This So Cute - Tumblr Posts
Why is nobody talking about this?
Look at their faces, they are so in love
Forget. (a) (f)
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pairing: fem!reader x Kang Taehyun
sypnosis: You woke up to find yourself in a strange environment, barely being able to remember what caused you to end up here. You were alone and worried, and in a hospital. To make the situation even worse, your partner wasnt there beside you. When you finally got notified on how you got here, and who was with you, you found out that Taehyun wasn’t in the same situation as you.
song recs : Je te laisserai des mots - by patrick wilson + I love you so - The walters + for the first time - Mac Demarco
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warnings: Mentions of forgetfullness and memory loss, hospital rooms, doctors etc.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Your eyes slowly took in your surroundings. White blinding your whole vision. The walls, the bedsheets, the table next to you, even the little paper cup filled with water along with two pills placed to your side were white. You looked down to your hands, only to be met with an array of needles stabbed into your arms, either taking your blood or checking something that only doctors could decipher.
You were in a hospital.
As you began gaining your conscioussness, your mind began whirring with a thousand thoughts, instantly feeling dizzy and sick to your stomach. Everything around you started to become way too noticible, the whirring of the machines filling your senses, or the way the sanitary products covered your entire room made you smell everything to an unhealthy extent. You didn’t know why you were here, and you didn’t remember anything that previously happened. Or who you even were with.
“Miss Y/n?” You heard the door slightly budge open, the clacking of heels stumbling you out of your dishevled state. A doctor propped herself at the foot of your bed, a clipboard in her hands and her hair tied into a sleek ponytail. Just like the movies.
“Glad to see you are awake. How are you feeling?” The doctor asked, her eyelashes fluttering with every word she said.
“Um, fine I think? I feel a little dizzy but thats about it. If you dont mind me asking, how’d I get here? Or what happened?” Your voice sounded hoarse and dry, making you wonder how long you were in a sleeping state.
“It is normal to feel dizzy after what you experienced Miss Y/n. The car-crash certainly wasn’t just a small collision. But there is no need to worry. You and your partner made it out safely.” The doctor replied, a look of pity covering all her features.
Car crash?…My partner??
Your heart immediatly dropped to your stomach, Your mouth gaping open at the sudden news given by the doctor. You experienced a car crash. With Taehyun.
“Is he okay?! I need to see him, please let me see him.” You went to get out of bed, trying to gather your strength and move your now numb muscles. But you suddenly felt a strike of pain rush down your spine, making you fall back onto the bed. Shit.
“He is in stable condition, although, he has suffered more impact towards his upper body and head, hence why he is still under extensive care. You will be able to see him once he has woken up and we have made sure that he is fine with you seeing him. In the meantime, there is someone that wants to see you.”
You struggled to take in all the new information, feeling your eyes become hot and teary as you started thinking of Taehyun, worried about his condition and if he was recovering well, or if he would even recover at all.
You nodded mindlessly, not following along with what the doctor said properly. She walked out of the room silently, only for someone else to walk in, well,— rush in.
“Y/n! You had me worried sick oh my god, you’re okay” Kai sat down next to your bed, his blonde hair swaying with his swift movements. His light brown eyes were glistening with tears at the sides, his nose pink from the cold of the outside.
“I was so scared something happened to you and Taehyun…speaking of Taehyun..Where is he?” Kai looked around the room, expecting to see Taehyuns bed somewhere near yours, only to be left looking around the room as fear enveloped his body.
You started crying, Kai’s head snapping to look at your shaking body. Without a second thought he leaned in to give you a tight hug, his hand softly patting your hair as you cried onto his shoulder, his cologne wafting into your senses as his own tears spilled down his face. He didn’t force an answer out if you, waiting patiently as you calmed down.
“He..He’s stable, I think? But he— suffered more damage to his upper body..Including his head. And hes still under extensive care” You weeped, not letting Kai move as you burrowed your head in the crook of his neck to feel his warmness to comfort you.
Kai felt a wave of relief wash over him. Yes, Taehyun was in a different condition compared to you, but from the way you cried, he had genuinely thought that Taehyun was in critical, if not terrible condition.
“Shh..It’s going to be okay, I promise, Y/n. you have to be strong for him. Dont burden yourself with those thoughts, you know how strong he is.” Kai slowly let go of you, his hand brushing over your tear stained cheeks to rub away the dark mascara that gathered around your face and eyes.
