Once In A While Obi Wan Gets Into A Nostalgic Mood About How Much Anakin Has Grown. He Digs Up Anakins

once in a while obi wan gets into a nostalgic mood about how much anakin has grown. he digs up anakins old drawings and holopictures and a tunic he was supposed to fix but never did so it lies folded in the bottom of his drawer.

then there is a hollow tugging inside his chest because anakin used to be even smaller. anakin said his first words and walked his first steps and fixed his first droid and obi wan was not there to see it. no one can tell him what it felt like to hold a warm bundled anakin, small enough to fit in one arm. was anakin born with hair? did he like to be held like he does now?

obi wan thinks about anakins mother. is anakin anything like her? does he carry her eyes, her laugh, her heart? he never met her, he wonders what difference it wouldve made if he did.

in a sealed corner of his heart, perhaps he wishes that anakin carried a little of him too. theyll never be connected by blood. theyll never have the intrinsic connection tying them together. but like anakin has burrowed himself inside his bones, where all his blood originates, maybe there are pieces of himself in anakin hed forgotten to take out. they slipped without meaning and anakin kept them. even if its only in the way he ties his robes and curses when he stubs his toe.

then there is embarrassment. white blinding shame at his thoughts. he stops his mind from spinning further. these are strange things to desire, obi wan recognizes it. un jedi like, un obi wan like even. no one knows. no one will know. he feels stupid in front of himself.

sparring by an uneti tree

Reverse Destiel Meme

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Forever torn between getting a tattoo of a molecule that I really appreciate for its practical function and getting some random bs molecule I threw together in ChemDraw that probably doesn’t exist naturally or have a useful function that people will assume is surely cool and important. Like yeah, getting estrogen or caffeine or methylphenidate would be more meaningful technically but also way more boring than a biblically accurate nightmare molecule with an IUPAC name that takes 5 minutes to say and does nothing at all. Way better conversation starter, if you ask me.