Itoshi Sae X Y/n - Tumblr Posts

do stars return?

itoshi sae x reader

summary: your childhood friend leaves, and you question if he’ll ever come back.

notes: [1.2k words.] i like to think this man has super angst potential but that won’t be unearthed today LOL no beta we die like men <3

disclaimers: childhood friends trope, angst (if u squint) to fluff, making out for a lil bit, poetic dialogue, forgiveness theme.

masterlist.

Itoshi Sae shines.

It's a truth you've come to realise at the budding age of seven. He, with his tepid stature and equally cold attitude, is destined for greatness.

A star, you whisper, once upon a time. A time where he lived without a million eyes watching his every move. You will become a star, I just know it. 

And back in the day, it wasn't just you who believed it. Everyone did. From his teachers to his classmates, to his parents and his brother. It was an indisputable fact that the boy who dedicated himself wholly to soccer, a prodigy who made the sport look like an art form, had his future set out for stardom.

So it is no surprise to anyone when your naive declaration comes into fruition.

His face is plastered on every billboard - as far as the eye can see. Japan's pride, he is known as. The Ice Prince; he who dominates the field; a force to be reckoned with.

Itoshi Sae: the star.

You are proud. No doubt. Though, it’s false to say that you aren’t envious. Sae is a trailblazer: one that surpasses all of his enemies with a nonchalant stare, and transcends into the sky with the other geniuses. He is a part of the lucky few who are destined to be gazed upon with awe. Everything and anything you have achieved pales in comparison.

(You’d surely hear reprimands if you voice those thoughts out loud, though. In your time, you have made a name for yourself. An expert in your passion at the mere age of seventeen; a trailblazer in your own right.

…It’ll just never compare to the name Sae built for himself, you think with finality.)

But above the awe and envy you feel whenever Sae’s name comes up, is love.

Love: a trap that is inevitable for a childhood friend of his. A pitfall that you have fell into. Your love for him is a bittersweet fact, one which tugs at your heartstrings whenever his face shows up on your phone. Sweet, because childhood love is a beautiful, rare thing - you’re glad that it has happened, in all honesty - though bitter all the same, because he is a star.

And stars shoot past. They never go back.

(He, will never go back.)

So for the years that Sae is gone, you float by on that knowledge. Merely acknowledging him as the one who crashed into your life, and left as turbulently as he came. You work diligently to mute the love that festered in your heart, knowing it will never be. 

You wholeheartedly believe that your life will continue in this fashion.

Then, the impossible happens.

The star returns, seven years later. On your doorstep, nonetheless.

"Itoshi?" 

Somehow, even in the ungodly hour of 12:56AM, Sae manages to look as beautiful as the day he left. It's unfair. Unfair for him to show up at your doorstep unannounced; unfair for him to have grown into his boyish looks as gracefully as he did.

It’s unfair for him to still make your heart race, even after all this time.

"Who else would it be?" He scoffs, the bite of his words not quite reaching his eyes. "And, Itoshi, seriously?"

His voice makes your heart leap. It's like you are ten again. "Well… You haven't been Sae for a while now," you say. "Not since you ghosted me, anyways."

Sae's eyes flicker with an emotion you thought he is incapable of feeling. "I didn't mean to." Regret. The Ice Prince is feeling regret, all for you. And if you were ten again, maybe that alone would shake you. But you aren't. You are several years wiser. You know better.

"It's fine if you want to be the best in the world. I don't blame you for that - not at all. But you can be number one and not neglect the ones that love you, y'know?" You slowly retreat back into the comfort of your apartment, hand creeping onto the back of the door. "Goodnight, Itoshi. You should go home; it's late."

You push the door, preparing to end the conversation then and there.

It’s not supposed to be like this, you realise. He, your first love, is supposed to stay in the past. Itoshi Sae should not be at your doorstep past midnight, suitcase in tow, as if he came straight from the airport to your house. The feelings you hold for him should be locked up within the depths of your heart - not surging in full force from just the sight of him.

But alas, fate plays its mischievous tricks once again. And Sae is not the type of person who lets blunders get away scot-free.

"…You love me?” He says, barely above a whisper, foot wedged between the door and the entrance. An impenetrable silence follows from your end. 

Seven years older, but still a fool in the face of love, it seems.

“I did,” I still do, your mind yells. “But you’re a star now, Sae. Just like I said you would be.” Your breath hitches, nails forming crescent-shaped indents within your palm. “…And stars don’t fall in love with the big, black sea of nothingness, do they?”

A beat of silence ensues from his end. You cringe at your own word choice. Maybe he left, you think. Great. Itoshi Sae was at your door, and you scared him away with your stupid love and even stupider confession. How stupid can you even get—

The door hinge creaks as you topple over, shattering your inner turmoil. Sae announces his intrusion with a loud sigh.

“Hey! What are you?— This is considered trespassing—“ You begin. Sae shuts you up with a forceful kiss, pinning you against the door that you were hiding behind minutes before. It’s messy, tantalising, addicting. The smell of his aquatic cologne fills your senses, and he cups your face in between his hands. He feels so warm. He feels like home.

Sae’s whole body screams of need. The need for you; the need to make up for the lost time. 

You hate how you are so weak for him. 

“Idiot.” He deadpans as the two of you part. “If you’re going to get all poetic on me, fine. Stars don’t fall in love with the galaxy.” 

You remove yourself from his arms, eyes scrunching in offence. Bold thing for him to say, especially after he just kissed your lips raw. “So… You’re not in love with me?”

“Let me finish.” Sae is quick to pull you back into his embrace, voice impossibly soft for the otherwise stone-faced boy. “Stars don’t fall in love with the sky. They live in it; I live with you.”

Sae hopes that the implication is clear.

You, alone, are his hope; you are the reason he sparkles as much as he does. Even while you were miles apart, his childhood friend was the sole thing on his mind. A star cannot shine without its galaxy, after all.

“You’re not off the hook, by the way.” You breathe lightly, laying your head against his chest. “Seven years is still a long time. I don’t think you can cuddle your way out of this one, Itoshi.”

A small smile elicits from his face, “I can try, can’t I?”

…And this star is willing to wait for his galaxy to forgive him, no matter how long it takes.

— lost to time ft. sae itoshi

— warnings: angst, character death, slight ooc?

— author's note: a reupload of my favorite work on sae while i finish editing the next 2 chapters of my hazbin series. enjoy!

— first recording

“hi sae! i heard from rin that you’ll be leaving for spain. i’m really sorry i couldn’t come to see you off, i’ve been busy studying, you know, for exams and stuff. but that’s beside the point! i wish you all the best sae! do your best and when you come back home, you better be the world’s best striker yeah? don’t worry, everything will pass by quickly so don’t miss me too much ok?”

sae hated planes. he hated them quite a lot. in was a constant reminder of that time when he was only 14, leaving home to go to spain to live out his dreams only for it to be crushed 4 years later. sae hated the airport, it was always so busy and so stuffy and so cramped. he hated the feeling of being surrounded by unfamiliar strangers, hated the feeling of people brushing up against him even if they didn’t really mean it. sae hated winter. it was the season he severed his bond with his precious little brother after all. it was the season he turned his back on him and it was the season he had wished to never relive again.

-

— second recording

“hey hey guess who’s sending you another voice message? it’s me obviously, why didn’t you tell me you were back already?! if you did i would’ve picked you up from the airport!

……

is something the matter sae? you haven’t picked up any of your parents’ calls and their really worried about you. you can always talk to me remember? i’ll always be here to listen, ok? don’t bottle everything up, it’ll do more bad than good. well, i have to go now. talk with your parents every once in a while will you? ever since you left for spain you’ve pretty much cut off all contact, even with me. that’s all, good night sae.”

sae didn’t really like flowers. he thought they were a hassle. plants that require specific needs and if not met, they’ll wilt. sae was never fond of them but here he was, standing in front of the counter of a local flower shop as the elderly shopkeeper wrapped a bouquet – filled with carnations, gardenias, lilies, roses, and chrysanthemums. 

everything passes.

— college; third recordings

“i got into my dream college sae! can you believe that! honestly, i was really nervous when i took the entrance exams, but thankfully i studied real hard and managed to pass! i’ll be moving into the dorms soon. i’m gonna miss home. oh and rin! i heard he got into a soccer program recently, isn’t that nice! he’s following your footsteps in becoming the best striker in the world. i know, i know, you aren’t a striker anymore but it’s still nice to know that you’re still into soccer at least. by the way, when will you come back home? i kind of miss you, you know. i never got to see you off and when you did come back i was out of town and really busy. what about we plan a meetup or something in the near future? you know, make up for the times we lost? oh, i have to go now! my parents are helping me move in to my dorm. catch you later sae!”

sae didn’t really like coming home. the house he grew up in for the first 14 years of his life felt too foreign to be called home anymore. his parents felt like distant strangers that he just met a couple weeks ago – they felt more like acquaintances than his mother and father. the photos framed around his home felt like ancient relics from thousands of years ago, he didn’t recognize them. sae didn’t recognize himself. 

maybe he spent too much time in spain to the point where it felt more like home. how ironic, he began to realize. he had flown back to japan to escape from his hell that was spain but here he was, in his home, in the bedroom he used to sleep in for endless nights, wanting to go back to the place that left his heart hollow.

“there’s nothing else i could do.” he tried to convince himself as he sat down on his childhood bed, the bouquet of flowers at his side. he could only sigh and let himself fall back into the bed of his long gone home. “everything passes.”

“hey hey hey it’s me again! how have you been sae? i’d like to think that i’ve adjusted pretty well in college. made a few new friends and met some old ones. honestly, i almost didn’t recognize them! i mean, do you remember makoto from middle school. he was a such a problem child back then and now look at him! he’s a scholar now! i guess everyone just starts to become more mature after hitting 18, who knows. thank you again, for the gift. i was definitely shocked when my roommate told me i had a package from you. i can’t believe you still remember that i wanted ‘no longer human’! thank you, i’ll be sure to treasure it. well, that’s all for today. call you some other time sae!”

everything passes.

-

— drunk recordings; the words i wish i could’ve told you sooner

“how do you work this again? ah got it! hehe, hi again sae! i’m at a party right now, man maybe you were right, i do have shit alcohol tolerance. but it’s fine. don’t worry, i’m already on my way home and the driver isn’t some creepy dude that might kill me.

……

you know, i like you very much but i don’t think you’ll believe me. i know i jokingly said that we should marry each other if we aren’t dating someone if we hit our 30s, but i kinda wanna marry you even if we aren’t 30 yet. is that weird? i really miss you. please come home.”

……

“hello? god that was so embarrassing… sorry, could you just forget about what i said in the last recording? um just, gosh i don’t even know. denying it won’t really help right haha… it’s in the past now so don’t mull over too much ok? please, just disregard that last recording. i’m really sorry, it was just me being drunk.”

sae did not in fact disregard that recording. in fact, sometimes in the dead of night he’d think about it and wonder, if he had replied to that specific recording would things have ended differently? 

sae didn’t like deep and evoking questions about ‘what if’s’, he finds them annoying most of the time. and yet here he was now entertaining the idea. bouquet in hand as he casually walked around the neighborhood that the both of you had grew up in. the same twists and turns, same houses, same playground, same everything.

yet the silence was too loud, even for him.

everything passes.

-

— graduation recordings

“well, i think it’s safe to say i survived. i graduated sae, are you proud? man i still can’t believe i was a few point from getting the valedictorian spot but oh well. alls well that ends well i suppose. i heard you won your recent match congratulations mr best midfielder! kinda wish i was there to see it, but don’t worry! in your next match i’ll definitely save up enough money and buy those tickets to spain and your match one day! just you wait, i’ll be the screaming my lungs out and support you, i’m still your number one fan after all!”

sae had some feelings of dissatisfaction when you did not in fact get those tickets to spain and his match. maybe it was his wishful thinking but he really did wish you were there. but he knew it was impossible. 

he remembered the feeling of anger and frustration running through his veins, cursing the heavens above because he felt the need to show the gods his emotions. sae hated thinking about you in that moment. he hated how he felt like he was in a new version of hell whenever you just happened to cross his mind. sae hated you very much.

everything passes.

-

— recordings from 2 years ago

“i’m sorry. i know you should’ve heard it from me but i guess my family beat me to it haha. to be perfectly honest with you sae, i had no plans of telling you. i’m sorry. its just, the thought of breaking the news to you. how could i ever do that to you? i’m sorry. god i’m so sorry sae.”

……

“hey. i received the gift you sent me. you didn’t have to , you know. now i kinda feel bad about having you go on break in the middle of soccer season because of me. but still, thank you. i appreciated you being here, with me. it was a refreshing feeling, talking to you again and just hanging out. work has been really stuffy and felt like i was being caged but you came. you suddenly appeared and suddenly everything was alright again. i know we only said goodbye a couple minutes ago but, i miss you already. sorry. this sounds really weird doesn’t it? anyways, thank you again for the gift. i’ll be sure to wear it everyday. that’s all, have a good night sae.”

……

“hey. sorry for calling at such an odd time. i just. i just felt a little lonely. i sound so stupid i’m sorry. good night sae.”

……

“makoto dropped by today. god he was as annoying as ever but he really cheered me up. he managed to confess to this girl he’s pining over since sophomore year. i’m happy for him. but it really got me thinking about us. i know i told you to forget about that one recording because i was drunk but now that i look back on it, i wasn’t really honest. to you and myself. i know this may be the worst timing to confess but yeah, i like you very much. since primary school, as cliche as it may sound i think it all started when you stood up for me from those bullies. now that i think about, i practically glued myself to your side ever since that day didn’t i? i’m glad you didn’t really mind that. i remember always using homework as an excuse to always have you hang out with me even though i completely understood the lesson. man, where did i get the confidence to do that stuff? but i guess those times are lost in the sands of the past i guess. oh right, sorry, i forgot you didn’t really like those type of stuff. getting all deep and whatnot. well that’s all, i’m getting pretty tired already so i’ll head to bed. good night sae.”

everything passes.

-

— present

“hi. thank you by the way. i don’t know, i just don’t think i’ve ever said that you recently. so, thank you. its a bit funny isn’t it? i would almost always talk your ear off every recording but this time, i can’t even find the words to say. my parents came over, talked to them a bit. rin visited as well. he’s gotten a lot taller than i last saw him, he’s probably taller than you now!

……

sae, thank you. for everything. i’m glad we stayed in touch. i’m glad we stayed as friends.  thank you for making my days seem just a tad bit brighter, though sometimes i wonder what it would be like if we were, you know, dating. wonder what the difference would be. i mean we’d still talk to each other right? maybe holding hands and kisses but that’s pretty much it right? but thinking about it is useless right now. maybe in an alternate universe were actually married and adopted a cat like how we used to talk about.”

“you know, before this very moment. i accepted my fate already. i was content, i was doing fine but now. sae, i don’t want to die.”

“please remember me ok? and i’ll be sure to remember you. i’ll see you again, sae.”

“nii-chan..”

sae could only put his phone back in his pocket. his younger brother standing a good distance away from him. he could only imagine how rin looked like right now. was he pitying him, grieving with him? he’ll never know because he will never turn to look at him. not when your right in front of him.

how many times had he played all your recordings for the past 2 years? maybe a little over a 100 times? maybe close to 200 now?

sae removed all those thoughts as he placed the bouquet on the ground, the wind seemed to answer to his call – you seemed to answer to his call. despite all the pain, all the misery, all the bitter waves of grief that flooded his being whenever he played your recordings, he couldn’t bring himself to stop. he didn’t want to forget what you sounded like. your voice reminded him too much of home.

“happy birthday you idiot.” he said to you, keeping his hands in his pockets, watching the leaves of the flowers in the bouquet sway with the wind. two pieces of paper underneath it threatened to be blown away. “you said you wanted to come visit me and watch my match, well now you can.” two pieces of paper, one a plane ticket to spain the other a ticket to his upcoming match two weeks from now. “you better come watch me alright?” he could only bitterly smile. 

“you’re 30 now,” he whispered, before getting on one knee. placing a velvet box in front of your gravestone. “you should’ve waited for me, you idiot.” sae could only mutter those words to no one in particular. it was as if the world had stopped for a moment, the wind had stopped howling, the sun was nowhere to be seen. he could only see you. “i wanted to marry you too, y’know.”

sae could remember every occurrence where he would sit at his balcony in spain every night after your passing. phone to his ear, listening to all your recordings. but you’ll never know how he replies to them, every single one of them with his own. 

“i told the stars about you and what we could’ve had.” he chuckled, “you’re by far the hardest lesson i had to learn.”

standing up from his kneeling position, he gave you one last look before walking away. rin followed suit, but not before placing something at your grave. a pink book that you had loved till the very end. 

sae hated planes, but he flew back to japan every year. sae didn’t really like flowers, but every year he’d get you a pretty bouquet. sae didn’t like coming home but if it meant getting to visit you, he’d come back over and over again. sae didn’t like reading or any deep and evoking questions but he always humored you whenever you asked him.

sae hated all those things but they reminded him too much of you to let them go. 

and just like your favorite author, when osamu dazai asked to die, he simplu agreed; but just before his death, he suddenly felt obsession with life.

everything passes. just like how you’ll eventually get lost in the sands of time.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

I miss the person i was 6.9k words ago

𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒, 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : 𝐀 𝐬𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐭𝐨 ‘𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬, 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭.’ 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝟐

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨, 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮 𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐒𝐚𝐞

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐜 : 𝟔.𝟗𝐤

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 : 𝐔𝐧𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝; 𝐢𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐂𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 : 𝐍𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬

୨⍣୧｡ (𝐀/𝐍) : 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠. 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐝!

