I Do Not Want To

I do not want to

Push this restless body

Off of my bed

Like a corpse off a boat

To drag myself to

My computer screen

To search and search

Find nothing worthwhile

What of friends

What of work

Again, I

Find nothing worthwhile

I want to rot

In the softest of covers

To drown in comfort

To die in a sea of stuffing

Fake mushrooms

They are super poisonous, like I mean, hella poisonous

Deathcap, named after the interesting patterns that appear on the cap of the mushroom that sometimes resemble skulls. That, and the fact that its a main ingredient in a common poison found on assassins everywhere. Yeesh

I feel so guilty

To do nothing

In a time of turmoil

In a time of fear

Afraid to bring something home

That will kill my mother

Yet how we wander

To store to store

I am afraid

Not of responsibility

I am afraid of action

To work, to work, to die in work

I need money to live

I am afraid to live

To leave my comfort

My home

To work in a pandemic

No one is taking seriously

What drives a fake cowboy

In a town of plastic cars

Spite, hard-headedness,

Nothing I have

Despite the plaid

Despite my birthright

So go on cowboy

Hiding at home

Afraid of the world

That doesn't need you

I am going to sit in bed

Dreaming of sandwiches and quesodillas

Noodle cups and all the things

I dont have to make myself

I cant do it right now

I cant

I cant

I cant

I dont want to

Let me wallow

Work is hard

Complain complain

All I do these days is

Complain

Heroes

I can barely keep track Of 100 lines

1 1 5 In the end, It’s just personal

A universe of 100 books An intervention, A problem

A problem

Several hundred Limit, taken to the extreme

Equal to a city’s population

A nation of 100 questions, Ignored

Doing fake flower studies for a game

St. John's Wart