Once In A While Obi Wan Gets Into A Nostalgic Mood About How Much Anakin Has Grown. He Digs Up Anakins

once in a while obi wan gets into a nostalgic mood about how much anakin has grown. he digs up anakins old drawings and holopictures and a tunic he was supposed to fix but never did so it lies folded in the bottom of his drawer.

then there is a hollow tugging inside his chest because anakin used to be even smaller. anakin said his first words and walked his first steps and fixed his first droid and obi wan was not there to see it. no one can tell him what it felt like to hold a warm bundled anakin, small enough to fit in one arm. was anakin born with hair? did he like to be held like he does now?

obi wan thinks about anakins mother. is anakin anything like her? does he carry her eyes, her laugh, her heart? he never met her, he wonders what difference it wouldve made if he did.

in a sealed corner of his heart, perhaps he wishes that anakin carried a little of him too. theyll never be connected by blood. theyll never have the intrinsic connection tying them together. but like anakin has burrowed himself inside his bones, where all his blood originates, maybe there are pieces of himself in anakin hed forgotten to take out. they slipped without meaning and anakin kept them. even if its only in the way he ties his robes and curses when he stubs his toe.

then there is embarrassment. white blinding shame at his thoughts. he stops his mind from spinning further. these are strange things to desire, obi wan recognizes it. un jedi like, un obi wan like even. no one knows. no one will know. he feels stupid in front of himself.

Shoutout to all the queer folk in STEM. I doubt this is news to anyone but there's always a lot about theatre gays™ or how 'all' queer people's favourite subject at school was English. Here's to all the gays who CAN do maths, to all the queer scientists. I love been a queer in stem!

monody, by me, 2023

I wrote this poem around a year ago, and when deciding how to present it, I was very drawn to this idea of a disillusioned teenager taking things usually associated with childhood and innocence — stick figure drawings, hearts, school-issue notebook paper — and twisting them into an expression of the anger and resentment she feels. The hearts are broken, the stick figures are violent, the flower is wilting, the notebook paper is yellowed, and it amplifies the narrator’s loss of innocence, and her bitterness at that loss. The narrator is fictional, to clarify.

poetry tag list: @spacefinch @thewildballyntynesgrow @fionajames @sevdidntdie @transmascanakin @techs-goggles9902 @perilmax @kurlyfrii

As a former nerdy child (and current nerdy uni student) I love how you don't grow out of it, I love that ✨real scientists✨ remain genuine nerds: there's a sheet of paper stuck to the wall above the coffee machine in my internship mentor's office that shows an increasing linear function where x = amount of consumed coffee and f(x) = number of published papers. The researchers here regularly joke about electrons and syntheses and whatnot. Internship mentor told us all today about a science meme he'd seen the other day. It's amazing :')

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.