
More of my stories on Wattpad: @LaVieFantasie and videos on TikTok: @laviefantasie
45 posts
Theyre Eternally My Roman Empire
they’re eternally my roman empire

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More Posts from Laviefantasie
This is as adorable as funny. Loved it!!!
I’ll protect you
Alive!Luke Patterson x Reader

Request by @dylanstilinskiposts: Hi there! Are your requests open? If so, would you be interested in one that’s Luke Patterson x reader, but also features reader platonically with the whole gang where they’re at a party and reader gets super drunk or something and basically everyone has to take care of her or thinks she’s hilarious?? Basically I’m a simp for protective Luke and the friendship between the whole gang 😂
A/N: Hahaha it’s 3 am😂 Let me know what you think please! I had fun with this and I wish I made it longer, but I don’t have any energy/ideas lmao😂 If you catch any mistakes, no you didn’t.
WC: 1.5K
MASTER
WARNINGS: Underage drinking
—
“Y/N, get off the table!” Luke’s head snapped around at the sound of Alex yelling over the music, followed by a mess of what he immediately recognized as your giggles. He cursed to himself as he stepped from Julie to find you, standing on top of the table with a drink in your hand and lip-synching to a song that was playing full blast. “Y/N!” Alex shouted again before he saw Luke making his way over rather quickly. “Thank god.” Alex mumbled and relaxed a little, knowing you would listen to Luke. Hopefully.
“Hey Y/N! How about we get you down from there?” Luke said carefully.
Keep reading
I have thought about coming back on tumblr so if you have any request of any character, message me! If I know the character I would like to write a one shot!!

ℒ𝒶 𝒱𝒾ℯ 𝒻𝒶𝓃𝓉𝒶𝓈𝒾ℯ ꨄ
Masterlist ✞
☆ Attack On Titan
Eren Jaeger/Yeager
☆ Jujutsu Kaisen
Gojo Satoru
☆ Julie and the Phantoms
Luke Patterson
Patience

Pairings: Eren Jaeger x Reader
Summary: It was just a childhood crush, right? If your heart skipped a beat every single time your eyes crossed or if your palms started to sweat with every lingering touch, it was just because of what you used to feel as a kid, right?
| Masterlist |
It was just a childhood crush. Nothing else. That’s what you’d heard all your life. And who could really blame you with how close you two had always been? No one. Truly, everyone around you both had expected one of you to grow a crush sooner or later.
You just wish it hadn’t been you. Everything would’ve been easier then. Cause nothing was worst than having a crush on THE Eren Jaeger.
If only he had never smiled your way maybe your heart would’ve been spared.
Tears started gathering in your eyes as you stared at your best friend dancing with another of your close friends. You couldn’t even find it in your heart to be mad. How could you when you knew how sweet and kind Historia was? You couldn’t blame Eren for choosing her, if there was ever really a choice to make.
You try to move your gaze away but all your strength was gone. It was as if your brain was unwilling to hide the truth from your heart, as if it had finally been enough.
A comforting arm settles itself across your shoulders and a body soon finds itself in front of you, shielding you from the heartbreaking scene.
“Don’t look, Y/N” you hear Armin say, he’s the one holding you safe under his arm.
“Let’s go home” says Mikasa, who’s shielding your view.
You can’t find your voice so you just nod weakly. Your best friends seem to understand though, and soon both are guiding you to the doors of your school gymnasium where the homecoming dance is being held.
Honestly, you knew this would happen someday. Eren had never shown any sign of reciprocating your feelings.
It still hurt though.
Armin and Mikasa keep quiet throughout the drive home, both allowing you to feel safe in their silence; neither asking you to voice how you’re feeling at the moment. You’re thankful for them, without them you’re not sure you’d even think about the possibility of mending your broken heart.
“You sure you don’t want us to stay with you tonight?”
You stare at them with a blank gaze, slowly shaking your head.
Mikasa and Armin share a look before nodding in understanding, promising to come check on you tomorrow. Waiting until you’re inside your home before even moving towards their car.
Only once you’re sure you’re safe inside your house and that they have left the driveway is that you allow yourself to crumble.
“Mom” you whimper “Mom! MOM!”
