US, AGAIN .

US, AGAIN .ೃ࿐

pairing. itoshi sae x gn!reader

genre. second chance (exes back to lovers!) | a bit of small town romance | a sprinkle of childhood friends to lovers (past) | angst with a happy ending 

content/warnings. 5.2k+ wc | characters are aged 25 in the present | pro-athlete!sae x coffee shop owner!reader | sae left for spain at 19 in here | mentions of sae’s vague past (especially the striker dream) | itoshi bros conflict never happened here let me be delusional | heavy in narration | minimal proofread

in which: itoshi sae returns to the only place on earth he vows to never set foot again.

💭 flashbacks are italicized and indented :>

Six years.

In those six long years of his absence, you couldn't deny that you rehearsed countless scenarios of encountering him upon his return. 

If by chance he still wanted to see you, or even look at you, you imagined giving him a small smile, a carefully crafted facade of composure, before gracefully walking away, as if life had moved on effortlessly for both of you.

That’s what you imagined. Just walk away, like how life went on for the both of you. 

But reality never seemed to align with your reveries. The sight of him wasn't remotely serene enough to prompt a composed exit. Seeing him made your throat tighten, and your heart danced in a rhythm only he could create.

Six damn years had passed since you last saw him on that balcony, and now, with him back in town, avoiding him seemed like the only right thing to do.

You don’t know how long he’ll be here, but it is now your life mission to avoid him at all cost. Today's encounter was just an unfortunate event—an inevitable twist of fate. Their house was literally right in front of your family's, making it hard to escape the nearness of the past.

“So, he’s back in town?” 

Hari's voice, your co-worker and now a dear friend, snapped you back from the reverie of yesterday's memories. The sound of her voice broke through the nostalgic haze, pulling you back to the present.

“What?”

“I asked if your childhood friend who is also a superstar slash professional athlete slash your only ex is back,” she mischievously asked, even miming quotation marks to emphasize each title she created.

You chuckled softly, shaking your head at her antics. Your gaze drifted to the freshly baked pastries, their delightful aroma greeting your senses like a warm embrace as you artfully displayed them on the shelves. The familiar scent of coffee and delightful confections used to calm you, but now it mingled with the storm of emotions inside.

“Yeah, it's basically the talk of the town. He's famous after all,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and still focused on your work, using it as a shield to hide your vulnerability.

But in reality, the sight of him earlier had caught you off guard, and you had turned the other way to avoid him. Your heart was still racing from the almost encounter, and the comforting ambiance of your coffee shop provided little solace.

“Did he see you?”

“I pray to all saints that he didn’t,” you deadpanned, your facade of composure beginning to falter.

“What did he look like now?”

You hesitated, your mind flashing back to that fleeting glimpse of him earlier.

Far from what was once mine. “Good.”

“That’s it? Good?”

No. He looked gorgeous. He looked painfully gorgeous.

“What do you want me to say?” you countered, throwing a side glance to her persistence.

In that fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of how much he had changed. He looked undeniably handsome, lean, and with a certain maturity that hadn't been there before.

He… looked different.

And that's good—for you and for him. It meant that life there treated him well, and it eased some of the lingering guilt you carried.

You and Hari fell into a consuming silence, your backs turned away from each other. Even with closed eyes, you sensed that she wanted to ask something. You didn't want to initiate the conversation, but this suffocating silence had to go.

As you stepped behind the counter, you were met with Hari's concerned eyes and a voice laden with hesitation. “What are you going to do then?” she carefully asked.

You pressed your lips together, momentarily at a loss for words.

So you did what you do best: mask hurting with laughter.

“Is there anything I should do?” you paused, the sound of your fake laughter ringing in your ears. “It's been years. We made a choice.”

But Hari wasn't ready to let the matter rest, and you don’t know how to tell her you’re close to calling it a day. “You made a choice for him,” she countered gently, her tone filled with empathy.

Stunned was an understatement. Caught off guard would be an apt description. But speechless was exactly how you felt.

That, you couldn't mask with anything.

So you did what you weren’t best at: admitting the truth.

“And I’ll do it again,” you whispered in return. It was faint, because it was more for you than more of a reply to her. 

You were both young, and half oblivious to what it would be like outside, where the world wasn’t painted in golden hues and the gentle waves were replaced by blaring cars.

You were both seventeen, young and living for the hope of it all.

But you lived for days like those – days where both of you just had to be kids still. No worries, no voices of what might come.

“Tell me about your dreams, Sae.” “Tch. You already know about it.”

You did. All of it, you knew. Since you were kids, no one knew him like you did. You were his lover and confidant. You knew about it, all too well and all too much.

“Come on!” you persisted, giving him an enthusiastic look. “The sky looks so pretty in this sunset, I want it to know about us.” The setting sun painted the sky in hues of pink and orange, casting a warm glow over the beach as you and Sae sat side by side in the sand. The sound of gentle waves caressed your ears, creating a serene backdrop for your beach date. He hesitated for a moment, looking out at the horizon. Then there it was, a glint of determination flashed in his usually reserved eyes. “To be the best striker in the world.” You couldn't help but be captivated by the sight. It was the first time you had seen such an unusual spark in his eyes. Sae's gaze was often cold and impersonal, but now it was as if stars were hanging in his eyes, reflecting the infinite possibilities of his dreams. Sae is handsome, mysteriously beautiful even. But this, nothing will beat how dreamy he looks when he speaks of his craft. You liked this look on him - so ambitious, so driven. It made your heart flutter with admiration. Seeing this glint in his eyes right now, you knew you wanted to do anything in your power to let it stay there.

And you did, you held on and held out. Until you turned nineteen, when you had let him go to the big cities where he rightfully belonged. 

You smiled, a genuine, heartwarming smile, and leaned in to press a tender kiss on his cheek. “I’m sure you will be the best.”

Maybe you bit off more than what you could chew, but in the end, you’d do it all over again. Because what you did, the choice you made – it was for the best.

You were both nineteen, young and eager to grasp the world's offerings with hopeful hands. 

But despite the certainty you tried to hold onto, there were nights when the memories tugged at your heartstrings like it did now. You knew it was the right choice, that you both needed to chase your dreams separately — especially his dreams. But it didn't erase the whispers of what-ifs that occasionally crept into your mind.

But life — life went on. Life never waits for anyone, anyway. And so, you worked diligently to craft a future that no longer had room for regrets.

But love leaves echoes, and his presence back in town stirred those dormant feelings. With him being in the same place, you felt like a stranger in your own town.

It was easier when he was thousands of miles away, an untouchable star on a different horizon. But now, with the universe conspiring to bring you close again, you couldn't help but feel like a wanderer in the galaxy of memories you built together.

After all, everything here in this town is about you and him. 

Six years.

Was it that long? He couldn’t really tell. Maybe time really does pass fast when your life is falling apart.

It has been six years since Sae has sat on the balcony of his childhood home. And like the sick bastard fate was, he’s welcomed by the sight of your horrified yet still so damn fucking beautiful face.

Perhaps the saints you prayed to didn’t hear any of your pleas, because despite calling out to each one, Sae saw you.

There you were, a flicker in the periphery of his vision, desperately trying to avoid him. He was trained to be very aware of his field of vision, so there was no way he wasn’t able to notice your frantic leaving and the hurried closing of your house’s door as you noticed him. 

He let you be, holding back the overwhelming desire to call out your name like he used to when both of you were running late to class. He let you be, because if you were to ask him, he wouldn’t know how to look you in the eye without a thousand words reflecting on his own. 

[Attention, everyone. This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 924 to Madrid, Spain. Again, this is the final –] “Sae, you’re going to miss your flight. They’re not coming.” No. “They’re not coming, Sae. You have to get on the plane.” No. No. Shut up.

He needed you there, more than anyone. A thousand people could cheer and show up for Itoshi Sae, but his eyes will always search the crowd for just one — just yours.

Yet, alas, you were nowhere to be found. And so, that very same day, Sae vowed to never come back to this place.

He hated this town and you, he’s convinced.

Sae had always been indifferent to a lot of people, everyone knew that. But never in a hundred years would anyone who knew you both think you’d be on that list. And deep down, he didn’t want to believe it either – until that day you decided not to show up when you promised you would.

He wasn't stupid. He had an inkling of why you did what you did. Yet, irrationality overpowered reason, and all he wanted that day was to run the distance between the airport and your house – to see your face, to remind you that he had plans, plans for both of you.

When Sae’s manager informed him that he needed to come home for a while to renew his passport, it was as if all of his suppressed recollections of this place – of you, came pouring out to his soul all at once.

Every street, every corner, every memory — they all threatened to consume him. His family, Rin, this town, and you – you were all the things he left behind for the dream.

Dream. Best Striker in the world. What did it even mean? Long ago, he thought he knew.

But it had to work. Everything had to work. He lost you for this dream. And if he loses it too, then what does that make him? A sore failure. And Sae was never known to be admissible to failing.

Whatever hell he encountered on the other side of the world, he swore he would never return home. Even when he was traversing across a path to ruin of being the person he thought he would be, he would never ever choose to come home.

