If Any Of Y'all Wanna Know Some Random Gross Facts, Here You Are. I Personally, Found These Really Funny

if any of y'all wanna know some random gross facts, here you are. i personally, found these really funny and interesting

List of Extremely Cursed Knowledge

Having autism and ADHD is a blessing and a curse because on one hand, I’m basically a walking encyclopedia of random facts and information. On the other hand, a fair amount of that information is so fucked up that it’s not socially acceptable to share it with anyone. So naturally, I took every fucked up fact, every bit of twisted trivia, every bit of cursed knowledge that I could come up with off the top of my head and compiled it into one big list to post on the internet. Some of this information may permanently ruin your (you, the reader) perception of certain things. None of this information should have ever seen the light of day, and a fair amount of it was never, ever meant to be known by humans.

You cannot unlearn anything on this list. This is your chance to scroll past.

You have been warned.

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According to FDA standards, a jar of peanut butter is allowed to have up to seven (7) rat hairs before it’s considered unfit for human consumption. If it has 7 or less rat hairs it will still be sold in stores.

If I just ruined peanut butter for you, don’t google the FDA regulations on any other foods you enjoy.

Human teeth have 36 calories each.

The average human body has roughly 125,000 calories. This is actually relatively low, which makes cannibalism in humans generally unsustainable.

Human meat tastes like pork.

Penguins have been observed practicing necrophilia.

Dolphin vaginas secrete a substance that acts like an aphrodisiac on steroids. When scientists swabbed some of it on a chimpanzee’s penis, it masturbated so furiously that it had a heart attack and died.

Dolphins have been known to intentionally commit suicide if kept in poor conditions.

Scientists that work with cockroaches often become allergic due to exposure. Simultaneously, they also develop an allergy to chocolate and pre-ground coffee. Make of that what you will.

Dolphins have been observed masturbating using decapitated fish heads.

Dolphins have been observed getting high on pufferfish venom recreationally, sometimes even passing a pufferfish around like a joint.

There’s a LOT of rape across the entire animal kingdom. Like, a LOT. It’s especially prevalent in dolphins, otters, ducks, penguins, and primates, to name a few.

On a related note, female ducks have corkscrew shaped vaginas. Male ducks also have corkscrew shaped penises that measure in at a whopping eighteen inches.

The barnacle has the largest penis to body size ratio in the animal kingdom, with its penis being up to eight times as long as its body.

Chimpanzees have been observed using frogs as a fleshlight.

A disembodied human head weighs about 10-12 lbs and is balanced in such a way that requires you to use both hands to pick up.

Pigs will eat every single part of a corpse - including bones. In 2012 a farmer in Oregon was eaten by his pigs after having a heart attack and falling in their enclosure. This also makes pig pens a prime spot for dumping bodies.

A body will decompose faster if you fill the rectal cavity with yogurt before burying it

When burying a body, make sure to bury it in a heavily wooded area. If vegetation is too sparse and/or the body isn’t buried deep enough, it will be easily noticeable after a few months because plants will grow in much thicker directly above where the body was buried.

You cannot bury a body in sand, as sand is too porous. The smell will seep through and give away the location

The entire universe could theoretically exist as a false vacuum and collapse into nothingness at any moment without warning.

Any alien civilization advanced enough to detect life on earth is also probably advanced enough to destroy our entire planet almost immediately. At the peak of interstellar technology, the only limiting factor is the speed of light. If they decided to attack, we probably wouldn’t even know it was coming until the entire surface of the planet was already vaporized.

It takes three and a half rotations to fully detach a human head from its body.

Recently deceased bodies can experience rigor erectus, which translates to “death boner.” This is especially common in victims of hanging, as it’s primarily caused by trauma to the cerebellum or spinal cord.

There is an extremely real chance that you have unknowingly purchased a product that was made by modern day slaves at least once in your life. Coffee, cotton, fish, clothes, shoes, and technology are among the most vulnerable industries.

A decapitated head remains conscious for several seconds after separated from the body.

The entire koala population across Australia is currently undergoing a major chlamydia epidemic. It’s actually been extremely devastating for them and they’re currently facing the threat of extinction because of it.

For aro/ace writers:

- you don't have to write sex scenes. Tolkien didn't

- you don't have to write romance. Lewis didn't

- you can write very close friendships that have nothing romantic nor sexual in them. Scott Lynch did

- you can write sexual relationships that don't involve romance. Sapkowski did

- you can write romantic relationships that don't involve sex. Pratchett and Gaiman did

Don't let anyone tell you that some kinds of relationships are impossible or that a story must contain some themes. It's your story, write it the way you want

i just started watching hilda, and im still on the first episode, but yes

Do you ever watch a show or a movie or any piece of media meant for kids and just think about how the story or character or that one scene or whatever just spoke to your heart and soul, or just how profound it made you happy or break your heart. And just sit their thinking that this is for literal children, who probably still couldn't 100% understand the gravity of what they are consuming or probably couldn't articulate how they felt about it other than say they liked it or they dont, or it made them happy or sad, and you, a grown ass person is just thinking about how this thing meant for kids is just so simple yet complex with so many layers of emotions and plot and etc. That explores themes and subject better than media meant for your age, in a way that is simple yet incredible done.

me, reading this post:

me, reading this post: absofuckinglutely. finally people who understand

Niko: You ever dip your entire oreo in milk except for the part where you're holding it and feel like Thetis dipping newborn Achilles into the river Styx leaving him invulnerable everywhere except for his heel?

Edwin:

Edwin: Yes

hey jus popped in to say u seem cool and have awesome taste in media! Also ur the first person on tumblr I’ve found who is also Canadian :)

aw thanks, dps is literally the greatest film to have ever been created. fun fact: you're the first person I've met who's favourite film is dps too (this is excluding dps fan accounts)

also, do you live in ontario too?

i just finished watching derry girls and i feel like my life has ended. i want another season