Your body is shaking and your voice is a dead giveaway that something is wrong, which makes your mother wake up alarmed and run downstairs.
The sight she is greeted with is one that breaks her heart in a way not even your father’s death could.
Your knees are wobbling and your whole body is trembling, it’s a miracle she reaches you in time before you fall down, gathering you safely in her arms as you allow yourself to break down for the first time that night.
“Shhh, sweetheart. It’s okay. Whatever happened it’s okay”
You sob, gut wrenching sobs that make your mother want to shed a few tears herself.
You spend the night in your mother’s arms, crying until sleep finally catches up to you. It’s your mother who greets Armin and Mikasa the next day, whispering how you need more time before you’re ready to see them. Both quietly explain the situation to your mom and she promises to let them know as soon as you’re ready to see them.
“Honey”
You hug your blanket tighter around your body.
“It’s gonna be okay, sweetheart” she tries again, hugging you from behind “It was just a crush, it’ll be okay”
“It wasn’t a crush” you choke “Mom, I—I love him. I love him, mom”
Her eyes widen without your knowledge and she curses herself for not seeing it sooner. Of course it wasn’t a crush, at least not anymore.
The way you’d always cling to him since you were kids, the way you’d follow him everywhere, how you always helped him study so that he’d never fall behind, how you were at each of his basketball games screaming at the top of your lungs.
It may have started as a crush but you both had grown up, your feelings had grown too.
She should’ve seen it. You wouldn’t spend a whole night baking his favorite cake for his birthday when you could buy it just for a crush. You wouldn’t leave everything behind just to answer his call just for a crush. You wouldn’t be the first to clean his wounds after another of his stupid fights just for a crush.
You had fallen in love with him. With every part of him. Even the ones he, or anyone around him, was not proud of.
“Oh, honey” she soothes “It’ll be okay. You may not believe me, but you’ll be okay”
She sighs, holding you tighter.
“You’ll fall in love again” she promises “And it’ll be just as great and as painful as this time. But you’ll fall in love again”
“I don’t want this to hurt, mommy” you sob “Why does it have to hurt?”
“Because every feeling that made you go up has to come down sooner or later. Sweetie, the greater the love, the greater the pain. That’s the rule” she sighs “But it’ll be okay. You’re strong, you’ll get through this. You’re just one heartbreak closer to happily ever after, just have a little patience”
The next day, although still hurting, you get out of bed and answer Armin and Mikasa’s texts, asking them to come for a movie night. You ignored Eren’s.
JaegerBomb: Y/N you left homecoming early?? What happened?
JaegerBomb: You probably fell asleep. Text me when you wake up, doofus, got a lot to tell you.
JaegerBomb: Morning, sleeping beauty!!
JaegerBomb: Hey, I’m getting a little worried. U okay?
JaegerBomb; Y/N what’s going on?? Answer your phone.
JaegerBomb: I’m gonna file a missing person’s report!!
You hesitated before locking your phone. You weren’t going to answer. You couldn’t. Not because you were mad at him, you had no reason to be mad. You weren’t answering because you needed to move on. You couldn’t be there every time he texted anymore.
You had to stop being his person, cause you weren’t his.
Armin and Mikasa came to your house as planned and it was honestly what you had needed all that time. Having their shoulders to cry on was enough to mend your broken heart, at least a little. They made you laugh and smile in a way you didn’t think possible to do with the pain you felt.
You sometimes forgot that your life didn’t revolve around Eren. Being so used to always being at his side, to always call him whenever you were upset or happy, you’d sometimes forget that Mikasa and Armin always stood beside you through the path. Never once abandoning you. It was nice to be reminded of how much you still have, with how much your heart felt was losing.
Eren, meanwhile, was confused and worried. Carla, his mom, watched with a curious gaze as he paced back and forth in front of her, trying to argue with her about going to the police cause it wasn’t normal that you weren’t answering him.
“Eren, honey, she could be busy”
“No, mom, she always answers!” He almost screams “This is not normal! What if something happened to her? Mom, we have to go!”
It was truly an interesting sight. Eren who had grown up to hide his feelings behind a blank space was openly expressing his worry. Somehow you were always the one to let her catch a glimpse of her old sweet boy.
