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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 26 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.6k

warnings: cursing, making out, some light touching, SO MUCH TEASING

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Chapter 26: Such A Tease

As you stood off to the side on set later that day watching the guys run through the choreography, you simply could not calm your racing heart. Your smile, the one that had been plastered on your face since the moment Tae left your room that morning, felt like a scarlet letter. It’s not that there was anything inherently wrong with grinning from ear to ear for hours at a time, but Tae had been sporting the same exact expression all day.

People had immediately noticed his change in demeanor and performance from the previous day. Son Sung Deuk had simply complimented him, noting how focused he seemed and how sharp his movements were, but the guys were less subtle in pointing out Tae’s altered state. While you were touching up his hair after they’d filmed the first couple scenes, Jungkook strolled over and straight up called him out.

“Alright, what are you on right now?” Jungkook asked jokingly. “Yesterday you were a mess, but today your dancing is better than Hobi-hyung’s.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Tae said, his smile somehow growing even larger.

“That. That right there,” the younger man said, pointing directly at Tae’s face. “Why are you so smiley today?”

“I just really love this song,” Tae said with a laugh.

Your heart skipped a beat at the potential double meaning of his words.

“And, I really love this green suit Y/N picked out for me,” he added cheekily a second later. “I don’t know what it is, but people always look extremely attractive in green.”

You bit back a laugh and hoped that Jungkook couldn’t see how much you were blushing right now. When he left a few minutes later, you gave Tae the sternness glare you could muster, which probably was not all that threatening, but all he gave you in return was a knowing smirk.

An hour or so later you were in one of the trailers organizing the outfits the guys would be wearing next when Tae walked in with a mischievous look on his face.

“Kim Taehyung, are you following me?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him questioningly.

“I most certainly am not,” he said in mock defense as he scanned the room and hastily picked up a hair dryer sitting on the table. “I came here for this hair dryer.”

“Your hair isn’t wet,” you said, trying to hold back a smile as you folded your arms over your chest and gave him a dubious look.

“Ahh, you’re right. It’s not,” he said as he set the hair dryer down. “I guess I don’t need it after all.”

“But, since I’m here anyway, I might as well give you this,” he then said with a smirk as he leaned over and gave you a kiss on the cheek.

“Tae!” you scolded, the big, silly grin you were now sporting making it obvious you were anything but angry. “You can’t do stuff like that.”

“Jagi, no one else is in here,” he replied calmly, giving you a shy smile.

“Well, you’re also being way too obvious out there,” you then added somewhat seriously.

“Obvious about what?” he asked innocently.

“Obvious about the fact that I woke up this morning with a beautiful woman in my arms? Or that I then got to make out with said beautiful woman?” he went on teasingly, wiggling his eyebrows at you in such a ridiculous way that you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Or,” he continued, suddenly sounding much more serious. “Is it too obvious that I am the happiest man in South Korea, perhaps even the entire world?”

As he said this, he took your hands. He brought each one up to his lips and placed a gentle kiss to your fingertips, just like he did that night on the roof.

“You make me so happy, Y/N,” he said, giving you his big, boxy grin. “I just can’t hide it.”

“You make me happy too, Tae,” you replied, smiling back at him with so much love in your heart you thought for sure it might explode.

“But, could you please just try to look slightly less ridiculously happy?” you asked with a laugh as you let go of his hands and turned back to the rack of clothes. “Maybe throw in a frown every once in a while?”

“I will try,” he replied seriously before his face broke out into another smile. “But, I cannot make any promises.”

You were about to then shoo him out so you could get some actual work done, when suddenly he spoke up again.

“Can I please just have one kiss before I go back out there?” he asked sweetly, giving you his puppy dog eyes. “It’s been like 6 whole hours since I last kissed you and that’s just too long.”

You looked over at him and, for perhaps the millionth time in your life, thought to yourself that he was entirely too charming for his own good.

“One kiss,” you said sternly.

You pulled him into a corner in the back of the trailer behind the clothing racks where you couldn’t be seen from the door or any of the windows. Gripping the vest of his green suit, you drew him in for what you thought would be one quick kiss. You were fooling yourself, though, for thinking that would be enough to satiate either of you. One kiss turned into two which then turned into three...

“I thought you said just one,” he pulled back to say with a smirk.

“You’re right, I did. We should sto-,” you started, but were cut off when Tae’s lips crashed back onto yours.

Before you knew it, he had an arm wrapped around your lower back holding you tightly to him, the other bracing against the wall behind you. His kisses were deep and passionate and you found yourself utterly lost in them as all rational thought left you. You should not be doing this with him right now, here on the set of a fucking BTS music video, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stop.

You were cursing yourself for dressing him in this green suit that made him sinfully irresistible when suddenly he broke the kiss. Instead of pulling away, though, he began trailing kisses down your jawline and onto your neck.

“I’ve always wanted to kiss you here,” he said a moment later before his lips latched onto the sensitive spot just below your ear.

“Fuck, Tae,” you breathed out, trying desperately to keep it together despite the fact that what he was doing felt so good. “D-Don’t leave marks.”

“I won’t, Jagi,” he assured you before pulling back to give you a wicked smile. “At least not where anyone else can see.”

You were on the verge of losing it, wondering where exactly on your body he planned on hiding his kisses, when suddenly you heard the sound of Namjoon’s voice calling out Tae’s name somewhere outside the trailer.

“Shit, I’ve got to go,” he said, immediately letting go of you. He gave you another quick peck, flashed you an adorable smile, and then sprinted out of the trailer.

Fucking Kim Taehyung and his duality

He would come in here acting all sweet and innocent, get you all worked up with his hot neck kisses, and then have to leave. After taking a few minutes to compose yourself, and finish organizing the clothes, you casually strolled out of the trailer, determined not to let anyone, especially Tae, know just how tightly you were wrapped around his finger.

~~~

Shooting didn't wrap up until almost 8:30 PM and the buses didn’t get back to the hotel until after 9:00 PM. On top of that, for reasons you would never understand, the guys were scheduled to do a VLive starting at 10:00 PM.

It had been a long day and you knew Tae was exhausted; he and the rest of the guys had literally been on the floor once the final scenes were filmed. You didn’t want to bother him, but you couldn’t deny that you wanted more than anything for him to stay with you again. It just felt so wonderful falling asleep and waking up in his arms. Unsure how to ask, or even broach the subject, you were in the process of rewriting a text to him for the umpteenth time when you received one from him.  

[Taehyung 9:23 PM] So I was thinking. We got to bed so late last night that I’m not sure I can count it as giving you a full night of cuddles. I think I might still owe you…

He wanted to stay with you again too

And, just like that you were that person smiling down at your phone like an idiot.

[9:24 PM] Hmm you’re right. According to my calculations, you definitely still owe me. Would you like to pay off your debt tonight?

[Taehyung 9:25 PM] Yes. Absolutely.

[Taehyung 9:26 PM] We still have this VLive at 10, though, so I might not be there until pretty late. I don’t want to keep you up. I know you must be tired. You worked so hard today.

You had worked really hard today. Mrs. Choi had made sure of that. The fact that he noted this, even though he and the rest of the guys clearly worked even harder, was just so sweet.

[9:28 PM] I don’t mind if it’s late. I could maybe give you one of my room keys? Just in case I fall asleep? That way you don’t have to wait in the hallway.

[Taehyung 9:29 PM] OK, that sounds good. I’ll stop by to get it in like 15 minutes.

[9:30 PM] OK 😊

With a sudden burst of diabolical inspiration about how to get back at Tae for his shenanigans in the trailer, you suddenly leapt to your feet and strode over to your suitcase. After rummaging around in it for a minute or so, you finally found what you were looking for: the black lace bra and panties you may or may not have bought specifically for this trip. You hastily put them on and then threw Tae’s hoodie on over top.

A few minutes later, you were eagerly watching through the peephole of your door, its many locks already undone. As soon as you saw him come into view, you yanked the door open and he quickly slipped inside. You closed the door and turned to find him staring at you, his gaze fixed on your barely covered legs.

He didn't say a word, he simply walked over to you, slowly backing you against the wall in the process. Cupping your cheeks, he brought his lips to yours for a slow, sensual kiss that had you almost forgetting your plan entirely. After a minute, he dropped his hands from your face and gently ran them down your sides.

“What are you wearing underneath this?” he asked softly as he toyed with the hem of his hoodie.

“I’ll let you find out for yourself,” you replied flirtatiously. “But, there’s a catch.”

“You can look or you can touch, but you cannot do both,” you went on, biting your lower lip seductively like you’d seen him do countless times before.

Without hesitating, he put his hands on the sides of your bare legs. After watching your reaction to make sure that was OK with you, he then slowly began running them upwards and underneath his hoodie. Higher and higher he went, well past the point where a pair of shorts would have sat, until finally his fingers brushed the delicate fabric.

“Fuck,” he breathed out.

“You seemed to really like my lace dress,” you whispered in his ear. “I thought you might like these too.”

For a moment he was still, utterly transfixed by the feeling of the thin, lacy band beneath his fingertips, but he soon began running his fingers back and forth along the fabric, his touch light and gentle and ever so slightly hesitant. When he slid his hands backward, his eyes went wide when he felt how cheeky the panties were, how little they actually covered and how they perfectly hugged the curve of your ass. When he then slipped his hands to the front and trailed his fingers over the little bow just below your navel, he swore again under his breath.

“Do you like them?” you asked innocently, now looking up at him with big doe eyes.

“I fucking love them,” he all but whispered.

“Do you wear things like this every day?” he then asked in a low, husky voice as he continued to play with the bow, gently pulling it and letting the band snap back softly against your skin.

“Only for special occasions,” you replied, trying to sound casual despite the fact that having his hands on you like this was driving you wild.

“Good,” he murmured, leaning his forehead against yours. “I’ll never be able to focus at work if I know you’re wearing these.”

“Well in that case, maybe I will start wearing them to the studio,” you then said coyly.

He pulled back to look at you and you saw something dark flash across his beautiful features.

“Now you’re just being a tease,” he said with a sternness that shot right through you.

“You’ve always been such a tease,” he went on. “Wearing those loose shirts that you know I can see down or that one skin-tight pair of dark jeans that make this look incredible.”

As he said that last part, he slid both hands backward again to palm your ass and give it a light squeeze. He then kept them there, his fingers slowly tracing the outline of the lace. If you didn’t already have a kink for his hands, you most certainly did now. You simply could not get over how fucking huge they were; he could literally cup your entire cheek in one hand.

“You knew I couldn’t have you, but you made me want you anyway,” he continued as he brought his hands back to your sides and then dipped his fingers beneath the lacy band. He then began trailing them back and forth along your hips, each time coming a little further forward, a little closer to where you most wanted them.

“You can have me now,” you whispered, now incredibly turned on and well aware of the fact that he was definitely the one teasing you.

“Unfortunately, I don’t think there’s time for that,” he said regretfully, giving you a devilish smirk before removing his hands from you entirely. “Our VLive starts in 5 minutes.”

You pouted at him, folding your arms across your chest.

“Don’t give me that face. You started this,” he teased before placing a light kiss on your pouty lips.

“But, I really do have to go now,” he then said seriously, looking genuinely disappointed, as he brought his hand up to gently caress your cheek. “I’ll see you later tonight, OK?”

“OK,” you replied as your pout morphed into a shy smile.    

He gave you another quick peck, took the spare key from you, and was about to open the door to leave when suddenly he turned back around. In the blink of an eye his lips were back on yours for a brief, but incredibly intense kiss.

“Just so you know, it’s not the lace, Jagi,” he said after releasing your lips. “It’s you in the lace.”

With that, he finally left your room, leaving you rooted to the spot, smiling like a fool, and blushing from head to toe.

~~~

It was almost midnight by the time he came to your room. You had been teetering on the edge of sleep for the last hour, trying desperately to stay awake so you could see him. The moment you heard the door unlock, though, you were wide awake. You heard him shuffle into the room, heard the unmistakable sound of him unzipping his jeans and removing his outer layers of clothing, and then heard him call out to you.

“Y/N?” Tae whispered.

“No, it’s Mrs. Choi,” you replied, biting back a laugh.

“Oh god, don’t even joke about that,” he said back as he climbed onto the bed.

“I might leave now just because you said that,” he went on, though, as he said this he was already slipping under the covers.

“You’re not going to leave,” you said smugly, turning to face him. “You want my cuddles.”

“I do want them,” he admitted with a laugh as he wrapped his arm around you and pulled you flush against him. “I need them, actually.”

He leaned in to kiss you then, but this kiss was much different than the urgent, hungry ones you’d shared that morning and throughout in the day. This kiss was slow and sweet, passionate too, but not as if it was meant to lead anywhere. It felt like he was kissing you simply for the sake of kissing you and being close to you, not because he wanted anything from you, which you appreciated so much.

It’s not that you didn't want to do more with him physically, because you definitely did, especially after all the teasing you two did today, but you didn’t want your entire relationship to be centered on that. It meant the world to you that he seemed to feel the same, that he came here tonight not with an agenda or expectations, but to truly just be with you.

“I loved waking up next to you this morning,” he said once you parted, sounding so sincere. “I wish you were the first thing I saw every day.”

If anyone else had said this, you would have worried it was some sort of practiced line, but this was Tae. You knew he wasn’t like that. He simply said whatever came to mind in the moment and what he was thinking right now were the most adorable, wonderful thoughts.

“You’re making me blush,” you said shyly as you hid your face in the crook of his neck. “You can’t see it because it’s dark, but I am.”

“I love making you blush,” he teased.

“I remember the first time I ever said you looked cute you turned the prettiest shade of pink,” he went on. As he spoke, you could just hear the smile in his voice.

“Stop,” you whined. “I’m going to die of embarrassment.”

“It would be my pleasure to revive you via mouth-to-mouth,” he said back smoothly.

You burst out laughing. “If the embarrassment doesn’t kill me, your cheesy pickup lines will.”

“Well then we should start planning your funeral now because they are only going to get cheesier,” he replied before he too started to laugh.

The two of you then spent the next hour talking and giggling and, yes, occasionally locking lips. You knew you should have gone to bed right away, the second day of the shoot was starting in just a couple hours, but you were far too excited to sleep. It just felt like you guys had too much to catch up on, too much lost time to start making up for, to waste a single moment on sleep.

As it neared 1:00 AM, and you were finally starting to get sleepy, it dawned on you that being here with him on a trip like this was actually such a tease. In the hotel you had relatively easy access to each other with your rooms being just a floor apart. Since Big Hit had actually gone ahead and rented out the entire hotel, you didn’t have to worry about being spotted by fans or the media or any other random people. You obviously had to be careful about being seen by other members of the BTS team, but they weren’t specifically watching Tae’s every move like many people would be outside the hotel. Even in the trailer, where you were literally on set with the entire rest of the team, you had been able to get some privacy.

Back in Seoul, once you returned to normal life, things would undoubtedly be different. You wouldn’t get any privacy at Big Hit; there would be no closed, locked doors to hide behind. You could still spend time together in the studio, but it would have to be in a strictly platonic capacity. If you wanted to actually see each other, you would have to go to each others’ apartments, which was easier said than done. Tae lived in a gated apartment complex that was under constant surveillance by security as well as by the media and sasaeng fans. You lived in a random apartment building that would be extremely difficult for him to visit without being followed or recognized.

You suddenly found yourself feeling rather anxious about everything, wondering what exactly you’d gotten yourself into and how you were supposed to make it all work.

“Tae,” you called out softly, almost nervously, after you’d flipped around to get ready to actually go to sleep. “What happens when we get home?”

“We figure it out together,” he said simply, seeming to know exactly what you were asking, as he gathered you in his arms and pulled you close.

“OK,” you replied, his quiet confidence already making you feel infinitely better.

“Goodnight, Tae,” you said a moment later.

“Goodnight, Jagi,” he replied, once again giving your shoulder a little kiss.

You took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and then closed your eyes.

You'll figure it out together

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 27 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 4.0k

warnings: cursing, heavy petting, mentions of character death

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Chapter 27: The Real World

Seventeen days.

It had been seventeen days since you had last been with Tae in any meaningful capacity. Seventeen days since you had last been alone with him. Seventeen days since he had last held you in his arms. Seventeen days since you had last felt his lips on yours.

It had been the longest seventeen days of your life.

Figuring things out back in the real world was infinitely harder than either of you imagined it would be. Over the course of just those three days at the Dynamite music video shoot, you two had managed to completely destroy the emotional dam you had spent the previous three years carefully constructing. Everything was now pouring out, and there was absolutely nothing you could do to stop it, but it was all just flowing into the abyss since you couldn’t actually be together.

Having to act normal and casual everyday at work like nothing between you two had changed was incredibly difficult and honestly painful. You wanted to openly comfort him when he was stressed or upset. You wanted to hold his hand or hug him when you were having a bad day. You wanted to give him a kiss hello when you first saw him every morning and kiss goodbye before you left for the night. In a million ways you wanted to be close to him and show him affection, but you couldn’t and it was absolutely killing you.

If you had been able to see him outside of work it would have made the façade you had to uphold at work more bearable, but you couldn’t even do that. With the single coming out in just a few weeks, the full album being released not long after, and a month-long promotional trip to America scheduled to kick off days after the album was released, the guys’ schedule was busier than ever. Every single day, including weekends, was jam-packed with dance practice, vocal coaching, performance rehearsals, interview filming, photoshoots, meetings to finalize album details and the promotional tour, and so much more.

Most nights, Tae wasn’t finishing up work until almost 8:00 or 9:00, but that wasn’t even the worst part. Immediately after filming for the Dynamite music video had wrapped up, the decision had been made that the guys would all be living back in the dorm for the time being. This was done partly to keep everyone focused during the final stretch of the comeback, but mostly to keep everyone on the same schedule and make travel more convenient. Even Namjoon, who was married, and Jin, who was engaged, were staying there most nights of the week. Jimin and Hobi got to leave once a week to stay with their girlfriends, but since Tae obviously couldn’t tell anyone you two were together, he had no legitimate excuse to stay back at his own apartment.

You two texted all the time, and he called or Facetimed you whenever he could without being overheard by one of the guys, but it just wasn’t enough. You found yourself missing him constantly, longing for him in a way you never had before. You missed him even when he was right in front of you at work because, even though he was so close, he still felt so far away. You always missed him most at night, though, a feeling which you knew went both ways.

[Taehyung 2:14 AM] I miss you so much, Jagi.

[Taehyung 2:14 AM] I can’t sleep without you.

[Taehyung 2:15 AM] I just want to hold you again and wake up beside you.

You had woken up to those text messages one morning and immediately felt a literal pain in your chest because you felt the exact same way. Even though he had only stayed with you twice, you found yourself feeling unimaginably lonely each night without his arms around you.

You just wanted to be with him. To spend time with him as a couple, however unofficial that title was. To talk to him without having to filter and censor everything you said. To love hearing him call you Jagi, not worry constantly about that word slipping out of his mouth around someone else. To watch a movie or cook dinner or stay in your pajamas all day together. To laugh and be playful and flirty without someone yelling at you to stop. To cuddle and kiss and be intimate.

The abundance of physical contact you’d gotten during those three days, and subsequent absence of it these last two plus weeks, had left you desperately craving him, absolutely starving for his touch. You had obviously always found Tae insanely attractive, had always desired to be with him, but previously that had only been in a theoretical, abstract sense. Now, though, the concept of being with him was real, never more so than the second day of filming for the Dynamite music video, the last time the two of you had been truly alone together.

The morning had begun innocently; you had woken up first in his warm embrace and then proceeded to pepper his face with tiny kisses until his lips curled up into a shy smile and his eyes opened a few moments later. Shortly after that, you began sharing slow, tender morning kisses, ones that made you completely forget that a world existed outside of the bed you were sharing. However, when you casually mentioned that the lace panties from the day before came with a matching bra he unfortunately didn’t discover, the situation escalated quickly. The kisses became more passionate, his hands began wandering underneath your tank top, and the next thing you knew, you were on top of him, straddling his hips.

From that new position you could easily kiss his deliciously thick neck, something you had literally dreamed of doing for years. You began just below his ear, smiling to yourself when he cursed over how good it felt to be kissed there, and then worked your way down to his broad chest. As you covered his body with kisses, you began rolling your hips, subtly at first, but more purposefully once you saw, heard, and felt just how much he loved it. He brought his hands to your hips to help guide you back and forth over himself, but you were clearly in charge, slowing down and speeding up at will just to relish in how needy he grew beneath you.

It was all fun and games teasing him like that until he suddenly used those big muscles of his to flip your positions, the overt display of dominance being something you found incredibly sexy. Now on top and in control, it took him no time at all to discover how sensitive you were, the small gasp you let out when he applied just a bit of pressure with his hips bringing a smirk to his lips. You knew you were in trouble when he shifted slightly and brought his thigh between your legs. As he began slowly grinding into you, he hungrily swallowed the string of curses and small whimpers that left your lips.

Were it not for your ‘15 minutes until bus departure’ warning alarm going off a minute later, you’ve no doubt he would have soon had you coming undone. So enthralled with the way your body was responding to him, he didn’t even hear the beeping at first. He simply kept going, kept on whispering sweet nothings and praises into your ear as he slowly rocked his hips. You had half a mind to ignore the alarm and your responsibilities entirely and let him continue, that’s how good he was making you feel. However, you used all your willpower to gently push him off of you, telling him if you two didn’t stop now, you were literally never going to be able to leave the bed.

Had you known that the passionate kiss you shared just before he left your room was the last one you were going to get for a while, you would have made it last a little longer, would have savored it just a bit more.

~~~

Today, the seventeenth day since you’d last been with Tae, was significant for two reasons.

First, it was the day of the new album’s concept photoshoot. A shoot like this was always important, but this one was especially so because Tae was serving as the Visual Director. Taking on this role was a huge opportunity for him to showcase his many other artistic skills outside of singing, dancing, and performing. You were so proud of all the hard work he had put into planning everything and knew how nervous he was for the photoshoot to go smoothly. Even if you couldn’t show your support the way you wanted to, you were still determined to be there for him throughout the day, which is partly why you didn’t tell him the other reason why today was significant: that it was the five year anniversary of your mother’s death.

You had been thinking about her a lot lately, mostly wishing you could talk to her about what was happening with Tae. You wanted her advice and guidance, her assurance that you following your heart right now wasn’t the biggest mistake of your life. If anyone could have helped you navigate through the challenges you were facing now, and would surely face in the future, it would have been her.

In previous years, you had taken this day off to be with your dad and your sisters. You would visit her grave together and then relax at home cooking her favorite dinner and watching her favorite movies. But this year, with it falling on the exact same day as a major photoshoot, you just couldn’t swing it. You honestly hadn’t even tried to ask Mrs. Choi about taking the day off; you knew all she would have done was make you feel guilty and question your commitment. Your family had understood, though, and the four of you had made plans to remember her together over the weekend.

When you told Tae the story about your mom, you had mentioned she passed in late summer, but never told him the specific day. Over the last few weeks you had gone back and forth about whether or not to tell him today was that day, but had ultimately decided it would be best not to. You didn’t want him to feel guilty that you had to be working when you would have otherwise been with your family and also didn’t want to stress him more on his big day. More than that, though, you were afraid of how he would act if he knew. You worried that he would be unable to stay on his side of the invisible line you two drew between yourselves at work, that he would be too affectionate and protective and would inadvertently give you two away.

The day had started off OK. The shoot was taking place not far from Big Hit at an indoor studio where the set had been constructed. Being somewhere new was a welcome distraction and it was busy enough throughout the morning that your mind stayed relatively occupied. Tae still realized something was off right away which shouldn’t have been a surprise. He eyed you curiously the whole time you were doing his hair and makeup and asked no less than fifty times some variation of ‘Are you OK?’. You just smiled back at him, though, and assured him you were fine, just a little tired perhaps, which you hoped he believed.

However, as the day went on, it became harder and harder to focus and keep it together. Your mind began drifting elsewhere, to thoughts of your mom both before and after she got sick, to the dark days that followed her passing, to all the questions you wished you could ask her right now. At one point, after you had looked up to find Tae looking at you from across the room, a slightly concerned expression on his face, the thought that she would never get to meet him crossed your mind and you got momentarily choked up; she would have loved him.

Eventually, it all became a bit too overwhelming so you stepped off to the side of the set and pulled out your phone. Hoping to take your mind off things with some mindless social media scrolling, you opened up Instagram, but the first photo you saw stopped your heart. It was you and your sisters and your mom, smiling together at the beach, your dad’s shadow as he held the camera just barely in the frame. Your younger sister had posted it earlier that day along with what you were sure was an incredibly heartfelt message that you absolutely did not have the stomach to read right now.

It was one of your absolute favorite photos, a memory from a truly wonderful day before everything changed, but it was not something you were prepared to see just now. At once, you felt the all too familiar closing of your throat and stinging behind your eyes, telltale signs that you might start sobbing at any moment, but you forced yourself to shove your feelings down. Now was not the time to have a complete and utter breakdown.

Stopping by the lunch table to grab a coffee, the caffeinated beverage ironically always helped you relax, you headed back to the prep room to try and calm down. As you turned into the room, you saw none other than Tae standing at one of the mirrors. He was fiddling with one of his earrings, happily humming one of the songs from the upcoming album, but when his gaze met yours through the reflection his smile immediately faded. In an instant, he was crossing the room to you, worry etched all over his features.

“Jagi,” he whispered as he leaned in close. “Please talk to me.”

Just hearing his voice and having him near was almost enough to break the dam. You wanted nothing more than to be in his embrace right now, to hear all the sweet words of comfort you know he would give to you.

“Please tell me what’s wrong,” he pleaded when you didn't respond.

“I’m fine, Tae,” you said back, your lower lip trembling.

“No you’re not,” he said, sounding so distraught. “Something is wrong. Something has been wrong all day.”

“Did I do something to upset you?” he then questioned fearfully.

You shook your head at him, silently willing him to stop asking questions before you completely lost it.

“Do you not feel well?” he then asked, sounding more worried than ever. “Did someone say or do something to hurt you?”

“Tae, I’m fine,” you replied. You tried to say it calmly, but when your voice broke on the word ‘fine’, Tae’s eyes went wide in alarm.

He instinctively reached out to put his arms around you, but your hands immediately shot up to stop him, the coffee cup flying out of your grasp in the process. It fell directly onto Tae’s white shirt and then crashed to the floor. Looking first to the complete mess on the ground and then to the massive stain on his shirt, your composure finally cracked.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” you said as tears welled up in your eyes. “I ruined your shirt and you haven’t finished shooting yet.”

“Jagi, it’s OK. It's just a shirt. Really, it’s not impor-,” Tae started before being cut off by Mrs. Choi’s shrill voice.

“Y/N, what have you done?” she asked venomously, coming from somewhere in the room where you didn’t realize she had been standing.

You looked up at her, saw her angry, disgusted expression, and immediately shrunk into yourself. If it was any other day you could have handled her, could have brushed off her attack, but not today.

“You’ve ruined an outfit that cost thousands of dollars and jeopardized the whole photoshoot,” she then said snidely, answering her own question. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“I’m sorry,” was all you could manage, your voice barely above a whisper.

“You have been distracted and careless all day long,” she continued as she stared daggers into you.

“I’m not even surprised something like this happened, though,” she went on, throwing her hands up in exasperation. “You are always distracted and careless. You never focus or take your work seriously. Honestly, you are a complete disgrace to this-”

“Enough!” Tae suddenly said, cutting her off sharply as he turned to face her.

Mrs. Choi blanched, having never heard Tae use such a tone with her or anyone else for that matter.

“For the last three years you have been dismissive, overly critical, and downright rude to Y/N and I will not tolerate it anymore,” he said heatedly. “You may be the stylist’s manager, but she is my stylist and I will not let you speak to her this way.”

“Your constant beratement is not only unprofessional, but completely unfounded. The quality of her work is excellent; she is talented and hardworking and extremely dedicated to our team,” he continued as he shifted in front of you slightly, shielding you from her.

“Just look at what she did with the Dynamite music video. Everyone was so impressed with her concept idea, and saw how hard she worked, but you never once complimented her or appreciated her efforts. All you did was criticize her and belittle her and make her doubt herself,” he then added angrily.

For a moment it looked like Mrs. Choi was going to say something in reply, but before she could get a word out Tae continued.

“What happened just now was an accident that I clearly caused,” he said, gesturing to the mess on the floor. “If you would have taken two seconds to stop yelling at her and talk to us you would have realized that.”

“But, more importantly, if you had been paying attention at all today to the stylists you’re supposed to be managing you would have realized hours ago that she has been extremely upset about something all day and is genuinely not OK right now,” he finally said, now looking incredibly distressed himself.

You stood there in stunned silence, tears still threatening to fall, as your gaze flickered back and forth between Tae and Mrs. Choi. His chest was heaving from the exertion of his outburst while she was motionless, a look of complete shock on her face. Upon remembering you were still here, though, she turned to you with an unmistakably guilty expression on her face.

“Y/N,” Mrs. Choi began apprehensively. “Is something wrong?”

You hesitated for a moment before answering, unsure how to respond, but eventually decided to just go with the truth.

“Today is the five year anniversary of my mother’s death,” you said quietly, wiping away a few tears from your cheeks with the backs of your hands.

Knowing how devastated he would be to learn this, you purposefully didn’t look at Tae as you spoke, but the audible gasp he let out was more than enough to shatter your heart.

“Normally I take this day off, but I knew how important the photoshoot was so I didn’t want to let everyone down,” you went on. “But, clearly I’ve done that anyway.”

It was quiet for a few moments as your admission washed over them and, surprisingly, it was Mrs. Choi who then broke the silence.

“Y/N, I am very sorry for your loss,” she said with a tenderness you did not know she was capable of possessing, much less directing at you. “I am also sorry that you have been dealing with your grief while working today. I am sure that must have been very difficult.”

“I am sorry too for overeating today,” she then said before adding tentatively, “and for perhaps being a bit too hard on you over the years.”

Completely taken aback by not only her apology, but the genuine sincerity with which she delivered it, you simply stood there and stared at her.

“I think we should talk sometime about the things Taehyung mentioned,” she went on. “But, I don’t believe now is the appropriate time.”

“Taehyung, why don’t you take Y/N out for a short break?” she then suggested. “Take her somewhere private where she can have a minute to collect herself.”

He nodded at her and then silently led you from the room, his hand resting on the top of your back comfortingly. Down the hall you two went until he stopped in front of a door into what appeared to be some sort of guest lounge. He opened it and ushered you inside.

The moment the door closed, he had you in his arms. He sat you two down on the couch and then gently pulled you onto his lap, his arms cradling you in a tight embrace. You buried your face in his neck and sobbed, letting out all the emotion you’d been keeping hidden. He stroked your back soothingly and gently rocked you as he whispered the sweetest words of comfort.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked a little while later once you had calmed down, the hurt in his voice evident.

“I didn’t want you to worry or feel guilty,” you said quietly.

He didn’t respond to that at first, just hugged you to him more tightly.

“Jagi, how am I supposed to take care of you if you don’t tell me things like this?” he then questioned, sounding so devastated.

“I’m sorry,” was all you said in reply.

“It’s OK,” he said back, his voice thick with emotion. “Just, next time please let me be there for you.”

You nodded your head in reply and just burrowed deeper into his chest.

A comfortable silence then fell between the two of you. As you sat there, curled up on his lap like that, absentmindedly playing with the buttons on his robe, it dawned on you that this was the first time you had been legitimately alone with him in weeks. You lifted your head up to look at him and could tell from his expression that he must have just had the same realization. Bringing a hand up to cup your cheek, he brushed away a tear with his thumb and then leaned in to connect your lips for the tenderest of kisses.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he said softly once you parted, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear as he spoke.

“I know I see you every day, but it’s just not the same,” he continued before drawing you in for another kiss, this one just as slow and sweet as the first.

“I've missed you too, Tae,” you said after breaking away again, your voice catching just a bit. “So much that it hurts.”

“I know, Jagi,” he said sadly, leaning his forehead against yours. “I can’t stand being away from you.”

“But, I promise I’ll find a way for us to be together soon,” he then said, dropping his hand from your cheek and wrapping it around your waist to pull you closer to him.

He kissed you again, this time more deeply, and you wound your arms around his neck in response. As you began running your fingers through his hair, his kisses grew more desperate, like he was afraid if he detached his lips from yours for even just one second you would disappear and he would never get to kiss you again. You matched his passion immediately; you wanted nothing more than to drown in his kisses, to drown in him.

The indescribably perfect feeling of his lips on yours had you wondering how you had gone the last seventeen days without it, much less the last three years. Being with him like this just felt so good, so right; there was literally nowhere else in the world you would rather be. You were completely lost in him, and in the moment, so lost that the overwhelming sadness of this day felt a little more bearable, so lost that you forgot about the photoshoot and his ruined shirt and Mrs. Choi, so lost, unfortunately, that you didn’t hear the door open.

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Too Goo To Be True - Ch. 28 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.3k

warnings: cursing

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Chapter 28: Dinner Before Dessert - Part 1

“Taehyung! Are you in- OH SHIT,” said the unmistakable voice of Park Jimin.

You and Tae immediately broke apart, and your next instinct was to scramble off of his lap, but he surprisingly didn’t move to get you off of him. He just kept holding you, his arms actually tightening around you protectively.

“Fuck. Thank god it’s just you, Jimin,” Tae said in relief as he turned towards the older man. “Come in and close the door.”

Jimin did just that, immediately locking it once he was inside, something you and Tae clearly should have done before you decided to start making out. Nervously, you followed Tae’s gaze to where Jimin was standing. At first, his angelic features were sculpted into a look of complete shock, but as his eyes traveled back and forth over you two, clearly noting the way Tae tenderly held you in his arms, a small grin spread across his face.

“This...this explains a lot,” he said slowly before letting out a little laugh.

Immediately, you relaxed, letting out the breath you didn’t even realize you had been holding. Jimin wasn’t mad and didn’t look like he was about to go telling everyone. Honestly, he didn’t even seem that surprised anymore by what he was seeing which made a lot of sense once you thought about it more. He was Tae’s soulmate, after all. Turning back to Tae, you found him already looking at you, a shy smile on his face.

“I hadn’t told him yet about this,” he said, gesturing between the two of you. “But, I have told him some other stuff before.”

It was adorable how bashfully he had said that, how much he was blushing right now. Knowing that he had talked to Jimin about his feelings for you made you giddy. It’s not that you hadn’t believed everything Tae had told you, how long he wanted to be with you and how much he cared about you, because you absolutely did, but him telling Jimin did make everything feel that much more real.

“You didn’t tell me, but I knew something was up,” Jimin chimed in with a smirk. “You’ve been all happy and smiley for weeks now.”

“You’ve also been attached to your phone, though, texting constantly and sneaking off for private conversations,” he continued, now sounding much more serious. “And, I’m not the only one who has noticed.”

When he said that, Tae immediately tensed up and finally did gently lift you off of his lap.

“Namjoon-hyung asked me point blank if you were seeing someone,” Jimin then said with a grimace.

“You told him I’m not, right?” Tae immediately asked, getting to his feet.

“Of course,” Jimin replied. “I mean, I had some suspicions, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.”

“Good,” Tae said, sounding so relieved. “He and the rest of the guys can't know.”

"No one can know, Jimin,” he then added solemnly.

You couldn’t deny that it stung just a bit to hear him say those words, how easily that ‘I’m not’ rolled off his tongue, how adamant he was that no one knew. The obvious reason why he didn’t want anyone to know was because of your contract and the fact that you would be immediately fired if the wrong person ever found out you were romantically involved with him. Reminding yourself that he was only trying to protect you and your relationship, you actively worked to keep out the little doubts and worries trying to crawl into your mind, the ones that said Tae was ashamed to be with you and that your relationship actually wasn’t that serious to him.

“I understand,” Jimin replied earnestly, nodding as he spoke. “I promise I won’t tell anyone.”

“We can talk more later about everything,” he added. “Shooting starts again in 15 minutes, though. That’s why I came to find you in the first place.”

“Wow, I didn’t realize we’ve been gone that long,” Tae said sheepishly, his face flushing.

You felt your own cheeks heat up as you realized the two of you had been in here making out much longer than you realized.

“Time flies when you’re having fun,” Jimin replied, giving the two of you a wolfish grin before slipping back out into the hallway, leaving the two of you smiling and giggling like lovestruck teenagers.

