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Unexpected (Alfie Solomons X Fem!OC) Part 1.

Unexpected (Alfie Solomons x Fem!OC) Part 1.

Unexpected (Alfie Solomons X Fem!OC) Part 1.

Alfie Solomons x Rose Coldwell (oc) Masterlist

Summary: At the age of 39, retired in Margate and blind in one of his eyes, the last thing Alfie was expecting was a new human being in his life. Fate, apparently, has other idea.

Warnings: Mentions of suicide (very, veeeeery vaguely) || Fluff, I guess.

Words: 2.6 k.

A/N: The idea was to post this after two fics. I mean, the idea was to follow a chronological order, but my mind decided to not follow the thing I wanted to do 🤷‍♀️ .

Unexpected (Alfie Solomons X Fem!OC) Part 1.

1927.

"You can't keep me here any longer, Alfie."

"Yes, I can."

Alfie's arms wrapped around her body tighter. Even when his eyes were closed, he could feel her smile against his neck. Rose had been trying to get up for about an hour, but the warm bed as opposed to the cold winter outside had made it impossible for her to start her day. That and Alfie. Especially Alfie. Normally affectionate with her, that morning he seemed to be twice as affectionate.

Since Alfie had retired, the days the couple spent were much quieter. They deserved it, much more so after the shot Thomas Shelby fired at Alfie. The days following that moment were a nightmare for her.

Rose had been angry with Alfie when she found out about the plans with the Italians. Arguments in the couple had been dozens over nearly 20 years of marriage, it was inevitable especially considering his personality. But no quarrel was like when Rose learned that Alfie had made a deal with Luca Changretta. Neither had spoken to each other for two days. Unfortunately, that's when Tommy Shelby almost killed Alfie. Nearly two decades married, ruined by a bullet and Rose guilt-ridden that she'd been angry with him. And she was right to be, but if Alfie hadn't survived, she would never have forgiven herself. Alfie was her world, no matter how angry she had been. Fortunately, Alfie was stubborn even when it came to death and was still with her, as he had always been.

"Unlike you, Al, I have a job."

"And a husband too. And your husband, right? He wants nothing more than cuddles in bed."

"My husband is nothing but a teddy bear," Rose said, kissing him briefly before finally getting up. "I can't stay, Alfie, I have a meeting. I should have been up half an hour ago."

"You should think about retirement too, luv. Nothing but the two of us and the beach…and the bed." Alfie propped himself up on his elbows to look at her. "Is it absolutely fucking necessary for you to go today?"

"It is. You'll be fine, Alfie. You have Cyril to keep you company and I'll be back before dark. And for two weeks there will be no need for me to go anywhere. So…" Rose finished fixing her hair and went over to kiss Alfie, "Do you want something from town?"

Alfie shook his head. "Take care of yourself, yeah?"

"I'll be fine, don't worry. I love you."

'"Me too."

Alfie lay back down on the bed as he saw Rose walk out the bedroom door, but before he could settle in, he heard a yell. With no time to put on footwear, Alfie moved as fast as his body and back would allow.

And his gun had been left on the nightstand. Alfie cursed not knowing what was happening.

He found the front door wide open and came to see Rose running towards the beach.

"What the hell...?" Then he saw what had captured Rose's attention. "Fuck me."

.

It was supposed to be a day like any other in the life of 22-year-old Dorothy Brown. Or so she told Allie Brown, her three-year-old daughter. They decide to go to the beach despite the winter weather. Dorothy loves her daughter with all her heart.

Allie was the product of a relationship between Dottie and a man who claimed to love her but left her when Dorothy was four months pregnant. She never saw him again. Fortunately, when Allie was born she was the spitting image of Dorothy, there was nothing of the man in the girl's face. Both with light brown hair the color of a walnut shell and gray eyes like the sea in front of them on that winter morning.

Dorothy has studied the area for several months. She knows that a wealthy married couple lives in that house. Without equivocation, Dottie estimates that neither of them is yet forty years old and she has never seen children there, only a large brown dog. Dorothy has seen the couple interact with each other. She knows, though she has never experienced it, that is love. That couple loves each other blindly, it's obvious.

Allie doesn't know why they are at the beach even though it's cold. Isn't the beach only in summer? Her teddy bear Ms. Boo is well protected in her arms. Dottie makes her daughter sit down. She covers her with a blanket she has brought.

"Ms. Boo, are you okay?"

"She's cold," the little girl replies.

"Then she needs to be covered up too," Dottie smiles as her daughter also wraps her teddy bear.

She loves, loves her daughter, which is why she makes Allie sit in the sand in front of the rich couple's house. Dottie can't take it anymore. She's alone, desperate and can't give Allie what she deserves.

"If someone asks what your name is, what will you say?"

"My name is Allie."

"That's right, Allie. I love you, you know?" Dottie tries not to cry in front of her daughter, but she can't help it. She knows she will be okay, she knows, but it hurts. "Mommy loves you."

"I love you too, Mommy. Why are you crying?"

"Because I know you'll believe having beautiful things. Because you'll be happy, yes? Mommy will go to the sea now. But you stay there, okay? I'll take a swim in the sea and then we'll go home and eat cupcakes. Don't move, Allie. You have to promise."

"I promise."

Had she been older, maybe only two years older, Allie would have known that in winter the sea is cold as ice. But at three years old, Allie has barely stopped being a baby. Her mother kisses her on the forehead gently, like when they go to sleep, and then walks to the sea.

Dottie cries. But there is no suffering where she goes and Allie will be happy. Twenty-two-year-old Dorothy Brown enters the sea, never to leave it.

.

Rose ran across the sand. Shoes were just a hindrance at that moment, she took them off without stopping running. With her heart pounding, Rose finally arrived in front of the girl.

