Were Gonna Be Ok Btw

we’re gonna be ok btw

Gave into capitalism and got Spotify Premium and heard Face album without ads for the first time and godddd jimin and pdogg r geniuses!!

The album starts with pure anger in face-off where he is right off the situation and can’t think past the anger and betrayal. Then it transitions o the interlude: dive where he literally dives into all the memories- his time on stage, going in and out panic (the deep breaths) and all the things he missed and cherishes. From there it goes to like crazy which is the epitome of denial (“I wanna stay in this dream”) after the aftermath of recollecting all the memories. He just wants to stay on stage, and numb all pain, just relive the good parts. Then it transitions to alone, where he’s in depression stage (“said I was okay but I feel like I’m losing myself little by little”), but eventually throughout the song he accepts the sadness (“make it right, it’s gonna be alright”). Then finally the album moves to set me free where he is… finally free.

Chills. Literal chills.

Sweet Nothing with Shua

pairing: Joshua x reader

tags: angst, fluff at the end, boyfriend Joshua, non-idol!au, mentions of childhood issues and disordered eating

summary: Graduation just got over and you’re all but happy. You watch as each of your friends leaves and as you leave. Change has never been easy for you, especially when it triggers all the instability of your childhood. But there is one person you will always find yourself coming back to- Joshua. After three years of navigating life and university together, he's your home. And now you get to literally come home to his sweet nothings in your new house and your heart will heal itself from the pains of life.

wordcount: 1.9k

a/n: Inspired by the lines "Outside, they're push and shoving, You're in the kitchen humming, All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing" from Taylor Swift's Sweet Nothing.

masterlist | Let me know your thoughts and feedback.

Change, it was a rude temptress. It lures you in with the promise of shiny places, bright lights and adventures. It’s a hoax. It takes you to uncomfortable, odd places with random strangers that make you miss home.

Change takes your closest friends away from you.

Change is the reason you're walking back home on a cold unfamiliar path, toward a driveway you don't immediately recognise and to a house currently filled with cardboard boxes.

Life had turned around in less than a month's time. You'd known it would change, you had all been preparing for it. Yet none of you were ready for the real thing. Even when you had sat through every packing session with your friends-some packing things into a suitcase, some in cardboard boxes, talking through a million memories and making promises of holding on.

You watched as your friend group, the one that had fit perfectly like pieces of a puzzle slowly began drifting away. Except now each of you carried a part of the others' pieces too. Some moving seas away, some moving just far enough that it still feels like uncharted territory.

You had told yourself you would be brave about this. You would not let this affect you and trigger all the childhood issues attached to it. For the most part, you held onto your words. You'd cleared your dorm and moved bunches of cardboard boxes to a new and unfamiliar place. You had said your greetings to unfamiliar faces, in a stiff outfit at your new place of work. You said goodbyes to two of your closest friends at the airport in the span of a week, without breaking into a single tear.

But the emotional baggage had come out in other ways. In a cowardly move, you began pushing away your boyfriend. The one you had moved in with just weeks ago. The same boyfriend who had helped you through multiple hard times in the three years of university, all with his polite smile and kind heart. The very thought of his kindness made you hurt with guilt. He did not deserve the pain you were putting him through, especially when you both were supposed to be celebrating this fresh and beautiful chapter of your relationship. That is why you stop five steps in front of the new apartment that now belonged to the two of you, looked at his car in the driveway and decided to turn back and take another walk around the block. You needed to clear your head so that you could stop hurting him.

Shua watches from the kitchen window as you turn around and walk away. He leans back on the cabinet and rubs his eyes with his hands. He has tried everything to comfort you and give you the space you needed. He understands that this has been a hard time for you, it has been for him too. He's had to say his own goodbyes and adjust to new places too.

Joshua understands better than anyone else just how hard this might be for you. He also knows that he can't make this right or tell you to process your emotions in a different way. But it is breaking his heart to see you hurt yourself in the process. He's been waiting for a whole week to hear you say more than three words at once. He has had to sit in front of you and watch you refuse every bite of food for a week and it breaks a piece of him every time.

