Its Raining(Sebin-Snuper)

It’s Raining(Sebin-Snuper)

~It's rainin, it's rainin, wash away my tears. It's pain, it's pain, erase my scars. Every time, you say it's over, that you're tired, as you push me away, but your trembling lips don't really convince me~

"How's dinner?" You ask your fiance as you keep your gaze on your plate, pushing your food around.

He didn't say anything, instead answered you with a grunt which made you roll your eyes. Of course he wouldn't answer you, not when he was in a pissy mode. Honestly you were getting pissed yourself. You were getting so tired of Sebin coming home and acting like this, and he's been doing this for months and you had no clue why. You just wished that you knew the reason why he was acting this way. Did something happen at work?

You set your spoon down, not really feeling hungry anymore, and picked your plate up to bring it to the sink. Sebin wasn't finished with his or paying attention so you just went about your own business. You thought about what to do, tonight was you guys' date night but like you said he wasn't 'in the mood'. He wasn't ever in the mood anymore.

~Cruelly painful days (you cry) But still, I can't let you go. You're standing at the edge of a cliff (sorrow) I won't let go of your hand~

You were now sitting on the couch, reading a book that totally caught your attention from the start. You were so into it that you honestly were starting to feel like the main character was. Of course that's how you always were when you read a book you really liked. And then it happened, what every book lover dreads. Your favorite character died, and now your crying like a baby. Yes it's ridiculous but come on, they described it and everything! Not to mention he died right in front of the mc!! Like seriously! What the hell?!

The book was now laying on the floor across the room, where it landed when you threw it after you got pissed. You? Well you were currently curled up into a ball on the couch with tissues laying discarded next to you. You kept blowing your nose and wiping your eyes to stop the tears, all the while thinking about how stupid you were. This is so stupid! You thought to yourself as you used yet another tissue to wipe away the never ending tears.

"Y-y/n?!" You heard before you turned your head and looked at Sebin through your blurry vision.

"What?" You croaked out then cleared your throat when you heard how hoarse your voice was.

~I'm not thankful, I'm not sorry, it's love because it's crazy. I'm not struggling, I'm not tired, it's love only if it's crazy. It's rainin, it's rainin, wash away my tears. It's pain, it's pain, erase my scars~

"B-baby, what's wrong? What happened?" Sebin was now kneeling in front of you with a look of sheer panic and concern laced in. You opened your mouth to reassure him, tell him that it was just because of a book, and secretly you were ecstatic that he was finally giving you his attention. Although, when you was trying to tell him he kept interrupting you.

"Listen, if it's because I've been so distant and closed off I am so sorry! It's just that work has been very stressful lately! And I know that I shouldn't have taken it out on you, but I didn't want to worry you so I just didn't tell you anything!"

Your eyes widened in surprise as tears started falling down his cheeks, then you started to feel really guilty. But of course, every time you tried to calm him down and tell him the reason you were still bawling he would interrupt you. You were starting to get agitated and finally got so upset that he wouldn't let you talk that you exploded.

~You cry (cry) You said let's just end this cleanly. Don't try (try) trick for me, why are you lying? I know you, you're not like that. I'm not that generous, I never cool to you. I won't easily let go of you baby~

"Sebin! For heaven's sake shut up!" You yelled out as you covered his mouth, instantly feeling even worse when you saw the hurt expression cover his face. You sighed and started to explain, "Baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you, but you wouldn't let me speak and I was getting agitated. Now, will you let me speak and listen carefully?"

He looked at you, wiped his tears, and then nodded. Then, after making sure you had all of his attention, you began to explain carefully.

"I was hurt that you weren't speaking to me, but I understood that it had to have been because of work. Sebin, I know that you wouldn't purposely hurt me and that's why I didn't say anything about it." He opened his mouth to speak but quickly closed it again when you threw him a look. "Now, listen to what I'm about to say and listen good. I was not crying because of you sweetheart."

~Even if you barely endured me (you cry) I'm sorry, I won't fall for it. Your break up is just a complaint (sorrow) You don't mean it. I'm not thankful, I'm not sorry, it's love because it's crazy. I'm not struggling, I'm not tired, it's love only if it's crazy. It's rainin, it's rainin, wash away my tears. It's pain, it's pain, erase my scars~

He looked at you with confusion and raised an eyebrow. "Then, why were you crying so hard? I mean, seriously, what the hell made you cry so hard that you used all of those tissues?" His face than instantly hardened, making you back up a little due to shock and a little bit of fear. The look on his face was honestly terrifying, but it was actually kind of hot to see this side of him. Shut up, y/n. Stop being weird, you mentally scolded yourself as you turned your attention back to Sebin.

"Did someone hurt you?" He asked so calmly it made you gulp.

"What?" You squeaked out, unable to actually form a sentence.

"Someone hurt you? Who the hell was it?! Tell me there name so I know who to hurt."

Your eyes widened once again, surprised at the turn this conversation was taking. "No, Sebin calm down! You don't need to hurt anyone!"

"Of course I do. Y/n if someone hurt you enough to cry this hard then they're dead!"

~I won't erase, I won't let go, even the rain is stopping you. I can't erase, I can't let go, that's the only way I'll live. It's rainin, it's rainin, wash away my tears. It's pain, it's pain, erase my scars~

Your jaw was now slack, probably making you look like a complete idiot but you didn't care. Your eyes started tearing up, but from a different reason and feeling this time. You were happy, ecstatic actually, that Sebin was telling you this. Showing you just how much he cared for you, something he won't normally tell you. Feeling all of these emotions you grabbed his face and kissed him, succeeding in calming him down and shutting him up.

You pulled back and almost laughed at the look he had on his face, it was so funny that you didn't even know how to describe it. He quickly snapped out of his stupor though when he saw the tears on your face, then he started to wipe them away. When he started muttering that he was sorry but honestly looked like he didn't know why he should be apologizing, well that's when you finally let out yours laughs that you were holding in.

Of course this made him even more confused, but he waited patiently until you were finally calm enough to explain to him. "Sebin-ah, have I ever told you how much I love you?"

He turned his head away quickly, but not quick enough since you saw the light blush forming on his cheeks at my words. You chuckled and turned his face back towards you, holding your palms over his cheeks.

~Rainy day will pass. When tomorrow comes, it'll be alright. Fall even more. Hide my scars~

"First off, I was crying because my favorite character died in my book not because of you Sebin-ah." He didn't say anything, just sat there with his mouth open in shock. You held in another laugh and continued. "Second, I kissed you and started crying again because I was happy."

He looked at you confused. "Why were you happy?"

"Because of what you said Sebin. You told me that you'd hurt anyone that made me cry and that made me so happy because you've never showed me that much emotion. Ever. And I was so happy to know that you cared that much."

He didn't say anything, just continued to look at me with a blank look on his face. Finally he turned his gaze away and scratched at his head. "Geez, Hyung was right," he muttered which then made you the confused one. He saw the look on your face and let out a light chuckle, leaning forwards and capturing your lips with his. "You women are bipolar." He said, chuckling as he pulled away and dodged the pillow you threw at him.

"I love you, Sebin-ah," you told him softly as you two snuggled together on the couch.

"I love you too, jagiya. And I promise that I'll talk to you next time, I won't shut you out ever again."

