction. Did Jaime know that Aiden was adopted? How was this even possible? It angered him too, the fact that Jaime got to stay while Aiden got left behind in the middle of a field. This didn’t make sense. “Wh - Why did you come here?” Aiden wasn’t confrontational and he didn’t know how to muster up the courage to tell Jaime that he didn’t need a brother.
jamesoncastello:
This was going poorly. It was the first sobering thought that Jaime had since arriving in Wilmington, and it haunted him straight through. He hadn’t really considered the potential that Aiden wouldn’t want him around. Submitting your DNA on a website like that meant you were ready to accept, and discover, your family, right? Even Jameson knew that was a lie, because he’d been far from ready when he first got the results — but he showed up. He followed through.
Maybe Aiden just needed time. Jaime had gotten time to process, and sure, he’d made the sudden decision to drive all the way to North Carolina from Nevada, but… he got it. It was a lot. Denial had been his first reaction, too. Another layer of shock was added when Jaime considered the possibility that Aiden didn’t know he was adopted… it would be jarring, Jaime supposed, a random dude who was clearly not white showing up promising family relation.
“Uh, no, we’re brothers,” Jaime answered quietly, voice more gentle than it was naturally. He fished for his phone, clicking on photos and scrolling to the screenshot of Aiden’s name, the DNA results, the words match - half brother. DNA shared: maternal. He held up the screen, the silence louder than anything else could be in that moment. “It says we got the same mom.”
Aiden stared at the screenshot, trying to rack up any reason as to why the two would have been related. The two looked distinctly different from each other, but then that would explain the half brother situation. He couldn’t think of any other reason as to how this would even be possible. “H - half brother?” was all he managed to get out. He was shaken to the core. He grew up his whole life thinking that he didn’t have family after the incident.
“You’re not secretly Ashton Kutcher right? No one set you up to do this, right?” Aiden was still in doubt. He was trying to find any reason as to how this couldn’t be possible. “Well - you look nothing like my mother,” continuing to play the narrative that his mother was still around.
Aiden felt weak in the knees and found himself sitting on the ground. Aiden didn’t expect for himself to have this reaction. Did Jaime know that Aiden was adopted? How was this even possible? It angered him too, the fact that Jaime got to stay while Aiden got left behind in the middle of a field. This didn’t make sense. “Wh - Why did you come here?” Aiden wasn’t confrontational and he didn’t know how to muster up the courage to tell Jaime that he didn’t need a brother.
jamesoncastello:
“Do I look like Ashton Kutcher?” Jaime asked, since the whole race topic had already been eluded too once, and because he hoped it would ease the tension. Things probably couldn’t get more worse, so maybe a little joke would help. Jaime forced out a small laugh, smile but a ghost tugging at his lips, hope still a small little flame in his chest. He’d dropped everything to come here for this man. If he needed to wait a bit for the surprise to wear off, that was fine, as long as Aiden would eventually get his shit together enough to realize that this was a good thing.
It was, right? Jaime’s brow furrowed in confusion. Did his mom lie? Did Aiden remember Priscilla? Their age difference wasn’t huge, and Jaime was pretty sure he’d remember having a brother, even if he was small… too many things weren’t adding up. Now it was Jameson who stared at Aiden with a baffled expression, and it grew more when his brother dropped down to sit on the cold pavement of the porch.
Following suit, because he honestly didn’t know what else to do, Jaime dropped down to the ground as well, pulling his knees together and resting his chin on top of them, arms wrapped around his shins. “Yeah, not one bit,” Jaime agreed to the statement about Priscilla. “She told me you were adopted. I didn’t… I didn’t even know either until awhile ago, I guess I’ve had time to adjust, but… it’s cool, right? I thought, maybe,” Jaime faltered. He’d come here to have a brother. Wasn’t that obvious? This was so foreign, this sense of uncertainty. It reminded him of the way he felt when Brook died. Just gone, leaving him with no plan and a pile of wasted dreams. Jaime hugged his legs tighter. “I just wanted to meet you.”
“No, no you don’t,” Aiden just stared at the other, not even sure how he would be able to string the words together. His half-brother looking like Ashton Kutcher was honestly the furthest thing from his mind. Jaime kept mentioning a she as if Aiden would suddenly know who this person Jaime was referring to.
Of course, Aiden had known he was adopted. He knew the whole story after an incident with a foster parent. Everything had come out into the open, the story of him being abandoned, being founded by his adoptive parents, getting adopted, and everything that fell in between those storylines.
“H - How would she know that I’m adopted?” Aiden was trying to piece everything together, but he just couldn’t figure it out. From what he knew, she had left him in a field, probably left him for dead to be honest. “Whoever she is - ,” Aiden spat out, “she left me in a field, she didn’t even care whether they found me dead or alive. It isn’t cool, Jameson. You got to stay. You don’t know what it feels like, what your mother did to me. Sure, genetics say that we share the same parent, but this woman means nothing to me. You don’t even know what I’ve been through.”
“I was perfectly happy in my life. I had my dream job, I met my dream girl, my best friend came back in town, I finally had a family again. Yeah, of course, you wanted to meet me because you didn’t have to experience what it was like to lose your parents at the same time when you were my child. My parents died in a car crash when I was a child. I grew up as an only child, and only person in this cold, harsh world. Maybe if your mother hadn’t left me in a field, maybe things would be different, maybe I would’ve been cool with having a brother. But when you grow up alone, you don’t know what it’s like to want a sibling because all you can do it fight for yourself. I had to make a life for myself when the two people who saved my life left. Your mother didn’t care about me. She’s clearly lying. Maybe she needs to get her facts straight because even my case worker never knew who left me in that field. Your mother ruined my life, my chance to have a happy ending.”
Aiden wasn’t the type of person who would just open up about his family or what he’s been through, but he figured this person needed to know. He wanted nothing to do with Jameson in this moment. This just turned his world upside down.
jamesoncastello:
“Do I look like Ashton Kutcher?” Jaime asked, since the whole race topic had already been eluded too once, and because he hoped it would ease the tension. Things probably couldn’t get more worse, so maybe a little joke would help. Jaime forced out a small laugh, smile but a ghost tugging at his lips, hope still a small little flame in his chest. He’d dropped everything to come here for this man. If he needed to wait a bit for the surprise to wear off, that was fine, as long as Aiden would eventually get his shit together enough to realize that this was a good thing.