Kai always knew what to say at the right time. He was your best-friend, and you had known him since the day you had started elementary school. He was beside you throughout your entire life, including the first day you met Taehyun. Of course Kai had played the role of cupid to get you both together when you told him about the pretty boy you kept seeing at the library, and you couldn’t be more thankful to him for introducing you to the love of your life.
“Thank you Hyuka.” You sniffled up your tears, trying to gather yourself up from the previous breakdown you had experienced.
“Anytime Y/n. Also, I think the doctor forgot to tell you but you cant stay at home by yourself, so you either come to my house until Taehyun is released, or I go to yours, okay? I’m not letting you wait for him yourself.” Kai softly smiled, his little dimples shinning elegantly from the mirror that was located to the side of the hospital.
“Your house. I dont think I can bare to be at my house without Tyun being there” You felt your body weaken again, concern settling itself on your voice.
Hyuka slightly smiled, rubbing your back as he picked himself slowly off of your bed, telling you that hes going to inform the doctor that you you had made up your mind and for them to do the last little check ups on you to make sure you were okay to be discharged.
+ 1 week later +
You didn’t know how to feel about the phone-call you had gotten in the morning informing you that Taehyun was now awake and stable, ready to be spoken to and for doctors to tell you about how he had recovered or changed over this time. You were more than happy to hear that he was doing way better now, but you still had a little piece of concern in your body that you couldn’t quite place a finger on as to why. But you had Kai with you the entire time, and he was going to make sure that you were going to be okay as you visited him.
“Ready to go?” Kai asked, his hands jumbling with his keys as he unlocked the front door.
“Yeah, ready to go but not quite sure if im ready to see him” You sighed, walking out of the door with him as you got into his car.
Kai could tell you were worried, but he didn’t speak up on it once, making small talk about fun subjects as you both made your way to the hospital.
Once you got to the hospital and checked in at the counter, your hands started to fidget with your bag, waiting patiently as you expected the doctor to call you in to see Taehyun. As you and Kai sat down quietly in the small lobby chairs, a nurse made her way out of his room, her pink scrubs making her look kind and petite.
“Miss Y/n?” She called and looked around, you stood right up, approaching her slim figure.
“Hi Miss, You’re here to see Kang Taehyun, Correct?” She smiled, her warming aura making your unhealthily fast heartpace slow down.
You nodded and said a small yes, your hands wrapping around your chest as you impatiently waited for her to move from infront of Taehyuns room so you could see your boyfriend.
“Well Miss Y/n, Hes stable and in good condition, although..During his recovery we had noticed some slight issues that he faced.”
Your heart dropped, eyes instantly moving from the slightly open door of the room to the nurses eyes.
“Issues? Issues like what?” Your voice broke, concern washing over your whole body as you felt your whole world sway beneath your feet.
“He’s been experiencing mild signs of memory loss, and this was noticed from the way he struggled to answer who he wanted to come and see him, as well as forgetting his own name when he first woke up.” The nurses face dropped, her tone becoming both serious and upset.
You barely stood up on your own two feet, Kai rushing to hold you as you slowly stumbled over yourself. Your head begun to spin as you felt everything in your stomach become too heavy for you. You couldn’t take in what the nurse had said, denial washing over all your senses.
“Please can I see him?” You teared up, nudging your body towards the door as you expectadly put your hand on the door handle.
The nurse swayed her head, moving aside as you finally found yourself pushing the door open to be met with the sight you were dreading for an entire week.
“Taehyun?”
The boy slowly faced your direction as he eyed you down from top to bottom, a small smile appearing on his face. You leisurely walked up to him as he watched you attentively, his body not even budging slightly from his comfortable position. He had a book on his bedside table along with his glasses that he only wore when he wanted to read. The glasses you had bought him.
“Hey” Taehyun slowly said as you sat down next to his bed in the small chair, taking in his features as you finally allowed yourself to remember how much you really missed him. You smiled at his voice, calming down as he looked at you kindly, the dimple on the right side of his face slowly revealing itself.
“Hi tyun, how have you been?” You asked, admiring his face to make sure he had no scars or anything that openly revealed he had been injured.
“Relatively good, I feel okay I guess, not the best but not the worst” Taehyun said as he slowly broke eye contact to look at himself on the bed, his expression changing to one that was more full of pity then happiness.