First Love(Sehun-EXO)

Requested by: kpop-panda55

~Oh oh oh oh(the secret diary of my first love)ah-yeah. Step by step, I follow you. Without you knowing, I match my footsteps with yours. Your scent passes by my clothes. Why am I so nervous? It's so sweet~

Fans, what does that word mean? To normal people fans are people that squeal and flip out over their favorite group. To other fans, some are like a family that bonds together over their favorite groups while others are seen as enemies. To that idol or group though, fans are precious. They are the reason the idol is able to do what they love, what they're passionate about. And to your boyfriend, Oh Sehun of EXO, well fans were basically a second family to him. He loved them, and you understood.

Even though you understood, you were hurt when no matter how much you tried to show them. Tried to explain that you actually really liked your boyfriend. None of them cared it seemed like, and you were getting so much hate in such little time that it honestly shocked you. Most of all though, you were hurt from the things you'd read. Some pointed out the fact that you were just 'using' Sehun and some pointed out all your flaws, what you were the most insecure about they would somehow find out and make fun of them.

Of course, you couldn't tell Sehun. How could you when he loves them so much, when they help him and his group continue their dream. You couldn't and it really hurt you to lie to him, but you couldn't think of a better solution. Honestly, you wanted to defend yourself but that would involve Sehun seeing it all and that would most definitely not work out.

~That small and pretty hand is almost about to touch almost about to touch, it tickles my heart. I'm holding onto this soft warmth. our innocent love story has only been told to me~

"Jagiya~"

You quickly locked your phone and put a smile on your face, turning to greet your boyfriend. "Hey, Hunnie~"

He chuckled and hopped onto the couch next to you, laying his head on your lap and closed his eyes when you started to run your fingers through your hair. "What's the plan for today?" He asked as he yawned and looked up to you lazily.

"Hmm~ I was just about to head to the store to get stuff to make for dinner. Want to come with?"

His eyes widened and he jumped off the couch, quickly heading into the foyer so he could get his shoes and wallet. You let out a laugh and got up after him, though at a slower pace than his. Then once you two were ready you set out and headed in the direction of the store, you ignoring the multiple pings coming from your phone and informed the curious Sehun that it was probably just notifications and you'd check later.

~My heart (is white) my cheeks (are red) Our eyes are locked (black) my sky turns (yellow) It feels like I'm floating above the clouds, it feels like I could fly, this gentle heart pounding. You came to me and bloomed(a pretty single stemmed rose)~

You two had arrived at the store and were wondering around, finding the things you would need for dinner. Sehun had used his aegyo on you multiple times to get you to buy stuff you really didn't want to, and it aggravated you that you still were a sucker for him doing that. You sighed as once again your boyfriend had just used his cuteness to spoil him and get him something else.

"Yah!" You shouted softly and pulled on his ear lightly, making sure to get his attention. "Go away~"

"Wah?!" He shouted back and looked at you with wide eyes. "Wae?"

"Because you keep using aegyo to get me to buy you a bunch of extra crap, you're going to make me go broke on this shopping trip alone!"

He smirked and got closer to you, making you almost giggle but you bit your lip to hold it in. "I can always repay you jagi, you know that."

You narrowed his eyes and poked at his chest, "I don't think so. Go!"

~You are my light (my light that shines in my heart) A secret that no one knows (a secret only we want to keep) The most dazzling picture (my picture, such a beautiful picture, love) Every day, I practiced all the sweet sweet words ~

He pouted and sighed before turning and walking to who knows where to wait as you got the rest of the items on your list. Once he was out of sight you smiled at his behavior and then pulled out your phone, your smile dropping as you saw the many notifications from twitter and instagram that most likely involved hate messages.

And of course, you were right. You scrolled through the many messages and felt tears starting to prick your eyes, but you quickly wiped them away. Sehun would notice, you told yourself as you sucked in a deep breath and went to put your phone away. You stopped though when your eyes caught a picture that was taken just a few minutes ago when Sehun had gotten close to you. The message underneath said, I just overheard them! He said he'd pay for her crap! She's totally just using him for his money! Ugh, she just needs to go away!! Seriously!

Your eyes widened and your heart stopped when you read the un-true words, wanting to defend yourself but you couldn't. You were frozen and tears were about to start falling down your cheeks, and unfortunately you didn't think you'd be able to stop them.

"Jagi, are you ready to check out?"

~But when you look at me and smile they all melt down, out of my memory. But nothing else is needed when it comes to a boy and girl's first love. With clear eyes, you whispered to me and in that reflection, I am smiling~

You quickly made sure your cheeks and eyes were dry then set your phone down, grabbing the last thing on your list then turning quickly towards your boyfriend. "Mhm," you smiled over at him.

"You okay?" He asked, always somehow being able to see right through your facade which surprised you each time.

"Of course," you said to keep up the act. "Just tired is all."

"Oh, well here. Let me push the cart okay?"

You smiled and stood aside as he grabbed onto the railing and started towards the check out aisles, you following quickly.

-short time skip-

You had paid and you were both now headed to your house, and Sehun kept pestering you about why your eyes were red and why you seemed upset. It surprised you since you thought that he'd drop the subject by now, but apparently he wasn't going to just ignore it this time. So you noticed something that would save you some time and you silently thanked God before turning and mentioning the forgotten bag to Sehun, who in turn offered to run back and get it but not before telling you to stay where you were.

So now here you were, leaning against the wall and waiting for your boyfriend to come back with what you are now going to call your personal life saver. Even though it was weird to call a bag of tomatoes that, you would since it ultimately saved you from having to keep lying to the one you loved.

"Well, would you look what we have here."

~My heart (is white) my cheeks (are red) Our eyes are locked (black) my sky turns (yellow) Everything looks different. Why am I wandering through dreams every day? Everyone has this dream at least once. Even your name makes my heart flutter, this dream called first love~

Your eyes widened and you looked up quickly, suddenly seeming a lot smaller than the group of girls that were now surrounding you. Gulping, you looked around the street just noticing how quiet it was to see that it was empty. Except for the small group of you guys there was no one out, and it scared you even more knowing no one would help you.

"What do you want?" You asked softly to the girls who honestly didn't look that much older than you, but they definitely looked like they knew a thing or two about how to hit someone.

"We want you to leave our man alone. Stop using him and just die." Die. That word somehow struck fear into you, and started repeating in your head. No one's ever told me to die, you thought with rising panic as the girls got even closer.

Your panic was well placed it seemed as the 'leader' of this group started to pull at your hair, talking about how you were too ugly for him. All the others started to join in too, and now you were partially bent over and gasping for air from the blow one of them just threw to your stomach. I'm too scared to move, you thought as you closed your eyes tightly and prayed for someone to help you.

~I'm falling deeper and deeper, like a child who has seen the world for the first time. The unknown mystery that is you, I want to get to know one by one. Teach me what love is, only you can teach me. Slowly draw it on a white piece of paper so only I can see. Every day, it's crazy, I will be with you, I dream baby. Love you baby baby. You came to me without a sound, carefully spreading more and more~

You wanted to cry out but you couldn't, you were still trying to catch your breath from that first punch. Distantly though, you honestly thought that you heard someone. Someone calling out for them to stop. For them to leave you alone. You thought you were imagining it though, not seeing who would be coming to help you now. But you noticed you weren't when you heard the voice louder this time, clearer, meaning the person was getting closer to you. And you just noticed who it was, even though it was hard to distinguish with the blood rushing in your ears it seemed.