Anywhere, but here. Anywhere, but home.

So there he was, the renowned glorious prodigy of japan. He was close to everything after countless mishaps. 

He’s getting closer and closer to the new dream yet getting farther and farther away from home.

Home. What does it even mean? Lately, he doesn’t even know. 

And after that day, no one ever mentioned your name to him. No one in his new world knew about you. No one knew how Itoshi Sae's world used to revolve around someone's soft smiles and easy eyes. 

He never asked anyone not to mention you; he wasn't one to ask, after all. But for some reason, no one dared to. Not even Rin. It was as if one mention of you in his presence was a carefully crafted brick used to make his castles crumble to the ground.

He hated that, but maybe they were right. Because with just a second's worth of a glimpse of you from earlier, Sae indeed felt his castles crumbling, piece by piece.

He hates you, for making his resolve crumble. For being the one person who can make his vow to never look back fall apart.

He hates you, because everything in this forsaken place is about you and him. Memories of your shared youth are etched into the very walls and streets, haunting him like ghosts of a past he can't escape.

He hates you, for not trusting you two would work it out somehow, and for giving up before the game even began.

He hates you, because it was easier that way. Easier to pretend he didn't care, that you didn't matter, and that you were just another soul he knows a little too much of.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more, and yet he knows, only one of it was true – and that he hates you for making him convince himself that he does, just to cope with leaving half of his heart to the only place he vowed never to come back to.

It was a jinx to say that yesterday’s encounter was already an unfortunate event, because today, you literally learned a whole new degree of unfortunate and unlucky – by having Itoshi Sae as your first customer of the day. 

“Welcome! How may I help you toda— S-Sae.”

And to even top it off, today was Hari’s day off. It meant that you’re currently alone in the same confined four-cornered room with the person you swore you would avoid like it’s your life mission.

Damn it, Hari. Of all days. Her day off really had to be today.

Itoshi Sae, in the goddamn flesh, is standing in your place two meters away from you, yet you’re having a hard time feeling your feet on the ground and your heart beating so damn loud. 

He wasn’t looking at you (thank god), and had his eyes exploring the place with a neutral expression playing on his face. Suddenly, you feel like sixteen again back when he was looking at the first set of cookies you’ve ever baked and you were dying to hear what he thinks of your craft.

“It’s yours?”

You gulp. 

You gulped down the urge to tear up with how much his voice changed. You gulped down the urge to cry because he assumed you had your dream turn into reality too.

“Yeah,” you replied in whisper, your eyes following where he was looking, trying to avoid any chance it will meet his, “it’s not much but —”

“It’s beautiful.” Even before Sae could hear your meek comment of yourself, he cut you off.

You were always like that —downplaying your hard work, belittling yourself even before someone does. He hated that about you. 

He used to get mad at you for it, especially when someone made fun of you at school and you didn’t defend yourself. He always makes you cry whenever he points it out, so he stopped. Instead, he made it his role to rebuild your confidence. Sae wasn't known for being generous in compliments. It would probably take one hand to count all the instances that he genuinely called someone along the lines of not dumb, stupid, lukewarm. 

But it was never the case with you. With you, to say beautiful was always a second nature to Sae's tongue.

And he wasn’t lying though. Your coffee shop was really charmingly cozy, and so like you. It’s so much alike to what you used to tell him how you envisioned it would be. 

The coffee shop was a quaint haven nestled right at the edge of the sandy shore. Its exterior, adorned with weathered wooden panels and soft, warm hues, exuded a rustic charm that welcomed passersby with open arms. Sunlight spilled through large windows, casting gentle rays that danced upon the vintage, mosaic-tiled floor.

It’s beautiful, and it’s in front of our place. He wanted to say to you, but he stopped at beautiful not wanting to make things more awkward than it should.

The coffee shop, it’s right in front of the beach. It’s in front of that one spot you and him used to call ours. 

It’s the first thing he noticed before coming inside, and it made him wonder whether you knew or he’s the only one who remembers it even now.

Bashful, you uttered a silent thank you to his remark, “What would you like to order?” you followed up, trying to maintain composure despite your heart racing in your chest.

Noticing that he’s been too silent for someone who’s about to order something, you looked up to your menu, and immediately, you understood his silence. If one were to point out, it is too immediate for someone who’s almost strangers to each other.

“We have non-caffeinated drinks too,” you hurriedly said to him, your voice quivering slightly as you tried to break the spell of awkward silence.

He gulps, his eyes locked with yours in a moment that felt like eternity.

He can’t drink coffee, it ruins his body clock, and you knew that. You still know that.

It appears that he's not the only one who remembers, after all.

A thousand emotions danced in his eyes, each one a testament to the love that once blossomed between you. The coffee shop, once a quaint haven, now felt like a crucible of emotions, and the atmosphere was thick with unspoken words, heavy with the weight of what could have been.

Your breath caught in your throat, and you couldn't look away, despite the rush of memories and unspoken words flooding your mind. It was as if time had folded in on itself, and you were once again those young souls who found solace in each other's presence.

But this was different, much more complicated. The past was a turbulent sea, and even though you had both moved on with your lives, there was still a deep, lingering connection that couldn't be severed.

Yet, you knew better than to let those emotions take control. You made a choice, you have to stand by it.

You were no longer the naive teenagers who believed love could conquer all. Reality had taught you both harsh lessons, and the wounds of the past still lingered, threatening to reopen with each stolen glance.

“I’ll have your best seller of it then,” he finally broke the silence, his voice steady despite the tempest inside.

With a nod, you turned to prepare his order, your hands trying to steady themselves. You couldn't help but wonder if he noticed the tremor in your fingers or the way your heart seemed to echo in every beat.

As you handed him his drink, your fingertips brushed lightly against his hand, and for a brief moment, the world stood still.

He took the cup from you, and for a fleeting moment, you both lingered, almost as if neither of you wanted to let go. He could stay in this, playing pretend. Pretend none of it happened, pretend he never left, pretend it worked out in the end.

But he can’t, not when you stepped back first, breaking the contact between you and reminding him of the choice you made.

“Thank you,” he managed to say, his voice softer now, filled with a hint of something even he couldn't quite decipher.

“You’re welcome,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

And just like that, the moment passed, slipping through your fingers like sand. He turned to leave, and you watched him walk away, every step taking him farther from the life you once shared.

Perhaps, in some parallel universe, there existed a version of you who chose differently, who stayed intertwined with him in a tale of love that defied all odds. But here, in this reality, both of you were no longer who you used to be.

In this universe, you're just some two ghosts standing in the place of you and him, haunted by the memories of what once was while trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat.

After Sae’s visit yesterday, saying that you weren’t doing fine would be a gross understatement. 

Your emotions were all over the place, and you couldn't seem to find a stable ground for your thoughts. It didn't help when your parents casually mentioned that he was leaving town later today. Apparently, Mrs. Itoshi had a little gossip session with the neighbors, unknowingly revealing a piece of her oldest son's business.

He’s leaving, and that's good—for you and for him.

As you stood behind the counter of the coffee shop, you absentmindedly glanced out the window, your eyes drawn to the beach. The sight of the shore brought back a flood of memories.

Maybe in another life, the two of you could still dance along the sandy shore, playfully splashing water at each other. He would chase after you, catching hold of your waist as he sweeps you off your feet. And perhaps, just perhaps, you would have the chance to embrace him tightly once again, with your arms wrapped around his neck while you share a kiss as greedy and fiery as the sea’s yearning for the moon.

And maybe, in another life, your story wouldn’t end with both of you being strangers who know a little too much about each other.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice the tears streaming down your cheeks until Hari whispered, “Y/N... you're crying.”

“Oh, I am,” you admitted, trying to regain your composure.

Your heart lurched as you tried to suppress the tears, but they kept flowing relentlessly. “Hari…” you whispered, shocked by your own emotional outpouring.

Hari's eyes reflected pity as she watched you, her voice soft and understanding. “Go,” she encouraged, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Get your man. I'll take care of everything here.”

The words hit you like a lifeline, a spark of hope igniting within you. You quickly removed your apron and grabbed your keys, determined to catch him before it was too late. 

But before you could dash out, Hari's voice echoed through the shop, loud and clear, “Go! Be happy! And for the love of god, no more sacrifices as a love language!”

With one last glance at her and your coffee shop, you rushed out the door.

The airport seemed like a maze of bustling strangers as you frantically searched for the departure gates. Every passing second felt like an eternity, the fear of missing him consuming you.

Desperation and determination fueled your steps as you approached the flight attendant, your voice trembling, “Flight to Spain — I need to know about the flight to Spain for today.”

The attendant looked at you with sympathy, “I'm sorry, but all flights to Spain have already left. The last one left twenty minutes ago.”

Your heart sank, but you couldn't give up that easily. “Can you check again? Please. I-I need to see him. Please.”

The attendant double-checked, but the outcome remained unchanged. 

Twenty damn minutes. You lost him in just that short amount of time.

Your heart shattered as you realized you had missed your chance. The desperation in your eyes was evident as you felt your world crumbling around you.