Before you could speak, he added onto his sentence.
“Are you here to give me more medication? Is my normal nurse not here today?” Taehyun asked looking back up at you.
The moment you heard that sentence come out of Taehyuns mouth, your heart instantly dropped. You felt as if the whole world had stopped moving, your body immediatly feeling hot and clammy as your palms began to hold onto your skirt tightly as you tried to stop yourself from crying. He didn’t remember you.
Your own boyfriend didn’t remember you.
Tears slowly started making their way down from your eyes, spilling down your face and ruining your newly done makeup.
“Oh, Um, did I say something wrong? I’m sorry Miss.” Taehyun asked, his face looking down at yours as panic cascaded over his voice.
“No, not at all, It’s just that, you dont remember me.” You lifted your head from inbetween your hands, struggling to look at the person infront of you that no longer recognised you, no longer was the same person that shared the exact same memories with you, no longer the guy that was in love with you.
“Oh..—I’m sorry.” His voice was low and small, a small awkward silence filling up both of your ears.
“No, its okay. It’s not your fault.” You chuckled fakely, trying to cover the tears that were now drowning you and making you struggle to breathe.
“Can I, Um— ask, if you dont mind, who you are? or uh— who you are to me?” Taehyun tried to look at you, only to fail as his eyes made their way back to his hands as he rested them on his lap.
“I’m your girlfriend” You instantly said out, forgetting about how afraid you were of his reaction and what he would say when he found out this information.
“Oh..” He slowly nodded, trying to take in what you had said.
As you both were sitting in silence trying to think of what to say, The doctor walked in, both of your heads snapping to her direction.
“Good morning Mr Taehyun and Miss Y/n, im here to notify that we have checked Mr Kang’s latest tests and it is clear to say that he is ready to be discharged by this evening.” You both nodded, waiting for the doctor to leave the room before you could look back at Taehyun to speak to him.
“Do we have a house together?” Taehyun asked, his head looking towards you as he slowly started getting his belongings from the small table beside his bed.
“Yeah, we do” You smiled, a little bit of joy washing over you even though you didn’t really recognise the person infront of you anymore.
“Oh wow, okay. Um..Y/n? I know that this is going to be different from what you’re used to, but, when we go home, do you think you can tell me about us? or who I was?” Taehyun smiled, his warm eyes covered by his pretty hair that was slightly messy from his hospital bed.
You could only smile back, your whole world feeling as if it was crumbling on you. But you were going to push through this. You weren’t going to let this prevent you from experiencing happiness once again.
“Of course, Tyun.”
++++++++++
You unlocked the door to your apartment at last, the very same apartment you left a week ago only for it to be left in the same messy situation it was in. You took in your surroundings, remembering all the memories you shared in this apartment all for them to go away into oblivion, Taehyun right behind you clueless of everything that you both had done together. You placed all your belongings on the counter and Taehyun followed along, sitting on the small stool you both had bought together because it looked ‘cute’.
“It’s still the morning, Maybe we can go out together today and I can take you to all the places we used to enjoy to see if you can remember them?” You looked at Taehyun that was admiring your face, his eyes taking in every small feature of you.
“I’d like that a lot” He replied back, a little bit of excitement evident on his voice.
You told Taehyun to follow you to your guys’ old room and you showed him his wardrobe that he always used to mess up trying to pick clothes. As you told him about himself and what he was like every morning, he could do nothing but laugh, making you remember how much you truly adored him.
You gave him the oppourtunity to change as you left the room to pack up the kitchen to be ready to go. Finally, he came out of the room wearing a pretty white top with black pants, something he’d wear everyday. Atleast that hadn’t changed.
“Ready?” You smiled, swinging your crossbody over your shoulder.
“Excited even” He followed you out of the apartment, both of you starting to walk together to the little breakfast place that was located only a block away.
As you both arrived to the breakfast place, you told Taehyun about how he would always want to sit inside because he didn’t like eating when people were constantly passing by on the street. He listened attentively as if he was taking notes in his head from his old behaviour. You both went inside and sat at your favourite booth, a little engravement of your and his initials on the bottom of the table. When you told him about how he was the one that suggested to write your initials on the bottom of the table he got surprised, asking ‘why?’ and you could only smile.