"Yah, leave her alone!" Your lovely boyfriend screamed out as he pulled them off and stood protectively in front of me, as if using his body as my shield.

"S-sehun!" The 'leader' stuttered out, nervous now that her idol had seen them abusing his girlfriend. His love. The girl who meant everything to him.

"What the hell are you doing?!" He screamed out, angry and pissed beyond reason. You glanced up at him and noticed that his shoulders were rigid and shaking, meaning he was a kind of pissed you've never even seen before.

"W-we-"

"Don't even think about making up excuses!" He looked at all of them and then noticed the exo badges one girl had on her shoulder bag, pointing them out. "You're fans?"

~Everything I got to know through you is beautiful, I want to fall asleep forever in this dream. My heart (is white) my cheeks (are red) Our eyes are locked (black) my sky turns (yellow) The moment I stepped inside your world I was born again~

The girls all noded happily, thinking that this was their chance of redemption. Of getting Sehun to forget all of this. But they were wrong, wrong to think that even though they said they were fans that Sehun would just forget the fact that they made you bleed. Their looks of fear intensified when they saw Sehun smirk and heard him let out a low laugh, definitely not a laugh any of the girls there including you had heard before.

"How dare you." He said, calm all of a sudden which frightened even you. "How dare you call yourselves my fans, my group's fans, when you just beat the girl I love. And the hate, was that you as well?" The girls did nothing, just shook in fear and numbness. "Was it?!" Sehun suddenly shouted loudly, making everyone flinch.

"We started it yes," the leader of the girls said when she finally worked up enough nerves to speak. Which quickly disappeared when Sehun grabbed her phone from her hands and smashed it to the ground.

Your hand, which was holding onto your stomach, now moved to your mouth as you watched in surprise and honestly a little fear. Your boyfriend was breathing heavily and had his eyes closed, most likely to calm himself from doing anything other than breaking the girl's phone.

"If you ever," he started saying lowly, "and I mean ever, hurt her or try to lay a hand on her again I will not go easy on you. But I want your names and contacts, all of them, because I'm suing you. And I don't ever want you to call yourselves my fans again, because a true fan would not do this to someone I love. Someone the whole group loves."

You stayed on the ground waiting as the girls sniffled and apologized to you and Sehun, gave  him their information, and then scurried off. Heartbroken. You watched your boyfriend with worry as he paced back and forth while on the phone with his manager, telling him the information and not taking no for an answer about suing them. He was royally pissed and you smiled slightly knowing that he did this for you, that your fear of him picking his fans over you instantly disappeared when you saw him fight for you. It made you fall in love with him all over again and you didn't notice the smile still on your face as Sehun crouched in front of you, examining you closely to see what all they had hurt.

"I'm taking you to the hospital," he said and the way he said it you knew it was an order, not a suggestion. So you just nodded and almost laughed when you saw him look at you with confusion. "Why are you smiling?" He asked you cautiously.

You grabbed his face and leaned forward, kissing him softly then wincing and pulling back quickly from the pain in your stomach. "Oh crap that backfired," you wheezed out before letting out a small chuckle. Then you saw Sehun looking you over, concern etched all over his face, so you grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze. "I love you."

He sighed and cracked a smile, bringing your hand up and giving you a kiss on the back of your hand. "I love you too. Please, don't ever let something like this happen again. Tell me if you get anymore hate, because I honestly thought my heart was going to stop when I saw them hurting you."

"Okay," you paused all of a sudden though and looked at him with confusion. "Wait a minute, how'd you know I was getting hate?"

"Uh, you left your phone in the bag I had and it kept going off so I got curious and checked it. I don't like that you kept that from me though, jagi. I need to know those things."

"Okay, I'm sorry. I just thought you wouldn't believe me, and I didn't want to hurt you since your fans are precious to you."

He cut you off by leaning his forehead against your own. "Those weren't fans baby. If they don't accept you then they don't accept me, and that means they aren't true fans. Now come on," he said as he picked you up. "Let's get you to the hospital."

Then after placing you in his manager's car, which you had not noticed pulled up, the three of you headed off to the hospital. Where Sehun had spent the time doing whatever you asked and made sure you listened to the doctors orders, getting some rest, and cuddled you the rest of the night. It was nice.

Let Me(Mark) pt.2

Requested by: SiaSuYee

I just want to let all of you know that it is literally so hard for me to write imagines for Mark bc this man right here ^^ yeah...he's my ultimate bias and my heart is seriously hurting as I'm writing for him x'D  Btw i'm just going to use (y/n) for this one, in the first part I used the requested name but it was someone else who requested a part two so like I said..I'm just using (y/n) xD

~I see you reflected in today's sunlight, you are crazily radiant. You plant the sun in my heart. Let's you and I be together today~

It's been almost half a year since Mark convinced you to talk to Yugyeom about your difficult past, and you now thank him everyday because of it. Since that day Yugyeom and yourself had gotten even closer than you were before and you tell each other everything, it was as if he wasn't just your little brother but your best friend as well and it was nice. Mark and you? Well, let's just say today he's taking you on a date to celebrate your third month-iversary, as he calls it.

It was honestly going good, you both got a long great and you were comfortable around each other. You've had little disagreements but that's all they were, and they weren't anything huge or damaging. And every night Mark will send you a text in the middle of the night to make sure you were alright in case you would have a nightmare, and even though they were slowly disappearing they still came and it made you feel reassured to know what he was doing. It made you realize that no matter what others would say he honestly really did like you, and you him.

~Will you be by my side, by my side. Can I hold your hand? Don't be shy today we come together. Today you are especially lovely to me. Tonight is our Just one chance. Can I hug you? Don't be afraid today we come together~

"Y/n!! Hyung's here!!" You rushed to finish getting your stuff together when you heard Yugyeom's warning, slightly out of breath from all the running around you had just done you scolded yourself about not working out lately.

You headed down the small staircase and smiled at your handsome boyfriend, who was currently leaning on the counter talking with Yugyeom.

"Alright Yuggie-ah, I'll be home soon." And with a quick hug from Yugyeom, both you and Mark were out the door and walking to his car. "So fish, where we headed?" [I am totally using the fact that he called us his tunas on asc bc of a typo lol x'D]

He laughed at my nickname and reached over the center console to grab hold of my hand before answering me. "I can't tell you, it's a surprise."

You narrowed your eyes at the now nervous male and glowered at him. "You know I hate surprises." And you did, you were a very curious person so you always had a problem with getting surprises. Especially around holidays such as your birthday or Christmas, you always found out what you would have and it pissed everyone off. You thought it was funny seeing them so mad though.

~Let me hold your hand atop this blue ocean, look at me baby. Hug me now lady you drive me crazy. With the cool breeze, the two of us. Let me hold your hand, embrace me atop this blue ocean. Embrace me now with the cool breeze, the two of us~

"Don't look at me like that," he laughed out as he squeezed your hand. You smiled, he knew a;; your looks and when you would use them and that amused you. "Tonight is supposed to be special though, so please don't ask questions?"

You sighed, deciding to let him win this one you silently turned your gaze out the window to let him know you wouldn't pry. He squeezed your hand from thanks and you smiled, keeping your gaze towards the buildings you were passing by. Still curious though, you looked around quietly and tried to figure out where your boyfriend could be headed that was so 'special'.

Your investigation was cut short though when Mark pulled the car over on the side of a dark street, literally it had no street lights or anything.