~~~

Jimin walking in on you two ending up being a blessing in disguise. That Saturday, at the guys’ next group meeting, he secretly advocated on behalf of Tae for letting people stay back at their own apartments more often, claiming everyone needed a break from each other and that his girlfriend’s needs were not being met. The guys laughed at his cheekiness, but agreed that it might be best to have some time apart. It was decided that, after the single was released the following Friday, everyone could stay back at their own apartments before they left for America two weeks later.

Tae had texted you this news immediately after the meeting. You could tell he was excited, but also that he was trying to contain that excitement out of respect for that fact that you were with your family to remember your mom. He had been incredibly supportive while you were away, sending you sweet, comforting messages every now and then, but still giving you space. He was being so wonderful that you had almost told your sisters about your relationship, but at the last second decided not to. Given the nature of the trip, and the somber mood everyone was in, it just didn’t feel like the appropriate time to share such happy news.

After getting home late Sunday evening, you texted Tae to let him know you made it back safely and he called you less than a minute later. You picked up, but before you could even say hello he started talking.

“Do you have plans for next Saturday night?” he asked excitedly.

“That depends,” you replied. “Does binge watching Netflix alone in my apartment count as plans?”

“No. No it does not,” he said back with a snicker.

“Then no, I do not have plans,” you said dryly.

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?” he then asked, sounding adorably nervous.

“I would love to,” you answered as a big, silly grin spread across your face. “What did you have in mind?”

“I’m going to make you dinner,” he announced proudly.

“Tae, you don’t know how to cook,” you said with a laugh.

“I know,” he said. “But for you I will learn.”

“I want this to be a real date,” he went on. “On our first one you didn’t realize it was a date until after it was over and on our second one you were...slightly inebriated.”

“I was totally wasted,” you deadpanned.

“OK. I was trying to say it nicely, but yes, you were totally wasted,” he said with a laugh.

“I want this date to be special,” he then said, sounding so sincere it made your heart flutter.

“How should I dress for this special date?” you then asked, your smile growing impossibly wide.

“You will look beautiful in anything, but pretend as if you’re going to a fancy restaurant,” he replied smoothly.

“Hmm Ok,” you said coyly. “I think I know just what to wear.”

~~

It was 5:00 PM the following Saturday and you were walking down the hall of Tae’s apartment building towards his door, your phone in one hand and an overnight bag in the other. When he invited you over for your date he hadn’t specifically asked you to stay the night so you spent all week wondering if he wanted you to and worrying that maybe he didn’t. However, earlier in the day he had texted you asking what you wanted for breakfast tomorrow which made you realize that he hadn’t even thought twice about you staying over, it was just a given to him.

Getting into the apartment complex and then into the building itself had been rather stressful. You had to be buzzed in at the gate and then had to check in at the front desk by showing the security guard your ID so he could match your name to the one Tae provided. It made you incredibly nervous to know there would be legitimate evidence that you’d visited him, but he promised you the visitor’s logs were confidential. He did ask that you cover your face with a mask and wear a hat, though, which also made you anxious.

Coming to see him honestly felt like a scandal waiting to happen, there were so many things that could go wrong and you both had so much to lose, but the idea of not coming when you finally had the opportunity to spend time together was just crazy. Aside from your brief rendezvous at the photoshoot, you had been a part almost a month and that was simply too long. You missed him terribly, longed for him constantly, and would have gone to the moon and back if it meant you got to be with him.

Just as you reached his door you raised your hand to knock, but before you even made contact it swung open. There stood Tae, looking handsome as ever in dark slacks and a light blue button-up, an impossibly large grin on his face. In an instant he had pulled you into his apartment, closed the door, and wrapped you in a hug. You immediately melted into him, having forgotten just how good it felt to have his arms around you, how safe you felt when he held you tightly to his chest. The best way to describe it was that it felt like home. Tae felt like home.

After standing there like that for a minute or so, you finally let go of each other and you removed your mask and hat. He then leaned in to give you a kiss, but instead of kissing you on the lips, he only kissed you on the cheek. Confused, and quite disappointed not to have his plush lips on yours, you gave him a questioning look.

“I told you this was going to be a real date,” he said as he took a couple steps backwards.

“And on a real date you have dinner before you have dessert,” he then added with a smirk.

You stared at him, simultaneously loving and hating him: loving him because it was so sweet that he wanted to make tonight special and not just about being physical, but hating him because he looked like a hot, powerful CEO right now and you wanted nothing more than to devour him, especially after that last comment. He was teasing you, dressing like that and then making you wait to kiss him, but you had come prepared for him and his tricks.

“Are you sure you don’t want to have dessert before dinner,” you asked seductively as you slipped off your jacket to reveal the green lace dress.

The way his eyes first grew wide and then darkened as he looked you up and down had you flushing all over. After spending a few moments staring at you, clearly wrestling with himself on what to do, he came back over and placed his hands on your hips. As his fingers brushed back and forth across the lacy fabric, his gaze again wandered over you before he looked up into your eyes.

“Maybe just one bite,” he finally said as his tongue darted out to wet his lips.

He leaned in to kiss you, but at the last second you pulled back.

“On second thought, I think it’s best if we don’t spoil our appetites,” you said, giving him a wicked grin.

Obviously displeased to have been given a taste of his own medicine, he pouted at you like a child that had just been told to eat their vegetables. It was adorable and hysterical, but before you could comment on it the sound of excited barking suddenly filled the room. From out of nowhere, Tannie came bounding down the hall, stopped right at your feet, and then looked up at you with his adorably angry little eyes.

“Tannie!” you exclaimed as you kneeled to pet him. He was jumping up and down so excitedly that you gathered him up in your arms and started cuddling him.

“You're such a good boy. Yes you are,” you cooed as he began smothering your face with tiny licks. “I’ve missed you, Tannie. Yes I did.”

“Alright, that’s enough, Tannie,” Tae eventually said with another pout as he extracted the dog from your arms and set him down. “She came here for me, you know.”

“I did?” you questioned playfully, giving him a sly sideways glance.

“You did,” he confirmed smoothly. “You came here for my cooking and my cuddles and my kisses.”

You bit your lip shyly, no doubt blushing wildly. He was right, absolutely right.

“Come on, Jagi,” he said with a smile as he took your hand. “Let me give you the tour and then we’ll eat.”

His apartment was, unsurprisingly, both large and luxurious. The décor was so Tae: artsy, minimalist, each room covered in mostly neutral tones but containing some sort of vibrant, eye-catching statement piece. Everything looked so elegant and tasteful, but also so unmistakably expensive. You didn’t often think about the massive difference in wealth between you two since he was not one to flaunt how well-off he was, but it was hard not to think about it now.

He was literally a millionaire and acknowledging that fact suddenly had you feeling a bit anxious. If and when your relationship ever did get out, you knew with absolute certainty that you, a lowly stylist still paying off college loans, would be accused of being with him for his money as well as his fame. The thought made your stomach churn, but you pushed it from your mind and focused back on Tae and the special evening he’d planned for you.

Eventually, he took you to the dining room where you saw he had put together an incredibly romantic dinner. The table arrangement honestly looked like something you would see at a five star restaurant. It was truly exquisite, but the best part wasn’t the flowers or the candles or the fancy bottle of red wine, it was the fact that he had done it all himself and done it for you. Standing there in the doorway, you were momentarily speechless and honestly a tiny bit choked up knowing just how much effort he had put into everything. You leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek as a thank you and absolutely melted at the shy smile he gave you in return.

He held your hand all throughout dinner, having made sure that he sat on your left since you were right handed and he was ambidextrous. Although it was ever so slightly difficult to eat with one hand, you happily endured the hassle: you absolutely loved the feeling of his hand in yours. Conversation flowed easily between you two, as did laughter. With no one else around to watch or judge or tell you to settle down, the two of you unleashed your full rowdiness. Everything was funny, even the things that weren’t funny, and you had to stop every few minutes to catch your breath and regain your composure. You were so grateful that this aspect of your relationship hadn’t changed since you’d started ‘dating’. After all, you had been howling with laughter when you first realized you were in love with him three years ago.

When you finished your meal he got up, went to the kitchen, and returned a minute later with a tray full of dark chocolate covered strawberries. Your heart swelled knowing he had specifically gotten your favorite dessert, but almost burst out of your chest when you realized he hadn’t bought them, he had made them. As you sat there, peeling the chocolate off of one like you always did, swooning at the way he was eating with his lips adorably pouted, you felt more certain than ever before that what you two were doing right now was worth the risk, that he was worth the risk.

A little while later you two were in his kitchen, having just finished cleaning up from dinner. You had tried to help put things away, but he immediately scolded you, saying your only job tonight was to relax and enjoy yourself. You were sitting on the counter watching him put the leftover dark chocolate covered strawberries into a Tupperware when it suddenly occurred to you that dinner was over and it was time for the real dessert of the evening.

“You know,” you began in a sultry voice. “I had a dream once that you were a strawberry farmer. A sexy strawberry farmer, to be exact.”

“Is that so?” he asked with a grin, turning to face you.

“It is,” you said coyly.

“It was right after the Map Of The Soul ON:E concert,” you then went on. “When you wore those overalls for your ‘Inner Child’ performance.”

“Ahh, yes,” he said, recalling the memory fondly. “I suppose I could have been mistaken for a farmer while wearing those.”

“If you remember, you were wearing them without the blazer while I did your hair and makeup,” you reminded him, leaning back on your hands and noting the way his eyes followed the skirt of your dress as it slid up your thighs.

“You were very fidgety that day,” you continued. “You kept stretching your arms and leaning back with them behind your head and running your hands through your hair.”

“I couldn’t help but wonder if you knew that doing all those things while wearing those overalls would show off those big muscles of yours,” you then added, eyeing him curiously as you spoke.

The mischievous smirk he now wore told you your suspicions were absolutely correct: he had been purposefully flexing for you that day.

“Kim Taehyung,” you scolded teasingly. “It’s not very gentlemanly to try to seduce a lady at her place of work.”

“What if the lady wanted to be seduced?” he asked provocatively as he came to stand in front of you, leaning against the counter and caging you with his arms. “What if I could just tell that she liked what she was seeing?”

You did like what you saw that day. Loved it, actually. It wasn’t often that he wore sleeveless tops that showed his biceps and shoulders, let alone ones that also left his sturdy chest and broad back on full display. You had tried so hard not to stare, but apparently you hadn’t tried hard enough.

“You could just tell?” you asked, well aware that you were definitely blushing right now.

“I could,” he said smugly as he gently spread your legs apart with his hands and stepped between them. “Just from the way she was looking at me.”

“And what way was that?” you questioned slowly, your heart rate rising with him so close and his hands on your bare legs.

He paused for a moment before answering, his eyes fixed on you in smoldering stare.

“Hungrily, lustfully, like she might be having some very unprofessional thoughts,” he then said smoothly before adding in a low voice. “The way I’m looking at you right now.”

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To Good To Be True - Ch. 29 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.9k

warnings: cursing, fingering, handjob

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Chapter 29: Dinner Before Dessert - Part 2

Before you even knew what was happening, he was capturing your lips in a ravenous kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck and he slid his around your waist, the two of you molding into one another seamlessly. For the next few minutes, not a single word was spoken as you simply devoured each other, your hunger insatiable after holding back all evening. It was desperate and messy, all tongue and teeth, but you simply could not get enough.

“I have unprofessional thoughts every time I see you in this dress,” he said breathlessly after finally releasing your lips. “Every time I think about you in this dress.”

“You think about me in this dress?” you asked flirtatiously.

“I do,” he replied at once. “And about you in my hoodie and those lace panties.”

“I always think about you, Jagi,” he then added almost guiltily as he leaned his forehead against yours. “I-I just can’t help myself.”

You knew at once what he was admitting to and found it to be possibly the most arousing thing you’d ever heard in your life. The idea that Kim Taehyung, literally the sexiest man on the planet, fantasized about you was such a deliciously scandalous thought.

“I think about you too, Tae,” you said as you cupped his cheeks and kissed him deeply.

“You do?” he asked in amazement.

“Mmhmm,” you hummed in response as you then began trailing kisses down his neck.

“Fuck, that’s so hot” he murmured as he pulled you forward on the counter and pressed his hips into you. “Tell me what you think about.”

You’d had so many fantasies of him over the years it was hard to know where to start. One thing you did know, though, was that nothing you’d ever imagined held a candle to what you were experiencing with him right now. His every touch sent a jolt of electricity through you, every word spoken in his deep, husky voice had your mind hazy with desire.

“I think about you flexing these muscles for me,” you began as you trailed your fingers up his arms and then down his chest. “And about how strong you are and how easily you can pick me up and take me wherever you want.”

“I think about how sexy you look when you’re performing on stage,” you went on. “Especially during those body rolls at the end of Mic Drop or that hip thrust during Dimple.”

“But, mostly I think about your big hands and your long fingers and all the things you could do with them,” you whispered in his ear.

You wrapped your legs around his back as you spoke, pulling him deeper into you, and could instantly tell how affected he was by the risqué things you’d just said. The feel of him between your legs, nothing but a few pieces of fabric separating you, had your entire body buzzing; you had never been more turned on in your entire life. You crashed your mouth back onto his and poured all of your desire into the sensual kiss you shared. He began running his hands up your thighs, pushing the skirt of your dress upwards as he went, but he stopped partway up and leaned his forehead against yours again.

“Can I touch you, Jagi?” he asked hesitantly as his thumbs rubbed little circles on your inner thighs, all hints of teasing and suggestiveness suddenly gone from his voice. “The way you just talked about?”

You were taken aback by his sudden change in demeanor, but your answer came without hesitation.

“Yes,” you replied quietly before giving him a kiss on the cheek.

You were so appreciative of him asking for permission before things went any further. You had clearly alluded to your desire to be intimate with him like that, but you hadn’t explicitly told him you were ready for it now. It meant so much to you that, even though you had teased each other and fooled around a bit before, he hadn’t made an assumption about what you might be comfortable with now, that this kind of intimacy was something he took seriously and wanted to talk about first.

“Can I touch you?” you then asked back as you gently ran your fingers through his hair.

“Yes, Jagi,” he replied before mimicking you and kissing your cheek.

“I still want to go slow, though,” he then said, bringing his head up to look at you, a tender expression on his face. “I don’t want to rush everything tonight.”

“But, I want to be with you,” he added softly. “I want to be close to you and make you feel good and take care of you.”

You didn’t think it was possible to love him anymore than you already did, but knowing that this was how he felt about intimacy, how meaningful it was to him, a whole new kind of love for him bloomed uncontrollably in your chest.

“I want to be with you too,” you said with a shy smile before leaning in to give him a slow, sweet kiss.

Without another word, he lifted you up off the counter and carried you to his bedroom where he then gently laid you down on his bed. Laying down beside you, he took your hand in his and asked if you were sure, saying with absolute sincerity that you didn’t have to do anything if you weren’t ready. You gave him a kiss, with it trying to convey all your appreciation for his thoughtfulness, told him you had never been more sure of anything, and then slowly slipped off your dress to reveal the black lace bra and panties.

The expression on his face as he took in the sight of your near-naked body had you blushing. He looked to be in complete awe of you, his eyes wide and mouth slightly agape, as his gaze lingered on the lace and what it barely covered. Still ever so slightly shy, and wanting to maintain just a bit of mystery, you decided to keep the lacy garments on. A minute or so later, after he finally seemed to remember how to speak, he said you were beautiful and perfect, the most stunning woman he’s ever seen in his entire life.

When he eventually moved to put his hands on your body, you scolded him and said he was still wearing entirely too many clothes to allow such behavior. The speed with which he got up and started undressing had you giggling, but you stopped immediately once his shirt and pants were off. You’d seen him in his boxers before, but never like this, never with him straining inside of them with unadulterated desire for you. The sight left you speechless and aching. You gave him the come hither sign and he obliged at once, climbing back onto the bed and settling down directly beside you, his body pressed against yours.

He proceeded to not simply touch your body, but to explore it, savoring every last inch of you. You shuddered as his fingertips brushed over the swell of your breasts and let out a small gasp when he dipped his fingers under the lace to caress them. As his hand then trailed lower, down past your navel, his eyes were locked on yours, watching for any signs of hesitation or discomfort. When he found none, and instead saw only desire, he leaned in to give you a deep kiss and then slowly slipped his hand beneath the lacy fabric.

He was gentle and teasing at first, but grew bolder with every soft moan that left your lips. Attuned to your body’s every response, he quickly learned what you liked most, what subtle changes had your breath hitching and your back arching off the bed. All at once, you realized that you hadn't even come close to imagining the amount of pleasure his long, dexterous fingers could give you; the things he was doing with them had you in pure ecstasy.

At first you were embarrassed at how loud you were being and tried to hold back, but after he said he loved hearing you make such pretty sounds you stopped trying to be quiet. If he wanted to hear how good he made you feel, you would let him hear. In the heat of the moment you also called him ‘baby’, the first time you’d ever referred to him by a pet name, and he told you at once how much he loved hearing that too.

When he wasn’t kissing you or softly sucking and biting at the sensitive skin of your neck, he was whispering into your ear, most of his words being surprisingly, but delightfully filthy: praise over just how much of a good girl you were being for him, an admission of how many times he’d imagined doing this to you, vivid descriptions of all the other things he wanted to do to make you feel good. Given his sweet, innocent nature, you hadn’t ever imagined him talking to you this way, but now that he was, you never wanted him to stop.

Being with him like this was overwhelming, but in the best sense of the word. He was such a generous and attentive partner, using every part himself to make you feel good, from the soft touch of his fingers to the sultry sound of his voice. Before long, he had you falling over the edge, a cry of his name leaving your lips as your body trembled and the pleasure washed over you. Afterwards, as you laid there panting, still slowly coming down from your high, he told you that you’d never looked more beautiful. All you could manage in response was to gaze at him in wonder and adoration, a bashful smile and light blush on your face.

After how good he’d just made you feel, you were determined to give him the same amount of pleasure. It had been a long time since you’d been with someone, the last time being with your boyfriend in college, so you were a bit nervous, but with Tae you felt comfortable and safe and knew it would be OK. Slowly, you ran your fingers down his chest and along the waistband of his boxers. You teased him like that for a few moments before finally nudging the fabric down, your entire body instantly flushing at the sight before you.

The low groan that escaped his lips when you first took him in your hand was by far the most erotic sound that had ever reached your ears. You were certain it would find its way into every single one of your fantasies from that point forward. The feel of him also shot a whole new wave of arousal through you as you thought back to some of the things he’d whispered in your ear and how much more enticing they now seemed.

You began slowly, teasingly, just like he had, but soon found yourself unable to hold back. He had just given you so much, literally worshiped your body; you wanted to give him everything in return, didn’t want to deny him a moment longer. As you continued, mutters of expletives, praise, and your name began falling from his lips, always in the same deep, breathless voice. Every word out of his mouth only made you all the more desperate to satisfy him, to make him feel as good as he made you feel.

Given how vocal he had been while he was in charge, you thought he might like it if you talked to him like that too. The way he bucked his hips as you told him the naughtier parts of your sexy strawberry farmer dream let you know he didn’t like it, he loved it. Mesmerized by the effect your words had on him, you began unraveling three years worth of unprofessional thoughts between hot, open-mouth kisses to his chest.

The sight of him laying there, head thrown back, eyes closed, lower lip bitten, that beautiful purple diamond glistening against his bare chest, was downright sinful; he truly looked like a piece of erotic art. When he came a short while later, and you felt him shaking with pleasure beneath you, heard him moaning your name, you were overcome with a rush of several emotions: desire, pride, but, most of all, bliss. Being with him like this was better than anything you’d ever imagined. You’d never felt closer to him, never loved him more.

~~~

Later on, after cleaning up, watching a movie, and polishing off the rest of the dark chocolate covered strawberries, you were on his bed cuddling, trying hard not to fall asleep and let the night end. You were in his arms laying with your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, while he gently ran his fingers through your hair. He had been softly singing to you for a while now, having serenaded you with ‘Scenery’, ‘Winter Bear’, and, of course, ‘Sweet Night’, when he suddenly stopped singing and grew quiet for a few moments.

“Jagi, can I tell you something?” he asked hesitantly.

“You can tell me anything, Tae,” you assured him as you lifted your head up to look at him.

He didn’t respond right away. He just sat there looking at you, his eyes searching yours as he seemed to be gathering the courage to say his next words.

“You are the first person I have ever been intimate with,” he then said quietly, almost ashamedly.

His admission was honestly not at all surprising. Tae had never been in a serious relationship before and was not someone you ever thought would have casual partners. He was rather traditional when it came to his values, family being of the utmost importance to him, and was, as he had once told you, a hopeless romantic. Knowing what intimacy meant to him, it made complete sense that he hadn’t been with anyone before. It broke your heart, though, that he seemed to think there was something wrong with that fact.

“That’s perfectly OK, Tae,” you told him gently.

“I’m really glad you chose me to share your first experience with,” you then said before giving him a kiss.

“I-I’ve always wanted it to be you,” he said shyly.

The weight of that statement enveloped you like a warm hug; he waited for you. He cared about you that much, thought you were that special, that he wanted his first time to be with you.

“Tae, that means more to me than I will ever be able to put into words,” you said sincerely before leaning in to capture his lips again, trying to express with the kiss what you couldn’t with words.

However, the warmth you felt a second ago immediately disappeared when you realized the next logical step in this conversation would be for you to share your past experiences.

“I’ve been intimate with one other person,” you said tentatively.

“And I’m not a virgin,” you then added quietly.

It’s not that you regretted having sex with your college boyfriend. You were with him for three years, and truly did love him at the time, but you now wished more than anything that you had waited. The love you felt for Tae was so much deeper and you couldn’t help but think that it would have been even more meaningful to share all your first experiences along with him. Upon realizing this, you found yourself getting ever so slightly choked up.

“Y/N, that’s perfectly OK, too,” he said tenderly, sensing you were a little upset.

“It will still be special when we do things for the first time together,” he then said as he leaned in and gave you the sweetest kiss.

If you were choked up before, you were on the verge of full on sobbing now, but for the best of reasons. He was just so wonderful, so kind and sweet and caring. You honestly couldn’t believe how lucky you were to be with him.

Once again, you found yourself on the verge of saying those three words, but before you could utter them, Tannie burst into the room, jumped onto the bed, and plopped down on Tae’s chest exactly where your head had just been.

“Ok he’s definitely jealous that I’m cuddling with you right now,” you said with a laugh.

“Tannie, you’re going to have to learn how to share,” Tae said scoldingly as he gave the pup a scratch behind the ears. “Y/N is going to be staying here with us from now on.”

With the amount of butterflies that started fluttering in your stomach, you were shocked that your body didn’t float up off of the bed.

“I am?” you asked shyly, unable to contain a giant grin from spreading across your face.

“Oh. Shit, I-I didn’t mean to assume. You obviously don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just...I’d really like you to. We could spend so much more time together if you’re staying here. I understand if you’re not ready for that, though. I’m so sorry for just saying that without talking to you first,” he rushed out, growing more and more adorably flustered by the second.

He was just about to start more of his precious ramblings when you brought your finger to his lips to shush him.

“I would love to stay here with you,” you said softly, watching in delight as his lips turned up into a smile beneath your fingertip as you spoke.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 30 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.6k

warnings: implied smut, a lethal amount of fluff

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Chapter 30: Domestic Bliss

After snuggling in bed all morning the night after your dinner date, you finally convinced Tae that, if he actually wanted you to stay with him, he had to first physically let go of you so you could return to your apartment and get your stuff. Begrudgingly he obliged, saying with an adorable pout that he would miss you the whole time you were gone. Several kisses and ‘wait, five more minutes’ later, you extracted yourself from his embrace, got dressed, and headed out to go back to your apartment.

Once you got there, and began packing things into a suitcase, you started trying to wrap your head around everything that had happened in the last 24 hours. All of the developments were profoundly positive, but it had still been a whirlwind to say the least. In some ways, it seemed like things were happening so fast, maybe even a bit too fast. You wondered what your sisters were going to say when you told them you weren’t just dating Tae, but staying with him in his apartment now too. They would probably freak out which you supposed would be a normal reaction given that you and him had only been together for a little over a month.

Still, you kept reminding yourself that, even though you two had only recently shared your feelings with each other, those feelings hadn’t just materialized overnight. They had been slowly growing over the course of several years, as had your relationship. Physical intimacy was obviously a new aspect of that relationship, but emotional intimacy wasn’t. The truth was you and Tae had been closer than mere friends for years, showing your affection for one another in a million little ways, the sum of which had, until recently, gone largely unnoticed. It was almost comical how obvious everything now seemed, but the two of you could laugh about it together knowing it had all worked out in the end.

When you returned to his apartment with your suitcase later that night, you discovered he had already made space for you in his massive closet, emptied a drawer in the en-suite master bathroom, and cleared off the bedside table on the side of the bed he knew you liked. He had also ordered groceries and specifically bought coffee grinds for the coffee maker he had clearly unearthed from somewhere in storage and set on the kitchen counter. As he made dinner for you for the second night in a row, you unpacked your belongings, officially establishing your new semi-permanent residency.

In addition to your clothes, you had also brought with you the ‘I’m Sorry’ Tata Tae had given you as part of your surprise birthday present, stating that he had separation anxiety and wouldn’t want to be left alone in your apartment. Tae’s smile when you pulled him out of your bag was absolutely adorable, all big and boxy, his eyes turning into crescent moons. You put the Tata on the couch in the living room, however, the next morning when you woke up you found him in Tannie’s bed. You chose to take that as a peace offering from the little rascal, a sign that he had finally accepted you into his pack. That morning over breakfast, you and Tae decided that the Tata’s official name would be Tannie Jr., Tanju for short.

It took surprisingly little time for you to feel comfortable with your new living situation, one of the biggest developments being that you no longer felt nervous and anxious every time you came and went from the apartment. After a day or so of walking on eggshells anytime you were in the parking garage or the lobby or the elevator, you realized that no one you encountered really paid you any mind. Tae’s building contained less than 20 units total and all of them were occupied by other rich and famous people. Knowing the true value of privacy, they did not seem to concern themselves with the comings and goings of others. People were certainly friendly, giving a smile or saying ‘good morning’ or engaging in light chit chat about the weather, but you never got the sense they were trying to figure out who you were or why you were there which you greatly appreciated.

Inside the apartment you two fell into a routine almost instantly. Every day when you came back from work it was like a switch had been flipped and, as soon as the door was closed and the outside world was shut out, you went into full couple-mode. You cooked dinner together which always seemed to involve making a mess and howling with laughter. Afterwards, you would snuggle together on the couch watching TV or just cuddle in bed talking about anything and everything for hours at a time.

You always went to bed at the same time, the feeling of Tae wrapping his arms around you never ceasing to bring about the tiniest flutter in your chest. A morning person through and through, you always woke up before him, but you didn’t mind that one bit. Waking up to his adorable, sleepy face, his mouth usually hanging slightly open in the cutest of ways, was by far the best part of your day.  

Physically speaking, things were great, fantastic even. Part of you had wondered if the spark you felt with him the night of your dinner date was only there because it was your first time together. However, you quickly realized that was not at all the case. The chemistry between the two of you was undeniable; you simply could not keep your hands off of one another.

Tae was usually the one to initiate things, casually escalating your innocent kissing to heated makeout sessions which eventually featured his wandering hands, but he always asked if you were OK with things. He also always made it clear he didn’t expect anything in return, stating with utter sincerity that he just liked making you feel good. Your desire for him was as insatiable as his was for you, though, and regardless of who started things, you both always finished them. The two of you fooled around literally every night and oftentimes in the morning too which felt ever so slightly more scandalous knowing you were about to head into work.

You hadn’t gone much further than you did that first night, though, that next day you had nixed the bra, the only downside being that Tae was far less vocal with his mouth now otherwise occupied. The desire to do more was absolutely there, and was definitely mutual, but you agreed to wait and continue to savor the current moment. You were both more than satisfied with the way things were and felt no need to rush; you had all the time in the world to enjoy each other. Besides, the anticipation of taking that next step was pleasurable in and of itself; Tae not-so-subtly teasing you with slightly obscene tongue gestures got you going like nothing else.

You hesitated to say you had officially moved in, you obviously still had your apartment, the lease for which wouldn’t be up for almost another year, but you were clearly living there. Given that the two of you would be leaving soon for a month-long trip to America, these first couple weeks with him felt a bit like a trial run. So far everything had been perfect. You had truly never been happier in your entire life. You hoped more than anything that he felt the same and that, when you got back from your trip, he would ask you to stay for good.

~~~

That Friday you were in the studio packing up your bag and about to head out for the day when you got a text message which had you smiling down at your phone like an idiot.

[Taehyung 4:55 PM] Hey rehearsal is taking forever so I won’t be leaving here for a while. I’ll see you at home later, OK? Text me if you have any trouble getting in. The key I gave you sometimes gets stuck, but just wiggle it around a bit and it will work.

Home

He called it home, not his apartment, but home, the implication being that it was as much your home as it was his. As you reread his text over and over and over again, you thought for sure you would die of happiness right then and there.

The truth was his apartment did feel like home. You had been staying there for less than a week, but it already felt more like home than your own apartment had ever felt at any point during the last three years. This was partly because Tae himself felt like home to you, but also because had gone out of his way to make sure you felt welcomed and comfortable there which you appreciated so much.

After rereading his text message for the hundredth time as you climbed into your car, you decided you wanted to do something special for him as a thank you for all that he had done for you recently. When your stomach started to grumble on the drive home, you knew instantly what you wanted to do. Stopping at the nearest grocery store, you quickly googled an online recipe for a certain special meal, bought the ingredients, and then headed back home.

Not knowing when exactly Tae would be home, you wanted to get started on dinner as soon as possible. Before you did anything, though, you absolutely needed to get out of the dark wash, skin-tight jeans you may or may not have purposefully worn today just to tease him. Walking into the bedroom, you suddenly remembered that most of your clothes were currently in the laundry, but a brilliant idea then popped into your head. After rummaging through Tae’s drawer for a minute, you finally found what you were looking for: his plaid Burberry pajamas. You slipped them on, noting that they were just as ridiculously soft now as they were the first time you wore them, and then headed into the kitchen to get cooking.  

It took you a little while to find all the pots and pans and things you needed, but before long you were humming along. You got the veggies sliced and started cooking and began boiling the water for the glass noodles. While you were cutting up the beef into thin strips, Tannie came bounding over from his bed where he had been lazily lounging since you walked in. He was jumping up and down at your feet, his little paws gently scratching at you through the fabric of the pajama pants. Once you finished the cutting, and placed the meat in the skillet, you finally gave him the attention he was clearly craving.

“Tannie, are you going to be my sous chef?” you cooed, bending down to pet him.

He yipped at you in response which you took as a resounding ‘Yes’.

A half hour later everything was simmering together in the giant wok you found in the kitchen closet. You had just added in the marinade and were pleasantly surprised to find that the concoction in front of you was beginning to look and smell like it was supposed to. Scooping a bit into a bowl and tentatively taking a tiny bite, you squealed with delight when you discovered it tasted exactly like it had the last time you’d ordered it at a restaurant.

“We did good,” you said to Tannie, the pup having begun to run circles at your feet when you got excited.

“We made Daddy a tasty dinner because we love him, don’t we?” you then asked, reaching down to scratch him behind the ears.

Not two seconds later you heard the door to the apartment opening and you immediately scolded yourself for speaking your previous words out loud. You wanted Tae to know you loved him, but you certainly didn’t want him to find out by overhearing you talking to Tannie like a weirdo. Over the last couple days you had actually come up with a plan to tell him in a romantic way while you were in LA as part of your trip to America. You were still a little nervous to say it out loud, but mostly you were excited, so much so that you were finding it harder and harder to not simply blurt it out every time he did or said something sweet.

“Jagi!” Tae called from the entryway. “I’m home!”

Hearing him say those words all excitedly like that had your heart fluttering with domestic bliss.

He burst into the kitchen a moment later, but stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you standing at the stove. Walking over to you, he looked down at the wok and then back up at you, the most adorable look on his face.

“Jagi, you made japchae?” he asked in astonishment.

You nodded your head in reply.

“For me?” he then added, pointing to himself as he spoke.

“Of course I made it for you,” you said with a shy smile.

“I hope it tastes OK,” you went on. “I’m not the best cook, but the recipe seemed easy enou-”

He cut you off with a kiss so forceful it almost knocked you off your feet, but he had thankfully also snuck his arms around your waist which kept you from toppling over.

“I must be dreaming,” he said after he broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against yours.

“I come home after a long day at work and you’re here making my favorite dinner while looking all cozy and cute in my pajamas,” he went on softly.

“No, no, no. I’m not cute,” you said bashfully. “I’m a mess right now.”

“I think I have soy sauce in my hair,” you added with a laugh.

“You look amazing, Jagi,” he said sincerely as he leaned in to give you another kiss.

“So does this,” he then continued, nodding his head towards the stove, a massive grin on his face. “I can’t wait to eat it.”

“But, I hope you know you don’t have to cook for me,” he went on, now sounding a bit more serious. “If anything, I should be the one cooking for you.”

You pulled your head back and furrowed your brow at him.

“I know I don’t have to,” you said earnestly. “I just want to.”

“You always take such good care of me, Tae,” you continued. “I want to take care of you too.”

The expression on his face as he gazed at you was so adoring and reverent, so soft. You literally felt yourself melting into a pile of happy mush beneath it.

“Thank you, Jagi,” he said affectionately as he brought his hands up to cup your cheeks. “I can’t believe how lucky I am to call you mine.”

He leaned in then for the sweetest of kisses, one that was unhurried and lingering, like he was trying to commit to memory the exact feeling of your lips on his. As much as you loved the deeper, more passionate and desperate kisses you often shared, ones like this would always be your favorite. When he kissed you like this, slowly and tenderly, like nothing else in the world mattered, you felt more sure than ever of a truth that had once only existed in your wildest dreams.

He loved you

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 31 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.5k

warnings: implied smut

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Chapter 31: Academy Award

The following Sunday you woke to an empty bed. It was a strange feeling since you had always woken up first and found yourself wrapped in Tae’s warm embrace. After rolling over to look at the clock, though, you realized the likely reason: it was almost 11:00 AM. You’re honestly not sure if you’ve ever slept this late. Then again, you’ve never stayed up until 2:00 AM canoodling with a man who had apparently made it his new mission in life to bring you as much sexual pleasure as physically possible. The fact that you legitimately couldn’t recall how many times Tae made you come last night had you blushing; his appetite for hearing you moan his name was insatiable.

Thinking you could perhaps repay him this morning for all that he gave you last night, you decided to surprise him by greeting him in nothing more than his favorite white ‘Celine’ shirt which happened to be laying on the floor. After slipping out of your tank top and shorts and putting his shirt on, you tip-toed across the bedroom, gently pushed open the door and began silently creeping through the living room. You made your way down the hallway towards the kitchen where you heard him puttering around, and were about to turn the corner to reveal yourself, when you suddenly realized he was talking to someone on the phone. Not wanting to eavesdrop, you quickly turned around to head back to bed, but immediately froze when you heard what came out of his mouth next.

“She is not my girlfriend."

His words hit you like a slap in the face.

He had never specifically called you his girlfriend, but he called you Jagi. He called you his. He asked you to live with him. You were together. You were a couple.

Someone must know, or at least be suspicious, and he must be trying to convince them that nothing was happening between you two. He was just trying to protect you and your relationship. That was the only explanation for why he would say such a thing.

“Honestly, I’m offended that you would even ask me that.”

That blow hurt even more than the first, but you forced yourself to remain calm. He probably meant he was offended to have been accused of doing something against the rules, something risky which could cause a scandal for BTS and Big Hit. Obviously, he had broken the rules and taken a risk by being with you, but he hadn’t done so lightly or thoughtlessly like whoever was on the phone might have implied. He had done it because he cared about you and legitimately wanted to be with you.

“I would be embarrassed to call her my girlfriend.”