“Because you were jealous the morning we came here. I was talking to someone at a convenience store and he started flirting. You basically got really pissed and made me write that” You started giggling as you remembered your boyfriends old temper, how he got so jealous that easily.
Taehyuns eyes widened as he started chucking under his breath, shocked at how he used to behave.
Both of you ordered your breakfast and started eating when it arrived. During the breakfast you told him about the things he used to love, including his severe addiction to going gyming. He nodded and agreed, talking about how he wanted to go to the gym the moment he woke up for some reason. Joy arose at the pit of your stomach, a little bit of hope finally finding itself in your head. If he remembered that, surely he would remember other things.
When both of you finished breakfast, you suggested both of you go to the ice-cream place you would visit if either of you were in a bad mood. He agreed and went along with you, following closely next to you as both of your hands brushed over each other every now and then. Taehyun seemed to get annoyed at the way his hands kept going against yours, so he finally took your hand in his, making you look up to his face.
He didn’t look down, still looking straight ahead as he smiled to himself, a small smirk plastering itself across his face.
You had missed his hands and his touch, missed the way his warm hands would heat your own freezing ones. You felt your cheeks blush as he looked down at you, his hand tightening around yours.
As the ice-cream stall slowly closened and you both arrived, he didn’t let go of your hand, still making you stand close to him.
You snuggled up to his side and ordered your ice-cream.
“Hi, could I please have one scoop of strawberry sorbet? and my boyfriend would like—?”
“One scoop of raspberry sorbet please” Taehyun added on.
Rasperry sorbet.
his all time favourite.
“Sure, is that all for you both today?”
You both nodded, the hand that was enveloped with his tightly holding onto him.
He still was himself.
Both of you got your ice-cream and headed towards the beach that was right next to the stall. you walked in silence as you enjoyed your ice-cream, having little conversations here and there. When Taehyun finished his icecream, he went to go throw the little remainder away, making your hand finally let go of his. As you watched him walk away, you could do nothing but stare at him in the cold sway of the ocean. His beautiful hair briskly moving with each step he took. He was everything you wanted or needed, and you were going to make sure he never left you no matter the circumstance.
Taehyun slowly made his way back to you as he put out his hand for you to take, and you did so. He led you both to a small bench that was located in the middle of the beach and you sat down swiftly next to him.
“Y/n?” He said as you rested your head on his shoulder.
“Yeah Tyun?”
“I dont ever want to lose you.” Taehyun said as he put his arm around you, pulling you closer to him so you were pressed flush against his side.
“I know it’s going to take a long time to go back to how we were, but let this experience be a time where we can start anew, a better relationship.” He lowly said, his voice mildly shaky.
“You’re not going to lose me Taehyun.”
And immediatly, you pulled him into a kiss, placing your hand on his jaw. He placed his hand atop of yours, kissing back passionately yet softly, making sure to not go too rough on you. His touches were delicate, his hand slowly skimming its way around your neck, gently rubbing your back as both of you backed away from each other to admire each others faces.
“Do you think you could take me to a stationary store real quick?” Taehyun blurted out, a little laugh coming out of him as he looked down at you.
You were confused yet didn’t want to question it. Taehyun always made abrupt remarks and decisions, and that was something you adored about him. And you werent going to change that.
You gestured him to get up and nodded, taking his hand back in yours as you led him to a stationary store that was located beneath your apartment.
++++++++
You both got to the store within a few minutes, and as you got there, Taehyun told you to just wait outside and that he would be there for not too long. You listened, waiting as you watched him enter the store quickly.
He walked out with a small book in his hand that had nothing on top or in it, just an empty book full of nothing. He took his hand back in yours and you followed along, both of you going up the stairs to your apartment. You wanted to ask him why he had gotten an empty book, or what he was going to do with it, but you didn’t. You wanted to see what he would do or if he would bring it up. And so you left it to be.
When you both got home, you finally let yourself ease down onto the couch as Taehyun headed into the bedroom, placing his new bought book on the small study table. He sat down on the chair as he opened up his book and pulled out a pen that was in the little pencil case, starting to write quick words.
Your curiousity finally got the best of you, making you stand up and approach him from behind.
You wrapped your hands slowly around his torso and placed your head in the nook of his neck and collarbone, breathing slightly as Taehyun continued to write.
“What’re you writing?” You asked, giving him a small peck on his cheek.