Carla sighs, “Can I at least call Y/M/N first? Just before you jump to conclusions?”
Eren grunts but nods. Carla sighs once more before grabbing her phone, dialing your mother’s number. Eren waits anxiously by her side, making her worry he’d run to the door any second with how fidgety he was.
“Hello. Carla?”
“Y/M/N! Hi! How are you?”
“Mom” Eren whines in a whisper, urging her to get to the point.
“Sorry to call, I just wanted to—”
A crash sounds through the phone, making both Jaeger’s jump.
“Y/N! What are you guys doing?” They hear your mom scream.
“Sorry, mom! I got scared and my bowl fell!”
Eren visibly relaxes in his place once your voice sounds through the phone. Carla eyes him with curiosity. He had his hand over his chest as if the relief of you not being in trouble was finally allowing him to breathe.
“Sorry, Carla. Y/N is watching some scary movie with Mikasa and Armin” she laughs “You know them, can never leave them unsupervised”
Eren straightens in his seat. Mikasa and Armin? You were with them?
He stopped listening to the conversation after that. Why weren’t you answering him? Since when did you text them before you texted him? Didn’t you know he’d worry? Even better, why didn’t you invite him? Didn’t you want him there?
That couldn’t be it. You never left his side. You were even more annoying than Mikasa when you were kids, always glued to his side. Although not as protective as the dark haired beauty, your presence was always clinging to his. That hadn’t changed throughout the years. You clung to him every step of the way. Always making sure to be at his side no matter what. Even when your grades were good enough to take higher classes, you stuck by him. Never going too fast, never going too slow; you always stood by him.
And he never pushed you away, not like he did with Mikasa. He never could.
He tries texting you again, thinking that maybe the texts hadn’t gone through. But he knows better. He just doesn’t want to know better.
When the weekend ends, Eren, for the first time ever, gets to school in time. Honestly, he just wanted to be there when you got there, not wanting to miss you by chance.
“Eren!” He hears Historia before she sees her “How was your weekend? I haven’t heard from you since the dance?”
“Huh?” Historia hugs him, but he’s too distracted scanning the hallway for you.
“Thank you so much” she smiles “I had a lot of fun. I was really sad Ymir couldn’t make it, but you help it be a fun night”
“Yeah. No problem”
Historia frowns confused, “You okay?”
“Have you seen Y/N?”
Historia tilts her head, “Yeah, she was by Calculus with Jea—woah! Where are you going?”
He’s out of her sight before she can even finish her sentence. All he could think about was seeing you.
He just didn’t expect to see you with Jean.
He stopped midway. His heart tightens as he sees you laugh happily because of something Jean just said. His fist clenches when he sees the way Jean is smiling at you.
He didn’t like the way Jean was looking at you.
The bell rings and he moves fast, scared to lose you from his sight, as you walk to your class. Imagine his surprise when he goes in to find you sitting with Jean. He frozed for a second. Was he still dreaming? You always sat with him. Always had. What was going on?
“Y/N?”
You look up from your notebook to see Eren looking like kicked puppy in front of you. He looked lost. Which was weird. Never had you ever seen that expression on his face.
Jean, who’s at you side, frowns in bewilderment. He didn’t remember the last time Eren had shown so much emotion.
“Eren” you whisper before smiling faintly “H-hi, I didn’t see you come in”
“What are you doing?”
“What do you mean?”
Your teacher comes in before he can open his mouth again and he soon is obligated to sit behind you with Marco.
His jaw clenches. He didn’t understand. Had he done something wrong? Why were you not sitting with him? Why even though you smiled at him did he feel you so distant? Why did it hurt him so much to see you smiling and whispering with Jean when he knows he is your friend?
He didn’t really pay attention to anything their teacher said, too lost in his own thoughts to even bother caring.
The bell rings and he jumps off his seat, but before he can catch you someone grabs his arm.
“Mikasa” he moves his arm but she doesn’t let him go “Mikasa, let go”
“Leave her alone, Eren”
He looks at her with no expression, though the girl for a second could see how his eyebrow twitched.
“I need to talk to her”
“Her world doesn’t revolve around you” she scoffs “So don’t act like it does”
“What do you mean?”