In the midst of the bustling airport, you allowed yourself to grieve for what could have been and for the chances you never took.

Six years ago, you were supposed to be here. And maybe if you did, you wouldn't find yourself six years after, wishing you did things differently.

The drive back felt like the longest journey of your life. 

The sinking sun painted the sky with hues of orange and pink as you approached the familiar place. As you got closer, you noticed that the shop was already closed, and you assumed Hari had taken care of everything. 

But what caught you off guard was the sight of Sae standing there, in front of your place, with a suitcase by his side, as if he were meant to be on a flight rather than standing there.

“You're here,” you whispered, your heart pounding in your chest as you got closer.

“I’m here.”

“Why didn't you leave?” you asked.

Because I’m done convincing myself that I hate you, Sae hesitated to say.  “Why did you go to the airport?” he countered instead, avoiding your question.

Because I’m done telling myself that I did the right thing. 

There were so many things you wanted to say, but the words were caught in your throat. You bit your lip, not ready to answer his question just yet.

Impatient and desperate, Sae took his chances to ask you the only question that mattered to him at this point, “Tell me you don't love me anymore. I will go. I will do as you please. I just need to hear it from you.”

Your eyes widened at his sudden question, but Sae wasn’t done yet. “Answer me. It’s a yes or no question.”

Lost in a whirlwind of emotions, you couldn't hold back the torrent of words that poured from your heart.

“A yes or no question, you say? Every night, I think of you.”

With each word, your voice wavered, and you couldn't help but express the worries that had plagued you during his absence.

“Were you eating properly? Does the food there suit your liking? You’re a bit picky. Is it too hot there? Were you taking your supplements? Were you being hard on yourself again? Is... is there someone new? There must be, right?”

As the words left your lips, you realized just how much you had been consumed by thoughts of him, wondering about every aspect of his life, even when he was miles away from you.

His reaction to you holding forth seemed to intensify at your last question, but right now, you weren’t ready to listen to him. He needs to listen to you.

“Every single night of the past six years, I yearned for you. I yearned to have you close. I yearned to hold your face just once more. And fuck, I would’ve traded all my tomorrows for just one yesterday with you.”

With those words, the floodgates of emotion burst open, and tears streamed down your cheeks. 

Fuck, six years. For six years, you held on and held out. Would it have been easier if both of you had tried, and along the way, lost? Would it have alleviated the pain of what-ifs and what could have been's if you had bargained, if you had gambled? Or would it all have led you right back to this moment, grappling with the same heartache and uncertainty?

Finally, meeting his eyes, you saw a reflection of your own emotions in his. But you weren’t done yet.

“And you dare ask me if I love you. Well, does that answer your fucking question, Itoshi?”

“Then, don’t cross it out. Don’t ever cross it out again.”

Cross what…out?

“I saw your letter,” Sae admitted, causing a momentary confusion to wash over you. 

My letter… Bewildered, you couldn't form the right words, and he took it as a sign to continue, and to close the distance between you to hold your hands.

“Tell me, how could I leave after reading that, knowing the only soul who truly knew me was here? You own me, Y/N.”

“I told you countless times before, you own me,” Sae reaffirmed, his grip on your hand tightening as he drew it closer to his lips, planting tender kisses upon your skin. 

“There was no one,” he continued, his words carrying a sense of reassurance. “And there's no other warmth comparable to yours that I'd ever let myself bask in. And if there's any, I'd be only fooling myself, pretending it was you instead.”

Sae's voice grew softer, yet resolute. “You own me, even when I'm on the other side of the world. You own me, Y/N. Even in the distance that separated us, even in the years that you claim I'm not."

He stepped closer, his eyes locked with yours, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. “No place can ever own me as much as you do. So, don't ever cross your I love you's to me. I want them – all. I don't want your sorry's.”

“But I’m sorry,” you whispered, for the last time. But Sae gently wiped away your tears.

“It's ‘I love you’ from now on.”

For a moment, you both stayed like that, trying to make up for the lost time. Sae, much like you, dreamed of the day he gets to hold you close once again. He dreamed of a day he gets to watch the sunset from the reflection of your eyes again.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more reasons why he shouldn't be standing here, and yet he knew, only one of it was true – and that he hated himself for convincing himself that he shouldn't be here – to you, in his hometown.

Sae may have vowed to never come back to this place, but it was always a lie, because for all he knew, it's the only place he truly belonged. Half of his heart was left here, with you.

“Come on,” Sae said, and you followed him, curiosity in your eyes.

“Where are we going?”

“There,” Sae pointed to the beach, your spot, specifically. “To our place. The sky looks pretty, and I want it to know about us, again.”

“Us... again?” you asked hesitantly.

“If you would take me back.” Sae answered, a hint of fear in his eyes, afraid that he might be assuming this second chance for the two of you.

You took his hand in response, and squeezed it three times. “I want nothing more than to be with you, again.”

Without any more words, Sae gently cupped your cheeks, his touch sending shivers down your spine. The touch of his fingers was both familiar and new.

In the fading light of the day, his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that made your heart race. The anticipation hung heavy in the air as you leaned closer to each other, your breath hitched as his warm breath mingled with yours.

His lips were soft against yours, and as they moved with a tenderness that mirrored the way he held you, it was as if he was trying to convey everything he had ever wanted to say to you in that one, passionate moment.

The kiss deepened, and you could feel the intensity of his emotions pouring into it. It was a kiss that spoke of all the words left unsaid, of all the nights spent missing each other, and of all the dreams of a future together.

Feeling the tears streaming down your cheeks, Sae pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. And in that moment, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be – here.

To you, in his hometown. 

💭 thank you for the request saetorinrin! (i owe you a lot for your patience i guess..)

note. hi. if you’ve been here before, you might know that i hate this trope with a burning passion, i just can’t write it for the life of me. i started this in may (and only had the guts to finish it this month lmao), i was so tempted to delete everything and start from scratch (for the nth time) but i think i owe it to myself to retain most of what i wrote when i was stranded on an island xd this isn’t my best, that, i know for sure. but i hope you’ll still like it ! 

💌 if you reached this part, and you want to know about reader’s letter that sae’s was referencing, here it is. you may or may not read this, it won’t really matter. but if you want to, click until the end :>

💭 back to: milestone event

“can you just hold still please?!” you exclaimed taking a step back from your boyfriend.

“ok well i didn’t know this was gonna hurt this bad..” he mutters, rubbing his eyebrows.

“rin, it’s not that bad.” you deadpan.

he looks up at you, through his eyelashes, almost pouting. his hair is pinned back with your hair clips that have little stars on them, and his eyebrows are semi furrowed. he looks adorable. you stifled a giggle as you step back towards him.

he was donned on top of the toilet with the seat down, while you were hovering over his left leg, trying to clean up his eyebrows. he was the one who wanted to do this after all…

“i’m almost done okay.” you say softly, pressing a kiss to his bare forehead. he mutters something, but you’re too focused on him. there is soft music playing from the phone on the sink. your hands are gently placed on his temple, and moving around his eyebrows. he twiddles with his hands, not quite sure what to do with them. he wants to hold you, it seems almost fitting in this position, but he’s not sure if you’d be comfortable with it. you two had been dating for a little, and your relationship was still developing. one of the hardest things for him to get used to was physical touch. now that he had it, he yearned for it but always had a hard time reciprocating it or initiating it.

“i’m almost done i promise, i just gotta get this part over here..” you said, droning off as you focus once more. all he can do is stare at the necklace hanging around your neck, with his jersey number on it. he smiles softly to himself.

picking his chin up with your other hand, you make eye contact with him. he looks at you, eyes wide.

“what are you giggling about mister.” you say faking seriousness. he smiles softly, and you can’t help but plant a soft kiss on his lips. as you do, he slips his hand on the side of your thigh. as you focus once more on his eyebrows, trying not to focus on his touch too much.

he’s rubbing circles in your soft thigh with his thumb, and you can’t tell if he’s comforting himself or you.

“ok let me see.” you say, putting a finger below his chin and lifting it. he’s looking up at you, his lashes fluttering calmly as his teal eyes bore into yours.

you couldn’t help but get flustered. “i’m all done rin.” you say, giving him a small kiss on the nose. he immediately gets up and checks the mirror, looking at his brows. now you can really see the height difference, as it is normal for him to look down on you and not the other way around. “the clips are still in your hair y’know.” you nonchalantly say, liking the look they gave him. “though you look pretty with your hair back too…” you say trailing off, picking up the cotton pads from the counter you had used.

in an instant he is grabbing your arm to turn you around, and cupping your face. he kisses you, softly but you can feel the love behind it. he rubs an innocent finger over your bottom lip, “thank you.” your eyes are wide now, and your mouth slightly open. you weren’t used to him acting like this, and it clearly showed. all you could mutter out was an “o-okay” while he smiled to himself while taking the clips out of his hair, while you stood there shocked.

“why are you standing there like that?”

“i-well i’m not used to you acting like this! not that i don’t like it i-i i like it, im just- it’s catching me off guard you know and i-“

“wow.” he says simply looking at you, his lip curling. “is this the effect i have on you??”