“Im writing everything we did today, and I’m going to continue to write everything we do each day, I dont want to forget anything I experienced with you baby.” Taehyun said as he pulled you closer to him and around the chair, making you stradle his lap.
“I’m going to make sure that everytime I look at you, I’ll always be able to recount the memories we shared with each other, and I’ll make sure that in every life time, I’ll remember you as my perfect girlfriend.”
I NEED SOMEONE TO MAKE A FIC ABOUT THIS OR SOMETHING CUZ OMGGGGG
meme redraw (+ based on)
rule: search your name + fave color + aesthetic on google and share the first 4 non-collage pics.
tagged by: @brighttragedy tysm bby thats very sweet of you! 💜
tagging: @xbelleibarx1999 @b-angtangirl @iamshanubi @valeriabadova 💜
rule: search your name + favourite color + ‘aesthetic’ in google then share the first four (non-collage) pics! ps. i cheated bc black is my favourite colour but it’s also a shade so i didn’t know if it counted and black/pink had the same photo so WHATEVER!
tagged by: the wofe @periminkle but also the love @salvejoon i think?
tagging: tagging some new peeps because i just wanna worm my way into your wonderfully talented, glorious lives 💖 @moonmintrails @hauntedlilies @ohpretty-baby @moonpjms @brighttragedy @hobiance @flowerkth @hobi-gif @periminkle @jjiminah
Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes everyone
Raincoat cat on my mind...
Hoseok getting all shy when bts compliment him ✨ (for anon)
a/n: happy birthday to my beautiful jade @tasteleeknow my heart my soul my shared brain cell i love you dearly i hope you have the absolute best day <3
you wake up to the sun for the first time in a while, no alarm there to jolt you from whatever rest your body catches onto for the night. your senses come to you one by one, the warmth of the sunlight peeking through the blinds, the softness of your duvet, the sound of pans and pattering feet eching softly from outside, creating a disjointed melody you would never get tired of hearing. it’s a song you’re used to in the mornings, but somehow it feels more special, more personal, today.
you take your time stretching yourself awake, brushing your teeth, taming your wild bed-mussed hair into something presentable before exiting your room. you’re immediately attacked with a wall of delicious scent, and you find yourself gaping before you even take a glance at the magnificent (and somewhat unnecessary, given that there’s only two of you) spread of food he’s presented on the table. and him, wearing a pair of joggers and a sweatshirt whose sleeves are too long for his arms and he has to keep pushing them back to have his hands free.
his eyes find yours almost immediately as he turns around, leaving behind the plate he was adjusting for the fifth time, like he can sense your presence in the room even though you’ve made no sound. there’s tiny galaxies swimming in his irises as he takes you in, the fondness clear as day through his wide smile.
“happy birthday, mine,” he croons, bouncing over to wrap strong arms around your entire body, trapping your arms against you as he practically lifts you up in his death squeeze. you blame that on the way your breath is taken away, but you know deep down that getting to see him in the morning does it to you every day, whether it’s waking up to him sleeping next to you or seeing him drowsy and squinty eyed as he makes coffee for both of you.
and the name he calls you, mine. a blatant display of his possessiveness for you, proof that he feels just as strongly for you as you do him, four letters that never fail to make your heart sing.
“you didn’t have to do all this for me,” you mumble when he lets you go, flattered and a bit embarrassed but so, so happy. there’s tall stacks of pancakes dotted with berries, fluffy eggs and crispy bacon, seared tomatoes and cut up fruit and steaming mugs with beautiful latte art decorated with care. it’s too much, just enough, all at once and your heart squeezes again in your chest.
“you didn’t have to do all this for me,” you mumble when he lets you go, flattered and a bit embarrassed but so, so happy. there’s tall stacks of pancakes dotted with berries, fluffy eggs and crispy bacon, seared tomatoes and cut up fruit and steaming mugs with beautiful latte art decorated with care. it’s too much, just enough, all at once and your heart squeezes again in your chest.
