I Did NOT Need To Be Called Out Like This Tonight

I did NOT need to be called out like this tonight

Normal HS fans: Kankri is just meant to be a parody of obnoxious 2014-era Tumblr SJ bloggers, it's not that deep

Neurodivergent HS fans who saw themselves in Kankri and have projected their experiences being ND onto him to create a fully realized, nuanced version of Kankri in their head:

Now I’m gonna think about this every day

full credit to @borderlinecronus for the idea

I rest my case

[Top pic is a clip of Eret from the Dream SMP War Animatic by SAD-ist on YouTube and bottom pic is of Vriska that’s from Pesterquest]

I’m literally crying why are all the reblogs on this so funny

the lowblood alpha trolls are just the scooby gang like rufioh = fred damara = daphne kankri = velma mituna = shaggy meulin = scooby doo

Ok ok but hear me out:

Fuschia Techno

I fucking hate it here-

Now I'm thinking abo-

It's 3:30 am. I should be asleep-

DTSMP HOMESTUCK AU BECAUSE MY BRAIN WON'T SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT

(So far)

Humans:

Niki

Tubbo

Tommy

Wilbur

Trolls:

Dream - Lime (He do be in hiding doe...)

George - Cobalt

Sapnap - Bronze

Bad - Rust

Skeppy - Teal

Techno - Also Rust but *will* kill a highblood (unless you have any other suggestions)

Eret - Purple or Indigo or whichever name you want to call it

Quackity - Blue

Undecided:

Karl

Phil

CW: Schlatt

AHAHAHAH WAIT SCHLATT IS ABSOLUTELY A FUCKIN' FUCHIA LMFAO

Who Would Win in a Fight

Me vs MCYT

Tommy:

-100% chance of victory

-yes he's tall but I don't think he's ever been in an actual fight

-also he's clumsy

-easy victory

Tubbo:

-80% chance of victory (if we do fight)

-I don't want to fight Tubbo he seems cool

-again probably doesn't have much fight experience

-i would end up having to fight both Tubbo AND tommy bc of course tommy would jump in

-Big Crime might curbstomp me though

Technoblade:

-75% chance of victory (controversial but let me explain)

-tall yes but this man spends so much time gaming that his body is probably slowly breaking down

-he probably would let me win out of laziness but in the off chance he decides to start an anime training arc I'm getting destroyed

Wilbur Soot:

-25% chance of victory

-might let me win to get it over with

-is significantly taller than me so he could just step on me

-seems like he has internalized rage but so do i

-there is no winner vs loser it's whoever survives

Jschlatt:

-0% chance of victory

-he would push me down the nearest flight of stairs before the fight even started

Quackity:

-0% chance of victory

-i would sacrifice myself so he would automatically win

Dream:

-5% chance of victory

-we've seen his body and we know he's tall this is a definite loss for me

-his florida man vibes give him a 10% damage boost

-might attract the rest of the dream team to come watch and then they would make fun of me and I would lose just from the stress

Sapnap:

-30% chance of victory

-he sets off my fight instincts I want to beat him up so bad

-we know he's run from the cops but so have I so in terms of speed we are probably equal

-idk I just don't think I'm winning but I would still enjoy the experience

George:

-50% chance of victory

-i don't want to fight George

-he seems more likely to run away than to fight but that just means I would have to chase him down

-i feel like one quick hit to the knees and he's on the ground

BadBoyHalo:

-0% chance of victory

-he just has to shoot me

-i feel like this is self-explanatory

Skeppy:

-0% chance of victory

-BBH would come help him and then boom I've been shot