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The Only People For Me Are The Mad Ones, The Ones Who Are Mad To Live, Mad To Talk, Mad To Be Saved,
The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars. (x)
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NEEDING SOMETHING
"What about Tobin?" he asked
What about Tobin? She had been dreading that question. They were at the Kingdom, in a room that had once belonged to the school secretary, but had long since been turned into a bedroom. There were two cots pushed along either wall, and two utilitarian chairs. Daryl was sitting, she was leaning against the wall staring out the window, her leg hurt if she sat or stood still for too long.
When her family found her she had been both happy and sad. Happy to see them, but also sad because she couldn't be with them anymore. Rick had been full of admonishments, Rosita had been angry and the rest looked world weary and weighed down by grief. Daryl had been mostly silent, but he looked at her with worried eyes. Morgan filled them in on how they had been saved, and how the Kingdom's doctor had treated her wounds. They had fussed at her until Morgan decided to take them on a tour, so Carol could rest. Only Daryl remained, he sat with her, not pressuring her, but slowly asking questions, trying to access the situation. She answered him as honestly as she could. She didn't want to talk to him about Tobin, but if she was being honest about other things she needed to be honest about him as well. She sighed.
"Poor Tobin, he was just a warm body for my bed, and just saying that makes me sick." Daryl gave her a puzzled look. "I was miserable, and I just wanted the voices in my head to shut up. I used him to feel something else for a while, but afterwards the pain was still there."
"If you needed someone, why didn't ya come to me?" She could hear the hurt in his voice.
"Oh Daryl" she said lowering herself into the chair next to his "I couldn't have treated you like that. Plus, you would have known something was wrong, and called me on it."
"Yeah" he agreed, chewing on his thumbnail "but if you really needed something, I would have done anything to make you feel better." That was a pretty big admission coming from him, and Carol was touched.
"I don't want it to be like that between us" she said, grabbing his hand before he could pull away. "You mean so much to me, and if anything happened between us I'd want it to come from a place of joy not sadness." Daryl intertwined his fingers with hers.
"So, no more Tobin."
"No more Tobin." She smiled. Daryl seemed relieved.
"Good."
(A03)
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