Upon hearing those words, though, you physically recoiled; no amount of reasoning could soften that blow. Even if he was just trying to convince someone he wasn’t seeing you, there was absolutely no good reason for him to have made that up as part of his defense.

Unless he wasn’t lying.

Suddenly, all the little doubts and worries that had threatened to invade your mind that day at the photoshoot were back and running rampant, but you used every single ounce of your willpower to keep them at bay.

If he truly thought so little of you, was so ashamed to be associated with you, why had he made you such a big part of his life? Why was he so affectionate and protective and generous? Why did he go out of his way to take care of you and make you happy? Why had he brought you into his home? Why had he done and said so many things that made it seem like he loved you?

It just didn’t make sense.

What he had said was crushing, literally your worst fear being realized, but you were still holding onto a tiny flicker of hope that he didn’t mean it or that it was a misunderstanding or that there was some other logical explanation.

But then he spoke again.

“I put up with her because there is something that I want from her...”

An entire eternity came and went as you waited, in stunned disbelief and complete horror, for him to finish that sentence.

“...and I will do and say whatever I need to in order to get it.”

You stood there motionless, absolutely paralyzed by the crushing weight of the devastation that was welling up inside you. This was why he didn’t want anyone to know what was happening between you two, why it was so easy for him to say that he wasn’t seeing someone, why he had pushed your relationship forward so quickly, why everything honestly just seemed too good to be true.

He was playing you.

He was using you.

And, there was no question in your mind as to what it was that he wanted.

You’d given it to him just last night.

Never in a million years would you have believed that he would do something like this, that he would even be capable of doing something like this, but you had heard him admit to it with your own ears. What hurt the most was realizing how long he must have been planning this. He had spent months, no years, gradually, almost imperceptibly reeling you in. Surely he knew all along how you felt about him and had just been waiting for you to finally let your guard down enough to let yourself believe he felt the same.

And, you did. Up until a minute ago you believed with all of your heart that Kim Taehyung truly loved you.

But he didn’t.

You felt your world collapsing around you and it took every bit of strength you had left not to physically collapse along with it right there in the hallway. Silently, you crept back to his bedroom, closing the door behind you without making a sound. As you stood there looking at the rumpled blankets on his bed, you recalled with disgust everything that had happened in it, the intimate ways you had let him touch you.

You realized at once that you were going to be sick. Rushing to the ensuite bathroom, you soon found yourself dry-heaving over the toilet. Nothing was coming out, yet your body kept trying to empty itself, rid itself of him. You suddenly felt dirty, absolutely filthy. Every single part of your body that he had touched felt contaminated. You needed to cleanse yourself. You needed to remove all traces of him, scrub off every single one of his kisses and caresses.

Struggling to your feet, you went to the shower and turned it on. You made the water uncomfortably hot, almost scalding, ripped off his shirt and threw it onto the floor, and then got in. It hurt, the heat was practically searing your skin, but the pain paled in comparison to the ache in your chest. Suddenly exhausted, you sat on the floor, curled up into a ball, and silently sobbed.

You don’t know how long you were in there like that. The concept of time became irrelevant when your sense of reality had been completely shattered. You honestly might have stayed in there all day, Tae’s words stuck on an endless, heart wrenching loop in your head, but the sound of the bathroom door opening pulled you from your thoughts.

“Jagi, do you want me to make you breakfast?” you heard him ask from the door, his voice sickly sweet.

Jagi

Hearing him say that one word, knowing it was utterly meaningless other than to propagate his lie, was infinitely more painful than hearing all the other heartbreaking words he’d said combined.

“Jagi?” he called again when you didn’t respond.

You had to say something. If he said that word one more time you were going to shatter into a million pieces.

“I’m not hungry,” you called back, the shakiness in your voice masked by the sound of the pouring water.

You took a deep breath and tried to calm your heart and steady your breath. If you wanted to keep the last shred of your dignity intact, you couldn’t let him know you had heard him, couldn’t let him know how absolutely devastated you were right now. You just needed to keep it together long enough to get out of the apartment. Only once you had gotten away from him could you start trying to put the pieces of your life back together.

“I actually don’t feel well,” you then said, hoping that sounded believable.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, sounding all concerned like he actually cared.

“I don’t know,” you replied. “I just feel sick.”

“Look, I’ll be out in a minute, OK?” you added before he could say anything back. “We can talk then.”

“Ok,” he said hesitantly. “I’ll be out in the living room.”

Once you heard him close the bathroom door, you waited another minute and then finally turned off the water. You stepped out of the shower, dried off, and then went back into his bedroom. Still in a daze, you hastily got dressed and then stuffed your toiletries and whatever else you could easily find in his room into your day bag, not even bothering to take anything that was in the closet. After slipping on a facemask, you stepped out of the bedroom to find him waiting for you on the couch. He looked genuinely worried, but you forced yourself to remember that it was just an act.

“I-I’m going to go stay at my apartment,” you said, trying desperately to keep your voice from breaking.

He immediately stood up when you said that, now looking completely distraught.

“What?! Jagi, no. You can’t leave,” he said in alarm. “You need to stay here where I can take care of you.”

“I don’t want to get you sick,” you replied cautiously. “We leave for America in three days. If you got sick now it would be a disaster.”

“Whatever you have I probably already have it,” he argued, running his hand through his hair as he spoke. “I mean we...we spent all night together.”

You flinched at his words; the last thing you wanted was to be reminded of what you two had done last night.

“We don’t know that for sure,” you said evenly. “And you owe it to the guys not to take the risk.”

You could sense his resolve starting to falter ever so slightly when you said that. The fact of the matter was that it would be a disaster if he or any of the other guys got sick now. Getting sick or injured before concerts or shows was always one of their biggest concerns. Given that they were preparing for not just one event, but a whole month-long string of events, that concern was infinitely greater.

“I’ll just stay there for a day or so and sleep it off,” you continued. “I’m sure I’ll be fine after that.”

“Jagi,” he said, sounding so conflicted. “I don’t like the idea of you being alone when you’re sick.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay here?” he then asked pleadingly. “What if you sleep in our bedroom and I sleep in one of the guest bedrooms?”

Upon hearing him refer to it as ‘our bedroom’, you actually felt your heart ripping in half. There was truly no limit to his cruelty.

“No,” you said, your voice catching just a bit. “I want to go home.”

He did not miss you referring to your apartment as home and you did not miss the hurt that then flashed across his face.

“OK,” he finally said dejectedly as he started walking towards you. “I’ll walk you out.”

“Stay back,” you almost shouted as you put your hands up defensively, horrified at the idea of him being near you, let alone touching you.

Your reaction had clearly wounded him; the flash of hurt from a second ago was now an obvious pain etched deeply on his face.

“Jagi, is something else wrong?” he asked, his voice trembling. “Did I do something to upset you?”

Him having the audacity to ask you those questions, knowing full-well the terrible things he had said about you and admitted to less than an hour ago, literally made your stomach churn. He was, without a doubt, a truly incredible actor. He deserved a fucking Academy Award for this performance.

“No,” you lied. “I’m just tired and stressed.”

“But, why...why does it seem like you’re afraid of me,” he questioned, now looking to be on the verge of tears.

You were afraid of him, afraid of just how much more damage he could cause to your already bruised and bleeding heart. You had to get out of there. Every single second you spent with him made the pain in your chest exponentially worse.

“Baby, I’m just afraid of getting you sick,” you said in the sweetest, tenderest voice you could muster. “I would feel terrible if I got you sick right before the trip.”

It almost killed you to call him that, to speak to him so lovingly, but it was worth it because he finally seemed to buy your lie.

“OK,” he said quietly, looking down at the floor as he spoke.

For a moment you just stood there staring at him. He looked so miserable, so broken, and you instinctively felt the urge to go and comfort him. You almost did too, almost walked over and wrapped him in your arms, but then you remembered that the sight before you wasn't real, nothing he had ever said or done had been real, and your heart instantly hardened again.

“I’m going to go now” you said as you picked up your bag and started down the hallway. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Bye, Jagi,” you heard him call out softly behind you. “I hope you feel better.”

You didn’t respond or even acknowledge him, you just kept walking towards the door, hoping and praying he wasn’t going to follow you. You got there, and were just about to leave, literally had your hand on the doorknob, when you heard the unmistakable sound of little paws clicking on hardwood. Turning around, you found Tannie had followed you to the door and was now looking up at you excitedly.

You had done so well, had held it together and been so strong, but for some reason looking down at his little adorably angry face was what finally broke the dam.

“Bye Tannie,” you whispered, choking back a sob as you reached down and gave him, for probably the last time, a gentle scratch behind the ears. “Take care of Tanju for me.”

You then placed the apartment key on the entryway table, opened the door, and walked out of Kim Taehyung’s apartment and his life.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 32 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.0k

warnings: cursing

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Chapter 32: Lost And Found

After leaving Tae’s, you drove straight to your older sister Jia’s apartment, not even bothering to text or call her ahead of time. She lived in Gangneung, a city on the coast about two and half hours east of Seoul. When she opened the door to find you standing on her front step, tears streaming down your face, she didn’t even bat an eye. She just stepped forward, wrapped you in a hug, and told you ‘It’s going to be OK’.

Your first instinct had been to drive home to Busan, but at the last second you decided against it. If you showed up there randomly after having visited just two weeks ago, your Dad would have immediately known something was up. As much as you loved him, and as close as the two of you were, you weren’t sure you were ready to explain everything to him.

You had never specifically talked to your dad about your feelings for Tae, but you got the sense he might already know there was something going on between you two. The first time you visited him after coming home from your last trip to America, he had asked if you ever found out who sent you those dark chocolate-covered strawberries on Valentine’s Day. At first you deflected the question, and pretended like you had no idea, but eventually you told him that you thought it might have been Tae. You tried not to seem too hopeful or excited when you said it, but the knowing look your dad gave you made it pretty clear he saw right through your nonchalance. He didn’t call you out, though, he just smiled and said, ‘Whoever it was must care a lot about you’.

The memory of those dark chocolate-covered strawberries, and the ones Tae made himself just last weekend, were two in an infinite list of memories that began weighing heavily on your mind as you drove east: the song, him protecting you from Hyun, your night in the studio, the music box, him sticking up for you to Mrs. Choi, that evening on the beach, how respectful and generous he was when you were intimate, him giving you the bed the night of The Grammys, the Tatas, all the tender kisses he’d given you over the last month.

The more you thought about everything, the more unlikely it seemed that the kind, sweet man you had come to know and trust and love over the last three years was the fake Kim Taehyung and that the selfish, cruel one you thought you heard in the kitchen this morning was the real one. Things just didn’t add up, but the panic-stricken version of yourself from earlier in the day unfortunately hadn’t been able to see that.

About halfway through the drive you had a revelation so horrifying that you had to pull over to let yourself fully comprehend it:

What if he was talking about someone else?

A half hour later, just as you were about to get off at your sister’s exit, another alarming thought entered your mind:

I doubted him like this once before and was completely wrong

When you pulled into your sister’s driveway, and took out your phone to check the messages you had received while you were driving, your regret and guilt only grew.

[Taehyung 1:34 PM] Jagi, can I please come pick you up and take you home?

[Taehyung 1:36 PM] I never should have let you leave. If you’re sick I need to take care of you. I need to make you tea and feed you soup and bring you extra blankets and give you medicine so you can get better soon.

[Taehyung 1:40 PM] I know you’re worried about getting me sick, and I appreciate so much that you are so thoughtful and so selfless, but taking care of you and making sure you’re healthy and safe and happy is my priority.

[Taehyung 1:45 PM] I don’t want you to ever think that my job with BTS is more important than you. You will always come first, Jagi.

[Taehyung 2:03 PM] I realize you’re probably asleep right now, but please call me when you wake up so I can come get you.

As you sat there, reading and rereading his loving messages, you felt an awful, terrible sinking feeling in your stomach. What if you had gotten it wrong? What if he truly was talking about someone else and it was all just a big misunderstanding?

As soon as you got inside you spilled the whole story to Jia, right up to and including the awful events from earlier that day. When she, the same woman who had once called Tae ‘The biggest fucking idiot to walk the Earth’, said that you might have overreacted and jumped to conclusions, you knew you had just made the biggest mistake of your life.

You felt your heart shattering into a million pieces for the second time today, but this time the pain was infinitely worse. You had to tell him, had to come clean, but you didn't know what to say. You didn’t know how to even begin to apologize for the awful things you’d let yourself believe about him, for how terribly you’d treated him that morning.

Jia encouraged you to call him and just try to explain everything, but you honestly didn’t know if you could get the words out. This felt like a conversation you should have in person, but you were unfortunately now hours away from him. You knew you couldn’t ignore him forever, though, so you finally called him to at least apologize for lying and leaving.

“Hi, Jagi,” he said after answering right away.

“Hi, Tae,” you said, your voice immediately breaking when you said his name.

“Jagi, why are you crying?” he said in alarm. “Do you feel that sick?”

You took a couple deep breaths before you finally felt calm enough to speak.

“I-I’m not sick,” you replied shamefully. “I lied and said I was, but I’m not.”

“You were right. I was upset about something,” you said shakily. “But I was wrong about it and made a big mistake.”

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry for lying and leaving,” you said through a sob. “I’m so sorry for everything.”

“Jagi, it’s OK,” he said soothingly. “Whatever it is we can talk about it.”

“I don’t think I can talk about it now,” you said honestly as the shame continued to build inside you.

“I’ll come home tomorrow and we can talk then,” you added with a sniffle.

“I just needed you to know I’m so sorry and I appreciate everything you do for me,” you then added as more tears poured down your face. “You’re so good to me and I don’t deserve you.”

“Don’t say that, Jagi,” he said, sounding genuinely hurt that you would even say such a thing.

“Please let me come take you home now,” he then pleaded. “I hate that you’re so upset and I’m not with you.”

“I just...I can’t come home yet,” you said, feeling guiltier by the second with how kind and understanding he was being.

Every sweet, gentle word he said now only made it all the more obvious just how ridiculous it had been for you to think those terrible things about him. Overcome with a new wave of shame and regret, you began to cry even harder.

“I-I have to go now,” you said almost incoherently. “I promise we’ll talk tomorrow.”

“I’m sorry again, Tae,” you finally said before ending the call.

At that you turned off your phone, went into the guest bedroom, and cried yourself to sleep wondering how you were ever going to gather up the courage to go home and tell him the truth.

~~~

You woke sometime later to the sound of a soft knock on the bedroom door. Glancing at your phone on the nightstand, you saw it was almost 7:00 PM and realized you had been asleep for over three hours. Given the exhausting day you’d had, it honestly wasn’t all that surprising you’d slept so long.

“Come in,” you mumbled from beneath the blankets after you heard another knock.

“Someone is here to see you,” Jia said quietly.

Thinking there was only one person who she could possibly be referring to, you waited to hear the voice of your younger sister, Nari, but it surprisingly never came.

“Hi Jagi,” a familiar deep voice called out instead.

Your heart momentarily stopped.

“Tae?” you replied shakily as you lifted your head up to look at him, unwilling to let yourself believe he was actually there unless you saw him with your own two eyes.

“It’s me,” he said softly as he came and sat down on the edge of the bed.

It was him. He was really there. You were lost, but he had come and found you. You had no idea how, but you didn’t care. You were so happy and relieved to see him that tears welled up in your eyes.

“Can I lay down with you?” he asked gently.

“Of course,” you replied, hating that he felt like he had to ask because of how you had treated him this morning, how you had pushed him away.

He took off his jacket, lifted up the covers, and laid down next to you so he was facing you. He kept a bit of space between you two, but he reached out and took your hand. After bringing it to his lips and giving it a gentle kiss, he laid it back down on the bed. For a few minutes he didn’t say anything, he just rubbed your thumb with his and stared into your eyes longingly.

“Did you hear me talking on the phone this morning?” he asked quietly.

You nodded and there was another silence before he spoke again.

“Did you think I was talking about you?” he then asked in a softer, almost fearful voice.

You nodded your head again as a few tears finally escaped.

“Oh, Jagi,” he whispered as he squeezed your hand, the pain in his voice unmistakable. “I’m so sorry.”

“I was talking about Jisoo, ” he admitted sorrowfully. “Jungkook called and asked if she was the woman I have been secretly dating.”

“I guess he has seen me talking to her recently around Big Hit which is why he thought she might be my new girlfriend,” he then added.

You did not realize Tae had been talking to Jisoo again and the confusion must have shown on your face because he immediately continued.

“I want to re-record ‘Sweet Night’ with someone else on backing vocals,” he explained. “I wrote that song for you and it just feels all wrong having her on it after everything she did and how awful she’s always been to you.”

“But, because she unfortunately did get credited, I need her permission to change it,” he went on frustratedly. “So I have been sucking up to her and jumping through all her hoops to get her to agree.”

“I didn’t say anything about it because I wanted it to be a surprise,” he then said. “You’ve never asked to listen to the actual song and I couldn’t help but wonder if it was because she is on it.”

He was right. You loved when he sang ‘Sweet Night’ for you, but you purposefully had never asked to hear the actual recorded version. Obviously, you would have listened to it once it was released, but you knew it would always be somewhat tainted because Jisoo was on it and therefore weren’t all that excited to hear it.

“Everything makes so much sense now,” you said quietly as a wave of embarrassment washed over you.

Someone asking about Jisoo was completely logical given how much time they had spent together and how hard she pushed their public image when they first recorded the song. You honestly could not believe that you hadn’t immediately thought of her as the person he was likely talking about.

“Jagi, I know what I said must have been really hurtful at the time, but why didn’t you just talk to me?” he asked a few moments later.

“I-I don’t know,” you replied, reaching up to wipe away a few more tears that had trickled out. “I just panicked.”

“I was just so overwhelmed it was hard to think straight,” you then admitted with a sniffle.

He was quiet then for a couple minutes and you could tell that he was thinking deeply about something. By the time he spoke again, he wore an extremely pained expression that made your heart absolutely ache.

“When I said I wanted something, and you thought I was talking about you, did you think…,” he started before his voice broke and he had to take a moment to collect himself. “Did you think I only wanted you for your body?”

You didn’t respond, but from the look on your face he must have known he guessed correctly. Upon realizing this, upon realizing you legitimately thought he was just using you for sexual pleasure, the first few tears began rolling down his face.

“Jagi, it breaks my heart that you thought I would do that to you,” he said in the saddest, smallest voice you’ve ever heard. “That I would disrespect you and hurt you like that.”

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered as tears started pouring down your cheeks.  

As you looked at him, and saw his beautiful features twisted into an expression of such agony, an overwhelming amount of shame and regret crashed down upon you. All you could think was that he’s never going to want to be with you now. Not after this. Not when he sees that you’re more trouble than you’re worth. He was nothing but wonderful to you, literally gave you everything, and you repaid him by jumping to conclusions and assuming the absolute worst of him.

“I’m sorry for everything,” you said before a great heaving sob finally left you.

Unable to face him any longer, unable to continue staring at the wreckage that you caused, you flipped over and turned away from him. You were sure that any second now he was going to get up and leave. He was going to tell you he wanted you out of his life for good and you wouldn’t even blame him for it. All of this was your fault. You ruined it. You had everything you ever wanted, but you ruined it with your insecurity.

You realized at once that the pain you felt this morning when your own heart was broken was nothing in comparison to the pain of knowing you had broken the heart of the person you loved most. Doubting him like this, and letting yourself believe he could be so cruel, was by far the worst thing you’d ever done in your entire life and you honestly didn’t know how you were ever going to recover from it.

You suddenly felt like you couldn’t breathe, like the room was spinning and you were falling and you couldn’t breathe, but then Tae’s arms were wrapping around you and pulling you close. Back in his warm embrace, where you had come to feel so safe and secure, you finally started to calm down. The weight on your chest lifted and you began breathing, slow, deep, steady breaths.

You were OK. He wasn’t leaving. He hadn’t given up on you.

“Jagi, it’s OK,” he said gently as he hugged you tighter. “I know you were just hurt and scared.”

“It was my fault to begin with,” he added guiltily. “I should have realized how that would have sounded to you and been more careful.”

“I’m sorry that this is all so hard,” he then said after a minute. “Having a secret relationship, all the hiding and the lying. I know it makes it so much harder to trust and feel OK about everything.”

“I know we can do it, though,” he went on hopefully. “We just need to always be honest with each other.”

“No more secrets, OK?” he added finally.

“No more secrets,” you repeated as you snuggled deeper into his embrace.

The two of you laid there like that for a while, both emotionally and physically exhausted after the incredibly trying day you’d had. After a bit Tae began humming softly in your ear, knowing it always helped calm you down, but eventually he stopped. You thought perhaps he might have fallen asleep, but then he stirred and broke the silence.

“I love you,” he said quietly as he pressed a gentle kiss to your shoulder.

I love you

Of all the ways you imagined him saying those three words to you for the first time, you’d never imagined it would happen like this. You thought he would say it during a moment that was perfect and idyllic, not after this whole mess where you had made a huge mistake and deeply hurt him. You realized, though, that him choosing to say them now was so much more romantic and meaningful than what you had imagined. He was telling you that he loved you even at your worst, insecurities and imperfections and all.

You turned in his arms to face him and found him looking at you with a hesitant smile.

“I love you, too,” you told him before gently kissing the tip of his nose.

“I have loved you for three years,” you then admitted shyly.

“What a coincidence,” he said as his little smile grew into a big grin. “I have loved you for three years.”

When he kissed you then, slowly and tenderly, like he had done so many times before, you found yourself in a state of utter bliss knowing with absolute certainty what he was telling you every time his lips brushed yours.

I love you. I love you. I love you.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 33 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.6k

warnings: none

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Chapter 33: No More Secrets

Even if Tae hadn’t told you he loved you, you would have been certain he did anyway after he literally drove across the country to come be with you. After you had hung up and turned off your phone, he had driven straight to your apartment, convinced you were definitely not OK. Once he realized you weren’t there, he texted Jia, having still had her phone number from when he bought the Zico concert tickets for the three of you last year. She told him you were at her apartment, he immediately asked for the address, and then started driving east.

Just like you, he’d had a revelation mid-drive: that you had heard him talking in the kitchen that morning and thought he was talking about you. He said he felt sick to his stomach when he figured it out and you believed him. That’s exactly how you had felt.

After lying in bed snuggling for a little while longer, you two finally got up and emerged from the guest bedroom. Jia was sitting on the couch casually watching TV and when she looked over and saw you two holding hands, no doubt looking all sappy and lovey-dovey, her face broke out into a smug smile.

“I would just like to say that the two of you both owe me big time,” she said as she folded her arms across her chest. “I downloaded Tinder and got this train moving.”

“She’s not wrong,” Tae said with a laugh as he gave your hand a squeeze.

“That was the push I needed to realize I couldn’t live without you anymore,” he then said shyly before giving you a kiss on the cheek which tickled and made you scrunch up your face all cutely.

“Oh my god, you two are so adorable it’s disgusting,” she then said, though, the big smile on her face told you she was anything but appalled at the sight of you so happy.

“Kim Taehyung,” she then said sternly. “I respect you for coming all the way out here and can see that you truly do love my sister, but I just need you to know that, even though you are rich and famous, I will not hesitate to kick your ass if you hurt her.”

“Understood,” Tae replied seriously, giving her a respectful nod.

The three of you chatted for a little while longer and also Facetimed with Nari who was over the moon to hear that you and Tae were together, but devastated not to be there in person. You promised her the four of you would get together soon and Tae even offered to have them both stay at the apartment which literally made Nari squeal. Eventually, though, you and Tae needed to head out since it was getting late and you both had to be at Big Hit tomorrow morning.

The two of you had obviously driven there separately, but Tae was adamant that you drove home with him since it was dark and you were tired, saying he would pay to have someone drive your car back to Seoul tomorrow. Normally you would have gotten on your feminist horse and assured him that you were more than capable of driving yourself, but the truth was that you were exhausted and it actually might not be safe for you to drive. Also, as pathetic as it was, you just didn’t want to be away from him for two and half hours, not when you were still basking in his love for you.

During your talk, you two had agreed to ‘no more secrets’, so you decided to spend the drive back to Seoul asking some difficult, but important questions. The idea of being open and vulnerable, of revealing even more of your insecurities and fears, was slightly terrifying, but you knew this was something you needed to do. You guys couldn’t afford to have another incident like the one you did this morning.

The whole situation had been one big heartbreaking misunderstanding and Tae had been absolutely right when he said that all the secrecy surrounding your relationship had played a role. You’d only been together a month, but already it was starting to take its toll: he was stressed because people were asking questions, you were insecure because he had to lie about you. It just wasn’t healthy to have to keep everything hidden and bottled up, to be made to feel guilty simply because you loved each other and wanted to be together. If you were going to make it work, you needed to work together against the ever growing number of forces trying to keep you apart. To make sure you were on the same page, pushing forward in the same direction, you needed to be honest with each other, brutally so if that’s what it took.

After getting up onto the highway and settling in, Tae reached over and took your hand, carefully lacing his fingers with yours. He brought it to his lips and gave the back of it a tender kiss and then rested your joint hands on the center console. He said he loved you, that he would still love you when you got back to Seoul, and then said he’d like to go first.

“Why is it so easy for you to doubt my feelings for you?” he asked hesitantly.

You couldn’t deny that it hurt to hear him ask that question, but you knew after everything that had happened he had every right to be concerned about this. It took you a minute or so to think through how you were going to respond. You wanted to be honest, that was the whole point of doing this, but you didn’t want to hurt him in the process.

“You know how you said on Friday, ‘I must be dreaming’?” you asked, continuing after he gave you a little nod. “That’s how I feel all the time and I’m always just so scared of waking up.”

You let the weight of that statement sink in for a few moments before you continued.

“I spent so long feeling confused about what was happening between us, and wondering if everything was all just in my head, that it's hard to believe all of this is real sometimes,” you then admitted.

Again you paused, partly to let him think about what you’d just said, but also because you needed to collect yourself before you went on.

“There were times when you would be so affectionate and protective and flirty that I was sure you felt something for me,” you started tentatively. “But then other times you would treat me like just another friend or worse, be cold and actually push me away.”

His grip on your hand tightened as your words cut through him.

“It was such an emotional rollercoaster,” you said quietly. “I didn’t think you were purposefully trying to hurt me, but it was really hard to deal with that whiplash for three years.”

You looked over at him and saw that guilt was written all over his face upon realizing that he had been the one to plant all those seeds of doubt in your head.

“I’m so sorry, Jagi,” he said, gravely. “I never meant to give you mixed signals or make it seem like I was playing with you.”

He took a deep breath and gave your hand another squeeze before he spoke again.

“I just didn’t know what to do with my feelings for you,” he admitted. “I loved you so much and I was constantly torn between trying to hide it and wanting to tell you.”

“I wanted to be with you, but I was also so scared of losing you,” he went on quietly. “I knew we weren’t allowed to be together and that the second anyone found out how I felt you would be transferred to another group or fired altogether.”

“I tried to show you how much I cared about you, and tried so many times to subtly let you know I wanted to be more than friends, but you never gave me a clear sign that you wanted to be together,” he then added. “And, I didn’t want to push you or do anything to jeopardize your job if I wasn’t absolutely sure it’s what you wanted.”

You had been looking down at your lap, playing with a string on the hem of your sweater, but when he said those words your head instantly shot up. The idea that he had been waiting for some sort of sign from you had truly never occurred to you. To you, it always seemed like the decision to pursue something more needed to come from him because he was the idol, but to him the decision needed to come from you because it was your job at risk.

“I mean, I knew you were attracted to me,” he said, giving you a little sideways smirk.

You rolled your eyes at him, but blushed nonetheless.

“And, I was pretty sure that you liked me liked me,” he went on teasingly.

At his use of elementary school terminology you couldn’t help but laugh.

“But, I didn’t know if you wanted this,” he then said more seriously, lifting up your intertwined hands. “I didn’t know you if you actually wanted a relationship with me.”

You tried to respond to him, but your mouth was filled with cotton. This was like realizing he had planned on telling you how he felt the morning after The Grammys, only infinitely worse. It wasn’t just extra months you could have been together, it was extra years. Looking back now, you realized he had given you plenty of signs that he actually wanted to be with you, but you had been too hesitant and afraid to acknowledge them at the time. It was understandable given how much you had to lose if you were wrong or if things didn’t work out, but it was heartbreaking nonetheless to know how much time had been wasted.

“Honestly, I always thought that deep down you knew how I felt about you and realized that I was waiting until we could be together,” he then said somewhat shyly. “That’s why I never dated anyone else, Jagi. I was waiting for you.”

“But, then everything with Jisoo happened and Jia downloaded Tinder and you set up that date. I knew then that I couldn’t wait anymore, that I had to make it clear how I really felt about you. Even if it was risky to get involved while you were still working at Big Hit, the risk of losing you forever was so much worse,” he said sincerely.

You sat there for a few minutes as his words washed over you again and again like waves on the sand. A part of you was frustrated, mostly at the situation in general, but also at yourself. Your instinct was to beat yourself up for being so oblivious and scared, for not seeing what was right in front of you, but you fought against it. Dwelling on what you could have done or should have done wasn’t at all productive. You were together now and that was truly all that mattered.

“I love you,” he said, pulling you from your thoughts.

“And, I’m sorry again that I confused you and made you doubt things before,” he added somberly.

“I love you too,” you replied. “And, I promise to trust you, be upfront with my feelings, and not let what happened in the past come between us now.”

For the next few minutes neither of you spoke. You just sat there together in comfortable silence, Tae’s thumb gently thumbing yours. Eventually, though, you saw him look over at you expectantly and realized it was your turn to ask an important question.

“Why don’t you want to tell the rest of the guys about us?” you asked quietly.

“I know we need to keep our relationship a secret from virtually everyone, but they are your brothers. They are the people you’re closest with, the ones you trust most in the entire world. If anyone was going to be happy for us or supportive of our relationship, wouldn’t it be them?” you then questioned.

He went to start answering your question, but you had one more thing you needed to get off your chest so you continued before he could speak.

“It just...it hurts me that you don’t want them to know,” you said finally, your voice catching just a bit. “It makes me think that you really are ashamed to be with me.”

He looked so hurt when you said that, which made your heart absolutely ache, but you knew he needed to know the truth about how you felt. That was the only way the two of you were going to move forward and make this work.

“Jagi, I’m so sorry that I’ve made you feel that way,” he said sadly. “That was not at all my intention.”

“Please believe me when I say that I could never be ashamed to be with you,” he then added.

“I do want to tell them. I want to tell everyone. I want to post a picture of you on Twitter and tell the whole world ‘This is my beautiful, talented, amazing girlfriend who I have been in love with for three years and finally get to be with.’,” he said with a smile.

You felt all warm and fuzzy inside hearing him call you his girlfriend for the first time.

“But, I’m afraid that telling the guys will be like opening up the floodgates,” he went on. “If I know that they know about us, I’m going to want to talk about you all the time. I’m going to want to tell them all the cute things you do and say, brag about your cooking and how you take such good care of me, ask them for relationship advice when things inevitably get hard.”

“Only, it wouldn’t be like keeping Namjoon-hyung’s wife or Jimin’s girlfriend a secret from ARMY where we just have to be careful in public. We would have to be careful all the time and I just...I don’t trust myself not to say something in front of the wrong person,” he finally admitted with a sigh.

What he said made complete sense. The guys were constantly surrounded by staff members, were always in front of cameras or hooked up to microphones. If something ever slipped out, it’s not like it could just be edited out before ARMY saw the final product. By that point it would already be too late.

“I do want to tell them,” he reiterated, giving your hand a squeeze. “And, I promise we will soon. I just need to make sure I can handle it first, that I can contain all this love I have for you.”

“My parents are the only people I’ve told so far because I know all my conversations with them are private,” he then added.

You felt your heart do a little somersault.

“You told your parents?” you asked with a shy smile.

“Of course,” he replied immediately. “They’ve known all along how I felt about you.”

You sat there in stunned silence, a huge, silly grin on your face.

“I went to visit them about a month after you started at Big Hit,” he began bashfully. “It took my Mom all of five minutes to decide I had a crush on my new stylist and another hour to realize that I was legitimately in love with her.”

“They can’t wait to meet you,” he then said, turning and giving you a big smile.

And now your heart was doing a full Olympic gymnastics routine.

You guys spent the rest of the drive asking each other more questions that had been on your minds since you’d started dating. Tae asked if it made you upset that he was so flirty with ARMY on stage and on social media and you said honestly that it didn’t. You understood it was part of his job and had learned to be OK with it even before you were together. Now that you were sure he loved you, you knew it would bother you even less. You asked him if he would be upset if you told Eunji and Donghae you were casually dating on Tinder since they had already asked if you were seeing someone. He said that was fine, but that he would prefer you not download the app again, even if it was only for show, saying with an innocent smile that he just didn’t think it was fair to have the men of Tinder getting their hopes up that you might one day be theirs.

He asked if you wanted to officially move in once you got back from America and you couldn’t say yes fast enough. He offered to pay off the rest of your apartment lease so you could move out of it entirely, but you said you’d prefer to keep paying it yourself until it was up. That then led to a larger discussion about finances which was far less uncomfortable than you thought it would be. You explained that one of your worries was being accused of using him for his money as well as his fame. He assured you that he knew you absolutely were not and then said he would vehemently deny those accusations if they ever came about. You also told him it made you uncomfortable to be living at the apartment and not be contributing at all to living expenses so you guys agreed to split costs for everyday things like groceries or takeout or movie rentals.

All in all, it was a really productive conversation, one you probably should have had sooner, to be honest. Had you begun dating under normal circumstances like virtually everyone else on the planet, you probably would have gone over some of these things right from the start, but, alas, your situation was quite unique.

You were back within the Seoul city limits, and were only about fifteen minutes away from home, when something else popped into your head.

“Tae,” you began hesitantly. “What is your biggest fear when it comes to our relationship?”

He did not hesitate with his answer which told you this was something he had clearly already thought a lot about.

“Aside from someone finding out about us and you being taken away from me, my biggest fear is that someone will try to hurt you,” he said, bringing your hand into his lap protectively. “That they’ll threaten you or try to use you to get to me.”

You felt a little shiver go up your spine when he said that. The idea that you were now some kind of target wasn’t something you had really considered, but thinking back to everything that Namjoon’s wife, Aera, had gone through, you realized that you absolutely were.

“For obvious reasons we have to keep our relationship a secret from Big Hit, but because of that you don’t get the protection you should be getting as my girlfriend,” he continued solemnly.

“Everyone else’s partners have security teams that check in on them and make sure they aren’t being followed or their apartments aren’t being watched,” he went on. “If any of them ever feel unsafe for any reason, they can call Big Hit security directly and get help right away.”

“But, you can’t do that,” he then said quietly. “And that makes me feel incredibly nervous and also extremely guilty.”

“I don’t want you to be scared, though, Jagi,” he said after a moment, tightening his grip on your hand. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I promise I’ll always keep you safe and take care of you.”

You had been ever so slightly scared before he said that, but his reassurance was all the comfort you needed to relax; you knew with absolute certainty that he would do whatever it took to keep that promise.

“What about you?” he then asked. ”What is your biggest fear?”

Unlike him, you didn’t respond right away. It wasn’t because you didn’t already know what your biggest fear was, but because you were afraid of sharing it with him, even after everything you had just talked about.

“Jagi, you can tell me,” he said reassuringly, sensing your apprehension. “Whatever it is.”

You took a deep breath, hoping what you were about to say wouldn’t undo all the progress you had made over the last two plus hours.

“My biggest fear is that one day, once everything with BTS has settled down and you have more time and freedom to do things and go places and meet people, you will leave me because you realized that you never actually wanted to be with me, but that you just wanted to be with someone and I was the most convenient option,” you rushed out, not even realizing you had started to tear up while you were talking.

As the car came to a halt at a red light, Tae let go of your hand and instead brought it up to cup your cheek.

“Look at me, Jagi,” he said gently.

You turned to him and found him looking at you with the most tender, loving expression.

“You are not convenient,” he said, stroking your cheek and brushing away the one tear that had escaped. “You are perfect, truly the woman of my dreams. You are all I have ever wanted, all I will ever want.”

“I promise I’m never going to leave,” he then said softly before leaning over to give you a sweet kiss.

And in that moment you trusted, with all your heart, that he would keep that promise too.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 34 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.2k

warnings: handjob, fingering, oral sex (m/f receiving)

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Chapter 34: Open The Door

Three days later you were somewhere over the Pacific Ocean on a chartered flight to America. You were only halfway through the twelve hour trip and already your laptop had died, taking with it your one real form of entertainment. Tae had reminded you to put your charger in your carry on bag no less than ten times, but still you had forgotten, something he would no doubt tease you for once you landed.

You obviously weren’t sitting together; he was up in first class while you were back in coach. It was probably for the best, though, that you and Tae were physically separated right now. The sights and sounds and sensations from the previous night were too temptingly fresh on your mind. If he was sitting next to you, even with all of your coworkers around, you’re honestly not sure you would be able to keep your hands off of him.

Tae telling you he loved you had done something to you. The knowledge that he was completely and irrefutably yours somehow made him infinitely sexier, truly irresistible. From the moment he said those three special words, you felt an intense urge to physically express how much you loved him and last night you finally acted upon it.

You were in the bedroom packing your suitcase when Tae stepped out of the bathroom. He’d just taken a shower and was wearing nothing more than a towel wrapped loosely around his waist, the white of the fabric making his honey skin all the more radiant. His hair was wet and shaggy and dripping down onto his shoulders and chest. As you watched a single bead of water trail between his pecs and then down his stomach, you felt a desire for him like never before in your life.

Usually, he was the one who was in charge when you were intimate, a slightly aggressive and dominant side coming out a bit like it did when he was on stage. He always took care of you first and scolded you if you tried to touch him while he was pleasuring you. Only after you came would he let the focus shift to himself, and afterwards would usually insist on making you come again. Tonight, though, you wanted to be in charge.

He noticed you were staring at him, the smug smirk he wore telling you that he knew you were likely having some unprofessional thoughts, but before he could say anything, you suddenly strode over to him and captured his lips. As you deepened the kiss, he fought for control, but you didn’t let him have it. Instead, you gave his lower lip a teasing bite, broke the kiss, and then whispered in his ear that you wanted to show him how much you loved him. You then explained how you wanted to do it, gently sucking on his earlobe afterwards for emphasis.

He swore under his breath as his grip on your hips tightened, clearly both flustered and aroused by what you’d said. He hesitantly asked if you were sure, saying that he didn’t want you to do anything you weren’t comfortable with. You said you were absolutely positive, that you truly wanted to be with him like this, and asked if he wanted it too. He leaned his forehead against yours and said, ‘Yes, Jagi. Please.’, the desire and desperation in his voice unmistakable.

As you began kissing down his neck, you unwrapped the towel, letting it fall to the floor as you took him in your hand. You continued down his chest while slowly backing him towards the bed. When you reached the trail of hair on his lower abdomen, you sat him down on the edge of the bed. He placed a pillow on the floor at his feet and you knelt down on it between his legs.

After teasing him for a minute with little kisses and swirls of your tongue, you finally took him in your mouth, drawing the most delicious groan from him. You wrapped your hand around what your mouth couldn’t reach and began showing him just how much you loved and desired him.

When you were with your college boyfriend, doing this had always felt a bit embarrassing and honestly somewhat degrading. He just wasn’t very encouraging, and didn’t really engage with you, so you never felt comfortable or appreciated when you did it. With Tae, though, you felt the complete opposite. With him you felt confident and sexy and like you were being worshipped even though you were the one on your knees. With him it just felt so much more meaningful and intimate, like you were doing it with him instead of just to him.

He touched you with reverence and adoration, softly stroking your cheek and gently running his hands through your hair. His praise was passionate and affectionate; he told you over and over again that you were beautiful and perfect and incredible, that it felt so good, that you felt so good. When the words ‘I love you so much’ fell from his lips in a deep, breathy voice, you knew without question that he said them not just because it was the heat of the moment, but because he truly meant them.

Not long after that he told you it just felt too good, that he couldn’t last any longer. When you didn’t stop or pull away, letting him know you wanted what he was about to give, he finally fell apart for you. Within seconds of you both recovering, he lifted you up and kissed you so fiercely that he literally stole your breath. When he released your lips a moment later, he begged for you to let him show you how much he loved you too, like he couldn’t bear the idea of not able to give you what you’d just given him. You said ‘Yes’ without hesitation and he then laid you down and covered your body with his.

After gently pulling your tank top up and over your head, he captured your lips in a hungry kiss before he began trailing his lips downwards. He kissed all the way down to your stomach, coming tantalizingly close to the top of your shorts, but then removed his lips from you at the last second. As he then began kissing up your inner thigh, he slowly pulled your shorts down until you were completely bare before him. He looked up at you once more to ensure you were still OK with what he was doing, gave a final teasing kiss to each inner thigh, and then brought his mouth where you wanted it most.

The few times you’d previously experienced this were honestly not that enjoyable, however, you realized at once how much of a difference it made to have a partner who was enthusiastic and committed to making you feel good. Within a minute, Tae had you gripping the sheets, an endless string of breathy curses falling from your lips. Overwhelmed by the pleasure, your legs instinctively began closing, but he held them open with his big hands, his thumbs rubbing your inner thighs in a gentle, soothing way that was in such stark contrast to how he was devouring you with his mouth.

You understood immediately that all the subtly seductive lip bites and licks he’d given the camera over the years, and all the more vulgar tongue gestures he’d teased you with lately, had not just been for show. They were promises that he was now delivering on. None of the fantasies you’d had which featured him using his pretty mouth like this had done justice to his true and apparently natural talents. When it crossed your mind that this was the first time he was doing this and that he would only get better at it, you shuddered; it was already almost too much to handle.

For obvious reasons, he wasn’t able to serenade you with the filth he had come to discover you absolutely loved hearing, but then you were loud and filthy enough for the two of you. You returned the praise and encouragement he’d given you, saying with utter sincerity that he was incredible. Over the past week you had decided that Tae most definitely had a name kink and you fed into that fiercely, not even on purpose, but because your mind was full of nothing but thoughts of him and the sinful things he was doing with his tongue. When one of your hands suddenly latched onto his golden brown locks, he let out a low groan that you felt as much as you heard. The sensation of that alone almost had you coming undone.

When he eventually let go of one of your legs, and instead used that hand to add to your pleasure, you did lose it, the combination of his fingers and his tongue sending you into complete ecstasy. Once you finally stopped writhing in pleasure, Tae gave one final, gentle kiss and then came to lay beside you. He nervously asked if that felt good, as if you moaning his name loud enough for his rich and famous neighbors to hear wasn’t evidence enough, to which you breathlessly replied that it was amazing, that he was amazing. He also then said that he loved doing that for you, that he loved making you feel so good, and that he simply loved you.

You cuddled in bed for a while, your limbs tangled, not a scrap of clothing between you, before finally getting up, at which point Tae led you by the hand to the bathroom. He brought you into the shower with him where he proceeded to clean you, make you dirty all over again, and then clean you once more. By the time you two finally stopped canoodling, finished packing, and crawled into bed, you were both utterly, but blissfully exhausted.

You had been tempted to jump him again this morning when you woke up, but you fought the urge knowing there truly wasn’t enough time for such shenanigans given how early your flight was. Even after being on your best behavior all morning, the two of you were scrambling to get out the door on time. He had just gone through a final mental checklist of everything you both needed, and was about to open the apartment door, when he turned to you with a soft, ever so slightly sad expression on his face.

“I love you,” he said before wrapping you up in a big hug.

“I love you, too,” you said back, nuzzling your face into the crook of his neck.

After a minute of holding you tightly, he let go and brought his hands up to cup your cheeks. He leaned in and gave you a sweet, lingering kiss, one that you truly never wanted to end. You loved all of your kisses with Tae, but you were cherishing this one in particular because you knew it unfortunately might be a while until you got another one.

Even though you’d shared your first kiss, and spent the night together for the first time, in a hotel while on a BTS trip, you realized the circumstances that brought those things to fruition were unique and couldn’t be expected every time. The truth was, your month-long stay in America was going to be very different from the long weekend trip you took to film the Dynamite music video.

For starters, Big Hit had not rented out the entire hotel in New York City, where you would be spending the first half of the trip, or in LA, where you would be spending the second half. That increased the odds of being randomly spotted by fans or the media or, even worse, having another fiasco like what happened the night of The Grammys. However, being stalked by creepy paparazzi guys with cameras was honestly not what you two were most afraid of on this trip.

Because the guys would be going out for public appearances almost daily, it made sense to do some basic hair and makeup at the hotel itself before they left. To facilitate this, Big Hit had roomed both the guys and their stylists on one floor and then booked a massive suite down the hall that would serve as a prep room.

You and Tae had been in bed snuggling when you first found out about these plans via email. Initially, you were elated knowing you would be so close to one another. However, your excitement was short-lived once you read that all the managers would also be roomed on that floor. If everyone’s rooms were all clustered together like that, it would make it virtually impossible for you and Tae to go into each other’s rooms without someone seeing.

When it dawned on you that you might not be able to get much, if any, legitimate alone time with him, that you might have to go a whole month without him sleeping beside you, tears actually pooled in your eyes. You had only been together a month, and only been living together a little over a week, but already you two were so attached to one another.

When you were at the apartment together you were constantly touching, whether it was simply holding hands or cuddling on the couch or in bed. Tae was always wrapping his arms around your waist or planting random kisses on your forehead. You loved to gently comb your fingers through his hair and kiss the mole on the tip of his nose whenever he said something cute. The idea of going so long without being able to touch him in an affectionate or intimate way, or even just openly talk with him, made your heart hurt.

“Jagi, don’t cry,” he had said to you when he saw you were getting upset. “It will be OK.”

As he said that, though, he pulled you closer, up onto his chest, as if trying to get in all the physical contact he could before the long drought of it ahead.

