There Was Something In Fade's Focus That Was So Beautiful. The Slight Crease Of Her Eyebrows, The Concentration

There was something in Fade's focus that was so beautiful. The slight crease of her eyebrows, the concentration in her wonderful odd eyes, the precision in her hands... This will definitely not be the last time you asked her to draw with henna on your hands. The artwork she was making on your hand was simply too beautiful to be made only once.

"I know you're staring, tatlım." she said softly without even lifting her eyes.

You smiled softly, your eyes filled with adoration.

"I'm not staring. I'm admiring, that's different." you corrected her with a light chuckle.

She looked up from her art to fix her gaze on yours, an amused glint in her eyes.

"You're corny, you know that ?"

"I don't care." you shrugged nonchalantly. "You're worth being corny for."

Under the intensity of your gaze, Fade almost blushed. But she only returned your smile, shaking her head lightly with mirth. She lifted your wrist to press a kiss on it, her eyes not leaving yours.

Yoru found you annoying.

Why did you have to get so drunk ? You're even louder than usual now. He had to endure your irritating voice singing as he carried you on his back towards the dorm. He had to endure the sweet giggle escaping your lips every time he turned a corner. He had to endure the frustrating sensation of butterflies in his tummy when you nuzzled your face in the back of his neck.

Of course, he did not forget that your inebriated state was Jett's doing. But he could not help but think how stupid you were to drink that much even though you knew you were a lightweight.

When he finally put you in the warmth of your bed, he rolled his eyes at the sight before him.

You were drooling.

With an exasperated sigh and a scowl on his face, he wiped your chin clean and prepared to leave the room.

"Yoru."

He froze. You were only mumbling in your sleep, yet he could not stop the sigh of frustration from leaving his lips. He looked back at you, his cheeks slightly blushing, then tucked you in better.

He found himself ridiculous. Ridiculous for feeling that way towards you. Ridiculous for thinking you were cute. Ridiculous for caring that much.

He will definitely not forget to scold you in the morning while helping recover from your hangover.

The name is Shana (nicknamed Nana).

I'm a french black girl (as surprising as it may seem for some people).

I'm an INFP-T neurodivergent person. (May the universe have mercy !)

I like taking random pictures (a lot), drawing (when my brain is in the mood), reading (way too much) and sometimes writing (meh).

Welcome to this random page !

(as random as my own silly and unstable existence)

Here, have a cute bug !

(Isn't he adorable ?)

Oh ! And the masterlist is right here !

Waiting for my train.

Quality Time (Gekko x Reader)

Please, someone save me from that Gekko brainrot !

I'm back with another shot. I love writing (and thinking) about him way too much.

Thousands apologies in advance to your eyes for my murderous grammar.

Eating the floor.

As figurative as this expression might be, Gekko now perfectly understood it in several different ways. Each way of how he tasted the floor had a different flavor : painful humbling, jaw fixation, flattened face, the training tatami that he accidentally licked during his degustation, his own saliva that he accidentally choked on, and maybe a bit of his own teeth. He even had a little taste of the wall.

“Stand up.”

Gekko uttered a small grunt, his face still kissing the floor as he momentarily wondered if you secretly were a sadist. He stood up and looked at you as you put your hands on your hips. You looked at him with your eyes slightly squinted and Gekko suspected that you wondered how you'd make him taste the floor again. His eyes met Wingman’s who was shaking his head and hiding his face.

“Ready ?” 

He huffed. At least you warned him. He took position and waited.

How did he end up in this situation ? Well, Reyna once pointed out how hand-in-hand combat was his weakness during missions. She was unsurprisingly not wrong. Since he joined Valorant, he prioritized his aim and his stamina over anything else. And he had never been much of a fighter. The number of times he had been physically restrained by an Omega agent was quite big. So, to overcompensate his weak point, he asked you to train him. You were the best in the protocol in hand-in-hand combat. 

And he wanted an excuse to be physically close to you anyway.

“Your shoulders...” You noticed. “You swim ?”

Gekko blinked before managing to dodge an attack from you. He couldn't help but feel a pang of pride when you nodded appreciatively. He heard Wingman applauding from the corner of the room.

“Actually yeah.” He answered as you paced around him like a predator. “It helped with my asthma growing up. Harbor has even been coaching me when I joined the protocol.”