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 : 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐚𝐞'𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭, 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥 : 𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐝.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤. 

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬, 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐬 : @𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬-𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲.

𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨

'Miffy.’

'Hm?’ 'Sweet little bunny.’ 'Miffy.’

’ ‘S that?' 

'Miffy, miffy, miffy, run!’ you exclaimed, pouncing on Nagi, fingers set to work as you tickled his sides, making him squirm. That was probably the most beautiful laugh you had ever heard, his voice echoing through the walls of your shared bedroom after his nap. 

A memory that seemed so long ago. 

Keep reading

words i want to say

synopsis: four times itoshi sae wanted to tell you he loved you, and the one time he finally did.

pairing: itoshi sae x gn!reader | words: 1.6k | warnings: established relationship, fluff

notes: why hello! i'm back with this 4+1 prompt that i absolutely love, i wrote this in like an hour so this is definitely not proofread lol and istg i'm writing the kiss prompts so bear with me :((

masterlist

i. 

it was a game like any other. at a certain point in his life, sae didn’t really felt a huge thrill by entering a stadium, already knowing he would win easily and beautifully destroy his enemies. this time, however, there was electricity dancing through his veins and prickling under his skin — and it was all because of you, who was sitting in the stands, wearing his jersey, for the first time.

and sure, he could swear such a thing did not affect him at all; he was the itoshi sae, after all, and anyone would die to wear his original jersey at one of his games. 

but you weren’t just anyone. you were his partner of three months, and everything about your relationship was still fairly new, and for the first time in forever, sae really, really didn’t want to mess this up. 

you were beautiful, sitting prettily in the special section of the crowd, reserved for family, partners and very rich people. sae could distinguish your smile from miles away, because it shined like nothing he had ever seen. he felt his heart beating faster, and it was not from all the running around the field.

as expected, his team won, with sae scoring a gorgeous final goal that made everyone jump in the stands. though, he didn’t care about the pats in the back from his teammates, the thumbs up from his coach or the shrilling screams of the crowd — all he could focus was on you, hugging his neck and beaming like the sun. 

“you were amazing, sae!”

it was fucking early. he knew it. 

but as he hugged you back and buried his nose in your hair, the words i love you flew through his mind. 

ii.

“this is stupid.”

you giggled at his words. this sound always sounded more like a melody to sae, but he would rather die than admit that. instead, he just glared at you, sitting right beside him at a stupid photobooth. 

“c’mon, baby, it’s gonna be fun!” you said, completely unaware of how the word baby did bad things to his heart. he wasn’t brave enough to call you pet names yet, but you were always more outgoing than he was. 

“don’t wanna.”

“please?” you pouted, your eyes becoming googly like a puppy. he could only mouth a tsk, knowing he couldn’t say no to you even if he tried (he didn’t).

“fine. just do it already.”

you happily bent your body forward to click at the screen, starting the countdown for the pictures. then, returning to your place by his side, you lay your head on his shoulder and smiled for the first picture. sae did a simple peace sign, face still stoic as ever.

on the second pic, you waited until the last second to do fishy lips and cross your eyes, and that caused sae to snicker, which was fortunately caught by the camera. happy by that, you laced your arms around his neck, squishing your cheeks together in a cute pose for the third picture.

on the fourth and last one, you separated slightly, looking sae straight in the eyes with that sparkle that made his stomach churn. 

you smiled, and he kind of stood there, dumbfounded, barely listening to the click of the photobooth. an i love you was the only thing he could hear.

iii. 

seven months in and sae thought he had already seen all of you. despite his busy schedule, you saw each other quite frequently because of your flexible job, meaning you could travel along in his trips around the globe. he was used to your soothing presence and he loved every second of it.

but this — this was something that he wasn’t used to. 

he hated to attend gala parties just to appease sponsors and snobby people, but he had agreed for the first time because you said you wanted to see how it was, and that it would be good for his career. you were always so thoughtful, and that never failed to make his chest fuzzy. but he did not expect to almost have a cardiac arrest seeing you all dressed up. 

“do i look good?” you asked, bashful and uncertain. he wanted to scream. good wasn’t even close to what you were. you were perfect, divine, an angel on earth. 

you were everything he needed. 

“you look beautiful, baby,” he said, smiling ever so slightly in hopes of convincing you of the purest truth. his hands found home on your hips, and he gave you a little peck. 

“thank you.” you smiled. “you look very handsome, too.”

then, you proceeded to fix his tie like it was already muscle memory, despite it being the first time either of you did this. you smiled again, sweetly, once you finished.

“all done. you’re good to go, mr. itoshi.”

the domesticity hit him like a truck. a lump formed in his throat, and it tasted a lot like i love you.

iv.

the beach was his favorite place in the world. being around the calmness of the sea always brought him peace, much like when he was with you. so combining both of his favorites was a bonus sae couldn’t deny. 

the sand was warm and soft beneath his feet, and he sat on top of a towel, observing you standing nearer the ocean. the wind blew in your hair, and he could hear you laughing and squealing every time you tried to feed a seagull and they ran after you and your food.

“sae! help me, baby, they’re gonna kill me!”

“you can do it.”

“what if i can’t?!”

“i’ll cry at your funeral, don’t worry,” he answered simply, snorting when you gasped in pure offense. 

when you finally got tired of running around, you sat next to him, panting a little. though you didn’t stay put for long — you never could. you grabbed a stick and started to draw on the sand, doing little shapes and words. 

sae could only watch, mesmerized, as the orange hue casted a heavenly glow around your frame, almost like a halo. it complimented your skin perfectly, and he cursed himself for not having the guts to take a picture so that he could remember this moment forever. he wasn’t sappy, after all.

he casted his eyes down, only then realizing you drew the letters ILY inside a heart, looking at him with a fond gaze he didn’t deserve. 

i love you, too, was what he wanted to say. but itoshi sae was never good with words, so his hand reached for yours and he gave it a little squeeze, before bringing your knuckles to his lips in a tender kiss. with the way the corners of your eyes crinkled, he knew you understood. 

and he loved you even more for it.

v.

you worked a lot. despite your adjustable routine, you often had to bring your laptop everywhere, just in case your boss needed something more immediate. in sae's penthouse, it was no different, and that specific day happened to be one of those urgent matters. 

sae was grumpy. he wanted your attention for a while, but he would never stoop so low as to ask for cuddles, so he just sat by your side on the couch with his arms crossed. you’d say he was pouting, but that was absurd. itoshi sae didn’t pout. 

you were pretty, he thought, all focused and dedicated like that. you were like a painting that sae could spend a lifetime admiring, without ever getting tired. the slight furrow of your eyebrows, the curve of your nose, the crease of your mouth… oh, he got distracted. you were now facing him and saying something he didn’t catch. 

“what was that?”

“i said, let’s go.”

he grimaced, confusion etched in his face. “where are we going? i thought you had urgent work.”

“to bed, baby. it’s your nap time, isn’t it? i can finish this later. i know you sleep better with me in your arms.”

you grinned in a smug kind of way, but sae could barely register anything besides the three magical words that were hammering inside his heart, coming up to his tongue until all he could do was say…

“i love you.”

fuck, he thought. now the cat is out of the bag. he fucking loves you. 

your eyes widened slightly, as if you weren’t expecting such a declaration, but your expression softened and your hand came up to cup his jaw. your thumb did a small caress at his cheekbones, and sae felt goosebumps rising up his skin.

“i love you,” he said again, because now that the dam had broken, nothing could stop that phrase from flowing. “i love you so much.”

your smile could rival the sun and light up any darkness. he loved you like this. he loved you in all your ways.

“i love you, too,” you answered, all soft and giddy, and sae finally released the breath he didn't even realize he was holding. “so much.”

his hand came to meet with yours, and he interlaced your fingers, standing up and pulling you along. you stumbled a bit, but he steadied you by gripping your waist, as if scared you would let go. his lips met yours almost urgently, but they were still soft nonetheless — because with you, sae knew to be soft, to be gentle. it’s what you deserved, after all. 

when you parted, lips swollen and a little breathless, he showed you one of his rare smiles; the ones that always came easier when you were in the picture. you felt butterflies swirling in your stomach watching itoshi sae beam to you. because he loved you.

your fingers interlaced again, and he started to drag you towards the bedroom, ready for his 3pm nap.

“you’re right, by the way,” he confessed, and you looked at him, puzzled. “i do sleep better with you in my arms.”

© 2023 itoshiexx. do not plagarise, translate, or repost any of my work on here or other sites.

US, AGAIN .ೃ࿐

pairing. itoshi sae x gn!reader

genre. second chance (exes back to lovers!) | a bit of small town romance | a sprinkle of childhood friends to lovers (past) | angst with a happy ending 

content/warnings. 5.2k+ wc | characters are aged 25 in the present | pro-athlete!sae x coffee shop owner!reader | sae left for spain at 19 in here | mentions of sae’s vague past (especially the striker dream) | itoshi bros conflict never happened here let me be delusional | heavy in narration | minimal proofread

in which: itoshi sae returns to the only place on earth he vows to never set foot again.

💭 flashbacks are italicized and indented :>

Six years.

In those six long years of his absence, you couldn't deny that you rehearsed countless scenarios of encountering him upon his return. 

If by chance he still wanted to see you, or even look at you, you imagined giving him a small smile, a carefully crafted facade of composure, before gracefully walking away, as if life had moved on effortlessly for both of you.

That’s what you imagined. Just walk away, like how life went on for the both of you. 

But reality never seemed to align with your reveries. The sight of him wasn't remotely serene enough to prompt a composed exit. Seeing him made your throat tighten, and your heart danced in a rhythm only he could create.

Six damn years had passed since you last saw him on that balcony, and now, with him back in town, avoiding him seemed like the only right thing to do.

You don’t know how long he’ll be here, but it is now your life mission to avoid him at all cost. Today's encounter was just an unfortunate event—an inevitable twist of fate. Their house was literally right in front of your family's, making it hard to escape the nearness of the past.

“So, he’s back in town?” 

Hari's voice, your co-worker and now a dear friend, snapped you back from the reverie of yesterday's memories. The sound of her voice broke through the nostalgic haze, pulling you back to the present.

“What?”

“I asked if your childhood friend who is also a superstar slash professional athlete slash your only ex is back,” she mischievously asked, even miming quotation marks to emphasize each title she created.

You chuckled softly, shaking your head at her antics. Your gaze drifted to the freshly baked pastries, their delightful aroma greeting your senses like a warm embrace as you artfully displayed them on the shelves. The familiar scent of coffee and delightful confections used to calm you, but now it mingled with the storm of emotions inside.

“Yeah, it's basically the talk of the town. He's famous after all,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and still focused on your work, using it as a shield to hide your vulnerability.

But in reality, the sight of him earlier had caught you off guard, and you had turned the other way to avoid him. Your heart was still racing from the almost encounter, and the comforting ambiance of your coffee shop provided little solace.

“Did he see you?”

“I pray to all saints that he didn’t,” you deadpanned, your facade of composure beginning to falter.

“What did he look like now?”

You hesitated, your mind flashing back to that fleeting glimpse of him earlier.

Far from what was once mine. “Good.”

“That’s it? Good?”

No. He looked gorgeous. He looked painfully gorgeous.

“What do you want me to say?” you countered, throwing a side glance to her persistence.

In that fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of how much he had changed. He looked undeniably handsome, lean, and with a certain maturity that hadn't been there before.

He… looked different.

And that's good—for you and for him. It meant that life there treated him well, and it eased some of the lingering guilt you carried.

You and Hari fell into a consuming silence, your backs turned away from each other. Even with closed eyes, you sensed that she wanted to ask something. You didn't want to initiate the conversation, but this suffocating silence had to go.

As you stepped behind the counter, you were met with Hari's concerned eyes and a voice laden with hesitation. “What are you going to do then?” she carefully asked.

You pressed your lips together, momentarily at a loss for words.

So you did what you do best: mask hurting with laughter.

“Is there anything I should do?” you paused, the sound of your fake laughter ringing in your ears. “It's been years. We made a choice.”

But Hari wasn't ready to let the matter rest, and you don’t know how to tell her you’re close to calling it a day. “You made a choice for him,” she countered gently, her tone filled with empathy.

Stunned was an understatement. Caught off guard would be an apt description. But speechless was exactly how you felt.

That, you couldn't mask with anything.

So you did what you weren’t best at: admitting the truth.

“And I’ll do it again,” you whispered in return. It was faint, because it was more for you than more of a reply to her. 

You were both young, and half oblivious to what it would be like outside, where the world wasn’t painted in golden hues and the gentle waves were replaced by blaring cars.

You were both seventeen, young and living for the hope of it all.

But you lived for days like those – days where both of you just had to be kids still. No worries, no voices of what might come.

“Tell me about your dreams, Sae.” “Tch. You already know about it.”

You did. All of it, you knew. Since you were kids, no one knew him like you did. You were his lover and confidant. You knew about it, all too well and all too much.

“Come on!” you persisted, giving him an enthusiastic look. “The sky looks so pretty in this sunset, I want it to know about us.” The setting sun painted the sky in hues of pink and orange, casting a warm glow over the beach as you and Sae sat side by side in the sand. The sound of gentle waves caressed your ears, creating a serene backdrop for your beach date. He hesitated for a moment, looking out at the horizon. Then there it was, a glint of determination flashed in his usually reserved eyes. “To be the best striker in the world.” You couldn't help but be captivated by the sight. It was the first time you had seen such an unusual spark in his eyes. Sae's gaze was often cold and impersonal, but now it was as if stars were hanging in his eyes, reflecting the infinite possibilities of his dreams. Sae is handsome, mysteriously beautiful even. But this, nothing will beat how dreamy he looks when he speaks of his craft. You liked this look on him - so ambitious, so driven. It made your heart flutter with admiration. Seeing this glint in his eyes right now, you knew you wanted to do anything in your power to let it stay there.

And you did, you held on and held out. Until you turned nineteen, when you had let him go to the big cities where he rightfully belonged. 

You smiled, a genuine, heartwarming smile, and leaned in to press a tender kiss on his cheek. “I’m sure you will be the best.”

Maybe you bit off more than what you could chew, but in the end, you’d do it all over again. Because what you did, the choice you made – it was for the best.

You were both nineteen, young and eager to grasp the world's offerings with hopeful hands. 

But despite the certainty you tried to hold onto, there were nights when the memories tugged at your heartstrings like it did now. You knew it was the right choice, that you both needed to chase your dreams separately — especially his dreams. But it didn't erase the whispers of what-ifs that occasionally crept into your mind.

But life — life went on. Life never waits for anyone, anyway. And so, you worked diligently to craft a future that no longer had room for regrets.

But love leaves echoes, and his presence back in town stirred those dormant feelings. With him being in the same place, you felt like a stranger in your own town.

It was easier when he was thousands of miles away, an untouchable star on a different horizon. But now, with the universe conspiring to bring you close again, you couldn't help but feel like a wanderer in the galaxy of memories you built together.

After all, everything here in this town is about you and him. 

Six years.

Was it that long? He couldn’t really tell. Maybe time really does pass fast when your life is falling apart.

It has been six years since Sae has sat on the balcony of his childhood home. And like the sick bastard fate was, he’s welcomed by the sight of your horrified yet still so damn fucking beautiful face.

Perhaps the saints you prayed to didn’t hear any of your pleas, because despite calling out to each one, Sae saw you.

There you were, a flicker in the periphery of his vision, desperately trying to avoid him. He was trained to be very aware of his field of vision, so there was no way he wasn’t able to notice your frantic leaving and the hurried closing of your house’s door as you noticed him. 

He let you be, holding back the overwhelming desire to call out your name like he used to when both of you were running late to class. He let you be, because if you were to ask him, he wouldn’t know how to look you in the eye without a thousand words reflecting on his own. 

[Attention, everyone. This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 924 to Madrid, Spain. Again, this is the final –] “Sae, you’re going to miss your flight. They’re not coming.” No. “They’re not coming, Sae. You have to get on the plane.” No. No. Shut up.

He needed you there, more than anyone. A thousand people could cheer and show up for Itoshi Sae, but his eyes will always search the crowd for just one — just yours.

Yet, alas, you were nowhere to be found. And so, that very same day, Sae vowed to never come back to this place.

He hated this town and you, he’s convinced.

Sae had always been indifferent to a lot of people, everyone knew that. But never in a hundred years would anyone who knew you both think you’d be on that list. And deep down, he didn’t want to believe it either – until that day you decided not to show up when you promised you would.

He wasn't stupid. He had an inkling of why you did what you did. Yet, irrationality overpowered reason, and all he wanted that day was to run the distance between the airport and your house – to see your face, to remind you that he had plans, plans for both of you.

When Sae’s manager informed him that he needed to come home for a while to renew his passport, it was as if all of his suppressed recollections of this place – of you, came pouring out to his soul all at once.

Every street, every corner, every memory — they all threatened to consume him. His family, Rin, this town, and you – you were all the things he left behind for the dream.

Dream. Best Striker in the world. What did it even mean? Long ago, he thought he knew.

But it had to work. Everything had to work. He lost you for this dream. And if he loses it too, then what does that make him? A sore failure. And Sae was never known to be admissible to failing.

Whatever hell he encountered on the other side of the world, he swore he would never return home. Even when he was traversing across a path to ruin of being the person he thought he would be, he would never ever choose to come home.

Anywhere, but here. Anywhere, but home.

So there he was, the renowned glorious prodigy of japan. He was close to everything after countless mishaps. 

He’s getting closer and closer to the new dream yet getting farther and farther away from home.