“rin i will pluck all your eyebrow hairs off right now.” you say, seriously.

thin line

synopsis: four times itoshi rin said he hated you, and the one time he finally said the truth.

pairing: itoshi rin x gn!reader | words: 5k (insane) | warnings: enemies to (implied) lovers, cursing (rin being rin), rin is a total tsundere and emotionally constipated, banter, teasing, one (1) sexual implication towards the end, i use the word hate a lot, kinda proofread

notes: oh my GOD. you have no idea how hard it was for me to write (and finish!) this. writer's block has been kicking my ass really hard and honestly i don't even know if i like this but i swear to god if this flops i'll kms. (jk. maybe. or not.)

masterlist sae's 4+1

i.

itoshi rin was a hater. 

he didn’t consider himself one, naturally. rin thought he was a pretty chill guy, but apparently, everyone who had some sort of interaction with the younger itoshi felt the same kind of vibe coming from him. at least, it was what his stupid teammates said after claiming rin was always hating on something — whether it was the line in the coffee shop being too long, every pass given to him by isagi or the librarian with “a stupid fish-face”.

on his defense, no one liked long lines, isagi had two left feet when it came to passing and the librarian was a fucking weirdo. even if he was a hater, he had a plausible reason for everything he hated. 

“itoshi.”

that included you, of course.

rin was pretty convinced it was impossible not to hate you. every time he entered your shared biology class, a mere look at you was enough for his irk to grow even more. everything about you was just obnoxious.

you were loud. and, although unpleasant, that wouldn’t be much of a problem if you just weren’t unable to shut the fuck up and stop rambling excitedly at every friend you met. and you had many. you were some kind of weird social butterfly with infinite energy for social interactions — in a way, you reminded him of bachira. 

but bachira was not always jumping at every chance to refute him with a know-it-all smirk. bachira wasn’t perpetually ready to throw witty remarks at his rudeness. and bachira definitely didn’t have a pretty gleam on his eyes every time he headbutted with rin.

in short, you were everything itoshi rin hated. and the worst part was that you knew. you knew how much your very existence annoyed him, and it seemed like you took as your life mission to make the next two years of his life a living hell. 

“itoshi.” your voice reached his ears again. well, maybe if he just ignored you, you would… “itoshi!”

“what the fuck do you want?” he snapped, diverting his attention from the match playing on his phone to look at you. “i told you not to call me that.”

another thing he hated — to be called by his last name. it reminded him way too much of sae, and that was something rin didn’t want to do. but it wasn’t like he was going to tell you that, so he’d rather let you think he just didn’t want you to address him at all. which wasn’t a lie, either. 

you gave him a puzzled look, tilting your head like an innocent puppy. a fake naivety, of course. “we’re not close enough for me to call you by your first name, though.”

“thank fuck.” 

your eyes rolled at that. “language, itoshi.” he glared at you again, and you fixed your posture, putting your hands on the back pockets of your jeans. the malicious smile you gave sent chills down his spine. 

“well, i just came to deliver you the news since you missed last period. there’s a project worth 75% of our grade to be delivered in two months, and guess what? we’re together!”

oh, hell no.

“you tell terrible jokes.”

“i’m serious, though. if you don’t believe me, just ask your friends,” you said, so absentmindedly that rin felt his blood pressure rising. he opened his mouth to retort, but you beat him to it. “and before you try, the teacher already said no one can work alone and that the pairs cannot be exchanged.”

his left eye twitched, and he was pretty sure all his muscles were tight and ready to combust. life just couldn’t give him a break, could it? it was like he was being punished — forced to work with you, of all people. what a fucking nightmare. 

how the hell was he supposed to endure two months of constant interactions with your annoying sassiness and the pretty curve of your lips when you smirked? it might just drive him crazy. 

“so, when can we start, partner?”

rin rolled his eyes so hard they almost got stuck on the back of his skull. 

“i hate you.”

ii.

the soccer field was probably the only place rin felt at peace. the smell of grass and sweat was as familiar as his home, much like the round shape of the ball on his feet and the path to the goal. despite his rowdy teammates and their dumb antics, there wasn’t much that was able to distract him and break this peacefulness.

“itoshi!”

there was still something, though. or someone, for that matter.

the shock of seeing you in his “happy place” was so big rin nearly tripped on the ball, successfully letting bachira steal it from him. the snickers from reo and isagi made his skin boil with anger, but his harsh glare was directed at you — the fucking source of all his problems. 

and no, he was not being dramatic. 

“what are you doing here.” 

it wasn’t really a question, more like a veiled threat; but you seemed oblivious to it, or simply didn’t care about his reaction. something in him even thought you liked getting on his nerves. he was sure of it when you smirked.

“the project, dummy. we need to start today if we want to get it done in time. it’s pretty long, hence why we have two months.”

“i can’t today,” was all he said. 

“why?”

“because,” rin spat with venom on his tongue, “i have an important game next week.”

you stared at him in silence. rin would have thought about how the sun shining on your back framed you with a perfect halo and gave you a nearly angelic look if he wasn’t so busy controlling the heat on his face from your scrutiny. he hated when you did that. he hated you. 

“we have to start today, itoshi. i’ll wait until you finish practicing so we can go to the library.”

he hated your stubbornness. he hated your voice, too — how it sounded like a siren’s melody, ready to trap him and bring him to the bottom of the ocean.

“fine. suit yourself.”

the young itoshi turned around and went back to the field, ignoring aryu’s pestering and shidou asking about who you were and if he could have your number. rin pondered if a yellow card was worth shutting up the insect, but eventually decided against it; he didn’t want ego to bench him, especially when they were so close to the tournament next week. 

the rest of the game went pretty smoothly, although rin and his teammates could tell he had half of his focus on the sidelines, where you sat prettily at the stands with your laptop. a perpetual scowl was on his face throughout the rest of the match. you were so damn distracting it was annoying. 

once the match was over, some of the boys went home, while others continued practicing, rin being one of them. he was expecting you to grow tired and give up, especially considering it was getting darker and colder, but you didn’t waver. your face was still present on the stands, haunting him even if he closed his eyes. you even had the audacity to smile when your gazes crossed.

he hated your smile. he did. 

hours passed until every one of his teammates had gone home, and rin was the only one left in the field. deciding it was finally enough (and not admitting he was starting to worry for you), he stopped his moves, finishing up with a few stretches so that his muscles weren’t too sore. he stored the footballs on the cart and put away the cones, something that was already routine at that point since he was usually the last one to leave.

finally, rin walked towards you. 

“i’m done,” he said as he approached you on the sideline of the field. his gym bag was right at your side, and he ignored the electricity that sparked his skin when it grazed yours. 

your eyes averted from your laptop to look at him. “oh, hi! thought you’d take a little longer,” you retorted. “anyways, i’m done too.”

he stopped his movement. “what?”

“yeah, i finished the first topic. only fourteen more to go.” the giggle that flew out of your mouth reverberated through his body. rin watched as you stood up and stretched, looking away when your shirt rode up and a sliver of your stomach could be seen. you then proceeded to put your laptop away, and his brows furrowed. 

“i don’t get it. i thought you said… you said it was too much stuff to do by yourself.” you nodded, not even looking at him. rin kind of wished you did. “and yet you did everything?”

“well, yes.”

his scowl only worsened. “what the fuck? why?”

you slung your bag through your shoulder, looking at him with those damn doe-eyes that always sparkled so much. it was annoying. why did they remind him of the stars? and why did rin wanted to watch the night sky on your face?

“you said you have an important game next week, so i figured it wouldn’t kill to do the first topic by myself,” you answered. “don’t get used to it, though! you’re gonna have to help on the next ones, partner.”

the young itoshi ignored the stupid nickname, his brain still trying to catch up to everything. something just wasn’t clicking…

“so why the hell did you wait for me to finish practice?”

you didn’t even falter.

“thought you could use the company.” you shrugged. and although your voice was nonchalant, you were smiling. and not your typical mischievous smirk — it was a sweet, sweet smile, dripped in honey and all things good in the world. 

rin’s heart leaped on his chest. he could feel his cheeks becoming flushed, but he blamed it on the cold. 

coming to think of it, it was really cold. and you sat there for hours… if he looked closely, he could see your frame shivering from the lack of proper clothing. 

a little tsk came out of his mouth, and rin impulsively took off his jacket, throwing it on your face — ignoring the “hey!” you sent his way.

“what’s that for, itoshi?!”

“so that you don’t freeze to death, dumbass.”

rin had to admit your gaping expression was kind of cute. not that he would commit to memory or something… that would be lukewarm, and he was anything but lukewarm. especially when it came to you. 