“of course i did,” he says, voice strong and adamant with a twist of shyness. “it’s for you. even this is not enough.”
and that’s it, isn’t it? his gentle love language, the way he pours his love into the things he does for you, in the ways he can’t explain with his words because he doesn’t know how. the way he presents you with things and massages and hugs, almost expecting rejection and lighting up when you do anything but that. hiding his pleased expression with sarcastic quips that you can see right through. you want to tell him that he could have presented you with a soggy piece of bread and you would still feel this way, special and important and loved.
you raise your hands to cup his cheeks instead, your language for him, and caress his cheekbones with your thumbs. his big eyes shine at you as if he’s looking at the sun, straight on and unblinking like he knows he might go blind but he doesn’t care one bit. he turns his head in your hands to press a kiss to one palm reverently, then the other, the only gift you want or need from him given so early in the day (although, you’ve seen the wrapped box he poorly hid in your shared closet days ago and chose to ignore it for his sake).
he leads you to the table, helping you sit before taking the seat next to you and serving you a heaping plate. you reach for your fork, but he stops you, taking his own and holding a bite out for you instead. you raise a brow at him as if to say really? but he just holds your gaze and tips the fork closer to your mouth. you let him feed you with a roll of the eyes and hold back a moan of appreciation when the pancake almost melts in your mouth, the tang of a blueberry complimenting the syrup he generously drizzled on top.
he’s smiling at you knowingly and you know you’re blushing, but you ignore him in favor of opening your mouth up for another bite, letting him take care of you.
it is your birthday, after all.
—
soft hours
in light of recent events, for you my loves @tasteleeknow @rachalixie @gimmeurtmi ♡
wc: <0.5k
warnings: none. maybe suggestive if you really squint. not proofread tho and it's like 4am
catching a glimpse of your lover sat on the living room floor, you can't help but stop on your tracks to watch him. watch him play with the cats, cuddling them and giving them head scratches. you loved seeing him in his own world with them, he looked so peaceful.
minho soon picks up the gloves he had prepared by his side, slipping them on before beginning to prepare food for the cats. he's always put a lot of love and care in raising them, his love language seeming to also apply on his pets.
you find yourself marching closer, socks rubbing against the wood floor before dropping on your knees behind him. your arms instinctively wrap around his figure, in search of warmth. warmth that you always find in him whenever you seek it. he smells like home, more than home itself does. now all curled up against him, you hug minho close and peer over his shoulder at the bowl between his legs.
"was wondering when were you gonna stop being a spectator and join." he mutters, and it takes you by surprise. his cat instincts were really something else, or maybe he just had a radar for you.
"didn't wanna spoil your time with your kids." you answer with a smile, lips ghosting over his skin.
'they're your kids as well.' minho wants to say.
you kiss his neck, forming a little constellations of pecks as you move from his clavicle up to his jaw, doubling up on the spot where a tiny mole rests. he's ticklish and it makes him let out the cutest tiny giggles. but minho doesn't stop you, he never does.
"did you know?" you mumble against his neck, eyes fixated on his hands carefully preparing the food. "they say wherever you have moles is where a lover in your past life kissed you the most."
he chuckles, amused by the new discovery, "is that so?"
"mhm." you hum, not resisting the urge to plant another peck on his skin. it's warm, and soft, you want to kiss him all day.
he speaks after a few seconds, like he always does when he's preparing a witty comment. "then you're doing a good job at keeping it the same for my next life as well."
"i'm adding even more." you huff out a small but proud giggle, "you'll be all freckled up."
"i'll be yongbok in my next life?" he mumbles, almost to himself by how fascinated he is by the idea. "doesn't sound bad at all."
you stay like this for a little while. watching minho's busy hands makes you fail to notice the lopsided smile that has made its way to his lips, after thinking of fact you just told him. "i'll have a lot on my thighs then." he muses, the realization making your cheeks heat up.
@piplicious your sketching made me make sketches w/ music tysm
what do you even know ? ㅡ kim taerae.
kim taerae x reader
maybe coming to that party wasn't such a bad idea...
warnings : alcohol, drunk reader. i'm kind of an harsh narrator sorry i suck at this ✋🏼 that's my first post ever :(
genre : fluff
you know, i kinda hate it when people put themselves into embarassing situations and then cry about being embarassed.
and when i say "people", i'm talking about you.
you were really not into parties. through all your years in high school, you never even been to one, very much repelled by the images and the words given to you after each one. what was so good about being with so many people in a small house ? dancing? drunk to the point they might not have a clue what they are doing ? you would rather be in the comfort of your home.
but, when you finally finished high school, you had one wish. you were willing to enter a new chapter of your life. you were open to new things, trying to change yourself for a better version, more confident and happy than the former one. your best friend, kim taerae, always supported you into that, still advicing you to take things slowly. and you agreed with that...