Home. What does it even mean? Lately, he doesn’t even know. 

And after that day, no one ever mentioned your name to him. No one in his new world knew about you. No one knew how Itoshi Sae's world used to revolve around someone's soft smiles and easy eyes. 

He never asked anyone not to mention you; he wasn't one to ask, after all. But for some reason, no one dared to. Not even Rin. It was as if one mention of you in his presence was a carefully crafted brick used to make his castles crumble to the ground.

He hated that, but maybe they were right. Because with just a second's worth of a glimpse of you from earlier, Sae indeed felt his castles crumbling, piece by piece.

He hates you, for making his resolve crumble. For being the one person who can make his vow to never look back fall apart.

He hates you, because everything in this forsaken place is about you and him. Memories of your shared youth are etched into the very walls and streets, haunting him like ghosts of a past he can't escape.

He hates you, for not trusting you two would work it out somehow, and for giving up before the game even began.

He hates you, because it was easier that way. Easier to pretend he didn't care, that you didn't matter, and that you were just another soul he knows a little too much of.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more, and yet he knows, only one of it was true – and that he hates you for making him convince himself that he does, just to cope with leaving half of his heart to the only place he vowed never to come back to.

It was a jinx to say that yesterday’s encounter was already an unfortunate event, because today, you literally learned a whole new degree of unfortunate and unlucky – by having Itoshi Sae as your first customer of the day. 

“Welcome! How may I help you toda— S-Sae.”

And to even top it off, today was Hari’s day off. It meant that you’re currently alone in the same confined four-cornered room with the person you swore you would avoid like it’s your life mission.

Damn it, Hari. Of all days. Her day off really had to be today.

Itoshi Sae, in the goddamn flesh, is standing in your place two meters away from you, yet you’re having a hard time feeling your feet on the ground and your heart beating so damn loud. 

He wasn’t looking at you (thank god), and had his eyes exploring the place with a neutral expression playing on his face. Suddenly, you feel like sixteen again back when he was looking at the first set of cookies you’ve ever baked and you were dying to hear what he thinks of your craft.

“It’s yours?”

You gulp. 

You gulped down the urge to tear up with how much his voice changed. You gulped down the urge to cry because he assumed you had your dream turn into reality too.

“Yeah,” you replied in whisper, your eyes following where he was looking, trying to avoid any chance it will meet his, “it’s not much but —”

“It’s beautiful.” Even before Sae could hear your meek comment of yourself, he cut you off.

You were always like that —downplaying your hard work, belittling yourself even before someone does. He hated that about you. 

He used to get mad at you for it, especially when someone made fun of you at school and you didn’t defend yourself. He always makes you cry whenever he points it out, so he stopped. Instead, he made it his role to rebuild your confidence. Sae wasn't known for being generous in compliments. It would probably take one hand to count all the instances that he genuinely called someone along the lines of not dumb, stupid, lukewarm. 

But it was never the case with you. With you, to say beautiful was always a second nature to Sae's tongue.

And he wasn’t lying though. Your coffee shop was really charmingly cozy, and so like you. It’s so much alike to what you used to tell him how you envisioned it would be. 

The coffee shop was a quaint haven nestled right at the edge of the sandy shore. Its exterior, adorned with weathered wooden panels and soft, warm hues, exuded a rustic charm that welcomed passersby with open arms. Sunlight spilled through large windows, casting gentle rays that danced upon the vintage, mosaic-tiled floor.

It’s beautiful, and it’s in front of our place. He wanted to say to you, but he stopped at beautiful not wanting to make things more awkward than it should.

The coffee shop, it’s right in front of the beach. It’s in front of that one spot you and him used to call ours. 

It’s the first thing he noticed before coming inside, and it made him wonder whether you knew or he’s the only one who remembers it even now.

Bashful, you uttered a silent thank you to his remark, “What would you like to order?” you followed up, trying to maintain composure despite your heart racing in your chest.

Noticing that he’s been too silent for someone who’s about to order something, you looked up to your menu, and immediately, you understood his silence. If one were to point out, it is too immediate for someone who’s almost strangers to each other.

“We have non-caffeinated drinks too,” you hurriedly said to him, your voice quivering slightly as you tried to break the spell of awkward silence.

He gulps, his eyes locked with yours in a moment that felt like eternity.

He can’t drink coffee, it ruins his body clock, and you knew that. You still know that.

It appears that he's not the only one who remembers, after all.

A thousand emotions danced in his eyes, each one a testament to the love that once blossomed between you. The coffee shop, once a quaint haven, now felt like a crucible of emotions, and the atmosphere was thick with unspoken words, heavy with the weight of what could have been.

Your breath caught in your throat, and you couldn't look away, despite the rush of memories and unspoken words flooding your mind. It was as if time had folded in on itself, and you were once again those young souls who found solace in each other's presence.

But this was different, much more complicated. The past was a turbulent sea, and even though you had both moved on with your lives, there was still a deep, lingering connection that couldn't be severed.

Yet, you knew better than to let those emotions take control. You made a choice, you have to stand by it.

You were no longer the naive teenagers who believed love could conquer all. Reality had taught you both harsh lessons, and the wounds of the past still lingered, threatening to reopen with each stolen glance.

“I’ll have your best seller of it then,” he finally broke the silence, his voice steady despite the tempest inside.

With a nod, you turned to prepare his order, your hands trying to steady themselves. You couldn't help but wonder if he noticed the tremor in your fingers or the way your heart seemed to echo in every beat.

As you handed him his drink, your fingertips brushed lightly against his hand, and for a brief moment, the world stood still.

He took the cup from you, and for a fleeting moment, you both lingered, almost as if neither of you wanted to let go. He could stay in this, playing pretend. Pretend none of it happened, pretend he never left, pretend it worked out in the end.

But he can’t, not when you stepped back first, breaking the contact between you and reminding him of the choice you made.

“Thank you,” he managed to say, his voice softer now, filled with a hint of something even he couldn't quite decipher.

“You’re welcome,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

And just like that, the moment passed, slipping through your fingers like sand. He turned to leave, and you watched him walk away, every step taking him farther from the life you once shared.

Perhaps, in some parallel universe, there existed a version of you who chose differently, who stayed intertwined with him in a tale of love that defied all odds. But here, in this reality, both of you were no longer who you used to be.

In this universe, you're just some two ghosts standing in the place of you and him, haunted by the memories of what once was while trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat.

After Sae’s visit yesterday, saying that you weren’t doing fine would be a gross understatement. 

Your emotions were all over the place, and you couldn't seem to find a stable ground for your thoughts. It didn't help when your parents casually mentioned that he was leaving town later today. Apparently, Mrs. Itoshi had a little gossip session with the neighbors, unknowingly revealing a piece of her oldest son's business.

He’s leaving, and that's good—for you and for him.

As you stood behind the counter of the coffee shop, you absentmindedly glanced out the window, your eyes drawn to the beach. The sight of the shore brought back a flood of memories.

Maybe in another life, the two of you could still dance along the sandy shore, playfully splashing water at each other. He would chase after you, catching hold of your waist as he sweeps you off your feet. And perhaps, just perhaps, you would have the chance to embrace him tightly once again, with your arms wrapped around his neck while you share a kiss as greedy and fiery as the sea’s yearning for the moon.

And maybe, in another life, your story wouldn’t end with both of you being strangers who know a little too much about each other.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice the tears streaming down your cheeks until Hari whispered, “Y/N... you're crying.”

“Oh, I am,” you admitted, trying to regain your composure.

Your heart lurched as you tried to suppress the tears, but they kept flowing relentlessly. “Hari…” you whispered, shocked by your own emotional outpouring.

Hari's eyes reflected pity as she watched you, her voice soft and understanding. “Go,” she encouraged, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Get your man. I'll take care of everything here.”

The words hit you like a lifeline, a spark of hope igniting within you. You quickly removed your apron and grabbed your keys, determined to catch him before it was too late. 

But before you could dash out, Hari's voice echoed through the shop, loud and clear, “Go! Be happy! And for the love of god, no more sacrifices as a love language!”

With one last glance at her and your coffee shop, you rushed out the door.

The airport seemed like a maze of bustling strangers as you frantically searched for the departure gates. Every passing second felt like an eternity, the fear of missing him consuming you.

Desperation and determination fueled your steps as you approached the flight attendant, your voice trembling, “Flight to Spain — I need to know about the flight to Spain for today.”

The attendant looked at you with sympathy, “I'm sorry, but all flights to Spain have already left. The last one left twenty minutes ago.”

Your heart sank, but you couldn't give up that easily. “Can you check again? Please. I-I need to see him. Please.”

The attendant double-checked, but the outcome remained unchanged. 

Twenty damn minutes. You lost him in just that short amount of time.

Your heart shattered as you realized you had missed your chance. The desperation in your eyes was evident as you felt your world crumbling around you.

In the midst of the bustling airport, you allowed yourself to grieve for what could have been and for the chances you never took.

Six years ago, you were supposed to be here. And maybe if you did, you wouldn't find yourself six years after, wishing you did things differently.

The drive back felt like the longest journey of your life. 

The sinking sun painted the sky with hues of orange and pink as you approached the familiar place. As you got closer, you noticed that the shop was already closed, and you assumed Hari had taken care of everything. 

But what caught you off guard was the sight of Sae standing there, in front of your place, with a suitcase by his side, as if he were meant to be on a flight rather than standing there.

“You're here,” you whispered, your heart pounding in your chest as you got closer.

“I’m here.”

“Why didn't you leave?” you asked.

Because I’m done convincing myself that I hate you, Sae hesitated to say.  “Why did you go to the airport?” he countered instead, avoiding your question.

Because I’m done telling myself that I did the right thing. 

There were so many things you wanted to say, but the words were caught in your throat. You bit your lip, not ready to answer his question just yet.

Impatient and desperate, Sae took his chances to ask you the only question that mattered to him at this point, “Tell me you don't love me anymore. I will go. I will do as you please. I just need to hear it from you.”

Your eyes widened at his sudden question, but Sae wasn’t done yet. “Answer me. It’s a yes or no question.”

Lost in a whirlwind of emotions, you couldn't hold back the torrent of words that poured from your heart.

“A yes or no question, you say? Every night, I think of you.”

With each word, your voice wavered, and you couldn't help but express the worries that had plagued you during his absence.

“Were you eating properly? Does the food there suit your liking? You’re a bit picky. Is it too hot there? Were you taking your supplements? Were you being hard on yourself again? Is... is there someone new? There must be, right?”

As the words left your lips, you realized just how much you had been consumed by thoughts of him, wondering about every aspect of his life, even when he was miles away from you.

His reaction to you holding forth seemed to intensify at your last question, but right now, you weren’t ready to listen to him. He needs to listen to you.

“Every single night of the past six years, I yearned for you. I yearned to have you close. I yearned to hold your face just once more. And fuck, I would’ve traded all my tomorrows for just one yesterday with you.”

With those words, the floodgates of emotion burst open, and tears streamed down your cheeks. 

Fuck, six years. For six years, you held on and held out. Would it have been easier if both of you had tried, and along the way, lost? Would it have alleviated the pain of what-ifs and what could have been's if you had bargained, if you had gambled? Or would it all have led you right back to this moment, grappling with the same heartache and uncertainty?

Finally, meeting his eyes, you saw a reflection of your own emotions in his. But you weren’t done yet.

“And you dare ask me if I love you. Well, does that answer your fucking question, Itoshi?”

“Then, don’t cross it out. Don’t ever cross it out again.”

Cross what…out?

“I saw your letter,” Sae admitted, causing a momentary confusion to wash over you. 

My letter… Bewildered, you couldn't form the right words, and he took it as a sign to continue, and to close the distance between you to hold your hands.

“Tell me, how could I leave after reading that, knowing the only soul who truly knew me was here? You own me, Y/N.”

“I told you countless times before, you own me,” Sae reaffirmed, his grip on your hand tightening as he drew it closer to his lips, planting tender kisses upon your skin. 

“There was no one,” he continued, his words carrying a sense of reassurance. “And there's no other warmth comparable to yours that I'd ever let myself bask in. And if there's any, I'd be only fooling myself, pretending it was you instead.”

Sae's voice grew softer, yet resolute. “You own me, even when I'm on the other side of the world. You own me, Y/N. Even in the distance that separated us, even in the years that you claim I'm not."

He stepped closer, his eyes locked with yours, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. “No place can ever own me as much as you do. So, don't ever cross your I love you's to me. I want them – all. I don't want your sorry's.”

“But I’m sorry,” you whispered, for the last time. But Sae gently wiped away your tears.

“It's ‘I love you’ from now on.”

For a moment, you both stayed like that, trying to make up for the lost time. Sae, much like you, dreamed of the day he gets to hold you close once again. He dreamed of a day he gets to watch the sunset from the reflection of your eyes again.

Sae could go on and on listing a hundred more reasons why he shouldn't be standing here, and yet he knew, only one of it was true – and that he hated himself for convincing himself that he shouldn't be here – to you, in his hometown.

Sae may have vowed to never come back to this place, but it was always a lie, because for all he knew, it's the only place he truly belonged. Half of his heart was left here, with you.

“Come on,” Sae said, and you followed him, curiosity in your eyes.

“Where are we going?”

“There,” Sae pointed to the beach, your spot, specifically. “To our place. The sky looks pretty, and I want it to know about us, again.”

“Us... again?” you asked hesitantly.

“If you would take me back.” Sae answered, a hint of fear in his eyes, afraid that he might be assuming this second chance for the two of you.

You took his hand in response, and squeezed it three times. “I want nothing more than to be with you, again.”

Without any more words, Sae gently cupped your cheeks, his touch sending shivers down your spine. The touch of his fingers was both familiar and new.

In the fading light of the day, his eyes bore into yours with an intensity that made your heart race. The anticipation hung heavy in the air as you leaned closer to each other, your breath hitched as his warm breath mingled with yours.

His lips were soft against yours, and as they moved with a tenderness that mirrored the way he held you, it was as if he was trying to convey everything he had ever wanted to say to you in that one, passionate moment.

The kiss deepened, and you could feel the intensity of his emotions pouring into it. It was a kiss that spoke of all the words left unsaid, of all the nights spent missing each other, and of all the dreams of a future together.

Feeling the tears streaming down your cheeks, Sae pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. And in that moment, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be – here.

To you, in his hometown. 

💭 thank you for the request saetorinrin! (i owe you a lot for your patience i guess..)

note. hi. if you’ve been here before, you might know that i hate this trope with a burning passion, i just can’t write it for the life of me. i started this in may (and only had the guts to finish it this month lmao), i was so tempted to delete everything and start from scratch (for the nth time) but i think i owe it to myself to retain most of what i wrote when i was stranded on an island xd this isn’t my best, that, i know for sure. but i hope you’ll still like it ! 

💌 if you reached this part, and you want to know about reader’s letter that sae’s was referencing, here it is. you may or may not read this, it won’t really matter. but if you want to, click until the end :>

💭 back to: milestone event

hHsjdnfmddmmdrm

study sessions

pairing(s): oblivious!itoshi sae x flirty!male reader

summary: you are giving one too many hints that you like sae, but he gets none of them and assumes you two are a bit too close for friends. you decide to take matters into your own hands and be his secret admirer

warnings: none!

word count: 4.5k

a/n: thanks for the support on my last post i love you guys!! it’s like one of my biggest headcanons that sae is oblivious to things such as romance cuz the only thing he canonically knows abt is football 😭. i had no idea what to write for the notes so...yeah. also, i didn't intend for it to be so long, i just kept writing. anyways enjoy this mess of a fic! <3 (not proof read)

you sat in class, leaning on your right hand, thinking and a bit annoyed. how hasn’t sae taken the hint? you don’t just flirt with your friends, dammit! you probably couldn’t even ask him out cause he’d just assume you were joking. you don’t ask friends out as a joke either do you? friends…that word left a bad taste in your mouth. you were so blatantly obvious, but he couldn’t take the hint? you started thinking of plans that might work. then you settled on one. be sae's secret admirer, then reveal who you are! the more you thought about it, the more the plan seemed like a good idea. it was around a week from his birthday too, maybe that'd be your gift to him, a new boyfriend. you grinned in excitement, this was gonna be fun!

after you got home, you decided to write him a note and put it in his locker. you changed your handwriting while you were writing the note, not wanting him to discover who it was immediately. it was pretty simple, but kinda (very) directed at his obliviousness, but it was nothing out of his comfort zone. the note read "i think you're pretty cute, but you can't take a hint. maybe start paying attention to how others act around you!". you wondered if your plan would work, but only time will tell.

the next day you arrived early and put the note in his locker. you hoped that he wouldn’t throw it out like the other love letters and confessions he got. your prayers were answered though, as during lunch, when you were sitting at your guys’ desks, he said something. “i got a note in my locker today,” he said bluntly. “yeah?” you grinned, “and you didn’t throw it out?” you silently celebrated. “no, something about it was different.” he gave you the note and crossed his arms before leaning them on the table. “what did she mean by ‘start paying attention to how others act around you’?” his eyebrows furrowed in curiousity. “she, huh? you think it’s a girl?” you looked in his eyes. “are you implying it’s not?” sae raised an eyebrow. “just saying, ya never know” you smiled.

you stared at the note a bit longer. “kinda funny how they say you’re cute but then say you’re oblivious,” you chuckled, “can’t blame ‘em” you flirted, but the tone was quite subtle. “what’s that supposed to mean?” sae looked at you curiously, “don’t worry ‘bout it” you waved off. “seriously—nevermind. you’re impossible anyway” he sighed in defeat. you grinned at him, “yeah, i know.”