“Weren’t you just about to go ask her why she didn’t sit with you?” She raises a brow “She doesn’t have to be at your side 24/7”
He hates that she knows him so well. Hates even more that she is right. You don’t owe him anything, you can sit with whoever you want. So why did he felt the need for one?
He jerks his arm off Mikasa’s grip and scoffs. Maybe you just wanted to talk to Jean, things would go back to normal soon enough.
At lunch you didn’t say by him either, you sat in between Sasha and Mikasa. Laughing loudly while sharing your lunch with Braus. He naively waited for you to hand him the chocolate chip cookie you always made for him, yet this time you didn’t.
And it went on for two months.
He couldn’t handle it anymore. 62 days of agony waiting for you to turn to look at him first, just to never do it. 62 days of waiting hours before you text him back. 62 days of seeing you sit with everyone but him. 62 days of wondering if you’ll show up or not at his game. 62 days of being invited to movie nights at your house by Mikasa or Armin, never by you.
He couldn’t bare it anymore and it didn’t take long for his friends to notice. Emotionless and unbothered Eren Jaeger jumping out of his seat every single time you entered the room. Eren Jaeger who cannot stop clenching his fist and moving his leg when you haven’t made an appearance. Eren Jaeger who looks like a lost child every single time you don’t give him his attention.
They honestly grew tired of it.
“You need to talk to him”
You blink, confused, at Armin, “what?”
“It’s been two months, Y/N, and he looks like a kicked puppy. You need to talk to him”
“What am I supposed to say?”
“Just let him know you’re still friends. That you’re not mad at him” he sighs “Things don’t have to go back to how they were, but he deserves to know he did nothing wrong. He can’t stop pouting and, honestly, I feel kinda sorry for him”
You sigh. Armin is right, as always. It wasn’t fair for Eren, who is your best friend, to feel like he has done something wrong when he truly hasn’t. You needed to make things right. You needed to salvage your friendship with him.
That’s why you come to school the next day with a box of the homemade chocolate cupcakes he loves so much.
That’s why you stand in front of your school’s doors waiting for him to arrive.
Your heart clenches with how defeated he looks once he does. And when your eyes find one another, you can physically see the hope and relief that he feels.
“Y/N” he sighs.
“Eren” you smile “I, uh… I wanted to apologize. I know I’ve been a little distant lately and—”
“Why?” He begs “Why have you been distant?”
You open and close your mouth, your finger tightening around the box in your hands. You had to be honest. You had to voice what you had silenced for so long. That way you would be able to move on, that way he’d understand why you needed to keep him at arm’s length.
“I, uh, um… I sa-saw you and His-Historia at the dance” you clear your throat “It wasn’t your fault! I swear I’m not mad and I never was! It’s just—it just hurt… that’s why I needed space. I liked you and it hurt”
You sigh, and extend the box towards him before slightly bowing your head.
“I’m sorry!”
You stay with your head down for a few seconds. He doesn’t move nor answers and it makes you wonder if he is mad you didn’t just tell him sooner, if he thinks you’re immature for not talking to him before so he could understand.
You feel the box being taken from your hands and before you can react you feel him lower his body, making you stand straight. Yet his face still falls on your shoulder. You feel his body relax as soon as it comes in contact with yours, and you feel him breathe in relief once he can feel your lavender scent. You don’t move, you don’t know exactly what to do in that moment. Does this mean he understands? Does it mean he is not mad? Are you both okay?
“I missed you” he whispers “I missed you so much”
“I—I missed you too, Eren”
“Never do that again” he begs softly “Please. Never leave me again”
“I, uh—I won’t”
“It’s you, Y/N” he continues “It’s always been you”
Your heart beats loudly in your chest at the declaration, yet confusion follows.
“But Histo—?”
“Historia was just sad Ymir couldn’t make it to the dance” he explains softly “I went to help her forget about it for a while”
“Oh”
“It’s you, Y/N. Always has been, always will be” he continues “Promise not to give up on me? Please. I just—please, don’t leave me”
You find yourself wrapping your arms around him, and he hides his face on your neck with content and relief.