When she opened the door seconds before, she thought that lump in the sand was trash. Or something someone had thrown away. But when the lump moved and Rose saw the girl, she ran to her. Thousands of questions in her head. What was such a little girl doing on an empty beach in the middle of winter?

Finally she reached her side. Careful not to startle her, Rose crouched down to look at her. Alfie, finally, arrived seconds later as well.

"Sweetheart? What are you doing here?" asked Rose. The girl's hands were icy cold, but she didn't look frightened. "What's your name?"

"Allie."

"Hi Allie, I'm Rose and this is my husband, Alfie."

The girl raised her head to look at him. The scar on the man's face made her curious, but she only greeted him.

"How do you do, Allie," Alfie said, glancing briefly at his wife.

"Tell me, Allie, what are you doing here. Are you alone?"

"I came with my mom. She said she was going to the sea for a swim, but she's not back yet."

"To the sea?" Alfie asked "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I saw her."

"Fuck me…" Alfie and Rose looked at each other, this time longer. They both knew what that meant. The raging, cold sea, it spared no one.

"I've got an idea, Allie. That's our house over there, we'll go in there I'll give you some hot food and we'll wait for your mom there," Rose said, taking the girl by the hand. "Is that your teddy bear?"

"Yes, her name is Ms. Boo."

"Ms. Boo is very cute. I'm sure she wants something warm to eat, too. Do you like dogs, Allie?"

"Yes!"

"We have a dog. He's big, probably bigger than you, but he's gentle and good. Don't be scared when you see him."

The little girl shook her head "What's his name?"

"Cyril."

Behind them, Alfie walked more slowly. He picked up Rose's shoes that had fallen by the wayside. From his own experience Alfie knew that every day was a new opportunity for life to surprise them, but a toddler on a beach and in front of his house in the middle of winter was just too unreal.

Rose made the little girl some hot chocolate and Alfie gave her a jar of cookies he had baked the night before. Clearly the girl was starving. While Allie ate and Cyril went over to see who that little creature was, Alfie and Rose were talking in the living room.

"We have to call the police," Rose said, as she peeked into the kitchen to check on Allie.

"We can't call the fucking police! Everyone thinks I'm dead and it's just as well! We have to find another solution."

"There is no other solution, Alfie!" she lowered her voice, "clearly the mother committed suicide in the fucking sea!"

"I know! And the inept cops aren't going to find her!"

"Fucking hell, what are you suggesting then? Holding a minor is illegal. This child must have a father! Or a grandfather, someone else!"

"Let's call your brother." Alfie put a hand on his wife's shoulder "clearly we can't alone and he's a professional."

.

Rose didn't know what to do. At that hour she would have to be meeting in a women's committee, but that had changed. And Rose, who prided herself on having everything, or almost everything, under control now didn't know what to do.

As Alfie went to call Samuel, her brother, Rose returned to the kitchen. Allie was playing with Cyril and her teddy bear. The little girl smiled at her when she saw her.

"The cocoa was yummy," she said.

"Well, Allie, I'm glad you liked it, I'll make some more later. Can I ask you something?"

"Yes."

"When your mom went swimming in the ocean, did she say anything to you?"

Allie paused to think, "Only that she loved me. She was crying."

Rose forced a smile "I'm sure she was. You're a good girl, she sure loves you."

What would drive a mother to do that? Rose wasn't judging, but it was also hard to understand.

"What about your dad? Does he live with you?"

"I don't have a dad. Mommy told me he went on a trip before I was born. I just live with my mom."

Rose clenched her jaw in fury. Men. Over the years she'd been in the women's movement, first as a suffragette and then as a militant, she'd heard aberrant things and men abandoning pregnant women was one of the most frequent stories.

"So it's just you and your mom."

"Yep. She's coming soon?"

Rose not knowing what to say just nodded and put a hand on the girl's head.

"Cyril is funny," she commented.

"He is! Cyril is a great dog," Rose affirmed. "He likes you! How old are you, Allie?"

The girl held up three fingers. Rose smiled at her again. Three years old and an orphan. The father may have been alive, but after more than all that time only God knew where he was. And if he was found, he clearly wouldn't be interested in the girl.

.

Rose had taken the little girl into the living room where she was drawing sitting on the rug in front of the fire and surrounded by sheets of paper and several pencils.

"She's three years old," Rose told Alfie. "And she doesn't have a father. Or she does, but he left, leaving the mother pregnant. Allie said her mother told her 'he went on a trip'."

"Maybe he died and the mother didn't know how to tell her…"

"Alfie…" she raised an eyebrow. "Those kind of men are just a piece of shit. I wouldn't be surprised if Allie's mother was really young and innocent, believing promises of undying love that the guy made just to sleep with her. And when that happened and she got pregnant, the guy left. Samuel got back to you?"

"Yes, but he can only come at sunset. That means we have several hours yet."

"We can't leave Allie like this. She needs something warmer and we don't have anything for kids here. I'll go into town. You stay with her. I'll make it quicker."

"You'll let me babysit?"

"Learn new skills, Al," Rose chuckled. "She's a good kid."

Rose walked over to Allie would just go into town to buy things and be right back. The girl nodded, she didn't know who those two people were but they had been nice to her and had a nice dog. She was sorry she had to get out of there, once her mother got back. Rose gave Alfie a quick kiss, before grabbing the car keys and leaving.

.

"I drew Cyril," said the little girl to Alfie, long minutes later in which she remained sitting on the floor and Alfie in his armchair.

"Is that so? Let me see."

The childish drawing of Cyril looking like he had five legs instead of four legs and a tail made the man laugh. "It's very beautiful. If Cyril could talk he would say he likes it very much."

A smile lit up the babe's eyes, then she moved even closer to him, curious "what happened to your face."