He has been trying his best to help you, from beside and from afar. It felt unfair to him too but he knows this has been triggering all the issues from your childhood and your pushing him away had nothing to do with your relationship at the moment.

Joshua sighs another time, he should not let himself get sucked in his insecurities too. He knows you will come back to him, he knows you will tuck yourself into his arms in sleep like you do every night. And he knows he will pull himself away before you wake up so that you don't feel more guilty than you already do. Till your guilt and pain are ready to be let out, Joshua will wait on the sidelines and remind you that he is still there and your life will continue.

The smell. That is the first thing you notice when you enter the house an hour after deciding to walk around the block. You got sidetracked at the park and ended up staring at trees as you processed everything. You now felt it all but also felt too numb. The emotions and thoughts had gotten too much and you desperately needed to cry in the comfort of your home. That's why you walked back to find Joshua.

You still remember the first time you let yourself cry in his arms after a very painful call with your dad and how he'd held you delicately through it all. He was the first person you had cried in front of since your parent, and it felt good. To finally be held as you broke down, to be reminded that you aren't entirely broken. It felt like home when he hugged you so tight that your heart healed itself.

With tears brimming in your eyes as you look around the dimly lit house, unable to move from the doorstep, the smell gets to you. It smelt like chocolate and flour. You couldn't quite place the smell but you knew someone had baked something and something had definitely burnt at least once. You looked around the living room but all you could hear was a faint hum.

You walked toward the kitchen and a silhouette came into view. Joshua standing, with his back to you, working on something on the counter as hums a song like an angel. He was wearing your old pastel pink apron around his waist, you could see multiple stains on his plain white t-shirt. You smiled as you saw how ruffled his hair was and there was definitely flour on the strands. The smile on your face forms automatically and so do the tears.

It hits you in a wave, the realisation that no matter how hard everything else in the world gets, and how many things change, Shua is here in your shared kitchen, humming as he tries his best to bake you muffins. That's all you need. That's everything he needs- the sweet nothings. The whole world can push you and hurt you, but you'll find yourself in Shua's arms, doing nothing and feeling the joy of everything.

The tears are now pouring like a monsoon rain down your cheeks and you take three big steps before tapping him on the shoulder.

Shua is startled by the sudden tap on his shoulders and he turns with the whisk still in his hands from the mess of a muffin he was desperately trying to make- for the second time that evening. He's even more surprised when he sees you pull him into an embrace. He stays still hands open wide, a whisk dripping chocolate sauce in one hand, as he watches you hold to him so tight he could barely breathe. He stayed still, feeling your sniffs against his chest, your tears soaking up his shirt.

Shua moves very slowly to place his hand around you such that he is cradling your head. He rubs circles on your scalp as you lean into him further and cry your heart out. His heart clenches as he cannot bear to see you so worn down and hurt, but another part of him is glad you chose to come back to him and let out your emotions. Shua understands that with love comes a lot of pain and he cannot expect it all to be gone just because the two of you are in love. All he wants is for the two of you to always come running back to the other when everything and everyone else makes life hard.

You cry till you can't physically anymore. The two of you stay there the entire time, unsure of the time. After you broke out into full-blown sobs, you feel tear drops dampen your hair, you know Shua was tearing up too. He always did. Neither of you could stand the other crying.

So you both stayed there, crying out the pain- the pain of growing up, of moving on, of letting go, of facing your demons, of looking at the start of your life, of an uncertain future and the fear of losing. Shua and you held each other through the fears, a promise to hold on and help each other heal. To hold each other through the storms, the soul deconstructors and through the trials and tribulations of life.

You finally feel lighter and pull yourself back to see his face. Shua is already looking down at you with his sweet smile and eyes that light up your soul. his hair is messy with flour tangled between strands and you finally notice the whisk that has been dripping chocolate sauce all over the kitchen floor and is thoroughly drenched in your tears and chocolate stains.

"Hi." Your voice comes out in a croak and both of you end up cracking up.