“don’t get any ideas, though,” he said before you could retort, turning around to follow the path to his dorm room, “i still hate you.”

iii.

things were calmer after the game passed. rin often found himself at the university library with you after his practice, leaving around nine or ten, and walking you to your dorm building simply because he didn’t want to be bothered in case something happened to you. not like he was worried for your safety or anything.

you still got on his nerves, but the project was going surprisingly well. rin learned you were very dedicated and meticulous, meaning you put in a lot of effort to focus and make everything as perfect as it could be. he wished he could say his focus was also as sharp as ever, but the scent of your coconut shampoo always lingered on the study booths and made his mind fuzzy. 

it was tuesday night and you were both on your laptops doing research and writing on your paper, falling into the same little routine you established the past weeks. the library was nearly empty as usual — though you always sat at the furthest cabin because rin didn’t like to see, hear or speak to people — and the only sound in the ambience was the pitter patter of the rain. 

everything seemed to be going fine, but things changed when the rain got heavier and became a strong thunderstorm that made the lights go out.

“fuck,” rin cursed under his breath, looking around to hear other people mumbling complaints and the librarian saying she would turn on the power generator, asking for calm and patience. he squeezed the bridge of his nose, annoyed, and turned to you. “hey, do you think—”

then he stopped. 

the only source of light was the screen of your laptops and the occasional lightning striking on the dark sky, but rin could see you on the other side of the table as clear as day. and he felt his heart squeeze impossibly hard with the sight. 

you were shaking like a leaf, hands squeezed tight and nails prickling your skin, and your eyes were widened and so, so scared. he had never seen you wear such an expression, always familiar with your confidant, cheery self, and he decided he didn’t like one bit. 

“hey,” he whispered, trying to grasp your attention. however, your eyes were focused outside. “hey, look at me.”

slowly, your orbs met his, and rin felt his breath hitch. there were tears on your lash line threatening to fall, and panic began to rise on his throat; but he forced himself to stay calm for your sake. 

“what’s wrong?”

your lips trembled, but nothing came out. he hated your voice, but found himself missing it. so he tried again.

“are you… afraid of the dark?”

his question was answered when the sound of another thunder reverberated again, making you visibly flinch. his gaze softened when a small hiccup left your lips. 

“oh. it’s the thunder.”

you nodded, still unable to talk. rin could see you were forcing yourself to keep your sobs contained, as if the mere thought of crying in front of him was as dangerous as standing at gunpoint. like his words — venomous, harsh, cold words — could hurt you just as much as a bullet. 

his stomach churned with that thought. he hated it. 

so, as carefully as he could so as not to startle you, rin stood up from his seat and walked around the table until he reached the chair at your side, sitting on it. he felt you body tense with the proximity, more so when he slightly turned to stare at you, and felt the need to say something.

“it’s okay,” he murmured, so impossibly soft you could hardly believe it was itoshi rin saying those words to you. 

it was even more unbelievable when he enveloped your body in a hug, bringing your head to his chest as if to shelter you from the thunder. 

rin really hoped you couldn't hear the unrestrained beating of his heart. everything about that moment made him nearly combust; from the ever present smell of your shampoo when he rested his nose in your hair, the evident relaxation of your frame when he hugged you or the small arms that held his waist as if he was the only lifeline in the ocean. 

you let your sobs and sniffles run free, burying yourself deeper in his embrace, and all rin could do was pat your hair and whisper soft reassurances on your ear. 

it’s okay. you are safe. i won’t let it hurt you. 

he didn’t know how long you both stayed in that position, but as he enjoyed the warmth of your body next to his, your sobs eventually died out along with the roaring sound of thunder. the rain became thinner and the lights finally came back, although neither of you made a move to separate. 

the silence lingered for a moment before you broke it, “thank you.”

the male only hummed, trying to hide his disappointment when you slowly backed away. though his hand didn’t leave you, going from your hair to rest on your hip in some type of reassurance squeeze. 

“i-i’m sorry, it’s just…”

“you don’t have to explain,” he interrupted. then, hesitantly added, “only if you want to.”

“it’s not something big or anything… this fear has just kind of been there. i think something happened to me when i was a kid and it was thundering, so every time it happens i just… freeze.” you shook your head. “it’s stupid.”

he frowned. “it’s not stupid if it makes you this terrified. it’s okay, we all have fears.”

you were yet to look him in the eye, seemingly embarrassed about your triggered phobia. “i cried on your shirt.”

“yeah.”

“it has tears stains.”

“yeah.”

you sighed. “i’m sorry.”

he squeezed your hip again. “don’t apologize.”

you finally raised your head to look at him, and rin could very much consider himself a lost man at that moment. your eyes were glistening from the remnant of tears, but that pretty gleam was still there, barging its way through any sadness and any fear to present itself with the shy smile you sent him.

even if it was still dark, he would be able to see it, because you shined. brightly, scorchingly and so, so mesmerizing, like some sort of classic painting worth millions of dollars. if rin had the choice, he wouldn’t want to look away. 

“i think it’s enough for today,” you said, “do you mind if we continue tomorrow?”

“i don’t mind,” rin answered, although he secretly wished to bask in your warmth for a little longer. “i’ll take you to your dorm building. i brought an umbrella.”

because he knew you were a klutz and would most likely forget. not that he paid attention to you or something. 

you smiled again, and rin had to use all of his might to let go of you and go back to his chair to pick up his stuff. silently, you both put away your things and left the study booth towards the exit, where the younger itoshi opened his umbrella and started to walk towards your destination. he felt his skin burning when you tangled your arm with his so that you were squeezed together under the shelter for the rain.

around ten minutes later, you finally arrived at your dorm building. and then, as the little minx you were, you stood on your toes to press a kiss to his cheek before running inside along with your goodbyes. 

“thank you, rin!”

he stood there like a statue for what felt like an eternity, feeling his face impossibly hot. rin touched his cheek in mild disbelief, feeling butterflies erupting on his stomach without permission. 

it was only then he realized you called him by his actual name, and a smile inevitably took over his features. 

fuck.

itoshi rin hated you. but that day, he discovered that he hated seeing you cry even more.

iv.

he didn’t really know what the fuck he was doing there. rin was not the kind of guy who went to parties, much less fraternity ones; but somehow he ended up in one on a saturday night after a lot of convincing from his teammates. he claimed he only accepted so that isagi would shut up and stop pestering him, but the said boy insisted to say he only agreed after learning you would be there. 

which was absurd, of course. a completely crazy, delusional and absurd thought. why would he want your obnoxious self to go and ruin the party? rin hated you. 

right?

the music was loud and the people were even louder. there were dozens of bodies on the makeshift dance floor swaying to the beat, along with some people playing beer pong and small groups scattered around talking as best as they could. rin was part of the last type, although he was tuning out everything that bachira blabbed on his ear like a madman. his focus was solely on the entrance.

and then, you came in. 

it was like a stupid romance movie — the way everything seemed to be in slow motion. from the way you walked, to the slight movement of your hair, to the blink of your curved eyelashes. and god, how much he hated that. 

he hated the way your mere presence prickled his skin. how your voice soothed his lousy thoughts, how your smile lit up the room. he hated this urge inside of him to look for you every time he knew you'd be in the same vicinity, like you were some source of life that he couldn’t live without. 

“are you okay, rin-chan?” bachira’s voice took him out of his thoughts. he blinked a few times.

“yeah, i’m fine.”

now, rin wasn’t a drinker; the red cup on his hand was merely for show. but he gulped some beer at that moment, as if trying to wake up from a hazy dream or get out of a trance. it made sense — he did think you were a siren of some sort. 

there was no other reason for the spell you put on him. 

the party went on, and he spent a few hours avoiding you like the plague and pretending he wasn’t stealing glances at every chance he got. truth is, he was always paying attention when you were swaying your hips on the dance floor like there was no tomorrow, glaring at every guy who thought about getting close while holding back his own desire to do the same.

it was only when you left to the backyard that his teammates finally decided to say something.

“you should talk to her,” reo advised, eyebrows dancing in a weird, wiggly way. rin grimaced.

“what? why?”

the boys rolled their eyes and groaned, tired of the younger itoshi’s behavior. 

“rin, man. you are clearly interested in her. and i’m pretty sure she’s interested in you, too,” isagi said slowly, as if rin was a child. “otherwise, she wouldn’t make the effort to pester you.”

rin could feel his face flushing. “i’m not—”

“don’t even try to deny it. it’s kind of obvious, really,” chigiri butted in, an exasperated countenance on his face. “just go, rin.”

he let out a tsk, chugging the rest of his drink and throwing the cup on the trash. “i’m going out just because i don’t want to keep listening to you idiots.” 

“yeah, right,” nagi snickered, and the others followed, watching rin turn his back and move towards the backyard, where he would inevitably find you. 

the chilly air hit his skin the moment he stepped out, and rin kind of thanked the relief it gave to his hot cheeks. quickly looking around, it was easy to spot your lonely frame leaning on the wall, staring at the stars as if they weren’t in your eyes. he walked to you like his feet had their own will, and once he got close enough, leaned the side of his body on the wall, facing you.

“you’re cold.”

not even a hello, how are you to start. great conversationalist, itoshi rin.

you turned your head to look at him, smiling when recognition took over your features. “hey, itoshi! didn’t think i’d meet you here!”

the giggle that went past your lips was the only reason he didn’t scowl when you didn’t call him rin.