'A cunt shot me' was not an answer to give a three year old girl, so Alfie thought of just the right words to explain.

"An accident."

"Does it hurt?"

"No, not anymore," Alfie looked at Allie, who was looking at him with curious eyes. "Is there anything else you want to know?"

"Is my mommy all right? She never leaves and now it seems like she's long gone."

"Although I don't know your mother, I do think she's fine. Do you know her name?"

She shook her head "Ok, never mind."

To Alfie's surprise, Allie raised her arms and with ease, he picked her up and sat her on his lap. The little girl's gray eyes, fixed on his "What if Mommy doesn't come back?"

"Why wouldn't she come back?"

"Dunno. She always talks about people sometimes going to Heaven. Maybe she had to go there."

Alfie made a mental note that Allie was smarter than he imagined. Considering that surely, only a year ago she had begun to speak more fluently.

"Do you think she's in Heaven? If she's there, she can't come back,"

"It's okay. She told me everything's nice there."

"So they say…"

"I'm going to miss her," Allie pouted and Alfie hugged the girl, tucking her against his chest. He also took a blanket and placed it on top of her. Her small hands, clutched at his shirt.

"It's going to be okay," he replied, "it's going to be okay."

But Allie, didn't get to hear those words for she had fallen asleep, comforted by the embrace and warmth that man provided.

.

When Rose returned to the house, all was quiet. When she reached the living room, the scene in general made her heart beat faster. Even if someone had told her it would happen that very morning when she woke up, Rose would have thought it was all coming out of a movie, the kind she and Alfie went to the cinema to see. Cyril was asleep near the fireplace and Alfie was in his favorite armchair with the little girl sleeping soundly in his arms. Allie's head rested on his shoulder as he stroked her head with one hand. Small as she was, she seemed even smaller next to him. It was a familiar scene that he would never in his life have imagined would happen. Alfie was pensive, and only noticed she was there when she called out to him. Alfie looked up at her.

------

"We need to talk, right?" he whispered, as soon as he saw Rose standing in front of him, still holding the bags with what she had bought in her hand. "And we need to talk seriously."

PART 2

A/N: Allie was/is a little oc I created last year as Alfie's daughter. She's a sassy little girl, although back then, she was her biological daughter.

-----

@hoodeddreams13 @call-sign-shark @zablife

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endure & survive

Endure & Survive

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Washington, D.C., United States of America

With a new millennium come new beginnings.

The 90s were difficult on the United States, to say the least. Losing the Cold War had been no small thing, and President Reagan had left the White House in disgrace. What followed were a series of lackluster presidential administrations who seriously fumbled the postwar recovery of the country, and America became vulnerable-- not to outside forces, but to itself. In times of great strife, people have a number of options, but it usually comes down to two: either a society bands together to fix its problems and restore a sense of security to the nation, or it gives way to fascism. The United States, regrettably, took the latter path.

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***

September 26, 2008

Austin, Texas, United States of America

It was Joel's 35th birthday.

Ever since he had Sarah, he hadn't put much importance on his birthday, but she sure had. Ever since she could grasp the concept, she'd gone crazy for his birthday, waking him up when she was five by bringing him nothing but a can of Funfetti frosting and a spoon. Ever since that morning, the only reason he even kept it on the calendar was for her.

This birthday was no exception. Joel woke up to a perfectly prepared breakfast, eggs and bacon and sweet, fluffy pancakes, and despite the fact that he wasn't the biggest fan of pancakes, he polished off the whole plate. They rode to school together in Tommy's truck, Joel planting a kiss on Sarah's curls as she hopped out, and then he was off to another long day of work.

The radio crackled on the drive, after Sarah left. It had always been staticky in Tommy's truck, and though Joel had offered to replace it multiple times, Tommy had always turned him down, noting the charm of the old stereo. "Good morning Austin," said the DJ, less cheerful than he normally was. "Don't forget: tonight marks the sixth annual Purge, sponsored by the New Founding Fathers of America and the NRA. The Purge lasts twelve full hours, from seven PM to seven AM, during which time all crime, including murder, is legal and permitted. Stay tuned for more details as the day continues, and keep a television in your house tuned to channel nine for updates during the event. May God have mercy on your souls."

The Purge wasn't always on Joel's birthday, but since the date changed yearly to place it on a Friday, occasionally it would inevitably fall on his day. This was the first time it had happened, and Joel internally crossed his fingers and prayed to a God he didn't believe in that once, just this once, nothing terrible would happen to him in those twelve hours. In 2003, someone had set fire to their house. In 2005, someone had stolen the work truck he shared with Tommy. Last year, someone had gotten into the house next door and killed his elderly neighbors, leading him to shut off all the lights, turn off the television, and hide Sarah under his bed, sitting in front of it with his gun in his lap. Thankfully, the killers skipped over their house, believing it empty, and the siren sounded an hour later.

Joel and Tommy looked at each other, a palpable nervousness rising between them. "Looks like no birthday dinner, huh, big brother?" Tommy asked, his chuckle insincere. Tommy had fared much worse, as far as Purges went; in 2004, his fiancée had been brutally assaulted and murdered, leaving him in such fear that he hadn't found anyone else since. He dreaded Purge Night more than anyone else Joel knew, and Purge Night made Joel approximately ten thousand times more protective of Tommy than he normally was, and that was saying something.

For as protective as he was of Tommy, he was even more defensive over Sarah, his freshly 16-year-old little girl. If she hadn't been born before the instatement of the Purge, he probably wouldn't have had her. He didn't love the idea of having brought a child into a world like this one, and he never would have done it knowingly. Sarah had been the result of a one-night stand, and her religious mother had insisted on keeping her, but skipped town only a few months after her birth. Joel had kept up with her whereabouts in case Sarah ever got curious, but other than that, he had nothing to do with her, and he never would again, as she had died in the 2006 Purge. At the time, he had decided that Sarah was old enough to know, and told her.