It was, right? Jaime’s brow furrowed in confusion. Did his mom lie? Did Aiden remember Priscilla? Their age difference wasn’t huge, and Jaime was pretty sure he’d remember having a brother, even if he was small… too many things weren’t adding up. Now it was Jameson who stared at Aiden with a baffled expression, and it grew more when his brother dropped down to sit on the cold pavement of the porch.
Following suit, because he honestly didn’t know what else to do, Jaime dropped down to the ground as well, pulling his knees together and resting his chin on top of them, arms wrapped around his shins. “Yeah, not one bit,” Jaime agreed to the statement about Priscilla. “She told me you were adopted. I didn’t… I didn’t even know either until awhile ago, I guess I’ve had time to adjust, but… it’s cool, right? I thought, maybe,” Jaime faltered. He’d come here to have a brother. Wasn’t that obvious? This was so foreign, this sense of uncertainty. It reminded him of the way he felt when Brook died. Just gone, leaving him with no plan and a pile of wasted dreams. Jaime hugged his legs tighter. “I just wanted to meet you.”
“No, no you don’t,” Aiden just stared at the other, not even sure how he would be able to string the words together. His half-brother looking like Ashton Kutcher was honestly the furthest thing from his mind. Jaime kept mentioning a she as if Aiden would suddenly know who this person Jaime was referring to.
Of course, Aiden had known he was adopted. He knew the whole story after an incident with a foster parent. Everything had come out into the open, the story of him being abandoned, being founded by his adoptive parents, getting adopted, and everything that fell in between those storylines.
“H - How would she know that I’m adopted?” Aiden was trying to piece everything together, but he just couldn’t figure it out. From what he knew, she had left him in a field, probably left him for dead to be honest. “Whoever she is - ,” Aiden spat out, “she left me in a field, she didn’t even care whether they found me dead or alive. It isn’t cool, Jameson. You got to stay. You don’t know what it feels like, what your mother did to me. Sure, genetics say that we share the same parent, but this woman means nothing to me. You don’t even know what I’ve been through.”
“I was perfectly happy in my life. I had my dream job, I met my dream girl, my best friend came back in town, I finally had a family again. Yeah, of course, you wanted to meet me because you didn’t have to experience what it was like to lose your parents at the same time when you were my child. My parents died in a car crash when I was a child. I grew up as an only child, and only person in this cold, harsh world. Maybe if your mother hadn’t left me in a field, maybe things would be different, maybe I would’ve been cool with having a brother. But when you grow up alone, you don’t know what it’s like to want a sibling because all you can do it fight for yourself. I had to make a life for myself when the two people who saved my life left. Your mother didn’t care about me. She’s clearly lying. Maybe she needs to get her facts straight because even my case worker never knew who left me in that field. Your mother ruined my life, my chance to have a happy ending.”
Aiden wasn’t the type of person who would just open up about his family or what he’s been through, but he figured this person needed to know. He wanted nothing to do with Jameson in this moment. This just turned his world upside down.
jamesoncastello:
The words that came out of Aiden’s mouth were enough to make Jaime’s brain to stall, turning their sounds over in his mind like a dead engine, trying to twist them to fit the vision he’d already created for the two of them - for his family as a whole. Aiden’s version of things suggested something else entirely, and Jaime felt his stomach sinking even as he shook his head to deny the allegations. “No, no - she said you were adopted. She was just really young, so she put you up for adoption,” Jaime answered, feeling like a parrot, repeating Priscilla’s words.
As if she didn’t have a history of lying, bending the truth, covering sins with pretty bows that made her look a martyr. Still - wouldn’t that be too much? Potentially murdering a child, abandon them? As much as Jaime claimed to hate his mother, he wasn’t ready just yet to take a strangers word for it. Even if it did fit in nicely. Even if it did explain Priscilla’s intense disagreement with him finding Aiden in the first place. It also meant, and became increasingly more clear, that Aiden really wouldn’t want anything to do with Jaime.
It was anger that he felt first. The more Aiden talked, the more pissed off Jaime felt. You didn’t have to grow up alone. You don’t know what it’s like. Most of Jaime’s childhood memories were of caring for himself, and for Priscilla. Leaving coffee on the table by the couch where she’d passed out, hoping maybe she’d be awake by the time he was home from school. Not inviting friends over for fear of them seeing Priscilla in another one of her fits. Maybe he wasn’t alone in actuality, like Aiden claims to have been, but he definitely didn’t grow up with some any semblance of a mother, either.
“Yeah, you had it rough, obviously,” Jaime’s tone was bitter, far harsher than he meant it, but he made no move to stand up from his position on the floor of the porch. He didn’t know this guy. It had been foolish to assume the reaction he’d wanted was what he’d get, and now it felt confusing and scary. “And it’s not my mother here now, it’s me, and I basically-” Jaime’s throat closed and he had to clear it to continue talking. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You got lucky. Growing up without Priscilla was a goddamn blessing, and I’m sorry about your other parents, but like you said - you’re doing good now. So, what’s the fuckin’ problem, dude?”
Aiden was probably being selfish in this moment, thinking of only himself, but that was what most of his life had consisted of. Of course he couldn’t imagine what life would have been like with Priscilla because he never got to experience that. On the other hand, he had his childhood ripped away from him, he felt abandonment more than once in his life, and all of that had made him turn cold at the thought of ever having a relationship with his biological half-brother. Aiden should have known better than to submit his DNA on ancestry.com, but he figured that nothing would come of it. He didn’t expect for someone to come knocking on his door.
“Well, I think this lady has to reevaluate what she’s done. I was on the paper too at one point. Your mother left me in a field. I don’t know how many times I can say it. Thankfully I was found and it was summer so it wasn’t as cold as it would’ve been during a winter night. I was never put up for adoption. From what I’ve been told by the case lady, they had no idea who my biological family was. I wasn’t even left with a note or anything. I don’t want to be rude because clearly I don’t know you or your family, but it could be that your mother is trying to not look bad by saying that she just placed me up for adoption.” Aiden sighed deeply, sure that the whole apartment complex could hear him.
“She could have surrendered me at the fire station or the police station. They have places like that for people who want to surrender their children. I don’t know what to say. I know nothing about your mother and up until now, I haven’t really thought about her,” Aiden admitted. Sure, he had a genetic connection to this woman, but genetics meant nothing and in this case blood didn’t run thicker than water. Eleanor and Nicholas were his family and unfortunately the chance of having the normal family life was taken away from him.