“parties are not really my thing, but my friends convinced me to come.” you nodded, understanding. he blinked a couple of times, and said again, “you’re cold.”

you slightly flushed. “it’s just a bit chilly, but it’s not a big deal…”

but rin was already shrugging off his jacket, moving to be right in front of you as if to shield you from the wind. he handed the piece of clothing to you. “here.”

“oh… thank you,” you answered, bashful, taking the jacket and putting it on. 

last time he lent you one, he didn’t stay to see how you looked like. but at that moment, rin was sure there was nothing prettier than the sight of you in his clothes. he swallowed a nervous lump from his throat.

“so… why are you out here by yourself?”

“needed some air. i danced a lot and it was kind of stuffy in there.” you shrugged. then, fiddling with your fingers, you look straight into his eyes. “and maybe… maybe i was hoping someone would follow.”

someone. you had your eyes on someone. 

rin didn’t know what was worse: the stinging pain on his heart or the bitter taste left on his tongue. what he did know was that both felt like poison, one that would spread through his veins and consume him whole. and that he shouldn’t feel like this. because he hated you, after all. 

he must have made a terrible grimace, because you threw your hands in the air in exasperation. 

“for fucks sake.”

and then your lips were on his. 

it was just a fleeting moment — something way too quick and definitely not enough to sate the dormant hunger inside of him. in the blink of an eye, you were already back in your place, staring at him with doe-eyes and a hundred doubts written in them. 

rin freezed for a whole full minute with his mouth agape, until finally lunging forward to kiss you again. his right arm wrapped possessively around your waist to glue your bodies together, while his left hand found a place in your jaw, cradling your face as if you were some precious jewel. his lips were hungry on yours, and you gasped with the intensity, giving him the opportunity to shove his tongue inside your mouth. 

kissing you was exhilarating, like scoring the perfect goal or winning a championship. adrenaline ran high on his veins and his head was a little airy. and rin swore he never felt so alive. 

when you finally parted, you were both panting, chest heaving with every breath. rin rested his forehead against yours, directing both of his hands to your middle as if to look for grounding. 

“you still hate me, itoshi?” you asked in a whisper, mouth inches away from his but still not close enough. that dangerous gleam was still settled in your eyes, and he could swear you were the perfect definition of sinful every time you batted your eyelashes at him.

“call me rin.”

“okay,” you giggled lightly. “you still hate me, rin?”

he could feel his blood pulsing on his ears. “yeah,” he answered, way too breathless for an athlete of his caliber. 

and then, holding your waist tighter, “kiss me again.”

v.

“we should get coffee.”

rin’s words cut the silence as you were exiting the library yet again. you looked up to see his face staring straight ahead, expression unreadable as always, but the light redness on the tip of his ears told you all you needed to know. 

you decided to be a tease, as always. “hm… i don’t know, should we? you sure you want to spend even more time with someone you hate?”

he scowled like usual, but this time, there was a small pout on his lips. you thought he looked the cutest when he was like that, all shy and trying to maintain his stoic act. 

he grumbled something under his breath. 

“what was that?”

“i said,” he sneered, “i don’t hate you, stupid.”

you arched your brow. “you don’t?”

“do you think i would have kissed you if i did?” the smirk you give him is both charming and infuriating. rin would have said he hated it, but he was done pretending. 

“i don’t know, itoshi. you are kind of emotionally constipated.”

“shut up,” rin quipped. then, he snaked your waist with his right arm as you walked side by side, pulling you closer. “and didn’t i tell you to call me rin?”

there was just mischief in your eyes when you answered, “yeah, but i like to get on your nerves.”

the male scoffed, still in disbelief with your antics. 

“you’re a damn brat. i think you just want me to teach you my name tonight.”

rin could practically feel the heat on your face, and he smirked when he saw how red you were. god, you were so cute. 

“at least take me to dinner first before we hate-fuck,” you still managed to joke, despite the slight shakiness in your voice. he rolled his eyes, and pulled you to a stop by the arm. 

you both stood in the middle of campus, feeling the gentle caress of the breeze and listening to the birds chirping. it was a peaceful day, with the sun high up in the baby blue sky. rin thought there was no better time than at that moment. 

his hand traced your arm until it reached your own, and he squeezed your fingers in reassurance. 

“i don’t hate you,” he said again. “i just hate the way i don’t hate you. not even close. not even a little bit. not even at all.”

he watched your eyes light up and smile brighter than the sun, and he almost laughed at the disbelief in your voice. 

“did you just quote ‘ten things i hate about you’?”

it was his time to flush. a small shrug was all rin answered with — he didn’t want you to know he specifically chose this sentence because that was your favorite movie. not like it mattered when you were gleaming at him and making his heart leap on his chest. 

“well, then,” you squeezed his hand back, “let’s get coffee, rin.”

© 2023 itoshiexx. do not plagarise, translate, or repost any of my work on here or other sites.

BROS THE TYPE OF GUY TO !

sypnosis ; cute things they do in a relationship

characters ; isagi, bachira, chigiri, reo, nagi, rin, sae, shidou, hiori, kurona, kaiser, ness

ISAGI the type of guy to tell his mom about you and ask her for advice.

BACHIRA the type of guy to talk shit about all the people you hate with you.

CHIGIRI the type of guy to use your hair ties and always keep one around his wrist.

REO the type of guy to rent out the place where you guys had your first date to propose.

NAGI the type of guy to purposely lose during games just to see the proud glint in your eyes when you finally beat him.

RIN the type of guy to switch places with you on the sidewalk so that he's facing the road.

SAE the type of guy to put his hand on your thigh while driving.

SHIDOU the type of guy to say "is this dude bothering you?" and proceed to beat up the air.

HIORI the type of guy to carry a polaroid around and hang pictures of the two of you in his room.

KURONA the type of guy to take you on stargazing dates.

KAISER the type of guy to randomly start flirting when he realises he's losing the argument.

NESS the type of guy to move you to the side by holding your waist.

SAE IS SO RRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

=͟͟͞͞ ★ ... ITOSHI SAE : DEVOTION

tags: gn! reader, religious imagery (ish), prince! sae and knight! reader, strong pining, implied relationship (what kind? that’s a secret :3) summary: your loyalties belong to the Itoshi's but mainly the eldest son, and most remarkably, your prince. extra: yoooooo i just wanted to free this from my drafts. this was a draft of my prev fic affections of a prince which IS INSANE because i scrapped this, anyway enjoy reading ppl!

Your knighthood is legendary, you serve the eldest prince of the eastern kingdom. Itoshi Sae is both your rock and your home. He shelters your battleworn figure and sees past the chainmail, the heavy sword and the flush of battle on your face. The prince knows that you are tired, and that you are scared deep down. He calls you home, tells you that not every battle is one you must fight, tells you that he will always stand by you.

You are solely loyal to the Itoshi’s. This is no secret, you wear their livery, you wear armor forged by their smiths. You know the small tilt of Sae’s head from where he stands with his family in court as he looks at you, is a sign of his silent approval. He never tells you outright that he likes it, but you know the lingering gazes and the endearment in his eyes are no illusion.

Sometimes you think that you are devoted to Sae like he is a man made god. That he can be put on altars and celebrated in revered spaces. That your love and loyalty can be equated to pilgrims longing to be with their god, to travel far and wide to serve them wholeheartedly. Ignoring the ache of sore feet and weary hearts missing home, because your home is with Sae, and the pilgrims with their god.

Everytime you are instated elsewhere other than the castle they say the elder prince is caught in his temper. He does not venture out when you are missing from court. A solitary man, your god is, you love him no less for it. You tell him that he cannot keep hiding when you are out, but he insists that there is no use if you cannot be there with him.

Your grip on the reins of your horse weakens at his words.

“Please my prince,” you plead, your armor is heavy but you are used to its weight. 

Prince Sae is beautiful, he has eyes of aquamarine, and he has hair like pink quartz. He has heard this plea from you many times over, he must be tired, but he never relents. A prince is not born to give into the pleas of those around him, he is born with the knowledge that others must give into his wishes.

“You mustn't,” he says, his gaze is fierce and it burns you. “Stay, you are loyal to me, not my father.”

Your horse whinnies, and your frown. A hand of his comes up to touch your cheek, you try and dissuade him, your hand trying to pull his back down and away from your face. His grip is strong and you wriggle like a captured beast under the skin of his palm. Warm and alluring, you feel drawn to the sensation but you are a knight, you serve for the purpose of your prince’s safety.

“I serve the kingdom too,” you say, feeling the soft pad of a finger rub a shape into your cheek. Tracing over a faint scar somewhere along the way as it wanders. Free and unashamed as he feels the figure of your jaw and the apples of your cheeks. 

Prince Sae is stubborn, he always gets what he wants. He pinches you, oh so lightly before huffing. How unbecoming of your prince, but you love him for every oddity in personality. You see something flash in his eyes, the plea to stay with him here, and avoid harm and be of good health.

He has always said that given enough time, when he is king, he will take care of everything for you. No more days spent over horseback and draped in angular armor and thin chainmail. Your time will be spent alongside him, in court, in whatever position you desire. He will keep you closest, that is how dear you are to the eldest prince. 