"She's dead?"

"Yeah, she's dead." Joel ran his fingers through his curls, worried about how Sarah would react.

"Am I... am I a bad person?" she asked, startling him.

"What? How could you think that?"

"I don't feel anything," she explained, her eyes unable to meet his. "I'm not happy, but I'm not devastated. Am I wrong for that?"

He wrapped her up in his arms, hoping his steady embrace would be enough to break that thought pattern. "No, baby, you're not a bad person," he reassured her, rocking back and forth gently. "She was a stranger to you. It makes sense that you'd feel this way."

"Dad?"

"Yeah, kid?"

"I'm sorry."

He leaned back to look at her. "Why?"

"You deserved better." Sarah sighed, with too much world-weariness for a teenager. "You deserved someone who would love you."

"Well, lucky for me, I got you out of it," he countered. "It's a different kind of love, sure, but it's a hell of a lot of it."

"I love you too, Dad."

Joel slowly returned to reality, shrugging. "Guess not, little brother." He clapped a hand on Tommy's shoulder. "You're welcome at ours tonight anyway, you know that. Especially... you know, on nights like this."

Tommy swallowed, and his eyes became misty. "Thanks, Joel. I promised Sandra I'd keep guard for her tonight, though." Sandra, Tommy's neighbor, was a single mom, and a very kind woman, who Tommy liked to help. There was nothing romantic between them; they had simply become good friends after living next door to one another, and Tommy had become "Uncle Tommy" to her kids. He took pride in that, and made sure to be the best influence in their lives that he could be. That included being their armed guard on Purge Night, which seemed to be the only thing that kept him sane during the event.

"You're good to that family. They're lucky to have you."

"I'm lucky to have them." He didn't acknowledge why.

The workday itself was as uneventful as ever, save for a tension that needed a saw, not a knife, to cut. Hardly anyone on the jobsite enjoyed Purge Night, and most of the guys barricaded themselves indoors with their families. A few had lost family members, and there was no Purge bereavement leave, which meant mental health rapidly deteriorated in the days following the event. Some of the guys couldn't survive it. If three people lost family, one of them would be dead within the month, guaranteed. The NFFA didn't fund mental health services, promoting the false notion that if you weren't strong enough to beat it without help, you weren't strong enough to be alive anyway. It made Joel seethe with rage, considering the way he had watched Tommy grapple with PTSD since the death of his fiancée. To think that the government didn't even care if Tommy did okay, that they didn't care if he ever got better, that they even thought that the world was a better place without him in it, made Joel see red.

He barely made it home in time, racing out of the car after Tommy dropped him off and slamming and locking the door behind him. 6:53 PM. Sarah sat in front of the television, visibly shaking, likely thinking that her father was not going to make it back. Joel didn't bring it up, preferring not to upset her further, or plant the thought in her head, if that wasn't what she had been thinking about. "Got a cake, like you asked," he said, holding up the sheet cake he'd bought at the grocery store, nothing fancy or custom, but enough for him and his kid.

"Cool, Dad. I guess this is the best night possible to set the house on fire, considering the amount of candles we're going to need for you."

"Hardy-har." There couldn't have been a worse night, not really. If the house burned all the way down, they'd have nowhere to shelter, and be exposed to attacks. She probably had a bit of a point, though, since the last time their house had caught fire on Purge Night, Joel had acted quickly enough to pull off a little bit of insurance fraud before the sirens blared to get himself some extra cash for the repairs. After seeing how simple that had been, he'd spent further Purge Nights stealing money for Sarah's college fund, hoping to be able to ship her off to Canada and get her the hell out of the United States.

You, too, were a fraudster. As a youth, you had been very much the indoorsy type, learning everything that you could about computers and the Internet, and during the first actual Purge, you stole $200,000, all online. This money wasn't all for floating your personal lifestyle, though; you used much of it to furnish Purge shelters for the homeless and unemployed, or people who didn't have secure enough housing. Part of it went to your college fund, and part of it to the simple things about staying alive, but most of it was for charitable causes. The local mayor hated you, as he had been able to trace your activities, but he couldn't do anything about it unless he wanted to completely torpedo his own political ambitions. What you were doing was 100 percent legal, even if the powers that be didn't like it. Purge 2008 would be your last in D.C., as you needed to get out from under the mayor's watchful eye, his constant stalking to try to catch you doing something that wasn't entirely above board.

Austin wasn't better. It had been a great city before the rise of the NFFA, the most vibrant and artistic in the state of Texas, but it had since devolved into a rather beige wasteland. Joel missed the music, the street murals, the block parties, everything that had made growing up in Austin special. He wished he could give Sarah the same childhood he had had, but that was long gone.

Both of them jumped out of their skin when the Emergency Broadcast System sounded, even though they had both known it was coming, as it had come every year. The tones nearly split Joel's psyche in half, knowing the distress that Sarah and Tommy were about to experience for twelve or more hours. He'd made Tommy promise to text him once every hour.

A placid female voice began to read Joel's least favorite words. "This is not a test," read the TTS. "This is your Emergency Broadcast System announcing the commencement of the annual Purge sanctioned by the U.S. government. Weapons of Class 4 and lower have been authorized for use during the Purge. All other weapons are restricted. Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity from the Purge and shall not be harmed. Commencing at the siren, any and all crime, including murder, will be legal for 12 continuous hours. Police, fire, and emergency medical services will be unavailable until tomorrow morning at 7AM when the Purge concludes. Blessed be our New Founding Fathers and America, a nation reborn. May God be with you all."

As the terrible siren blared its warning call, Joel shuddered, nearly dropping the cake he still held. "Shut that damned thing off," he mumbled, shaking his head. "Don't need the noise."