“I got lucky? How was I so lucky when something so horrible happened to my parents and I had to be the witness of it at five years old. How was I lucky when I was constantly being bounced around home to home with no stability? At least you had one parental figure, a constant one at that. We can go on and on about comparing our lives and how we both had it shitty. I’m sorry if Priscilla wasn’t a great mother to you, but I had to go through a lot of hard shit to have a good life. I literally moved to the other side of this country to get away from everything. Yeah, sure, I got a good life lined up, but it doesn’t mean that I still don’t think about how I got abandoned or the fact that I didn’t know what it was like to have a family for most of my life. I can’t even remember what my parents sound like and I crave to hear their voices one more time. You have that chance. Even if you don’t have a good relationship with this woman, you can still hear her voice, you can still see her. My memories of my parents dwindle away every day. My only memories of them are placed in photographs.”
Aiden blinked, tears continuing to shed. “Look, at the end of the day, I don’t know you. I didn’t expect for someone to randomly come knocking on my door to tell me that I suddenly had a biological family again. How did you even find me?”
jamesoncastello:
The words that came out of Aiden’s mouth were enough to make Jaime’s brain to stall, turning their sounds over in his mind like a dead engine, trying to twist them to fit the vision he’d already created for the two of them - for his family as a whole. Aiden’s version of things suggested something else entirely, and Jaime felt his stomach sinking even as he shook his head to deny the allegations. “No, no - she said you were adopted. She was just really young, so she put you up for adoption,” Jaime answered, feeling like a parrot, repeating Priscilla’s words.
As if she didn’t have a history of lying, bending the truth, covering sins with pretty bows that made her look a martyr. Still - wouldn’t that be too much? Potentially murdering a child, abandon them? As much as Jaime claimed to hate his mother, he wasn’t ready just yet to take a strangers word for it. Even if it did fit in nicely. Even if it did explain Priscilla’s intense disagreement with him finding Aiden in the first place. It also meant, and became increasingly more clear, that Aiden really wouldn’t want anything to do with Jaime.
It was anger that he felt first. The more Aiden talked, the more pissed off Jaime felt. You didn’t have to grow up alone. You don’t know what it’s like. Most of Jaime’s childhood memories were of caring for himself, and for Priscilla. Leaving coffee on the table by the couch where she’d passed out, hoping maybe she’d be awake by the time he was home from school. Not inviting friends over for fear of them seeing Priscilla in another one of her fits. Maybe he wasn’t alone in actuality, like Aiden claims to have been, but he definitely didn’t grow up with some any semblance of a mother, either.
“Yeah, you had it rough, obviously,” Jaime’s tone was bitter, far harsher than he meant it, but he made no move to stand up from his position on the floor of the porch. He didn’t know this guy. It had been foolish to assume the reaction he’d wanted was what he’d get, and now it felt confusing and scary. “And it’s not my mother here now, it’s me, and I basically-” Jaime’s throat closed and he had to clear it to continue talking. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You got lucky. Growing up without Priscilla was a goddamn blessing, and I’m sorry about your other parents, but like you said - you’re doing good now. So, what’s the fuckin’ problem, dude?”
Aiden was probably being selfish in this moment, thinking of only himself, but that was what most of his life had consisted of. Of course he couldn’t imagine what life would have been like with Priscilla because he never got to experience that. On the other hand, he had his childhood ripped away from him, he felt abandonment more than once in his life, and all of that had made him turn cold at the thought of ever having a relationship with his biological half-brother. Aiden should have known better than to submit his DNA on ancestry.com, but he figured that nothing would come of it. He didn’t expect for someone to come knocking on his door.
“Well, I think this lady has to reevaluate what she’s done. I was on the paper too at one point. Your mother left me in a field. I don’t know how many times I can say it. Thankfully I was found and it was summer so it wasn’t as cold as it would’ve been during a winter night. I was never put up for adoption. From what I’ve been told by the case lady, they had no idea who my biological family was. I wasn’t even left with a note or anything. I don’t want to be rude because clearly I don’t know you or your family, but it could be that your mother is trying to not look bad by saying that she just placed me up for adoption.” Aiden sighed deeply, sure that the whole apartment complex could hear him.
“She could have surrendered me at the fire station or the police station. They have places like that for people who want to surrender their children. I don’t know what to say. I know nothing about your mother and up until now, I haven’t really thought about her,” Aiden admitted. Sure, he had a genetic connection to this woman, but genetics meant nothing and in this case blood didn’t run thicker than water. Eleanor and Nicholas were his family and unfortunately the chance of having the normal family life was taken away from him.
“I got lucky? How was I so lucky when something so horrible happened to my parents and I had to be the witness of it at five years old. How was I lucky when I was constantly being bounced around home to home with no stability? At least you had one parental figure, a constant one at that. We can go on and on about comparing our lives and how we both had it shitty. I’m sorry if Priscilla wasn’t a great mother to you, but I had to go through a lot of hard shit to have a good life. I literally moved to the other side of this country to get away from everything. Yeah, sure, I got a good life lined up, but it doesn’t mean that I still don’t think about how I got abandoned or the fact that I didn’t know what it was like to have a family for most of my life. I can’t even remember what my parents sound like and I crave to hear their voices one more time. You have that chance. Even if you don’t have a good relationship with this woman, you can still hear her voice, you can still see her. My memories of my parents dwindle away every day. My only memories of them are placed in photographs.”
Aiden blinked, tears continuing to shed. “Look, at the end of the day, I don’t know you. I didn’t expect for someone to randomly come knocking on my door to tell me that I suddenly had a biological family again. How did you even find me?”
jamesoncastello:
“Yeah… look, man,” Jaime took in a deep breath, trying to make sense of the confusing information he was being fed. Lying wasn’t something that his- their mother was a stranger too, but Jaime wasn’t sure if he was ready to believe something so terrible about her. All the things he had forgiven… Jameson was terrified this could be something he wouldn’t be able to accept. For the moment, he compartmentalized that, storing it for later analysis. “It’s not her who is here. It’s me. She doesn’t matter, man.”
He was maybe a bit too desperate in his approach. It was clear very quickly to the artist that his brother was falling apart at the seams. As Aiden continued talking, Jaime felt himself switching off emotionally more and more. The same thing happened when Brook died, after the funeral. Mostly when he went back to dating, started to look at people again with interest. Whenever something did stick, he felt detached, removed. Unable to be objective and feel open to everything.
Jaime was shutting down, as Aiden blocked him out. His expression was hard now, tears stinging in his own eyes. What could he even do now? Priscilla, of course, had kept the biggest details hidden from him, and now he was in the role of the asshole for just showing up. He had a job here now; a roommate, possibly, if he really did take Sirena up on it.