“I promise”
The next time your friends see you both, you’re no longer clinging to him. Instead, Eren has his arm around your shoulders, holding you close to him. And, for the first time in a long time, he is smiling. That boyish smile they had all missed.
Your mom had been right. It was just one heartbreak before your happily ever after. She just didn’t know it would be the same person who’d mend it.
You just had to have a little patience.
You’re Losing Me

Pairings: Eren Jaeger x Reader
Summary: Is love truly enough? Enough to stick around even when you feel yourself slowly dying from it? Can it truly ever be enough?
| Masterlist |
She couldn’t breathe. She could feel her lungs pushing against her ribcage while looking for the oxygen they begged to inhale. Her heart throbbed against them, looking for any sign —no matter if it was painful— to remind itself that it still lived. That it could still beat.
She didn’t think she could blame her heart for the need to make sure it could still beat, not after the words she had just uttered to the reason it had been beating so harmoniously for so long.
“We’re done”
She didn’t even know she had said it until she saw his eyes widen in disbelief. She didn’t even know she’d ever truly have the courage to say it out loud.
But she had. It was done.
“What—why? Y/N, baby, what’s—I don’t understand”
Hurt. That’s all she could see on those blue-green eyes she had always found comfort in. Those who had always looked at her with so much love it had been unbelievable. Those eyes who lately hadn’t shined in her direction even once.
She could hear her pulse all throughout her body. She could hear it as loudly as if her heart had been pressed against her ears.
Could she truly say it again? Could she be brave—strong enough to utter those painful words one more time? Did she really have to?
“We’re… we’re done, Eren” she weakly whispers.
It pained her, of course. It truly felt as if she was forced to talk after swallowing glass, her throat and mouth filled with blood that stopped her from formulating the words as loud as she should’ve.
Eren shook his head in disbelief. Everything in his body felt numb. It felt as if someone had thrown a cold bucket of water at him and left him outside during winter with not even a jacket to give him a sense of warmth. This couldn’t be happening. He didn’t understand why it was happening.
“I don’t understand” he whispers weakly “I don’t… Y/N, please…”
“The fact th-that you don’t understand” she sobs weakly, the tears she had fought so hard to contain flowing freely down her cheeks, “Is even mor-more reason why we must bre-break up”
“Did I do something?” He asks, tears accumulating in his eyes “What did I do? I ca-will fix it”
She wanted him to stop. She didn’t want to hear him.
All this time she had been wanting him to fix what he had broken. All this time she had been waiting for him to realize that he was hurting her. That loving him was killing her. All this time she wanted him to give her one reason to stay.
And all this time he hadn’t.
“You can’t fix it”
Her voice once soft and weak became hard and pained. All the hurt she had to endure this last year coming back full force, giving her the strength she needed to save herself from self destructing. The strength she needed to not give in.
“It’s too late to fix it” she finalizes “I’ve been waiting all this year for you to fix it. I’m done waiting”
“Y/N—”
“Do you know how hard it was to watch you push everyone, including me, away?” She sobs “How hard it was to watch you shamelessly flirt with every girl that looked your way while I was right there at your side waiting for you to notice me? How hard it was to see you shrug off our relationship, our friendship, as if it was nothing?”
Eren’s eyes widen even more, if possible. Had he truly been doing that? He knew he had change, he knew he had closed off on his friends after his parents passing, but they had never once left his side. She had never left his side. No matter how hard he pushed. Or how cruel he was.
And then last year he had gotten his shit together. She had helped him with that. He had pushed all his pain onto something productive and had become the university’s star quarterback.
Is that when it all started? When his dull grief-striking eyes and neutral face had become the bad boy mysterious persona every girl wanted to date and every boy wanted to be. Was it then when he decided to play along to all of it just to not feel alone, to feel worthy, forgetting what he truly had always had by his side?
Had it really come to this? Had he really taken for granted what he had by believing he always would have it?
“We—I would’ve stayed with you through anything” she continues “I stayed through everything. No matter how bad it was. But… I’m out of reasons to stay”
“I love you”
Three words. Three words he had never once uttered in that year. Three words she had remembered herself those 365 days to keep fighting.
Those three words had already lost its meaning.
“Loving isn’t enough anymore”
And she turned around going for the door. He scrambled out of the bed he had been sitting while looking up at her as fast as he could.