You nodded and suddenly jumped on him. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a surprised yelp as he felt his back bouncing harshly on the tatami mat. When he opened his eyes, you were staring at him intensely, your eyes squinting slightly in concentration. He then noticed that you were pinning him down. A new way of eating the ground.

“Your reflexes are weak.” You said plainly. “How did you survive until now ?” 

Gekko did not find anything to answer that. The way you easily kept putting him down since the beginning of the hour said enough. Harbor also trained him with basic martial arts knowledge to be at least capable of defending himself. But against you, they seemed pretty useless. You read his movements as if they were boringly predictable — they probably were — and slow. Plus, the fact that your face was only a few inches away from his did not really help him to focus. His brain literally stopped.

“Hm. I’d be honored to give you some muscle stiffness.”

Was he intimidated ? Yes. Did he like it ? Very. Does that make him a masochist ? He wondered.

Your training was painfully effective. In only three hours, you solidified the basic knowledge in martial arts Harbor gave him and was able to dodge some of your attacks. It took him time, but after you explained to him how to read people's body movements in a way he could understand, he managed to predict some of your punches. Not all, but it was a beginning. But even though he could sometimes predict your movements, you were way too fast for his body to react in time. He swore that your kicks were deadly weapons.

Wingman brought Gekko a bottle of water while cheering as he was laid on his back on the tatami mat.

“You alive ?” You nudged his shoulder with your foot as you looked down at him.

“I’m still breathing.” He huffed as he sat up. “I think.”

He patted Wingman's head and took the bottle while looking up at you. You did not even seem tired.

“You have more stamina than I thought you’d have.” 

“Thanks…?” He said while raising an eyebrow.

You tilted your head slightly then shrugged, your eyes still fixed on him. “You're very welcome.” You took a look at your watch then hummed. “I recommend you to take a warm shower, eat dinner, then to go to bed. You will suffer when you wake up.”

He was always stunned by the tone you used every time you spoke : a tone placed between an absolute neutrality, a subtle amusement and a vague boredom. And most of the time, he couldn't manage to guess what you were thinking about. He stood up and tried to stretch his arms but immediately winced when the pain started hitting.

“Yep.” You nodded without even looking at him. “A warm shower. Very warm.”

You walked out of the training room with a light step while he was dragging his feet behind you.

“Have a nice night.” You said to him as you walked away.

“Huh ? Ah thanks !”

Gekko always felt uncharacteristically shy around you. Which was quite surprising since you barely talked with him. He just admired you from afar since he joined the protocol, sometimes rambling about how he found you cool to Neon. You always intimidated him. He was so outgoing with people but with you, he became so shy. The other agents noticed it of course. How could they not ? The bubbly Gekko being suddenly so quiet in front of someone ? Of course they would notice. The teasing he received from his friends was colossal.

After a warm shower (a very warm) and a good dinner like you recommended, he let himself flop down on his bed with a tired huff. Today was the longest interaction you two had since he joined Valorant. A very painful interaction but still an interaction. A very physical and brutal interaction but still a lovely one. He reached out to you for help, advices and tools to defend himself, and you handed it to him without questioning. You did not judge him like he feared you would. After all, agents of Valorant were supposed to be the best defense of this world. He was one of these agents. He had a good aim, he had good stamina despite his asthma but he lacked hand-in-hand combat experience and knowledge which could be quite vital in some situations on the field. He didn't think low of himself. Gekko was just someone who wasn't afraid nor ashamed to acknowledge his weaknesses.

Outside of your sessions, everything sadly stayed the same between you two to Gekko’s despair. He couldn't help but feel disappointed. He thought that you grew  close, but outside of the training room, you stayed distant. When he waved at you from afar, you turned your face away. When he raised his hand for a high five, you stared at him in confusion. When he handed you a weapon for a mission, you just nodded curtly. When he joined your table for lunch, you barely acknowledged his presence. Neon and Jett tried to reassure him by saying that you were like this with everyone. He knew that, but he had hoped to be an exception.

After a few weeks, he still happened to taste the floor as much as when you started to train him. Not because he was a bad learner, but because everytime he adapted to a fighting style, you switched into another. Everytime he walked out of a session with you, he felt he improved himself until the next session. It was impressive how many ways you had to beat his ass. Or to strangle him.