“Yeah, I still hear her voice. Okay? Sorry. I’m sorry it was me, alone, who had to drag her to the bathroom when I was 7, or call 911 like, five times. I’m sorry it was me, alone, who had to hold the door shut when another one of her useless boyfriends tried to break in. Look, I’m sorry-” Jaime stopped short, realizing his voice had raised and he was now yelling. This had gone poorly. He stood quickly, body stiff from the cold and squished position he sat in, tense from the stress. Every bad moment with Priscilla, and there were many, had been yanked up from the depths of his heart. It wasn’t Aiden’s fault, but it wasn’t his, either. “We could be family. You know that. That’s - that’s how. You’re family. I found you because that’s… what I thought we were.”
Aiden understood that it was his biological half-brother who took the step to meet him. He processed most of the things that the brunette was saying. Looking in the mirror, he wasn’t sure if they had any similar physical qualities. The only thing in common was half their blood, but even then, Aiden was still unsure. He took it for what it was, but still was hesitant to accept a human being into his life as family. “I understand that - but she does matter, she wrote my whole life story, my childhood, even now,” Aiden admitted something he never thought he did.
“I understand that you were the one who came to look for me, but how can I not think of her when I see you? You are a reminder that she chose you and left me behind. It’s really nothing against you. I’m just mad at her,” refusing to mention Priscilla’s name. It took Aiden a long time to get close to people again after the incident and after he moved to Wilmington. He had his own family now, his chosen family. He couldn’t understand why someone would travel all the way to Wilmington to meet him when it seemed that the other’s life wasn’t exactly in the best shape.
“I’m sorry that you had to go through that,” Aiden sincerely apologized, not entirely sure how to be empathetic about the situation. Up until he was five, Aiden had the most ideal family situation. He knew how much his parents loved him and he saw it as a blessing. “I just feel unwanted,” Aiden never thought he would use that word. It was something he refused to believe, but in this moment, it was the only word that could come to mind. “I get that you want to meet me and that you want to be family, but it isn’t that easy for me. I’ve had my trust broken by your mother. I’ve been abandoned time and time again. It took me a long time to trust the people in my life. I just don’t think it’s realistic for someone to enter my life and expect for me to welcome them with open arms. We haven’t battled the same war, but we’ve both fought hards in our own respective lives. I appreciate you coming here and meeting me. It’s nice to know that deep in this universe, I have a biological relative who cared enough to make the effort. I wish I could give you what you want to hear, that I see you as family, but the truth is, I can’t accept it that way. My perception of family is different. I need time, to process this, to deal with all this. I just need to know how on Earth you found me because I have a very common name.”
jamesoncastello:
“Yeah… look, man,” Jaime took in a deep breath, trying to make sense of the confusing information he was being fed. Lying wasn’t something that his- their mother was a stranger too, but Jaime wasn’t sure if he was ready to believe something so terrible about her. All the things he had forgiven… Jameson was terrified this could be something he wouldn’t be able to accept. For the moment, he compartmentalized that, storing it for later analysis. “It’s not her who is here. It’s me. She doesn’t matter, man.”
He was maybe a bit too desperate in his approach. It was clear very quickly to the artist that his brother was falling apart at the seams. As Aiden continued talking, Jaime felt himself switching off emotionally more and more. The same thing happened when Brook died, after the funeral. Mostly when he went back to dating, started to look at people again with interest. Whenever something did stick, he felt detached, removed. Unable to be objective and feel open to everything.
Jaime was shutting down, as Aiden blocked him out. His expression was hard now, tears stinging in his own eyes. What could he even do now? Priscilla, of course, had kept the biggest details hidden from him, and now he was in the role of the asshole for just showing up. He had a job here now; a roommate, possibly, if he really did take Sirena up on it.
“Yeah, I still hear her voice. Okay? Sorry. I’m sorry it was me, alone, who had to drag her to the bathroom when I was 7, or call 911 like, five times. I’m sorry it was me, alone, who had to hold the door shut when another one of her useless boyfriends tried to break in. Look, I’m sorry-” Jaime stopped short, realizing his voice had raised and he was now yelling. This had gone poorly. He stood quickly, body stiff from the cold and squished position he sat in, tense from the stress. Every bad moment with Priscilla, and there were many, had been yanked up from the depths of his heart. It wasn’t Aiden’s fault, but it wasn’t his, either. “We could be family. You know that. That’s - that’s how. You’re family. I found you because that’s… what I thought we were.”
Aiden understood that it was his biological half-brother who took the step to meet him. He processed most of the things that the brunette was saying. Looking in the mirror, he wasn’t sure if they had any similar physical qualities. The only thing in common was half their blood, but even then, Aiden was still unsure. He took it for what it was, but still was hesitant to accept a human being into his life as family. “I understand that - but she does matter, she wrote my whole life story, my childhood, even now,” Aiden admitted something he never thought he did.
“I understand that you were the one who came to look for me, but how can I not think of her when I see you? You are a reminder that she chose you and left me behind. It’s really nothing against you. I’m just mad at her,” refusing to mention Priscilla’s name. It took Aiden a long time to get close to people again after the incident and after he moved to Wilmington. He had his own family now, his chosen family. He couldn’t understand why someone would travel all the way to Wilmington to meet him when it seemed that the other’s life wasn’t exactly in the best shape.
“I’m sorry that you had to go through that,” Aiden sincerely apologized, not entirely sure how to be empathetic about the situation. Up until he was five, Aiden had the most ideal family situation. He knew how much his parents loved him and he saw it as a blessing. “I just feel unwanted,” Aiden never thought he would use that word. It was something he refused to believe, but in this moment, it was the only word that could come to mind. “I get that you want to meet me and that you want to be family, but it isn’t that easy for me. I’ve had my trust broken by your mother. I’ve been abandoned time and time again. It took me a long time to trust the people in my life. I just don’t think it’s realistic for someone to enter my life and expect for me to welcome them with open arms. We haven’t battled the same war, but we’ve both fought hards in our own respective lives. I appreciate you coming here and meeting me. It’s nice to know that deep in this universe, I have a biological relative who cared enough to make the effort. I wish I could give you what you want to hear, that I see you as family, but the truth is, I can’t accept it that way. My perception of family is different. I need time, to process this, to deal with all this. I just need to know how on Earth you found me because I have a very common name.”
jamesoncastello:
I’m mad at her, too. The words never made it out of Jaime’s throat. Giving Aiden that little peek into the troubles he endured as a kid, trying to grow up alone and neglected; all of it, the whole night so far… it had been enough to make Jaime wish he’d never spoken a word. Those pieces of himself were not offered up freely, they weren’t a sample to pick at and discard.