Sarah did as he asked, and then walked with him to the kitchen, taking the cake from him. "Dad."

"What?"

"I'm sorry."

This time, she didn't need to explain herself. He knew what she was apologizing for. "Ain't your fault, kiddo, but thank you."

They only ended up lighting one candle, as they didn't want to spend long with the flickers of light being able to be seen from beyond the house. Joel blew it out, openly wishing that this Purge would be the last. Sarah nodded, but said nothing, and cut the cake. Once they had finished, they walked to the master bathroom and barricaded themselves inside, preferring to spend the night in a room with no windows and only one door. Joel sat with his gun loaded, pointed at the locked door, and Sarah sat in the bathtub, lined with pillows, watching videos on her laptop with headphones on so no one could hear.

Joel listened to music to pass the time, but only with one earbud in. He didn't think he could afford to dampen his sense of hearing entirely, as much as he wished that he could just block out the rest of the world, save for Sarah and Tommy, and disappear. The fucking Purge. How could one day of the year make the rest of it so goddamn intolerable? Of course, he knew it wasn't the Purge that made the rest of the year intolerable. It was the NFFA, those fascist shitheads, those good-for-nothing, controlling motherfuckers. The rage Joel felt was always barely, barely contained, always rippling beneath the surface of his strained exterior, always threatening to snap more easily than a twig under his boot. One of these days, he'd go ballistic. It wasn't a question of if, but when, something that was guaranteed to happen at one point or another, and when it did, he'd probably aim to break one Purge rule in particular.

As Joel was working his magic on his own laptop, hours after the sounding of the first siren, securing more money for Sarah's college, his phone began to ring. A chill shot up his spine when he read the caller ID-- Tommy. "Where are you?" he said as he answered, skipping over the formalities.

"Downtown!" A hail of gunfire rang out, Tommy's boots crunching on the gravel as he ran. "One of Sandra's kids ran off! Can't find her!"

"Goddamn it, Tommy."

"I wouldn't have left if it wasn't a child, Joel, you know that!"

"I know." Joel massaged his temple with his free hand, feeling a migraine incoming. "You need cover, don't you?"

"That's why I'm calling. I get it if you can't leave Sarah."

Sarah's hand landed on Joel's shoulder. "Dad, go," she urged, her headphones looped around her neck. "Go help Uncle Tommy. I'm safe here. No one's gonna know where I am."

Joel stared into Sarah's earnest eyes, the ones that so matched his own, but with more kindness, more softness. "Sarah, I--"

"Go," she insisted. "One of these days, I'll have to weather my first Purge without you. Might as well be now."

"You're just a kid."

"I'm 16, Dad, not six. I might not be an adult, but I have my wits about me." She threw her arms around him, squeezing tight. "I love Uncle Tommy, I really do, but he doesn't stand a chance out there without you. He needs you right now more than I do."

Joel hugged her back, feeling tears welling up in his eyes. "How'd you get so selfless, huh?"

"Learned from the best." Sarah pushed Joel away, shooing him. "Get out of here. You bring my uncle home safe."

Sarah was wrong, fatally wrong, but none of them would know it before it was too late.

Joel rushed to his truck, vigilantly watching his six. He scrambled in and started it, backing out of his drive without really watching. If he had been more careful, he might have noticed the men waiting, lurking, in the yard next door, but he was so focused on trying not to panic that his eyes weren't fully open.

Tommy did make it home. They were able to locate the missing child, and got her back to Sandra with nothing more than a few scrapes and bruises. Joel only witnessed a brief part of the reunion before rushing out to go back to his own child, his own responsibilities, but he was about to have those responsibilities stripped forever.

Sarah wasn't home anymore. Joel returned to a house with smashed-out windows, a fire burning in the kitchen. The glass on the floor resembled the shattered state of his very soul, upon knowing that his only baby wouldn't be where she was meant to be. With his heart in his throat, he raced up the stairs to his bathroom, his worst fears confirmed, yet more glass scattered across the floor and giving him the brief, morbid thought that he should use one of the shards on himself if anything happened to her. But where? Where could she have gone? True to form, clever Sarah had hidden a note for her father, scribbled in black marker under the lip of the sink: JEANNIES, it read.

Jeannie's was a nearby coffee shop that was popular with the local high schoolers and young adults. Sarah spent a decent amount of time there with her friends after school, usually coming home about the same time Joel did, so she could spend her evenings with him. Had she short-changed a barista or something? She wasn't the type...

Boys.

The thought occured to Joel before he was even ready for it, but that had to be it. Sarah was a pretty girl, and she'd probably turned a boy down for a date. Joel knew that some men and boys could be horrifically violent when being denied what they wanted, including actual human girls and women, and a scream of anger ripped from his throat. These boys, whoever they were, were going to pay.

The coffee shop was so close to the house that Joel thought it best to run there rather than driving, knowing that he didn't want to waste time trying to find somewhere to park the truck, or risk being noticed by Sarah's attackers prematurely. By this point, it was already 6:45 in the morning. With any sliver of luck, the siren would go off before they could-- he didn't even want to think the thought. There were too many awful things that they could do to her.

Sure enough, when he reached the coffee shop, he could see through the front windows that Sarah was tied down to a chair, a group of young men taking turns hitting her, kicking her, spitting on her. Joel found a pipe lying on the ground, ready to use it in defense of his kid. He didn't know how many of them he could get through before the Purge ended, but he certainly didn't plan on showing mercy. Knowing the door would be locked, he smashed the glass with his pipe, ducking to walk through it, appearing on the other side with nothing but murder on his mind. "You think you're gonna take my kid and get away with it?" he growled, his eyes flicking from man to man.

"I do, actually," said one of them, one of the shortest. "Daddy come to save you, princess?"

"What do you want with her?"

