Tw// Trauma Mention - Tumblr Posts
I don't know much because I've just sort of learned about it, but ...
I quite like some of the concepts of Schema therapy. Mainly because it acknowledges different coping styles and how it affects someone throughout their life.
I feel like, generally, certain reactions to trauma are deemed more appropriate than others. Those who react in the typical "victim" way (withdrawn, scared, apologetic) are more accepted than those who react aggressively or stubborn.
Sometimes people who've been hurt end up hurting others, become aggressive, resolve to addictions, have little / no empathy, etc. and everyone else's reactions to them is "They're not the victim. They're the abuser. They hurt me!" And I get it, you've been hurt as well and you don't owe anyone forgiveness, but why should the only outcome of facing trauma be: the person becomes understanding / sympathetic / stronger / nicer. Not everyone reacts the same to trauma.
People also don't always end up with "I'm not good at anything" mindset. Some parents expect success from their kids, and that results in them over working to get good. They might end up developing a sense of pride and come off as conceited (they may even for a while genuinely believe they're better than others or 'you just have to apply yourself') or be seen as "naturally smart" (when they're not - they were overworked and literally had no other option).
I'm just tired of people looking at others and assuming "They've never been through anything like I have" / "They must look down on people with trauma and disabilities" / "They're smart - they can't possibly understand what's it's like to struggle" / "They're aggressive and thus want to hurt me because they're abusive"
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Anyway, there's 3 coping methods (response to a maladaptive schema): Avoidance, Surrender, Overcompensation.
I think most people expect a surrender or avoidance reaction, and never consider overcompensation.
Why did you hate me so much. I was just a little girl... I was just trying my best. I had only my drones...Father left me alone with you, and you hurt me so badly. I... wanted to be loved, I wanted to feel safe, I wanted to be treated better.
I hope I never am like you... ever... I hope you burn in hell, I hope the Solver has it's hooks in you and is tearing you limb for limb, "Mother"