“I yield !” He choked out as your legs stifled him. He patted the floor to indicate he was giving up. “Air ! Air !”

You released him from your legs and let him breathe and sat up with your legs crossed, staring at him.

“You dead ?”

He coughed a little and shook his head. “Nope ! Pretty much alive !”

Wingman rushed towards him with a bottle of water as he kept coughing. He took a few sip of water then looked up at you to notice you staring at him without flinching. He cleared his throat to hide his blush under your gaze (even though he knew it was useless) and turned fully towards you.

“Why did you accept to help me ?” He asked.

“Hm ?” You tilted your head slightly.

“I mean…” Gekko nervously rubbed his neck and shot a glance at Wingman who quietly nodded to encourage him. “...we never really interacted with each other outside of missions before.”

You tilted your head to the other side. “And…?”

Your attitude reminded him a little bit of a cat : aloof but attentive.

“And despite that, you accepted right away.”

You stayed silent for a moment, squint your eyes slightly then shook your head negatively. 

“I’m sorry. I don’t manage to see why this comes as a surprise.” 

He looked at you with raised eyebrows. Of course he was the only one surprised here. 

“We barely talked to each other yet you accepted right away. Why ?”

“Why not ?” You ask back. “You're my colleague, you asked for help and I could provide you with that help. So I did it. Why is it that surprising ?”

Gekko blinked for a second and let out a soft chuckle. Wingman looked between you two with a curious tilt of his little head. Your response was so simple that he never envisaged it. So simple that it was almost unpredictable. 

“Well thanks.” He laughed gently.

“You’re very welcome.” You shrugged. 

You kept staring at him with that deep (and sometimes unnerving) gaze of yours. After some time, he realized that your eyes weren't dreamy. They were intensely focused and he could see the intricate mechanisms constituting your thoughts without being able to decipher it.

“Do I have something on my face ?” He asked with a nervous chuckle.

“Freckles.” You responded simply. “And a smile completed by dimples most of the time. Why ?”

Wingman let out a few high-pitched garbled sounds that sounded like laughter. Gekko’s finger played with the bottle.

“Nothing. I just noticed that you sometimes stare at me a lot.” 

“Oh.” You nodded slowly. “Sorry. I tend to stare a lot at things that fascinate me.”

If he was already slightly blushing (maybe because of the previous efforts), he was now burning red. His eyes were wide open. Wingman put his little hands over the space where his mouth would be, looking even more flabbergasted than his friend.

“Wait…what ?”

“You seem surprised again.” 

He swallowed hard and took a deep breath, cleared his throat (nervously choked on his own saliva) then looked fully at you.

“Do you realize what you just said ?”

“Words ?”

Of course. He started to understand how you worked. When most people thought A, you thought Z. Still, your trail of thought stayed unpredictable.

He was about to say something when his phone suddenly buzzed. Wingman handed it to him and he quickly read the message he received.

“Shit.” He muttered. “I’ve been called for a mission.”

When he read the callsigns of his teammates, he noticed that yours wasn’t there. He sighed. It seemed like your moment together was shortened for the day. A pity, really. He liked these moments.

You nodded slowly, stood up then stretched your arms. “Come back safe.”

‘Come back safe’ ?

Gekko stood up too and walked towards the exit door, Wingman following him. “I will. See you later.”

You said nothing back. You just stared until he fully exited the room.

Your words kept looping in his head during the briefing. 

The mission was the usual : eliminating Omega agents, defusing the spike then going back to base. It wasn't his first mission at Icebox, but being the Californian guy that he was, it wasn't his favorite place. The cold wind was whipping his face while the snow was burning his feet. He definitely should have chosen another pair of shoes and thicker socks. The mission was going smoothly: Jett and Phoenix were competing, Reyna was creepily laughing in the comm and Brimstone was complaining about the pain in his knees.

He sent Thrash to Jett and Phoenix because they fell in an ambush while he kept running where the spike had been spotted.

“Yo, I see the spike !” He said in the comm.

He then sent Dizzy to be sure no one was around before sending Wingman to the spike.

“My buddy is diffusing.” 

Suddenly, Gekko felt the hair in his neck rising and his instinct urged him to bend down and to take a few steps aside, which he did. 