“The kingdom is my birthright,” Prince Sae fusses, face curdling the longer he has to force you to stay.

You feel around the side of your saddle, there is a small hunting knife tucked into the worn leather. You slip it out and hold it in one hand before presenting it to him. It is sheathed in leather as well, but clearly unlike your saddle, it has rarely been bitten by the elements and is clearly well taken care of.

“Your safety is my oath,” you pull away from him and press the knife into his free hand. “I swear to words older than both of us that I will keep you safe. Let me defend your kingdom, let me defend our home. I swore to rites ancient and redundant, you must always come before me as the prince.”

Your prince is amused, “And what will I do with a knife?”

“Defend yourself,” you say, moving his hand in a way that allows you to close his fingers over the hilt of the dagger.

He chortles, a rare display and one so tempting to dream of over and over again. 

“So be it,” he takes the dagger and turns it over in one hand. “You may go.”

Painstakingly you pull away from him, and he watches you vanish into the distance. The stables behind you shrink and vanish into nothingness. The further you venture on horseback, the smaller and smaller your prince grows. You don’t have it in you to look back, your courage would diminish had you seen the look of yearning in his eyes. 

Knights rarely have any reason to be impeded by their foolishness, there is little room for any doubt if you are that dedicated to your chivalry. But, on occasion, when you are worlds apart from your prince— in the near future, your sovereign, your only king —you feel your heart tremble and sway at the thought of him missing you just as hard as you do on travels and expeditions.

Sometimes, you feel more tied to your prince than you are to the mantra and dogma of your knighthood.

You still feel his hands on your face when night has fallen and when the distance is too great to fathom.

/

If a god can be worshiped anywhere as long as he has his devoted believers then worship can take any place.

You sit beneath the stars, in front of a fire, and you think of Sae. It is hard to think of anything else when you have him, in soul and in heart. Your bond is more than that of a knight and their prince, you feel like dog and master. Seldom can one doubt the loyalty of a dog, when it sleeps at the feet of its master and it waits unyieldingly, there is nothing else it knows but the feeding hand of its master— owner, if intended lovingly.

He is yonder away, but you feel as if he can be felt right beside you. The jut of his jaw and his eyes, the feel of soft skin and his voice like a hymn in your ears. He is vivid in your mind, colors as bright as that of fine silk tunics and dresses, polished gemstones and the shine of gold. He is as valuable as coins and perhaps even more, dare you say he is priceless. 

Maybe this is love, but it feels so lacking to attribute every burning and aching sensation you have ever felt for the prince to just love. It has to be something more, something grand and fitting for his status. Spun of stars and honey and all the wonder you have yet to experience in the universe, you think that sometimes this is more affliction than affection.

You rest your head on a makeshift cushion and you fall asleep.

In dreams he does not evade you either, should you accuse him of the occult and witchcraft, he seems to haunt you. There is nothing unpleasant about it though, you do things of mundane nature and of adventure and bold euphoria that strum you like a well oiled and magnificently crafted instrument. 

Tonight he spirits you away into the ballroom, no longer a knight but a regular individual. A peasant, sometimes royalty, sometimes you are just yourself. A plain knight, but regardless of how you present, he is always pulling you into his arms, his hands cupping your calloused palms and twirling you around. In other dreams, you dip him and you both laugh under the chandelier and candlelight.

“Dance with me?” He says, dressed immaculately and he extends you his hand.

Graciously and more delighted that you possibly can be, you accept and your dream is full of waltzes and other dances he knows. You have never been taught to dance, all your childhood went into shaping you into the perfect soldier, so you sparsely know the steps or when to turn. But your prince is patient, and he teaches you, guiding you and ensuring you don’t step on his feet.

When you wake, you go without any kind of noise and you hope to return sooner.

You yearn to return to where the land is holy and where your god rests. 

/

You return to your quarters after a month. 

Duties of protecting the people and upkeeping the peace is a taxing job. But a rewarding one nonetheless, so despite your exhaustion, you are aglow with joy and gratitude for being able to give aid and protect. You dwell little on your deeds when you enter your room and dispel yourself of your armor.

Each metal piece is taken off with deliberate care. The helmet, the chest piece, the boots and your cuffs. You strip them all and leave them on your worn armor stand. Your absence has left it slightly dusty and noisy when you fit each piece onto it as if you were putting it on yourself.

Once you are freed, you lay on your bed and you fall asleep.

Your dreams are garbled, they lack any kind of direction and you scarcely remember them when you wake. The first thing you register is the fact that you have a blanket thrown over you, and that your prince sits to the side of your lowly bed with a large pink fruit in his hands.

“My prince,” you say, voice hoarse from having woken up and you attempt to stand.

He nods, he passes the fruit into one hand, and the other stops you from standing up. It gently pushes you back to the place you lay and it leaves your skin warm. His touch feels like pure sunlight and it makes you feel aglow with how intimate it feels. In all your time as his knight, you have rarely made yourself seen to him without your armor. To have him touch you, and for his hand to only be separated by a blanket, makes you reel and sputter.

“Good evening,” he greets, scanning you from head to toe before relaxing his expression.

“I am unharmed,” you say, “just tired, my prince.”

Sae begins to break the skin of the fruit slowly, the pulp parts to reveal shiny red pieces. Small and vibrant, he breaks off a few from the white flesh and presses them to your lips. Obediently, though confusedly, you part your mouth and accept.

“This is a pomegranate,” he says, picking some of the red pieces and feeding himself. “And, please, it’s just Sae. Only and always for you, my dear.”

The flavor is unique but you find yourself enjoying it nonetheless.

“Thank you,” you say meekly. “You could have come later, Sae.”

He shrugs, and pulls his chair closer to you. Feeding you more of the pomegranate and beginning to recount any entertaining event that had occurred in your absence. You feel rather endeared by how he allows himself to loosen his personality and shed any kind of appearance he makes. 

It’s oddly intimate, to be fed fruit. To have someone willingly stain their hand with juice and pulp and desecrate the body of a fruit. Pomegranates are sweet yet tart, like fleeting kisses tinged with something unfamiliar. Maybe the desire to stretch the moment so long it eclipses a lifetime.

Sae stays with you until he starts to become sleepy himself, and despite your energy from having fallen asleep earlier, you move to make space in your bed and he lays beside you. Face pressed into the crook of your neck and arms around your waist, it is remarkable how humans fit together, and even more so when you pull him into your arms and play with his hair until his eyes fall shut.

Pilgrims are happiest when they are recognized by their god, happier when they can exist with them. 

Mortal beings are not intended to be found with their god pressed to their side, but perhaps an exception can be made for you. There is some kind of reward for such persevering and sustaining loyalty. 

You look at him where he lays and you can't help but stare.

“One day,” Sae whispers, “I’ll give more than pomegranates.”

“I thought you were asleep,” you laugh softly.

He grunts, inching closer to you despite there being no more space between you.

“You need not, all you are is more than enough for me.”

He smiles, and you return to playing with his hair and admiring him in the lowlight of your room. For as long as you are his knight, he will always be something akin to the divine and you the undying and relentless devotee.

Guys im okayv

Physical Touch

3 times that Hiori Yo learned that your love language was physical touch

Tags: Soccer team manager gn!reader x Hiori Yo, fluff with a splash of angst, pre-blue lock, ~2.5k words

"Can I sit next to you, Hiyori-kun?" You ask, pointing to the bus seat next to him. He raised his head from his phone to look at the only other open seat being next to the teacher/coach. Given that you were probably exhausted after the game, he understood that you wouldn't want to be sitting next to them for the whole trip back to school.

"Go right ahead." He slightly shuffled closer to the window to make you some room.

"Thanks. Good game by the way. We're moving onto the preliminaries because of you." You set your duffle bag under the seats like his before sitting down.

"It's only because of the game plan you came up with, manager."

"You flatter me. I was only creating a strategy that would put you in the best position to score. It was your skill that allowed those to come to life."

"I'm hardly anything special on my own." Though the two of you didn't speak much outside of practice, Hiori had a lot of respect for you as the team's manager. The same goes for you always admiring his skill from the sidelines. But sitting next to him you remind yourself again that he was not the same person he was on the field.

"Is that why you love passing?"

"What?" You shrug.

It was practically your job to watch him. Everything from his one touch ball control to his eyes scanning everyone, he never had any wasted movements. You lost count of how many times his calm demeanor spread to his teammates that received his passes. Not only did he have natural talent, he had the mindset to improve. Staying late to review drills and arriving early to warm up before everyone else. You've always watched from the sidelines.

"I know coach made you our main forward and striker but quite frankly, I think midfielder is more suited for you. The ability to make decisions while assessing the entire field with the high tension- I mean those are useful to be a good forward and put people where needed for you to score but you know Hiori-kun you have a very interesting habit when scoring. Do you know what that is?"

He thinks about it for a second then shakes his head. You turn your body to face him. Pointing a single finger to his eyes. "After you take the shot, you look away from the goal. Almost like you don't care about the results."