She couldn’t leave. If she left it became real. If she left he wouldn’t be able to fix what he had broken.
Had he really broken the best thing that had happened to him? The one thing in his life that still gave him hope?
He tried to grasp her hand, to stop her from leaving, but she had already opened the door and crossed it. His hand met the wooden frame as her body started making her way through the hallway, away from his dorm.
How had it come to this?
It had been a year after Eren’s parents death through a tragic car accident. A year since Zeke, Eren’s older half-brother, had taken his custody. It had been a hard year. Eren’s eyes had lost its incomparable spark and his smile had ceased to exist.
Mikasa, Armin and Y/N, his closets friends since childhood, along with the rest of their gang had done everything they could to help him. Even when he snapped at them, spitting cruel words that fed into their insecurities, they never left his side. He pushed and pushed with all his might, anything to keep them away in fear of ever feeling the tightness in his chest of losing someone he loved again. But they pushed back. All of them. Never once giving in.
They knew he was hurting. They knew it. And they would never leave his side while he did so.
So they stuck around no matter how hurt they got along the way. Because it was Eren, and Eren deserved to have people fight for him as hard as he used to fight for them.
Y/N became the best fighter among them.
She would take his cruel malicious words with grace before embracing him against her warmth, letting him let out all his anger and sadness on her. Promising to carry it on her shoulders in hopes of lifting some from his, as small as the portion was.
And day by day, night by night, she stood tall by his side. Never once letting him fall.
He was thankful, even when he didn’t voice it. She had giving him something constant, something he could hold onto when the waves that came crashing towards him in hopes of drowning him got to him. She kept her hold steady and unfaltering, keeping him afloat.
So, when had he started taking it for granted?
“Eren Jaeger, isn’t it?”
He had been waiting outside the Economics classroom for Y/N’s class to finish so they could go have lunch when the captain of the cheerleading squad Historia was a part of first spoke to him.
It wasn’t that people didn’t know him around university, they did with him being the quarterback, he just wasn’t someone that you would think was easy to approach. So people normally didn’t. Not that he minded, he had all he needed with his friends and you by his side.
He nods, coldly.
But she smiled. As brightly as possible, her hazel eyes shining under the hallway’s lights.
“Last week’s game was amazing! You were so fast, it seemed nobody could ever come close to catching you” she giggled.
His cold demeanor melted slightly, not used to compliments from other than his coach and friends. Most people just clapped him on the back as a way to congratulate him, too afraid to say something to him.
He nods again in thanks.
“We, the cheer girls and the team’s boys, were thinking of holding a small get-together to celebrate the win” she continues “We’d like you to come. We know you don’t like those sceneries, as you’ve made clear before, but Connie and Jean are going. Reiner and Bertolt too”
He stays quiet.
“Just wanted to formally invite you. Hopefully the rest of your teammates going, the ones you’re actually close with, persuades you”
Before Eren can refuse, the bell rings and the door he was standing beside bursts open. Students cross it without even batting an eye.
Eren’s eyes soften once he catches a glance of you and the bright sincere smile you send his way when you see him. All under the cheerleading’s watchful curious gaze.
“Ren” you kissed his cheek before looking at the girl he was talking to, “Chloe! Hi! I haven’t seen you in a while, still battling with Calculus?”
The blonde girl, Chloe, groans, “Ugh, Mr. Ackerman is still the worst”
Both girls share a laugh under Eren’s curious gaze. Did they known each other? For the laugh you just shared and the familiarity in which you talked with one another he guessed you did. How? He guessed that through a class since he hadn’t ever seen you hang out with other girls that weren’t Mikasa, Sasha, Historia or Ymir.
“You know each other?”
His voice is cold and dull, but his gaze on you is soft. So soft that Chloe isn’t sure she imagined it. She didn’t know he could have a gaze as soft as that with the cold lifeless way he glared at everything around him.
And yet, Y/N smiled as if he had just told her she was the most beautiful girl to ever exist.
“We do! We met during Ackerman’s Calculus class last semester”
“This little genius became our teacher’s favorite while I am stuck with him once more” the blonde beauty groaned.