"Uhm, Mark?" You said as you nervously looked over to him, just now realizing he had gotten out of the car and was opening your door. "Oh, you surprised me."

He smiled and reached out his hand, helping you up and out, then turned you around to face the car which confused you even more.

~It might have been the bright sun my face turned red probably, it might have been just a feeling I saw you blush too. I'm getting drunk on a good feeling today, neither of us even touched alcohol. Can I softly hold your hand? If you're ok, can I go for it? Baby let me hold your hand~

"Oh~kay? What the hell is going o-Mark! What the hell?!" You screeched as your vision was turned dark by the blindfold your boyfriend just placed over your eyes.

"It's okay, I'm keeping the place a secret until we get there remember? This way you won't guess or find out, and no peeking," he said as he hit your hand down from where it was tugging the edge upwards.

"Ugh, you're so mean," you pouted which made Mark chuckle and tug you closer since his arm was around your waist.

"But you love me," you heard him say before you felt him peck your cheek.

"You're lucky I do boo," you said with sass which only made him laugh louder. You didn't care though, you loved listening to his laugh. That's why you were always saying and doing stupid crap. Just so he would laugh. Jesus you were whipped.

"Okay, jagi step up a little. There you go. Okay, now we're going to the left." Mark led you like that until you felt his touch disappear completely, which just made you start mentally panicking as you tried to reach out for him.

"Mark?! Mark, this isn't funny. Mark!" Your voice was slowly getting more pitched, it was fine under the blindfold if he was touching you or you could hear him but now it was silent and your fear was starting to grow. "Mar-"

"Shh, jagiya it's okay. I'm right here! I'm sorry baby, I had to make sure the table was still reserved." He hugged you to his chest, blindfold still over your eyes which you were thankful for as you willed the tears to go away.

~Will you be by my side, by my side. Can I hold your hand? Don't be shy, today we come together. Today you are especially lovely to me, tonight is our Just one chance. Can I hug you? Don't be afraid, today we come together~

"I'm sorry," you muttered into his chest that he was still pressing you against, while he rubbed your back silently.

"No, don't apologize. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left you like that, I forgot about your fear. I'm sorry, baby."

You smiled as you looked up at him, well not actually looked since you had the blindfold still over your eyes so it probably looked very strange. You heard him chuckle and felt his hands on your hips, turning you around so your back was pressed against his chest. "Take the blindfold off now," he said lowly in your ear.

You quickly listened and tore it off your head, before looking at the lovely scene set out in front of you. Mark had gotten them to set candles and rose petals around the table and you just noticed your favorite ballad song playing softly in the background. "Mark this is-" You stopped and shook your head, trying to come up with the right words. "This is beautiful," you said before turning and wrapping your arms around his waist and squeezed tight.

"I'm glad you like it, the food's even better."

And with that you both headed to the table, him pulling your chair out like the perfect gentleman he was, and looked to the waiter as he brought your course out. You smelled and realized that Mark had ordered your favorite meal here, which just so happened to be your favorite restaurant.  

~Let me hold your hand atop this blue ocean, look at me baby. Hug me now lady you drive me crazy. With the cool breeze, the two of us. Let me hold your hand, embrace me atop this blue ocean. Embrace me now with the cool breeze, the two of us~

"Wait," you said looking to Mark with a confused expression, "Did you take a different route just so I wouldn't know?"

He nodded absently, paying attention to the food now set in front of him. He was smart, you'd give him that. You smiled and knew that he would be around for a while, you knew it because just by him doing that shows how much he knows and cares about you. It might sound confusing and stupid but it was there, in the way he made this a surprise for you. You hated surprises but maybe surprises like this wouldn't be so bad sometimes.

"Oh by the way," Mark said after he swallowed and turned his attention back to you. "I expect you to surprise me next time," he told you with a wink.

Your mouth and eyes widened in surprise, but you laughed and decided to play along. "Hmm~ I don't think I could do that though."

"Oh? Wae?"

You smirked at him, "Who knows what'll change between then and now. What if I can't think about anything to surprise you, besides you know I hate them."

"Yes," he smirked himself, "But you love me."

~Will you hold my hand baby? Hold my hand wherever you go, please don't let go I will cherish you baby. I will make memories everyday. Will you believe me now? Don't listen to what other people say, will you for me? I follow your heart so girl just let me hold your hand~

You froze, literally not able to do anything. He noticed, "Jagi are you okay?" He sighed and stood, walking over to where I sat before pulling me sideways in my chair and kneeling in front of me. "Y/f/n, I love you. With all my heart. And I thank Yugyeom and I thank your parents everyday for bringing you into my life, because since I've met you my life has turned right-side up and I'm thankful for it. I don't know if you feel comfortable enough to say it yet or not, if not that's fine, but I wanted you to know that I do in fact lov-"

You cut him off, no you didn't get up and run or just shushed him. On the contrary, you grabbed his face and kissed him. You knew you loved him, but it was still surprising to hear him say it. So you were going to show him before you actually confessed. Smiling in satisfaction you pulled away and looked down at the dazed Mark in your palms.

"I love you too, fish."

~Atop this blue ocean, look at me baby. Hug me now lady you drive me crazy with the cool breeze, the two of us. Let me hold your hand, embrace me atop this blue ocean. Embrace me now with the cool breeze, the two of us. Oh Let me hold your hand. Atop this blue ocean, look at me baby. Hug me now lady you drive me crazy with the cool breeze, the two of us. Let me hold your hand, embrace me atop this blue ocean. Embrace me now with the cool breeze, the two of us~

My Home(Yugyeom-Got7)

Requested by: koreabootrash

~When I go into my unlit room all lonely, I take my shoes off and the door rings. It sounds like you calling out to me, I'm automatically completely disarmed. It's like eating love like honey. Embrace me more cozily I want it. Baby What u know, I love you girl, you make me feel like home. Every time you do that do that, you make me feel it feel it. Other women are no, you are in my eyes. Yeah you know I like it. Every time you do that do that, you make me feel it feel it. My home is you you you you you~

Bzzt. Bzzt.

You quickly grabbed your vibrating phone from the coffee table and answered it. "Hello?"

"Hey, y/n!"

"Yugyeommie!!" You smiled widely as you heard his voice on the other end of the line, the voice you've been waiting to hear all morning. "I was waiting for your call~" You said, now pretending to be upset.

"Oh? Mian, JB hyung suddenly called a group meeting."

"Oh? Do you have something to do today suddenly?"

"Nope, I'm all yours for the day~"

"Jinja?!"

"Mhm," you heard him chuckle when he heard you squeal. "So, what did you want to do today?"

"Hmm? I thought we were just going to hang out today?"

"Yeah," his tone turned sad and you understood why. The both of you couldn't even go on a proper date since your relationship was still a secret from everyone, including the boys. They knew about you but they all thought you and Yugyeom were just friends. But as long as you got to spend time with Yugyeom, even if it wasn't a lot, you didn't mind.

~You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are just my home, You are my home girl. You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are my home, girl. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy~

After 20 minutes you heard your doorbell ring and hurried to open it, only to reveal not just your boyfriend but two of his group mates. Jackson and BamBam gave you a quick hug as they came in and you turned to Yugyeom, raising your eyebrow in confusion. He tilted his head and motioned for you to follow him then turned and called out to the boys that he needed to talk to you, after heading back into your room and shutting the door after you were in.

