I Have So Many Kunikatai Headcanons So I Thought I'd Share Them!

I have so many kunikatai headcanons so I thought I'd share them!

-they met in middle school

-started dating first year of high-school

-got married(illegally, kunikidas idea) in the autumn following graduation

-it was a very small wedding, consisting of the two of their parents, and a few friends from school

-it was in katais favorite Cafe, a very small place that not many people know about

-they don't live together for safety reasons

-only yosano, ranpo, and fukuzawa know

-kunikida doesn't often wear his wedding ring in fear if it getting damaged

-sometimes katai will force him to play various video games with him

-kunikida really likes stardew valley and similar games

-kunikida let's katai braid his hair sometimes

-katai sucked at first but he's surprisingly good now

-T4t kunitai

-kunikida had a 'rebellious phase' type thing in high school

-and a short emo phase in middle school

-his teachers liked him for being a smart student but hated how often he got in trouble

-he would beat up anyone who made fun of katai

-katai would always tell him not to bother doing that but would absolutely do the same if anyone made fun of kuni

-kunikida helps katai cut his hair

-katai visits the agency one day and ends up telling everyone about kunikidas high school years

-everyone is absolutely shocked (minus ranpo ofc)

-kuni frequently gets kicked out of libraries for arguing with the librarians over how the books are arranged

-They meet at the school nurses office!!-katai had a very bad panic attack and kuni got into a pretty bad fight

-school nurses kinda suck tbh so kuni helps katai with his panic attack

-they become good friends after that

-or they could meet in a school counselors office for the same reasons

-they'd probably bond the same way too bc school counselors suck more than school nurses(Like seriously though, once my old school counselor told me that I was being selfish/a selfish person for being suicidal)

-kunikida is totally the type of guy to just throw random compliments into any sentence he can

-katai let's kunikida sit under his futon with him

-pillow forts!!!!!!

-autistic kunikida

-katai does his best to help

-like, talking for him as best he can when kuni goes nonverbal

-and offering him looser clothes when his feel bad

-MOVIE DATES!!!!

-And arcade dates!!

-Kunikida frequently has to drag Katai away from those because he keeps destroying little kids in games

-Dazai and Chuuya were on an arcade date of their own and ran into them once

-it turned into a double date where Katai tried to beat Dazai at every game possible and the other two just watched and cheered a lil

-katai hates pda

-kunikida also doesn't like it much, he thinks it's weird and unprofessional

-they cuddle a lot at home tho

-they both confessed at the same time

-kunikida said that he had something very important to tell katai

-katai said that before that he had something to give kunikida and hands him a letter

-kuni reads the love letter and is just like.."i...I was going to say the same thing.." and looks away blushing

-kunikida proposed

-he took katai out to a very small Cafe that hardly anyone knew about

-they ordered food and talked a bit and once katai got comfortable being there he proposed

-katai obviously said yes

-they got married (illegally) a few months later

-Katai said that he loved kuni first

-kunikida would have said it but he got too nervous about making katai uncomfortable

-katai didn't mean to say it but it accidentally slipped out

-Katai has social anxiety

-Kunikida helps as best he can, bringing Katai things so he doesn't have to go out and talk to people as much

-He still forces katai outside

-They go on walks every evening or so

-Kunikida does most of the cooking

-Katais not bad at cooking, but he just doesn't

-They lay in bed and listen to music together

-When kunikida was a teacher Katai would stop by and bring him lunch after his missions sometimes

-Kunikida taught advanced middle schoolers algebra and paet timed at the agency after

-his students were shocked when they found out

-Kunikida got arrested for protesting and breaking off those spikes cities put up to prevent homeless people from sleeping a lot

-Katai bailed him out every time

-Kuni became pretty decent friends with a couple of other people who frequently got arrested for similar things and some of the cops who repeatedly arrested him

I probably have more but that's all I can think of right now!

one day Dazai has an idea and decides that it was much better than doing his work so he runs to the store and comes back with a bag of catnip, just in time for atsushi's lunch break.

He goes up to him and starts talking to him and while their talking he sprinkles some in atsushi's food

Atsushi just runs around the rest of the day. Starts, like, biting his pencil and his other stuff. No one (other than ranpo and dazai ofc) know what happened until the bag falls out of dazais pocket.

Atsushi got sent home early and Kunikida yelled at dazai for an hour. Most everyone else thought it was funny.

my favourite ship dynamic is “me and the bad bitch i pulled by being autistic” but you can’t tell which is which

"audhd ranpo and autistic + depressed dazai ".

"bursts into the room out of breath DO YOU HEAR ME

ranpo is so very autism and adhd coded please you cannot convince me otherwise we've all seen the untold origins of the detective agency !!!

15/16 dazai is so autism coded istg i can write a whole ass essay on this (bonus !! 22 dazai getting better at masking ??) plus the depression feels pretty canon ngl like?? the dark era and his character arc has so much depression allegory ??"

requested by @lanternzz

Dazai and atsushi both try to kill themselves on the same roof, at the same time

Tw for su!cide obviously

This is pretty bad but in my defense it's like, 2am right now.

Word count: 457

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It was a sad night, nothing particularly bad had happened, and it hadn't been raining, it just felt sad.

Dazai stood on the edge of the rooftop. He was hoping to finally succeed in killing himself. He'd been trying for years but luck had never seemed to be on his side, but tonight, tonight he would succeed. It was a perfect night for a suicide attempt, dark, cloudy, a little bit foggy, no one would interrupt him tonight.

He took a deep breath, preparing himself for the fall. He took a small step closer to the edge, this was it, finally. Just as he was about to fall he heard the door to the roof creak open. Turning around. He saw a familiar head of white hair staring at him.

"..Atsushi? What are you doing here?"

Atsushi didn't respond, he was trying to gather his thoughts. He had finally worked up the courage to do it, he'd wanted to just give in and kill himself for years, but he always got too scared and stopped before he did anything fatal.

"Atsushi?" He was snapped from his thoughts by Dazai calling his name.

"Oh- uh, y-yeah, Dazai?"

"What are you doing up here this late, Atsushi?"

"Oh, right, me. I'm.. I'm here to.. uh-" he hadn't considered the idea that someone could be here already so he hadn't bothered to come up with am excuse for if he got caught. "I- I'm here to enjoy the view! Yeah, the beautiful night sky! Isn't it great from up here! Ha...ha." He knew that he was not convincing anyone with that pathetic excuse, especially Dazai, who already figured out what was going on.

"..The view is nice from up here, you're right, although, I'm sure that's not actually why you're here, is it?" He sits down a few steps from the edge, patting the ground next to him to signal for Atsushi to sit next to him.

Atsushi sighs, "You're right, it's not."

"I assume you're here for the same reason as me, right?"

Atsushi doesn't respond and Dazai takes that as a yes.

"Well, I guess if neither of us are gonna succeed tonight there's no point in being here, huh?" Dazai stands up and stretches, and Atsushi follows after a moment.

"I guess not."

"Man, all this trying to kill myself has really made me hungry, let's get something to eat and..talk a bit, sound good Atsushi? My treat~!"

"Yeah... let's do that."

And with that, the two of them made their way down the building and out to find some restaurant that's still open at 2am.

Maybe tonight hadn't worked out the way they wanted it to, but it still worked out in the end.

I think my skeleton is ready to hatch