You weren't wrong. Winning a point was normal for him. On the off chance that his shot was blocked, it just meant he would have to train harder to make sure it wouldn't happen again. A simple yet somewhat pessimistic view. It wasn't like he had an attachment to soccer.

"So I can expect you to put me as a midfielder next game?"

"It means that you are an absolute monster of a player and I love watching you."

"With your eyes you would be equally good out there." He brushed off the compliment.

You chuckle at his light joke. "No way, I'm more of a watcher than a player. I know I'm partially responsible for the training regime but I really have no idea how you keep up. You must be exhausted all the time."

"If you know then give me more of a break." He sarcastically said. It was just small conversation you guys were having that he was only playing along with the joke.

"Sure!"

"Eh? That easy?" His parents never let him take breaks unless it was for exam season or he was very sick.

He didn't move as you suddenly placed your hand on top of his head. Giving a small rub with a smile. How long had it been since he had been touched? In such a childish way too. The weight of your hand soothing the headache he formed from playing in the blazing sun all day. Your fingers, unknowingly, giving a small massage through his thin blue hair. It felt nice.

"Come on Hiori-kun I'm your soccer team manager, not a dictator. If you want a break you can just say so. Be a bit more selfish."

He almost wanted you to return your hand once you pulled back. His hand flattening his hair back down wasn't the same. "Is it really okay?"

You pull out your clipboard from your bag and shuffled a bit closer to him. Flipping it open you pulled up to next week's training schedule. Taking a pen from the top you wrote 'Hiori Yo on break to rest. Approved by l/n, y/n.'

"See? All done. Enjoy your break. Nice and slow." You tucked your clipboard back into your bag. Still you remained close that he hardly thought you minded that his thighs were touching yours.

"Thanks l/n. I'll... I think I will enjoy it well." He leaned back into the seat at the same time as you. A break. A time to relax. Without soccer. Sounded like a once in a lifetime opportunity for him. He closed his eyes, hearing you giggle as you patted him once more on his head.

-------------

"Hiori-kun! Hiori-kun! Come over here!" You called out from the bleachers. He cracked a smile at you all bundled up in your winter clothes. The sun had barely risen and a particular cold wind kept blowing ove you that it was pure torture to your sniffling nose.

Coming back from his mandatory break, Hiori thought that his body would have become stiff. Instead it was the opposite. He never felt lighter and full of energy. Not only that but with all the time to play hours of computer games, he mentally felt better. Atlas, the time to return eventually came and he had to join everyone else for training. With you leading the team as per usual.

"Yes l/n?"

"Can you give me your hands for a second?" Confused, he held out both of his hands. You took both of them into yours so that his were inside your sleeves. Creating some weird tunnel with both the jackets as you held his hands.

A show of bliss gracing your face. "So warm! As expected of my hardest player."

He realized that you didn't have gloves on despite the cold weather. Relying on his heat radiating off of him to keep warm. He, himself, only having taken them off because he was starting to sweat a lot. "Why aren't you wearing your gloves? Are you using me as a human heater?"

"I couldn't find them this morning and maybe?"

"You could have asked to borrow mine. I should have an extra pair in my bag. Let me grab them."

You pouted. "You can get them in a moment. Let me warm up a little. Please?"

You are so strange. Normally people would only hold hands with people they were close to. Instead you swung your arms like it was nothing.

A squeeze of your hands making him sigh. "Fine. Just for a bit."

"A bit is all I need. But um how was your break? Did you do anything fun? Hang out with your friends or anyone- anything?"

"Not really. Kind of wanted to spend the time alone anyways. Played a lot of video games though. Not that my parents were happy with me skipping practice."

"Oh yeah, coach had to tell me that I had to get permission from them first before I let players go. Your parents are very scary when it comes to your training." Of course Hiori knew his parents called the school. How could he not when they phoned outside his bedroom door the moment he told them?

"What did you tell them that let me stay on break?"

"That I couldn't take it back my word so late. It was rude. Plus a little sprinkle of sweet talking too. Saying stuff like your son is the best on the team, I need to improve the others so they don't hold him back. And oh Hiori-kun is so finely tuned that a small break isn't even going to affect him. It's because he has such wonderful parents watching over him. Things like that."

That would explain why they were so lax with him during the week. He just thought they were playing the image for his sake. Turns out it was your influence that allowed him to leave soccer for a short time. Some team manager you were for letting your best player go.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that for me."

"It was no trouble. For you, that was nothing."

"Are you like this with everyone?"

"Only with you." You feel his hands twitch in surprise. You tucked yourself further into your jacket's collar. "You're really really warm and nice. Only for you, Hiori-kun."

Releasing him, you put your hands back in your pockets. "I should let you get back to training before anyone thinks I'm playing favourites. You had a whole week of rest; get back out there solider!"

He finally noticed how close the two of you were. His toes touching yours. He awkwardly cleared his throat with a cough. A blush warming his rosy cheeks. Taking a step back he quickly caught that you were equally flustered over given how you kept glancing elsewhere but him. Your jacket collar hiding the bottom half of your face to not let him see you holding back your smile.

"One second." He went over to his bag, quickly returning with his extra pair of gloves. You had forgotten about that offer as you were very distracted. Still you took it.

Slipping them on you chuckled at how rough they were. They were nothing like your normal pair of fuzzy winter gloves. Still, you liked how the two of you were going to be matching. Not that you would say that outloud.

"Thank you Hiori-kun!"

"You're welcome. Next time remember to have your gloves or ask me. Don't just sit here in the cold. It's not healthy."

"Yes yes I'll bother you every time I'm freezing. I should take a break from all these morning practices. Watch from a distance. Somewhere where I'm not getting frostbite."

"Then I wouldn't get to use the excuse of having me as a human heater to stop training."

"I can still be cold inside." You mumble out after he started jogging back to the rest of the team. You look down at his gloves. It wasn't the same as Hiori himself. You'll just have to make do with this.

_____________

Your heart pounded against your chest. Hiori noticing your hands shaking as you took the paper from him. As much as he wanted to hold them to calm you down, his only thought was to tell you the truth first. "I'm resigning from the soccer team. Starting next week."

You bit down on the inside of your lip. Forcing yourself to take the resignation letter. "Can I... can I ask why?"

"I was accepted into a special soccer program. My parents think it'll be good to further my career. You know, focus myself on honing my skills. To join though I have to leave school to live in their dorms."

"Is that so? Wow. What- that sounds like a great opportunity. And you're already so good. It's going to be- I don't know how you can even get better." The letter crumpled from your fingers harshly holding them.

"L/n-"

"I accept your resignation letter. And I wish you the best. Try not to forget me when you become famous." You hoped he didn't notice that how fast you were blinking back your tears. Nor the wavering in your voice.

Unfortunately, Hiori did. As much as he wanted to use Blue Lock as an excuse to escape his parents for some time, he knew that it would seperate the two of you. Just as you were starting to get closer as well. He knew that you would support him that he had to take on the offer.

"Thank you." He bowed his head.

"Can I ask you something before you go though?"

"Of course." Your fingers lightly touched his chin to raise his head.

"You developed a new habit when you shoot at the goal. Do you know what is?"

Before it was that his eyes adverted the goal. He had close to zero memories of the ball going into the net. He remembered focusing on the flatten grass. That the other team showed signs of defeat before it even went in. How tired he was. But now he has new memories of shooting goals.

It was of you on the sidelines. The way your eyes would shine with pride of his work. Your screams cheering his point on regardless of the result. The thumbs up always directed for him with the widest grin spreading on your face. He couldn't care less about the point. Hiyori just liked watching you.

"I look at you after a shot." Your arms wrapped around him. Holding him as tightly as you could. Burying your face into his shoulder to hide the tears you could no longer hold back.

"Then- then when you're there- I won't be there to- to- for you to see! And- and you're going to overwork yourself! And you're going to lose your gloves and you won't have an extra pair because I took them and you're too nice that the other players might be mean and-and-"

He soothingly patted you on the back. Taking in the last few moment he could have with you in his arms. Despite him being the athlete, you had an insane hold on him. Gripping the back of his shirt to pull him closer. It made him feel protected. Cared for.

Blue lock couldn't offer him head rubs or pats on the head the same as you can. Holding his hands on the excuse of warming up was probably a joke to whatever monsters were in there. And a hug goodbye that told him he was loved was unquestionable. He didn't want to let you go.

"I'm not giving your gloves back." You muttered into his shoulder.

"That's okay."

"I want a hug when you get out." He pulled his head back causing you to do the same. His light blue eyes meeting your puffy eyes. One of his hands caressing your cheek to wipe the dried tears.

Gently, his other hand that somehow landed behind your neck pulled you forward. Letting his lips land on your forehead. Finally all the tension from your hug leaving your body. Letting the two of fully relax.

"I'll give you a lot more than a hug when I get back." You buried your face into his chest once more to hide your embarrassment very apparent on your face.

"I take it back you're a big meanie, Hiori-kun." You could feel his chest rumble with his laugh.

Though the time that you two had spent together was limited, you made each moment last. Holding one another in small ways to remind each that they were still there. Encouraging the other to continue on even without being physically in person.