"Hello to you too ma'am." He says, his honey-like voice filling up the cracks of your heart.

"You're making something?" You ask feigning innocence as he gives you an embarrassed smile scratching his hair.

"I was trying to bake muffins."

You let out a small smile, "For me?"

He nods and you feel your eye tear up a little more. Shua's eyes widen with worry.

"Babe no. Don't cry. I can clean this all up and maybe we can order real muffins. Or whatever you need. Please don't cry again, my heart can't take it. And your eyes will certainly not be able to take anymore crying." He says in such a state of pure fright and panic that it endears you wholly.

You shake your head, laughing. "No Shua I am not crying don't worry."

"Thank god."

"But I think we should try to salvage these muffins and clean the kitchen." He nods looking around the mess he has made.

"And maybe you should change your t-shirt first." You say as you try your best not to stare at his drenched shirt, sticking to him in all the right places.

Shua smirks, "Oh why babe, is it tempting you?" He asks knowing full well the answer.

You roll your eyes as a blush creeps up your cheeks, "Oh, please it's nothing new."

He hums and strokes a finger across your cheek, "Uh-huh. Is that why you're red as a tomato."

You mock glare at him and pull away from his touch. "If that's how you want to play it, then I'm gonna leave you to clean this mess on your own." He groans. "And, you will sleep on the couch tonight." You add and he looks terribly scared now that it makes you grin.

"Alright alright, let's order good food, clean this up and head to bed." He says and pulls you into an embrace which you graciously acept.

"Thank you." You hear him murmur and look up at his face questioningly at him.

"For coming back to me." He says with a sweet smile and you lean forward to kiss him in response.

As if you would go anywhere but home.

I’ve been collecting bt21 keychains from places I visited with my friends as a memorabilia and I couldn’t find cooky for months and I finally ordered it…

And I got a JIMIN PHOTOCARD with it 🥹🥹🥹💜💜😭😭😭💜💜🥹🥹

I’m crying… not kidding I’m crying😭😭😭

Tiny mimi who saved my life 🥹💜 my angel, my penicillium who saved me 😭💜💜

In the Night | Mingyu Drabble

tags: fluff, just pure fluff, college boyfriend Mingyu, non-idol!au

Not proofread!

masterlist | Let me know your thoughts and feedback.

You’ve known Mingyu for less than three months. The two of you met accidentally as you tried to grab the same textbook from the uni library and ended up studying together for a class you hadn’t realised you had together.

Mingyu was everything you have looked for in a guy- he’s soft, careful, funny, respectful, emotionally intelligent and hot, oh so hot! You knew since day 1 that it was a steep slope falling for him and it took you all your energy to stop yourself.

Every morning you’d give yourself the biggest pep talk about not falling for this giant little puppy of a man and he would say or do something that would make your heart flip into fifteen different pieces. A gentle “are you okay” when he can see you stressed out or a thoughtful donut he gets you if he knows you’ve been working hard. Even the way he shyly accepts you’re lunch when you bring extra for him has you’re heart melting. And when he cooks for you, you’re heart explodes into a million pieces and only his food can piece it back together to form a beautiful rose in place of the thorns you had in your heart.

Mingyu was right, the both of you were right. But you didn’t know if he knew this. You didn’t want to assume he knew this. Mingyu openly gives love to all his friends, you’ve seen it countless times. He just was a loving person. So it was very easy to assume you read the signs all wrong.

That’s why you did all you could to keep your heart and head in check. After the first month there was no denying that you’d fallen for him, it was pointless to lie to yourself. But you still tried you level best to keep the little infatuation in check (you failed but you want to be in denial about that for as long as possible).

Repeating the “Mingyu might only see you as a friend” mantra has worked till now, pretty well. But it is slowly failing you, especially today, as you both sit on the bench near the pier watching the Han river and the Seoul city skyline. As the sun sets and the chilly winds take its place along with the pink violet hues of the sky, Mingyu slowly shifted from his initial position on the other end of the bench to sitting close enough for your shoulders to brush.

“I’m cold.” Was his excuse and honestly you were slightly cold too and did not mind the warmth emanating from him at the moment.