“You’ll get it this time. I can help you”
That’s something he had always loved about you. The selfless way you tried to help everyone in every little way you could.
“You’re an angel, Y/N” she smiles “How do you two know each other?”
Y/N’s smile brightened if possible, “This is my adorable boyfriend that I’ve told you about”
Chloe’s eyes widen in disbelief, “Eren Jaeger is the all-loving charismatic too-good-to-be-true childhood best friend told lover you’ve told me about?”
You laughed before nodding making Chloe’s eyes widen even more.
For Y/N, Chloe’s face was funny and innocent. Eren, on the other hand, understood the gleam of uncertainty in the blonde’s eyes. It was obvious she was trying to comprehend how the perfect boyfriend you had describe was the university’s feared lifeless bad boy.
It made him angry to feel as if he wasn’t worthy of you, he already thought so himself so seeing someone else think that made his blood boil.
He wanted to prove to everyone and to himself that he was worth it, that he could be worthy of you. So he did the one thing that condemned you both without even knowing it.
“When’s the party?”
The party had been eventful and unexpected. None of their friends had expected Eren and neither had they expected the way he had behaved that night. He had drank and talked, and even though he hadn’t laughed or smiled he had become this unapproachable guy that now everyone wanted to approach.
His aura was intoxicating. And like a moth to the flame, everyone would fly towards him as if he was holding the matches.
Mikasa, Armin and Y/N had watch with uncertainty the amount of attention Eren was receiving. But moreover, the way he seemed to be bathing in it. It was a weird sight. Eren had never been one to want attention, he always got it without looking for it though. But he had never seek it.
So why was he seeking and bathing in it now?
“Well…” started Armin “At least he seems okay”
Y/N nodded a little uncertain, but Mikasa frowned.
“I don’t like this” she muttered “Feels like the start of a disaster”
“Don’t frown, Mika” Y/N said lovingly, “Maybe this is what he needs to open up more. He’s been getting better, so maybe… maybe this is his way of trying to go back to who he is”
“I don’t know”
“We have to trust him” Armin added, “It’s not like he’s doing anything bad anyway, he’s just making friends”
Mikasa’s frown deepened but she let herself be guided out of the living room towards the kitchen by her two closest friends. She had a bad feeling about all of this, she just hoped she was wrong.
But they had all come to know a long time ago that Mikasa’s instincts were never wrong. Especially concerning Eren.
The first time they realize that something was wrong was during their monthly movie night between the Scouts, as they like to call themselves since their camp days where all they met and became friends. It was that night that Eren first truly disappointed them.
[ Can’t make it. Party at Floch’s. Srry ]
That’s all his text to the group chat had said. Not only had he totally blown them off on their tradition, but he hadn’t even bother to invite them. It was maddening. Especially since Connie and Jean were also invited to said party and refused to go because of their plans.
It weirded them all out. If they had invited Reiner and Bertolt and they cancelled they could’ve understood, they were close but not that close.
It had always been Armin, Mikasa, Eren and Y/N until camp. And then it had become Armin, Mikasa, Eren, Y/N, Jean, Connie, and Sasha. More had been added along the way, but the seven of them were as tight as possible. Nothing could ever come in their way, so why did it suddenly feel like something could?
They spent their movie night in an uncomfortable silence. Not even Jean, who always took every opportunity he could to insult Eren, said something.
And then one movie night missed became two and three until they just stopped expecting him to come.
At university, Eren barely found them to spend time with them during his breaks or lunch as they were used to. Instead they were forced to look for him all throughout the campus, always finding him surrounded by other team members or cheerleaders.
And even then, Armin and Y/N tried to convince themselves this was just him trying to become socially available once again. No matter how many times Mikasa told them she didn’t believe that was the case.
Their disappointment reach its breaking point when Armin received an ‘SOS’ text from Mikasa asking him to go to their dorm, only to find a dolled up sobbing Y/N on the dark-haired beauty’s embrace. Eren had missed their anniversary date to hang out with Floch. Y/N could’ve probably let it slide if it hadn’t been for the any times he had already cancelled —and stood her up— before.
That was the last straw for Armin.