you looked over at the note again, “honestly, i think it’s a sign to think about anything other than football.” you remarked as you toyed with the edge of the note, your fingers tracing the words as you tried to gauge sae's reaction. “football is not the only thing i think about. it's important to me, though.” sae said, his tone a bit offended. “you literally don’t pay attention in class because you’re thinking about it.” you stared at him with an eyebrow raised, “that’s why we go on like study dates all the time.” you put the word ‘date’ on purpose, wondering how he’d react. “i guess you’re right.” he said indifferently. no reaction... “hey, we gotta test tomorrow, right? let’s go to my place and study for it!” you suggested, “but we have to practice for our upcoming practice match after midterms…” he protested, both of you were on the school’s team and often practiced together. “well you won’t play if you don’t keep up your grades!” you protested right back. “…fine. i’ll go over to your house.”

after the school day was over, you waited at the gates for sae so you two could walk home. he was late, which made you annoyed. so you decided to text him. his contact name read ‘sae ❤️’ which he never commented on, for some odd reason. you texted him “where r u?? i’ve been waiting for like 10 minutes”. after 1 or 2 minutes he responded with “sorry, some girl confessed to me. i think she was the one who left me the note.” oh how wrong he was…

sae finally met up with you and he was as stoic as ever. “well well well, look who showed up,” you got up from the wall you leaned on, “betcha you rejected that girl without hesitation as usual, didn’t you?” you smirked, seeing how she was clearly upset and tearing up. you hoped that wouldn’t be you… “i wouldn’t say without hesitation…” sae shoved his hands in his pockets. “yeah right! you totally did, she’s crying cuz of ya, playboy!” you snickered a bit, “it’s not funny, l/n. and don’t call me ‘playboy’” he looked at you coldly. “you’re such a buzzkill, it was a joke anyways, handsome.” you teased with a coy smirk before putting an arm around his shoulder. “ugh, don’t call me that either, what’s even the point of calling me that?” he replied with a grimace. “ah, just saying cause you are, and all the girls seem to think so too.” you smirked. “don’t joke around like that.” he said, a face of disdain became more evident. “see? a total buzzkill…”

you opened the door to your house before turning and speaking to him, “so, you wanna tell me what happened with that girl?” your curiosity was out of this roof. “she confessed to me like any other girl. but i think she was the one, cause she handed me a letter and the handwriting was pretty similar.” sae mentioned. “that so? and what if it doesn’t stop?” you asked, already knowing the answer. “try to find out who it is, i guess”

the two of you went up to your room. it wasn’t messy but it wasn’t clean either. you grabbed an extra chair, put it at your desk and you two started studying together. you regularly had the urge to stare at him for long moments of time, and “accidentally” brush your fingers on his when grabbing a pen. sae's gaze flickered to the folded paper on your desk, a curious expression crossed his face, “hey, what’s that?” you looked at the note, it was the second letter, but you couldn’t ouright tell him that, “uh, it’s a grocery list my mom gave me for tomorrow, cause she won’t be here.” and he took it, like that. “oh, okay.” then shrugged it off…

“hey, can you help me with this question?” sae asked, you already knew all the material, since you actually payed attention in class. “sure,” and you leaned over, a bit too close (on purpose), and started helping him with the question. “you get it now?” you asked, after some frustration. “yeah, thanks. you’re actually kinda smart.” he remarked backhandedly, “hey! what’s that supposed to mean? i’m very smart thank you very much! i wouldn’t even be in this situation if you actually paid attention in class. stop focusing on football so much!” you hit him on the head lightly, but in a playful manner. he tried to hit you back, but you dodged, right before your chair tipped backwards and you fell. “guess you could say i fell for you— ow!” then your head got hit, not as lightly by sae. “don’t say stuff like that.”

you faked a sulk for the rest of the time he was there, maybe he’d feel bad for you and kiss you or something. “you gonna keep pouting?” he asked, “yeah. maybe you should leave, you’re ruining my vibe with all this negativity!” you didn’t really mean that, but of course he thought that. sae really didn’t get social cues. “wait! i didn’t actually mean that—” then he shut the door. now you were actually sulking. stupid sae…didn’t even give you a kiss either.

it was day 2 of your plan, you bought a cute little seagull plush keychain and wrote a note to go with it. it read “hey, handsome! just wanna say, you’re a bit dense for not even getting one clue. but keep it up! i believe in ya!” maybe he’d get that ‘handsome’ was something that you’d often say to him…yeah probably not. it was a stretch. you did the same thing, go to school a bit early, put the things and his locker and pretend nothing happened. a part of you wanted this to continue, but the other didn't. there was an urge to tell him you liked him and get it over with. but where was the fun in that?

as you sat in class, you finished your test, which was fairly easy. but you seemed to zone out after that, your mind occupied on how to get sae to realize that it was you. the thought got you frustrated, but pumped out as you wondered what sae's reaction would be to your note. after class, there was a few minutes before the next teacher came in. "hey." sae said as he sat next to you, "soo...what'd ya think?" nudging him playfully with your elbow, his expression nonchalant as ever. "about...?" he asked, "about the test, silly! you think you passed?" he had to be fairly confident, i mean you helped him out. "uh, sure. it was kinda easy." he dismissed it, as always. "it's totally cause i helped you out, right? right?" you teased, "...right, whatever you say."

something seemed to be on sae's mind. maybe it was about the notes. your suspicions were confirmed when he said something, "i got another note today," he mentioned, his expression puzzled. you couldn't contain your excitement as you took the note from him and examined it before giving it back, "wow, another one huh?" you remarked casually, trying to conceal your eagerness. "what's it say?" you asked, your breath hitching in your throat. sae shrugged, clearly confused by the note's contents. "it's just… encouraging me to pay more attention to things," he replied, his brow furrowing in confusion. you tried to avoid yourself from smiling inwardly, knowing that your plan was working. "maybe they're trying to help you out," you suggested playfully, hoping he would catch on to your subtle hints.

despite your frustration, you found it impossible to not admire how clueless sae was, it was adorable, in its own irritating way. you tried to drop hints and flirtatious comments, but he seemed to brush them off without a second thought as you just "joking". but as much as you wanted to reveal the truth, there was a part of you that hesitated. what if sae didn't feel the same way? what if it ruined the friendship you had worked so hard to build? despite all this, you didn't want to give up either. you were so deep into this already.

so, for the rest of every period, your gaze remained fixed to him. thinking on how to confess to him, also admiring him. after a bit of thinking, midterms were the day after sae’s birthday, unfortunately. must suck, must suck even harder because all club activities were canceled for the rest of the week due to midterms too! but, there was a good part to it too, maybe he won’t focus so much on football. after school, before he was going to walk home, you called out his name.

“sae! wait up!” he turned around to see you jogging to him, “what?” sae snapped at you, not too rudely though, a bit annoyed he couldn’t be alone. “you wanna come over to my house to study for midterms? cmon, i know you’re not learning anything in class, as always!” you could see him be reluctant before sighing. “fine, but not today. i’m busy.” fair enough, it was fine, as long as if you got to confess to him on his birthday. “you better not be saying that so you can play football!” you turned to look at him and you saw he was avoiding your gaze. “you’re totally obsessed…” not like you could say anything. you were pretty much obsessed with football too (and him), but not as much.

the atmosphere was kinda awkward after that, so you decided to say something, “did you get another clue to who that person was?” you asked casually, trying to read his expression. “not yet,” he admitted, “but i know it’s someone closer to me. how else would they know seagulls were my favorite animal?” he wondered holding up the keychain, admiring it a bit in the light. “you gonna keep it?” you looked at the keychain as well, hoping he said yes, “yeah, it’s pretty cute. i don’t want to throw something like this away either.” you eyes naturally set on the way his lips curled up ever so slightly, the way his hair fell on his face and caught the sunlight. your face flushed as you scrambled to look away. if you didn’t realize it before, but now was when you realized how much you actually liked him.

“so, this one’s different, huh?” you tried to change the subject, “what do you mean ‘different’?” he asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity. you fumbled for words, as you thought about if he caught you staring or not, “i mean, normally you throw out any gift and reject every person…what’s so different now?” you swallowed nervously, hoping your words didn't come off too blunt. "i just meant... well, you usually don't keep stuff like this. but this time, you're actually considering it," you explained, trying to sound nonchalant. sae nodded slowly, seeming to think about your observation. "yeah, I guess you're right. It's just... different," he admitted, his gaze shifting to the keychain in his hand. he beat you to saying something else before you could, “it’s like, they’re close to me, right under my fingertip and i want to know who.”

“yeah?” you smiled at him again, admiring his features once more. “hey, hypothetically, if the person was a guy, would you care?” you asked on a whim, “i guess...not really." he replied with a shrug. "why do you ask?" you shrugged nonchalantly, but secretly felt relieved. at least he wouldn't out right reject you. trying to keep your nerves at bay, you tried to justify yourself, "just curious, y'know? it's interesting to think about." sae nodded in agreement, but you could sense a hint of suspicion in his gaze. it made you wonder if he was starting to suspect something, if he was beginning to piece together the puzzle of his secret admirer.

you waved him goodbye as he walked into his house. tomorrow was the weekend, so you couldn't outright give him anything, but you'd still hint at it when he came over to your house to study. that night, you tossed and turned in bed, partly from the thought of confessing, but also how good he looked on the walk back to his house. you rolled around in bed, almost like a middle school girl in a shojo. it wasn't your best of times, but you refrain from the thought of him, and him piecing together the puzzle had you biting your bottom lip in nervousness and excitement.

when saturday came, you paced back and forth in your room, thinking of what to say and do when he came. you felt pretty damn tired, too from last night, barely got a wink of sleep. you mumbled 'don't screw this up' over and over again when you heard a knock at the door. "sae! you made it!" you said with a sigh of relief, at least he didn't ditch you to watch game footage or anything like that, "yeah, i did." you tried to go in for a hug but he quickly dismissed that.

after an hour or so of studying, you got bored so you decided to hint what you were doing for his birthday. “sae, your birthday’s coming up right? october 10th?” you tried to put in the conversation casually, “yeah, why?” he looked at you with some suspicion, "i'm just asking. but, i'm sure you'd love me for my gift" a small, yet cocky smirk crept onto your face, "don't you mean i'd love 'it'?" he expressed, some more suspicion in his tone, "oh no, i know what i meant, you're gonna love me." he sighed in defeat, he knew there was no point in pushing it further.

so, that's basically how it went for the next few days. him being stupidly oblivious, you trying to drop the hint even further. you got nowhere, on wednesday, the day before his birthday, you decided to give him a flower. not an overly big bouquet, you'd probably save that for the actual confession, instead, you opted for a single flower. it was a flower he'd seen before, and that you knew he liked. there was a vase with a single flower in your room, his eyes consistently focused on it. it was a light pink hydrangea, it was beautiful, so you understood why he stared at it often. maybe he'd understand then. you decided to take the one that was in your room, when he came over that day, maybe he'd ask why the vase was empty and get the god damn hint already,

as per usual, you went early, dropped the gift off, and went off. there wasn't any note this time, as you were kinda sick of writing them. plus, the big day was tomorrow, you'd save every pent up emotion for then. you waited for him in the courtyard, when you spotted him in the courtyard examining the flower you went up to greet him. "hey, sae! looks like you got a flower now, huh?" you wrapped an arm around his shoulder to break him out of his trance, "yeah. this is the same flower that's in your room, right?" at least he got the hint, you pretended to study it for a bit before replying, "hm, yeah, it is. funny ain't it? maybe they know you really well." you looked at sae to gauge his expression, he did a simple nod and kept his blank expression. you clenched your fists in frustration as sae brushed off your flirtatious comment, a knot forming in your stomach. whatever, he'd have another shot when he went to your house anyway.

you were right, because when he went to your room, he noticed the empty vase immediately. "the flower is missing." he pointed out, "gave it to someone real special" you looked at him as you said that, "it was a nice flower, you should've gave it to me...but i can't really complain if they're that special to you..." you were instictively drawn to the way sae's expression softened when he talked about the flower, a hint of vulnerability shining through his normally neutral face.

you stared at him in a 'are you serious?' look. well yeah, you did give it to him, and he was special, "sorry, was that rude?" sae took note of your expression, "oh no no, it's something else," you quickly went back to focusing, "let's just cram for midterms" you muttered, hoping to divert the conversation away from your failed attempt at dropping another hint. you couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment that sae didn't seem to catch on to your subtle gestures. but you pushed those feelings aside and focused on studying for midterms.

nothing special happened, just some plain ol' cramming. but, you failed to focus on it. all your thoughts went to the day tomorrow. the thought had you feeling all sorts of emotions. sae noticed your unusual quietness and said something on the matter, "is something wrong? you're being awfully quiet." you felt yourself tense up, "just nervous for midterms...don't wanna fail...haha..." you made a pathetic excuse of a lie, he narrowed his eyes a bit, trying to examine your actions before ultimately deciding to drop it. at a desperate attempt to change the subject you decided to point something out that you noticed, "hey, the bracelets you normally wear, you don't wear them anymore," you pointed out, "oh, i lost them. hadn't gotten the chance to get new ones." you kept that in mind, you'd probably get him a new bracelet for his birthday.

you could barely sleep that night, you stayed up thinking what'd you say, do, act. everything had to be perfect, it probably wouldn't end up that way, but you tried your best. a voice popped up in your head that made you not even want to confess in the first place. it said the same things that made you reluctant before, 'what if he didn't like me back? what if i ruined our friendship?' what if this and that. but what if he actually liked you back, and everything turned out even better than you hoped? every thought was about the next day, it made your head spin. after a bit of staying up, you realized being all tired and having eye backs wasn't cute and a good look for a confession, so you forced yourself to sleep.

on the morning of sae's birthday, you woke up with a flurry of emotions swirling inside you. today was the day you would finally reveal your feelings to him. you couldn't focus on anything else, not even the midterms the next day. every thought was consumed by sae and the confession that awaited. as the day progressed, you found it increasingly difficult to contain your excitement. you kept glancing at the clock, counting down the hours until you could see sae and tell him how you felt. It felt like time was moving at a snail's pace, each minute dragging on endlessly. you went to his locker and put in the last note, 'meet me at the rooftop at 7:30'. it was short and straight to the point, no cryptic messages or hints.

you stood at the rooftop, your back leaning on the railing. your palms felt sweaty and you could hear your heartbeat get louder. your mind was full of feelings you wanted to get out. you were looking up at the sky to get your mind off of everything. the scenery was beautiful, you were lost in it until you heard the sound of the door opening, and there you saw him. the man you've liked since forever. his face was a mix of a lot of emotions, it was hard to read, to be honest.

as sae stepped onto the rooftop, the setting sun casting a warm glow around him, your heart skipped a beat. you felt the breath get sucked out of your lungs, he looked stunning, more than usual, actually. "hey, sae," you began, your voice trembling slightly with nervousness but filled with anticipation. "i'm so glad you actually came." his eyes widened in surprise, his gaze flickering between you and the breathtaking view spread out before him. "it was you?" he breathed, his voice tinged with disbelief. you chuckled nervously, your fingers fidgeting with the delicate bracelet you had carefully chosen for him.

"surprise…? if it wasn't obvious enough…" you paused, your heart pounding in your chest as you took a step closer to him. "there's something I've been wanting to tell you," you confessed, your voice soft but determined. with trembling hands, you slipped the bracelet onto his wrist, the cool metal contrasting with the warmth of his skin. "i really like you, sae," you whispered, your gaze locked with his. "it's been this way for a while, but I never had the chance to say anything." you reached out, presenting him with the bouquet of pale pink hydrangeas, their soft petals illuminated by the fading light. "these are for you," you said softly, a shy smile playing on your lips.

taking in a deep breath, you continued, your voice filled with sincerity and vulnerability. "i've been dropping hints since the beginning of time and i was hoping you'd catch on, but i realized i had to take matters into my own hands. i needed to tell you how i felt eventually. sae's eyes softened as he listened to your heartfelt confession, his expression shifting from surprise to something warmer, something more tender. "i…i didn't realize," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "i never knew you felt this way." you took a step closer, your heart pounding in your ear with anticipation as you reached your hand out to gently cup his cheek.

"i've been waiting for this moment for so long..." you admitted, your voice barely audible over the soft rustle of the breeze, "to finally tell you how much you meant to me. so please, can i be your boyfriend?" you gazed directly into his eyes, waiting for the dreadful answer. as you waited for sae's response, the tension in the air seemed to thicken, every passing moment feeling like an eternity. sae's gaze softened as he took in your confession, his eyes reflecting a mixture of surprise, uncertainty, and something else you couldn't quite place. you held your breath, your heart pounding in your chest as you awaited his answer.

finally, after what felt like an eternity, sae's lips curled into a gentle smile, a warmth spreading across his features. "know that i know how you feel, i don't want to waste anymore time." your heart skipped a beat as you felt a surge of hope and anticipation wash over you. could it be…? "sae," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the gentle hum of the wind, "what do you mean?" a soft chuckle escaped sae's lips as he took a step closer to you, his eyes sparkling with newfound clarity and determination. "i mean… i want to be more than just friends," he confessed, his voice steady and sure. "i want to be with you, too."

you felt excited and shocked and every other emotion there was out there. you uttered a single word, "really?" your heart felt like it was about to explode out of joy. sae nodded, his smile widening as he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against yours. "really," he whispered, his breath warm against your skin. "i've been blind for so long, but now that i see… i don't want to let you go." you wanted to cry, that's what. "you're so stupid for not seeing this...i never want to let you go too..." your voice trembled, you sniffled while saying it too.

