Mothers And Daughters - Tumblr Posts

“Often father and daughter look down on mother (woman) together. They exchange meaningful glances when she misses a point. They agree that she is not bright as they are, cannot reason as they do. This collusion does not save the daughter from the mother’s fate.”

— Bonnie Burstow

something about being a daughter of a mother is always going to be tragic

Hold me. Care for me. Stop yelling at me. I look so much like you. I wish I didn't. Why do you hate me so much. I love you. Stop touching me. I can't stand you. I wish you liked me more. I feel safe with you. I hate you. Thanks for bringing me tea when I work too much. Get away from me. I never want to see you again. I want to tell you about my day. Please don't ask me anything about my life. I love you. I feel like a disappointment to you. I wish you put more effort into our relationship. I can never tell you anything. My brother is your favourite. I resent you. I miss you. Listen to me. I wish I wasn't born. I'm sorry I ruined your life. I don't recognize you anymore. I never want to be like you.

“mothers and daughters existing as wretched mirrors of each other: i am all you could've been and you are all i might be.”

quote by honeytuesday

If it was so important then, why are we silent now?

the emotional whiplash the relationship between me and my mother caused for me throughout my life is batshit insane

Being the eldest daughter looking at your mom like [I love you] [I hate you] [you’re my best friend] [if I have to spend another second with you today I’m gonna lose it] [everything I am is because of you (affectionate)] [everything I am is because of you (derogatory)] [thank you for the sacrifices you made for me] [why the fuck would you make those sacrifices for me] [you deserve the world (you deserved better)]

my grandma passed away a few days ago. three weeks on life support. yet it hit me so hard. she was so close to my heart. yet as i got older i got busier, visited her less. seeing how my mother's been like, how her relationship with her had ups and downs and how terrified she was of her mother not forgiving her. how all of their petty disagreements really meant nothing in the end. eldest daughter, eldest daughter, eldest daughter. mother and daughter. grandma and granddaughter, grandma and granddaughter. seeing my mother tell everyone she's alone now, how her life revolved around her mother and she feels she has no purpose now. her brother lives abroad, i feel for him, he came home for two weeks just to watch his mother die. i wanted to leave this country for so long, for a better life ahead, my heart hurts. my mother lost both her parents, all her friends tell me i have to take care of her now. im nineteen. half the time i can barely take care of myself. my parents are getting old. their hair is all gray. my father lost his father and uncle within four months last year. my mother never cries, it was only those moments i saw her so weakened. i cant speak when my emotions get the best of me. it's like my throat is clogged. is it wrong that i cant help but remember what everyone forgets? when my paternal grandmother degraded my mother for staying with her mother, a memory brushed aside. my grandmother you are, but my grandmother she also was. i graduate college next year. i dont think im prepared to be a person. my mother saw her grandmother die and watched as her mother withered. i look through their old photo albums, all these little kids in these photographs have kids of their own now, my uncle and mom taking care of these babies who now have babies. just like me and my brother with our little cousins. how i love children. how my little cousin loves me. sometimes it stings a bit when at gatherings they mention me getting married all the time when it's not what i'll ever want. and children are never something i'd have. and i'll never be in love with a man. after all that i went through and all that i complained about my family and my parents and my brother and everything, i realise in the end it wont amount to anything but background noise even if it shaped me, and these are the same people who i used to draw heart paintings and write love poems for as a child. it's moments like these when barging through my mind is the thought that soon i'll be my mother.

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The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far from the Tree...or Does It? (Jessica Jones season 2)

Anyone who has watched season 2 of Jessica Jones knows the importance of mothers and daughters holds. Throughout the season Jessica struggles with comparing herself to her mother whereas Trish believes she is nothing like her mother. Ironically the opposite is true for each of them.