“Damn.” He muttered under his breath.

His eyes immediately fell on Omega Yoru who just came out of a rift with a knife in his hand. Gekko just dodged his attack. He already had an history with this agent in particular. It wasn’t the first time that they ended up in a duel-like situation. Everytime, Yoru managed to manhandle him until Wingman stun him.

“Gekko ?” He heard Reyna in the comm. “What is happening? Where are you ?”

He took a deep breath and thought quickly. You taught him how to analyze a situation quickly and took advantage of it. 

“I’m site B.” He answered.

First step : not panicking. Panic not only leads people to make rushed actions, but it also quashes your thinking capacity. In a moment of panic, your reptilian brain is the one mostly working with your adrenaline.

‘Panic and fear are not to be confused.’ You oftenly reminded him. ‘In a dangerous situation, panic could easily lead you towards a certain death while fear keeps your senses constantly alert. It makes you more aware of your surroundings. It makes you think thoroughly at different solutions in order to survive.’

You did not only make him eat the floor. You also sometimes planned some meditation sessions. Gekko loved these. It made him feel light.

Gekko calmly watched Omega Yoru walking towards him. His step was confident. He played with a butterfly knife, visibly trying to intimidate him. Gekko almost rolled his eyes.

Second step : analyzing the situation, then your options. A thing that you insisted on : weapons never only had one way of utilization.

Right now, Wingman was diffusing the spike, Omega Yoru was walking in his direction and Thrash was too far. Dizzy could only blind him for a few seconds but then what ? His weapon was empty and he would lose deadly seconds reloading it. Yoru was walking calmly but a certain tension in his step indicated that he would soon pounce. He too had not a lot of options. His teammates were falling, the spike was being diffused and more enemies would soon arrive.

Gekko mentally counted until three then Yoru attacked him with the knife like he had planned. Gekko quickly countered the attack with the barrel of his gun and swiftly kicked his joint ball, making his opponent momentarily fall on his knee with a huff of pain. Yoru seemed surprised for an instant before he stood up again. This time, he was a bit more alert.

They kept fighting for seconds that felt like hours. Gekko was glad his stamina didn't fail him. He clearly had the upper hand while Yoru’s movements became slower and his breath more erratic. He almost found this easy. Compared to yours, Yoru’s attacks were slow and easy to predict. They had strength but lacked precision.

Finding an opening, Gekko suddenly tackled his opponent in the snow. He then proceeded to press with strength the round of his shoulder in the solar plexus of the mirror agent. You once explained to him that a violent shock in this zone would make anyone go limp. 

‘One could be as muscular as possible and have an iron will, once this zone is violently attacked, they would fall to the ground and gasp for air.’

Gekko felt his opponent’s strength faltering beneath him and his rage spiking. He heard Wingman’s high-pitched victorious scream and several hurried steps in his direction.

“Gekko, move !”

Recognizing Reyna’s voice, he obeyed quickly, standing up and taking a few steps back. A single shot and Yoru was now dead. Gekko let out a long sigh as Wingman and Thrash returned to him.

“You did good, you two.” He patted his radivore friends.

He then felt a friendly but strong pat in his back.

“Nice fight, mate !” Phoenix smiled. “You could almost be a duelist.”

Jett joined them then smiled mischievously at him.

“So you were actually training during these private sessions !”

Gekko cleared his throat to hide his blush but Reyna quickly cupped his face to inspect it. 

“¿Estás herido?”

He shook his head and smiled to reassure her. 

“I’m fine.”

Just slightly exhausted. He trained with you before this mission, after all. His muscles were sore and he was tired of the cold. His teeth were chattering and his body started to shake a little. But he tried to look fine so as not to worry her. Reyna could be quite overprotective over him.

“You did good, Gekko.”

“Gracias mi reina.”

He enjoyed the warmth of her hands on his cheeks and let out a small sigh of delight. He still couldn't feel his feet but it was a nice beginning.

“Seems like you improved some of your skills.” The Mexican duelist smiled.

Gekko felt proud at her words, his eyes twinkling in pride. He definitely had to thank you for this.

“Well, I have the best professor. Training can sometimes be brutal but I always learn something new after a session.”