He had seen you, Y/N, his childhood best friend give your all to the blue-green-eyed boy. Since the moment you both had met Eren and Mikasa, you had always given all you could give to Eren. Especially the last couple of years when he had started to become unstable. You had never given in. Never had you left him alone, no matter how many reason you’d had.
So what gave him the right to make you cry?
Armin never again excused his behavior after that night. Him and Mikasa always standing beside you as you had to endure the attention from girls Eren was receiving, especially when he seemed to enjoy it so much. More than once had they offered to give him a peace of their minds, begged you really, but you had refused. You didn’t know what was going on through his head but you had faith in him. Faith that he would figure it out and fix it, as he had always done before.
You had waited for the whole year.
Your last straw came on your birthday. Just a month after Christmas, which Eren failed to celebrate with the Scouts again in their traditional small gathering on the 25th.
Your friends had all prepared you a surprise party, which they had planned through a secret group chat in which Eren had failed to text back every time. The party was set to start at 10 o’clock at night at Armin’s house, giving you enough time to spend the morning as you always did with your family and the rest of the day with Eren, as they all had been used to since you two started dating exactly five years ago when both of you were fifteen. It was perfect, honestly, you’d be too distracted with the brunette boy to find suspicious why they all had been MIA.
Except Eren didn’t show up at your doorstep. He hadn’t even called or texted.
Which meant you spent the rest of the day before the party locked in your room crying silently while you wondered why.
Only to find out through Floch’s instagram story he was at his house, with an unknown girl under his arm.
By the time Mikasa had gone to pick you up at your childhood home, you were asleep on your bed with swollen eyes and dry tear and mascara stains on your cheeks. She had gasped at the sight, not understanding what had happened. At least until she saw what was on the phone —which was still unblocked— you held softly in your grasp.
And the dark-haired beauty saw red.
She had texted Armin and soon the party had moved to your living room, and instead of a party they turned it into a movie night. They decorated the place and made a blanket fort, Annie even going as far as going to buy some fairy lights to put all over the place.
By the time Sasha went to wake you up and helped you get ready, all of them hid awaiting your arrival.
It had helped heal your broken heart a little.
Still you couldn’t ignore what had been going on for long enough anymore. You had finally ran out of excuses.
So the next week when Armin went to the dorm you and Mikasa shared, you knew. And they knew you knew. So they held you, all day and night, trying to give you the strength you’d need to do what was right for you.
And you did.
And that’s how you’d both gotten to this stage of your story. As painful as getting there had been.
Eren fell to the floor. His knees had given out. He had been frozen on his spot, watching the door intently as if that would somehow make you come back. He thought he had been doing the right thing, he thought he had finally start becoming someone worthy of you. Someone that deserved to be loved by someone as good as you.
He was sobbing. He didn’t even know when he had started, but his body shook with the force of each sob.
He didn’t know what to do. How could he keep going without your unwavering presence beside him giving him the strength he needed to fight back against the cruel world they lived in?
That’s how Armin found him when he came back from his classes. Hugging his knees to his chest on the floor as he sobbed his heart out.
“So she actually did it, huh?”
His teary gaze found his best friend’s stone cold one.
“I d-don’t… Ar-Armin, I don-don’t unders-understand”
“You don’t understand?” He scoffed, “You missed every single movie night we’ve had for a year. You’ve missed every date you guys planned. You missed your anniversary, Christmas, the New Year. And you don’t understand?”
Eren stares, dumbfounded. Had he truly missed all that? He couldn’t even remember properly at this moment.
“You even missed her birthday” Armin continued, “It was last Friday, FYI”
Another sob wrecks through his body. Your birthday, he had missed your birthday. He didn’t even remember the last time he had ever missed one and now he had completely forgotten about it.
What was wrong with him?
“I truly don’t know what was going through your head all this year. Nor why you did every single thing you did” Armin sighed “I’m just glad she finally had the courage to walk away. You were killing her. Everytime you flirted with another girl, every time you blew her off, you were killing her. I’m glad she finally walked away”
Eren had no idea something could hurt this much after his parents’ passing. But it truly hurt more to know he had lost the person he loved the most when she still was at arm’s length.
Especially when this time there was nothing nor no one else to blame but himself. He had pushed you too far this time and you weren’t coming back.
He had lost you.