As soon as the door was shut you found yourself wrapped in his arms as he hugged you to him, laying his chin on your head and softly swaying back and forth. "I missed you," he said quietly to you making you smile and wrap your own arms around his waist.

"I missed you too, but I thought it was going to be an us day?"

"Yeah, but when I told the guys that I was coming over here those two begged to come. Even if I said no they'd end up following me anyways." You sighed, knowing he was right and that you wouldn't have him all to yourself today. "Hey, jagi I'm sorry. I really am. You know how much I wanted today to just be you and me."

"Yeah I know, and I understand. I just hate those two sometimes."

He laughed at you and kissed the top of your head before letting you go and grabbing onto your hand. "Come on, we better head back out there before they come in here."

~2:30AM in the morning on my way home. TGIF, everyone else is going out to party. My message alarm is blowing up, even the ringtone is making me tired. It's late but a lot of people are trying to contact me, a lot of people are asking me to come and liven it up. But I go straight to you under my favorites. I'll turn off all the applications that don't have to do with you. Every time you do that do that, you make me feel it feel it. Other women are no, you are in my eyes. Yeah you know I like it. Every time you do that do that, you make me feel it feel it. My home is you you you you you~

30 minutes later and you were sitting slouched down on your couch, rubbing your temple from the sudden headache that had appeared from they boys screaming at each other while playing their game. It was so bad that you had honestly thought about just kicking them all out of your house, yes including your boyfriend since he was screaming along with him. Currently it was Jackson against BamBam and Jackson was letting his anger towards BamBam winning known.

You felt the couch dip and felt yourself lean towards the person now sitting next to you, and after opening your eyes you found it to be Yugyeom smiling gently down at you. You raised an eyebrow at him then glanced towards the other boys, who were oblivious to how close Yugyeom was next to me. Yugyeom surprised you though by leaning over and placing a quick kiss on your cheek, making your eyes widen in panic and causing you to look over to the boys. Relief filled you though when you saw they were still focused on their game and weren't paying the least bit of attention to the pair of you sitting on the couch.

"Headache?" Yugyeom whispered as he wrapped his arm around the back of your shoulder, low enough so the boys wouldn't notice unless they looked over to you two.

You nodded in response and leaned slightly more towards him, glad for his comfort.

"One sec," he said before he got up and headed into the hallway. Then returned after a couple minutes with your migraine pill bottle in his hand. "How many do you take again?"

"Just one," you said smiling at him. Then thanking him you took the pill from his offered hand and swallowed it down with the water bottle he offered you.

He sat back down next to you and started to converse with BamBam who was now shouting out his victory, bragging in Jackson's face who was sitting slouched with defeat on the floor. Shaking your head at them you couldn't help but think about what their reactions would be when you and Yugyeom decide to actually tell them about your relationship. You glanced over to Yugyeom while he was laughing and admired his smile, his features, admired the fact that he had asked you out.

~You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are just my home, You are my home girl. You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are my home, girl. When I go home after a tiring day. You take the weight off my shoulders, when I see you. I put my legs on the sofa, kicked back relax. Hot hot bath time just lay back. You are the vitamin of my life, my girl!. I want to show you off to the whole world. You will always be by my side Baby you yeah you are just my home~

"Oooo~ y/n is staring at Yugyeom! What? Starting to crush on him?" Jackson asked playfully, making your eyes widen and your cheeks start to heaten.

"Shut up!" You said as you threw a pillow and hit him in the head with it, making everyone laugh.

You looked to Yugyeom out of the corner of your eye and saw him smiling down at you, actually it was more of a smirk now that you looked at it. That little- He was laughing at you! You narrowed your eyes and stood up, walking over to where BamBam was sitting and plopped down next to him. Let's show him, you thought to yourself as you put a small pout on your face and looked over to BamBam.

"Oppa~ They're being mean to me!" You called out as you pouted up at him, almost laughing when he smiled down at you. No one could resist the pout that much was known since it's helped you get out of many situations with the guys.

"Oh? Well, don't worry. Oppa will protect you!"

You let out a chuckle and then gladly accepted BamBam's hug, peeking over to where Yugyeom was sitting with a blank face. Since you knew him so well though you knew what he was doing, he was glaring at BamBam's arms. Anyone probably wouldn't notice it since it was subtle but you could tell that your plan was working. Of course said plan got even better when Jackson decided to pitch in and jump on top of the two of you, laying on top.

You groaned at the sudden extra weight and tried to push him off. "Ugh, Oppa~ Get off! I can't breathe!"

Jackson faked a gasp and layed his hand on his chest, "Are you saying I'm fat?"

You rolled your eyes and looked over to BamBam who was also struggling to get Jackson's body off of us. "BamBam," you whispered. Then you started to mouth a countdown and after reaching three you both used what strength you had and managed to push Jackson off onto the floor. Then letting out cries of victory you collapsed back on the couch and let out a sigh, pretending that you had used too much energy.

~You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are just my home, You are my home girl. You are atop my bed, together we are cozy. You are glamorous like the inside of my closet. You are just my home. You are my home, You are my home. You are my home, girl~

Jackson pouted up at you and rubbed his back, "Yah! I'm not fat or heavy!"

"No, you're not fat but you are heavy!" You complained as you pouted back at him.

"Hyung, she's right. You're not fat but you're heavy. Too much muscle," BamBam whispered over to me making me laugh.

You were so busy with the other two you never even noticed that Yugyeom had moved from his previous spot on the couch. "Hyung," he called out to Jackson, "JB hyung said he needs you and BamBam for something."

"No~" They both whined as Jackson grabbed a leg and BamBam grabbed onto my arm. Which neither helped Yugyeom's aggravation the least bit.

"Uhm, you guys should probably go though. You don't want JB to be angry."

At the thought of an angry leader the pair quickly got up and rushed to the front door, calling out goodbyes along the way, then they were out the door and headed back to their dorm leaving you with an aggravated boyfriend. You gave him a small smile as he stood above you, you still seated on the couch.

"Hi," you said trying to act cute to get him to calm down.

"I know what you were doing, don't pretend to be innocent."

"I don't kno-"

"Y/n," him calling out your name made you quickly stop your sentence and lose the smile on your face. You heard him sigh and sit beside you on the couch, then bring you closer to him and he wrapped his arms around you. "I've been thinking about telling them."

~You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy. You're my one and only home girl, I'll be your one and only home boy~

You looked up to him with big eyes, unsure of what you wanted to do. In the end if things went bad then Yugyeom could loose chances of being with the guys he loved like his own brothers and you didn't want to be the cause of that happening. "Yugye-"

"Shh," he said softly as he cupped your cheek and stared into your eyes. "I-I want to tell them. I want everyone to know that we're going out. I don't want to hide it anymore. I want to be able to take you out on proper dates, and I don't want to ever see you and the guys that close again."

You raised your eyebrows in surprise and looked over to him with uncertainty. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I don't want to hide us anymore. I love you, y/n, and I want the world to know it."

You smiled and kissed his cheek, "When did you become such a man?"

"Maybe when BamBam had his arms wrapped around you and Jackson was laying on top of you?" He smirked over at you, "Just a guess though."

You laughed and layed your head on his shoulder, "If you're sure than I am too. But if anything goes wrong I don-"

"Nothing's going to go wrong, besides everyone already loves you."