Reyna raised an eyebrow but said nothing. She was already aware —like the entirety of the protocol— of his feelings for you. At first, she was quite suspicious of you, ready to pounce if you ever had the idea of using him. But once she saw the care in your eyes, she relaxed fully.

Gekko slept during the entire flight like a log. His head leaned on Reyna’s shoulder, he snored softly, his body warming up slowly. For an instant, he dreamed about his fight with the mirror agent and couldn't help but feel some pride. He took the situation calmly like you trained him for and busied while Wingman took care of the spike. For the first time since he joined the protocol, he felt like he didn't necessarily need a gun to be useful on the field.

Once the VLR/T landed, Reyna woke him up. He jolted awake under her amused gaze and quickly got off the aircraft to join the training room. He immediately found you meditating on a yoga mat. Despite his exhaustion, there was an excited skip in his steps. He quietly closed the door behind him, took a yoga mat in the back of the room, placed it in front of yours and sat on it, his legs criss-crossed. Wingman sat down next to him.

“You did come back safe.” You said without opening your eyes. 

“Yep !” Gekko grinned. “And it’s all thanks to what you taught me.”

You slowly opened your eyes to look at him with a raised eyebrow. You then looked down to Wingman who waved friendly at you, nodded at him in return and looked back at Gekko.

“Care to develop ?”

He nodded excitedly and with animated hands movements (and Wingman to illustrate his words), proceeded to recount the events of his missions. Pride flooded from his voice and sparkles from his eyes. It was maybe another simple mission, another moment in the routine of being an agent of Valorant, but he felt like he surpassed himself. He rubbed his neck sheepishly after he finished his story, a proud smile on his lips.

“The student surpasses the master.” You chuckled softly. “Seems like you won't need my training anymore.”

Gekko’s smile immediately faded away at your words. He shook his head and leaned forward to catch your hand. He didn't want these private sessions to stop. These moments were way too precious for him to let them go.

“No !” He calmed down a little, noticing how his tone raised. “I mean…I’ll probably need more training. I mean, more training from you !”

Wingman nodded with energy beside him. You blinked, surprised by his sudden outburst.

“No worries. I planned to train you to fight with a knife at our next session.” You said as you patted Wingman’s head gently. “Plus, I enjoy your company anyway.”

Gekko looked at you with wide eyes. His hands subconsciously squeezed yours. Wingman’s eyes also widened in shock.

“If you enjoy my company, why do you always avoid me outside of this room ?”

You tilted your head slightly and looked at him as if the answer was obvious. “You’re always surrounded by others. I’m not really comfortable with too many people around. Even though they're close co-workers.”

“Friends.” 

You raised an eyebrow at his intervention. “What ?”

“You mean friends, right ?”

You stayed silent for a few seconds and Gekko wondered why you saw the other agents under such cold eyes.

“Maybe Iso, Deadlock.” You hummed. “And you, of course.”  

Gekko’s hand squeezed yours again. 

“What about the others ?”

“They’re colleagues—”

“But—”

“Gekko.” You interrupted him. “They are your friends. Not mine.”

Gekko let out a huff and caressed the back of your hand with his thumb.

“And you’re okay with that ?”

Your eyes squinted a little. “Gekko, you’re a social butterfly. Being surrounded by people gives you energy. In my case, it drains me. And while people of your kind sometimes fascinate me, yes, I’m okay with that. And I’m not sad about it.”

You gently pulled your hand off his and stood up.

“Could you try understanding that for me ?”

He clenched and unclenched his now empty hand and watched you stretching your arms.

“Isn’t it cold to call others ‘co-workers’, though ?”

You momentarily paused your movements to look down at him.

“How would you call people you work with without being emotionally close ?”

Gekko stood up and started to stretch with you. “Fair point.” 

You two (three, let’s not forget Wingman) kept stretching quietly for minutes. Gekko was thinking as he looked at you closely. Neon and Jett would call him desperate, Yoru and Phoenix a simp but he did not care. He was happy with the evolution of his relationship with you. It started with staring you dreamily from afar to stretch with you while sometimes exchanging simple words.

“I’d like to thank you.” He suddenly said.

“You don’t owe me anything.” You lowered your arms and started to stretch your back. “But I’m starting to know you. You’re stubborn and you’ll do it anyway.”

Gekko grinned widely, his eyes filled with joy. “Yep. That’s me. And I’d like to ask you on a date.”