"i'm sorry. i really am." he admitted, and without another word sae closed the distance between you two. time stopped, it was as simple as that. everything went to a halt as you tried to process what happened. the kiss was sweet and simple, just as you two liked it. in that moment, surrounded by the soft glow of the setting sun and the gentle rustle of the breeze, everything else faded away, leaving only the two of you lost in the sweetness of the moment. you pulled away after what felt like ages.

"happy birthday sae," you said softly, your voice at a barely audible level. "you're right, i did love you for this gift. thanks for everything." he smiled, his face totally different from his usual unemotional look. "no problem and," you held your breath for the next words you were about to say, "i love you." you felt at peace, you finally said what you've always wanted to say, "i love you too."

#Ragequit

Synopsis: They hear you say the most outrageous, uncensored, vulgar, out-of-hand, scandalous, disgraceful, atrocious things while raging playing games.

Warnings: Not proofread, vulgar language(?), fake threats (NO DEATH THREATS, I DON'T CONDONE THAT), suggestive 😨😨 (I warned you it was atrocious)

Note: These are all real things quoted by my friend, @dewwberry. I'm being fr right now

Featuring: Micheal Kaiser, Sae Itoshi, Rin Itoshi, Yoichi Isagi x GN! reader

Micheal Kaiser

"Sweetheart, are you done with the computer?" You peek your head into the room, watching his gaze melt when you enter the room. Kaiser turns his chair to face you, arms instinctively reaching out to hold you by the waist. You get his message, straddling yourself onto his comfortable lap.

"Mhm," Kaiser releases his gentle grasp on you, allowing you to shift around and face the computer. "Playing games, eh?" Kaiser whispers to you, fingers traveling to your hips as he rests his chin on your shoulder. You nod, "I've been bored all day and you've done nothing but work so..."

"Let me watch then," Kaiser hums, leaning back to give you space. Cracking your knuckles, you excitedly drum your fingers against the table as your favorite game loads in.

You hear congratulatory whistles from the man behind you every time you got a headshot, pulling your hair out of your face whenever it bothers you. Honestly, it felt more like he was staring at your focused expression than the game itself. He couldn't help but tease you, a cheeky grin forming on his face when his hands travel from your waist down to your hips and rested comfortably on your thighs.

An irritated groan escapes you when you die again due to the same guy, smashing your mouse against the mouse pad, "I'm gonna shoot your house down," You continue to swerve your mouse around, unaware of your boyfriend, absolutely stunned by your words. (He's played games with you... what have you said about him without him knowing?)

Normally, he would laugh his ass off at you dying again

"Yeah, that's right, eat my ass!" You jump in your seat, a victorious cheer escaping you the moment you kill off the last guy. Kaiser blinks at your sudden words, eyes widening when you innocently type in an innocent 'gg!!' in the chat.

You turn your head to him, a satisfied look on your face. Tilting your head, you asked, "Something wrong?" Kaiser recovers from his shock, a frown on his face. "You can't go saying that to strangers, Meine Liebe. I only want to hear you saying that to me."

Kaiser feels an elbow nudge him, a flustered face looking back at him. Don't expect to receive an apology though, he was 100% serious about what he said.

Sae Itoshi

Normally, Sae would expect his lovely significant other to greet him home with warm arms and a kiss - especially after a long trip away from home. It's been so many nights and days since he was in your arms, he'd really love to receive a good hug from you right now.

However, all he received when he opened the door was the sound of gunshots and ecstatic shouting. Almost instantly, he knew you were on that game again. Sighing, he closes the door. All the sounds he made were drowned out purely by how loud the game was.

Softly opening the door, he looked inside the room. A small smile unconsciously forms on his face, watching you with a competitive grin on your face. Judging by your expression, you seemed to be winning by a landslide.

Leaning back on your chair, cheers erupt from you and your teammates as the game ends. "Hold up, let me get some snacks," Your teammate says, typing 'afk' in the chat.

"Hm, I'm craving Sae's lollipop." Sae's smile twists into a stare of disbelief, jaw dropping. Did you really... really just say that out loud?

Sudden gunshots ensue as you arch your back to lean forward to your computer. Urgently clicking on your keyboard whilst you run away from the players chasing you down, "(Teammate name), get back here and help me! Ohmydaysohmydays,"

"AAA, you better stop shooting me or else I'm going to shoot your whole family down!" You scream at the computer, "I hope both sides of your pillow are warm tonight!"

You feel a hand press against your forehead suddenly, stealing your attention away from the computer as you blink incessantly at your husband. "Oh, Sae! You're home, already?" Your aggressive tone dissipates as if it never even existed - you completely switched characters.

"...Are you sick?" Your fingers glide around Sae's hand against your forehead, feeling around your face and shaking your head. You hear sad music from your computer and your attention returns to the computer, "Fuck, I died."

Sae's hand cups your cheek, fingers digging into your skin a little harder than you'd prefer. His hand snaps your neck to gaze back at him. He rests his forehead against yours for a few seconds, closing his eyes. Your lips part for a moment, in awe of the man you married in front of you.

Sae suddenly breaks the tension, standing back up. "If you're not physically sick, you have to be mentally sick for saying that." You scoff dramatically even though you had a grin planted on your face, turning your chair back to face the computer. Reviving yourself, you won the round in a short amount of time, your mouth zipped shut.

He smirked in response to your new attitude, playing along, "That's my girl." You replied to his comment with a good jab to his side.

Rin Itoshi

Being quite competitive himself, he loved to play games with you. He's had his fair share of matches with you and I can 100% assure you he says the most barbaric, diabolical things. He was dragged into Roblox because of you and you made fun of him for losing to a bunch of 9-year-olds.

He would bet a lot of things whenever the both of you play games. Little arguments and disagreements like who would choose where to eat would always be settled with games. It was a boost of pride for him whenever he saw your defeated face, pouting and huffing for a rematch.

His favorite games are when the both of you can work as a team (2 player princess tycoon). An involuntary smile appears on his face whenever the both of you win, insisting that he carried the team to victory. For some reason though, he can only play as a team with you. He only takes orders from you and hates being told what to do by Isagi or Bachira.

"The last one is running over to your side, they should be low right now," Rin comments to you, who is calling him over the phone.

"Come here, Pookie!" You grin as you begin to chase the person, not noticing Rin's disgusted glare at you. "As long as you get him, I don't care what you call him," He rolls his eyes. Despite what Rin had retorted, you had always been the one calling him Pookie so it soured his mood a little to hear you call someone that.

Once you shoot off the last person, a bright victory banner appears on both of your screens. "RAHHH, big daddy wins again!" You exclaim, stretching.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he seems almost disappointed with your antics. "I'm coming over," You let out an audible 'huh' at his sudden declaration. "W- what? Why?" The notification that he left the server does nothing but confirm that he's actually on his way.

After a lot of shuffling and background noise, Rin replied "To shut you up." What a lame excuse to come over and hang out, right? You giggle at his words, leaving the server and lifting yourself up to your feet, and fishing out your keys. Judging by the background, you guess that Rin's already close by.

Opening the door for him and leaning against the frame of it, you question, "And, how will you do that?" Out of nowhere, Rin appears in your line of vision, a hand on your chin as he gives you a passionate kiss. After he breathlessly breaks the kiss, he wraps his arm around your waist, "I'll shut you up like this."

Yoichi Isagi

Isagi had gone out to buy snacks a while ago, noticing how you haven't eaten all morning because you were too preoccupied with your game. The moment he returned home, he could hear your yells and he deduced that you still haven't gotten off that game.

"Ohmygosh, he picked me up!??!" You yelled out loud which made Isagi's movements come to a halt for a second... what kind of game were you playing now? He feels chills slither down his spine, shivers rushed through him whilst he pieces together memories of you buying this love simulator game on a whim.

"I love being held by men, especially Isagi," He heard a giddily sweet giggle from the room, making his cheeks heat up when your words repeat in his head like a broken record. He hears the voice of another woman - probably from the game judging by how... dramatic it sounded.

"You... I...!" The woman from the game blurted, "This isn't over! I'll be back. He's mine, you better watch your back." It sounded like a classic mean girl.

Isagi hears another prideful laugh, entering the room just as you state the most repulsive, foul, vile thing ever, "HAHA, suck on my big fat juicy nuts."

You hear the creak of the door, snapping your head over and covering your mouth to stifle your gasp. An awkward moment of deafening silence burns this moment into your memory, you feel your gut twist in a bad way.

You bury your flushed face in your palms in shame, profuse apologies slipping from your lips. "Aha, that's certainly not the thing I expected to hear when entering a room," Isagi plays it off, having experienced a lot of embarrassing moments in front of you too.

He looks at your screen, seeing an avatar that somewhat resembles him and another avatar that resembles you. Isagi laughs, patting your back when you curl yourself up into a ball and hug your knees to your chest.

"I mean... they're sort of cute together?" Isagi mentions. You scream internally, chiding yourself. "Isagi, sweetie, as much as I appreciate your effort, you aren't helping."

You feel warm fingers slowly graze your cheek, lifting your head up to return his gaze. His maneuvers are smooth, slowly tucking your hair behind your ear and leaning in for a deep kiss. You see him step back - almost too early to your liking. Your finger pats your lips, still registering the kiss you got.

"Your new chapstick tastes good," You see Isagi lick his lips before bending down for another kiss, holding your hand by the wrist out of his way.

"Did that make you feel better?" He grins, a rosy pink adorning his cheeks, content with your nod.

MASTERLIST :

☆ fluff

-BLUE LOCK-

reo mikage -gift- ☆

sae itoshi -cuddles!- ☆ -date- ☆

rin itoshi -small flu- ☆ -twins- ☆ -tanghulu- ☆

multi character: cute things they do in a relationship with the bllk men! ☆ pt 1 pt 2

©hioriri/fuyukohasnocreativity do not copy, repost, or translate. likes and reblogs are accepted and appreciated! *dividers @cafekitsune

MASTERLIST :

☆ fluff

-BLUE LOCK-

reo mikage -gift- ☆

sae itoshi -cuddles!- ☆ -date- ☆

rin itoshi -small flu- ☆ -twins- ☆ -tanghulu- ☆

multi character: cute things they do in a relationship with the bllk men! ☆ pt 1 pt 2

©hioriri/fuyukohasnocreativity do not copy, repost, or translate. likes and reblogs are accepted and appreciated! *dividers @cafekitsune

♡ cute things they do in a relationship! (pt 2!)

(pt 1 here!!)

things they do that makes your heart flutter <3

featuring ☆ isagi, bachira, chigiri, nagi, reo, rin, & sae

tag(s) ☆ fluff!

ISAGI would plan dates for the two of you, based on your interests/the stuff you like. the first thing he puts on top of his planner is 'make sure y/n has a blast!!'

BACHIRA would occasionally stare at you while the two of you are eating. whether it's at home or in public, and you notice it. "how come you keep staring?" "it's not my fault that you're just too beautiful."

CHIGIRI would give you headpats, anytime, anywhere. you finally came to the conclusion that this is one of the ways he shows affection towards you, since he doesn't give headpats to anyone else.

NAGI would snuggle with you while in bed. sometimes, he unconsiously does it in his sleep. and, you happily hug him back, nuzzling in the crook of his neck.

REO would cuddle with you for a really really long time. he says its for recharging from being away from you for a certain period of time.

RIN would carry stuff for you, even if it's not heavy. rin would randomly just take whatever you were carrying carry it from his shoulder.

SAE would intertwine fingers with you. sae would fill in the gaps in between your fingers with his, it's just something he enjoys.

a/n: hihi! this is a pt 2 for i had no idea what to do bc of my horrible writer's block + school :') ps i wrote this when i was at a library lmao

©hioriri/fuyukohasnocreativity do not copy, repost, or translate. likes and reblogs are accepted and appreciated!

♡ cute things they do in a relationship! (pt 2!)

(pt 1 here!!)

things they do that makes your heart flutter <3

featuring ☆ isagi, bachira, chigiri, nagi, reo, rin, & sae

tag(s) ☆ fluff!

ISAGI would plan dates for the two of you, based on your interests/the stuff you like. the first thing he puts on top of his planner is 'make sure y/n has a blast!!'

BACHIRA would occasionally stare at you while the two of you are eating. whether it's at home or in public, and you notice it. "how come you keep staring?" "it's not my fault that you're just too beautiful."

CHIGIRI would give you headpats, anytime, anywhere. you finally came to the conclusion that this is one of the ways he shows affection towards you, since he doesn't give headpats to anyone else.

NAGI would snuggle with you while in bed. sometimes, he unconsiously does it in his sleep. and, you happily hug him back, nuzzling in the crook of his neck.

REO would cuddle with you for a really really long time. he says its for recharging from being away from you for a certain period of time.

RIN would carry stuff for you, even if it's not heavy. rin would randomly just take whatever you were carrying carry it from his shoulder.

SAE would intertwine fingers with you. sae would fill in the gaps in between your fingers with his, it's just something he enjoys.

a/n: hihi! this is a pt 2 for i had no idea what to do bc of my horrible writer's block + school :') ps i wrote this when i was at a library lmao

©hioriri/fuyukohasnocreativity do not copy, repost, or translate. likes and reblogs are accepted and appreciated!

A TASTE OF HOME

YANDERE! ITOSHI BROTHERS X CHUBBY READER

content warnings ─── noncon, dubious consent, unprotected sex, rin loses his shit, obsessive behaviors, possessive behaviors, delusional thoughts, aged up characters (both brothers are pro), dead dove do not eat. it sums up everything. reader is engaged/married to sae. sae and reader have a child together or is his?

ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ rin finally gets his taste of what's his and the consequences of it. will fate place itself on his favor?

"rin!"

a call of his name brought him out of the deafening cheers of the crowd. how could rin forget that voice. clear and soothing as the waves of the sea. turning around, rin's eye slightly widens. you were there calling him and he stares at you.

all in the flesh and moving. taking small steps at him as you approach him and there's a slight hesitation in there. his heart beats faster than normal, it's almost leaping out of joy.

"rin. it's been years." looking at your eyes and the shine in them from seeing him. your hands at your side and when he nods, you wrapped your arms around him.

rin almost groans when he felt your soft, plush body pressed against his lean body. how it feels the same when you hugged him like those years before you left him. warm and comforting. a smile threatening to surface up in his face but fought it.

you're here and of course, his older brother too. a few step behind you, gaze watching you and him. it's always the same bored look he sports and rin got nothing but to punch his brother in the face.

he didn't hug you back, his gaze never leaving his brother. the same teal eyes of his brother similar to his only stares back at him. it seems like yesterday he declared his love for you in front of his brother and now you're here. a tight bear hug on him, embracing him with such joy that he's happy that you miss him.

releasing your arms around his body. you slowly stepped back from him. a sad smile in your lips. knowing rin is still upset from suddenly leaving him when you decided to follow sae to spain.

"it's nice to see you again, rin." reaching out to him to kiss his cheek before turning away from him. you can still sense the pain you had caused him. your absence breaking his heart in your last moments in the past and you can only distance yourself. afraid that you will hurt him furthermore. no words were said, the reason it will just hurt him more.

stoic his face is seen the outside, rin could perceive your skeptic attitude towards him. your sad smile in his thoughts replaying all over again. giving him the space he needed. he thought he's emotions slowly cracks at his shell but it only hardens. leaving him no space to show what he truly felt. they're not allowed to see him, to be this vulnerable. those eyes following him, his brother and you. you're not allowed to see his weakness, not even a moment of it and rin wished you could be his again.

sae could not resist you and so he returns home. to his parents and to his brother. sae knew there's no way of mending his relationship his brother but he can pretend. they can pretend while they ate dinner at their parent's house with yours.

you sat beside him and your parents in the opposite direction. a talk between bites and their playful banters of the latest gossip between mothers and the usual talk between fathers.

"sae, what's your plan now?" his father asks. taking a swig from the spirits in his cup. the table went silent for a minute for his response.

he looks at you and you gave him a nod, giving a small smile.

"stuff, preparing for the next season and before that, (y/n) and i are engaged." he briefly said. reaching out for your hand and links it to his. no explanations were followed. period. you and him are engaged.

his father puts his fork down and scoffs, "about time. congratulations, son." he praised, your mother and his gasps followed by a banter. "guess we're related now!" they almost exclaimed.

engaged. his brother is now engaged to you. he can see the ring cushioned in your chubby ring finger and his mouth goes dry. like he swallowed sawdust in his mouth. his hands gripping the spoon that it almost bends. his heart rate increasing as moment goes by.

rin excuses himself, no words were said. he simply walks away on the dinner table. his fist clenched while he walks back to his old bedroom. rin wants to cry but no tears came. rin remembers he doesn't shed tears. no matter how frustrating or hopeless he felt.

the coldness growing deep inside him. why must he always lose in everything. the room temperature drops and he stares at the television in front of him. his reflection on the television screen and he looks pathetic. the temperature drops a few degrees in his room and at this point rin doesn't know if it's the room or his feelings are cold.

a knock in his bedroom door, breaking him out of his trance. he thinks so. rin turns around to look to the person who was disturbing him.

his lips formed into a thin line while he stares at you.

closing the door behind, you sat beside him. a distance where put. not wanting to invade his space.

"rin. i'm just checking up on you." you started. trying to start a conversation with him. rin just looks at you emotionless. still processing on what happened earlier.

"you should be downstairs, with my brother." he nonchalantly says, no emotion to display.