So you spent the rest of day watching movies and snuggling, what you usually do when you have a 'date' but somehow it never got old or tiring. You loved being snuggled up next to him and just relaxing, to you that was the best date.

"You know, even if we announce our relationship I still want dates like this."

He laughed and gave you a quick kiss, "Yeah same. I don't get to relax much so we'll definitely be doing this more."

Rainy Day(B-Joo-TOPP DOGG)

~Love is always like a monsoon that comes and goes, it stays for a while and leaves to someplace else. Sweet rain falls for a moment and stops~

You stared out the window, watching as the droplets of rain slid down the glass pane and fell onto the ground. Distantly you heard your phone ring but ignored it, not wanting to move from your spot and not wanting to talk to anyone. You continued to stare out the window and watch the rain fall, much like how yours tears were falling down your cheeks. Sighing, you wiped your cheeks dry yet again then groaned in frustration as more fell.

"I knew you wouldn't answer." You jumped and turned around to see your best friend, Shin Jiho standing in the doorway. Or, as he's also known as Xero. He smile fell when he saw your wet cheeks and puffy red eyes, kneeling in front of you and grabbing your hands.

You didn't pull away but you turned your head, not wanting him to see you crying and then tell the others. "What are you doing here?"

~The sun has gotten too long, I pray that rain falls on this dry city. The only way I can feel you is the rain that drenches me~

"Where else am I supposed to be when my best friend is crying?" He pulled me up then sat down where I was preciously, then he pulled me onto his lap and layed my head on his chest. "It's okay. I'm here now, you're not alone."

The tears started to fall faster as you let yourself feel the grief and pain, finally wanting to cry since you weren't alone. This is why you loved Jiho, ever since you guys had become close friends when you were kids he was always there for you no matter what.

After a little while, the tears finally seemed to stop and you felt like your chest was lighter. Like a burden was taken away from you, leaving you to feel more at peace. Of course, you didn't think you could ever truly feel better ever since you lost him. You didn't even want to think about that night, the night where everything that was so right went so wrong so quickly.

~Every day, every night, in my eyes rain still falls. I wish this rain was a light shower, but it feels like a long monsoon. Why is that?~

"The guys are worried about you," Xero muttered into your hair while rubbing your back. "You want to go see them?"

You kept looking down listening to his heartbeat that was steady, slowly calming down more and more until you were able to breathe regularly. "I don't think seeing them would be be-"

"You know they don't blame you, right? It wasn't your fault y/n, don't you see that?" He grabbed your chin and made you look up at him, his eyes showing honesty and hurt. "None of us blame you, it was an accident. And if he was here, he wouldn't blame you either so you shouldn't blame yourself."

"I was driving the car Jiho, I could have prevented that wreck! I should have died instead of Byungjoo!"

~It feels like you'll come from somewhere. Will you fall like a rain shower? That's just my hopes, it's too late~

Tears welled up in your eyes again and you stood up, angered. Jiho stood up right behind you and grabbed onto your shoulders, making you look into his eyes. "It wasn't your fault, y/n! Stop blaming yourself. Byungjoo wouldn't want you to be like this! If he saw you like this, wanting to be dead, how do you think he'd feel? Huh?"

"It doesn't matter does it?" You said as you stared at him blankly. "He isn't here anymore."

You knocked Jiho's arms off your shoulders and ran into your bathroom, making sure to lock the door behind you. You heard Jiho pounding on the door, trying to reason with you and get you out so you wouldn't be alone. Blocking everything out you slid down the wall and onto the floor, pulling your knees to your chest and silently crying. The banging had stopped and so had the shouting, making you pick up your head and place your chin on your arms.

It doesn't matter does it? He isn't here anymore, "And it's all my fault." You whispered to yourself as you closed your eyes.

~When rain falls on my lips it feels like I can touch you, feels like I can catch you. The rain resembles you~

flashback

"Yah, jagi! Come here, quickly!"

You rushed downstairs, worried that something had happened. "What is it Byungjoo?"

You saw him standing in the doorway with the door wide open as he pointed out to the sky. "It's raining!!"

Staring blankly at him you tried to understand what it was that he was so excited about. "Uh huh, shut the door and come in or you'll catch a cold."

You turned and started to walk back upstairs to finish your work when you felt a hand on your arm, stopping you and turning you around to face a smiling Byunjoo. "Come on." He said simply making you look at him with confusion.

"Huh?"

"Come on!" He said, starting to pull you out of the house and out into the rain.

~The sunlight has gotten wet, I hate the rain so much. I try to forget you but you keep falling, stop it~

"B-Joo! What are you doing?! We're getting soaked, and I'm not even wearing shoes."

"So?!" You could barely hear him over the sound of the rain falling hard onto the ground.

"We're going to get sick!"

"So? That's why we have each other right? To be there for one another? Come on baby, live a little! Have some fun," he told you as he jumped into a puddle and made sure to splash you.

You shrieked and jumped back then stared at him, "What the hell B-Joo?!"

He laughed and grabbed your hand, twirling you around and then pulling you towards him and starting to dance. You tried to hold your laughter in, not wanting him to win, but eventually you couldn't hold it in anymore and started to laugh as he spun you around. He pulled you to a stop, you pressed against his chest and looking up into his eyes.

"I love you, jagi." He said before he leaned down and kissed you, making this a night you would never forget.

~It's like this every day after you left. All day, rainy day. It's because it's raining~

~~

"Are you serious? I've been busting my butt working to help pay the frikin bills, and I'm tired. I told you I didn't want to go to that thing tonight!!" Byungjoo shouted at you as he stood in the middle of the room.

"You don't think I'm tired? I've been working too, Byungjoo! It's not just you trying to pay bills, and we promised my parents that we'd go tonight over three months ago! You're going to break your promise just because you're tired one night? Is that how little my family and I mean to you?!"

He shook his head and looked away from me, "I don't know why I ever married you." Your eyes widened and he turned, stomping into the bathroom to change.

You hurriedly wiped your eyes and headed downstairs to get your keys and bag in order. You glanced upstairs , listening as you heard him turn the shower on and then started to silently let the tears fall. Lately, your marriage hadn't been going so well due to the fact that you both always had insane work hours and when you finally were together you both were either too tired or didn't feel like doing anything. But to hear him say that, it really hurt you.

~Coming from a long way it was so hard for us to meet, but breaking up was so easy. Each of us had different ways of hurting, it was just the difference of weight. We're strangers now, it's over now~

The silence in the car was becoming unbearable as you drove to your parents house, Byungjoo sitting beside and glaring out the window at the rain. You sighed quietly as you focused your attention back on the road, not realizing that there were tears falling down your cheeks. Neither of you said anything, you too scared to break the tension more so than not wanting to speak. It had started to rain harder and between your eyes being blurry from your tears and the rain hitting the windshield, it was getting harder to see the road.

You felt the car hit a puddle and swerve slightly, making you shriek and grab tightly onto the wheel. "God, can't you even drive?!" Byungjoo stopped short when he saw how you looked. Your eyes were red now from the tears, your cheeks had tear streaks, and you were shaking. He felt his heart break, realizing it was his fault you were like this and wanting to take everything he said back.

He hadn't meant any of it, he loved you more than anything in the world but he was just too tired. He noticed that you had bags under your eyes from sleep deprivation, and felt even worse knowing that you had in fact been having a rough time as well. He reached over and tried to grab your hand, failing when you hit his hand away and grabbed the steering wheel tighter.

