...*cough* Me When Bsd *cough*

...*cough* Me when bsd– *cough*

Yes. YES. I myself don't post on ao3 but I feel pretty dang good when the authors of all the fics I commented on had noticed me simping for their works and responded to my more-often-than-not, more than 1 paragraph rambling in every single chapter.

“We hope this email finds you well” babe, the only emails I hope find me well are the ones from Archive of Our Own

Hmmm..... intewesting🤔

the first-years need some extra cash (maybe they want to set up a vacation fund or smth, because damn, do they need one right about now), so they start up a really unofficial restaurant in ramshackle dorm. because they're still in school, it's only open on the weekends, but it instantly becomes a hit with the other students, not least because the only other option is super expensive and gets you scammed more often than not.

yuu is the owner, naturally, and they convince some of the ghosts to help cook and wait the tables. they're also responsible for handling crises like table shortages and managing out their expenses.

epel is the actual chef of the group, who specializes in apple pies and apple juice, but who can make a mean chicken pasta if he has a recipe.

ortho's job is to sit on the couch and play music lol. he takes request and can play any kind of music, but his default setting is the "my next life as a villainess" opening theme.

jack is the head waiter of the place, since he's great at hearing orders, memorizing orders, and can carry multiple dishes at once without dropping them.

sebek is the bouncer, essentially, of the whole establishment. he's in charge of kicking out annoying customers and beating up customers that try to fight with each other.

ace and deuce take care of the entertainment. ace has a poker table in the corner of the room where people can challenge him for 1000 thaumarks, but nobody ever seems to win no matter what they try. deuce, on the other hand, literally just sits a table right next to ace, and for 10 thaumarks people can just... talk to him. you have people lining up AROUND THE BLOCK just so they can speak with him, giggling and leaning over his table like schoolgirls, because for as empty-headed as he is, he has a surprising amount of rizz.

(the restaurant is called "fresh meals by freshmen")

(their tagline is: "for just one meal a day, you can help these poor souls get the fucking vacation they need")

Bro if this was canon, It would fckin destroy me.

so you know that one scene in Book 6 (spoilers, everyone) where the overblot victims get put into a simulation that creates a scenario where their most trusted companions turn against them? (this is like Chapter 30 and Chapter 33, i think)

that, but instead of just their most trusted companions, its their entire dorm. like, maybe idia decides to push them to their limits and creates room for a whole "game", without realizing that their memories have turned the opponents of this game into their dorm members.

and like. i imagine in this one that the simulated versions of their dorm members aren't immediately antagonistic, so the overblotters (save for Leona and Jamil) don't realize it until each and every one of them tries to strike them down. and unlike their real-world counterparts, these ones don't seem to have a limit on the amount of magic they can use.

ace and deuce trying to go at riddle with everything they got, in a twisted parody of their first duel. cater just letting it happen because "that's what I would've done, too, Rids".

jade and floyd sabotaging azul at every opportunity until it eventually culminates in jade dueling azul for the housewarden seat, because he's not "interesting" anymore.

kalim and ruggie teaming up to attack jamil and leona in the garden... or maybe kalim helping ruggie call up child protection services on leona's ass lol.

epel finally, finally (or at least in Vil's view) getting his revenge for everything he went through by poisoning a bottle of apple juice and giving it to vil. and when vil is at his weakest that's one rook takes the shot.

just like... there was so much potential here, and i get why they couldn't use it, but still. i'm a little upsetti-spaghetti.

Fr though, he ain't letting people call him out for his rule breaking, he memorized all the rules just so he can call himself out.. by himself

Spreading my agenda that Ace Trappola might be the worst and best option for Heartslabyul's next housewarden

That's a crime

heartbreaking: the cool person you just met doesn't ship sskk