~~~

Once the plane landed at JFK it was a bit of a blur getting to the hotel. The airport was so big and so busy, as was the city itself. It was honestly overwhelming and you were extremely grateful to know that all the logistics had already been arranged by the management team.

Tae and the rest of the guys got off the plane first so they could be taken through customs privately like usual. After that, they would be transported to the hotel separately for security reasons. You two texted constantly while you were both waiting to leave the airport and then traveling to the hotel, twelve hours having honestly been the longest you’d gone without talking to each other since the weekend of your big fight.

It was late afternoon by the time you finally got into your hotel room. It was nice, a lot nicer than the ones you were used to being given on trips. It had a king size bed, a giant flat screen TV mounted on the wall, a see-through mini fridge in the corner that was stocked with alcohol, and appeared to be furnished with rather high-end furniture and decorations. It did still have one of those slightly creepy doors leading to the adjacent room, but there were plenty of locks on it so you felt safe. All in all, you were rather pleased that this was where you would be staying for the next two weeks.

Exhausted from the long day of travel, you plopped down on the bed which you immediately discovered was incredibly comfortable. You then pulled out your phone to update Tae who had gotten into his room almost an hour ago.

[3:40 PM] I finally made it to my room.

[3:40 PM] I am so tired.

[3:41 PM] Would you judge me if I went to bed now?

[Taehyung 3:41 PM] No...as long as you let me come cuddle with you.

[Taehyung 3:42 PM] What room are you in?

As you read his text you felt a pang in your chest. You had largely accepted that you and Tae would not be able to visit each other, that it would be reckless to even try, but you weren’t sure he had. Him saying with such sincerity that he didn't think he could go a whole month sleeping without you in his arms had you swooning, but it also made you incredibly nervous that he would risk things to still try and be with you. As if sensing you were thinking about this right now, and preparing to shut him down, he texted again.

[Taehyung 3:45 PM] Jagi, I know you’re worried, but can we at least look at where our two rooms are and see if it’s possible?

[Taehyung 3:46 PM] Maybe we’re just across the hall from each other. We could make that work.

You took a deep breath, trying not to get your hopes up.

[3:46 PM] Room #815

[Taehyung 3:46 PM] …

[Taehyung 3:46 PM] Was that supposed to be a joke?

[3:47 PM] …no?

[3:47 PM] Why?

[Taehyung 3:47 PM] Text me a picture of the little envelope your key card came in that shows your room number.

You’re not sure why he thought you’d be lying, but you indulged him and snapped a photo of the envelope lying on the nightstand.

[3:48 PM] OK…

[3:48 PM] Image Sent

[Taehyung 3:48 PM] 😱

You were officially very confused, having absolutely no idea what that emoji was supposed to mean, but before you could text him back and ask, you heard a knock on your door. Getting up from the bed, you walked over to the door leading into the hallway, but when you opened it up no one was there. After closing it you walked back towards the bed, but stopped once you again heard knocking. This time, though, you realized the knocking wasn’t coming from the hallway door, it was coming from the door connecting to the adjacent room.

For a few moments you just stood there staring at it, your jaw nearly on the floor. The person knocking on that door couldn’t possibly be who you thought and hoped it was, but then you got another text proving otherwise.

[Taehyung 3:49 PM] It’s bad manners to keep a guest waiting at the door.

You called him immediately and he picked up before it could even ring once.

“Are you messing with me right now?” you demanded.

“Jagi, just open the door,” he said, barely containing the excitement in his voice.

With a shaky hand you undid the numerous locks, turned the doorknob, and slowly opened the door. There in front of you was Tae, still holding the phone up to his ear, the biggest, boxiest smile you’d ever seen him wearing in his entire life.

“Baby, how is this possible?” you whispered.

“I have no idea,” he replied, finally dropping his phone from his ear as he shook his head in disbelief.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 35 - kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.5k

warnings: heavy petting, fingering, some hot shower grinding

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Chapter 35: Honeymoon Phase - Part 1

For the next minute, the two of you just stood there staring at each other, trying to comprehend what was happening. There were a million thoughts running through your head, but you’d be lying if you said they were all positive. As thrilled as you were to see him standing just a few feet away from you, the suspicion welled up inside you almost immediately. You briefly tried to calculate the actual odds of your two rooms being next to each other, let alone adjoined, but you quickly abandoned that pursuit: the odds were slim, very slim.

“This can’t be a coincidence,” you finally said, giving him a dubious look.

“Our rooms being next to each other would have been one thing, but them being adjoined?” you questioned incredulously. “There’s just no way.”

His eyes searched yours as he considered your words and the situation as a whole. You knew that the hopeless romantic in him wanted to believe that it had happened by accident, that it was truly just fate, but eventually he let out a long sigh in obvious acceptance.

“You’re right,” he admitted. “This had to have been done on purpose.”

Just then something seemed to occur to him because he brought his phone back up and quickly made a call. Whoever he called answered right away and once he began explaining things you knew it must be Jimin on the line. He asked point blank if the other man had anything to do with your rooms, but it was clear from Tae’s expression that the answer was no. He thanked Jimin, said he’d let him know if we figured anything out, and then hung up shortly after.

“If it wasn’t Jimin then I honestly have no idea who else it could have been,” he said warily.

He took a step towards you as he spoke, but you instantly put up your hands and cautioned him to stop.

“What if this is some kind of trap?” you asked nervously.

“What if there are cameras in here?” you then added as the hairs on the back of your neck shot up.

“Jagi, I’m sure there aren’t any cameras,” he replied, however, even as he spoke his eyes did a quick scan of the room.

The idea that there were cameras in there was probably a bit ridiculous, but the whole situation had your anxiety through the roof and you weren’t thinking straight.

“Tae, someone knows,” you said in a hushed, shaky voice.

He knew you were right, you could see the acknowledgement of this fact written on his face clear as day. However, unlike you, he wasn’t freaking out about it. On the contrary, with each passing second he seemed to grow calmer.

“I think whoever knows is on our side,” he eventually said, giving you the smallest of smiles.

“I don’t think they’re trying to trick us,” he went on optimistically. “I think they’re trying to help us.”

As he said this he stepped forward again and this time you didn't stop him. You let him gather you in his arms, relaxing into his embrace and resting your head on his chest. What he said did make sense. If the wrong person knew about you two, they would have had you fired, not done something that would allow you to keep seeing each other and continuing hiding your relationship. It still made you feel incredibly uneasy to not know who exactly it was who knew, but you took a small amount of comfort knowing they had chosen to keep your secret.

“So, what do we do now?” you hesitantly asked after a few moments.

“I think we just make the most of it,” he replied, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “We accept their help and be happy that we can be together.”

~~~

At first you were still very much on edge, not entirely convinced that it wasn’t some kind of trap or that things weren’t going to go horribly wrong. Anytime you went into each other’s rooms, you kept waiting for someone to barge in and catch you. It took you forever to fall asleep each night because you kept imagining that you would wake up to someone looking down on the two of you snuggled together. Whenever you guys left for the day, you double and triple checked that the connecting doors were both fully locked, making Tae text you a picture of his. You even went so far as to move a chair in front of yours to make it abundantly clear that you weren’t opening it. That was probably overkill, it was rare that anyone ever came into your room on trips, but you still just didn’t want to take any chances.

After a few days, though, once nothing bad had happened and no one said anything or acted strangely towards you two, you slowly began to relax. You stopped jumping every time you heard voices in the hall and being paranoid every time someone casually asked how you slept last night. By the time you left New York halfway through the trip, you had fully accepted that whoever did this was, in fact, on your side. There was just no other explanation for why they would help you other than that they supported your relationship. And, when you two once again found yourselves in adjoining rooms in your hotel in LA, the only emotion you felt was gratitude for who Tae lovingly referred to as your guardian angel.

You were convinced it was another one of the guys, but both Tae and Jimin weren’t sure about that. They didn’t think one of them would be able to hide something like this so well or even know how to pull it off for that matter. If it wasn’t one of them, though, that meant it was another member of the staff which seemed even more unlikely. Why anyone who was subjected to the same rules as you would willingly help you break them was beyond you. You desperately wanted to know who it was, but Tae felt sure that this person would eventually reveal themselves to you and thought that, until then, you two should just play it cool.

So, that’s what you did. You played it cool, tried to relax, and let yourself be happy.

Every day there was usually only one event which took up either the morning or the evening. That left a good portion of the day free, far more time than you’d actually gotten back home. Occasionally, Tae did stuff with the guys and you went out with the other stylists so as not to draw too much attention, but mostly you hung out together in your rooms. If you had been cooped up with anyone else like that you had no doubt you would have gotten bored, bitten their head off, or lost your mind entirely, but with Tae there was never a dull moment and you truly enjoyed every second you spent with him.

You ordered room service and had yourselves little ‘dates’. Usually you were super casual and lazy and just wore pajamas, but one night you dressed up in real people clothes which was fun. Several times Tae tried to be adventurous and ordered one of the funky menu items he’d never heard of before, but each time he ended up deeming the food inedible and eating half of your meal. One morning you had breakfast in bed which was very relaxing and quite romantic until he spilled maple syrup all over the comforter. In the process of scolding him for not being more careful, you smeared strawberry jam on your favorite oversized sleep shirt. Tae keeled over with laughter, calling it poetic justice, and after that you decided strawberry jam was the devil and breakfast was probably best eaten at the table.

You read through Twitter and Weverse together to see what everyone thought of the performances they gave on all the different American TV shows. The feedback was overwhelmingly positive, especially for Tae which made you so proud. ARMY absolutely loved his performances in ‘Dynamite’. Everything about the disco pop track just suited him so well - the funky dance moves, the retro outfits, even the hilariously nonsensical, but undeniably catchy lyrics. They loved his ad libs and the unique flare he gave to each performance and also thought he was the perfect ending fairy. In ‘Life Goes On’, they praised him for his soothing, angelic voice and decided that, with each new performance, he looked more and more like a real life prince charming. The fact that he always got so shy when he saw people complimenting him was so endearing and only made you love him more.

You started binge watching K-Dramas on Netflix, your favorite one being ‘Crash Landing on You’. The storyline was simply too apropos for you not to love: a man and a woman from very different backgrounds who were not, under any circumstances, supposed to have fallen in love, but did anyway and, despite enduring many hardships, wound up together in the end. Once you finished watching the last episode, Tae declared that one day, once neither of you were under contract with Big Hit, he would write a K-Drama depicting your love story. You casually, though somewhat nervously, asked him how he thought your story would end, but he replied right away with confidence that your story would end happily ever after which brought the biggest smile to your face.

One night, while you two were in bed watching one of the episodes, you were sitting between his legs with your back resting against his chest when you felt him start softly running his hands through your hair. He did this all the time, so at first you thought nothing of it, but then his movements began to feel a little less random and a bit more intentional.

“What are you doing back there?” you asked curiously.

“Nothing,” he said all innocently. “Just watch the show, Jagi.”

You turned your attention back to the TV, but a small smile crept onto your face a minute later when you realized what he was doing.

“Tae,” you started with a laugh. “Are you doing my hair?”

“Tonight I will be the stylist noona,” he said in the most adorable voice you’d ever heard.

An enormous laugh escaped you at him referring to himself as a noona, but you settled down a moment later to let him continue working. You knew at once how he was styling your hair, the way he first parted it down the middle and then casually asked if he could borrow your two hair ties being a dead giveaway. As he was gathering up the first side, and failing miserably at getting all the strands evenly, you were trying so hard to keep it together. The other side seemed to go a bit more smoothly, though, you could instantly feel the obvious asymmetry.

Once he was finished he turned you around to admire his handiwork. He seemed rather pleased with himself, a small giggle escaping him before a massive smile spread across his face.

“Do I get to see now?” you asked with a hesitant laugh.

“Yes, my work here is complete,” he replied smugly.

You moved to get up from the bed and go to the mirror, but he snuck his arms around your waist and whined that you weren’t allowed to leave him. He then pulled out his phone, opened up the front-facing camera, and held it out in front of you both. The moment you saw yourself pop up on the screen you nearly died of laughter. The pigtails looked ridiculous. They were uneven, both in size and location; the larger one sat just above your ear and was very droopy while the smaller one was much higher up and sticking straight out. The idea of being photographed like this was mortifying, but before you could even protest he had snapped a picture. In it, you were looking forward at the camera, your eyes squinty and mouth open mid-laugh, while Tae was turned sideways, pretending to chomp on one of the pigtails.

The photo was silly and adorable and totally chaotic, the perfect encapsulation of your relationship. You loved it, absolutely loved it, especially once a certain realization hit you.

“This is the first photo we’ve ever taken together,” you said shyly.

“You’re right, it is,” he said thoughtfully as he saved the photo and put down his phone.

“I wish I could make it my background,” he then added as he began twirling your pigtails between his fingers. “Then I could look at how cute you are all the time.”

You let out a long sigh. For some reason it was things like this, the tiny gestures of affection you were denied from giving each other, that always seemed to get to you the most.

“One day, Jagi,” he promised, knowing exactly what you were feeling at that moment. “One day we won’t have to hide.”

In addition to sharing little tender moments like that, you also had your fair share of steamy ones. The very first day, once you had finally caved and let Tae come cuddle with you in your room, he had reminded you of the last time you two were together in a hotel bed. He insisted that he needed to finish what he started that day and before you knew it he rolled over on top of you, brought his thigh between your legs, and started grinding into you. This time around, he knew exactly what you liked, how fast to go, what dirty things to whisper in your ear, and it wasn’t long before he had you coming undone. You might have been embarrassed at how easily he got you off like that were it not for the fact that, when you flipped over, straddled him, and began rolling your hips, he hadn’t lasted much longer.

You two had showered together after that, having loved doing it the night before, and proceeded to do so almost every day for the rest of the trip. Sometimes you truly just cleaned each other, simply enjoying the feeling of being so close, but more often than not you ended up touching each other more intimately. The shower surprisingly brought out Tae’s duality to an extent which you had not previously seen. One second he would have you laughing hysterically after shampooing his hair and spiking it up into horns, but the next second he would have you biting back a moan after pressing you up against the wall and caressing your body with his hands and lips.

One evening as he was gently washing you, he wrapped his arms around you from behind and pulled you flush against him. You could feel every inch of him burning with desire and you had half a mind to ask him to take you right then and there. Thankfully you didn't; for starters you had no protection and also, as hot as it might be to do it in the shower, you wanted your first time together to be more special than that.

You did, however, begin slowly grinding against him, the body wash he’d just lathered you up with making your movements smooth as you slid over him. He started moving in sync with you, holding you tightly to him with one hand as he gently thrust his hips, and lowered his other hand to begin pleasuring you with the same rhythm. It was by far the most intimate experience you’d ever shared, your bodies moving together like that so sensually, and when you came together for the first time not long after, you knew with absolute certainty you were ready to give yourself to him entirely. 

What you felt in the shower he must have felt too because later that night, as you were cuddling before falling asleep, he told you that he wanted to make love to you. Turning in his arms to face him, you told him you wanted that too, more than anything. He kissed you then, slow and deep, and for a moment you thought it was going to happen right there, but then he broke the kiss and told you he wanted to wait until you got back from the trip. He said he wanted your first time together to be at home in your shared bed where he could make it romantic and memorable and not in a random hotel room on the other side of the world that you would never visit again. You couldn’t help but swoon; the fact that he also wanted your first time together to be special made you feel more ready than ever to take that step with him. You easily agreed to wait, though, the many other ways you could pleasure each other and express your love being more than enough to keep you satiated in the meantime. 

The entire trip honestly felt like a vacation of sorts to commemorate what was clearly the honeymoon phase of your relationship. The fact that you weren’t able to interact as a couple outside of the two pairs of hotel rooms you stayed in didn’t matter in the slightest. You were spending time together, getting closer, and making memories, all while continuing to successfully do your respective jobs and hide your relationship. It was obviously still less than an ideal situation, but it was infinitely more than you thought you were going to get which you were extremely grateful for.

Near the end of your second week in LA, you and Tae were both feeling significantly more optimistic about the future of your relationship and, more importantly, your ability to keep it secret. If things just stayed like this, if you two kept being careful and your guardian angel kept helping out, you were confident that you could make it work.

~~~

It was the night of the last event of the tour, and the second to last night of your trip, and you were with Tae backstage on the set of The Late Late Show with James Corden. The guys had just performed ‘Dynamite’ and ‘Life Goes On’ and were getting ready to go back out for the interview portion of the show. Tae was already changed and you were just doing a few last minute touch ups before it was time to go.

In preparation for the interview, he had memorized a bunch of things to say in English and he was practicing them in front of the mirror. You had no idea what he was saying, or if he was even saying it correctly, but every now and then he would get a little tongue-tied, his face twisting up into an adorable pout before he started over. You could tell he was nervous; he always was whenever he was about to speak English, especially if he was going to be doing it live like tonight. As you stood there watching him, mindlessly giving his hair a few last minute fluffs, you could not help but break out into a little smile.

“What?” he asked a few moments later when he finally noticed you had been watching him.

“Nothing,” you replied casually, meeting his gaze through the mirror.

“Tell me,” he said with a little whine, the pout back, this time accompanied by his puppy dog eyes.

“It’s just...you’re so cute when you’re nervous,” you said quietly, only loud enough for him to hear.

At that his face broke out into a big, silly grin. He was about to say something back when suddenly the show’s production manager entered the room and announced that it was time to head onto the set. You wished him luck and said a quick goodbye as he started walking out the door with the other guys. Just as he was out of sight, and you began packing up your things, you felt a buzz in your pocket. Pulling out your phone, you were met with a short, but sweet message.

[Taehyung 9:55 PM] You’re always cute, Jagi.

The first part of the interview went great. Namjoon did a fair amount of the talking, as expected, but James made sure to direct questions to the other guys too. They seemed to understand most of what he asked and when they didn’t Namjoon quickly translated. Tae got to speak a couple times and you instantly recognized the phrases you had heard him practicing. You couldn’t tell if he said them perfectly or not, but he said them without stumbling and gave a big smile afterwards which you took as a good sign.

The second part of the interview was a game of sorts where James would go around holding up a letter to each member and they had to say the first word that came to mind that started with it. Feeling confident enough in their English vocabulary, and knowing the romanization of many Korean words, the guys had agreed ahead of time to play with the English alphabet.

During the first round everyone got letters with pretty obvious English answers, ones that even you could give: Hobi said ‘Dynamite’ for ‘D’, Jin shouted ‘Fighting’ for ‘F’, Namjoon said ‘ARMY’ for ‘A’, Jimin said ‘Papa Mochi’ for ‘P’, Jungkook yelled ‘Rrrrrrrrap Monster’, for ‘R’, and Yoongi said ‘Grammy for ‘G’. The first letter Tae got was ‘Y’, which you decided simply couldn’t be a coincidence; he said ‘Yeontan’ right away with a shy smile and the whole audience cooed.

They went around the circle twice more shouting things out, the answers becoming a mixture of English and Korean words, most of which were BTS-related like ‘maknae’ for ‘M’, ‘EatJin’ for ‘E’ and ‘borahae’ or ‘B’. You were smiling from ear to ear by the time it was Tae’s turn for the third time, loving to see them all looking so comfortable and having fun, but the moment you saw his letter you immediately felt your heart seize and saw the last four blissful weeks flash before your eyes.

J

You recognized that letter right away and knew the exact sound it made: four of the guy’s stage names started with it. Tae could have said Jimin or Jungkook or Jin or J-Hope. He could have said James Corden or have been cheeky and said Jimmy Fallon, who’s show they had been on just two weeks prior. He also could have said any number of other things which you knew started with this letter like their songs ‘Jump’ or ‘Jamais Vu’ or his favorite food, japchae. But, he didn’t say any of those words. Instead, he said the one word he most definitely should not have said.

Jagi

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 36 | kth (m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.6k

warnings: cursing

Chapter 36: Honeymoon Phase - Part 2

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Tae knew he’d made a mistake almost instantly, his smile faltering and his eyes going slightly wide as the realization hit him that he had just accidentally uttered, on live TV, a word only meant to be spoken between lovers. The other guys were clearly taken aback, some simply raising their eyebrows questioningly while others wore expressions of legitimate surprise. The few people in the audience who knew what the word meant let out a mixture of ‘awwws’ and squeals and gasps. Backstage, where you were watching along on the monitors with some of the other staff members, a wave of murmurs rippled through the group.

You stood there in stunned silence, your eyes glued to the screen as you waited with baited breath to see what happened next. For a heart stopping moment, no one said or did anything, but then suddenly Namjoon smiled and started to laugh.

“You’re not going to let me live that down, are you?” he said jokingly as he turned in his seat to face Tae.

At first, Tae just stared back at the older man blankly, but then his face broke out into a hesitant grin once he realized what Namjoon was doing.

“The other day my phone autocorrected something and I accidentally called him ‘Jagi’,” Namjoon went on embarrassedly, glancing around at the other guys as he spoke. “He swore he would never bring it up ever again, but apparently he lied.”

Whether they bought the lie or knew enough to just go along with whatever Namjoon said, you didn’t know, but the rest of the guys immediately broke out into what sounded like genuine laughter.

“I’ve been telling you guys for years that I’m hyung’s favorite,” Tae said with a smirk, now fully on board with Namjoon’s cover up.

“I thought I was hyung’s favorite,” Jungkook suddenly whined from the corner of the couch they were all sitting on.

“You’ve been replaced,” Tae said teasingly, batting his eyelashes and pouring on the charm.

“You too, Jimin,” he then added, turning to the man next to him with an adorable pout. “I apparently have a new soulmate.”

As another round of laughter broke out amongst the guys, everyone backstage joined in as well, people now fondly saying things like ‘I can’t with these boys’ and ‘Classic Bangtan’. Namjoon then turned back to James and started talking in English, no doubt to explain the situation. James immediately started laughing, as did the audience.

You, however, were not laughing. You were slowly releasing the breath you had been holding and trying not to let your heart thump right out of your chest.

Fuck we just dodged a bullet

You shuddered to think what would have happened had Namjoon not been able to think on his feet so quickly. As the leader of BTS, he was always on alert for situations like this and had, on more than one occasion, bailed Tae and the other guys out after they let something slip. The fact that he reacted immediately, and didn’t seem nearly as surprised as the other guys by what Tae had said, made sense given that he had recently asked Jimin if Tae was dating someone. The question now, though, was whether or not he knew that someone was you .

The game ended shortly thereafter which concluded their whole segment on the show. Once they said their goodbyes and the cameras stopped filming, the guys left the stage and began filing back into the prep room. They were all talking amongst themselves, Jin and Hobi still laughing about the ‘Jagi’ autocorrect incident which made you think they believed it had actually happened.

Tae came in last, a mixture of guilt and relief clearly written on his face. As he began walking over to you just like he always did after shows, you felt an unbelievable urge to throw your arms around him, to hold him tight and never let go. You almost did, almost couldn’t physically restrain yourself, but just as he was about to reach you someone suddenly spoke up behind you.

“Taehyung,” you heard Manager Sejin say sternly. “A word please.”

You felt your blood run cold as Tae walked by you, shooting you the briefest sideways glance before he followed Manager Sejin into the guys dressing room. As you watched the door close behind him you got a terrible sinking feeling in your stomach.

