Kween Of Cuntassia - Tumblr Posts
one of my favorite garak mannerisms is whenever someone says something to him he clearly finds completely wild and his eyes briefly widen like
before he reacts properly. when someone tells you something SO fucking stupid that you momentarily turn into a muppet
He really was the cuntress here
*tears streaming down my face as i desperately grab at the fabric of your shirt* am i at least cringe and annoying in a fuckable way
And if your conscience is bothering you, you should soothe it with the knowledge that you may have just saved the entire Alpha Quadrant - and all it cost was 2 hours of sleep, Ayesha Erotica, and the self-respect of your entire online audience. I don't know about you, but I'd call that a bargain.
things-garak-did-that-made-my-father-call-him-cute.mp4
garak is a pathetic extremely mentally ill cringe gay man in his fourties who day drinks and abuses his prescription meds trying to fuck a twink 15~ years his junior. garak is an ex agent of a fascist state's secret police and has tortured and killed dozens of people. garak is cunty and flamboyant. garak is smarmy and a rude bitch and talks in stupid riddles. garak is terrifying. garak has done unforgivable things. garak is capable of change and kindness and affection. garak wants what's best for his fatherland. garak is a nationalist. garak wants desperately to be loved. garak cannot let anyone truly know him. garak cannot handle emotional intimacy. garak is ready to sacrifice himself for a higher purpose. garak is ready to sacrifice others for what he believes to be a higher purpose. but most importantly garak is a fucking lizard
H-9 for Garak! Imagine it, see it in your mind's eye.
I really wanted to make him more lizard-y but I don't have the skills for it yet so I had to go with what I was able to draw ;_;
I do love me some Plain Simple Garak content~
I continue to underestimate you, Garak. STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE • 2.05 “Cardassians”
starfleet ds9 crew: we only have two morally compromising options before us here... what we need is a third option
the third option:
he's like if the trolley problem could be solved by a mentally unwell gay lizard jumping onto the trolley and blowing up the track before it got to the junction where the switch could theoretically happen
My favorite thing about Body Parts (s4e24) is that Garak was obviously never going to kill Quark. He just decides to spend an afternoon in the holosuites demonstrating his terrifying skills for kicks. Then he solemnly promises Quark that he will definitely kill him very soon –
And you never see him again in that episode. He just goes to the Replimat and orders a spice pudding and eats it while reading poetry or something.
One of my favorite things about Cardassians is the rare times we see them outside, especially in sunny environments, and get to see how the ridges around their eyes actually function well in shading their eyes from bright sunlight, supporting the world building that they enjoy hot environments. Their skin color would also function very well for camouflaging in desert environs. Now, canonically, they also prefer dimmer light, so perhaps they evolved from nocturnal desert dwellers, but still, their ridges suggest they evolved to hunt in places with bright light and little shade.
Like look at this. Built in sunglasses:
love everybody side eyeing garak for speaking to the tv like he’s watching Dora the explorer