"i know, i just want to be with you for a bit." your hands into your lap while you twiddled with your engagement ring and rin wants to snap out to you. tell how vile you are for playing with his feelings but he remained silent. he doesn't have the guts to do that to you. you don't deserve it.

it's not your fault. it's his brother's. he took you away from him. made you broke the promise you made to him on that day.

your eyes darts to the shelf whereas his and sae's trophies and picture frames are held but it's gone. they're all gone except for your photograph.

he looks back at his reflection, the bed behind him. would things be different if you had not decided to follow his brother.

his sight narrows into yours.

"did he force you?"

"who? sae? no, he didn't rin. why would you think that?"

"it's the only the reason why you left me."

a solemn look cascades to your face. lips slightly parted. it was true. you left him but you can't left sae also. needing you more than ever.

"sae needs me there, rin."

rin scoffs at you answer. "need? that's it? need." gripping his dark green hair, showing those teal eyes that is filled with disbelief and anger. rin couldn't believe what he was hearing. you left him for his selfish brother who only thinks for himself and what he wants.

"am i not enough for you? to choose sae over me. i have always loved you, (y/n). i always will." rin said, declaring his love for you. after all these years, he finally said it and rin feels like there's a heavy weight removed in his shoulders.

your eyes widens at his confession. speechless you are, it took awhile for you to respond. rin harbored feeling for you all these years and you felt bad. leaving him for the other but what can you do. you were young and stupid at that time. until now, emotional maturity isn't one of your strong suits.

choose the one and you'll destroy the other. you hadn't seen rin to be these emotional but how could you judge him. the heavy burden of surpassing his older brother and his feelings he kept for you all these years. you seem heartless in comparison. finding the dream in spain with sae.

with a shake of your head and biting your lower lip. you fought a sob. knowing that you can never reciprocate rin's feeling. you were engaged. you are starting a new life with sae.

"rin." beginning to construct the right words. "you're enough. you always are and i can't return your feelings rin. i'm with sae now." bundling up your dress in your fists. you felt pathetic. you can't even find the right words for him.

oh, he lost. again. to his older brother. is there anything his brother can't take something from him. life sure finds a way of mocking him. belittling him in every efforts he made. his affection for you doesn't even your mind nor your feelings for sae. if he can't have you, so does sae.

a pure rage settles in his eyes. rin can't believe what he's doing but he had enough. he finds ways in getting what he wants. improve himself. he did. dedicated himself for soccer. he did. indulge himself to you. he will.

a brief calmness took over him. rin leans down to you. dead calm he is but you can never ignore calm, not when it's calm before the storm. a storm that rages deep inside him.

his fingers in your chin, "you're mine, (y/n). i don't give a fuck if you're engaged to sae. you will always be mine." he whispers, brushing his lips to your ears and you felt small.

"rin, please understand i don't mean to hurt you and i'm sorry. it's my decision to be with sae. i value us, rin. there are circumstances that we can't avoid and this is it." you explained, reaching out to hold his cheeks into your hands.

if this was in a different scenario, rin would relish unto it. you comforting him in ways that only you can do it. foreheads pressed and your eyes. it's so pretty and true like a dream he don't want to wake up.

"i never meant to hurt us, rin. i wish life was just kinder to us. you still have a life ahead of you rin. don't waste it to me. some things are never meant for us." your eyes glossy and rin couldn't be bothered. it was just an excuse. you can't love him the way he loves you.

"waste my life to you? i am prepared for that. this is what my future should be. with you. do you think i would shed tears and blood for all the hard work so sae can have you? there's no way i'll give you up easily to sae. you're mine! you're fucking mine." rin fumes at you. his muscles tense and those teal eyes of his bore into you with burning resentment.

you flinched at his outburst. never did that you will ever hear rin be this angry at you. a tear slips in your eye. you remained silent, not knowing how to calm or mend what's left in rin. you felt hopeless and just like that you choose to flee.

"i'm sorry, rin. i really am. i should probably go." fixing your cardigan and standing up to open the door.

a hand grabbed your arm before you can turn the knob. "you ain't leaving me here, not until i got taste of what's mine." your body freeze at the sudden contact and you were shoved to the bed. the sheet rustles when your back hits the soft mattress and you were pinned by rin. his whole weight putting it whole above you to avoid escape.

"rin! what the hell you're doing to me?! stop it!" you cried out. thrashing to break free from rin. your back arching to disturb rin's balance and you succeeded. momentarily shoving him off. your feet touching the cold floor but before you can reach the door, rin's hand were way faster to grab you by your cardigan.

pulling you away to the door and shoves you again to the bed. this time his whole weight crushing you. his hands into your wrist. his legs pinning you down.

"stop resisting, you would make this harder for us." holding your wrists so hard that it's going to crush your bones if it wasn't for the extra cushion you had in your skin.

"this isn't different from what you and sae is doing. i can be him. better than him."

his expression dark and menacing that if you move you'll be killed.

"this is wrong, rin. stop this. please!" you plead. swallowing the nervousness you were having. hoping it'll convince him.

no convincing will change his mind. a brief memory flashes in rin's mind.

suddenly, with rin pinning you down under him. it reminds him where you two would casually play fight during winter. in the snowy field. a thick snow coating the entire place. puffs of cold air in the middle of winter. snowballs are thrown to each other and you laying down. too tired to run from rin and he will join you. the time of innocence where nothing bothered you two at all. that you both are fine from the absence of sae.

his cheeks flushed with the color of pink from the coldness. his hand holding yours for warmth and you would squeeze it. tell him it's fine and he would smile from that.

darkness looms all over rin and his expressionless gaze only leaves him with nothing but lust and longing for you.

there's no telling on what's rin was thinking. it has always been the same expression he shared with his brother. there's no going back with this.

your cries only fell into rin's deaf ears and his eyes is only filled with anger and lust.

rin leans down and his lips makes contact with yours. it only started as slow and rin gauges what your reaction will be but you only whimpered. moving your head to the side, his lips into your cheek for him to kiss and it angers him but it doesn't deter him from kissing the side of your head.

his head moving down and his lips also and it stops where your pulse is. your lips wobbled and no matter how you move, his strength only holds you down. so much for underestimating rin's body mass compared to yours, you could easily overpower him but years of training left him with nothing but pure strength.

rin licks the skin in your neck and you shivers. hoping rin would just stop but no matter how you pleaded he won't.

"sae..." you called out and rin heard it. his mind in swirls and it fuels him to just mark you and kiss and lick the skin in your body.

his grip tightens. his anger surfacing with the call of his brother's name. his actions starting to get more aggressive.

rin removes the cardigan you were wearing and fuck the dress you were wearing. god, you look fucking gorgeous under him and fuck you for calling his brother when he's the one who's making you feel good. he loves you so much that he can forgive you for your stupid decisions of not choosing him.

your hands hold his wrist when his fingers came to loosen the straps of your dress. your hands freed when realizing resistance if futile. a man is stronger when feelings are involved and that's the situation you're in. you couldn't bring yourself to scream nor shout for help. it would help you out of this situation but you don't want his parents and yours especially sae that you were pinned down by your soon-to-be brother-in-law. knowing the full understanding that you will be blamed for the situation you were in. tempting a man like rin.

"r-rin. i don't want this." you tears clouding your vision. you could only make up what rin looks like above you.

tears poured more when you feel your dress sliding down. your chest exposed and you can feel the humiliation to be bare in rin's eye.

seeing your frightened expression and the tears in your eyes, it only fuel his obsession to you. there's no other person who could make him feel this way. rin waited too long. too long to be this close to you.

his sight darts to your exposed body. the dress resting on to your hips and rin licks his lips. this is what his brother feasted on for years. indulge himself in this body of yours and rin shivers. it was finally his turn and he's going to spoil himself, for the hardwork he earned for himself. a reward befitting for him.

rin drinks in the sight of your body. the scars. the streaks of the discolored skin decorating your body. your flaws exposed to him and he admires it like it was an artwork. a piece of art that only of the blessed could see something like this. your love handles in display and the insecurities you had.

his hand holds the hem in his sweatshirt before pulling it above him. throwing the garment in the unknown part of his room. in no time, rin is also naked. prepares himself to claim what's his.

"i stopped caring what you had want, it's my turn." rin said before forcing you into a kiss. his lips moving expertly into your and rin cups your jaw making you open your mouth and he shoves his tongue inside to you. tongue swirling and a moist sound of exchanging of saliva is surfacing up.

the desperation, the longing, the lust and other emotions are mixed in his kisses. rin waited for this long. for a kiss from you. even he forced it. his feelings mixed up on those kisses and he doesn't stop when you're almost running out of breath.

the satisfaction of kissing you was more that he could expect from you. the softness of your lips molds perfectly in his. it's almost you were made for him. he stops when his air is running short.

a string of saliva connecting your lips and his and rin only licks it.

his mouth finding the skin in your shoulder. kissing and nibbling wherever his mouth finds it's way to your skin. to your nonexistent collarbones and to your chest. giving them his full atenttion.

rin cups the mound of flesh in your chest. rolls the stiff peaks in between his finger while his mouth encircles in one of your buds. only hums of satisfaction leaving in his mouth while he worships you. kissing every marks in your body. make sure they are kissed and marked.

it wasn't long before rin reached your sweet cunt. begging to be filled from the wetness he was seeing and your thighs preventing them to touch it but rin was having none of it.

prying your thighs with his strength and you could only cry. no matter how much you kick and thrashed he'll only overpower you.

"i'll make you feel good." he only mutters before taking a long lick in your juicy cunt making him groan at the taste. his arms hugging the pillowy flesh of your thighs.

his tongue flattening in to your chubby pussy lips, catching the the click coming out from your hole. every suck and slurp send you to your impending orgasm.

"r-rin!" your thighs trembles around his head and rin smirks. your hips unconsciously grinding to his face and continuing his licks to your cunt and fuck did it feel good for him when you cums in his face.

you remained helpless and rin climbs up into you. holding your face with his hands whilst his thumb is wiping the tears that is freely flowing out of your eyes. at this time when rin sees you cry, he attempts to comfort you in his way but now he was the reason of it. only staring at you with no expression.

"i don't want it, rin. let me go. i'm begging you." you can't do anything but cry harder when rin is already slipping his length inside you.

rin grunts when he feels your warm wall engulfs him. so tight and he had to slowly bury his length to you inch by inch and rin almost drools when his cock fully settled inside you. your walls spasming around him, if rin had no control. he had already cummed inside you seconds ago.

rin admires your expression in front of him. the tears staining in your cheeks an your lips forms into a pout. you were hurt but it can't compare what he had to endure from the suffering his brother had inflicted to him and from stealing you away from him.

this is revenge and it will be the sweetest one for him.

his hips started to move, fully thrusting his length to yours and a cry left in your lips. the delicious drag of his cock inside yours made it intense. slick continuously escapes from your hole.

rin digs his fingers into the plushness of your waist while thrusting his cock inside you. it's almost sick.

rin could never think that he'll love another woman besides you. his one and only. you were irreplaceable. you should be in his arms. he will do everything in his power just to have you and he will treat you so much better than his brother could do.

he can feel the coldness of the ring in your ring finger when you hold his wrist.

he don't care. he don't care if you're marrying his brother in this situation where he's fucking you. maybe, sae will leave you and he'll have you for himself. that wasn't a bad idea. maybe, he could get you pregnant. that's right. he could do it.

with a new found resolved, he plunges his cock deep inside you, hitting your sweet spot that gets him going from how you were hard clenching. you want him. he can feel from how tight you were hugging him.

his heart beating than usual, your moans becoming louder in his ear and rin pants knowing he's so close. just a few more. he'll be marking you as his too. fuck. you're so beautiful. so damn gorgeous. your soft tummy jiggling at his thrusts, your face twisted in the pleasure you can't dent and

your words are barely coherent at this point. rin's desperate thrusts while he ravishes you and your body drowning in the sinful pleasure he was giving you. your cunt getting tighter at the pounding he was giving you. the familiar build up of your incoming release gathers in the pit of your stomach.

rin's pants, the sheen of sweat coating each other's skin and your vision getting cloudy. your tears still drips out from your eyes.

rin curses out, followed by a groan while his thighs shook, flashes of white passing through his eyes while he releases his load inside you. thick, white spurts of his cum coating every inch inside of you.

his orgasm triggers yours. a choked sob followed by the shaking of your thighs. heavy pants coming from your mouth. you closed your eyes for a minute, riding out from the intensity of the orgasm. like waves after a storm and your body lays limp under him.

rin doesn't bother to pull out his cock. making sure every drop of his cum takes over your insides. peppering your body with kisses.

"you're mine." he mutters and connects his lips to yours but you turned your face to the side. his lips hitting your cheek and rin got annoyed. gripping your jaw and forces his lips into yours.

"much better." he said before laying besides you. his arms draping all over your body.

a tear drops in your eyes. followed by another and then another. you felt used. betrayed. how can you face sae? your fiancee.

how could you tell him, his younger brother fucked you in the old bedroom of his and would he believe you?

the dread and the realization dropped like you were being poured of ice cold water. shivers running down to your spine.

gathering the last remaining strength you had. you slowly picked up your clothes. dressing up and fixed yourself like nothing happened. slowly but surely, you buttoned your cardigan. wiping your tears with the palm of your hand and you sniffle.

rin's arms wrapped around your soft middle. your cries getting louder and he only soothes you by smothering you with kisses in your shoulder and to your neck.

"leave me alone, rin." taking a deep breath and fastening the last buttons of your cardigan.

his grip only tightens.

"i won't. you'll always be mine." he whispers before pressing a chaste kiss in your neck.

the ride back to the hotel was silent. no words were exchanged were said until you were both in the confines of your room.

how can you look at his eyes when it reminds you of rin's gaze and the betrayal. you let his own brother take advantage of you and now you're facing your consequences.

"sae, i think we should call off our engagement." you began, the tears well up in your eyes. sae needs the truth. he has the right to know. he can't spend his life with someone like you.

"and why's that?" his voice flat, his gaze not leaving you.

you bit your lip, you can't do it. shaking your head and your fingers already making it's way to remove the engagement ring.

his hand only came to pull you and your face is buried in his chest. of course, sae knows everything.

the tears came crashing down and it was soaking sae's shirt but he didn't say anything. looking back at his reflection in the windows. his teal eyes darkening for a second before it returned to normal. fucking sneak of a younger brother.

"it's fine. you were just used. i don't blame you."

"b-but.."

he only shuts you up. "don't think anything about it. only look at me." his thumb wiping the dried tears in your cheek.

his hand holding yours and admires the ring he placed in your cute, chubby finger. you were finally his. he don't care if his brother fucked you. he will always be your first and last. and his brother is just a bump on the road.

"let's get you cleaned."

bubbles formed in the top of the tub where you are currently submerged. free from your clothing and sae was too.

his hands rubbing all over your body and he can still make out the visible marks his brother left in you. although a little angry. he remained emotionless.

his teeth grazing in the surface of your skin and bites on the marks on what his brother had done to you. your body slowly relaxing and you crumble under his touch. wanting to forget rin.

that night sae ravaged you. marking you all over while you two are covered in each other's sweat. only whispering each other's name and making love like there's no tomorrow.

admiring the ring in your finger, sae remembered when he proposed to you. the gentle waves of the sea hitting the coarse, gritty sand. the sun shining its first rays of light, reflecting on the clear waters of the vastness of the ocean.

your eyes stares at him and sae thinks it's now or never. he was never been so sure in all his life and he's standing in front of you. a ring between his thumb and index finger. his lips capturing yours while he slid the ring on your ring finger.

such a beautiful moment for the two of you. the sun rising, its lights covering you both in the middle of the beach.

your head resting on his chest, blankets covering your naked body. sae twists the ring in your finger. you calling off the engagement. he's not letting that happened. there's no way his brother would get the satisfaction of you two breaking up.

after all, you were made for him and nothing else.

itoshi riku. your son with sae. a beautiful baby boy just like his father. those same teal eyes and the long lashes. his thick red-bean colored hair similar to his father. how unfair. your son almost takes all sae's features with the exception of your skin tone and you can't deny it's your child with sae.

a tear rolls in your cheek. you were blessed with a healthy baby boy. proud that you have given birth to such child and you couldn't be more happier.

but happiness don't last long. your son growing quickly and his features becoming distinct. you were reminded by your betrayal. how could you miss those dark green locks of sae's brother. a patch of dark green showing in the fringe of your son's hair.

genetics be damned. they're brothers. rin's revenge to his brother did really took root and it's in your son.

it didn't escape sae. his only response when you talked about is, "we're brothers."

his treatment to his son didn't change and to yours. you are his wife. the mother of his child and he won't let a single resemblance to his younger brother would ruin you both.

then there's the family gathering. rin who was still making his way to the football leagues caught the sight of you holding a toddler in your arms.

the child resting on your shoulder and rin couldn't deny the child or your son is a spitting image of his older brother. the hair was a dead give away and the lashes he and his brother have the same. it wasn't a surprised your child with sae's would inherit it.

his parents were ecstatic finally having a grandchild, after sae's engagement to you and before a wedding could happen. you were pregnant.

hope blossoms in rin's chest at that day. wishing the child you were carrying was his but it was still his brother. that reason still wouldn't deter him from wanting you.

your mother had been fussing why the fringe in your child's hair is clipped. answering her that it would irritate his face but your mother had just called you nonsense. removing the clip and the fringe in your son's hair broke free and rin's eyes widens.

heh. it really did take root on you. no matter how his brother would create ways to separate you two. fate would find a way for him to be with you.

an arm drapes in his shoulder. rin scowls at his brother.

"don't take satisfaction from that rin. that's my child and my wife. don't think i had forgotten what you did to her. you had your fill but it won't be happening again." sae whispers to him.

rin only looks at his brother. his brother could threaten him all he wants but he's sure.

rin will find a way again to you.