~Every day every night, it's useless. The weather said it'd be different today but it was wrong. Look at my head, drenched with your thoughts. Are you with someone else, somewhere?~

"Jagi," he said softly to try to calm you down. "Hey, jagi I'm sorry. Here, pull over and I'll drive okay?"

You ignored him and continued to keep your attention on the road, frustratingly wiping your tears as you tried to see better. Byungjoo grabbed your hand successfully this time and pulled it up to his face, kissing the back of your hand and gently squeezing it.

"I'm sorry, jagi."

"How could you say that?" You said through new tears, not looking at him.

He closed his eyes, his heart breaking even more when he heard your hoarse voice. "I didn't mean it baby. I was tired and aggravated. Not once have I wished that we weren't married, and not once have I regretted marrying you! That was the best decision I have ever made, and I'm so sorry that I've hurt you."

~It feels like you'll come from somewhere. Will you fall like a rain shower? That's just my hopes, it's too late~

You stayed quiet, wanting to forgive him but not really sure if he was telling the truth. You loved him, of course you did, but his words had really hurt you and you weren't sure if he was telling the truth or just saying this cause he felt guilty.

"Baby, please pull over so we can talk. I don't want you driving when you're upset."

You sighed and turned on your turning signal, checking you mirrors and over you shoulder more than once before pulling onto the shoulder. After the car was off Byungjoo unbuckled his seat belt and grabbed your face, pulling you into a kiss that showed you how sorry he was. He pulled back slightly, pushing a strand of hair back as he smiled at you and studied your face.

"God, you're so beautiful. I don't think I have ever seen anyone as beautiful as you." You blushed and hid your smile as you playfully pushed him away.

"Shut up, sweet words won't get you forgiven this time."

~When rain falls on my lips it feels like I can touch you, feels like I can catch you. The rain resembles you.The sunlight has gotten wet, I hate the rain so much. I try to forget you but you keep falling, stop it. It's like this every day after you left. All day, rainy day. It's because it's raining~

"No? Hmm," he smiled widely and layed his chin in his palm. "What if we go out in the rain and dance like we did three years ago."

Your eyes widened and you quickly looked over to him. "You still remember that?"

"Of course I remember that, we were sick for a week after that." He laughed loudly, making you chuckle and play with your hands. "That's not why I remember it though." You looked over at him confused and saw him staring at you, serious and smiling softly. "I remember that you looked so beautiful with that rain falling down around you. I remember how alive you looked as you twirled around, your hair hitting your face but you didn't care. You just kept smiling and laughing, you looked so beautiful that night, and it made me realize just how lucky I was to have you in my life."

He wiped the tears away that had fallen while you listened to him, falling in love with him all over again. "Okay," you mumbled, "Maybe sweet words will get you forgiven."

He chuckled and leaned over, kissing you once again as you smiled and forgave him. "Okay, okay." You chuckled as you pulled back, motioning for him to put his seat belt on. Once he did, you turned your turning signal on once again and made a quick u-turn once the road was clear.

~After the rain stops maybe you're sorry, maybe. It feels like you're going to come back. Always at that place, on this street we met for the first time, just come back to me~

He looked over to you confused when you did and asked, "Wait a second. Where are we going? I thought we had to get to your parents?"

You smirked over at him. "I'll just tell them you caught the flu."

His eyes widened as he watched you with shock, "You'd lie to your parents?"

You laughed and patted his hand, "Oh please. It's not like you wanted to go anyways."

"I would've gone for you, I'd go anywhere for you."

You looked over to him out of the corner of your eyes, not understanding how someone so amazing could exist. God, you loved him so much and you smiled and he grabbed your hand. The one second you looked over to him, you saw his eyes widen and he started to shout. "Y/n, watch out!"

You quickly turned your head back to the road and saw a truck in your lane, heading towards you. Turning the wheel you tried to get out of the way, not making it sadly as the truck slammed into the side of your car and made it flip. Byungjo reached out and grabbed your hand, squeezing tight as he screamed for you to hold on.

~When rain falls on my lips it feels like I can touch you, feels like I can catch you. The rain resembles you~

flashback ended

You wiped your eyes as you recalled the last time you saw him, panic on his face as he pointed out the truck that had been the cause of Byungjoo's death. You knew it wasn't your fault, it was an accident but you couldn't help but blame yourself. It had been almost half a year since that dreaded accident, but the scar was still fresh and every time someone brought it up it just got deeper and deeper.

You felt a blanket being wrapped around your frame, making you look up and see Jiho sitting on the floor beside you with his arm now around your shoulders pulling you towards him. He didn't say anything, just kept his arm around you as you two sat in the silence and thought about Byunjoo. All the good times you all have had played through your mind, making you faintly smile and lay your head on Jiho's shoulder.

"I'm sorry," you whispered into the air quietly to Byungjoo. Jiho said nothing, just tightened his grip on your shoulder. You both turned your heads towards the bathroom window when you heard everything go silent. Standing, you walked to the window and saw that the rain and clouds had disappeared letting the sunlight shine through the window and warm your figure.

"Lookie there," Jiho said over your shoulder as he too looked outside. "I told you he doesn't blame you."

You smiled and layed your palm flat on the now warming glass, closing your eyes and letting out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding. I love you, always.

~The sunlight has gotten wet, I hate the rain so much. I try to forget you but you keep falling, stop it. It's like this every day after you left. All day, rainy day. It's because it's raining~

U(Seung Jun-KNK)

~I hate you but I need you. I hate you but I miss you. Your beautiful and dazzling eyes, it doesn't shine anymore. Your warm lips speak coldly now~

His POV:

"Hyung, how're you feeling?"

I ignored Jihun, instead focusing my attention solely on the picture frame I held in my palms. The picture that was trapped in between the glass and back piece, the picture of you and me on our three year anniversary. I smiled as I looked at you, remembering how you always managed to look so beautiful even when you said that you didn't try. We were both happy, with huge smiles on our faces as we looked to the camera.

I faintly heard Jihun let out a sigh then walk out of the room, leaving me to be alone. In the room I've locked myself in since you left. I've barely eaten, only when the guys can convince me to. I just sit there, staring at our pictures, at the life we used to share together, and hating myself for letting you go. There was no way I could make you stay though, and I hated myself for that. I hated you, hated you for making me love you so much that I feel like I've lost a part of me completely now that you're gone.

~You, I'm sorry baby say goodbye. I hate you. My hands can't let go of you, my heart still calls out to you. No matter how much I stretch out I can't reach you, that's how far your heart has gotten. I can't hold onto you~

I remember that night, the fight we had about the stupidest little thing then you stormed off crying after I said words I didn't mean. When I told you that I hated you, that I hated our relationship, your face crumpled. I hated seeing it, it hurt me so much watching how my words affected you. Words that I never even meant, but that is the price I have to pay for making you leave. Making you run into your car when it was storming and drive away.

I don't mind living with the guilt, it makes me remember you and I love that. I love living in our memories, remembering our fights then our make-ups. Remembering the way you felt in my arms though, that's my favorite. Sometimes, I honestly felt like if I closed my eyes I could feel your warmth against me. That's what I miss the most, not being able to hold you.

I hated the fact that I'll never get to wake up and see you in the morning, sleeping soundly with little snores escaping. They were cute and they made me love you even more. I remember on our days off, you'd wake me up by giving me little kisses all over my face. I'd smile and wake up, then I'd hug you to me and give you a long kiss. One that would show you how much I loved having you there. And then I messed everything up, and now I'll never be able to experience those things again.