"Your little bitch turned me down," the leader hissed, smacking his open palm across Sarah's already bleeding face, the splits in her skin reflecting the brutality of a mediocre man scorned. "Girls don't get to turn me down, not without consequences."

Joel ran toward them, but found himself on the business end of a gun. "She's 16 years old, you bastard. How old are you? 30?"

"27." He looked pained that Joel thought him older.

Joel scoffed, spitting in his face. "Pervert. She's a kid."

"She's old enough."

"She ain't!" Joel landed a blow on the attacker's head, getting himself shot in the arm for it, but it didn't stop him.

"Kill the girl," the attacker managed to choke out, just before Joel broke his jaw.

He wasn't quick enough. One of the accomplices, already standing right in front of Sarah, raised his gun and fired, dissolving Joel's world in less than a second. The last thing Joel saw on Sarah's face, strangely, was a look of acceptance, possibly trying to still her heart in her final moments. A ringing started in his ears, but he didn't know whether it was due to blood loss or grief; in any event, it led him to continue beating the living shit out of the man who orchestrated the whole kidnapping, until he was as good as decapitated, there was so little left of his head. The other accomplices left him to it. They seemed to think Joel deserved the catharsis, or perhaps they were afraid of him turning his fury on them.

When Joel grabbed another one by the collar, he was shot again, this time in the back. Before he could retaliate, the most terrible sound rang out loud: the end siren. The Purge was over. He stared at each of the men individually, not needing to tell them what he would say next. "There's always next year," he promised. "Say your fuckin' goodbyes while you can, if you got anybody to say them to."

"It wasn't our idea," one of them, the one who shot Sarah, protested.

Joel whirled on him, pushing him to the floor. "You went along with it, didn't you? And you shot my daughter? I'm gonna start with you, I think, and I'm gonna work my way through every last one of you. You're dead. You're all fuckin' dead." He put a boot on the man's chest, holding him down while he took out his wallet and read the ID. "Jeremy Fisher. See you in 364 days."

The cowards ran off before Joel could change his mind, unsure how he was even able to control himself. He fell to his knees and gathered Sarah in his arms, knowing there was no hope for her. His knees almost came out from under him as he slipped in the gallons of blood running over the tiles, and he wished it would have made him slip, cracked his head, either put him out of his misery or woke him up from this nightmare. CPR wouldn't work. She was gone. He rocked her body back and forth until he finally passed out, ready to join her if possible, but the first responders found him.

Joel survived, but his heart did not.


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11 months ago

Safer

Summary: After the fall of the prison and a brutal assault, Daryl cares for you.

NOTE (please read): A mutual requested this a while ago. Took a long while to write, and tbh I considered turning the req down given the premise and my firm stance on writing graphic SA which you can find here. However, they explained to me that they are a victim of a violent s*xual assault, and they expressed it would be healing in a way to have a story where they were cared for by their comfort character. After some consideration, I decided to go for it. I'm sure a lot of us have been victimized by people who couldn't control their urges, or those who lacked respect for our boundaries, bodies, and consent. Myself included. So, this story is for us, to those of us that can stomach it. 

DISCLAIMER: There are no scenes of graphic SA, only the aftermath. While I will not be telling any descriptive scenarios of being assaulted, I do want to clearly express that this is a generally heavy story and it may not be suitable for all audiences. Please consume responsibly.

**I will not be tagging anyone on the taglist due to the content of this story**

18+MDNI ||  WARNINGS: non-graphic allusions to SA, violence, mild nudity descriptions, generally heavy content so I can't say it enough: TW!!!

Safer
Safer

Banner from: cafekitsune

IF YOU READ BEYOND THIS POINT, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I have made great effort not to trigger anyone, and to give all readers an opportunity to turn away if this story is not suitable for you.

Safer

        Daryl's vision was blurred as he blinked himself to consciousness. It took him some time to gather his thoughts and recognize his surroundings. His wrists and ankles were bound together, his mouth gagged with a cloth that tasted of sweat and filth. He stared up at the treetops towering over him. It was dark outside, save for the dim light of a dying campfire a few feet away. He lifted his head from the forest floor and looked down past his feet. Lumps of sleeping bodies under raggedy blankets and torn sleeping bags rested around him. His heart raced as his memories crept back in; of you, screaming his name, of him fighting off the group of men who caught him off guard, of twigs snapping and a searing pain over the side of his head. Was that why his face felt so sticky? Was it dried blood?

        His eyes strained in the fading light of ember and ash. Where were you? He noticed a crumpled form at the foot of a tree. Her breathing was shallow and her clothes were torn, pants not even pulled up over her bare behind. That much, he could see. His throat tightened. His eyes watered. What the hell had he let them do to you? How could he have let this happen? He had to get you out of there, and fast. If they hadn't killed him yet, that was surely on their agenda.

        He began to squirm and writhe against his restraints. Whoever tied him up had experience. Just as hopelessness began to set in and cloud his judgement with fear -- real, genuine fear -- he noticed a reflection in the leaves. Just a few feet past his boots, a man was curled up on his side, snoring lightly in the calm breeze. His back was turned to Daryl, and behind him set a grungy backpack with a blade sticking out of the smallest pocket in the front. He glanced back  to you, shivering on the ground, unsure if you were awake or unconscious or simply passed out from the exhaustion of prior events. 

        The sight of you in your disheveled mess was all her needed to kick him into gear. Carefully and hastily, he scooted himself down toward his only chance at redeeming his status as a loyal protector of the weak and vulnerable. Ideally, he'd be able to accomplish this in silence, but he was not in an ideal situation. His circumstances were heavy, laced in sweat and angst. The leaves beneath him rustled as his back slid across the ground, twigs snapping or moving to the side as he made his way closer to the large hunting knife. He'd pause between each scoot, studying the sleeping men around him for any sign of movement or wakefulness. When he'd decide the coast was clear enough, he'd resume. It felt like an eternity, but he made it there. 