ANGEL OF MINE

ITOSHI SAE X CHUBBY READER

content warnings ─── fluff, angst if you squint, edging, smut, sae being a tease, body insecurities

notes. dedicated for @blooming-aster .

ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ sae got an angel and it's you.

sae wouldn't deny that outside of soccer, his knowledge about everything is nothing.

yet, he indulge himself with things that reminds him of home. ask him his favorite tv show, he would answer chibi maruko-chan. in which people find it odd, a prodigy like sae liking cartoons but everyone's eccentric in this world and he's allowed to like everything and he couldn't care what others would say.

soccer is his dream. soccer is his passion. sae lives in this mundane life of his where he had nothing to do but to wake up and play soccer and he thought it would be his whole life in the remaining days of his life and it doesn't prepare him when you turned his world upside down.

it took a lot for him to process that he have someone now and soccer isn't the only purpose he have in life. understanding that soccer the sport he played his whole life, poured blood, sweat and tears into it would be the only thing he believes but now when you came into his life. a new light surrounds him.

his new purpose is to love you.

it was slow. sae had said he doesn't know nothing besides soccer let alone being in a relationship. he heard his teammates about their significant others, their side chicks and their arm-candies weekly and it's different when he have you.

it took him months to adjust to be with you. to feel everything was normal. he still can't believe there was you besides him when he wakes up, your sleeping face would greet him. snoring softly, baby hairs draped into your forehead and then to your cheeks. are you for real? he would ask that sometimes.

sae thinks back, reminiscing on how you plague his thoughts every damn time. he should be focusing on his soccer. on his plays. he can't fuck things up. he needs to prove the world how he grown up, how he became the best of the best. you are just nothing but distraction and yet, you is the only thing he can think of.

after his plays, his eyes would search for you in the sea of the roaring crowds. look back and forth. turns around. pretends he's wiping his sweat but his eyes were restless. i need to see you. i want to hear you cheer for me and when he finds you waving and beaming up at him. it's like after the storm from how clear his mind was and the first rays of sun shining in his eyes. he could be blind.

he's not in love. he convinces himself. it's nothing. it would pass but it never did. it took him a long time to understand why his heart would beat faster when you're around, when he thinks of you. how his heart aches when he can see you admiring someone who isn't him. how your smile could complete his day and when you praised him, you'll be completing his month. craving for your attention when it's given free for him by the thousands and needing only yours. tell him he's the best, the one and only and this must be love.he comes in that conclusion. he's in love. definitely.

in that moment he knows, you're the right one for him amidst the crowd.

there is a invisible force about you that draws him towards you. something he never knew he would find and you have it but he never knew what was it. maybe it's the way you brighten up his days. made him feel appreciated for all the efforts he put in when nobody had. he thinks of all the possible ways what made him like you, loves you but there's no answer to it.

it was awkward when things got official. should he kiss you? would you like to hug him? hold his hand, maybe? he had no idea. sae searches in the internet. google could help him and he sees the answers so he did it. waits for your reaction when he first held your hand in his and you seem to like it. he didn't let your hand go. the first kiss? it was short and sweet. it didn't stay that like that for long though. kisses you everytime he had the chance, leaves you breathless every damn time. and hugs? sae was stiff but hugging you melts all his troubles away. where have you been all his life when you're the answer to every question he have.

the water splashed around him, dripping in the rim of the tub as he settleds down. tight muscles loosening, he finally can breathe. the steam wafts providing relaxation and sae leaned back. feel the comfort of the tub and splashes himself with the water.

he hears the bathroom door open and his breath hitched. standing in the door, you were stark naked with a bashful look in your face, hands covering the bits of your body. how long it had been since you two lived with each other and you still act like it's the first he had seen when sae albeit his stoic expression can be a little bit expressive when you're around scratch that, you bring the tiniest and the most emotions he didn't knew he have.

"stop staring." you scold him, dipping in the tub before fully submerging yourself in the warm water. thank the heavens for the big tub. when you two first moved in and started building things, arranging the furnitures, the tub is the first priority. sae agreed with you. everywhere is an intimacy, no matter where the place is. where bath times are sacred where both of you are present despite the busy schedules. the large tub bringing comfort and the spaciousness, it's fantastic. the space where both of you can fit and move freely and the extracurricular deeds occurs. it's a special place in the home you both created.

he can feel the embarrassment radiating from you even when your back facing him. sae slightly shakes his head inertly finding the demeanor you have yet to abandon cute. you weren't still comfortable with him, with your body presented to him. the water sloshing when his body moves, hands wrapping around yours and sae felt your body tensed around him. his arm in your neck while the other rests in your heavier midsection. pulling you close to press your back in his chest and he leans back to the edge of the tub.

he can feel the rapid beating of your heart. the gulps you take and the quiver of your lips. it's a second sense when sae could feel, notice the small changes in your body. this is what must feel like to be bonded to someone. to share a connection with. is this what soulmates feel but that's an old tale. there's no such things as soulmates exists in this time but sae could believe that you two are created for each other.

"relax." he murmurs, kissing your hairline, his lips nipping the shell of your ear.

"sae..." your voice a little shaky. you can't help but to bite your lip, feel his palm in the top part of your thighs, running above to your belly.

"i got you." kneading the flesh in his palm like they were made of dough. it make wonders though, you can feel yourself relaxing in his touch. your walls of doubts crumbling as sae touches you with his rough, calloused hands. your head in his chest and you look up at him. those teal eyes of his fixated in watching your flesh sink and spill in his hand. he looks at you and kisses you with care like you were such a fragile being.

fragile. the word doesn't fit you as the others with the synonyms of being small or dainty. you were built differently.

sae is the least person you think would be this so gentle to you but here he is, behind you making you feel so loved and appreciated. always made your insecurities disappear. made you feel comfortable in your own skin.

rivulets of water drip where your skins are, fingers wrinkled, sae doesn't care about that as long he's thorough in appreciating you.

sae isn't someone to notice a person let alone took interest in someone unless you're the one who's hindering his dream, in which you did.

who knows he finds you so damn attractive when he first meet you in the crowd. an acquaintance of a fellow player or teammate he didn't bother remembering the name and you're standing there and like some cliche or his tiredness from the previous match creeping up on him, time slow down for a little bit until he snaps himself. he must be crazy and his greed running rampant at that time. in his own cold approach towards someone, towards you. he got your name and phone number saved first in his phone and the rest was history.

every man has a weakness and sae have too. you. it doesn't come with too many turns. it's plain and simple. you.

one time, you were apologizing. a bit embarrassed at what will come. you're inexperienced. okay, he knows that but fuck you made him lose his mind fast. you're on top of him. a bit hesitant in putting your weight in him but damn fuck you feel so fucking good when you've sink yourself in his length. his hands holding the plushness of your waist to guide you. he lets you take control. roll your hips in a pace you can do, his gaze drinking in the sight of your breasts bouncing, your soft tummy squished and jiggling and sae had never seen such a beautiful sight. everything about you is what he needs for.

it wasn't that bad for a first experience with you taking control and sae loves control. it doesn't took too long before he leads you in the ways of pleasure and sae is a passionate lover but sae could be sometimes a tease in bed. it always ends up with you begging and tears gathering in your lashes. men with their egos and sae isn't different. there's a part inside him that feeds on the pleasure of you crying. the way your body squirms, the desperation in your movements.

"sae..." you call his name out and while he's making you lose your mind his sight darts in your face. sweat beading in your forehead and your teary gaze looking back at him. "let me cum, please.... sae....."

how could sae ignore that pleas of yours. obediently asking him for release. should he give you that? in some sick part of his thoughts think that but not yet. your velvety walls spasming around him and you're lowering yourself to meet his thrusts, hit that deepest part of yours that he can only give to you.

your mind in shambles, body writhing and there's only one thing you want. you want to cum but sae made it impossible. no matter how hard you chased your high, it's only sae. you were making efforts too but without sae it will never be enough. sae's perfect and he's so cruel to you. the first batch of tears came rolling in your sides and that was the cue for sae to give in to you. always the tears and your pouty face on display before entrusting your pleasures with his.

holding your round cheek in his palm and leans down to you. the chain of his necklace tickling your chest with it's cold and smooth texture. bestowing a sweet kiss to your lips and he smiles, feels you soften up to him. your legs locking around him and sae chuckles. the sound seems condescending but you know it's one for amusement. his needy girlfriend all for him and so then, sae gives you the sweetest pleasure he's been holding. he won't last too from you tightly wrapped around him. making sure you take what he gives.

when you both settled down, the sweat clinging both in your skins but never paid attention. legs tangled in the sheets with your jaw resting on his chest. his hand in your cheek, examining you like it held one of the wonders in the world. his sight on the bracelets you gave him. lucky charms you had told him and sae got confused why he need charms, when he have is talent and greed and he finally understand it when you gave it to him. a piece of me in your games and after that, sae couldn't let it go.

there is still many things that are left unanswered. sae recalls in what made him fall for you. he's sure you fell first or is it the other way around but nonetheless you plague him with the thoughts of you. why he couldn't easily shake you off when he's good at cutting people at his life. how you look so beautiful that it hurts him when you think you're not good for him at times but he's there to kiss away all your doubts.

grabbing your hand and you intertwined it with yours, giving him a bashful smile and pout before burying your face in his chest. you could be so bold at times. your softer hands in his and sae couldn't comprehend why it fits to him like a puzzle when you two are different and no matter how he spend his times asking for answers. there will never be an answer for it but why would it needs for an answer when in those simple times he have you. beside him.

going home wasn't so bad anymore. he will always find you waiting for him. be it in the bedroom or in the living room. how his silent days weren't dull anymore. he hears you laughing and singing even when your voice cracks. him finding solace in you and giving him a place to call home. showed him love even he's the least of deserving of it.

"everybody deserves love, sae."

and he deserves it. truly deserves it when you are the one to show him love and everyday sae falls in love with you. deeper and deeper.

How do you think the itoshi brothers would know that chubby reader is the girl they want to be with for the rest of their lives?

WANT TO BE YOURS, FOREVER

ft. itoshi brothers

content warnings ─── fluff, angst, pining, hints of proposing, marriage.

ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ they just want to spend their whole life with you.

ITOSHI SAE

it didn't come with complete honesty.

sae was in denial.

how could he spend his whole life with someone like you when he's incomplete. broken. a puppet to his own ambition with the invisible strings dangling above him. he couldn't count how many he hurt you with his own selfish ambition. fleeting promises with words of affirmation that it'll happen but it never did. sure you couldn't stay with someone like him. you're fed up with his attitude and he just waited for you to crumble. crack the words what you really want to say to him.

from the countless nights of arguments where it left unsolved, tearstained pillows who witness your pain and waking up in the morning you decided you hated his guts. no apologies and going up to start his routine and back to playing football. he tried to make it up to you. ordering your favorite takeout meal and he says nothing.

the lack of communication. where feelings can't be conveyed by staring at each other's sleeping faces.

sae wasn't built for relationships. he can't even create one for his younger brother, let alone with you and he knows it.

he just waited for you and it never comes. he still came home with food on his plate, a warm bath and you on the couch, asleep. waiting for him to come home, making time to spend with him and he seems heartless in comparison.

then in one time where you're both far away from each other. where the day never meets the night, it never does. in the other side of the planet, a sleepy call he received one night. there's a sniffle and the sound of your voice.

“i miss you, sae. goodnight and take care of yourself.”

a brief moment of peace and then you hung up. she will never miss you, a problematic asshole like yourself. sae had told himself and the call tells him otherwise. you missed him so bad just like he is and then, something warm blooms in his chest. like a matchstick igniting fire inside him. it wasn't hot, burning hot, no, it wasn't. it's like a soft glow of fire in a candle.

in that moment, where he laid in his bed that night all alone. he thinks of you. from the days where you stayed for him where he was nothing but a prick. a thorn in your side that you kept grasping no matter how it pricked and made your fingers bleed. you decided to stick with him.

love hurts.

he only realized it just now. you were hurting from just loving and accepting him for who he was. embracing his flaws and his faults for not being the best partner for you. you still accept him with open arms. you were his and he was yours. that may be enough to convince himself that you are still his and he hope he could still make it up to you.

show him the smile you always give to him. the warm hugs in his bad days and your voice soothing the damage inside him and he hopes he can still make it up to you.

luggage left in the doorstep, he finds you in the living room of your shared apartment. laying down and when you see him standing.

“welcome home, sae.”

he didn't say anything and oh, how he missed that hearing coming from your lips. he's home now and without a beat, he lays down beside you. turning into side before engulfing you in his arms in which you returned. inhaling his scent which you've missed for months.

“i love you.” he mutters, his ears turning red. he wasn't used to saying it. it's feels like the first time he said it to you and you almost cried but you only tighten your hold around him. burying your face in his chest and sae holds the back of your head.

you didn't need to say it back. sae knows how infinite your love is for him. the sacrifices and the understanding you made for him and girl like you is worth more than anything and he's not letting you go.

you both stayed at each other's embrace. sae decided to bask in the warmth of your soft, plush body. deciding to stay in that position for awhile and right now, he can only think of one thing. making it official. spend the rest of his days with you and hopefully you would accept.

in his pocket, a velvet box is tucked inside.

ITOSHI RIN

until he isn't the number one, there's no point in settling with someone. you would be a distraction, a hindrance to his dreams. he didn't need nobody in his life to achieve his goal in becoming number one. he just needed himself and that would be ever be.

and yet, he have you. rin didn't know either why you would settle someone for like him. sure, rin is aware he have the looks, he's popular to boot and that make everyone wants him but not you, you see past of it and see him. the rin itoshi who is the best at football, loves horror movies, who isn't good at calligraphy (he tries to be) and likes owls.

when he says he don't need anyone, he's lying. he needed you. he came from denying you to he needed you. you're the one who understands him. accepts him for he was. that he was flawed. he's rude at times. he's blunt and unfriendly and he's also someone who is capable of loving someone, you.

there are times when he gets frustrated at things. he still got this unsolved issues with his brother. blames himself for lacking something, that he would be always the shadow to his brother but you proved him nonetheless. he's his own person.

with your arms wrapped around his shoulders while you whisper the things he doesn't know he needed.

“it's not your fault, rin. sometimes we fall short on things we can't control. you're the best at things rin and give yourself some credit. like you're the only one who can pull off that anyone isn't capable of. only you could that and i, i'll always believe in you.”

he thinks, he'll crumble at that moment and he knew you're the right person for him. the one he'll spend his life for the rest of his life. you were nothing but being the best for him. the one that could surpass what really love means to him.

you were the breath of fresh air for him in anything. he's sunlight in his cold, dark days and the one who will love him, no matter how shitty he was and that's enough for him.

and with that moment, it's the first time he ever look at someone with adoration in his eyes. he could feel his heartbeat thumping like taps of fingers in a wooden table and he feels at ease.

he's rin itoshi and he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.

yandere kaiser & sae respond to their chubby!darling have a feelings on somebody else because of their both past where the yandere used to mock & bullies the darling's weight & appereance, please make this noncon cus i like it more darker. as if its spicier ✨

CAN'T HAVE WHAT'S MINE

ft. michael kaiser, itoshi sae

content warnings ─── degradation, history of past bullying, babytrapping, forced affection, manipulation, gaslighting.

ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ you shouldn't have dared to love someone that is not them.

MICHAEL KAISER

he was above everyone else and yet, how dare you fall for someone else who's beneath him. you, out of fall people should be grateful for him giving you the attention that many would die for.

he can't take it. not when he's the embodiment of perfection and you choose someone who's not even his equal for your attention. don't get him wrong. michael wouldn't lower his pride nor self for you but why does he sees red everytime you associate yourself and sing praises for that trash?

the familiar terror you felt and watch how your bright eyes turn lifeless brought him joy. he was glad he still have that hold over you. one touch. the tone of his voice changing into a snarl and his vein popping in his forehead. your lips tremble when his face gets nearer at you.

“i get to give you attention and you dare to ignore mine. who taught you that?” he laughs in a scornful manner. his smile wide but never reaches the eyes that is cold and seethes in betrayal at your found fondness for the other who is not him.

his grip was painful. his fingers digs at your cheeks. his palm hard as it holds your jaw in a firm manner. you look ridiculous similar to a blobfish. your round cheeks puffier from how hard he grips it. the flesh gathers in a confining state. you know from the reflection of his blue yes that you dared to meet.

“it's my own decision to choose who i want to love. your opinion does not matter in my own affairs.” you state matter of fact. biting your lips to prevent the tears from spilling from your waterline. years of being the center of the attention of his mockery and the endless degradation you received — you learned to despise him. michael kaiser is nothing to you despite with his fame and talent. you don't need someone like him in your life.

ah. you learned to talk back. it's fine. he will put you back to your rightful place like what he did years back before he is now. you will love him. worship him. offer your body and soul for him.

the pressure of his hold in your cheeks got firmer. it was starting to bruise your skin. you tried to pry his wrist off you but to no avail it was like clawing on a wall with no damage taken. michael chuckles at your attempt.

“i love him and nothing would change it.” you look at him straight in the eye and michael was unfazed by it. you were comparable to a dog resisting until being held by the scruff.

“do you?” he smirks, and then faint footsteps came nearer where you are being held by michael and then your boyfriend stumbled between you both. you were relieved by his appearance and you called his name but michael was quick to squish your cheeks harder and the position in your boyfriend's perspective finds it rather intimate yet he isn't bothered by the fact that his girlfriend is being held in a uncomfortable manner by someone.

you met his gaze. tears threatening to fall as your lips utter the word of help and that's when you thought he will come rescue you. he shakes his head. taking slow tentative steps backwards before disappearing.

he recognizes michael kaiser. the ace of bastard munchen and there is no way he will come fight or mess with him and so he ran.

