Writing Romance - Tumblr Posts

How do you know when to “fade to black” for sex scenes and such? For me it either feels too early, or like “I’ve gone this far, may as well go all the way”

When to "Fade to Black" in a Sex Scene

The portrayal of romance and sex in fiction can be broken into different "heat levels," and "fade to black" is a name for a heat level that is defined by how much the reader gets to know about what's going on "in the bedroom."

Closed Door - Nothing beyond kissing is shown. Anything else happens off-the-page, or "behind a closed door." Closed door romances tend to focus more on the emotional development of the romance rather than the physical development.

Fade to Black - Kissing and light "making out" is shown (hands roaming on non-intimate body parts), but the scene "fades to black" before hands start touching intimate body parts and things get steamy/explicit.

Open Door - In an "open door" sex scene, the reader gets to see everything. Just how graphic and explicit things get depend on the specific heat level. -- Low Spice: one or two sex scenes, minimal detail, general terms, emphasis on emotional connection rather than physical activities.

-- Medium Spice: a few sex scenes, moderate detail, euphemistic terms, not overly explicit. Focus is more on emotional connection but with some emphasis on physical sensation.

-- High Spice: frequent and explicitly detailed sex scenes, graphic depictions with clear and direct language. Focus is more on physical sensation with some emphasis on emotional connection.

So...

If you want to write a true "fade to black" sex scene, they can do some kissing and light making out, but before hands start roaming to sensitive places, you need to turn off the lights. :)

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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When writing couples, I like to use the Kiss Rule:

If they have to kiss for you to know they’re in love, you’re not writing a romance right.

lovely little domestic prompts

feel free to use! :)

running their love interest a bath after a long work day

covering the sharp part of the table when they pass so they don’t hit their hip

“your mom is coming over today.” “tell her to bring fried rice or she’s not invited.” “you tell her, she’s your mom.” “but she likes you more!”

deciding together how they want their house to look

painting their child’s room together

“i meant it when i said i wanted to start a family with you.”

baby-proofing everything not because they have a child or are planning for one but because one character is clumsy as hell and the other is a worried mess alllll the time because of it

“wake up and come get breakfast, love.” “…. now…….. when i said yes to this whole marriage thing i thought we were on the same page and you understood when i said i don’t wake up before 6pm.” “i made hashbrowns.” “i’ll be right there.”

one character covering the other with a blanket when they fall asleep watching a movie on the couch

making tea or coffee for their love interest before bed (and just the fact that they know exactly how they like their tea and coffee swooon)

cooking anything together honestly, not even needing to ask where the items are because they’re so in tune and used to each other

“where’s the new coffee mix?” “i’ll tell you if you tell me where you put the keys?” “i TOLD you i don’t know where—”

long movie nights where one is in charge of the blanket and pillow fort and one is in charge of the snacks

them going on a short trip and one character nagging the other about bringing their allergy meds

nagging in general, frankly

“it’s your turn to do the dishes.” “let’s get a divorce.” “we aren’t married yet, my love.” “well we sure as hell aren’t getting married now.”

“i am one hundred percent content to stay with you on this couch until the end of time.” “that sounds pretty damn lovely to me.”

writing romance...

Me: *gives person A a super tragic backstory*

Me: *gives person A a love interest, person B, who has no experiences to help them understand A*

Me: They're perfect! Their love will be one for the ages!

Me:

Me:

Me: *blinks*

Me: Okay, so maybe not.

The most important question I ask myself while writing romance, five years apart and much classier now, thanks to Kate Clayborn's incredible needlepoint skills.

I'm a conflict writer (this will surprise no one, as I feel like you'd be hard pressed to find a romance writer who loves an explosion more than me), so this question is my lodestar when I work. I ask myself after every scene: Why Can't They Be Together Right Now. This isn't a vague question for me while I'm writing -- I literally write the answer down in a notebook.

"Chapter 1, Scene 1: They haven't met yet."

"Chapter 7, Scene 2: He's just been stabbed. Right now is not a good time."

"Chapter 18, Scene 1: He thinks she deserves someone far better than he is (dummy)."

The goal is for the reasons to evolve and change, and reflect both what I think of as the plot (what's going on externally in the book) and the story (what's happening internally in the book).

If the answer is the same for too long (say, two or three chapters?), I know the book is lagging, and I have to amp it all up.

Also!! Friendly, wholesome reminder to not romanticise toxic things in a relationship in writing!! If you’re unsure you can always google for how to tell if you’re in a toxic relationship and change your writing as needed!

Small romance things that make me go FERAL

A very totally incredibly non-delulu list by Writerthreads

arm/shoulder/waist/SMALL OF THE BACK touches

HANDS BRUSHING, BUT TOO NERVOUS TO DO ANYTHING MORE

calling them by their name ("What's your opinion on this, X?") (they way they say their name makes their heart do funny things)

the way their voice goes heavy/breathy

CHIN RESTS ON THEIR SHOULDER

whispering into their ear and the way their breath tickles

non-affectionate nicknames just for them

recognising their laugh and trying to make them laugh just to hear it again

little private smirks/winks, watching their reaction when someone makes a joke

sniffing their hair/recognising their on their shampoo

eye contact so deep they feel like sinking

SMALL PECKS ON THE CORNER OF THEIR MOUTH/CHIN/FOREHEAD

recognising the sound of their footsteps

co-existing in the same space, acknowledging their presence and feeling safe

CARESSING THEIR CHEEK WITH THEIR THUMB

recognising their nervous ticks and comforting them, like putting a hand on their bouncing leg

tracing scars, freckles, moles, lines of their muscle, you name it (SCREAMS)

grinning when they blush

watching with pride as the other does a presentation/leads a mission/takes charge

making up private signals for each other

HAND KISSES

NECK KISSES

playing with their hair/brushing their hair/braiding their hair

Ah, love. That lingering warm, fuzzy feeling in your chest. I love love.

"light is what we create"- when the romantic tension is high

a prompt list by @novelbear ᵔᴥᵔ

unconsciously leaning in towards each other

^ or gradually gravitating towards one another in a room in general

laughing at every joke they make, even if they're not that funny

eyes checking out their entire outfit when you first see them

^ then having to ask their giggling friends what their problem is after they've been caught

the triangle method ??? duh

inside jokes seem to accumulate and pile up as they start to spend more time alone together

eye contact being so strong, even in smaller conversations

voices changing around each other (whether it deepens or their tone in which they speak changes)

smiling and giggling throughout the entire conversation

"you always look good, what do you mean?"

always finding a way to have physical contact

^ having hands brush against eachother, being so close that they're shoulder-to-shoulder, touching their forearm briefly, etc.

compliments on top of compliments

noticing or remembering the little things

"am i too close?" "no! no, you're fine."

brushing hair out of their face or behind their ear :(

the look of absolute admiration and love one gives when the other isn't looking

^ cue their other friends gagging and telling them to "stand up"

when they lean in to get something off of their face and the other literally stops breathing for a second

goofy smiles

always being able to joke around together