        His core muscles strained as he sat himself up. He realized how sore he was. He must have taken a good beating. Seemed fitting, though. He was never one to go down without a fight. He left that sort of weakness in his past.

        He guided his shaky, bound hands over to the bag. He slowly slid the knife out of the front pocket. His heart raged against his ribs. He didn't dare take a single breath until it was secured. 

        Slow. Slowness. Slowly. He repeated every variation of the word in his mind as he positioned the knife between his palms and dragged it back and forth until the rope finally severed. A silent breath of relief escaped him as he ripped the gag from his lips and worked on the rope tied around his ankles. When he was free, he stood and counted the sleeping bodies beneath him. Excluding you, there were four. 

        He considered waking you up and running for the hills, but he couldn't leave any loose ends. No, he thought of it like when your t-shirt has a loose thread. You could leave it to keep unraveling, or you could burn it at  the base and extend the lifetime of your clothes. He decided he needed to burn this string before it could unravel any further.

        Starting with the man closest to him -- the one who so graciously left his knife in plain sight for the archer -- he krept over and crouched down, plunching the blade into the base of his skull. Then, he moved on to the next, and the next one, and the one after that, until they were all a problem of the past. Until that pesky little thread could do no further damage to the rest of the shirt.       

        When the dirty work was behind him, he dropped the knife and rushed over to you. Your wrists were tied like his, but you were tied to the tree so you couldn't run. He eyed you over and gulped. With your pants not fully covering you and your shirt all ripped up, he could see the finger-shaped bruises littering your skin. There was blood on your inner thighs. Your lips were swollen and cut. His blood heated until it hit a boiling point. His hands trembled as they hovered over you. Touching you  felt like a crime, but he had to wake you. He had to get you out of there.

        "(Y/N)." He whispered as he laid a hand on your shoulder. You were shivering in the cool air, but a thin layer of sweat blanketed your exposed flesh. He gave you a gentle shake. "((Y/N), c'mon. We gotta go." He pleaded softly.        

        Your body jerked and you jolted awake. You gave him no chance to explain as you scrambled to your knees and cowered away against the tree. 

        "(Y/N) it's me. It's Daryl." He attempted his most soothing tone of voice. "C'mon, let me get ya cleaned up."        

        He outstretched his arm, offering you his  hand. Without making eye contact you made a move to take it, but you were stopped by the restricting force of the rope that kept you anchored to the tree trunk. He moved quickly for the knife he tossed to the side earlier and returned with it. Without the pressure of remaining silent, he had your hands free in seconds.

        He wasted no time helping you to your feet and averting his gaze as he slid your pants up where they belonged. He found he had a hard time keeping his mind straight and focused as your weeping filled the quiet campsite. 

        "Shh.." He cooed, keeping one hand on your upper back as he ushered you along with him to gather his things and yours. A smart man would have rummaged through the belongings of the ones he killed, too, but he wasn't concerned with making a smart call at that point. He was only worried about you.

        "It's alright. C'mon. Let's get ya somewhere you can rest. It's alright. C'mon." He felt useless as ever, repeating the same generic words of comfort as you limped along beside him. He never urged you to up the pace, he didn't drag you along or have you carry your own bag. He felt like the least he could do was shoulder the weight of survival on behalf of you both. He couldn't get the image out of his mind of ou laying there,caked in blood, sweat, and bruises. A girl like you should have been caked in perfume and makeup. You hair should have been done up nice for a Sunday brunch, not matted with leaves and dirt. Your clothes should have been pristine and well fitting, unlike the filthy torn clothes that were beginning to hang off your frame like tender meat falling from the bone. You didn't deserve this. You didn't deserve any of it.

        Eventually he found an acceptable spot that looked like it could have been a den for a hibernating bear. It was a big shrub by a little stream, perfectly indented to give you both enough room to crouch under its foliage. He gently set you down, dropping his bow and your bags beside him. He crouched down in front of you and scanned you, worry written articulately over his features. 

        Your eyes remained glued to the ground. Your nose was upturned in disgust but your eyes told a different story; one of pain and despair and mourning for the person you were before that night. Your frown was deep enough to leave a scar. 

        "(Y/N)..." He breathed. Your eyes slowly found their way to his and welled with tears all over again. Of all things you had -- meaning, being alive and away from those men -- there was nothing you were more grateful for than his blue eyes staring back at you. You hated the way he looked at you with defeat and pity, though. You hated that he had one more thing to worry about. Still, he was there, and he was welcome. "Let's get ya cleaned up, okay?"

        You nodded once, if absentmindedly. Your thoughts were elsewhere. You couldn't pinpoint their location, though. They were scrambled, swarming all around you, like gnats you couldn't swat away.

        He pulled an old shirt from his bag and leaned over to the stream, getting it nice and wet before wringing it out. He turned back to you and brought it up to your cheek, gently dabbing and swiping away at the dirt, grime, sweat, and blood. He moved on to your neck and hands, then he paused. You both looked down at your jeans. You knew it needed to be taken care of, and he did too, but the question was really about which one of you would be brave enough to work on the gruesome scene between your legs.

        One look at your expression and he knew it couldn't be you. But, how could it be him? He couldn't put you in such a vulnerable position. No, not him.

        That's when the lightbulb went off over his head. The stream, of course.

        "Here." He offered you a hand. You took it slowly and he led you to your feet. "Wanna get in the water?" He asked. You stared down at the serene flowing water, trickling just before your feet. He cleared his throat. "I don't gotta look."