The comparison between Trish and her mother never really dawned on me until the scene where Trish wakes up in the morgue and is mad at Jessica for stopping the experiment on her and she ends up saying that Jessica is a disappointment, she has all this power and does nothing with it. This sentence mirrors something Dorothy says once before in the show. Looking back the two seasons have been building to this revelation. The first season does it incredibly subtly, but looking back after the revelations of this season it is obvious. 

At the beginning of this season Trish is on a ratings high talking about the street level heroes within the city.  She talks about Jessica on her show against Jessica’s wishes, though she didn’t say her name she said she grew up with a superhero which makes it obvious who she is talking about. She coerces Jessica in every way she can to take on the case for IGH and discover what happened to her. She does this under the guise that it will give Jessica closure, but in reality she wants jessica to find the truth so she can go public with it and rise in the ratings. This is similar to the methods her mother uses in season 1. Her mother does Trish a favor and immediately tries to “casually” bring up something Trish can do for her. 

Trish throughout both seasons tries to live vicariously through Jessica because Jessica has powers and the ability to fight the “bad guys”. Trish isn’t complacent with what she is doing to help people and wishes she could engage in a more radical, hands on form of justice. Dorothy was living through Trish throughout Trish’s entire childhood. Putting her in the limelight and getting her public recognition through any means necessary even at the expense of Trish’s mental and physical health. Trish may not realize it, but she is doing the same thing to Jessica. Trish pushes Jessica towards danger in both seasons and Jessica suffers incredible trauma in both. 

Also Trish only says she is proud of Jessica when Jessica is doing what Trish believes is right this is briefly shown is season 1 when Trish tells Jessica she is exactly the hero she wanted her to be when Jessica decides to go through with a self-sacrificial way to stop Kilgrave. Throughout season 1 Trish rarely tries to talk Jessica out of anything when Jessica is trying to stop Kilgrave the only time she really tries to nudge jessica into making a different decision is when Jessica tries to run from Kilgrave instead of face him. She also has no qualms with killing the antagonist of each respective season, which goes along with her the ends justify the means mindset. Dorothy has the same mindset in her thinking towards her relationship with Trish. As long as Trish gains and maintains fame and popularity Dorothy believes she is a good person and mother because no matter the means she obtained her desired end goal.

Jessica on the other had has been proven to be a polar opposite to her mother in just about every way. Jessica’s mother is a sociopathic serial killer who blames everyone else for her actions and views the past, before the car accident, in an extremely negative light. Jessica on the other hand blames herself for all the bad things that happen to the people around her even if she couldn’t stop it.  She blames herself that her mother is after Trish, she blames herself for Reuben’s death, she blames herself for the car accident, etc. Jessica also feels extreme guilt for every life she takes and in every situation the choices were limited. Reva-Kilgrave made her kill Reva. Kilgrave-no jail would have been able to hold him and he would not stop until he had Jessica. Dale- granted she was in his apartment, but he was beating her and wouldn’t stop so she lashed out without thinking of her strength. Dale’s death was the only one that was avoidable, but it was entirely out of self defence and accidental. Jessica is literally blinded by nostalgia and views her childhood and herself before the accident through rose tinted glasses. Jessica believes she is a bad person. She views herself in a negative light, but she always ends up doing what is right. She gets lost along the way and is conflicted about her choices, but she comes out the other side making the right choice even in lose lose situations. 

Jessica believes that no matter the ends if the means were horrible or inhumane it doesn’t make you a good person. Her mother believes the exact opposite, if the ends were as desired the means don’t matter. This is shown through their conflicting viewpoints on Karl. Karl was experimenting illegally on humans with inhumane methods on people who couldn’t say no due to their varying circumstances, but his experiment were in gene splicing which could lead to curing genetic diseases and disorders in people after birth and heal people who look to be lost causes. Jessica believes he isn’t a good person and should go away for what he has done. Her mother believes that Karl is a good person even before they enter a relationship and wants him to be free.

This shows the duality within characters related or not that have inadvertent similarities and staggering differences.