Maybe I spoke too soon

~~~

It was well after midnight when you finally got into your room and you still had not talked to Tae. He hadn’t come back out of the guy’s dressing room before you and the rest of the staff were told to get on the bus to head back to the hotel. You had been dying to text him all evening, but you were afraid he might still be with Manager Sejin so you hadn’t sent any messages. Hoping he would say something soon, you changed into your pajamas, got into bed, and waited.

To distract yourself from your ever growing anxiety, you opened up Twitter. There on your feed was clip after clip after clip of Tae and Namjoon’s exchange from the show along with cheeky captions such as ‘Autocorrect my ass. Namjoon is swooning like the rest of us’ and ‘Taehyung is a tease and flirt. What else is new’. ‘Jagi’ was also trending as was ‘TaeJoon’ and ‘Hyung’s Favorite’. You allowed yourself to relax ever so slightly; if ARMY, who saw and knew everything , bought Namjoon’s cover story that was definitely a good sign.

Just then, you heard a knock on the door leading to Tae’s room. Ecstatic to finally hear from him, you leapt out of bed, rushed to the door, undid it’s numerous locks, and yanked it open. In front of you stood a tall, handsome man...who was not Kim Taehyung.

“Taehyung sent me to talk to you,” Namjoon said calmly. “He’s still with Sejin and the other managers, but his phone is dead and he didn’t want you to worry.”

You stood there frozen, eyes wide, unable to form a coherent thought. Despite what he had just said, your first instinct was to shut the door and hide. You subconsciously began closing it, but Namjoon reached out and gently stopped you.

“Y/N, it’s OK,” he said, giving you a warm smile. “I know.”

There were a million questions you wanted to ask him about how and when he found out and what he planned to do about it, but right now there was only one thing that truly mattered.

“Do they know?” you asked, your voice trembling.

“No, they don’t,” Namjoon replied reassuringly.

Upon hearing his words, the vice that had been squeezing your lungs since the moment Manager Sejin called Taehyung’s name finally loosened.

“They don’t suspect he is dating you or anyone else,” he went on. “But, they are extremely upset with him for making what they think was a very reckless and inappropriate joke.”

“As I am sure you realized, ‘Jagi’ being the first word that came to mind for him is problematic if people think it's because he’s used to saying it and is therefore in a relationship,” he then continued. “The managers think it was careless and disrespectful of him to even jokingly mention it knowing how it could be taken and that it could cause a scandal for BTS and put people’s actual relationships in jeopardy.”

“They are accusing him of doing it just for attention,” he added with a grimace. “They think he did it knowing it will get ARMY riled up and talking about him.”

It made your heart hurt to think of Tae sitting in a room right now getting yelled at for something he didn’t even do, to have people that he deeply respects honestly thinking he would be so selfish.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make him look bad,” Namjoon then said sheepishly as if reading your thoughts. “It was just the first thing that I thought of and I knew I couldn’t afford to hesitate.”

“Please don’t apologize,” you said quickly. “I’m so grateful that you were there to help us.”

As you said those words, a realization suddenly washed over you and what had once just been a hunch now seemed so abundantly clear.

“I’m grateful for all of your help,” you then added quietly, gesturing around the room.

The bashful smile he now wore was all the confirmation you needed to know you were right: Namjoon was yours and Tae’s guardian angel, in more ways than one you realized.

“How did you do it?” you asked in bewilderment.

He hesitated for a moment, a tiny, mischievous smirk spreading across his face.

“Whenever we travel anywhere my room always has an adjoining one,” he admitted slowly. “So that Aera can secretly stay with me.”

Your mouth dropped open at his admission. Bringing a significant other on official BTS trips was absolutely against the rules. The fact that Namjoon, the group’s leader, was so boldly breaking them was shocking, but somehow also completely unsurprising.

“She usually doesn’t stay the whole time,” he explained. “But, she will come and visit for a few weeks at a time depending on how long we’re there.”

“She works remotely so she stays busy during the day and then we spend the evenings together,” he went on. “It’s obviously less than ideal, but it’s better than being away from each other for months at a time.”

“No one else knows about this,” he then added. “And, I mean no one.”

“How,” you began, looking at him in astonishment. “How have you managed to do this?”

“A good magician never reveals his secrets,” he said with a laugh before adding more seriously. “But, let’s just say it’s not as difficult as you think to hack into Big Hit’s management software.”

Hacking into the system of a multi-billion dollar company certainly sounded difficult, if not impossible, but, then again, Namjoon was a legitimate genius.

“Aera unfortunately wasn’t able to come this time, so I made a quick change and gave you two our rooms instead,” he then added.

For a couple seconds you just stood there looking at him, trying to summon the courage to ask the burning question.

“Why?” you then questioned hesitantly.

You got the sense that he understood the greater implication of your question. You weren’t just asking why he had given you two the adjoined rooms. You were asking why he was supporting your complicated, illegal relationship, why he thought it was worth breaking the rules and risking a scandal to help you two to be together. He was quiet for several moments, a thoughtful expression on his face as he studied you with a soft gaze, before finally giving a surprising reply.

“Aera is my rock,” he said with a tenderness that instantly melted your heart. “She is my calm in the eye of the storm and my solid ground when I’m drowning.”

“She is the reason I have made it this far with my health and sanity intact,” he added with a small laugh. “Why I didn’t give up years ago.”

“She is the inspiration for so many of the lyrics I write,” he continued, smiling fondly.

“But, most importantly, she is the reason why anything I do has any meaning at all,” he said softly, a light blush dusting his cheeks. “She is my everything.”

His words were so beautiful and moving that by the time he had finished speaking tears had pooled in your eyes. When he said his next words, though, those tears finally began to slide down your cheeks.

“You are Taehyung’s everything,” he said gently, giving you another warm smile.  

“That much has always been clear to me,” he went on. “Not just from the way he looks at you, but the way he looks for you in every crowded room. The way he talks to you and, even more so, the way he talks about you. They way he’s drawn to you and how he grows calmer and more confident in your presence. The fact that he’s truly become a better man since he met you.”

“Y/N, I have known Taehyung for almost 10 years and I have never seen him happier than he has been these last few months,” he continued, his smile growing wider as he spoke.

“I know the situation is challenging and stressful, and I’m not going to pretend like I have all the answers or know how everything will end up, but you have my word that I will do everything I can to support you two right now,” he then said finally.

You were so unbelievably touched by everything he had said that for a moment you were rendered speechless. The kindness and generosity he had shown both you and Tae was truly remarkable; you felt so honored to call such a wonderful person your friend.

“Thank you,” you finally managed to say. “From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he replied kindly.

For the first time all night, you found yourself honestly believing that everything was going to be OK. Knowing that you and Tae had someone like this in your corner made the burden you’d been carrying for months feel so much lighter. It wasn’t easy, trying to build a life together like this, but with real support you felt like you could do it.

After taking a moment to compose yourself, you cleared your throat and spoke up again.

“Do you have any idea when Tae might be back?” you asked somewhat anxiously.

“I imagine soon,” he replied. “They were just waiting to hear back from Bang PD when I left. There was some important Big Hit meeting going on back in Seoul so he couldn’t be reached when they first called.”

As if by fate, you heard the door to Tae’s room open at that exact moment. You stepped past Namjoon into the room and the instant the door was closed, you ran to Tae, launching yourself into his open arms. Suddenly, he was hugging you so tightly you could hardly breathe, but you didn’t care. He was all you needed; he was your air.

It was only now that you were back safely in his arms that you realized just how terrified you’d been of losing him. The tears came immediately and before you knew it you were sobbing into his chest, clutching his shirt and trying to pull him impossibly close. He was crying too, just as hard as you, if not harder, as he slowly rocked you back and forth in his arms.

“I’m sorry, Jagi,” he said between muffled sobs. “I’m so sorry.”

“Baby, it’s OK,” you cried back. “It was just an accident.”

“But, everything is going to be OK,” you added gently.

When you said that, though, he only seemed to cry harder, his whole body shaking as sob after sob tore through him.

“N-No it’s not,” he said almost incoherently.

“It is,” you assured him soothingly. “We’ll be OK.”

He tried to say something else, but it was swallowed by another heartbreaking sob. It was starting to frighten you now, how inconsolable he was. You understood he felt guilty for the slip up, and was probably upset after being yelled at for several hours, but you couldn’t help worry that something else was wrong.

“Tae, what happened?” you asked shakily, pulling back to look at him.

You reached up and took his face in your hands, trying to get him to look you in the eyes, but he kept his eyes trained down on the floor.

“Tae,” you whispered, rubbing away his tears with your thumbs as the fear inside you grew. “Please talk to me.”

It took him several minutes to calm down enough so that he could speak and even then his voice still wavered and broke over every other word.

“Bang PD finally called,” he breathed out.

You felt your stomach drop at how scared he looked and sounded right now.

“He wants to meet as soon as we get back,” he then said quietly, his voice catching.

Your heart was breaking, absolutely shattering, as you waited for him to continue.

“So we can discuss the relationship I’ve clearly been hiding,” he finally whispered before another great heaving sob left him.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 37 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.3k

warnings: fingering, oral sex (F receiving), protected sex

Chapter 37: Live In The Moment

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The relationship I’ve clearly been hiding

Tae said those words and your heart stopped. You two were so close to getting out of this mess unscathed, so close, but now here you were at the very last second getting the rug pulled out from under you. And it was devastating, the fact that you’d allowed yourself to truly believe everything would be OK making the pain infinitely worse.

Of course Bang PD had seen the truth. He was practically a second father to the guys and had probably spent more time with them than their own fathers during the last seven years. Knowing them all like the back of his hand, he told Tae that he instantly knew both he and Namjoon were lying when he watched the video. He didn't believe for a second that Tae would be selfish enough to make such a joke and recognized Namjoon’s cover up right away, having been the one to personally coach the group’s leader on how to handle those exact types of situations.

Turns out he had also noted Tae’s recent change in demeanor, suspecting a relationship might be the cause, and the ‘Jagi’ slip-up was what finally convinced him that he was right. Bang PD had thankfully given no indication that he knew who Tae was dating, but surely that would be the first question he asked when they met.

Namjoon excused himself shortly after Tae finished recounting his call with Bang PD, promising to talk through things with you two and try to come up with a plan in the morning. You had pulled yourselves together long enough to say goodbye to him, and also thank him once more for all of his generosity and support, but the moment the door closed behind him you both broke down again, even worse than before. Laying down together on Tae’s bed, you held each other and cried until there were no more tears left to cry.

Through your sobs, you tried to comfort Tae, who was beside himself with guilt over what he had done. He kept apologizing over and over again, saying he was sorry for letting you down and ruining everything and being the reason you were crying right now. Seeing him beat himself up like that broke your heart and only made you cry harder. It was just an accident, an innocent mistake, and you hated that he was blaming himself like he’d purposefully done something to hurt you.

You tried your best to convince him that it would be OK, that you could figure out a way forward, but in your heart you didn’t even believe the words you were saying. Tae was contractually obligated to disclose to Big Hit any relationships he was in for legal and security purposes. If he went into that meeting and refused to give any information about his relationship, Bang PD and the other managers would immediately start asking even more questions and looking into things more closely. After that, it would only be a matter of time before someone figured it out.

As you laid in each other’s arms that night, sleep finding neither of you, the heartbreaking truth hung between you like smog: there really was no way out of this; you were trapped and everything was surely about to come crashing down.

~~~

Two days later you found yourself back at home, laying in bed, trying to calm your racing heart. During the plane ride home you had thought long and hard about everything and had come to an incredibly difficult decision about what needed to be done to salvage yours and Tae’s relationship and careers. Tonight, the night before his meeting with Bang PD, you were going to tell him.

You two had talked with Namjoon the day after the show back in LA, but the older man unfortunately did not have good news. Bang PD had called him earlier that morning asking what he knew and when he knew it and why he hadn’t come forward with this important information. Not wanting to say anything before speaking with you and Tae, he had simply responded by saying it was not his place to discuss Tae’s private life. The Big Hit CEO had not been happy with that response, stating it was Namjoon’s responsibility as the group’s leader to help keep everyone in line, but he eventually stopped pushing once he realized Namjoon wasn’t going to talk.

Ultimately, the best option you three came up with was for Tae to say he had ended his relationship following the incident on the show. He would claim that things had been rocky beforehand and that the stress of what had happened was just too much. In all honesty, the likelihood that they believed the relationship to truly be over was slim and, even if they did, they might still want information for legal reasons. You all knew it was a shaky plan at best, but your options were few and far between.

Later that night, as you began the long journey home, a sobering realization hit you: it wasn’t just your career that was in jeopardy anymore, Tae’s was as well now. You two had been so focused on the idea of you getting fired that you hadn’t stopped to really consider the consequences for Tae. It was unlikely he would ever get fired, he was too valuable to BTS and Big Hit for that to happen, but he could be legitimately disciplined and his reputation could be tarnished. The fact was he had broken numerous rules in his own contract over the last few months by secretly being with you and had made many people who once trusted and respected him start to question him and his morals.

As the plane hurtled through the night sky, you couldn’t stop the guilt from welling up inside you. He was breaking his contract because of you. He was in trouble with Bang PD and the other managers because of you. The whole incident on the show was your fault. You’d been flirting with him moments before he went out on stage, acting like his girlfriend instead of like his stylist. You were the reason he was distracted heading into the interview, the reason why he slipped up and said what he said in the first place.

The harsh truth that you finally came to accept somewhere over the Pacific Ocean was that what happened was precisely why the rules forbidding relationships between staff and the guys existed. Your relationship was compromising your ability to successfully do your job. Your very presence on set was a liability for Tae and BTS and Big Hit.

By the time the plane landed back in Seoul it was clear to you what needed to be done. You did your best to act normal throughout the day, citing jet lag for the quietness Tae noted, but now, on the eve of his meeting with Bang PD, you knew it was time to tell him your decision.

When he climbed into bed and settled behind you a little while later, you felt your heart constrict; the conversation you were about to have was going to be devastating for him. He wrapped his arm around you and pulled you to his chest, his warm hand resting on your waist. For a few minutes neither of you spoke. You just laid there trying to gather your thoughts and your courage while he placed light kisses from your shoulder to your neck.

“Talk to me, Jagi,” he said softly. “You’ve been so quiet since we got home.”

“Please tell me what you’re thinking about,” he continued, hugging you to him more tightly.

You closed your eyes and took a deep, steadying breath before responding.

“I think I should leave Big Hit,” you said quietly.

“What?” he breathed out, his body going rigid.

“I think you should tell Bang PD the truth and I should leave and go work somewhere else,” you continued shakily. “You’re in enough trouble as it is and if you go in there and lie tomorrow things are only going to get worse for you.”

“Jagi, no. You can’t give up your job,” he said firmly. “You love what you do and you’ve worked so hard to get where you are.”

“And, if you left,” he then added, his voice now thick with emotion. “We would hardly ever see each other.”

You couldn’t stop tears from filling your eyes as he said those words because you knew he was right. Over the last month you had spent more time with him than ever before, which was amazing, but if you didn't work at Big Hit all that time spent together would have been time spent apart.

“We would still live together,” you replied, trying to convince yourself that it would be enough. “We’d still see each other at night and on the weekends.”

“What about when it gets busy and I’m not home until really late? Or when we are required to stay at the dorms for weeks at a time? What about all the weekends I’ll be away for shoots and shows?” he questioned, his voice wavering. “What about when we go on tour and I’m gone for three or four months?”

To that you had no response. You would be heartbroken to be away from him so much, to be left behind in your empty home that wouldn’t truly be home without him in it.

“Jagi, I can’t be away from you for that long,” he then said sadly. “I missed you on the plane ride home and that was only 12 hours.”

“I could try to visit you like Aera visits Namjoon,” you said weakly, knowing that likely wouldn’t even be an option for you given your career.

“But you can’t work remotely like she does,” he countered, reading your mind. “And, if you got a job with another group at one of the other management companies you would be just as busy as me.”

Again, you had no reply. Everything he said was absolutely right.

“Namjoon-hyung and Aera are somehow making it work, but for everyone else it’s a constant struggle being away from their partners,” he then said solemnly. “Jimin is a wreck every time he leaves his girlfriend. Jungkook has been broken up with more times than I can count because they can’t take the schedule. Jin-hyung and his fiancée almost called off their engagement after our last tour. Yoongi-hyung has given up on dating entirely.”

Upon hearing those words, the first few tears trickled down your cheeks. You knew things were tough for the guys, but you didn’t know they were that tough. Hearing about their struggles broke your heart and made you realize just how lucky you and Tae were to have been able to spend so much time together over the last few years, first as friends and now as lovers. It truly was the perfect situation, if only you could have kept it hidden.

“I want to be with you always, Jagi,” he then said softly before pressing a tender kiss to your shoulder. “I want to spend time with you every day at work, talking and laughing and driving Mrs. Choi crazy. I want to have you with me when we’re away for shoots and shows and tours, to travel the world with you and share all those experiences together. I want to fall asleep with you in my arms every night and have you be the first thing I see every morning. I want to kiss you and be close to you and show you how much I love you every day. I want to take care of you and make sure you’re safe and healthy and happy, but I can’t do any of those things if I’m not with you.”

You turned in his arms to face him, your heart so unbelievably full after hearing his beautiful words. You wanted all those things too, more than anything.

“Please don’t leave me, Jagi,” he whispered. “I can’t lose you now.”

“I promise I’ll do whatever it takes to keep us together,” he added as he brought a hand up to cup your cheek.

You knew without question that he meant those words with all his heart. It scared you a little, the idea that he might do something risky, something that would get him in even more trouble, to keep that promise, but mostly it made you love him, more deeply than ever before in your entire life.

You had thought that by leaving Big Hit you could protect him and save him from more future heartbreak, but you realized now you would only be hurting both him and yourself. There was still a small chance that things could work out and if he was brave enough to take the risk then you would be too. You knew things were likely going to come crashing down eventually anyway, whether it was tomorrow, next month, or next year, but until they did you were going to live in the moment and cherish every second you got to spend with him.

“I’m not going anywhere, baby” you promised, turning your head to gently kiss the palm of his hand. “After waiting three years to be with you I don’t want to be without you ever again.”

“You are my everything,” you then confessed. “You are the most important thing in the world to me, what I think about every morning when I wake up and every night when I fall asleep. You are truly the most wonderful person I’ve ever met in my entire life and I am grateful every day that I get to be with you and have your love. No matter what happens tomorrow, no matter how complicated or difficult things get, I’m never going to leave you.”

The second you stopped speaking, he crashed his lips onto yours as he pulled you flush against him, instantly molding his body into yours. So much was said in the passionate kiss you shared, a declaration of love, a promise to fight for your relationship and not to give up on each other, and you suddenly felt yourself overcome with both affection and desire. As he released your lips, and instead began trailing kisses down your neck, you knew without question what you wanted in that moment. You wanted him, all of him, and you wanted him to have all of you in return.

“Make love to me,” you whispered in his ear.

He immediately pulled back to look at you, a look of surprise, but unmistakable desire, written on his face.

“Right now, Jagi?” he asked breathlessly, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation.

You knew at once the greater meaning of his question: right now, when everything is uncertain and possibly falling apart, when our secret and the future of our relationship hangs by a thread?

“Right now,” you replied softly as you cupped his face with your hands. “I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, but I know that I love you and I don’t want to wait any longer to be with you.”

He leaned over and gave you a slow, sweet kiss before breaking away and leaning his forehead against yours.

“I don’t want to wait anymore either,” he then said tenderly as he reached up and took both your hands in his. “I love you so much, Jagi. More than I can put into words.”

“Then don’t use words,” you said before placing a light kiss on his cheek. “Show me.”

And so he did. You went slowly, savoring every moment as you bared yourselves and explored each other, as if for the very first time, with your hands and your lips. He pleasured you first with his fingers, the promises he whispered in your ear having you falling apart faster than ever before knowing that he was finally going to deliver on them. Moments later his head was between your legs and, despite your whimpers that it was too soon, within minutes he had you coming undone on his tongue too. You tried to reciprocate, but he gently stopped you, saying with utter sincerity that he couldn’t wait any longer to be with you.

Before you knew it, he was above you, settled between your legs, the ripped foil packet haphazardly discarded on the floor. He supported his weight on one elbow, his hand coming up to cradle your head as you wrapped an arm around his back. He took your other hand in his, carefully intertwining your fingers before resting them against the bed next to you. He asked if you were ready and when you said you were, and that you loved him, he said he loved you too and then connected your bodies in the most intimate of ways.

He entered you slowly, his eyes never once leaving yours as you both cherished the moment you gave yourselves to each other fully. The mixture of pleasure and slight discomfort had you gasping as your grip on his hand tightened. He caressed your cheek in response and whispered soothing, loving words to you. Once he was deep inside you, he stopped to make sure you were OK, the adoration and concern that colored his face melting your heart. You said you were, connecting your lips with his in a deep, sensual kiss to let him know you meant it, and a moment later he began making love to you.

The room was soon filled with the sounds of your joint pleasure: breathy curses, moans of his name and groans of yours, the erotic sound of your bodies colliding. He was slow and gentle at first, but you soon begged for more and he gave it to you. Over and over, he gave it to you, faster and harder as the last ounce of his restraint dissolved. With every thrust, the words that tumbled from his lips grew more passionate as he began losing himself: you felt so incredible, so tight and wet and soft; you were his, his perfect, beautiful Jagi, and you always would be; but, above all else, he loved you, he loved you so much.

The pleasure was overwhelming, far more intense than you had ever experienced before, and you knew it was because this was truly the first time you were making love rather than just having sex. Every snap of his hips had you in ecstasy and before long you were on the edge, desperate for release. When he reached down between your bodies to use his long, sinful fingers and told you to come for him, you did, writhing beneath him for the third time that evening. Overcome by the feeling of you coming undone around him, he reached his own peak seconds later, his deep groans and curses mingling with the cries that left your lips. He slowed his pace and gently worked you both through it, prolonging the pleasure of your first blissful experience together.

After removing himself, he collapsed beside you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest. For a few minutes you both just laid there panting, slowly coming down from your highs. Once you’d caught your breath, he leaned over and gave you the sweetest kiss, one you couldn’t help but smile into. When he pulled back, he told you that he wanted to spend the rest of his life loving you and making love to you. Blushing wildly, your heart beating erratically with unbridled joy, you told him nothing would make you happier.

Later on, as you were drifting off to sleep, his arms holding you to him tightly and protectively, you felt safe and loved and content, ready to face whatever tomorrow might bring.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 38 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.9k

warnings: none

Chapter 38: House Of Cards

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Less than 24 hours later you found yourself back on the bed in yours and Tae’s bedroom, only this time you weren’t there with him sharing an incredible, intimate experience. You were sitting there alone, nervously waiting for a knock on the door indicating it was time for you to reveal yourself to the guests that he was talking to in the living room. Tannie was in your lap, having been dropped off at the apartment earlier in the evening by Jimin’s girlfriend who had watched him while you two were away. You were clutching him to you, more tightly than he probably wanted, to be honest, but you couldn’t help it. Your anxiety was through the roof.

You thought you had prepared yourself for every possible outcome of Tae and Bang PD’s meeting, but you were wrong. So very wrong. This was not something you imagined, was not something you could have imagined even in your wildest dreams, but somehow it was now your reality. To be honest, a drastic measure like this was exactly what you were afraid of when Tae said he would do whatever it took to keep you two together. As you sat there, your heart racing and threatening to jump out of your chest, you thought back through everything that had happened earlier in the day leading up to this fateful moment.

Tae making love to you again just after you both woke up, how one second you were cuddling, whispering sweet nothings to one another between lingering kisses, and the next your clothes were strewn across the bed and your bodies were moving together in a slow, sensual rhythm.

Kissing him goodbye in front of the apartment door before you left for work, how you’d held onto each other so tightly, your lips moving languidly against one another’s, neither one of you wanting to let go.

The pit that formed in your stomach the moment you walked through the door at Big Hit and how it only continued to grow throughout the day as the time for Tae’s meeting with Bang PD drew nearer.

Receiving a final ‘I love you’ text from him just moments before he stepped into Bang PD’s office and then immediately rushing to the bathroom where you completely broke down.

Mrs. Choi taking one look at your puffy, tear-stained face once you returned to the studio and gently, almost knowingly suggesting that you take the rest of the day off.

Getting home and throwing on Tae’s grey sweatshirt, curling up on the couch with Tanju and a glass of wine, and then putting on the first episode of ‘Crash Landed on You’.

Hearing the apartment door open sometime later, how your stomach instantly dropped knowing that him not texting you as soon as he got out of the meeting was not a good sign.

The look on his face as he entered the room, the way he slowly came and sat down next to you without looking you in the eye, and the words he then nervously spoke.

Jagi, I-I found a way to keep our secret.

But before I tell you, I need you to know that I did it for you, for us.

And that I love you and only you.

Just then, the sound of three gentle knocks pulled you from your thoughts.

“Jagi?” you heard Tae’s muffled voice through the door. “Can you come out now?”

This is it, you thought to yourself. Once you walked through that door there would be no turning back. If you were being completely honest with yourself, you still weren’t 100% on board with this plan, but at this point you had no choice but to go along with it. Tae had made a decision for the two of you, one he felt was right in the moment, and you were trying your best to trust him and his judgement.

After giving Tannie one final squeeze and a kiss on the nose, you got up from the bed and slowly made your way over to the door. With a trembling hand you opened it to find Tae looking at you lovingly with a hesitant smile on his face. Taking a deep breath, you took his outstretched hand in yours, stepped through the doorway, and took in the sight before you.

Sitting on one end of the couch in front of you was Namjoon who was giving you a warm, encouraging smile. On the other end of that couch, sipping wine from one of your mother’s crystal wine glasses that you had brought over from your apartment, was the person who now held the fate of your relationship in the palm of their hand:

Jisoo

For a few seconds no one said anything as you and Jisoo simply stared at each other. She honestly didn’t look all that surprised to see you and you couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Her initial expression was cold and piercing, and for the briefest of moments you saw something dark flash across her face, but then it was gone and suddenly she was smiling brightly at you.

“Jisoo,” Tae said tentatively to break the silence. “I assume you now understand why I couldn’t tell Bang PD who I’m dating.”

“And, why I lied and said I was dating you,” he then added slowly as he turned to face her.

When Tae first told you of his plan to fake date Jisoo as a cover up, you immediately broke down in tears. Even though he had prefaced it by saying he did it for you and that he loved you and only you, and even though you wholeheartedly believed his words, it still just felt like such a slap in the face. She had caused you both so much pain over the summer, but had been particularly awful to you which Tae was well aware of. The idea of involving her in this and giving her the power to cause more pain and possibly ruin your relationship entirely was downright terrifying. However, as Tae explained the details of his conversation with Bang PD, and the reasoning behind his decision, you slowly came to realize that it truly might have been the best option given the circumstances.

It turned out that Bang PD was far more upset about Tae’s secret and contract-breaching relationship than he had let on over the phone. He was definitely angry, and also a bit disappointed, but mostly he was just hurt. The idea that Tae didn’t feel comfortable sharing this important aspect of his life with management and the rest of the BTS team bothered Bang PD greatly and made him worry that Tae had kept it a secret out of fear of judgement or retribution. When he said that, Tae got just the slightest sense that the Big Hit CEO thought Tae’s relationship might not be with a woman. The fact that Bang PD also mentioned several times that Tae would always be loved and protected by his Big Hit family no matter what only furthered that suspicion.

Feeling extremely guilty for the pain his secrecy had caused Bang PD, not to mention rather stressed to learn it might have caused legitimate confusion regarding his sexual preference, Tae realized that denying everything and providing no answers would only make things worse. With a heavy heart, he finally admitted that he did, in fact, have a girlfriend. He was about to explain how they were planning on going their separate ways due to all the drama, a story which he still worried wouldn’t be believed, but then Bang PD asked him directly if Jisoo was who he was dating. In a split second decision, thinking it might be the only way out of the now incredibly complex situation, Tae said yes.

As much as he hated to admit it, ‘dating’ Jisoo was the perfect cover story. Making up a completely fake girlfriend or pretending to date anyone else would never have worked because Big Hit would have asked for all of their personal information and then tried to check-in on them like everyone else’s partners. Since Jisoo worked at Big Hit, all the legal and security stuff was already taken care of; she had already signed all the necessary nondisclosure agreements and was also already monitored by the security team. Also, the fact that dating between idols was frowned upon, but not actually illegal, made for a great excuse as to why they’d kept their ‘relationship’ a secret.

Tae knew that involving Jisoo like this would be risky, not to mention incredibly unpleasant, but he felt there was enough incentive for her to go along with it. For starters, ‘dating’ Tae, even if only in the Big Hit circle and not publicly, still gave Jisoo a massive image boost. For someone as egotistical and obsessed with fame as her, it would be hard not to take advantage of that opportunity. On top of that was the fact that Tae had chosen to stay quiet about her indiscretions during the production of ‘Sweet Night’. Although he certainly wasn’t going to stoop to the level of full on blackmail, he wasn’t above gently reminding her that she did still owe him for that.

Before Bang PD could ask any more questions, Tae insisted that they wait until Jisoo could be present before discussing things further. Bang PD agreed and asked that Tae contact him to schedule another meeting after talking to her. Before leaving Big Hit, Tae texted her asking if she could stop by his apartment that evening to talk. He didn’t give any further details, but she immediately accepted his invitation. When he told you that, you couldn’t help but wonder if she thought he was asking her over for some kind of hookup, a thought which made you queasy.

On his way home Tae called Namjoon and explained the whole story. The older man’s reaction was apparently a mixture of pride and frustration: pride because Tae had thought on his feet so quickly in a difficult situation, but frustration because the decision he made complicated things significantly. That and he also personally disliked Jisoo and was not looking forward to having her around more. He did think the plan could work, though, and agreed to come over at the same time as Jisoo to help facilitate the discussion and come up with an arrangement that everyone was OK with.

It was comforting to know that Namjoon, your guardian angel, would be there to help you two navigate this tricky situation, but even still you were incredibly anxious about the plan. Knowing that the future of your relationship, as well as your career, was now entirely dependent on a woman you were pretty sure hated you was unbelievably nerve wracking. After everything she had done to both you and Tae, it was just so hard to believe that she would be willing to help, let alone that she could be trusted. But, this was the gamble Tae had taken and now all you could do was hope and pray that it paid off.

Prior to you entering the living room, Tae had explained as much of the situation to Jisoo as possible without revealing that you were his girlfriend. He also apologized for getting her involved without her permission and gave her the opportunity to walk away, stating that he would call Bang PD immediately and say he lied. She agreed to the plan without hesitation, though, which is when Tae came and got you.

Upon realizing that you were the woman she would be covering for, you half expected her to change her mind and leave or worse, hurl some awful insults at you and then leave, so the fact that she was still here, smiling at you no less, was surprising to say the least.

“I had a feeling it might be you,” she said sweetly with a little giggle. “Tae was always stealing glances at you when I visited the studio.”

Completely taken aback by her admission and truly at a loss for words, you simply gave her a small, hesitant smile in return. Tae led you over to the opposite couch where he took a seat and then pulled you down right beside him. He let go of your hand to put his arm around you, but immediately reached over and took it with his opposite one, carefully lacing your fingers together. It felt strange to be openly showing affection in front of Jisoo of all people, but if she found it as disconcerting as you did she didn’t let it show.

“You wrote ‘Sweet Night’ for her, right?” she then asked Tae, looking over at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Yea, I did,” he said shyly, turning and giving you an adorable little grin.

In her eyes you saw the briefest flicker of distaste, but in an instant it was gone and she was back giving you and Tae big heart eyes.

“You guys are so cute together,” she cooed excitedly.

“I’m happy to help in any way I can,” she then added with a smile. “Just tell me what I need to do.”

With that, you four began going over the specifics of how everything would work. Namjoon led a majority of the discussion which both you and Tae were extremely grateful for. Given that he was a natural leader who effortlessly commanded respect, just having him there made the whole thing seem less like some hairbrained scheme and more like a legitimate business arrangement. You could tell that Jisoo was slightly intimidated by him, especially when he mentioned that, by committing to this plan, she was agreeing to protect not only yours and Tae's relationship, but the reputation and security of BTS as a whole.

As the meeting went on, Jisoo continued to surprise you with her behavior. You kept waiting for her mean, bitter side to come out like it usually did whenever she interacted with you, but it never made an appearance. Instead, she remained kind and polite, almost friendly, the entire time. She kept smiling at you and commenting on how perfect you two were together and how sweet your love story was.

What surprised you the most was how willing she was to abide by the loose ‘terms’ Namjoon outlined. She and Tae would be ‘together’ for at least a month at which point they would reevaluate the situation. If it seemed like Bang PD and everyone else had legitimately bought their story, they would then amicably part ways. While they were ‘dating’, they would spend time together while at Big Hit. They would have lunch together at the café downstairs a few times a week and would visit each other’s studios. As far as PDA was concerned, they would hold hands, hug, and give the occasional kiss on the cheek, but nothing more. Jisoo actually spoke directly to you when she said that she promised to always be respectful of your actual relationship when they were showing ‘affection’.

The complete 180 that she had made from her previous disposition towards you had your head absolutely spinning. It was confusing and honestly unsettling to see her acting like this. As much as you disliked her before, her cruel and manipulative behavior at least made sense in a strange sort of way. In the past, it was fairly obvious that she was trying to sabotage your relationship with Tae in an attempt to be with him herself. Now, though, her intentions were much harder to decipher.

She was being so understanding and supportive and sounded so sincere when she said she just wanted to help. Part of you, the part that was still hoping for a miracle to get you and Tae out of the mess with Bang PD, wanted to believe her. You wanted to believe that she had accepted you were with him and had put her previous resentment and pettiness aside. At the very least, you wanted to believe that she was being nice simply so she could enjoy the social benefit of temporarily ‘dating’ Tae.

But, another part of you, the part that kept having flashbacks to the elevator and the Instagram post of the strawberries, was incredibly wary of her new persona. Despite everything she was saying, you simply could not shake the thought that she had ulterior motives, ones that were far less wholesome than those she had given. Jisoo was perceptive, cunning, and ruthless; over the summer she had identified your insecurities with ease and then used them against you to make you doubt yourself and your relationship with Tae. Trusting her would be giving her so much power and would make you more vulnerable than ever to the psychological warfare she was so fond of waging.

By the time the meeting ended, you found yourself honestly wishing that selfish, bitchy Jisoo had shown up tonight. She would have been miserable, no doubt, but at least you would have known what to expect and how to handle yourself. This Jisoo, the one who smiled at you all night and gave you a hug before leaving the apartment, had you completely thrown off guard and more anxious than ever before about the whole plan.

As you watched Tae walk her out, an overwhelming sense of dread settled in the pit of your stomach. Your secret relationship had always felt like a house of cards on the edge of collapse, but with Jisoo in the mix, destruction and ruin seemed more inevitable than ever before.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 39 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.2k

warnings: discussions of infidelity, implied smut, anxiety

Chapter 39: Unfounded Fears

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You had driven halfway home before you realized you forgot your phone in the studio. Your first thought was to call Tae and ask him to grab it on his way out after rehearsal, but two seconds later you realized you couldn’t call him without your phone. With a curse and groan, you pulled into a nearby gas station, turned around, and headed back to Big Hit.

Fifteen minutes later you were back in the building, walking through the halls that seemed somewhat eerie with almost everyone gone for the night. As you approached the studio, you thought you heard muffled sounds coming from inside which was strange given that it was after hours. Turning the corner into the room, you stopped dead in your tracks as you took in the horrifying sight before you:

Tae in his chair with Jisoo on his lap straddling him, their lips pressed together.

You stood there frozen to the spot, your heart in your throat, as you watched them devour each other. Their kisses were deep and desperate and messy as their hands roamed freely over each other. Oblivious to your presence, they continued for several more minutes before they finally broke apart, but even then they did not notice you.

“Where’s Y/N?” Jisoo asked, panting slightly as she ran her fingers through his hair.

“At home waiting for me,” Tae said back breathlessly. “I told her rehearsal would be going late tonight.”

“That way she won’t be suspicious when I come home all sweaty,” he added with a mischievous smirk.

“All sweaty, huh?” she questioned coyly. “I wonder how that might happen.”

“You know how,” he said in a deep, sultry voice as he began kissing all over her neck and chest.

The sounds of her breathy moans pierced right through your heart, sucking out every last ounce of joy that had once been held there. You wanted to run away or cover your ears or scream so loud it would drown out her voice, anything to end the torture of hearing him pleasure her, but you were absolutely paralyzed.

“When are you going to leave her?” Jisoo then asked as she rolled her hips, causing him to let out a low groan.

“Soon, Jagi,” he cooed, his voice sickly sweet. “I promise.”

“Then you’ll have me all to yourself,” he added, his voice dropping as he grabbed her hips and began roughly grinding her back and forth over himself.

“Fuck,” she suddenly cried out. “That feels good.”

“I can make it feel even better, but you’re going to have to beg,” he said smugly.

It was at that moment that Tae finally looked up into the mirror and saw you watching them, tears silently streaming down your face. He didn’t bat an eye, just stared at you with a hard expression as he continued grinding Jisoo against him. In his cold, dark gaze you saw absolutely no trace of the man you fell in love with, the man you gave yourself to and thought you would spend the rest of your life with. His eyes remained locked on yours like that for a solid minute, your heart shattering a little more with each passing second, until his lips eventually curled up into a smirk.

“You should leave,” was all he finally said.