~It's over, why am I the only one hurting? It's over, I curse at you and hate you but in the end, I'm calling out to you again. Hurry and hold me~

"Can't you do just help out around here once?! I'm not asking you to clean the whole flipping house, but it would be nice if you could stop playing your stupid games and help out once or twice!"

I watched as you screamed at me, finally getting fed up with how I acted around here. "Well, I'm sorry that I go to work and want to come home and do nothing but relax! What the hell happened to this relationship?! You ruined it by nagging so frikin much! Jeez, and you know what if you don't like that then get the hell out, because I'm the one who owns this house not you and I'm tired of you doing this crap!"

"Fine," you said as you wiped your eyes and walked into the front foyer. Then after grabbing your wallet, jacket, and phone you left the house.

Now that I think about it, she was right to yell at me about not helping out. I didn't and now I can't do anything to make it right because you were gone. I still curse that car, curse God for making it rain, curse myself for being the reason you left crying. I miss you, so so much. I'm so sorry, I can't ever tell you how sorry I am. With that last thought, I drifted off into a nightmare filled sleep clutching our picture to my chest.

~Hurry and save me from this endless maze, take me out of this darkness without any light. Everything has stopped. My watch is broken, it's ticking in place. I'll be waiting for you~

"Hyung!" I ignored the voice, not really knowing where it was coming from.

"Seungjun!! Seungjun, wake up!"

I bolted up, sweating and gasping for air as Youjin and Jihun were kneeling beside me. They were looking at me with concern and wide eyes, though they knew this wasn't the first time I've had nightmares. Not even close to being the first time. I have them every time I close my eyes, even if I just rest them I see you dying in my arms every time. I didn't really understand it, I wasn't even near you when you died.

"Seungjun are you alright? Was it the nightmare again?"

I couldn't find my voice so I just settled for nodding, wiping my forehead as I let out a shaky breath. I felt Jihun rub my back and closed my eyes in relief, so glad to know that I wasn't alone. I felt tears start to form in the corners of my eyes, but I held them back since I didn't want them to see me break. I didn't deserve anyone's reassurance, I didn't deserve people telling me that it would be okay.

~I can't do anything without you, I close my eyes but I still see you. The more time passes, the deeper my longing grows. In there, I'm drawing you out~

"Hyung, it-"

"Don't! Don't tell me it's going to be okay! It's not going to be okay, and I don't want it to be okay!" I shouted as I stood from the bed and walked to my dressers.

"Seungjun, what are you doing?"

"I'm going out for a while. I need to clear my head, and I don't like taking it out on you guys so I need to be alone."

Youjin sighed and layed his hand on my shoulder, "Alright. If you need anything call us, okay?"

I nodded, keeping my head down since I didn't want to look at them. I didn't want them to see my face, the look of determination as I gathered my clothes and got ready. I was done, done living with this regret and grief. I'd decided to finally get rid of this pain, but I wasn't going to tell them that. I just wanted to see you again, to hold you in my arms once more and bury my nose in your hair. I'd do anything to feel that again and to be able to smell your shampoo.

~It's over, why am I the only one hurting? It's over, I curse at you and hate you but. In the end, I'm calling out to you again. Hurry and hold me~

-time skip-

I stood at the edge, looking out over the water as I debated my decision once more. Did I really want to do this? Leave my friends and family behind, but be able to see you once more. I did, and so I stepped over the railing but my hands kept their hold. I looked out once more, closing my eyes as I felt the wind push against me as if it were trying to get me to go back. To not make this decision.

But I didn't, I'd made my decision and I planned on going through with it. I was tired, sick and tired of not having you here. Of being the reason why you weren't here. And if I were to be honest, I was excited and happy at the thought of getting to see you again. My eyes widened as lightning suddenly stroke across the sky, then watched in disbelief and wonder as it started to rain. Hard.

Well, isn't this ironic? It must be fate that it started to rain. I closed my eyes, your perfect face etching itself into my mind once more as I felt myself relax. I was ready, ready to accept this. Ready to see you. And so, I started to let go of the railing.

~I need you, come back to me so I can breathe again, I don't care if it hurts. I only need you, I need you. I need you U, U, U, U. I need you U, U, U, U. I need you U, U, U, U. I only need you, I need you, I need you~

"No!"

My eyes popped open when I heard your voice, and I was starting to believe that I had actually gone mad. That losing you and then missing you had actually brought me to lunacy. But that proved to be wrong when I saw your sweet face above me. I noticed that you were talking to me, but I couldn't focus. You were here. You were in front of me and I wanted nothing more to grab you and kiss you. So that's what I did.

I grabbed your face and gave you a long kiss, showing you how much I missed you. How much I love you. How much regret I had about that night. And you accepted it, you accepted me. Then after pulling away you cupped my cheeks and wiped away the tears I had not noticed had fallen. You smiled at me and I felt like my soul had been replenished just seeing the sight.

~Your voice that called out to me, your warm eyes, all of you. It still remains so clearly with me but where are you? Where are you now? I can't live without you. I hate you but I need you. I hate you but I miss you~

You shook your head and layed your forehead against mine, closing your eyes as I stared at you. Etching everything onto my mind so I would never forget, not that I had to anymore. I smiled as you opened your eyes, and I stared into them remembering how much I loved getting lost in them.

"It's not time, Seungjun." I looked to you confused, wondering why I couldn't speak. Wondering what you meant. "Seungjun, you need to go back."

I instantly shook my head, I didn't want to go away from you. I wanted to stay here, by your side where I belonged. You let your tears fall as you put your palms on either side of my face and made me look at you, making sure I listened to what you said.

"It is not your time yet, Seungjun. I don't want you to come here this way. Go back, they need you. When your time comes I will be here, waiting for you. But that time is not now." I panicked as I watched you stand and start to back away, reaching my hand out to try and grab onto you so you wouldn't leave me again.

"Oh, and Seungjun? Forgive yourself, alright? It wasn't your fault and I know you love me. I love you too, so forgive yourself and remember the good times. Not the bad."

~I need you, come back to me so I can breathe again, I don't care if it hurts. I only need you, I need you. I need you U, U, U, U. I need you U, U, U, U. I need you U, U, U, U. I only need you, I need you~

That was the last I heard from you before I was enveloped in a bright light, I didn't know it was taking but I knew you wouldn't be there. Why couldn't I call out to you? Why couldn't I stay, like I wanted to?

"Seungjun! Seungjun, come on. Breathe!"

"Hyung!"

I gasped, water spilling from my mouth as I coughed and hacked before finally regaining my breath. I layed my head on the ground and looked around at the worried faces of the guys, my best friends and brothers. Youjin and Jihun helped me up before Inseong covered me with his jacket.

"I'm sorry," I croaked out as I was finally able to speak. "I just miss her so much."

The guys said nothing, instead huddling around me and comforting me like I was finally admitting I needed. I was glad to have them, glad they were here to help me. I looked out over the ocean through the heavy downpour of rain, remembering the last things I heard you say.

"Oh, and Seungjun? Forgive yourself, alright? It wasn't your fault and I know you love me. I love you too, so forgive yourself and remember the good times. Not the bad."

I will, I vowed silently to you over the water. I'll never forget, but I'll try to forgive. I love you.