Which is how Jaime felt right then.
Discarded.
The worst part about it? Jaime was sickeningly aware that Aiden felt the exact same, by Priscilla, thrown aside like he never mattered. It was a shared bitterness, but one that neither of them could mend at the moment. Jaime was resilient. He never gave up. Nothing could sway him when he decided he wanted something, and oh, he wanted this. He wanted a brother, and if Aiden was his only shot?
“Well… I’m sticking around for awhile,” Jaime said finally, voice gruff, holding back emotion. It had been so apparent moments before, but now a door had closed. “She’s not my mother, she’s ours.” Though, at this point, after such a… polite but staggeringly painful motivational speech, Jaime was just as suspicious as Aiden had been about their actual relation. The two couldn’t be more different, that was obvious. The younger sibling could feel the anger beginning to surge, threatening to crack the cool, barely collected surface. He knew the consequences of losing his shit at that moment, especially when Aiden had been so- well, whatever. Jaime certainly wasn’t going to think of the word gracious, despite it’s accuracy.
It wasn’t a no. Aiden said process. But… he also asked a question, again, that Jaime did not want to answer. After spewing such intimate details of his own trauma, it felt wrong to bring up the whole super perfect step-dad who had ‘saved’ the family. Not that Jaime wanted anything to do with it, but… he could see how that would go over with Aiden, already feeling unwanted. “I’m a fuckin’ super spy, dude, what do you want me to say? Anyone can be found if they’re wanted enough.” Subtle dig, but intentional nonetheless. Jaime held Aiden’s gaze for a moment, secretly hoping the words sunk in. “See ya ‘round, brother.”
Aiden tried to examine the other body’s language, wondering how weird it was for the other person as well. Aiden of course had to give the brunette credit for even willing to show up to someone’s door to announce that the two were half-siblings. He wasn’t going to admit it, but part of him felt slightly okay, to know that there was still family. Then the other part of him knew that it was different, to know that the two shared the same bloodline, but that was the extent of their relationship. Although Aiden and Grayson were only best friends, Aiden felt more of a sibling relationship toward his friend than he did to his stranger who just showed up a couple hours ago.
Aiden didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t force the other to leave town. It wasn’t his right. He didn’t know if Jaime had just come to visit for a week or if Jaime had found a place to stay and was making a living for himself already in Wilmington. Aiden knew he was bound to run into the other sooner or later and part of him was nervous about that. If this was how their first interaction was going to be, he didn’t know how things would be down the line if the two bumped into each other again. Of course, Aiden would be cordial, but that was just something he knew he had to be. He felt obligated to be nice to this stranger.
Aiden didn’t know what to say every time that Jaime kept referring to Priscilla as their mother. “Look, I get that you’re trying to get me to acknowledge that we’re brothers, which I do. I acknowledge that we’re biological brothers, but your mother isn’t mine. My mother was the person who chose to keep me, to love me, to make me feel wanted every second of the day. Sure, she gave me half my DNA, but that’s the extent of my relationship to that woman, so please don’t say she’s our mother when I don’t even know anything about her except for her first name.” Aiden had never been curious enough like some other adoptees to try to find his biological family. He didn’t have a desire to after hearing about what Priscilla had done to him.
Aiden understood that Jaime wanted to find him, but he just wasn’t ready. It was a lot of information at once for the 27 year-old. Sure, of course, part of him wished he could invite Jaime inside so that the two could get to know each other, but this was just how Aiden dealt with things. He needed time. He didn’t want the situation to only get worse from here. “I highly doubt you’re a spy. I just want to know the answer to how you found me, but it’s obvious that you’re avoiding it so I don’t know why I’m going to keep pushing it. Like how I don’t know why you would push me to say that Priscilla is our mother,” he spat out, unsure of where that comment even came from. He didn’t want to feel the pain he was feeling, but how could he help it? “Bye,” Aiden muttered, giving Jaime one final look before walking back into his apartment, unsure of where he stood in his emotions.
THE END
jamesoncastello:
I’m mad at her, too. The words never made it out of Jaime’s throat. Giving Aiden that little peek into the troubles he endured as a kid, trying to grow up alone and neglected; all of it, the whole night so far… it had been enough to make Jaime wish he’d never spoken a word. Those pieces of himself were not offered up freely, they weren’t a sample to pick at and discard.
Which is how Jaime felt right then.
Discarded.
The worst part about it? Jaime was sickeningly aware that Aiden felt the exact same, by Priscilla, thrown aside like he never mattered. It was a shared bitterness, but one that neither of them could mend at the moment. Jaime was resilient. He never gave up. Nothing could sway him when he decided he wanted something, and oh, he wanted this. He wanted a brother, and if Aiden was his only shot?
“Well… I’m sticking around for awhile,” Jaime said finally, voice gruff, holding back emotion. It had been so apparent moments before, but now a door had closed. “She’s not my mother, she’s ours.” Though, at this point, after such a… polite but staggeringly painful motivational speech, Jaime was just as suspicious as Aiden had been about their actual relation. The two couldn’t be more different, that was obvious. The younger sibling could feel the anger beginning to surge, threatening to crack the cool, barely collected surface. He knew the consequences of losing his shit at that moment, especially when Aiden had been so- well, whatever. Jaime certainly wasn’t going to think of the word gracious, despite it’s accuracy.
It wasn’t a no. Aiden said process. But… he also asked a question, again, that Jaime did not want to answer. After spewing such intimate details of his own trauma, it felt wrong to bring up the whole super perfect step-dad who had ‘saved’ the family. Not that Jaime wanted anything to do with it, but… he could see how that would go over with Aiden, already feeling unwanted. “I’m a fuckin’ super spy, dude, what do you want me to say? Anyone can be found if they’re wanted enough.” Subtle dig, but intentional nonetheless. Jaime held Aiden’s gaze for a moment, secretly hoping the words sunk in. “See ya ‘round, brother.”
Aiden tried to examine the other body’s language, wondering how weird it was for the other person as well. Aiden of course had to give the brunette credit for even willing to show up to someone’s door to announce that the two were half-siblings. He wasn’t going to admit it, but part of him felt slightly okay, to know that there was still family. Then the other part of him knew that it was different, to know that the two shared the same bloodline, but that was the extent of their relationship. Although Aiden and Grayson were only best friends, Aiden felt more of a sibling relationship toward his friend than he did to his stranger who just showed up a couple hours ago.