And so you did, backing away slowly, still unable to tear your gaze from the heartbreaking scene before you, as you wondered when exactly you lost his love and if you ever really had it in the first place…

~~~

You woke with a start to the sound of Tae’s voice and the feeling of his hand gently caressing your cheek.

“Jagi,” he whispered softly. “Jagi, wake up.”

Slowly opening your eyes, you found him lying next to you, his expression one of deep concern. For a moment you just stared at him, trying to blink away the sleep from your eyes. When you felt his thumb brushing away the tears that you just realized were sliding down your cheeks, you furrowed your brow at him in sleepy confusion.

“You were crying in your sleep,” he said, now sounding incredibly worried. “You were crying and saying my name.”

At his words, a flood of memories came rushing back to you as you suddenly remembered exactly why you were crying:

The dream.

The nightmare.

The awful, wretched nightmare where Tae cheated on you with Jisoo.

Despite realizing that it hadn’t actually happened, an overwhelming sadness still welled up inside you and before you knew it a great heaving sob was tearing through you.

This was one of the most vivid and realistic dreams you’d ever had in your entire life. You hadn’t had one that felt this real since your mom died. Back then, you would often dream she was still alive. The dreams would feel so real that for the first few moments after you woke up you would be blissfully unaware that she was actually gone. Reality would always come crashing back down, though, leaving you completely devastated each and every time. Your therapist had told you that dreaming so vividly like that wasn’t uncommon for someone who had experienced a trauma or was dealing with extreme anxiety.

And extreme anxiety is exactly what you had been feeling all night.

Your unease stemmed from the fact that you and Tae had not had a chance to really talk things over after the meeting last night. Jisoo and Namjoon were there until rather late and as soon as they left Tae called Bang PD to set up the meeting with him and Jisoo the next day. While he was on the phone you received a call of your own from your father who you realized you had yet to call since returning home from America. You ended up talking to him for a while, much longer than you originally intended to, and after finally hanging up with him you walked back into the bedroom to find Tae already passed out.

He’d changed into pajamas, but was still on top of the covers, a sign that he had clearly been waiting for you which was sweet. Knowing he’d had a long and exhausting day, you decided not to wake him up and instead just tucked him in with a spare blanket. As you climbed into bed next to him a short while later, you lamented the fact that you wouldn’t get to feel his arms around you. Not thirty minutes later, though, he stirred in his sleep, reaching out haplessly until he eventually grasped you and molded himself around you through your blanket. It was adorable, but you soon found that not even his warm embrace was enough to quell your unrest.

While Tae slept peacefully, you were up until well past midnight replaying the events from the evening over and over again, dissecting every little detail and trying to make sense of it all. A seemingly infinite number of doubts and fears tore through your mind, most of which involved Jisoo betraying you in some sort of way. No matter how hard you tried to calmly and rationally reason them away, they simply would not let up.

As the night wore on and you felt the darkness of the room closing in around you, your worries grew more and more irrational until finally the worst thought of all invaded your mind: Tae leaving you for Jisoo. You knew this fear was not at all rooted in reality, and was merely the byproduct of your overwhelming anxiety, but it terrified you nonetheless. Just thinking about it was enough to bring tears to your eyes and you soon found yourself muffling quiet sobs into your pillow, trying desperately not to wake up Tae.

Eventually, sometime around 2:00 AM, your emotionally and physically exhausted body begged for sleep. It found you, but the turmoil that plagued your waking thoughts obviously seeped into your subconscious, the result of which was your awful, wretched nightmare.

“Jagi, what’s wrong?” Tae asked worriedly as he climbed under the covers and pulled your trembling body to his chest.

“I-I had a bad dream,” you whispered, still hiccupping slightly through your tears. “A very bad dream.”

Upon hearing your words, he seemed to relax slightly, his hold on you loosening a bit so he could pull back to look at you.

“What did you dream about that made you so upset?” he asked gently, tucking a loose strand of your hair behind your ear as he spoke.

You didn’t want to tell him. You felt sick just thinking about the things that happened in the dream and couldn’t even imagine how devastated he would be if you told him. Yes, it was only a dream, but it was still something your subconscious had come up with and for that you felt unbelievably guilty.

“I don’t think you want to know,” you said hesitantly as you looked down.

“Jagi, if it made you this upset I don’t just want to know, I need to know,” he said seriously, lifting your chin up so your gaze met his.

“It’s going to make you sad,” you whispered.

“I still need to know,” he whispered back.

Realizing he wasn’t going to let it go, you closed your eyes and took a slow, deep breath before revealing the full extent of last night’s anxiety attack.

“You were with Jisoo,” you began, trying your best to stay calm. “You lied to me about rehearsal going late, but really you were with her in the studio.”

“I walked in and she was sitting on your lap and you were kissing and touching and clearly about to do a lot more,” you added, your voice now beginning to shake.

“When you saw that I was there you didn’t stop,” you said finally as fresh tears pooled in your eyes. “You just told me to leave.”

A beat of silence passed as your words washed over him, his face instantly falling as the realization hit him.

“You dreamed that I cheated on you, Jagi?” he asked quietly, the hurt in his voice unmistakable.

When you nodded your head in reply, you felt his hold on you tighten as he pressed his lips to your temple. For a few moments he didn’t say anything else, but you could tell just from the way he was breathing that he was upset and trying to keep it together.

“I’m so sorry,” he finally said, sounding so guilty and so completely broken. “It’s my fault that you’re upset and feeling anxious and having doubts.”

“Doubts about us, about me,” he then added, his voice breaking at the end.

Your heart clenched. This was exactly why you didn't want to tell him about your dream.

“Baby, I’m not having doubts about you,” you said quickly as you started to cry again.

“I trust you completely,” you continued, cupping his cheek as you spoke. “I know you would never do that to me.”

“I’m just scared of trusting Jisoo,” you finally admitted with a sob. “I know she was being all nice and supportive, but I’m still so afraid that she’s going to hurt us.”

“I’m nervous about trusting her too,” he said guiltily. “She seemed almost too willing to help us.”

Hearing Tae confirm your suspicions about her was oddly comforting. Part of why you felt so stressed last night was because you thought you were the only one who found the meeting unsettling. While Tae and Namjoon were acting all calm and collected, you were having an internal panic attack that you prayed wasn’t outwardly on display. You worried that you were just crazy and paranoid, that your insecurities were clouding your judgement and causing you to read into things too closely. Knowing that Tae also sensed things were off made you feel infinitely better because it meant you were on the same page. The only way you were going to make it through the next month was if things stayed that way, if you had each other’s backs and worked together as a team.

“I promise it’s going to be OK, though,” Tae then assured you, stroking your hair soothingly. “I’m not going to let her hurt you.”

“I’ll never let anyone hurt you, Jagi,” he vowed. “I’ll always take care of you and keep you safe.”

He sealed his promise with a kiss, one that was sad and sweet, full of undeniable guilt, but also so much love. He kept kissing you like that, tenderly and longingly, until your tears finally stopped and you relaxed into his embrace, utterly spent from the emotional toll the long night had taken on you. After releasing your lips, he snuggled you against his chest, whispering soft words of comfort and promises of love between tender kisses to your neck and shoulder.

“There’s something I want to give you,” he said a little while later, once you had fully calmed down and were resting peacefully in his arms.

“You wait here, OK?” he then added, giving you a quick kiss before gently extracting himself and climbing out of bed.

As you watched him walk out of the room, wondering what he could possibly have left to give to you after he’d already given you so much, you felt a pang of guilt ripple through you. You should never have told him about your dream. Even though he told you that he wanted to know, that he needed to know, you should have realized that sharing it with him would do more harm than good. All it did was make him think you legitimately questioned his commitment to you and your relationship which honestly couldn’t have been further from the truth.

While he was asking a lot of you with this plan, you realized he was asking even more of himself. He was agreeing to spend time with someone he did not respect, someone who had deeply wronged him in the past, all while having to pretend not only to like them, but potentially love them. Knowing how meaningful intimacy was to him, you knew that having to show affection towards her, even in the most innocent of ways, would still likely make him very uncomfortable.

Being with her also meant risking and damaging his reputation within the Big Hit community. Unsurprisingly, most people were not big fans of Jisoo due to her selfish and abrasive behavior. People would no doubt be surprised to discover Tae was dating her and might also be somewhat disappointed in him. Just like after the interview, it made you feel incredibly sad and also guilty to think of people judging him for something he didn’t actually do.

The simple truth was that he was doing all this for you, to keep you safe and healthy and happy, just like he always promised. You realized that the best thing you could do moving forward was to not unload more of your unfounded fears upon him and instead just be supportive. So many times you had let your emotions get the best of you and then acted rashly in response, jeopardizing your relationship with him in the process. The last thing you wanted was to repeat those mistakes and hurt him yet again.

While you were sitting there in bed contemplating all of this, you suddenly heard the sound of two distinct sets of footsteps outside the bedroom door.

“Tannie, bring this to Mommy,” you heard Tae whisper as the door slowly opened.

At the sound of Tae calling you Tannie’s ‘Mommy’, all previous thoughts of Jisoo and the plan and your worries instantly flew from your mind. You absolutely loved the way that word sounded rolling off his tongue and you couldn’t stop yourself from imagining him saying it in a different, even more meaningful context.

Before you could get too ahead of yourself with those thoughts, Tannie came bounding into the room, jumped up onto the bed, and then settled on your lap. There, attached to his collar was a little velvet drawstring bag. After removing it from his collar, you opened it up and gently turned it upside down, letting the contents fall out into the palm of your hand.

It was a ring, a stunning thin silver band with tiny diamonds wrapping all the way around - tiny, purple diamonds. As you gazed at it in wonder, you quickly realized that the diamonds were not just any shade of purple. They were a beautiful orchid, a color that you knew was incredibly rare and no doubt very expensive for a diamond, the same exact shade as a certain special piece of jewelry you often found yourself daydreaming about.

Tae’s purple ring

“It’s a couple’s ring,” he said from the doorway. “I know they’re usually given after you’ve been together for 100 days, but I just couldn’t wait any longer.”

“It’s meant for your index finger since your ring finger would have been too obvious,” he went on as he walked over to the bed and sat down beside you. “I sized it based on that one ring of your mom’s that you always wear.”

“I have one too,” he then continued, holding up his hand to display a new thick gold band on his own index finger. “It doesn’t actually look anything like yours, again for obvious reasons, but we’ll know that they go together so that’s all that matters.”

For a moment you were utterly speechless. You knew without question that it was not a coincidence that this ring matched the one he wore around his neck and the knowledge of that fact was overwhelming in the best way possible. The statement he was making by giving it to you was clear as day and had you falling impossibly deeper in love with him.

“Baby, it’s absolutely beautiful,” you said breathlessly as he gently took the ring from you and slipped it onto your finger. “Thank you so much.”

You then crawled out from under the covers and climbed onto his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck as he automatically snuck his around your waist. He was sporting the biggest, brightest smile, one you found yourself instantly mimicking due to the abundance of love and joy that was blooming in your chest.

“You’re beautiful,” he said shyly as he pulled you closer and brought his lips to yours for a slow, sweet kiss.

“I love you, Jagi,” he then said softly after breaking away and looking deeply into your eyes. “I know things are difficult right now, but if you’re ever feeling anxious or scared or are having doubts about anything I want you to look down at this ring and remember that I will always love you.”

At his words, happy tears instantly pooled at the corners of your eyes. He always knew just what you needed, always knew just what to say to reassure you that everything was truly going to be OK. 

“I’ll always love you, too,” you said quietly, as you pressed your lips against his once more and took his hand, intertwining your fingers and bringing together the two rings you now wore to symbolize your commitment to one another.

In that moment you knew that all you needed to do was trust in him and the love you had for one another. If you did that, no matter what anyone else did or said, you two would surely be OK.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 40 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 3.4k

warnings: implied smut, 

Chapter 40: He Loves Me And Only Me

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As the reality of the situation began to truly sink in over the course of the next few days, you continued to draw strength from Tae and his quiet confidence. You tried your best to focus solely on your relationship and the things you could control and his unwavering love and support made that infinitely easier. The anxiety you’d felt the night of the meeting abated with each passing day, but it did not leave you entirely. Instead, it remained ever-present in the back of your mind, quietly simmering away. You decided that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, though; fear was a useful tool if it motivated you to keep yourself and those you love safe from harm.

Tae and Jisoo’s meeting with Bang PD went fairly well. Jisoo was apparently quite the actress, pouring on the charm and easily slipping into ‘girlfriend mode’ as she and Tae explained how they started dating over the summer while they were working on the song. Bang PD seemed to buy their story, however, after Jisoo left the room he did spend a few minutes talking to Tae privately. He admitted that he was a bit surprised they were dating given that they were so different and also because things had seemed a little tense while they were working together. For a split second, Tae thought he sensed the tiniest bit of skepticism from Bang PD, but then it was gone. Bang PD ended their talk by reiterating that Big Hit would always be there for Tae and saying that his door would always be open if he ever needed to talk about anything.  

There were still a couple more meetings that Tae and Jisoo needed to have with management later that week so it was decided that they would officially announce their ‘relationship’ the following Monday. To brighten the mood in the meantime, Tae suggested that you two spend the next few days getting you officially moved in. The two of you made a couple trips to your old apartment to gather your things, getting slightly sidetracked from your packing during the first visit after you jokingly mentioned your bed had never seen any action. Every time you went there you were terrified that someone was going to recognize Tae, but he wore a giant beanie, a facemask, and a jacket with the collar popped so he thankfully went unnoticed.

Once the last of your things were brought over, Tae surprised you by telling you he had his lease amended to have your name on it. This meant that you no longer needed to check-in as a guest, but instead could come right in as a permanent resident. It was such an incredibly thoughtful gesture, one that reiterated how serious he was about you and your relationship and instantly brought happy tears to your eyes.

Before he and Jisoo started acting like a couple around Big Hit next week, Tae decided he wanted to tell the other guys the truth about your relationship and the fake dating cover. The Saturday after the meeting with Bang PD, Tae invited all the guys over for what he told them was going to be a ‘guy’s night’. After they’d arrived, he gathered them all in the living room and then announced that there would be a surprise guest that evening. In response to the inquiries as to who the guest was, Tae excitedly responded that his girlfriend would be joining them, the giddiness in his voice making your heart swell. When he finally brought you out from the bedroom into the living room, you were met with such an abundance of love and joy that you thought your heart would surely burst.

Jungkook sat stock still, his eyes wide as saucers, as he kept repeating, ‘Noona?! Noona is Jagi?!’

Jin initially deadpanned and said, ‘Taehyuuuuung, you’re always breaking the rules’, but then immediately broke out into a massive grin.

Hobi jumped to his feet, clapping happily as he shouted, ‘Congratulations’.

Yoongi first just stared at the two of you with his classic gummy smile before ultimately saying, ‘It’s about time’.

Jimin and Namjoon obviously already knew, a fact which the other four guys claimed was woefully unfair.

Before opening the floor to questions about your relationship, questions which you could tell they were all itching to ask, Tae informed them about the meeting with Bang PD and the plan with Jisoo. The conversation understandably became pretty heavy at that point, the guys' faces all growing very serious as they realized how much the two of you had been through over the last couple days and how much of an uphill battle it would be moving forward. When Tae finished explaining everything, each and every one of them vowed to help you two in whatever way they could, causing both you and Tae to grow misty-eyed.

After that things lightened up considerably and the eight of you spent the rest of the evening eating and drinking and talking and laughing. The guys had insisted that you and Tae sit together on the loveseat which you were more than amenable to. Sitting between his legs, your back against his chest with his strong arms wrapped around your waist, you felt safe and secure and happy all night, but never so much as when he whispered in your ear, ‘They love you, Jagi, but I love you more’.

Your favorite part of the night was when the guys all took turns recounting the first time they realized Tae had a crush on you. Tae was bright red the entire time and kept burying his face in your hair out of embarrassment. For Yoongi, it was the time he had harmlessly asked if you were single and Tae had ignored the actual question entirely and instead curtly replied, ‘You’re not allowed to date her.’. For Hobi, it was when he commented that you looked really good in your dress at last year’s Big Hit banquet and Tae grumbled back something along the lines of, ‘You shouldn’t be looking at her like that’, and then proceeded to give the older man death-glares the rest of the evening.

Tae’s slight possessiveness was a huge turn on for you so hearing the guys go on and on about how he’d obviously felt you were his girl all along definitely had you feeling some kind of way by the end of the night. He’d clearly been affected by the conversation too because the moment the last of the guys left he picked you up and carried you into the bedroom. After slowly removing your clothes one by one, his lips mapping every single inch of newly exposed skin as he went, he then spent the rest of the night making sure you knew exactly who you belonged to.

The atmosphere in the apartment was much more somber the following day. Knowing that things were undoubtedly about to get rather difficult and complicated, you tried to soak up every last second of peace and simplicity while you still could. You and Tae spent the entire day in your pajamas watching TV, eating junk food and takeout, and kissing, cuddling, and making love. Unfortunately, more than a few tears were shed throughout the day. You tried to hold them in, but you just couldn’t help it; you were on the brink of something big and unknown and you were nervous. Although he was clearly trying to be strong for you, it was obvious that Tae was nervous too. He held you to him so tightly that night as you fell asleep, like he was afraid if he loosened his hold even just a little you would somehow slip away from him and be lost forever.  

~~~

The following morning, news that Tae and Jisoo were dating spread like wildfire at Big Hit as they walked in from the parking garage holding hands. You couldn’t deny that watching them stroll into the studio together, talking and laughing about who knows what, caused a sharp pang in your chest. You knew, of course, that it wasn’t real, that Tae was using his impressive acting skills to put on a rather convincing show. Regardless, the image of him with another woman was still painful and you had to excuse yourself momentarily to take a breath and get a grip in the hallway.

When you came back in you found Tae in his chair and Jisoo curled up in the chair beside him. Instantly, your mind flooded with memories from the summer when you would walk into the studio and find this very same sight before you. It had been excruciating to see them together like that at the time, but back then you didn’t know that he loved you. Now you did. You had been reminded that morning when he made love to you and when he said it to you after giving you a goodbye kiss at the door. You were reminded again just then as you looked down at your hand and gazed at the beautiful ring he’d given you.

He loves me and only me

Like a mantra, you repeated those words to yourself as you walked over to them with a bright smile on your face, carefully avoiding Tae’s sad eyes which followed you the entire way. You repeated them over and over again that morning and every time from then on when you saw or even imagined them together.

That first week was hard, much harder than you thought it was going to be, and also much harder than you let on when you talked to Tae. He spoke freely about how uncomfortable it all made him and how much he missed you and how he couldn’t wait until it was all over. It was both comforting and distressing to know that he was hurting just as much as you were, but you kept your feelings in check when talking with him. He clearly felt guilty about the whole situation; letting him know how heartbroken you felt every time you saw them together and making him feel even worse wouldn’t help the situation at all. You reminded yourself that he was doing this for you and that the best way you could repay him was to be strong and supportive.

For the most part, Jisoo adhered to the PDA rules that you all had discussed at the meeting. She was a little more touchy and clingy that first day than you would have liked, but you supposed that was how someone might act when showing off their new ‘boyfriend’ to coworkers so you let it slide. Tae did not engage much with her in return which you greatly appreciated. It was one thing to see her putting her hands on him, but watching him put his hands on her, the same hands that held you close and touched you intimately, was infinitely worse.    

However, as much as it hurt to see them giving physical signs of affection, it was actually their words that you found cut mostly deeply. You were able to block out most of what Jisoo said, having gotten used to doing just that over the summer when she would barge into the studio and steal Tae’s ear for hours at a time. Hearing him speak to her, though, occasionally in that soft, loving tone that was only supposed to be reserved for you, was legitimately painful. Every word he said was like a dagger in your heart, but nothing hurt near as much as the first time you heard him call her ‘Jagi’.

By Friday afternoon you were emotionally exhausted, having discovered that keeping everything bottled up was far more taxing than simply letting it out. You were very much looking forward to the weekend and being able to spend 48 Jisoo-free hours with your boyfriend. Almost done packing up your bag, you were just about to head out for the day when Eunji and Donghae stopped by your station. As Tae’s stylist and close friend, it shouldn’t have surprised you that people would eventually come to you asking questions, but it did and you were therefore completely unprepared for what they came to say.

“OK, what the fuck?” Eunji huffed out to start the conversation. “Why is Tae dating her?”

“Did you know?” Donghae quickly added, sounding equally repulsed. “You guys are so close. He must have told you, right?”

You had been rummaging around on the counter looking for something when they walked over and were immensely grateful that they could not see your face at that very moment. For starters, it stung to hear the words ‘he’s dating her’, even though you knew they weren’t true, and a grimace had involuntarily flashed across your face in response. However, the panicked expression you now certainly wore was what you really didn’t want them to see. The absolute last thing you wanted to be talking about right now was the fake relationship your boyfriend was in with a woman you despised, didn’t fully trust, and were growing more and more jealous of every day.

“I actually didn’t know,” you replied back casually, keeping your back to them as you spoke. “I found out Monday morning along with everyone else.”

“Surely he doesn’t actually like her,” Donghae then said, his tone dripping with disdain. “She’s literally the worst human being I’ve ever met.”

“Maybe he’s just in it for the sex?” Eunji questioned bluntly in reply. “I know he doesn’t really seem the type, but he is still a guy and she is unfortunately very hot.”

Upon hearing those words, your heart momentarily stopped. You could feel the heat rising to your face as you willed yourself not to imagine what Eunji had just spoken of. Watching Jisoo give Tae a kiss on the cheek that morning had been enough to make your stomach lurch so the idea of them being legitimately intimate together was truly nauseating. All at once you realized this was not a conversation you were emotionally capable of handling right now, but you didn’t know how to get them to drop it without causing some sort of scene.

With every passing second that you didn’t respond to them, the anxiety inside you grew. You tried and tried to formulate some sort of coherent, nonchalant response, but every ounce of your mental bandwidth was consumed with efforts of blocking out disturbingly explicit images of Tae and Jisoo together. You had honestly spent all week trying not to let your mind wander in this torturous sort of way, but Eunji’s words had clearly triggered something within you and you now found yourself wholly incapable of getting it back under control.

The undeniable truth was that Jisoo was an incredibly attractive woman. She was tall and thin and strikingly beautiful, effortlessly sexy and incredibly alluring. She was, as she had so poignantly noted that day in the elevator, everything you were not. And now, for perhaps the hundredth time since this whole thing started, you found yourself wondering exactly how attractive Tae thought she was.

You knew it was not at all healthy or productive to let yourself contemplate such things, especially when Tae had given you absolutely no reason to doubt him, but you just couldn’t help it. The idea that he might find her more attractive, might secretly wish he could be intimate with her instead of you, crept into your mind and instantly threatened to overwhelm you entirely. Your heart was now starting to race and your breath was growing shallower by the second, but the sudden sound of heeled-footsteps coming towards you thankfully stopped your spiraling.

“Eunji, Donghae,” you heard Mrs. Choi say sharply as she strode over to the three of you. “That is quite enough.”

“I will not tolerate this kind of gossip in my studio,” she continued, rather threateningly. “Do you understand?”

“Yes, Mrs. Choi,” they both muttered out sheepishly.

As the two of them said their goodbyes, you gave a quick wave in reply, still incapable of forming words. Closing your eyes, you stood there for a few moments and took a couple slow, deep breaths to try and calm down. Eventually, whatever terrible thing had just welled up inside of you receded and you felt yourself relax.

“Y/N, are you OK?” you heard Mrs. Choi ask gently from behind you.

The tender tone of her voice would have surprised you, possibly even frightened you, had it not been for the meeting you’d had with her last month following the incident with the coffee at the photoshoot. The two of you had met in her office one afternoon that following week where she proceeded to again sincerely apologize for being so hard on you over the last three years. At first you couldn’t help but wonder if she was only being nice to you because she knew about your mom, but as the conversation went on you got the sense there was more to it than that.

She said more than once that she had ‘gotten things wrong’ and even said that she was proud of the support you’ve shown BTS, and Tae specifically, over the years. Since then, there had been a noticeable change in her behavior towards you. She was kinder, more patient, and, dare you say it, even somewhat affectionate. The fact that she sent you home last week when she saw you were upset was proof enough of your changed relationship; she never would have allowed that in the past.

“Yea, I-I’m fine,” you replied, trying to hide the shakiness in your voice.

With the panic that had previously threatened to overwhelm you now gone, the only emotion that seemed to be left inside you was the one you had spent all week trying to ignore: heartbreak. Despite your new and improved relationship with Mrs. Choi, you were not quite ready to bare the depths of your soul to her. However, you feared if you stayed here much longer and she spoke to you again in that incredibly caring, almost motherly voice, you might do just that. Quickly collecting the remainder of your things and stuffing them into your bag, you said goodbye, wished her a pleasant weekend, and then left.

On the drive home you convinced yourself that what happened at the studio was not a big deal. You’d gotten upset because Eunji had unknowingly said something insensitive and inappropriate to you, but that was a completely normal reaction. When you arrived at home a bit later to find Tae had somehow snuck out of work early so he could have a candlelight dinner prepared, you were reminded of just how silly it was to worry about him and Jisoo. Yes, she was an attractive woman, but he was your boyfriend. He loved and desired you.

“What’s all this for?” you asked with a smile as you looked over the beautifully laid table.

“Because I love you,” he said as he came over and snuck his arms around your waist, pulling you in for a kiss.

Still wound up from Eunji’s words, and perhaps feeling the need to prove something to yourself, you took the innocent kiss he gave you and deepened it, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your body against his. He responded immediately, licking into your mouth messily and teasing you with gentle bites to your lower lip as he slowly backed you against the nearest counter. You kissed him hungrily and greedily, relishing the low groans you drew from him, and only released his lips when you were forced to come up for air.

“By any chance does this meal come with dessert?” you asked coyly, walking your fingers up the buttons of his shirt until they reached the tantalizing bit of exposed chest.

“Of course,” he replied smoothly, his voice dropping into his incredibly sexy lower register. “I’ll always keep your sweet tooth satisfied, Jagi.”

The way he began trailing kisses down your jawline to your neck told you he knew exactly what type of dessert you were inquiring about.

“What if I want my dessert before dinner?” you then questioned, your voice breathy from the wicked things he was doing with that pretty mouth of his.

“Then I’ll give it to you right here, right now,” he whispered in your ear.

As he picked you up, set you down on the counter, and began serving you the sweet, sinful treats you desperately craved, you heard familiar words ringing in your head, ones that you hoped were loud enough to drown out everything else:

He loves me and only me

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 41 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 4.0k

warnings: cursing, implied smut, anxiety

Chapter 41: Divergence

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Over the next few weeks, you felt your life diverging at an alarmingly fast rate in two very different directions: one towards bliss, the other towards chaos. You were well aware that the resulting strain on your emotional wellbeing was not sustainable, but the knowledge that the suffering was temporary allowed you to ignore warnings you otherwise might have heeded. It would all be over soon, you told yourself. You just had to push through and hold on a little longer.

Inside the apartment, where it was just you and Tae, life was nothing short of a fairytale. He was all you had ever hoped for in a partner and more and you were grateful every morning you woke up in his warm embrace. With the threat of being found out no longer looming quite so large, you were able to finally slow down, catch your breath, and let yourselves relax. You fell into a comfortable daily routine, made legitimate plans for the future, and started actually building your life together as a couple.

Now that you were officially moved in, and the apartment was truly your home, you updated your address for important things like your credit card and phone bill. Tae actually gave you a credit card to one of his own personal spending accounts which you initially refused, but ultimately accepted once he explained he wanted you to have it in case of an emergency. He didn’t say what the limit on the card was nor did you ask; you weren’t sure you wanted to know. He also insisted that you have him listed in your phone as your emergency contact, stating that being there for you if anything ever happened was more important than keeping your secret. You agreed, finding his suggestion both incredibly sweet and also highly practical, and told him to put you down as his emergency contact too.

Another big step you took was finally telling your Dad that you and Tae were together. He seemed genuinely happy for you and supportive of your relationship, however, he did ask that you put Tae on the phone after you finished talking. Tae ended up talking to your Dad for almost an hour, about what he would not say, but he said he enjoyed the conversation and that he was looking forward to meeting him in person.

You unofficially ‘met’ Tae's parents too via FaceTime. You were incredibly nervous at first, but upon realizing they were literally the sweetest humans imaginable, you instantly relaxed. You made plans for both of your families to come visit next month once things were back to normal and before award show season began in early December. You also made plans for the holidays; Tae would spend Christmas with your family in Busan and you would spend Tae’s birthday and New Years with his family in Daegu.

Every day you learned something new about Tae, discovered another one of his adorable quirks that added another brushstroke onto the canvas of your love for him. In return, you shared more and more about yourself, telling him things you had always sworn you would never tell another person as long as you lived. Opening up to him just came so naturally. With him you knew there would never be any judgement; only love and acceptance.

Tae spoke about the future with a certainty and a confidence that some people might have found surprising or even frightening after only dating for two months, but you felt absolutely no apprehension at his words. Every hope and dream he shared was one you had long held deep in your heart. Hearing him speak them aloud confirmed what you already knew to be true: he was the love of your life.

One night, when you were snuggling on the couch watching a movie, the scene panned to an absolutely stunning house in the countryside. Having always dreamed of living in a house like that, you instantly found yourself swooning, going on and on about how perfect it was.

“I’ll buy you a house just like that, Jagi,” Tae said happily, hugging you to him as he spoke.

“Tae, you can’t just buy me a house,” you said with a laugh, realizing he probably could buy a house just like that tomorrow if he wanted to and pay in cash too.

“But I want to,” he said with a pout that you could just hear in his voice. “Not right now, of course, but someday I’ll buy us our first house.”

Realizing he wasn’t joking, but was seriously talking about your future home together, you immediately stopped laughing.

“It will be beautiful and elegant, but also cozy and welcoming,” he went on dreamily.

“It will also be quite spacious...with a big yard to play in...and a lot of bedrooms,” he then added a bit nervously, giving your shoulder a little kiss.

At his words, you felt a blush creep onto your cheeks as the good kind of goosebumps prickled up all over your body. You knew he wasn’t really talking about bedrooms right now, rather, he was talking about who might be inhabiting said bedrooms. In all the times you two had talked about the future, this was the first time this particular subject had come up, albeit cryptically. You couldn’t deny how unbelievably happy it made you to know he felt this way, that he saw this kind of future with you.

“A lot of bedrooms, huh?” you mused as you turned around to face him, a shy smile on your face. “How many is a lot?”

“Three or four,” he said bashfully, a light tinge of pink on his own cheeks. “Maybe five.”

“But,” he then added softly, “I only want one pink bedroom.”

“And who will live in this pink bedroom?” you asked shyly, biting your lower lip to try and contain your grin.

“A little princess,” he said quietly, kissing your cheek. “Who looks just like you.”

For a second you just looked at him, your heart beating erratically in your chest as you imagined the wonderful things he had just described.

“Do you really mean that?” you then questioned hesitantly.

“Jagi, I meant it when I said I wanted to spend the rest of my life loving you,” he replied sincerely as he reached down and took your hand.

“I want to marry you and have a family with you someday,” he then said, his voice soft, but unwavering, as he looked at you with the most tender, loving expression.

At that, your smile grew impossibly wide, as did his, and for a few moments you just stared into each other’s eyes, completely lost in the moment which you decided was one of the happiest of your life.

“I want that, too,” you finally said back before connecting your lips with his for a truly blissful kiss.

Your kissing remained sweet and innocent for a while until you eventually broke away and gave him your best smoldering stare.

“Five is a lot,” you said coyly. “We’ll have to be very efficient if we want that many.”

“We will,” he hummed in reply, placing kisses down your neck.

“Maybe we should practice,” you then teased.

“Yes,” he instantly agreed, rolling on top of you with a wolfish grin. “We should most definitely practice.”

Your physical intimacy blossomed right along with your emotional intimacy. Tae made love to you almost every day, oftentimes more than once. His passion and tenderness never waned and every time felt just as special as the night you’d first given yourselves to each other. The only days when he didn't make love to you were the days when he fucked you instead, the distinct difference between the two types of sex having become apparent the first time he told you to get on all fours for him and then took you from behind.

He was relentless and commanding when he fucked you, but always in the pursuit of your pleasure. The utter filth that left his mouth whenever he did so had you absolutely reeling; never in your life had you heard him speak so graphically, so possessively, but never in your life had you been more turned on from words alone. He was rough, but to just the right degree and only because you told him you liked it that way. He was always attentive, though, making sure you were comfortable with what he was doing and saying, asking if it felt good, if you wanted more, if you could handle more.

Fans of spontaneity, your sexual exploits were not limited to just the bedroom. Within two weeks of getting home from America, you two had christened every room in the apartment, including the master closet and the laundry room. More often than not things would start heating up as soon as you got home. You lost count of the number of times he had you pressed up against the apartment door seconds after you arrived because he said he just couldn’t wait a moment longer after wanting you all day.

How he had gone from inexperienced virgin to total sex god in just a few short weeks was beyond you, but you weren’t about to question it. You were more than happy to enjoy the benefits of his newfound sexual prowess as well as his equally spectacular aftercare. Following any kind of sex, whether it was passionate lovemaking in your bed or a dirty fuck on the kitchen counter, he always took the utmost care of you. He cleaned you, cuddled you, and showered you with love and affection until you were a blushing, mushy mess in his arms.

You cherished the time you spent alone with Tae where you could be together and just be yourselves. It was the only part of the day when you felt alive and relaxed and happy, the only time where you felt like everything was going to be OK. Knowing it was the only thing keeping your head above water, you went to great lengths to protect the tiny bit of paradise inside your shared home. Because outside of it, in the other part of your life which was hurtling in the opposite direction, everything was beginning to fall apart.

~~~

The first week had been hard, but bearable. The amount of heartbreak it caused you wasn’t lethal and with Tae there to help put the pieces back together, you were pretty sure you could make it out of this thing alive. But, like always, the moment you thought you had everything under control, the ground shifted beneath you.

It all started that very next Monday morning when you were in the studio getting Tae ready for a commercial the guys were going to be filming for a new sponsor. The two of you were up to your usual antics, joking and laughing and possibly causing a bit of a ruckus, when Jisoo came in and sat down next to Tae. She tried to insert herself into the conversation, but you two were in your own little world, talking a mile a minute and laughing hysterically as you recounted what happened during filming for the Bodyfriend massage chair commercial earlier that year.

While doing Tae’s hair and makeup before filming began that day, you may have made a couple slightly inappropriate jokes about Mrs. Choi needing a ‘body friend’ to help her relax. After leaving the prep room in stitches, Tae spent the next hour on set biting back more laughter and trying to keep it together. Partway through filming, Mrs. Choi of all people finally pulled Tae aside and asked him what was so funny which was, of course, the moment when he completely lost it.

He began laughing so hard he started crying which meant you had to come out and touch up his makeup. One look at his face, though, and you lost it as well. Deemed official ‘disturbers of the peace’, you were both then asked to leave the set and told to only come back once you could control yourselves. After locking yourselves in a break room and laughing uncontrollably for ten straight minutes, the giggles were finally out of your system and you were able to return to the set and finish the shoot.

Eventually, after experiencing a similar laughing fit, the two of you settled down and Jisoo commandeered the conversation, diving into a monologue about her upcoming solo album. The way she completely cut you out might have bothered you were it not for the silly, flirty glances Tae kept giving you through the mirror when he thought she wasn’t looking. He was maybe being a tad too brazen given she was right there, but you didn’t care; he was going out of his way to make sure you felt seen and loved which you appreciated so much.

An hour later, once his hair and makeup was all done, he got up to join the other guys on their way to the set. Hearing him say, ‘Bye Jagi’, to Jisoo and watching her give him a kiss on the cheek was still painful, but it hurt ever-so-slightly less than it did last week which you took as a good sign.

What wasn’t a good sign, though, was the fact that Jisoo hung around after he left. She spent a few minutes looking down at her phone while you started cleaning up your station, but eventually she broke the somewhat awkward silence.

“Y/N,” she said gently, low enough so that no one else could hear her. “I was just thinking it might be best for you to tone it down a bit.”

“Tone it down?” you asked, turning and giving her a confused look.

“Clearly everyone here has gotten used to how friendly you are with Tae,” she began tentatively before her expression grew more serious. “But, now that he’s ‘dating’ me, they might think your close relationship with him is a little bit inappropriate.”

For a few seconds you just stood there staring at her in stunned silence, completely taken aback by the audacity of her implication. Out of the seven member-stylist pairs, you and Tae were undoubtedly the closest, but that had never been a problem before. Yes, you two had been dating for almost two months, and had been secretly in love with each other for three years, but you had done a remarkable job at keeping things outwardly platonic. If your relationship had ever been perceived as inappropriate, surely you would have been fired for it by now.

You were more than a little peeved by her comments, and were about to say something snarky to her that you would probably later regret, but before you had the chance to respond she received a phone call. She then quickly excused herself from the room, leaving her words to hang over you like a dark cloud.

At first you were just angry, thinking she had some nerve trying to stir up trouble and control your relationship with Tae. As the day wore on, though, and you continued mulling over her words and the greater situation, you grew increasingly frustrated as you slowly began to realize she might not have been completely off base with her observation.

The questions that began running through your mind were ones you found legitimately painful to contemplate. If you and Tae were never together and he had actually started dating someone else, would you have acted differently towards him? Would you have joked around with him less? Been a bit less familiar with him? The answers, you begrudgingly admitted to yourself after an hour of sulking, were all yes.

Even though it would have killed you to do it, you would have put some distance between yourself and him out of respect for his girlfriend and their relationship. Obviously, his ‘relationship’ with Jisoo was a complete farce, but no one else knew that. If you wanted it to stay that way, you realized you needed to play your part in all this just like he was playing his. And that part, sadly, was of the best friend who gets replaced by the girlfriend.

That very next day you began pulling back from him while you were at work, a process, you decided, was akin to removing a limb. Not wanting to make him feel guilty that the fake dating cover was affecting yet another aspect of your relationship, you said that Mrs. Choi was the one who told you to tone it down. She had made similar comments to you in the past so it was believable that she would bring it up again, especially given how rowdy you two had been the day before. Regardless, Tae was still upset when you told him you two shouldn’t talk or joke as much while you were working and asked him not to stop by the studio anymore in the afternoons.

You were upset too, devastated even, though you tried not to let it show for his sake. Not having those little moments with him scattered throughout the day made you feel lonelier than ever and made it hard to focus on anything other than the jealousy and resentment that had begun seeping into your soul. It also left the door wide open for the stream of intrusive thoughts that had begun trickling into your mind at a steadily-growing rate.

Despite having had a wonderful time with Tae over the weekend, your conversation with Eunji and Donghae, along with the very unpleasant thoughts and visions that had accompanied it, crept back into your mind as soon as you returned to Big Hit. As you stood alone in the studio, watching Tae and Jisoo walk off hand-in-hand to go get lunch, you could not help but feel incredibly stressed, not to mention unbelievably foolish, for sending your boyfriend into the open arms of a woman who wasn’t just good-looking, but who openly flaunted those good looks.

You were used to seeing Jisoo dress provocatively on stage and during photoshoots, but the way she began dressing while at work was something else entirely. She wore low-cut shirts that revealed a ton of cleavage and cropped ones that exposed her perfectly toned midriff. She wore jeans that were skin-tight and low-waisted and sometimes shamelessly allowed a bit of her strappy, lacey underwear to show. She also wore skirts that absolutely broke the ‘five finger rule’ and seemed to occasionally forget how important it was for her to cross her legs when she was sitting down while wearing them.

Never once did you actually see Tae’s gaze wander somewhere it shouldn’t, but just because you weren’t catching it, didn’t mean it wasn’t ever happening. Like Eunji had so astutely noted, he was still a guy. You could personally attest to his fervent admiration of the female anatomy, could write a whole essay on what he loved most about it using delightfully filthy direct quotes. The shamelessness with which he admitted he appreciated your body, even when you were doing the most innocent of things like washing the dishes, had once delighted you and boosted your confidence sky-high. Now, though, it had you feeling more insecure than ever; how could he not notice Jisoo’s body when she was serving it up on a silver platter?

Upon realizing she was trying to taunt you, if not flat out seduce him, you found yourself constantly worrying about what went on when they were together somewhere other than your studio. Was he less careful then about where he let his gaze wander? If his gaze did wander, did his mind then follow suit? With you not there as a constant reminder that what he was doing with Jisoo wasn’t supposed to be real, would he ever momentarily forget and let himself indulge in the fantasy of what she was so clearly offering him?

The idea of sharing these insecurities with Tae crossed your mind on more than one occasion, but each time you decided against it at the last minute. Telling him you were worried he was secretly checking her out or fantasizing about her felt like one step below accusing him of cheating. After seeing how absolutely devastated he was when you merely had a dream that he cheated, you were terrified of hurting him again like that, especially when he had given you zero legitimate reasons to doubt him.

He wasn’t looking at her inappropriately. He was still barely touching her, only giving the bare minimum amount of attention and affection. He was still coming home to you every night and telling you and showing you how much he loved and desired you. He told you he wanted to marry you and have a family with you, for fucks sake. He was giving you everything, honestly, absolutely everything.

It should have been enough to keep the doubts and worries and insecurities from completely overwhelming you.

But it wasn’t.

