Let Go

️let go 

letting go might be one of the hardest part in the break off of a relationship. spending so much time with that one person can make you feel comfortable and not lonely, once the relationship is done it hurts to know that the one that you love won’t keep on being next to you. 

it’s hard to accept that you’re probably going to live sleepless nights, feel empty bed sheets, and miss those morning kisses you loved so much. not feeling in companion even when you’re alone, it’s probably the worst of all.

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from the outside yoongi’s way of letting go was kind of off. considering that whatever he was doing, was one of the reasons that him and jimin broke things off. 

he still drunk a lot, he was shit faced most of the time, oh well, that was when he was spending his time alone. around others he seemed pretty chill and collected without a worry on his mind, he looked as if he totally got over jimin, and once jimin saw his character being this way it broke him, more than he was before. 

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nights with friends, new found lovers and multiple none meaningful  kisses and touches. he was the one now doing it. he was the one giving himself to the lust and pleasure but then again feeling pain and shame for himself. he couldn’t seem to find a route anymore. 

his mind would barely travel through the memories of his old lover, he barely wondered how he was doing, he only thought about his feelings. absorbed by the loud and painful knifes that would hold those memories, he was scared to forget but even more to regret the decision he made.

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most of the times he wouldn’t dare spend his time alone. he was scared of what loneliness could bring. he spent time with friends, friends that jimin thought were his friends too since he has developed a relationship with them for much longer than yoongi, but then realizing he was wrong, the friends jimin thought were his, only left him to abandon him for yoongi taking yoongi’s side and forgetting all about jimin.

yoongi somehow, never cared for that, he really was an egoist, he really only cared for himself at that point, he somehow just forgot that his old lover was a person, and acted like he was not allowed to feel any pain. yoongi acted like he was the victim, and whatever he did and hurted his old partner had it coming considering he made him feel worst in retrospect. since yoongi learned from the miss information of his friends that for them probably jimin had all the fault. and it consumed him, it consumes jimin. til the point that jimin was so hurt, that he wouldn’t dare speak to yoongi ever again.

‘life is not meant to not meet the person you love, min yoongi you changed me for good you’re the one person i feel connected to and i feel sad and happy at the same time cause i don’t get to meet you but i still get to admire you from afar.

maybe our paths won’t ever meet but you’re the one i’ve always aspired and dreamed of, you’re the one that makes me happy, you’re the one to me and i hope you get to feel happy for the rest of your life’

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a letter to park jimin;

 my star forever and always

throughout my entire journey with you i felt fuller. every day i fall more and more in love with you. you’re one of the reasons i wake up every morning even when i don’t have the strength to. you shake my heart every time i think of you, in a way that no other human has ever let me feel. you are the love i always wanted to feel for someone. you are my sunshine, you are my darkest nights, and my happiest and saddest moments in life.

at first i haven’t noticed the way you made me feel, at first i didn’t realize the way you inspired me to become a much better and hardworking person. with you in my life i’ve learnt that it’s okay to have insecurities, even though sometimes we don’t know how to deal with them, you’re everything and more to me. i feel like even though i don’t know you, even though you don’t know me, i fell for you and the whole self you show to the world.

maybe i don’t know every part of you. i wish i could. but having you as you are is enough for me. watching you smile, laugh, cry, get frustrated is enough for me. you are enough for me. and by far you are one of the best person i’ve never got the chance to meet.

on my darkest days. i listen to you, i listen to your sweet caring voice, the melodies you breathe out and your laugh. on my sleepless nights, i close my eyes and listen to your voice, i fall onto a deep trance and feel intoxicated by you, and it lets me find some peace. i thank you for that. your existence is the reason im happy, you’re the reason that im not scared of love, because i love you. 

do you remember summer ‘09?

you like your little baby like you like your drinks, cool 💦

do you remember summer ‘09?