Aiden didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t force the other to leave town. It wasn’t his right. He didn’t know if Jaime had just come to visit for a week or if Jaime had found a place to stay and was making a living for himself already in Wilmington. Aiden knew he was bound to run into the other sooner or later and part of him was nervous about that. If this was how their first interaction was going to be, he didn’t know how things would be down the line if the two bumped into each other again. Of course, Aiden would be cordial, but that was just something he knew he had to be. He felt obligated to be nice to this stranger.
Aiden didn’t know what to say every time that Jaime kept referring to Priscilla as their mother. “Look, I get that you’re trying to get me to acknowledge that we’re brothers, which I do. I acknowledge that we’re biological brothers, but your mother isn’t mine. My mother was the person who chose to keep me, to love me, to make me feel wanted every second of the day. Sure, she gave me half my DNA, but that’s the extent of my relationship to that woman, so please don’t say she’s our mother when I don’t even know anything about her except for her first name.” Aiden had never been curious enough like some other adoptees to try to find his biological family. He didn’t have a desire to after hearing about what Priscilla had done to him.
Aiden understood that Jaime wanted to find him, but he just wasn’t ready. It was a lot of information at once for the 27 year-old. Sure, of course, part of him wished he could invite Jaime inside so that the two could get to know each other, but this was just how Aiden dealt with things. He needed time. He didn’t want the situation to only get worse from here. “I highly doubt you’re a spy. I just want to know the answer to how you found me, but it’s obvious that you’re avoiding it so I don’t know why I’m going to keep pushing it. Like how I don’t know why you would push me to say that Priscilla is our mother,” he spat out, unsure of where that comment even came from. He didn’t want to feel the pain he was feeling, but how could he help it? “Bye,” Aiden muttered, giving Jaime one final look before walking back into his apartment, unsure of where he stood in his emotions.
THE END
jamesoncastello:
In the past couple of weeks that Jaime had been figuring out how he fit into the world Wilmington presented him; and in doing so, if he could truly belong in that world anyway, he’d managed to somehow dust himself off from the setback and set about his normal path. At this point, loss was a habit, a process he knew inside and out, and it was a special sort of bond he shared with his own blood - but didn’t know it yet. Not the full extent. Aiden had loss littering his life in the form of abandonment, but Jaime had the loss repeated in his life as he watched his mother choose drugs over him, again and again.
By now, he felt almost rubbed raw, numb to the sensation of it. Being cast aside; unwanted, tainted, not worth choosing. It wasn’t like anyone picked the short kid with long hair for dodge-ball, so Jaime had learned how to matter in other, less conventional ways. Sometimes, even that didn’t feel like enough, and when he heard Aiden’s voice at the counter, he felt betrayed by his own heart. The way it jumped into his throat with hope, the fear of rejection once more. How could his own being, who fought so hard to live for so long, choose to allow his hopes to rise against with just the sound of his brother’s voice. The word felt forbidden.
“I’m here,” Jaime answered for himself, poking his head out of the doorway. In his hand, a tablet, a work still in progress. There was no client in his room at the time. His expression was guarded, but a glint of something else - wanting, maybe, a question in his apprehensive gaze. Was Aiden here to just make his point again, chase Jaime off? Another part of him still battled with the constant, bitter anger that felt just below the surface; was he good enough to be a tattoo artist, but not a brother? Not family? “Making an appointment, or?”
How the tables have turned that now Aiden was the one looking for his brother in town. Of course, he wasn’t a spy and it was pretty easy to find Jameson. To be honest, he wasn’t ready for another confrontation. One was more than enough for Aiden’s lifetime. He wasn’t exactly one to confront people and he didn’t see this as a confrontation. He saw it as an olive branch, a peace offering. He hoped that seeing his half-brother in the flesh once again would bring up different feelings rather than feelings of hurt and anger.
“No, I don’t do tattoos, I think you took all those genes,” he said, making a joke, hoping that this would lighten up the mood. “I just - I wanted to talk. Is there any way we could step outside or something?” Aiden walked outside, finding a bench and just sat down on it. He was hoping that this conversation wouldn’t be heard by all of Jameson’s coworkers. Having a deep conversation in public wasn’t Aiden’s forte, but there wasn’t many places he could go to.
“I - I apologize for how I reacted when you came to see me. Truth be told, I grew up a lone wolf. You already know the whole deal with my parents and stuff. I kind of never knew what it was like to have family up until I moved here. I guess it’s different, having a chosen family versus having a family you can’t pick. What I’m saying is that, it was a lot for me to handle and I didn’t handle it in the best way possible,” he took a deep breath. “I know that we barely know each other besides both our shitty pasts and each other’s names. Shit, I don’t even know your last name. I figured you know mine since you came to spy on me or whatever.”
“It’s overwhelming, that’s for sure, when someone waltz into your life and make themselves known as your half-brother. I can’t say that we’re going to be best friends, but I’m willing to give you a shot of being my brother, whatever that entails.”
jamesoncastello:
In the past couple of weeks that Jaime had been figuring out how he fit into the world Wilmington presented him; and in doing so, if he could truly belong in that world anyway, he’d managed to somehow dust himself off from the setback and set about his normal path. At this point, loss was a habit, a process he knew inside and out, and it was a special sort of bond he shared with his own blood - but didn’t know it yet. Not the full extent. Aiden had loss littering his life in the form of abandonment, but Jaime had the loss repeated in his life as he watched his mother choose drugs over him, again and again.
By now, he felt almost rubbed raw, numb to the sensation of it. Being cast aside; unwanted, tainted, not worth choosing. It wasn’t like anyone picked the short kid with long hair for dodge-ball, so Jaime had learned how to matter in other, less conventional ways. Sometimes, even that didn’t feel like enough, and when he heard Aiden’s voice at the counter, he felt betrayed by his own heart. The way it jumped into his throat with hope, the fear of rejection once more. How could his own being, who fought so hard to live for so long, choose to allow his hopes to rise against with just the sound of his brother’s voice. The word felt forbidden.
“I’m here,” Jaime answered for himself, poking his head out of the doorway. In his hand, a tablet, a work still in progress. There was no client in his room at the time. His expression was guarded, but a glint of something else - wanting, maybe, a question in his apprehensive gaze. Was Aiden here to just make his point again, chase Jaime off? Another part of him still battled with the constant, bitter anger that felt just below the surface; was he good enough to be a tattoo artist, but not a brother? Not family? “Making an appointment, or?”