~~~

By the end of the third week, you were nearing the end of your now very frayed and fragile rope. With you and Tae no longer even acting like friends at work, the last two weeks had been infinitely worse than the first, though you hadn’t told him just how awful they had been. You hadn’t told him how many times you cried in the bathroom after you watched them leave together. You hadn’t told him how you started hyperventilating after Eunji asked if you thought Tae and Jisoo ever fucked in her recording studio. You hadn’t told him how it absolutely shattered your heart that one time she casually put her hand on his thigh and he didn’t immediately ask her to move it. You also hadn’t told him that you started having terrible dreams again, albeit not ones intense enough to make you cry and therefore wake him up.

Regardless, he still saw how down you were that Friday night and vowed to spoil you all weekend to cheer you up and show you how much he loved you. He absolutely delivered on that promise, cooking you elaborate dinners, singing to you while you cuddled together, putting on your favorite movies, making you come more times than you could honestly count, telling you in a million different ways how beautiful and perfect and wonderful he thought you were.

By Sunday evening your emotional cup, which had been all but emptied during the previous week, was once again full. You were feeling ready, or as ready as you could ever be, to endure one more final draining week before this nightmare was over.

But, then the ground shifted again.

After doing your nightly routine, you walked out of the bathroom and found Tae sitting on the bed, his shoulders slumped as he stared down at his phone.

“Everything OK?” you asked, ever-so-slightly concerned given that he had been laughing just two minutes ago.

“I just got a text from Jisoo,” he said flatly as he continued looking down at the device.

A beat of silence passed as a shiver went up your spine. There was absolutely no good reason for her to be contacting him this late.

“What does she want?” you questioned quietly, trying to keep your voice even.

Instead of responding, he simply held out his phone. You walked over and took it from him, a pit forming in your stomach at the way his eyes remained fixed on the floor. Nervously, you looked down to see she had sent a series of screenshots from a conversation she had apparently had with her own stylist, Seung. Their conversation was long and incredibly scattered, but there were a few messages from her that stood out right away.

“Ngl, you guys look super awkward together.”

“Poor boy seems like he’s afraid of you lol.”

“How long did you say you’ve been dating?”

Below the screenshots were two messages from Jisoo directly that instantly had your breath hitching and your heart plummeting.

[Jisoo 9:45 PM[ PDA rules are killing us.

[Jisoo 9:47 PM] We need to up our game or we’re fucked.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 42 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 2.4k

warnings: despair, just utter despair

Chapter 42: Far Too Late

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For several minutes, neither of you spoke. The only sound you heard was that of your own rapidly increasing heartbeat. As you stood there, staring down at his phone, the words on the screen slowly blurring together until not a single letter was distinguishable from the next, the contentment you had been filled with just moments ago drained out of you. In its place arose the now all too familiar sense of dread which had been haunting you every moment of every day.

Seeing Tae and Jisoo together these last few weeks had been agonizing. Just watching him hold her hand and hearing him call her Jagi had left you curled up in a ball, sobbing on the floor of the bathroom, so the idea of them being even more affectionate with one another was truly horrifying. As your mind filled with awful images of all the ways Tae and Jisoo could ‘up their game’, you waited with bated breath for him to say something, anything to calm you down and assure you that your worst fears were not about to be realized. Eventually, his voice did cut through the silence, but it was with the absolute last words you wanted to hear.

“She’s right,” he said quietly, his eyes still downcast.

“I am awkward and uncomfortable around her,” he admitted, sounding so guilty. “Far more than a boyfriend should be.”

“And, I-I don’t think Seung is the only person to have noticed,” he then added as he lifted his head and met your expectant gaze.

The room went silent again for a few moments as you anxiously waited for him to elaborate on that fateful statement.

“Jisoo and I had a meeting with Bang PD on Friday,” he confessed, his voice shaking with obvious nervousness. “He brought us in to talk about our upcoming public appearances like award shows and the Itaewon Class premier.”

“He wanted to set some ground rules for how we’ll interact with one another,” he went on. “I think he’s worried we’ll accidentally reveal our relationship or, rather, that Jisoo will reveal it with her usual antics.”

When he said that your mind instantly flashed with images from the Golden Disc Awards last year where Jisoo gave Tae a surprise kiss on the cheek and left that stupid blue lipstick mark. At the time a stunt like that was relatively harmless, albeit infuriating for you to witness, but she certainly couldn’t do something like that if they were trying to hide an actual ‘relationship’.

“The meeting was kind of tense, though,” he then said as he ran his hands through his hair. “He asked a lot of questions and kept looking at us really curiously and I don’t know. He just...he seemed suspicious, just like he was that first day we met with him.”

It took you a couple seconds to process all that he had just said, but when the weight of his admission finally sank in, your jaw dropped open in disbelief.

“You didn’t think to tell me about this meeting?” you asked, trying your best not to shout as you stared at him incredulously. “Before or after it took place?”

“I’m sorry, Jagi,” he replied sorrowfully. “I know it was wrong to keep it from you.”

“He called the meeting unexpectedly so I couldn’t have told you beforehand,” he then quickly explained. “But, afterwards...I just didn’t know what to say.”

“I thought maybe I was just being paranoid so I wanted some time to think about things before I told you,” he said, giving you a desperate, pleading look. “I didn’t want to worry you for no reason. You were already so sad when I got home.”

“But, seeing Jisoo’s conversation with Seung makes me think maybe it wasn’t just in my head and that he might actually be questioning our relationship,” he said, now looking genuinely fearful.

His words hung in the air between you, thick and heavy and suffocating. Over the last few weeks you had been so distracted watching Jisoo move in on your boyfriend that you’d almost forgotten the reason why this all started in the first place: to keep your big secret. The idea that Bang PD of all people might be doubting the legitimacy of their relationship was downright terrifying. Having your actual relationship be discovered would have been bad enough, but getting caught in an elaborate cover up of that relationship would be infinitely worse. Your career would be over, Tae’s would be in serious jeopardy, and your relationship would no doubt be subjected to all manner of scrutiny and criticism.

You couldn’t believe Tae hadn’t told you about this right away and that he had instead chosen to butter you up all weekend with attention and affection before dropping the bomb. You also couldn’t help but wonder if and when he would have told you if Jisoo hadn’t sent those texts. It was alarming how nonchalant he had been the last two days, how easily he was able to mask his emotions. You couldn’t deny that you felt betrayed, but before you let yourself get carried away with anger, something occurred to you: for the last few weeks you had also been hiding your true feelings so as not to upset him. The situations weren’t the exact same, but even still, you felt yourself softening ever-so-slightly. You knew he had good intentions, just like you did.

“Does Jisoo know you think Bang PD is suspicious?” you asked to break the silence, trying not to sound as hurt as you felt.

“We didn't specifically talk about it, but I think she got a similar vibe during the meeting,” he replied solemnly.

If Jisoo also thought Bang PD was questioning their relationship it could explain why Seung’s comments led her to reach out to Tae with the suggestion for them to ‘up their game’. And yet, as you looked back down at her messages, you felt a gnawing, uneasy feeling in your stomach. After watching her push the envelope for weeks with her subtle flirting, you simply could not shake the thought that she was using this as an excuse to cozy up to Tae and circumvent the rules, ones which were specifically put in place to protect the sanctity of your actual relationship. Whether she was doing it to milk all she could out of this once-in-a-lifetime situation with Tae or because she was legitimately trying to take him away, you didn’t know, but you knew you needed to speak up about it.

“Is upping your PDA really going to help?” you questioned, the slight edge in your voice evident by the grimace it drew from Tae. “Is it truly necessary?”

“It would make things look more believable,” he replied reluctantly as the pained expression he wore deepened.

“I know that, but I just…,” you began, not knowing exactly how to phrase what you were trying to say.

You took a deep, steadying breath to try and calm down before you spoke again.

“Could Jisoo be suggesting it for selfish reasons?” you finally asked. “Just so you’ll give her more attention?”

Tae looked at you for a long time after you spoke, his dark eyes searching yours as he seemed to be wrestling with his thoughts. You could tell he was a bit taken aback by your question. You supposed that made sense given this was the first time since the night of your dream that you admitted to having doubts about Jisoo and her motives. Still, you were surprised that this thought seemed not to have crossed his mind and were even more surprised by what he said next.

“I don’t think she would do that, Jagi,” he eventually said, his tone cautious.

“I know she did some hurtful things in the past, and that we were worried at first about trusting her, but she’s done everything we’ve asked of her so far,” he went on tentatively. “She’s followed all the rules.”

“I honestly think she’s just trying to help,” he concluded, giving you a hopeful look.

At the sound of his words, you felt a sharp pang in your chest. After weeks of holding it all in, weeks of being strong and suffering in silence, it hurt that he didn’t believe you when you finally, finally opened up to him and shared one of your worries. The fact that he defended Jisoo of all people only made the pain worse.

While she hadn’t technically violated any of the PDA rules, she had definitely acted in a way that was borderline inappropriate given that she knew you and Tae were together. It seemed obvious to you what she had been trying to do with her revealing clothes and lingering touches these past few weeks. You found it hard to believe that Tae hadn’t also noticed and couldn’t help but be a little upset and also slightly concerned that he hadn’t acknowledged it in any way.

For the briefest of moments, you allowed your mind to wander to a very dark place. You had not realized how close they had apparently grown over the last three weeks. The fact that she had earned his trust so quickly was incredibly unsettling and had you once again worrying about what they did together when you weren’t there. You also couldn’t help but wonder if the reason why he didn’t bring up her flirtatious behavior was because he liked the way it made him feel. That thought then led to another even more unpleasant one: that he was secretly excited to have an excuse to be more affectionate with her.

A second later, though, you were overcome by a deep sense of shame for having allowed those thoughts to enter your mind at all. Throughout all of this, Tae still had done nothing to give you legitimate reason to doubt him like this. He had done everything and anything possible to make sure you felt loved and desired at all times. He had even told you he wanted to marry you and have a family with you one day. His trust in your relationship and vision for your future together were crystal clear; the last thing you wanted to do was ruin everything with your insecurity. You loved him and trusted him wholeheartedly and weren’t going to let Jisoo get in the way of that.  

“If you believe her and think it will help then I trust you,” you replied, your voice catching a bit at the end.

Despite trusting Tae and knowing he would be doing it with good reason, it still hurt to know he was going to do more with Jisoo. He was going to touch her more tenderly, speak to her more softly; he was going to treat her like his actual lover. There was no doubt in your mind that watching it was going to be torture.

“It’s just a week, though, right?” you then added giving him a tight-lipped smile, trying to convince yourself that you were OK with this. “We can make it through one more week with a little extra PDA.”

The way his face crumpled when you said those words had your heart plummeting into your stomach. You hadn’t seen him look at you this guiltily since the night of your big fight when he realized he forgot your birthday.

“Jagi,” he started, his voice strained as his grief-stricken gaze met yours. “We’re going to have to keep doing this a little longer.”

And, just like that, the last bit of hope you had been clinging to disintegrated. The possibility of this nightmare extending beyond a month had always been there, but you had allowed yourself to live in denial of this fact in a desperate act of self preservation. Had you been aware all along of just how long you would need to endure this heartache, you probably would have given up weeks ago.

“How much longer?” you all but whispered.

“I don’t know,” he replied with a deep sigh. “Until the Big Hit Banquet maybe? Or just after?”

“We need Bang PD to actually see us together so we can convince him it's real,” he added quietly.

You felt the room spinning. The Big Hit Banquet was over a month away. You had only just mustered the strength to brave another week of your current misery, but now here you were being asked to increase both the intensity and duration of your suffering. The thought alone was almost more than you could bear and you felt your body beginning to give out under the crushing weight of it all.

“I’m sorry, Jagi,” he then said, sounding so completely and utterly broken that you felt his pain in your own soul. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I know it’s going to hurt,” he went on shakily. “But, we have to keep going.”

“We can’t let all of this have been for nothing,” he concluded despondently as he slumped his head back into his hands.

At that moment, there were so many things you wanted to say.

That the pain was already unbearable.

That you honestly didn’t know if you could handle this anymore.

That if you kept going and irrevocably damaged your relationship it all would have been for nothing anyway.

All those words were right there, stuck in your throat, threatening to suffocate you. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you struggled to force them out, but every time they came close to passing your lips your body failed you and all that came out was an inaudible gasp. Silently, you begged him to look up and just see it, the sheer panic that was enveloping you, but his head remained in his hands, his eyes fixed on the floor in a blank, lifeless stare.

The two of you stayed there like that for a long time, you not saying what needed to be said, Tae not seeing what needed to be seen, until eventually your crippling anxiety subsided and was replaced with empty resignation.

He was right: you had to keep going.

It was far too late now to turn back.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 43 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 4.1k

warnings: cursing, implied smut, possible infidelity

Chapter 43: Slipped My Mind

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The new ‘rules’ you established that Sunday night were much more vague than the ones that were initially agreed upon. They focused more on what Tae and Jisoo shouldn’t do, rather than what they should do, which left a frighteningly large gray area for you all to navigate through. You hated their ambiguous nature, hated how they made you acutely aware of your lack of control in this whole situation, but you were, begrudgingly, the one to suggest they be designed this way. The unavoidable truth was that having a strict and limited set of predefined ways for Tae and Jisoo to interact was what made things seem forced and awkward in the first place. If they wanted their relationship to be believable, their interactions needed to be less calculated and more natural. They needed to be able to react organically to the situations they found themselves in and that meant not always knowing ahead of time what they were going to do.

Things like kissing on the lips or touching in a way that was overtly sexual were obviously not OK, but other than that nothing was really set in stone. You gave Tae permission to be more physically affectionate and to do more cute coupley things, however, you couldn’t bring yourself to explicitly outline specific things he should do. Ultimately, you ended up telling him to just use his judgement and do whatever he thought necessary and appropriate to make it look real. Your only stipulation was that he be the one to dictate any interactions that were more intimate in nature. If he initiated something, Jisoo could then go along with it, otherwise she was supposed to abide by the original rules. Despite Tae’s trust in her altruistic intentions, you still had your doubts. The last thing you wanted was her thinking she now had the freedom to do whatever she wanted with your boyfriend.

Tae asked if you wanted him to check with you before he did anything with her to which you honestly replied ‘No’. The idea of him spending time contemplating what to do somehow seemed more painful than him simply doing things spur of the moment when he saw an opportunity to put on a show. When it came to explaining what they had done together after the fact, Tae did not ask if that’s what you wanted, he told you that’s what he would do. He said there couldn’t be any secrets between you two and, although you knew it would hurt you both to talk through their interactions, you agreed it was the right thing to do. And, finally, he made you promise that if he ever did anything that you felt crossed the line that you would tell him right away.

Throughout your entire conversation, you could just feel the guilt and torment radiating off of him. It was then that you truly recognized and acknowledged the heartbreak he was suffering as a result of all this. It was different from what you were enduring, but it was no less severe. He was being forced to hurt you, the woman he loved and wanted to spend the rest of his life with, and the deep wounds this left him with were ones you began to fear might never heal. With each passing second, you felt your resolve to be strong for him deepening; you could not bear to cause him even more pain.

After you and Tae talked through everything and decided what you wanted to do moving forward, he called Jisoo to let her know. Initially, he stayed with you in the bedroom, holding your hand and gently stroking your thumb as he spoke with her, but eventually he excused himself and left the room. You felt the tiniest twinge of anxiety watching him leave, wondering why he needed to talk to her in private, but you pushed it from your mind. You trusted that he had a good reason and that he would tell you what you needed to know afterwards. He was on the phone with her for a long time, though, so long that you eventually climbed into bed to wait for him.

You were half asleep when he finally came back into the room, sighing deeply as he closed the door behind him. A few minutes later he crawled into bed beside you. He wrapped his arms around you like always and pulled you against his chest, enveloping you in his warm, comforting embrace. One of his hands soon found yours, his fingers carefully lacing with your own as he peppered your shoulder with little kisses.

“I love you, Jagi,” he whispered after a moment. “I love you so much. More than anything in the whole world.”

“I meant it when I gave you this,” he went on as he gently twirled the couple’s ring around your finger with his thumb. “I will always love you.”

“Please don’t ever forget that,” he then said, the slightest tremble and hint of fearfulness in his voice. “No matter what.”

“Baby, I won’t,” you assured him. “I promise.”

Bringing his hand to your lips, you sealed that promise with a tender kiss to the finger on which he wore his matching couple’s ring.

“I love you and I love us and that’s never going to change,” you added softly.

“We’re going to get through this,” you said finally, trying your best to be brave for him. “Everything is going to be OK.”

~~~

The following morning, phase two of the plan to keep your secret, stay together, and save your relationship began. Tae sent out a text to the other guys letting them know what was going on so they wouldn’t be surprised when they saw him and Jisoo acting differently. Unsurprisingly, Namjoon called Tae immediately after receiving the text. From what you could gather from the half of the conversation you heard, the older man was a bit wary of this change of plans, but agreed you couldn’t risk backing off now if Bang PD was legitimately suspicious. As you sat there in the kitchen listening to Tae explain things, you got a much needed bit of assurance knowing your guardian angel was onboard with everything.

Tae ‘upped their game’ little by little so as to lessen the blow and give you time to adjust to their new dynamic which you greatly appreciated. Despite the fact that they were doing more together than they had been before, you actually felt your level of anxiety decrease slightly. The fact that you and him were regularly talking about what they were doing was helping significantly in terms of quelling your fears. You still weren’t divulging all of your deep seeded insecurities, but you were being more candid than you had been during the first three weeks of this ordeal. However, no matter what Tae did or said in the evenings to assure you of his love and commitment, you did still have moments when you were unable to combat the little doubts that infiltrated your mind.

On Monday, Tae fed Jisoo part of his meal while they had lunch down in the café. Eunji happened to be there at the time and had sneakily taken a photo and then sent it to you. As you sat there by yourself in the studio staring down at the photo, you couldn’t help but be overcome with bitterness. You and Tae would never get to do something like that. Obviously, he wouldn’t be able to take you or Jisoo out to an actual restaurant without being swamped by fans and media. But, inside of the Big Hit building, he did have the freedom and protection to openly be with his partner...so long as that partner was Jisoo and not you.

On Tuesday, they took a bunch of selfies together. They spent several minutes throwing out different poses, giggling the entire time and clearly having fun. They took one while doing Tae’s signature ‘V’ over the eye pose. Another showed them making silly faces with their tongues sticking out. In the last one they took, Jisoo gave Tae a kiss on the cheek while he scrunched his face up all cutely. Jisoo actually made that one the background of her phone, but thankfully Tae kept the photo of Tannie as the background of his. For that, you were extremely grateful; you didn’t think you could handle it if you saw her face every time he turned on his phone.

On Wednesday, he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and pulled her to his chest while hanging out in the studio. She slowly slid her hands down his arms and then carefully intertwined their fingers. Off to the side, you watched them through the mirror, noting how frustratingly perfect they looked together. They were both so beautiful, so captivating and alluring. You couldn't help but worry what people would say when it was time to publicly reveal your relationship years from now. Surely they would be surprised, and maybe even disappointed, to see Tae with someone as plain as you.

On Thursday, he kissed her on the forehead. Out of everything he had done, this was by far the most painful to witness. Although she had given him kisses to the cheek almost daily for the last month, this was the first time he had ever touched her with his lips. The gesture somehow seemed more intimate than if he had kissed her on the mouth. A kiss to the lips could be mistaken for nothing more than lust, but a kiss to the forehead meant so much more. It signified adoration and affection, emotions that were only supposed to be reserved for you. The worst part wasn’t just that he did it, but that he did it with a tenderest of smiles on his face.

By the time Friday rolled around, you were emotionally exhausted, significantly more so than you had been at the end of any of the previous three grueling weeks. Nothing Tae did had crossed the line, all of their interactions had been relatively tame and innocent, but the way he had done things had been hard to stomach.

It just looked so real.

It was both impressive and unsettling how quickly he seemed to have flipped the switch. Just last week it looked awkward and forced every time he touched her or spoke to her, but now it seemed like everything came naturally to him. You knew the ease with which he slipped into the character of her doting boyfriend was a reflection of his acting skills, but nonetheless, it was at times hard to watch. There had been a handful of instances throughout the week where you had, for just a split second, forgotten he was pretending.

To say you were ready for the weekend was a massive understatement and thankfully the day had gone by quickly and without incident. Due to his hectic rehearsal schedule, you actually hadn’t seen Tae once all day since leaving the apartment. Normally, that would have bummed you out, but not seeing Tae meant not seeing Jisoo and you weren’t about to complain about that. However, your hopes of having a completely Jisoo-free day were dashed just as you were getting ready to head home.

After attending a meeting with the other stylist’s regarding the upcoming Big Hit family photoshoot, you entered the studio to find Jisoo perched on Tae’s chair. By now, you were accustomed to this sight. She waited here for him almost every day so they could walk out to the parking garage together. Seeing them leave hand-in-hand was an unpleasant way to end each work day, but you were comforted knowing that the moment he said goodbye to her, he was once again unequivocally yours. As she drove away back to whatever sad life awaited her, he drove home to you and your life together.

Over the course of the last month, Jisoo had interacted with you only sparingly, something which you found surprising and also slightly unnerving. You had expected her to be constantly giving you dirty looks or throwing out little jabs, anything to use the precarious situation against you, but she had contained whatever resentment you were convinced she still held towards you. When she was with you and Tae in the studio, she had mostly ignored your existence, instead focusing all her attention on Tae. Your most notable exchange had occurred early on when she informed you that your close relationship with Tae might be viewed as inappropriate, but since then you hadn’t spoken more than a few pleasantries to one another.

This week, though, there had been a noticeable change in her demeanor towards you. Before, she seemed to have genuinely tried to tone things down when you were around, but now she appeared to have no qualms about flaunting her ‘relationship’ right in front of you. While she did refrain from initiating anything more intimate, she immediately went all in on whatever Tae did, taking a mile when he gave her an inch with absolutely no regard for your feelings whatsoever. She wore a sweet, innocent smile the majority of the time, but every now and then she dropped the façade and flashed you a smug, satisfied smirk. She was clearly loving the new rules, absolutely eating up all the attention and affection Tae gave her, and she wanted you to know. It was infuriating to stand by and watch her, to know she had gotten exactly what she wanted, but you had no choice but to grin and bear it.

As you walked over to your station to pack up your bag, you kept your eyes glued to your phone in an attempt to deter Jisoo from attempting to speak to you. Initially, your plan was successful; for ten whole minutes she pretended not to have noticed that you entered the vicinity. However, her shrill voice eventually cut through the peaceful silence.

“I must say, I’m surprised you’re OK with all this,” she said, her tone annoyingly light. “I’m not sure I would be able to sit back and watch my boyfriend be all over another woman.”

“You must really trust him,” she went on casually.

At last, the claws have come out.

“I do,” you replied evenly. “I know he’s only doing it because he loves me and wants to protect our relationship.”

“Still, doesn’t it bother you when you see us together here at work?” she asked, her voice dripping with obviously fake concern. “When you watch him hold me or kiss me?”

No, it doesn’t bother me. It fucking kills me.

“Not one bit,” you said nonchalantly, refusing to give her the satisfaction of knowing her words had gotten under her skin. “I know it doesn’t mean anything.”

“He still comes home to me every night,” you continued, a hint of smugness now in your voice as your courage surged. “He cooks me dinner, cuddles with me on the couch, makes love to me in our bed, and then falls asleep with me in his arms.”

“So, no, it doesn’t bother me when I see him playing pretend with you,” you stated triumphantly.

She seemed genuinely surprised by the boldness of your statement and you relished the stunned expression she momentarily wore. However, in an instant it was gone and she was back sporting her usual smirk.

“Well, I’m glad to know you’re OK with everything,” she went on in a sickly sweet voice.

“I was worried you might be upset that he and I spent yesterday afternoon alone in my recording lab,” she then added, barely able to contain the glee in her voice as she spoke.

Upon hearing her words, you felt the rush of confidence you’d just experienced begin slowly draining out of you. Like every other day this week, last night you and Tae had talked through his day and he’d let you know everything that had happened between him and Jisoo. He had mentioned the forehead kiss and a couple other small interactions like hugs and holding hands, but he hadn’t mentioned anything about being alone with her in her recording lab. Finding yourself completely caught off guard, you simply stood there in silence, trying to gather your thoughts as you began imagining them together on the couch in that cozy, dimly-lit room.

“Oh, he didn’t tell you?” she asked, feigning surprise when you didn’t respond.

“It must have just slipped his mind,” she continued innocently. “He was really tired when he left yesterday.”

The clear insinuation of her words had you snapping back to reality, but before you could say anything Tae walked into the studio, his big, boxy smile shining brightly. He came over and gave Jisoo a hug, but shot you a quick wink behind her back. Under normal circumstances that little secret gesture would have made you giddy, but right now, after the conversation you and Jisoo had just had, it made your insides churn as an awful thought popped into your head.

What if he does things behind my back too?

You hated yourself for even thinking that, but you couldn’t deny that Jisoo’s words had shaken you. It was clear that you and Tae needed to talk, but you knew you couldn’t afford to get into it right now so you gave him a small smile in return and hoped he wouldn’t notice that it didn’t reach your eyes.

“We need to get going,” Jisoo then said, breaking away from his hug and instead linking her arm with his. “We have dinner reservations at 6:00, remember?”

“Oh, uh, right,” he said, clearing his throat as he grabbed his jacket off of his chair.

“Bye, Y/N,” he then added casually as she began tugging him towards the door. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

As you watched them leave, you began replaying your conversation with Jisoo, trying to stay calm and not let your mind wander to dark places. Not a minute after they were gone, though, your phone buzzed in your pocket.

[Taehyung 4:34 PM] ‘See you on Monday’

[Taehyung 4:34 PM] As if I could actually go two whole days without you.

[Taehyung 4:35 PM] I would die of cuddle and kiss withdrawal.

[Taehyung 4:35 PM] I’ll see you at home soon, sweetheart 💜

As you reread his messages, swooning at the new nickname, you felt yourself relax as you let out the breath you had been holding. Surely there was an explanation for what Jisoo said, the most likely of which being that she straight up lied to you. She had clearly been trying to rile you up, but after you shut down her initial attacks she got desperate and started spewing nonsense. Once you talked to Tae, he would confirm this and everything would be fine. Shaking off the rest of your negative thoughts, you finished packing up and headed home.

When you got there, you were only further convinced that Jisoo was full of crap. After quietly entering the apartment, you crept towards the kitchen and heard Tae starting to make dinner while talking to who you could only assume was Tannie.

I know you missed Mommy today. I missed her too. I snuck down to the studio during one of our rehearsal breaks just so I could peek through the door and see her. She was working on my outfit for the Big Hit family photoshoot and she pouted so adorably when the sewing machine got jammed. I wanted so badly to walk in there and kiss her pouty lips, but obviously I couldn’t do that. You know the rules: no kissing Mommy at work. She’s going to be home soon, though, and then we’ll get to see her all weekend and get all the kisses and all the cuddles too.

Those simply could not be the words of someone who was hiding things from you.

Not wanting to spoil the absolutely lovely mood he’d set with that cute soliloquy, you decided to wait until after dinner to bring up your conversation with Jisoo. Of course, immediately after dinner was over you two had not one but two servings of dessert, the first one hot and messy right there on the dining room table and the second slow and passionate between the satin sheets of your bed.

It wasn’t until later on, after you’d showered, together of course, and gotten into bed that you finally had the chance to ask him about what Jisoo had said. You were fairly certain she had lied, or that she had misrepresented the situation somehow so as to give you the wrong impression, but you just wanted to get clarity from Tae so you could stop worrying.

“Tae?” you began to get his attention.

He hummed in reply as he snuggled you closer and burrowed his face in your hair.

“Jisoo said something today about you guys spending yesterday afternoon alone in her recording lab,” you said carefully. “Did she make that up?”

The few seconds during which he hesitated to answer you were cause enough for slight concern, but it was the way his body tensed up that had you instantly on edge. All at once, the calm, happy cocoon he’d had you wrapped in all evening began unraveling. It was a simple question, one which shouldn’t have elicited this kind of guarded response from him.

“No, actually she didn’t,” he replied, an unmistakable hint of trepidation in his voice. "We were in there."

“I’m sorry I forgot to tell you,” he then added guiltily.

You forgot or you purposefully didn’t tell me?

You couldn’t help but ask yourself this question. Although Tae could be forgetful at times, this was a pretty important thing to have forgotten, especially when it happened only hours before you talked. An uncomfortable silence then settled over the two of you when he didn’t elaborate on his admission or explain the situation further.

“What were you guys doing in there?” you eventually questioned as nonchalantly as possible so as not to convey your growing unease.

Again, there was the briefest of pauses before he responded which caused your stomach to drop.

“She said she needed to stop by and pick something up after lunch,” he answered tentatively. “But then she started playing some songs from her upcoming album and I got stuck in there for a while.”

“I’m sorry again that I didn’t mention it yesterday,” he went on quickly as he hugged you to him a little more tightly. “It just slipped my mind.”

“It’s OK,” you said quietly. “Thanks for telling me now.”

As you laid there, for the first time feeling a bit suffocated by his warm embrace rather than comforted by it, you debated what more you should say. The idea of Jisoo dragging him in there for one thing only to force him to listen to her songs was believable; she was always trying to show off for him in one way or another. If he had told you about this upfront yesterday, you wouldn’t have been nearly as upset as you were right now. While you didn’t love the idea of them being alone together behind a closed door, you trusted him in that situation. At least, you thought you did.

You wanted desperately to believe that he had truly just forgotten to tell you, but the sinking feeling in your stomach had you doubting that theory. Assuming he had purposefully kept this information to himself, the best case scenario was that he was afraid he had accidentally crossed the line by being in there alone with her and didn’t want to upset you. It would still have been wrong of him not to tell you, but at least he would have had good intentions. The worst case scenario, though, was legitimately too painful to contemplate: that he had knowingly and intentionally crossed the line while in there but didn’t want you to know.

With all your might, you tried to force that last heartbreaking thought from your mind. Tae loved you. He was only spending time with her because he loved you and wanted to keep you safe. He wanted to marry you and have a family with you and spend the rest of his life with you.

He would never cheat on you.

Right?

Not sure if there were any words that could express the jumbled mess of thoughts and emotions you were currently dealing with, you ultimately ended up saying nothing more. Whether Tae didn’t realize you were actually not OK at the moment, or he noticed but didn’t want to address it, you weren’t sure, but a few minutes later he reached over and turned off the lamp on the bedside table.

“Goodnight, Jagi,” he whispered. “I hope you have sweet dreams.”

“Night, Tae,” you called back softly, knowing with absolute certainty that any dreams you had, assuming you slept at all, would be anything but sweet.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 44 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 4k

warnings: cursing, sexting, bondage, implied sex

A/N:  So I realized the last couple chapters have been super angsty and depressing and decided we needed to have a bit of fluffy, smutty fun for a change. Rest assured, this was but a respite from the heartbreak. The big angst is still coming. But, for the time being, I hope you enjoy Y/N and Tae being super cute and incredibly hot for each other :

Chapter 44: The Best Boy

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It was nearly 2 AM and you were still awake, nothing but the sound of Tannie’s soft snores and Tae’s occasional mutterings to break the otherwise suffocating silence.

You’d say you spent the last several hours tossing and turning, but that would be a lie; it was impossible to toss, turn, or really move at all whilst in Kim Taehyung’s sleepy clutches. He’d fallen asleep rather quickly, leaving you alone with your tumultuous thoughts, something which you were trying desperately not to resent him for. The situation was uncomfortably reminiscent of the night in which this whole fake dating fiasco began: Tae beside you sleeping peacefully while you laid there wide awake, your mind racing. After hours spent contemplating everything - what you were told, what you believed, how you felt, what you should do - you had figured out precisely nothing.

With a defeated sigh, you decided you couldn’t stay in bed any longer. Gently extracting yourself from Tae’s koala bear embrace and stuffing your pillow into his arms instead, you quietly slipped from the bedroom. After turning on the light in the living room, you went over to one of the couches and collapsed down onto it, your head instantly falling into your hands. You don’t know how long you sat there, staring blankly ahead as you sifted through your endless thoughts, but eventually something on the bookshelf in front of you caught your eye.

It was a framed picture of Tae’s phone that showed his background set to the first photo you’d ever taken together, the one where he was trying to eat your pigtail. Since he obviously couldn’t have that photo be the background of his phone all the time, he figured having a picture of what it would look like was the next best thing. He gave it to you a week or so after you got back from America, calling it a ‘because I love you’ gift. You cracked up when you pulled it out of the bag, telling him it would have been easier if he just got you a framed picture of the photo itself, but he said that would have been too boring. It was such a silly, sweet, thoughtful gift, something that was so incredibly Tae. Looking at it now, you were reminded not only of how much Tae loved you, but of the infinite number of ways, big and small, that he went about expressing that love.

Him giving you the couple’s ring that matched his grandmother’s ring to assure you of his commitment. The fact that he made coffee for you in the mornings even though he didn’t drink it. How affectionate and passionate and generous he was when you were intimate. The way he kept the apartment slightly warmer than he probably wanted because he knew you were always cold. How he shared his vision for your future together and spoke of marriage and children without the slightest bit of doubt or hesitancy. When he pretended to be full because he knew how much you wanted the last dumpling. How often he lavished you with genuine praise, saying you were beautiful, smart, talented, strong, the woman of his dreams. How he spent three years writing you the most beautiful love song, one which he often softly sang to you at night as you were falling asleep.

Laying down on the couch, you pulled out your phone and started playing the original demo version of ‘Sweet Night’ Tae had given you. Once he started ‘dating’ Jisoo, his plan for re-recording the song without her on backing vocals unfortunately went out the window. It would make no sense for him to kick her off the song if recording it together is what led them to date in the first place. It was frustrating that she would be on the official version, but you had this one which you absolutely loved and that was enough for you.

As you lay there listening to Tae’s soft, soothing voice, memories from the summer when they were recording this song together washed over you. It had been an extremely confusing and difficult time for you, one marked by many sleepless, tear-filled nights. When you thought back to all the most heartbreaking moments, though, you realized there was an undeniable common theme:

Jisoo bending the truth to fit her own twisted narrative.

How she led you to believe Tae was taking her on a date when they were actually attending a dinner meeting with numerous other people.

How she pretended he had given her the dark chocolate-covered strawberries even though he had actually ordered them to go so he could give them to you.

How she made it seem like he was busy and not spending time with you because they were together when in reality he had been hard at work producing the song he wrote to confess his love to you.

Suddenly, the idea that you’d questioned Tae’s faithfulness for even a second seemed completely absurd. Whatever the reason for him not telling you about their time in her recording lab, whether because he truly did just forget or because he felt guilty about being in there at all, it was obvious now that Jisoo had purposefully misconstrued the situation. She wanted you to have doubts and to accuse him of cheating, knowing how absolutely devastated he would be if you did so. She wanted to drive a wedge between you and him, just like she did over the summer, and ruin your relationship.

Why? Because she was jealous, plain and simple. You had a committed, loving, absolutely wonderful partner and she was jealous. You didn't blame her, you had once been jealous of her when you thought they were together, but the way she was going about dealing with her envy was both cruel and pathetic.

But, no longer were you going to sit back and take it. No longer were you going to be intimidated by her or let yourself be poisoned by her toxicity.

It was time to stand up for yourself and fight fire with fire. If she wanted to shamelessly revel in and openly flaunt her fake relationship, then you would shamelessly revel in and openly flaunt your real one, in all it’s fluffy, smutty glory. You would show her, once and for all, that Tae was wholly and unequivocally yours.

With a newfound sense of calm and purpose, you rose from the couch and headed back into the bedroom, determined to get a good night’s sleep so you could begin taking your life back tomorrow. Climbing onto the bed, you found Tae had completely wrapped himself around your pillow, a sight which was painfully adorable. You tried gently prying it out of his grasp, but he was holding it with both his arms and his legs and it wouldn’t budge. Pulling a little harder now, it was just beginning to come free from his hold when suddenly he clutched it back tightly against his chest.

“No,” he mumbled sleepily.

“Mine,” he then added after you gave the pillow another tug, his words just barely understandable. “My Jagi.”

In that moment, you thought for sure your heart would burst. Even in his sleep, he called you his.

“Tae,” you whispered as you brushed his hair back from his face. “Tae.”

It took a minute of trying to gently rouse him before he finally started to stir.

“Hmm?” he hummed, clearly disoriented after being woken up in the middle of night.

“I left the bed for a few minutes and now you’re cuddling my pillow,” you whispered, smiling as you watched the realization hit him.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he muttered as he let go of your pillow and put it back by your head.

“It’s Ok,” you said back with a giggle. “I just thought maybe you’d want to go back to cuddling me?

“Most definitely,” he replied as he held his arms open.

Scooting over to take up the space previously occupied by your pillow, you let him envelope you in his arms and pull you to his chest.

“Much better,” he said softly as he nuzzled his face into your neck. “My Jagi is back where she belongs.”

“Yes,” you called back quietly, already beginning to feel sleepy. “Yes, I am.”

