Hello Have This Dumb Fucking Mess Of A Thing - Tumblr Posts

okay so you know how like? golden retrievers will hold an egg in their mouth so gently? and that tumblr post about the person who put the egg in their mouth and immediately bit down on it? kristen (or fabian. fabian might) proposes that they try it (they are probably very drunk). adaine refuses to do it, but sets up an egg next to boggy and there’s a few tears shed over the two good round bois. fig does it and intentionally breaks the egg. kristen goes full monkey brain and also breaks it. fabian refuses to do it at first but gets peer pressured. he pulls out a quail egg and suddenly it’s a competition to see how many of those he can fit in his mouth. riz struggles to fit the egg and after a valiant attempt, cracks that bad boy open and nurses it like a fine liquor. gorgug is a golden retriever. he holds it so gently in his hands and he is so paranoid that he’s going to break it that he drops the first one. the second, though. fig takes a video and titles it “golden retriever himbo” and it gets a million views. gilear somehow gets roped into doing it and gets salmonella. kristen laughs so hard she pulls a muscle. twice. before she heals him. kristen was going to ask ayda, but riz wails about cannibalism and they devolve into a squabbling mess that ends in them just straight up throwing eggs at each other. eggs are now banned in mordred manor if there isn’t an adult there to supervise them.