How the tables have turned that now Aiden was the one looking for his brother in town. Of course, he wasn’t a spy and it was pretty easy to find Jameson. To be honest, he wasn’t ready for another confrontation. One was more than enough for Aiden’s lifetime. He wasn’t exactly one to confront people and he didn’t see this as a confrontation. He saw it as an olive branch, a peace offering. He hoped that seeing his half-brother in the flesh once again would bring up different feelings rather than feelings of hurt and anger.
“No, I don’t do tattoos, I think you took all those genes,” he said, making a joke, hoping that this would lighten up the mood. “I just - I wanted to talk. Is there any way we could step outside or something?” Aiden walked outside, finding a bench and just sat down on it. He was hoping that this conversation wouldn’t be heard by all of Jameson’s coworkers. Having a deep conversation in public wasn’t Aiden’s forte, but there wasn’t many places he could go to.
“I - I apologize for how I reacted when you came to see me. Truth be told, I grew up a lone wolf. You already know the whole deal with my parents and stuff. I kind of never knew what it was like to have family up until I moved here. I guess it’s different, having a chosen family versus having a family you can’t pick. What I’m saying is that, it was a lot for me to handle and I didn’t handle it in the best way possible,” he took a deep breath. “I know that we barely know each other besides both our shitty pasts and each other’s names. Shit, I don’t even know your last name. I figured you know mine since you came to spy on me or whatever.”
“It’s overwhelming, that’s for sure, when someone waltz into your life and make themselves known as your half-brother. I can’t say that we’re going to be best friends, but I’m willing to give you a shot of being my brother, whatever that entails.”
jamesoncastello:
In the past couple of weeks that Jaime had been figuring out how he fit into the world Wilmington presented him; and in doing so, if he could truly belong in that world anyway, he’d managed to somehow dust himself off from the setback and set about his normal path. At this point, loss was a habit, a process he knew inside and out, and it was a special sort of bond he shared with his own blood - but didn’t know it yet. Not the full extent. Aiden had loss littering his life in the form of abandonment, but Jaime had the loss repeated in his life as he watched his mother choose drugs over him, again and again.
By now, he felt almost rubbed raw, numb to the sensation of it. Being cast aside; unwanted, tainted, not worth choosing. It wasn’t like anyone picked the short kid with long hair for dodge-ball, so Jaime had learned how to matter in other, less conventional ways. Sometimes, even that didn’t feel like enough, and when he heard Aiden’s voice at the counter, he felt betrayed by his own heart. The way it jumped into his throat with hope, the fear of rejection once more. How could his own being, who fought so hard to live for so long, choose to allow his hopes to rise against with just the sound of his brother’s voice. The word felt forbidden.
“I’m here,” Jaime answered for himself, poking his head out of the doorway. In his hand, a tablet, a work still in progress. There was no client in his room at the time. His expression was guarded, but a glint of something else - wanting, maybe, a question in his apprehensive gaze. Was Aiden here to just make his point again, chase Jaime off? Another part of him still battled with the constant, bitter anger that felt just below the surface; was he good enough to be a tattoo artist, but not a brother? Not family? “Making an appointment, or?”
How the tables have turned that now Aiden was the one looking for his brother in town. Of course, he wasn’t a spy and it was pretty easy to find Jameson. To be honest, he wasn’t ready for another confrontation. One was more than enough for Aiden’s lifetime. He wasn’t exactly one to confront people and he didn’t see this as a confrontation. He saw it as an olive branch, a peace offering. He hoped that seeing his half-brother in the flesh once again would bring up different feelings rather than feelings of hurt and anger.
“No, I don’t do tattoos, I think you took all those genes,” he said, making a joke, hoping that this would lighten up the mood. “I just - I wanted to talk. Is there any way we could step outside or something?” Aiden walked outside, finding a bench and just sat down on it. He was hoping that this conversation wouldn’t be heard by all of Jameson’s coworkers. Having a deep conversation in public wasn’t Aiden’s forte, but there wasn’t many places he could go to.
“I - I apologize for how I reacted when you came to see me. Truth be told, I grew up a lone wolf. You already know the whole deal with my parents and stuff. I kind of never knew what it was like to have family up until I moved here. I guess it’s different, having a chosen family versus having a family you can’t pick. What I’m saying is that, it was a lot for me to handle and I didn’t handle it in the best way possible,” he took a deep breath. “I know that we barely know each other besides both our shitty pasts and each other’s names. Shit, I don’t even know your last name. I figured you know mine since you came to spy on me or whatever.”
“It’s overwhelming, that’s for sure, when someone waltz into your life and make themselves known as your half-brother. I can’t say that we’re going to be best friends, but I’m willing to give you a shot of being my brother, whatever that entails.”
jamesoncastello:
In the past couple of weeks that Jaime had been figuring out how he fit into the world Wilmington presented him; and in doing so, if he could truly belong in that world anyway, he’d managed to somehow dust himself off from the setback and set about his normal path. At this point, loss was a habit, a process he knew inside and out, and it was a special sort of bond he shared with his own blood - but didn’t know it yet. Not the full extent. Aiden had loss littering his life in the form of abandonment, but Jaime had the loss repeated in his life as he watched his mother choose drugs over him, again and again.
By now, he felt almost rubbed raw, numb to the sensation of it. Being cast aside; unwanted, tainted, not worth choosing. It wasn’t like anyone picked the short kid with long hair for dodge-ball, so Jaime had learned how to matter in other, less conventional ways. Sometimes, even that didn’t feel like enough, and when he heard Aiden’s voice at the counter, he felt betrayed by his own heart. The way it jumped into his throat with hope, the fear of rejection once more. How could his own being, who fought so hard to live for so long, choose to allow his hopes to rise against with just the sound of his brother’s voice. The word felt forbidden.
“I’m here,” Jaime answered for himself, poking his head out of the doorway. In his hand, a tablet, a work still in progress. There was no client in his room at the time. His expression was guarded, but a glint of something else - wanting, maybe, a question in his apprehensive gaze. Was Aiden here to just make his point again, chase Jaime off? Another part of him still battled with the constant, bitter anger that felt just below the surface; was he good enough to be a tattoo artist, but not a brother? Not family? “Making an appointment, or?”
