Okay So You Know How Like? Golden Retrievers Will Hold An Egg In Their Mouth So Gently? And That Tumblr

okay so you know how like? golden retrievers will hold an egg in their mouth so gently? and that tumblr post about the person who put the egg in their mouth and immediately bit down on it? kristen (or fabian. fabian might) proposes that they try it (they are probably very drunk). adaine refuses to do it, but sets up an egg next to boggy and there’s a few tears shed over the two good round bois. fig does it and intentionally breaks the egg. kristen goes full monkey brain and also breaks it. fabian refuses to do it at first but gets peer pressured. he pulls out a quail egg and suddenly it’s a competition to see how many of those he can fit in his mouth. riz struggles to fit the egg and after a valiant attempt, cracks that bad boy open and nurses it like a fine liquor. gorgug is a golden retriever. he holds it so gently in his hands and he is so paranoid that he’s going to break it that he drops the first one. the second, though. fig takes a video and titles it “golden retriever himbo” and it gets a million views. gilear somehow gets roped into doing it and gets salmonella. kristen laughs so hard she pulls a muscle. twice. before she heals him. kristen was going to ask ayda, but riz wails about cannibalism and they devolve into a squabbling mess that ends in them just straight up throwing eggs at each other. eggs are now banned in mordred manor if there isn’t an adult there to supervise them.

hey, generally speaking i am pro-pirating but there is post going around with a free version of Maus by Art Spiegelman on a google doc and i am genuinely asking you all to not reblog it. Art Spiegelman is still alive. he still makes money off of Maus. and what is being monetized is his generational trauma as the son of a holocaust survivor. please either buy Maus or get it from the library (libraries also benefit the author and when more people request or check out a book it communicates to the library that they need more copies). pirating Maus is very different than pirating a marvel movie or reading a google doc of a book no longer in print. please use critical thinking.

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Dimension 20 (Web Series) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Margaret Encino/Princeps Zortch Characters: Margaret Encino, Princeps Zortch Additional Tags: First off: I'm sorry, Bulges and Nooks (Homestuck), (i'm sorry: again), Xenobiology, Tentacles, Interspecies Relationship(s), Interspecies Sex, Masturbation, authority kink, Praise Kink, Daddy Kink, Bad BDSM Etiquette, BDSM, Light BDSM, Dom/sub, Light Dom/sub, speedrunning into sex except its two parts now, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Tags May Change, Face Slapping, Nonbinary Character, Canon Non-Binary Character, title may change, Summary may change, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot Summary:

Zortch is, understandably, very attracted to Margaret Encino. Their boss, for all intents and purposes. And there's another title, too, that the crew has whispered amongst themselves that makes their blood run hot. Daddy. And, if they're reading Margaret right, then they're not the only one feeling something. An encounter ensues.

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dimension 20 (Web Series) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Kristen Applebees & Riz Gukgak Characters: Kristen Applebees, Riz Gukgak Additional Tags: Character Study, Sort of? - Freeform, Religion, Pre-Canon, Bible Quotes (Abrahamic Religions), Minor Injuries, Vomiting, Original Character(s), I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, No Beta We Die Like Gilear, I'm Bad At Titles Summary:

They had met once before, long before the Bad Kids had formed and perhaps before adventuring was at the forefront of their minds. They were far away from Saint Kristen Applebees and Riz Gukgak, Licensed Investigator. They were just Kristen Applebees, follower of Helio and Riz Gukgak, aka Briefcase Kid. 11 years old, freckled and sunburnt in the middle of August, standing on either side of the street. A human who felt a calling deep within her chest and a goblin who held all the answers to Kristen's questions.

okay i usually don’t like these kinds of posts but i was having a discussion with some friends from different part of the country/world sooo….. 

reblog and put in the tags where you’re from/whether or not you consider the tap water clean enough to drink I am actually genuinely curious. I’m from florida and i’ve been told that it’s usually unsafe to drink unfiltered. 

fuck dental insurance, please help

hi i’m peach, disabled & unable to work, your local mental health disaster! today i tried getting my wisdom teeth out just numbed up but i couldn’t do it. it hurt and eventually the doctor said “we should refer you somewhere they’ll put you to sleep”, and i very much agree.

and that will be around $800. i don’t have a solid number yet, will update as soon as i do.

we can barely afford to buy groceries so there is no way for me to get this money. i promise i’m going to try to find work and get some but i don’t think i’ll be able to come up with it all. i have 2 months.

0/800

(at the very, very least, i would like nitrous, and that’s only $200. i would very much prefer to get completely knocked out, though. i nearly had an anxiety attack during the procedure and broke down in tears after the doctor left. i don’t know if nitrous is enough, but if i don’t make enough money, i will accept that. anything would be better than how horribly it went today.)

((if i make it to 200 but not 800, i will return everything over the 200.))

please reblog if you can!<3 endless thanks to you