You stopped your movements and raised an eyebrow. “A date ?”

“Yeah. As a thank for all the, you know, the training. For teaching me your techniques, your knowledge and all that. Even if that was goddamn painful at first.”

“And that's not painful anymore ?”

Gekko paused for a moment then nodded, chuckling softly.

“Okay.” He huffed. “It’s still goddamn painful. But still. I’d like to thank you.”

“With a date ?”

“With a date.” He nodded. “You enjoy my company, right ?”

“Are you sure you want a date with me as a ‘thank you’ ?”

A sudden blush dusted his cheeks but his smile remained.

“Let’s say it's one of the reasons.”

Wingman was watching the interaction with an entertained eye.

“And could you do me the honor of telling me another reason ?”

You stopped stretching to stand straight. Gekko did the same, his smile still present.

“I like you.”

“Well you’re a masochist.”

The laugh that bursts out of Gekko's mouth was booming and shaking his body, loud enough to reverberate against the wall of the room and probably make anyone passing by the door jump in surprise. You watched him calmly as his laugh slowly faded. Wingman tossed a bottle of water at you and you took a few gulps and thanked him.

“Masochist with a loose screw, I see.” You hummed.

“I’ll take it.” He snorted. “So, what do you say ? Will you go on a date with me ?”

You took a few other gulps of water, your eyes still on him. He waited for what seemed like long minutes. Was he being too bold ? He liked spending time with you but he only had the training sessions. A date would be the perfect occasion to know you better.

“Why not ?” You finally said. “But don’t go thinking I’ll be softer during your training.”

Wingman jumped and chirped in joy, making Gekko chuckle again.

“I'm counting on it !” He said with cheeky grin. “I’m a masochist, remember ?”

You snorted and exited the room. 

Gekko hadn’t felt this proud in a long time. First, the mission, now you accepting to go on a date with him. Even though he was certain his friends will tease him, nothing could stop the joy that filled him at the moment. His smile was wide, his pupil dilated. You noticed that, of course. The excitement he tried so hard to hide didn't go unnoticed. You were fine with it, though. You found Gekko fascinating. Predictable at some moment, but fascinating. His company was enjoyable and warm. 

However, the evolution of your relationship with Gekko will be far from predictable in your eyes, but so enjoyable.

I really don't know how to write an ending that could satisfy me. It's like a curse that I have: the beginning is easy but never the end.

At the beginning, my brain goes like 'DO IT' but at the end it goes like 'Nah'.

Anecdote : I've practiced several martial arts since I was a kid. It's like a thing with my mother and each one of her children. (“As long as I am your mother, you, my child, will never be a prey.”— my mom) And as a martial artist, I can tell you that a violent shock to your solar plexus is not only painful, but it also desactivate automatically your capacity to stand on your feet. Your body just goes 'nope !'. The first time I received a hit on the solar plexus, I almost choked on my mouth guard and hurt my leg during the fall 🥲. Did it discourage me from practicing ? Nope ! But it is still a very...special memory.

Thanks again for taking the time to read until the end. I wish you a nice day/night !

It was well-known around the base that Iso had the best aim among all the agents of the protocol. You always admired his ability to just calmly shoot without a miss during any stressful mission. So of course, you wanted him to train you. You wanted to be more effective on the field, more reliable.

"Focus."

Easier said than done. If only your heart could beat at a steady rhythm. In your mind, a private tutoring session sounded like a good idea. But his hand on your waist, his chest against your back and his other hand overing yours as he helped you maintaining a good posture made your stomach lively with butterflies. And his teasing breath warming the back of your ear was absolutely not helping.

"Take a deep breath."

Unbeknownst to you, he took great fun teasing you like that. Feeling you all shaky and nervous against his chest, he found it adorable. But he also found you admirable. You did not hesitate to seek for help because you acknowledged your wicknesses. That was one of the many things he loved about you.

"Don't forget to prepare for the recoil of the gun." he murmured gently in your ear.

You took a deep breath and nodded, following his instructions faithfully and Iso had a small smile. He felt the shaking of your hand stop and your breath calming. Then, you shot right in the head of the target. He felt his heart melting when you looked at him with a proud smile.

You came for shooting lessons, but you had already shot into his heart.