You find yourself sighing at the peaceful sight in front of you. From your peripheral vision you can see Mingyu’s mouth curved in a pretty soft smile. You liked it when he looked peaceful and at that moment he looked legitimately ethereal.

Mingyu moving closer to you unleashed a confidence you’ve been suppressing for months. You give into the bliss of the view and slowly lean on him. You didn’t realise what you’d done until you feel your head touches his shoulder. It feels warm. You can feel the bones and muscles beneath his jacket when you lay your head.

You stay still for a couple seconds, gauging his reaction. He doesn’t move, in fact he is stiff as stone for a whole minute. A big part of your head if balding like a police siren but your heart feels good.

One minute or an eternity passes, the concept of time is not your priority now. But after a few beats you feel it. The muscular arm that comes around your shoulder. The hands that pause a second above your shoulder and eventually is placed there. The warmth that coursed through your body when you’re slowly pushed further into Mingyu’s chest.

Then you hear him sigh-not a painful, tried sigh of exhaustion but one of pure content. The smile that forms on your face feels as natural as breathing.

Mingyu and you have spent a lot of time together in the last three months- in the same physical space and otherwise too. But you’ve never been close physically. A random side-hug here and a handshake there when you meet or part ways for the day was the usual physical contact.

This was a domain neither of you’d planned on exploring and it felt good. It felt surprisingly amazing considering you’ve never been one for physical contact. In all of your existence you’ve never initiated or accepted physical contact from anyone expect your mother. This felt new.

New, exciting and comforting.

You expected your heart to race in a million directions but for once it felt like you’re heart was home.

“Thank you.”

Mingyu’s voice comes out so softly and silent that you almost miss it. You try to lean back and turn to look at him but he holds you still with his arms. You crane your neck to look at him, doing your best to contain the smile and blush creeping up your cheeks.

“For what?”

He looks down at you, his eyes glistening glimmering like re beautiful night sky filled with a thousand stars.

“For trusting me enough to be… here.” He looks at his arms around you and back at your face. You can see the tinge of red on his face too. He’s definitely biting on his inner cheek to stop himself from smiling like an idiot.

But when you smile at him fully he also breaks into a full shy and happy smile.

This makes you take the leap. And so in an instant you throw your hands around his neck and he is thrown aback. But mingyu is smart enough to come back to senses immediately and move his hands to your waist as he slowly pulls you into his lap.

The sensible part of your brain is screaming that it’s a public space and this is Mingyu and you might’ve just ruined your friendship. But tonight you choose to be an idiot. So does Mingyu apparently.

The both of you stay in the embrace for a couple the. You soaking in his scent and warmth, and him breathing you in.

He pulls back to look at your face. He studies your face and the blush that creeps up on your face make you close your eyes out of embarrassment.

“Hey, look at me.” He says as he lifts your chin up with one finger and you open your eyes to see him.

Mingyu smiles, you smile.

“Hi.” He sounds breathless.

“Hi.” You’re voice drips of anticipation and shyness

“Is this real?” He looks nervous. You chuckle as he bites into his lips.

“It is for me.” His grip on your waist gets slightly tighter and you’re flush against him. Holding your breath as you wait for his verbal response.

“Took you long enough.”

Mingyu laughs and it reverberates in your soul.

“Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this in public…” you suggest meekly. You’re scared he’s going to think you are a pervert and moving too ahead of yourself.

“Yeah sure.” Mingyu smiles his million-dollar smile. “Don’t worry, we can do this however we want it. No pressure.”

His words make you want to cry because how can one human be so understanding and kind. But instead you smile and give him a tight hug before you get up and offer your hand to him.

Mingyu beams at you from his place on the bench, his eyes are wet now.

“Is everything alright Gyu?”

“Never better angel.”

What are organs for if they don’t melt at everything this gorgeous, kind golden retriever of a man says and does!

Phil Dunphy and Claire Dunphy forever

Who are your fictional parents??

I'll go first- Cardan Greenbriar and Jude Duarte