~~~

You woke the following morning to the feeling of Tae pressing a feather-light kiss against your temple. From there, his lips made their way to your forehead, the tip of your nose, the apple of your cheek, and every other inch of your face. You pretended to still be asleep as long as you could, but when his lips finally found yours you were unable to contain your smile any longer.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he said sweetly.

“I’m not beautiful right now,” you mumbled sleepily, your eyes still closed. “My face is puffy and my hair is messy and I have eye oogies.”

“Your eye oogies make you especially beautiful,” he said with a laugh before kissing the corner of your eye, precisely where the offending oogies were located.

Finally opening your eyes, you found him lying beside you, gazing at you with the most adoring smile. In the soft light streaming in from the window, he looked nothing short of angelic, his fluffy, sleep-mussed hair framing his handsome face. No matter how many nights you spent together, you would never get used to waking up to this view.  

“You were in my dream last night,” he admitted shyly a moment later.

“Yea?” you questioned, loving the little blush that he was now sporting. “What did you dream about?”

He nervously bit his lower lip and looked away for a moment before responding.

“Umm, I might have dreamed that we were in the backyard of our theoretical future house playing with our theoretical future kids,” he said bashfully as his cheeks grew even redder.

Upon hearing his words, you felt the biggest, dopiest smile spread across your face. That might just be the most adorable, wonderful thing he’s ever said to you.

“Ok, you are too freaking cute,” you said, gazing at him with heart eyes.

“How many kids did we have?” you then asked, genuinely curious to know what his subconscious thought up.

“Honestly, I’m not sure,” he admitted with a laugh. “They were running all over the place so it was hard to get an accurate count.”

“Oh dear,” you said with a laugh of your own. “We had so many that you couldn’t even count them?”

“Theoretically speaking, it appears so,” he admitted, giving you a little smirk.

If there was any residual doubt in your mind after last night’s epiphany, it was gone now. The man literally had dreams where you had a family together, that’s how sure he was of your future. You were now more determined than ever to stand up to Jisoo and fight for Tae, your relationship, and that beautiful future he saw with you. And, you knew just how you wanted to do it.

While you and him spent the day lounging around and binging episodes of your new favorite show on Netflix, you secretly planned a special surprise for him for the following evening. It was one which you believed he would thoroughly enjoy and also one which would help make it crystal clear to Jisoo who exactly Tae belonged to. Since she had obviously failed miserably in her attempt to seduce him and have him lusting after her, you decided you were going to show her how it’s done. You were going to make it painfully obvious to her what it looked like when Kim Taehyung had it bad for someone, that someone being you.

Wanting him to be all the more eager tomorrow night, you exerted an enormous amount of self control and kept things PG all day long. That night, when Tae began kissing your neck and running his fingers along the waistband of your leggings while you were cuddling, his way of letting you know he was in the mood, you feigned being too tired to do anything. Given you rarely ever turned down an invitation for intimacy, you thought he might be surprised or disappointed by your reaction, but if he was he didn’t let it show. Always the gentleman, he immediately stopped what he was doing and reverted back to being a cuddly teddy bear, holding you affectionately but respectfully. It was extremely hard to turn him down, especially since his little kisses and touches had definitely gotten you in the mood, but you remained strong, committed to your plan.

You successfully warded off his advances the following morning too, though, it was certainly easier said than done. The two of you had an extremely healthy and active sex life, having literally not gone a single day without some form of intimacy since the night of your dinner date. Going almost 48 hours with nothing more than a few heated kisses was rough and made you all the more excited for this evening’s surprise.

You began putting your plan into action that afternoon once Tae left the apartment to head over to the dorms. The guys were having a meeting and then Jin was making dinner which meant he would be gone for several hours. As soon as he left, you got dressed and headed out to the mall, knowing exactly what store you wanted to visit and exactly what you planned on buying.

A couple hours later, you were back in the apartment, staring down at your purchases with a look of immense satisfaction. The lingerie set before you was incredibly sexy; it was gray, which was Tae’s favorite color, lacy, strappy, and almost entirely see-through. Up until recently, you never in your wildest dreams could have imagined wearing something so scandalous, but being with Tae had given you so much self-confidence. He made you feel like an absolute goddess whenever you were intimate, like every inch of you was beautiful and perfect. You genuinely liked the way you looked while wearing the set and were all but certain Tae would too.

After showering and shaving every last inch of your body, you did your hair in some soft curls and put on a bit of light, natural makeup. You then slipped the lingerie on, sat down on the bed, and texted Tae.

[5:11 PM] I decided to get out of the apartment for a bit and do some shopping.

You snapped a photo of the Victoria’s Secret bag sitting on the floor and sent it along with a winky face. Tae’s response came almost instantaneously.

[Taehyung 5:12 PM] Victoria’s Secret?! 😳

[Taehyung 5:13 PM] Is my Jagi going to put on a fashion show for me tonight? 👀

[5:14 PM] I might.

[5:14 PM] If you’re a good boy.

[Taehyung 5:15 PM] I will be. I’ll be such a good boy. The best boy.

[Taehyung 5:16 PM] Can I get a teaser photo? Pretty please? 🙏🏻

Laughing at him calling it a ‘teaser photo’ like this was some kind of BTS comeback, you laid down and propped yourself up on one elbow, resting your chin in your hand. You held your phone out in front of you and angled it so as to show off your cleavage and reveal a bit of the bra. Biting your lip ever so slightly, you then took a photo and hit send.

[Taehyung 5:20 PM] Fuck. Sweetheart.

[Taehyung 5:21 PM] You are gorgeous. Literally the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen in my entire life.

[Taehyung 5:21 PM] Please let me see the rest of your beautiful body. PLEASE.

[5:22 PM] I will…

[5:22 PM] …once you get home.

[Taehyung 5:24 PM] You are minx. A siren. A seductive temptress.

[Taehyung 5:24 PM] And fuck if I don’t love it.

Getting up onto your knees, you took and sent another photo, this one from the side showing the thin straps of the panties and the curve of your ass.

[Taehyung 5:30 PM] That’s it. I’m leaving.

[Taehyung 5:30 PM] I don’t need the dinner Jin-hyung is making.

[Taehyung 5:31 PM] There is clearly a delicious meal waiting for me at home.

[Taehyung 5:32 PM] I told the guys there was an emergency which technically wasn’t a lie.

[Taehyung 5:32 PM] The emergency is that my sinfully hot girlfriend is alone in our bed right now wearing lingerie.

[Taehyung 5:33 PM] I’ll be home soon, Jagi.

[5:34 PM] I’ll be here waiting for you 💜

Twenty minutes later, which you noted with a chuckle was less time than it usually took to get home from the dorms, you heard the apartment door open. Not a minute after that, the door to the bedroom opened and Tae came bursting in, breathing heavily after clearly rushing to get to you.

You were sitting on the edge of the bed, legs crossed and a glass of wine in one hand. Wanting to keep the mystery as long as possible, you had thrown on the lingerie set’s matching satin robe. It barely came mid-thigh, though, and Tae was immediately drinking in the sight of your bare legs. Setting your glass of wine down on the nightstand, you stood up and strode over to him. His hands reflexively came out to rest on your waist, but you stopped him at the last second.

“No touching,” you said coyly, wagging your finger at him. “At least not until you prove you’re a good boy.”

He gave you an adorable pout as he slowly withdrew his hands.

“How do I do that?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

“Strip,” you then said simply.

Clearly caught off guard by your bold demand, his eyes went wide for a moment before his gaze darkened and a sly smirk spread across his face. Slowly, and without breaking eye contact, he began removing his clothes. Once he was down to just his boxers, you instructed him to lay down on the bed. You then pulled two scarves out of the top drawer of your dresser and held them up for him to see.

“If you want to see the fashion show, you have to be tied up,” you said flirtatiously.

His pupils were blown out wide now, his expression one of unmistakable lust. The two of you had never experimented with any form of bondage before, but it was more than obvious that this was something he found arousing.

“Are you OK with that?” you then asked more seriously, making sure he was actually comfortable with what you had just proposed.

“Yes,” he replied instantly. “Absolutely.”

“You can do whatever you want with me, Jagi,” he added as his tongue came out to wet his lips.

“Oh I will,” you said with a mischievous smirk.

Once he was fully restrained, you began the fashion show. You started by untying your robe and slowly letting it fall off one shoulder, giving him a tiny glimpse of the gray fabric beneath. After shrugging it off the other shoulder, the robe then pooled around your waist, exposing the entirety of the nearly see-through bra. You stayed like that for a little bit, letting the robe slip lower a couple times only to pull it back up at the last second, each time causing him to mutter a breathy curse.

The way he licked and bit his lips when you finally let the robe fall to the floor, shamelessly letting his gaze linger on the strappy panties that covered close to nothing, sent a wave of arousal through you. However, nothing turned you on more than him pleading in a deep, husky voice for you to turn around and let him see you from behind. You obliged, but glanced back to find him looking utterly transfixed by the way the lacy fabric hugged your curves.

After striking a number of naughty poses at the foot of the bed, you eventually climbed onto it and crawled towards him on all fours until you were hovering over him. You then proceeded to tease him with hot, open-mouthed kisses to his neck and chest and stomach until he begged for you to untie him, whining that he needed to touch you. You sat down and straddled him as you contemplated whether or not to let him go, relishing the low groans you drew from him every time you gently swiveled your hips. After a few minutes of torturing him like that, you decided he had been a good boy after all and finally released him.

The second he was free he pounced, pinning you to the bed with the hungriest look in his eye you had ever seen. The beast inside him now unleashed, he spent the rest of the evening absolutely devouring you, worshiping your body in every way imaginable and wringing pleasure from you until you truly couldn't take it anymore. It was by far the most intense and erotic sexual experience you’d ever shared together, one that was certainly more than you bargained for, but which had definitely accomplished your ultimate goal.

“Jagi, sweetheart,” Tae said between pants as you laid together afterwards, limbs tangled in a sweaty, messy heap. “You’ve ruined me.”

“How am I supposed to act professionally around you tomorrow after this?” he then questioned, more to himself than to you.

“I’m going to be sitting there in my chair daydreaming about you tying me to it and riding me,” he went on.  

“That could be arranged,” you said coyly, leaning in to give him a lazy kiss.

“Fuck,” he groaned. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

“You love it,” you replied, biting back a smile.

“You’re damn right I do,” he growled as he rolled on top of you.

“How did I get so lucky?” he then mused as he gazed at you in wonder. “I’ve got a smart, kind, talented girlfriend who is also incredibly sexy and kinky as fuck who is one day going to be my wife and the mother of my children.”

“By the way, in my dream Friday night you were a total MILF,” he added as he leaned down and placed a chaste kiss on your lips before pulling back and giving you a wicked smirk.

“Tae!” you scolded with a laugh. “You can’t simultaneously dream about our children and about wanting to fuck me.”

“Sure I can,” he said, giving you a rather serious look. “That fact you were a hot mom that I wanted to fuck is obviously why we ended up with so many kids in the first place. Dream me clearly just couldn’t keep my hands off of dream you.”

“Ok well dream us clearly didn’t know about a little thing called contraception,” you replied jokingly.

“Speaking of which,” you continued, growing more serious and also slightly shy, “I’ve been thinking...maybe it’s time for me to go on birth control?”

“I just...it would make things easier and more convenient,” you went on nervously. “But, if you would prefer we keep using-”

“No,” he said breathlessly, cutting you off. “If you’re comfortable going on birth control then I’m absolutely on board.”

“I want to feel you, Jagi,” he continued, leaning his forehead against yours. “I don't want there to be anything between us when we make love.”

“OK,” you said quietly, overwhelmed by his incredibly supportive and romantic response. “I’ll make an appointment with my doctor.”

“OK,” he repeated with a little smile as he brought his lips to yours in a sweet kiss.

“I love you,” he then added softly as he pulled back and rubbed his nose against yours.

“I love you, too,” you replied, your heart absolutely overflowing with warmth and happiness.

This night may have begun as part of an elaborate plan to put Jisoo in her place and fend off her desperate attacks on you and your relationship, but it was ending on the tenderest of notes: Tae showing you, in yet another special, subtly meaningful way, just how much he loved you.

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Too Good To Be True - Ch. 45 | kth(m)

Summary: Kim Taehyung is a world famous idol in the hit K-pop group, BTS, and you are his personal stylist. Per your contract with Big Hit, he is absolutely, 100% off-limits, and yet, you are completely and hopelessly in love with him. You’ve spent years trying to shove your feelings down, but it’s getting harder and harder to ignore and hide them, especially considering the way Tae always treats you. He’s affectionate and protective and sometimes outright flirtatious, but that’s how he is with everyone, right? Confused, frustrated, and lovesick, you find yourself wondering if it might finally be worth risking your career and your heart to find out.

pairing: Taehyung x reader

genre: Idol! au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, friends to lovers, slow burn

rating: 18+

word count: 4.3k

warnings: cursing, implied sex

Chapter 45: Afternoon Delight

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When you woke up the following morning you were exhausted, sore, and happier than you had been in a very long time. Last night was gratifying in so many different ways. From a purely physical standpoint, it had been, without a doubt, the most pleasurable experience of your life. The energy between you and Tae was unlike anything you’d ever felt before; every touch, every kiss, every thrust sent a wave white-hot pleasure coursing through you. It was truly overwhelming, but in the absolute best sense of the word.

From an emotional standpoint, though, the events of last night were even more satisfying. It felt so good to take charge, to be vocal about your desires and confident in your actions. You wanted something and you went after it without second guessing yourself. In doing that, you had proven to yourself that you were strong and courageous and fierce.

If you wanted to fight Jisoo and protect the relationship you had worked so hard to build, those were precisely the qualities you were going to need to demonstrate.

Moving the covers aside, you realized just then that you weren’t wearing any clothes and neither was Tae. You two must have fallen asleep while cuddling before you had a chance to get dressed and ready for bed. Blushing slightly, you decided that you kind of liked sleeping like this and thought maybe you’d suggest to Tae that you do it more often.

As much as you wanted to stay there with him like that, a quick glance at your watch let you know you had both slept in much later than usual. You unfortunately needed to get up now or else you would definitely be late for work. Carefully slipping out of his grasp, you got up from bed and quickly threw on clothes. After washing your face and removing the remnants of your makeup, you padded into the kitchen in the pursuit of your second true love: coffee.

A little while later you were leaning against the counter, scrolling through Twitter while you waited for the coffee to brew. You were so engrossed in the captivatingly mindless activity that you didn’t even hear Tae enter the room. The beep from the coffee maker pulled your attention from your phone, but before you could move to grab a mug you felt his muscular arms wrap around you from behind. He slid his hands underneath the shirt you had on, settling one on your waist and splaying the other across your lower abdomen. With a gentle tug, he pulled you flush against him. As he began trailing little kisses down your neck, the hand on your lower abdomen slid down until his fingers met soft fabric.

“My shirt, no bra, skimpy pair of panties,” he mused, his breath hot on your neck. “If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were trying to seduce me.”

“Hmm I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you replied coyly, biting back a smile.

This was, of course, a blatant lie. You knew for a fact that few things turned Tae on more than the sight of you wearing his clothes.

“I don’t believe you, little minx,” he whispered in your ear, ignoring your feeble attempt at feigning innocence.

“I think you know exactly what you’re doing right now,” he went on as he gave your earlobe a soft bite. “Just like you knew exactly what you were doing when you sent me those naughty photos yesterday.”

Before you had a chance to respond, his lips returned to your neck. The hot, open mouth kisses he started placing there had you shuddering, but it was the sinful movement of his fingers that had your breath hitching. He’d dipped them just below the band of your panties and was running them back and forth in a teasing, tortuously slow rhythm.    

“I can’t stop thinking about last night,” he purred into your ear, the words dripping from his mouth like honey. “I can’t stop thinking about how stunning you looked in that lingerie or how badly I wanted you when I was tied up or how incredible you felt when I finally got to have you.”

“And right now, all I want to do is bend you over this counter and have you again,” he admitted as he pressed his hips forward, letting you feel every inch of his desire.

Momentarily forgetting that you were supposed to be the one in control right now, you spun around in his embrace and crashed your lips against his in a ravenous kiss which he immediately returned. A few seconds later, he picked you up in one swift motion and set you down on the counter, snaking his arms around you once more and pulling you impossibly close. As you continued devouring one another, he began slowly grinding into you, hungrily and greedily swallowing the soft whimpers he drew from you. Your mind was just starting to cloud over with lust when he broke the kiss for a breath of air and suddenly stopped the intoxicating movement of his hips.

“Fuck,” he breathed out, his eyes going wide when he took in your appearance for the first time that morning. “Sweetheart, I’m so sorry.”

“I didn’t mean to do this,” he went on guiltily, his fingers coming up to gently brush the numerous red and purple bruises that dotted your neck.

It wasn’t unusual for Tae to leave marks. He was, after all, rather possessive when you were intimate which you didn’t mind in the slightest. They typically weren’t this severe, though, and were usually in well-hidden places like your chest or inner thigh. You normally warned him if you felt him unknowingly lingering on your neck, collarbone, or any other easily visible part of your body, but last night you didn’t say a word. Last night, when his lips latched onto that sensitive spot just below your ear, you didn’t tell him to stop or push him away. You just let him keep going, softly sucking and biting until the evidence of his passion bloomed on your skin.

“Do they hurt?” he asked quietly, concern written all over his face as he gazed at you.

“Only a little,” you admitted with a tiny grimace.

He frowned apologetically in response and then brought his lips to your neck and placed barely-there kisses over the marks, soothing the tender skin. Eventually, he moved his lips up and along your jaw until they finally found yours. The kisses you then shared were deep and languid, full of longing. They were the kind you loved to get lost in and never wanted to end.

“Let me take you back to bed, Jagi,” he said softly, leaning his forehead against yours as his thumbs rubbed little circles on your inner thighs where a few more love bites were littered.

“Want to be with you,” he murmured. “Take care of you.”

The fire that had been rushing through him moments ago was gone now, but the passion still clearly remained. You could hear it in his voice, the neediness and desperation, the desire to be so close that he couldn’t tell where he ended and you began. You wanted nothing more than to give in, to let him carry you back to bed and make love to you, slowly and gently like you knew he would, but with every fiber of your being you fought that urge.

“Baby, we’re already running late for work,” you reminded him, running your hands through his hair as you spoke. “We don’t have time.”

“Come shower with me then?” he pleaded, bringing his head up and giving you a hopeful look.

“It will be more efficient,” he then stated matter-of-factly, the slightest smirk spreading across his face.

“That is a lie and you know it,” you said with a laugh. “It takes twice as long as it should whenever we shower together.”

“I like to be thorough when I wash you,” he replied simply, his tone casual.

“It wouldn’t take so long if you weren’t such a dirty girl,” he added a moment later, giving you a seductive lip bite and raised eyebrow, a clear last ditch attempt at luring you in.

You couldn’t stop yourself from blushing, but you rolled your eyes at him and shook your head to let him know his cheesy lines weren’t going to work.

“How about this,” you began as an idea suddenly came to you.

“If you be a good boy and go get ready for work now, we can do the photoshoot tonight,” you said, loving the way his eyes went wide at your proposal.

Last night, while the two of you were lying together in a sweaty heap, Tae had hesitantly asked if you would be willing to let him take photos of you in your lingerie. Tastefully erotic photos, he said they would be, ones that would be for his eyes only whenever you were apart and he wanted to be reminded of how exquisite you were. You were a little surprised by the question, but said yes without hesitation; you trusted him completely to keep such photos private. The idea of him wanting photos of you was flattering and honestly a huge turn on. It also only seemed fair given that you had the shirtless selfie he sent you that one time saved on your phone, a photo which you might have glanced at from time to time when you wanted to be reminded of how exquisite he was.

“Deal,” he all but growled, capturing your lips in a quick, but passionate kiss before letting go of you and sauntering off towards the bedroom. Just as he was about to round the corner of the hallway, he turned around, blew you a kiss, and gave you the biggest, boxiest, heart-melting smile.

~~~

You were not usually a spiteful person.

You did not typically take joy in the suffering of others.

You did not truly believe that two wrongs made a right.

However, you simply could not deny the satisfaction and glee you felt later that morning when you rubbed your fluffy, smutty, very real and still perfectly intact relationship in Jisoo’s smug face.

It was just before noon and you were alone with Tae in the studio doing the second fitting for his Big Hit family photoshoot outfit. The shirt and jacket had been just a little bit too snug when he first tried them on a couple weeks ago, no doubt the consequence of him continuing to frequent the Big Hit gym. Having to do a little extra work by letting them out was a price you were absolutely willing to pay, though. You were completely whipped for Tae’s bulging arm muscles, especially when he used them to carry you to the bedroom and throw you down onto the bed.

Everyone else had already finished their fittings and headed out to lunch, but you had purposefully been dragging it out, wanting to still be working with Tae when Jisoo showed up so they could go to the café together like they did every Monday. Tae admitted once that it drove him crazy when you ran your hands all over him during fittings. He said he’d gotten relatively good at keeping it together and not getting too turned on over the last three years, but that his self-restraint had gone completely out the window once you started dating. It was just impossible, he admitted, not to let his mind wander to filthy places when you were touching him with the same hands that tugged at his hair when he pleasured you with his mouth and clawed at his back when he made love to you.

For this reason, you were normally extremely careful about keeping your touches strictly professional, but today you were making no such effort. Knowing he was already worked up from this morning and wanting to tease him further, you let your hands roam a little more freely and linger a little longer than usual. As subtle as you tried to be, though, he instantly picked up on what you were doing.

“You’re killing me right now, sweetheart,” he whispered as you smoothed your hands over his chest to get out the wrinkles.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you asked sweetly, gazing up at him with big doe eyes.

“You heard me,” he muttered under his breath as he looked down at you with a dark, hungry expression on his face. “You know what you’re doing right now.”

For a few moments you two just stared at each other until eventually you gave him a tiny smirk and looked away.

“You don’t like when I touch you?” you teased quietly as you checked the fit of the waistband of his slacks, brushing your fingers dangerously close to somewhere they definitely shouldn’t be.

“Jagi, fuck,” he groaned.

“I am about two seconds away from dragging you into the dressing room and taking you up against the wall,” he admitted, his voice hushed as he leaned in slightly.

“I’ll put this in that pretty mouth of yours so no one hears you moaning my name,” he growled as he tugged on the scarf you were wearing to hide the hickeys, the same one which you just so happened to use to tie him up with last night.

“I think I’d like that,” you whispered back before giving him a seductive lip bite.

Just then, Jisoo suddenly waltzed into the studio. It was honestly probably for the best that she chose to show up at that precise moment; things had gotten entirely too steamy between you and Tae just now. In your attempt to send him into a lust-driven frenzy, you had failed to acknowledge the effect such an endeavor would have on yourself. The truth was, last night had ruined both of you. With all the teasing you two had done so far today, you were legitimately struggling not to drag him into the dressing room and do a number of scandalous, highly unprofessional things with him.

Glancing over Tae’s shoulder, you found Jisoo wearing a confused and disdainful expression as she took in the sight before her. The two of you were standing awfully close together, gazing at each other lustfully. You were looking very much like two people who had definitely not fought and possibly even broken up over the weekend which is what you can only imagine she hoped to accomplish with her poisonous words on Friday.

“Hi TaeTae,” she said brightly, plastering the fakest smile on her face.

“Hi Jisoo,” Tae replied absentmindedly, not taking his eyes off of you as he licked his lips, clearly still reeling from the intense moment you’d shared just before she arrived.

“Are you ready to go to lunch?” she then asked as she came and stood next to you.

“Hmm?” he replied confusedly as he finally tore his gaze away from you and glanced at her.

“Oh, right. Lunch,” he then said, shaking his head to clear what you knew were some very filthy thoughts.

“Are we done with the fitting, sweetheart?” he asked, the pet name accidentally falling from his perfect lips as he turned back towards you.

You did not miss the way Jisoo’s face scrunched up in distaste upon hearing him call you that. In that moment, it suddenly dawned on you why Tae had likely started also calling you this new, sweet name. He unfortunately had to call Jisoo ‘Jagi’ because that’s the pet name he let slip on national television. You would always be his true ‘Jagi’, but while he was fake dating Jisoo, he wanted you to have a special name that was only for you. Upon realizing this, and noting yet another way he had gone about demonstrating his love, you felt affection bloom uncontrollably in your chest.

“We are,” you replied, raking your eyes down his body in the most unprofessional of ways. “Everything fits perfectly. You look very handsome, as usual.”

“But, please lay off the weights between now and Saturday,” you added flirtatiously. “I won’t have time to alter these again if you keep bulking up.”

He didn’t say anything in response to that, just smirked and wiggled his eyebrows at you suggestively, knowing full-well the absolute last thing you actually wanted was for him to stop lifting.

“Alright, go change,” you said with a laugh.

As he walked away towards the dressing room, you found yourself alone again with Jisoo for the first time since she had deliberately tried to sabotage your relationship. You were still disgusted and frustrated with her, but you were suddenly having some second thoughts about your plan. Maybe it was enough for her just to have seen you and Tae flirting and realized that her attempt to come between you had failed. You wanted to put her in her place, but flat out embarrassing her might be a bit too much. At least, that’s what you thought...until she opened her mouth again.

“I see you’re still pathetically desperate to stay with him,” she sneered. “Even though it’s obvious he doesn't really want you.”

Oh, it’s on bitch.

“I don’t know,” you mused, pretending to actually contemplate what she had said. “He seemed to want me last night.”

As you spoke, you casually removed your scarf, giving Jisoo a full view of your neck, in all it’s colorful, passionate glory. The look on her face when she saw the hickeys was absolutely delicious; her eyes went wide as saucers and her mouth hung open.

“If you think these are bad, you should see the ones on my inner thigh,” you said innocently as you gently ran your fingers over the marks.

She audibly scoffed and rolled her eyes at your remarks, but you could just tell that she was pissed to have been so boldly presented with the proof of your intimate night with Tae.

“I’ve got some bruises on my hips too, but those were from him holding so tightly,” you went on casually, knowing you didn’t need to elaborate in order for her to understand exactly why he was gripping you like that.

“As fantastic as he was in bed, though, the best part of the weekend was definitely him calling me his future wife and mother of his children,” you then said honestly.

While Jisoo stood there, momentarily stunned by everything you had just unleashed upon her, you whipped out your phone and sent Tae a text which you were certain would catch his attention.

[11:53 AM] What would you say if I told you I wanted leftovers from last night’s delicious meal for lunch today?

[Taehyung 11:53 AM] I would tell you to get in your car right now and drive straight home.

[Taehyung 11:53 AM] So I can meet you there and serve them to you over and over again until you are satisfied.

[11:54 AM] I want them.

[11:54 AM] I need them.

[Taehyung 11:54 AM] You’re going to get them, sweetheart.

[Taehyung 11:54 AM] Meet me at home in 20 minutes.

“He was insatiable last night,” you then added, smiling at her as you looked up from your phone. “In fact, I think he’s still hungry for more.”

A moment later, Tae came out of the dressing room and started back towards you two. He looked slightly disheveled, the result of hastily throwing his clothes back on, and his hair was adorably messy. There was a deliciously dark gleam in his eyes and the faintest smirk upon his lips.

“Hey, I’m sorry but I just realized I have to run home real quick,” he said to Jisoo once he had reached the two of you. “I...uhh, forgot something.”

“But, we’re supposed to have lunch together today,” she said back, her tone one of obvious annoyance as she looked at him incredulously.

“We’ll have lunch tomorrow,” he promised as he put on his coat.

“Besides, people already saw us getting tea together at the café this morning,” he added, giving her a friendly smile. “So we’ve put on our show for the day.”

Tae reminding her that their ‘relationship’ was all for show was the absolute icing on the cake. She was seething as she glared back at him, but he was completely oblivious to her displeasure.

Since no one else would have been there to see it, he didn’t even bother to give her a goodbye hug or kiss. He just said bye and gave her a small wave. Before turning to leave, he leaned in real quick and whispered in your ear, ‘See you soon, Jagi’, shot you a wink and a devilish grin, and then quickly left the room.

As soon he was out of sight, you threw on your own coat and began packing up your bag. You thought maybe you should say something else to Jisoo, but ultimately decided against it. She knew exactly what was going on, knew Tae had clearly chosen you over her just now. At this point, there was nothing more that needed to be said. You had won.

“He’s lying to you,” she said darkly just as you were beginning to walk away.

You stilled, letting her words wash over you for just a moment before you shoved them aside and kept walking

“And, you’re lying to yourself,” you replied calmly, not even bothering to look back at her.

~~~

Approximately 20 minutes later, you were tangled with Tae beneath the sheets of your bed, your clothes strewn on the floor in a trail that started in the foyer and ended in the bedroom. He had gotten home before you and had been anxiously waiting there for you. The second you closed the apartment door he was on you, pinning you against it and capturing your lips in a hungry kiss. He roughly pulled your shirt up and off and from there the situation quickly devolved into delightfully filthy chaos.

“Jagi, you’ve ruined me once again,” Tae said afterwards, still breathing heavily as he turned to face you. “I’m going to want leftovers for lunch every day now.”

“They are incredibly delicious,” you said coyly, leaning over and giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“But, people would definitely notice if we just so happened to both take a long lunch every day only to come back basking in a post-sex afterglow,” you then added with a laugh.

“That is true,” he agreed glumly as an adorable pout spread across his face.

“They are also going to notice if we don’t get back soon,” you said after a few moments, gently extracting yourself from his sweaty embrace.

“You're right,” he sighed. "We should get going."

“I’m going to take a quick shower first,” he then said, planting a kiss on your forehead before rising from the bed and heading towards the bathroom.

After watching him walk away, and shamelessly admiring his incredibly cute butt in the process, you grabbed your phone off the bedside table to check your email. A few minutes later you were reading through one Mrs. Choi had just sent out about the upcoming photoshoot when you heard Tae’s phone buzzing from the pocket of his pants that were laying on the floor. It rang several times, stopped, and then immediately started ringing again. After climbing out of bed and fishing it out of the pocket, you glanced down at the screen and saw Jimin’s name.

“Tae, Jimin is calling,” you said as you walked into the bathroom where he was still showering.

“Shit,” you heard him mutter. “I was supposed to meet him at 12:30 to help him with a song he wants to record.”

“Can you text him and let him know I’ll be a little late?” he then asked.

“Yea, sure thing,” you replied before heading back into the bedroom.

Entering in Tae’s password and navigating to his messages, you tapped on Jimin’s name and texted a quick, ‘Running late. Be there around 1. Sorry!’. You were just about to set his phone down on the bed beside you when something suddenly caught your eye. A few rows down from the message thread with Jimin was a thread with a contact name that was simply the letter ‘J’. The cryptic name had caused a little knot to form in your stomach, but it was the most recent message this person had sent that instantly had your blood running cold.

Can’t wait to finish what we started 😉

Hating yourself for being that girlfriend who was so insecure that she stooped to the level of snooping, but feeling in your gut that something just wasn’t right, you clicked on that fateful message.

Yesterday

[J 1:29 PM] Are you still stopping by later today?

[Taehyung 1:31 PM] Yea. I’ll be there around 3:00.

[J 1:35 PM] Sounds good. Text me when you’re here and I’ll let you in the back door.

[Taehyung 3:05 PM] Here.

Today

[Taehyung 8:17 AM] Sorry I had to leave so quickly yesterday.

[Taehyung 8:18 AM] I had to take care of something.

[Taehyung 8:19 AM] When can I come by again?

[J 8:20 AM] Friday evening?

[Taehyung 8:21 AM] Works for me.

[J 8:22 AM] Great. I’ll see you then.

[J 8:23 AM] Can’t wait to finish what we started 😉

This time there was no mistaking it. There was nothing to have accidentally forgotten. There was no other possible explanation. The proof was right in front of you sitting heavily in the palm of your shaking hand.

Yesterday afternoon, Tae lied to you.

He lied about where he was.

He lied about who he was with.

He lied about what he was doing.

Jisoo was right.

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