        You almost could have laughed. After everything that had happened, Daryl seeing you bathe wasn't really a concern. Still, you had to maintain some shred of dignity, and washing those men off of you was a much needed stride toward leaving that horrid night in your past. So, you nodded, and he turned away to start a fire where you could warm up after rinsing off.

        The button was busted off of your jeans. You guessed they couldn't waste their time with something as simple as undoing a button. You let out a shaky sigh and gritted your teeth. You moved to bend over and slide your jeans down, but a searing pain shot through your insides. You whimpered. "I can't." You barely managed.

        "Huh?" He asked over his shoulder.

        "I can't." You spoke up with a tremble. "I can't get them off. It hurts."

        His throat tightened up. Had they really been so cruel to you?

        "Ya want me to..." He trailed off.

        "Please." You whispered and shut your eyes. He stood beside you and pulled your pants down to your ankles, kneeling down as he did so.

        "Grab my shoulder." He instructed softly. You did. "Left leg." He said. You pulled it out. "Now the right." 

        With your jeans off, he stood up and looked down at your face, which you his from him, avoiding his gaze. 

        "Your -- Uh.." He glanced down at your underwear. You nodded, not needing to see what he meant. He followed the same process with those and turned away as soon as he was done. You cleared your throat. 

        "Can you help me sit?" You whispered. He sucked in a breath. It wasn't that you were annoying him. Anything but that, actually. He was glad to help you in any way you needed. It was the simple fact that you needed the help that was eating him alive. The thought that those guys could hurt you in this way, to this extent, was infuriating and heartbreaking. 

        He turned back to you and hovered behind you, placing a hand under each arm to support you while you lowered yourself down into the water. Once you were sitting on the creek bed, you adjusted yourself and sighed.

        "Just, uh, watch for snakes, okay?" Was all he could say before turning his attention back to the fire finally.

        Your frown deepened as you stared down at your bloodied thighs. A plop beside you startled you before realizing it was just the old shirt he was using to clean you up.

        "Figured ya might need it." He mumbled.

        You gripped the cloth in your hand and stared at it. Blood and filth stained it. Your lip quivered as you ran it over your inner thighs, scrubbing your own dried blood away and watching it disappear in the gentle current. You hissed and winced as you cleaned yourself where you were really injured. 

        When you were done, you peered over your shoulder, where Daryl stared at the small flame. He felt your eyes on him and he looked up at you. 

        "Need some clothes?" He asked.

        "Please." You replied. He nodded once and rummaged through your bag. He could only find a semi-clean shirt, but no more pants. He pulled his own bag forward and searched for the new two-pack of boxers he'd scavenged awhile back. 

        "I, uh, didn't see no more pants, but... You can have those." He said, holding your shirt and the fresh boxers out to you.

        "Thanks." You pressed your lips into a thin attempt at a friendly smile. 

        He turned away again so you could change your shirt, but you needed his help with the boxers, which he did without you needing to ask, and without a single peek at you.

        He helped you back over to the den where you could warm up by the fire. You kept the blanket in your bag, so he made sure to wrap it around your shoulders while you sat.

        "Ain't got no food." He broke the silence after a little while. You nodded.

        "Not hungry anyways." 

        "Mm." He hummed. "Get some sleep. I'll keep watch."

----

        By midday, you were on the move again, trailing right behind him as he stomped slowly over the underbrush so you could keep his pace. He'd stop every now and then, and though he didn't say it, you knew it was because he didn't want to overwork you. 

        By late afternoon, the sun was on the far end of the sky, casting an orange glow over the woods. 

        Daryl had barely been able to look at you, and you couldn't exactly claim any different. You two had taken a break again, sipping water and scanning around for any game or edible plants.

        "I want ya to know.." He cleared his throat, shattering the thick silence that glazed over you both all day. "I want ya to know I didn't see it. None of it."

        "I know you weren't looking." You deadpanned.

        "Nah, not at the stream. I meant -- I didn't see none of it." He clarified. He had a sneaking suspicion the reason you couldn't bare to look at him might have been the possibility of him seeing what had happened to you. He, however, just hated seeing you look so broken, knowing had he been more vigilant yesterday, none of those guys would have been able to sneak up on him. You looked at him finally.

        "I know. They hit you over the head 'cause you were fighting them."

        "Mm." He nodded. "I just... I need to tell ya I'm sorry." His voice cracked as he looked down at his hands and back up to you. His leg was bouncing anxiously and his gums must have bled from how hard he chewed at them.

        "Why?" You pushed your eyebrows together.

        "I shoulda been lookin' out. Shoulda protected ya. Shoulda--"

        "You were. You have been." You cut him off. "You've looked out for me every day since the prison. You've been protecting me since the quarry. You protect everyone. That wasn't your fault." You insisted. He just looked back down at his hands and sniffled, blinking back tears. He scolded himself for being the one to cry, when you were the one who got hurt. "Hey." You pressed on. "Listen to me. You got us out of there. You took care of them. You saved me. Then, you still took care of me. If we were still back there, they would have killed you and robbed you by now. And, if they hadn't killed me yet, I'd be wishing I was dead. I wouldn't be here without you. I would have never survived even before last night without you, and I wouldn't be sitting here telling you that today if it weren't for you."

        He looked you in the eyes as you spoke every word. It was a great relief to him that you weren't angry with him -- that you didn't blame him. Still, he felt so uneasy.

        "Can we camp here?" You asked suddenly. He shrugged.

        "Yeah. We can." He agreed. His voice was still broken.

        "Can I sit with you?" You asked. He looked confused but he still nodded, even if he was unsure what you meant.

        Ignoring the aches all over your body, you crawled over to him and sat in front of him, between his legs, leaning your back against his torso. He was stiff, unused to being so close to someone, but he didn't resist. As you settled in and got comfortable, he rested his arms by your sides.

        "You didn't fail me, Daryl. Nobody makes me feel safer."

Safer

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