...however, when that girl from your class invited taerae to her house party right in front of you, you kinda lost it. i mean, i'm not supposed judge you and all, but damn, you were out of your mind for real. you decided to announce you'll come with your best friend to that party when your classmate told him he could bring a plus one. you saw the face of the boy shift into a surprised expression when you said that, asking if you were sure. and you were sure.
well, at least that's what you said. you had no intentions of going to that party at all, just thinking about it made wanna hide. but, if we were being honest, taerae was not just a simple friend. he was so much more than that.
you don't really know when you started having feelings for him. was it when you two started going to college together, when you saw him the first day of school with that one special smile on his face ? was it when you were in high school, the day were he gave you his umbrella because it was raining so much and there was no way he was letting you go home under the rain ? maybe you fell when you guys where 12 and he called you pretty when the boys in your class said otherwise ? it could even be the day you met, when you were 8, and he let you play with his bicycle.
it's not important anyways, now you were sure you were utterly in love with taerae. he made you feel the way nobody ever made you feel by just being a friend. and you wouldn't change it for anything in the world, because you loved what y'all got. you were never, never, ever, planning on confessing.
still, my friend, that's exactly what you did that damned night. you went to that party, and the atmosphere was just too much for you too handle. but how the hell were you going to chicken out and leave ? and let taerae with that one girl that seem to laugh so hard when he's around ? no way. that's why you started drinking. that was a really dumb idea actually but so much people were doing it and you realized it was probably to ignore that crippling anxiety.
but you drank too much. like, for real. wtf was wrong with you.
taerae kept his eyes on you that whole night, kind of worried about your drinking demeanor. when he saw you taking down one more glass, he decided it was time for him to stop you. gently, he took your free hand into his left one, using the right one to take away the glass from you.
"y/n, maybe you should slow down with the alcohol, don't you ?", he said, trying to give you a reassuring smile.
"taerae, i have no idea what i'm doing here..."
"i know, don't worry", he answered, holding your hand a bit more tigh. "you want us to take some time away from the crowd ? there is no one in the kitchen, we could hang out here. and if you really don't feel good, let's go home."
you didn't want to ruin that night for him. he didn't come to this party only to go because you were being a pain in the ass. well, that's how you felt, but i swear you're not, parties sucks anyway. and little did you know, taerae felt exactly the same tonight. he went only because you seemed so determined to go.
"i'm up, for the kitchen." you said.
without letting go of your hand, he smiled, taking you to the kitchen, far from all those people. there, it was just the two of you, with the loud music that was still shaking the whole house. it was so chaotic, yet so calm, that you started to feel more peaceful. when your eyes ended up on taerae's angelic face, you started to feel it. you know, that one strange feeling that made you fell all warm and fuzzy inside, forming a pleasant knot in your stomach. you just couldn't take your eyes of off him, and you were about to lose it when a coy smile appeared on his lips.
"is every thing okay, y/n?", he asked.
"what ?", you answered, not hearing him well because of the music.
he let go of your hand, letting both of them take place on your shoulders, to take you closer to him. the distance between the two of you was small, but not to the point it was too much. it was enough to make you frustrated, but your eyes had no choices but to trail on his mouth, when he asked you once again if you were okay.
"i love you'' you said, like your voice would get lost into the void and he won't hear you.
"i love you too", he whispered. but it was not enough, you knew he didn't mean it the way you meant it.
"in what way ?", said the alcohol in your system, making you ask things you would have never ask initially. he hesitated a bit before asking you,
"is it cool if i put my hands on your waist ?"
you nodded, and he let his hands go down your sides to end up on your hips, taking you even more closer to him. letting his head go forward to you, his forehead met yours, resting there. you didn't know where to look at, going back and forth between his eyes and his lips. even with your drunk state, you couldn't help but to feel a little shy.
"i'll love you the way you want me to love you", he finally declared.
"huh uh ?" was all you could answer, wanting to make sure it was true.
"huh uh", he confirmed.
"but i feel like i love you more than you love me", you added, looking into his eyes. he sighed.
"what do you even know..."
before your heart could burst, he pulled away from you, only going to pat your head gently.
"i'll take you home, let's talk about it again when you sober up."
Farmer rat 🥳🥳
What beautiful creature. Has the mother's eyes.