How the tables have turned that now Aiden was the one looking for his brother in town. Of course, he wasn’t a spy and it was pretty easy to find Jameson. To be honest, he wasn’t ready for another confrontation. One was more than enough for Aiden’s lifetime. He wasn’t exactly one to confront people and he didn’t see this as a confrontation. He saw it as an olive branch, a peace offering. He hoped that seeing his half-brother in the flesh once again would bring up different feelings rather than feelings of hurt and anger.
“No, I don’t do tattoos, I think you took all those genes,” he said, making a joke, hoping that this would lighten up the mood. “I just - I wanted to talk. Is there any way we could step outside or something?” Aiden walked outside, finding a bench and just sat down on it. He was hoping that this conversation wouldn’t be heard by all of Jameson’s coworkers. Having a deep conversation in public wasn’t Aiden’s forte, but there wasn’t many places he could go to.
“I - I apologize for how I reacted when you came to see me. Truth be told, I grew up a lone wolf. You already know the whole deal with my parents and stuff. I kind of never knew what it was like to have family up until I moved here. I guess it’s different, having a chosen family versus having a family you can’t pick. What I’m saying is that, it was a lot for me to handle and I didn’t handle it in the best way possible,” he took a deep breath. “I know that we barely know each other besides both our shitty pasts and each other’s names. Shit, I don’t even know your last name. I figured you know mine since you came to spy on me or whatever.”
“It’s overwhelming, that’s for sure, when someone waltz into your life and make themselves known as your half-brother. I can’t say that we’re going to be best friends, but I’m willing to give you a shot of being my brother, whatever that entails.”
jamesoncastello:
aidenjcarter
How the tables have turned that now Aiden was the one looking for his brother in town. Of course, he wasn’t a spy and it was pretty easy to find Jameson. To be honest, he wasn’t ready for another confrontation. One was more than enough for Aiden’s lifetime. He wasn’t exactly one to confront people and he didn’t see this as a confrontation. He saw it as an olive branch, a peace offering. He hoped that seeing his half-brother in the flesh once again would bring up different feelings rather than feelings of hurt and anger.
“No, I don’t do tattoos, I think you took all those genes,” he said, making a joke, hoping that this would lighten up the mood. “I just - I wanted to talk. Is there any way we could step outside or something?” Aiden walked outside, finding a bench and just sat down on it. He was hoping that this conversation wouldn’t be heard by all of Jameson’s coworkers. Having a deep conversation in public wasn’t Aiden’s forte, but there wasn’t many places he could go to.
“I - I apologize for how I reacted when you came to see me. Truth be told, I grew up a lone wolf. You already know the whole deal with my parents and stuff. I kind of never knew what it was like to have family up until I moved here. I guess it’s different, having a chosen family versus having a family you can’t pick. What I’m saying is that, it was a lot for me to handle and I didn’t handle it in the best way possible,” he took a deep breath. “I know that we barely know each other besides both our shitty pasts and each other’s names. Shit, I don’t even know your last name. I figured you know mine since you came to spy on me or whatever.”
“It’s overwhelming, that’s for sure, when someone waltz into your life and make themselves known as your half-brother. I can’t say that we’re going to be best friends, but I’m willing to give you a shot of being my brother, whatever that entails.”
Nodding, Jaime grabbed his jacket from just inside his studio room, and joined Aiden right outside the doors, settling down next to him on the bench. His heart raced in his ears, but he kept his expression and demeanor calm. Jaime was good at hiding things when he wanted to - that sting of rejection still burned hot, making him quick not to trust Aiden or that this could end well at all. Absently, he picked at a hangnail, watching his hands for a moment as he allowed Aiden to speak first… waiting.
“I wasn’t spying on you,” Jaime quickly defended, though he could sort of understand why Aiden would feel that way. After all, here he was, living and working right there in his town, complete with friends and even a few sexual escapades under his belt. He’d been careful to stay out of Aiden’s way, mostly, but still — it must be weird having your surprise half-brother suddenly sharing the same city as you. “Just didn’t wanna give up.”
Aiden, in a way, had just agreed to give their odd relation a chance, and Jaime was surprised by that. He’d seemed so against it, against him, that Jaime had all but given up hope. For so long, he’d just wanted someone like a brother. Somehow, he’d ended up with a few people, surprisingly enough, in his life that could almost be molded after family; but Aiden was the real deal. Jaime wasn’t even sure what to say, exactly. Definitely not ‘thanks’.
“I don’t get the whole family thing either,” He admitted finally, looking up from his hands and fiddling to give Aiden a very guarded look. Sure, Jaime appreciated the olive branch, but he wasn’t going to tear down every carefully placed wall just yet. “Shit, you probably freak me out more than I do to you,” He added, genuinely believing it. Aiden looked… so well-off. Nothing like Jaime, who felt his life barely hang on by threads usually, and his alternative appearance spoke for himself. “We’re obviously not the same, at all. Maybe we won’t even like each other. I just think it’s worth a shot though, like you said. Maybe being brothers.”
How could Aiden expect for Jameson to say that he didn’t spy on him. “Look, I’m not here trying to start an argument of whether or not you spied on me, but if you think about it, you came from wherever you’re from to come find me. I guess spying is a harsh word, but it really is just - odd for me. I told you before, I just thought that my biological family didn’t care about me and I failed to realize that you were a product of my biological family, that you were now a part of my bloodline whether I had a say in it or not,” he sighed, trying to backtrack and explain himself. “You have a lot more resilience than I do,” Aiden complimented the other.
Was Aiden still hurt by the whole situation? Of course he was, but at the same time, how could he selfishly give up the opportunity to know what it feels like to have a sibling. Of course, he had his group of friends who were his chosen family, but this, this was different. He would be able to hear about his biological mother whom he had no recollection of, hearing about who she was as a person despite all the things that she had put the brothers through. He was greatful that Jameson was giving him a chance - hearing him out.
“My idea of a family shattered when I was a kid and I finally reached a point where I got to pick my own family, but it still always felt like something was missing - that there was a void in my heart,” Aiden openly admitted. Aiden took a sip of his water, coating his throat considering how dry it’s been getting since he first started talking. “There is no way. You look like you could beat up a bunch of people and I’d be the person getting beat up,” Aiden tried to joke. Of course, this was based off his judgment of how Jameson looked. He knew barely anything about the other’s personality. “We’ve both been through a lot of hardships and unfortunately, that’s a thing that others might not be able to relate to,” he sighed. “Look - I don’t need to like you to love you, okay?”