“you love that cuck, huh?” the blonde taunts you. “no one can give you this kind of attention without me. be grateful, liebe.” the endearment made your stomach churn.

“i will never — ever love you!” you snarl at him and the air in your lungs got knocked out of you when he slammed you in the cold hard wall.

michael grabs your jaw. pulling him closer and his breathe is closer to you. “you will love me.” he says before crashing his lips into yours. slipping his tongue inside your mouth and claiming you as his.

you fought him. kicking your legs but michael was quick to trap you. his tattooed arm wrapped around your waist and his hand grabbing your clothed ass and giving it a firm squeeze.

“m—michael!” you managed to croak out. your hands in his chest. desperately trying to push him but he simply won't budge.

“resistance is futile. take what i give you and you will be rewarded, hmm?" he hums. grasping your chin in his fore and index finger. “you will follow me.”

forcing you to grind in his clothed thigh. he latches to your neck. sucking and biting the skin until bruise starts to bloom from it. “i will let this one slide.” he warns you, continuing his assault in your neck while his hand fondles your belly under your shirt. you let out a whimper when he squeezes the flesh in his hands.

“defy me again and you will learn the hard way.”

ITOSHI SAE

sae was never one to bother himself with distractions until he got a wind of his "childhood friend" planning to settle down with someone who is not him. of course this isn't something he would oversee. you belonged to him.

it was a headache seeing you glowing and unabashed. nothing could stop you from falling in love and show how much you adored the person you are with now.

“i just left you and this is what i come home to?” there's the passive-aggressiveness in his voice. you raised a brow at his statement. finding the words odd after just being home a few hours ago.

“a hello would be nice, sae. and what does it even mean?” you asked him curiously. unclear of the meaning behind those years and it's not like you were both close.

“you going behind my back.” his teal eyes gleaming with some unknown emotion while looking at you.

“going behind your back?” you want to laugh at him. “we're not even a thing, sae. the only thing or decent thing you had done for me was to leave. i was happy with you gone.” you bit your tongue to further stop the retaliation. the words coming more of a personal grudge against him. you didn't mean it but seeing sae after a long time just brought back the memories you desperately wanted to forget and sae is similar to a memory that randomly pops whenever a happy memory surfaces.

gone. you wanted him gone. sae is used to being trashtalked. wether it's online, personal or in the field but nothing stung like what you had said. he kept quiet. he shouldn't be acting so brash right now, not when you're within his grasp. he still have plans.

“what the hell do you think you're doing, sae!?” you screamed at him. you were in a unfamiliar place and your body is sore and heavy. your sight a bit blurry as your head spins.

“stop screaming now, won't you.” he sat at the foot of your bed. his gaze fixated in you. “i just saved you from being tied to someone you didn't want.” he says. his stare dark while he slowly crawls in front of you and the action agitated you. instinctively moving backwards until your back hits the headboard.

“you always ruin things for me, sae. i genuinely consented to be with him! not you, you fucking asshole! i love him! get that through that thick skull of yours!” you spat at him. you were about to scream again when his hand came wrapping around your neck. therefore cutting your air and the fear settles in your bones at him.

“you don't love him. i was the one who dealt with your bullshit ever since and i won't allow you to be with someone who is not me.” his eyes never leaving you while he slowly pries your creamy thighs open to accommodate him.

your cries fell into deaf ears. sae was cruel. always ways. he didn't care for anyone not even you. he only cared when it was for his own gain. he will be keeping you by his side. you will have no qualms over it and take it over and over again.

he seals your fate when he dumps his load inside you. a baby he says. just to keep you occupied. this wouldn't be more difficult if you just have set your feelings aside until he comes back but you will always be his stubborn, chubby childhood friend and you are to be with him until your last dying breath.

can u write smth for sae!!!!!!

“does it bother you that i'm your girlfriend, sae?

the older itoshi glances at his girlfriend below him. he's half-naked. his shirt already discarded moments ago and he's ready to pounce on you and the question popped. his teal colored eyes narrows down at you. a scowl in his face present at your question and you bit your lip. regretting the question. it wasn't intentional and you just blurted it out.

does it bother the itoshi sae that you are his girlfriend. the answer is no. it is that simple. no buts. no what ifs. pure and straight. no. it doesn't bother him that he's girlfriend is big despite his much leaner build than yours. he's all muscles and you're soft. he loves that for you and if it bothers him that much that you are his girlfriend, he shouldn't have asked you to be his in the first place. he got only two things in his mind. soccer and his girlfriend. the rest doesn't matter and his time is that valuable to waste it for something he doesn't want.

“good thing you're adorable.” he deadpans. a faint twitch in his lips while he reach to cup your round cheek in his palm. amused at the musings of his girlfriend below him. “no. it doesn't bother me.” he answers you and he's placing a chaste kiss to your lips and then another until his lips are moving to yours and then kissing under your chin until he got lower and lower.

“sae!” you gasped at the sensation of his hot breath fanning the inside of your thick thighs. his fingers cold making you shiver at the coldness of his fingers. “you're starting to ask stupid questions. i ought to shut you up or i get to make a use of your mouth to get it occupied. shut up and let me do my business here.” his voice cold and how could there be warmth on his voice. you ask yourself but you were literally stopped when his tongue took a long lick between your folds. your body jerking backwards and sae grips your thighs to avoid you from running away from him.

it doesn't took long for you to shut up and only call his name. chanting it over and over again while he greedily laps the juices coming out from your fat cunt. your hole weeping with need and sae is skillful with his tongue. you didn't even realize that your legs is clamping his head but sae paid it no mind. too focused and occupied to get more of that sweet juices of yours flowing from your aching hole.

it's hard to belief that one of the most valuable player of real madrid is in between your legs. licking your pussy back and forth when sae can't be bothered to smile at the cameras pointed at him. you have never seen him so satisfied not until he's in-between your legs. a man who's cravings have been satiated.

“sae, i-m cum—” your boyfriend disconnects his mouth to your sticky folds before you can cum earning a dissatisfied whine from you. “this is what you get when you ask me stupid questions.”

“so mean.” you muttered and sae doesn't missed that. “i'll show you mean.” he says and since that you never asked questions that sae seems as stupid. you learned it after being edged. crying your eyes out and begging for him to make you cum.

Turquoise Twinkle: A Day in the World of Soccer and Surprises

Chapter 10 || love unlock

The next day you somehow manga to get the school and into your class, thanks to the address in your notebook.

You took your seat and watched as all the kids played around or talked. It felt like you didn't belong here.. it was true you weren't from here.

But it still hurt. You wanted to go home, to your real home. You sighed and put your head on your desk as a way to stop yourself from crying.

"HI! Y/n chan!" Someone greeted you with a loud and cheerful voice as they took their seat beside you.

You looked up and was surprised to see the person in front of you. "what are you doing here... yumiko?" You asked confused as you saw her tilted her head sideways also confused "what do you mean?" She asked "I'm always with you right." She smiled but something about her smile was off...

Yumiko's cheerful demeanor seemed almost too perfect, her wide smile stretching a bit too far, and her laughter ringing a tad too high-pitched. As she playfully hit your head, you couldn't shake the eerie feeling that something was amiss.

"But didn't I transfer schools...?" you muttered, confusion still clouding your thoughts.

"Silly, I did too!" Yumiko chirped, but her laughter carried an unsettling undertone, leaving you with an unsettling sensation in the pit of your stomach.

You nodded in response to Yumiko's statement but chose to focus your attention on the front of the classroom, as if the blackboard held all the answers to this strange situation. Soon after, a peculiar change began to unfold.

It was as though the presence of Yumiko had cast a magical spell over your desk. Students who had previously treated you as if you were invisible started approaching, one by one. They struck up conversations, shared laughs, and included you in their discussions. It was a stark contrast to the few minutes ago when you felt like a ghost in the classroom.

This sudden shift in social dynamics left you with an unsettling and eerie feeling. It was as if the entire class had been waiting for Yumiko's arrival to acknowledge your existence, and you couldn't help but wonder why.

And so on the whole day at school went by fast and was very weird.

As you walked along the familiar path toward your home, a familiar sight caught your attention. There, on the nearby playground, you spotted Rin and Sae in their school uniforms, energetically playing a game of soccer.

A wry smile crept onto your face as you watched them chase after the ball, their laughter and shouts filling the air. "Why does everyone seem to love soccer so much?" you muttered under your breath, your voice tinged with sarcasm.

The realization dawned on you as you continued to observe the scene. "Oh right, I isekaied into a soccer otome game or manga thingy," you mused aloud, the irony not lost on you. It seemed that, in this world, soccer was a central theme, and you couldn't help but find it amusing, even if it wasn't exactly your cup of tea.

You decided to join Rin and Sae in their soccer game, thinking it might be a fun way to unwind and spend time with them. You approached the makeshift field with a playful grin, ready to kick the ball around and enjoy their company.

However, as fate would have it, the universe had different plans. Just as you were about to join in, Sae took a powerful shot at the ball, and it went flying straight toward your face. The impact was unexpected and caught you off guard, sending you tumbling to the ground.

In the blink of an eye, both Itoshi brothers sprinted toward you, concern etched on their faces. They knelt down beside you, worry in their eyes, and asked in unison, "Are you okay, Y/n?"

You groaned a little, holding your mouth where it hurts the most. You noticed the metallic taste in your mouth, you looked at your hand and noticed the blood and something else.

"Oh" the three of you noticed that one of your baby tooth had fallen into your hand.

Maybe it was you or your 9 year body but seeing the blood and the broken tooth made the Tears streamed down your face uncontrollably, a mix of pain, shock, and the sight of your own baby tooth. To your nine-year-old body, it felt like a significant loss, even though you knew it was just a part of growing up.

Rin, in his usual panic, hovered around, unsure of how to help. However, Sae stepped in with a calm and reassuring presence. He led you to a nearby water fountain and gently encouraged you to rinse your mouth, washing away the blood and calming your racing heart.

As you rinsed your mouth, Sae patted your back comfortingly and assured you, "It's okay, Y/n. It's just a tooth. This happens to everyone when they're growing up." He spoke from experience, having been through similar situations with Rin.

Gradually, the tears subsided, and your breathing returned to normal. You looked at Sae with gratitude.

"Thanks" You said while he wiped your tears away.

Rin came up to you still worried and asked "are you okay? Does it hurt?"

You gave Rin a reassuring smile and nodded. "I'm okay now. It doesn't hurt much anymore,"

Sae, although still concerned about your well-being, couldn't help but chuckle at the situation. "Well, I guess that's one way to lose a tooth," he remarked, finding the silver lining in the unexpected event.

You, on the other hand, managed to smile through the pain and slight embarrassment. "Guess so," you replied, holding the tooth carefully in your hand. "I hope the tooth fairy still visits for soccer-related incidents."

Rin and Sae shared a laugh with you at the mention of the tooth fairy. It was moments like these that made you feel even closer to them. Despite the little mishap, their presence and humor lightened the situation.

This was basically your every day things now. first spending time with yumiko in school and after school spending time with rin and sae and after do some tasks the system gave you.

Homework or study was never a problem since your mind was 17 years old and those problems were 4th grade level.

Hack you would even help sae sometime. Keyword sometime since that would either make the adults suspicious of you or would think your a genuine.. which you unfortunately were not.

That aside right now you were studying with rin and sae.. or at least was they were. You got bored.

Rin seems to have gotten stuck a question it seems, so you took a peek.

'6 × 90' was the problem it was easy for me but for him.. not so sure.

"It would be 540" I answered, Rin's eyes widened in surprise as you quickly provided the answer to the math problem. He couldn't help but smile back at you. "You're really smart, Y/n," he said, genuinely impressed by your quick thinking.

Sae, who had been focused on his own work, glanced over and chuckled. "Looks like you have your own personal tutor here, Rin."

You blushed a bit at the compliment but were happy to help. "I can even solve your one too sae!" I exclaimed, getting over excited.

"I don't think so" sae said "5th grade questions are hard unlike the 4th and 3rd grade" he smirked

Sae's playful challenge only fueled your determination. You leaned in a bit closer, a mischievous glint in your eye. "Oh, Sae, you underestimate my math prowess," you teased.

Rin watched with amusement as the two of you engaged in this friendly banter.

You sat super close to sae to see the work. You noticed him blushing and looking away but played no mind.

'4686

38421

     78

+      5'

As you swiftly calculated the answer to Sae's math problem, you couldn't help but savor the moment. You revealed your solution with a triumphant smile. "The answer is 43,190."

Sae's eyes widened in surprise, clearly not expecting you to solve it so quickly. "Wait, really?" he asked, double-checking your work. After a brief examination, he admit with a pout, "Wow, you're good."

Rin cheered you on, his face lighting up with pride. "Y/n onee-chan, you're amazing!"

You chuckled at their reactions, feeling a sense of accomplishment. "See, Sae, don't underestimate the power of a common man- I mean 4th grader!"

Sae couldn't help but pout as he admitted defeat. "Fine, fine, you got me this time, Y/n. But don't think you can beat me every time"

Rin joined in the playful banter, grinning from ear to ear. "Y/n onee-chan, you're pretty awesome!"

You laughed, enjoying the light-hearted atmosphere. "Well, I do my best! Now, what's next on the study agenda, gentlemen?"

With renewed energy and a sense of camaraderie, the three of you continued your study session, turning it into a delightful game of wits and laughter.

This time you were invited to rin ans Sae's soccer game. Going to their school was exciting since their school was far more bigger than yours.

The was game was good, itoshi bros won of course. But what catch your attention was a little boy crying from the losers team.

"Ah hentai protagonist hair is crying so hard" you muttered to yourself.

ᴺᵉʷ ᵗᵃˢᵏ

ᴹᵃᵏᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᶜʳʸⁱⁿᵍ ᵏⁱᵈ ʰᵃᵖᵖʸ

[ᴬᶜᶜᵉᵖᵗ] [ᵈᵉⁿʸ]

Reading the message you sighed. You shouldn't have looked his way.. clicking on accepted, you went towards him while thinking of a way to make him happy.

"Hey there," you began, trying to sound as friendly as possible. "Tough game, huh?"

The boy turned to you, his teary eyes widening in surprise as you approached. "Yeah," he mumbled, sniffling slightly.

"It's okay we have ups and downs in our life all the time" you tried to comfort him as You gently reached out and lifted his chin, using your thumb to wipe away a few of his lingering tears. As you did, you couldn't help but notice something remarkable—his eyes. They were a stunning shade of Turquoise reminding you of ocean.

"Wow," you couldn't help but whisper in awe. "You have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen."

The boy blinked, taken aback by your unexpected compliment. His cheeks reddened slightly, and he gave a small, hesitant smile. "You think so?"

You nodded earnestly. "Absolutely. Your eyes are like gems. You should be proud of them."

He seemed to brighten up a bit, his confidence growing. "Thanks," he replied, his voice a bit steadier. "I guess I do have pretty cool eyes."

"That's the spirit," you encouraged, giving him a warm smile. "Remember, even when things get tough, you've got something special that makes you stand out."

You couldn't shake the feeling of piercing stares burning into the back of your head as you conversed with the boy. Unbeknownst to you, the Itoshi brothers watched intently, their eyes fixed on you like hawks on prey. The intensity of their gazes was palpable, sending a shiver down your spine.

"I can feel the stares of the Itoshis," you gulped inwardly, but you dared not look behind to confirm your suspicion. Instead, you focused on the task at hand, trying to help the crying boy feel better.

As the conversation continued, you reached into your pocket and pulled out a small, brightly wrapped candy. With a friendly smile, you offered it to him. "Here, take it!"

The boy's eyes lit up with surprise and delight as he accepted the candy. "Thank you!" he exclaimed, his voice filled with genuine gratitude.

With that, you left the boy, not knowing the how much of a big impact you did on thus little boy named 'ikki niko.'

Bonus:

"What were you doing with that boy from the another team??" Sae's voice carried a tinge of jealousy as he questioned your interaction with the boy from the opposing team. His protective instincts flared, and he couldn't help but feel a bit possessive.

Rin, on the other hand, unleashed a fierce, silent glare in the direction of the little boy, his expression an unspoken warning to anyone who dared to approach you. His protective nature matched Sae's intensity, making it clear that they both held a special place for you in their hearts.

"Well, I was just trying to help," you replied, trying to explain yourself to the Itoshi brothers. The way they were reacting almost made it seem like you had committed a crime by comforting a crying kid.

Sae crossed his arms, still wearing a somewhat annoyed expression. "Helping the enemy, huh?"

Rin, not one to mince words, chimed in, "Y/n onee-chan, you're too kind. But remember, we're the good guys here!"

You couldn't help but chuckle at their possessiveness and sense of rivalry, even in such a trivial situation. "Don't worry, guys. I'm on Team Itoshis all the way."

Sae and Rin exchanged a satisfied glance, their jealousy momentarily appeased by your declaration. It seemed that, even in the midst of an ordinary soccer game, your presence had a way of stirring up emotions in the Itoshi brothers.

As both of the brothers pulled you toward their school, you couldn't help but think, 'I have to be careful with those two. They're starting to look like potential yandere characters...'

You chuckled softly to yourself, finding the situation both amusing and slightly unnerving.

Istg this is becoming more of a rin x reader x sae- 💀 can't help it they are my favorites 😭 don't worry I will try to quickly get on with the blue lock timeline 🐧