Helpless

Helpless

Description: She worked as a lawyer in New York until she received a phone call from the man she owes her career to. She knew she would be back and what she was in for but what she didn’t know is that her life would change even more than she imagined.

Part 2

Chapter 1

“You hide your emotions for a living but at this moment you are not doing a great job” I directed an eyeroll to him. We were currently sitting at the dinner table, waiting for his children to join us.

“Not really helping John '' I let out a sigh taking in his words. I know he was right. This family has been in my life since I was 17. I had met Beth, who at first wasn’t the kindest but somehow we both got along great. In my job you had to be assertive, judgemental,firm, confident and when things got rough, you had to be rude and tough. Not an easy thing to do on a normal basis and I thought to myself I was crazy for not only entering law but to becoming a General Practice Attorney. Somehow when I enter the courtroom or when I am making a deal my eyes dial in to my target and I blackout. I do what is needed to do and my streak of losing none of my cases shows that. But when I am outside the law and I am just me, I lose myself. With Beth, she was that for me. She was the assertive side in me and I was the calming side to her. We got each other and I was thankful for that.

“You didn’t tell me she was joining '' Jamie, sweet Jamie. I get up and give him a hug which he gladly takes. Right out of law school I was taken under his wing. John decided not to tell him how he helped me through law school and how he became a mentor to me since the night we met. Jamie took such pride in seeing me become what I wish he knew I could be. Soon I had to move on since I wasn't a specialist in only one thing. I now only see him if he or John needs help and needs me to work with him on something. We distance ourselves over the past years but nothing feels any different now. “Finally” He sighs, moving around the table to take a seat across from me, of course one seat down from John who was at the end of the table.

“Decided we couldn’t keep her a secret anymore and now would be a great time to have her here” After Lee’s death I was asked to come back to the ranch. I moved to New York as I was working on expanding my knowledge in more than just Law, but when I received John's call I dropped everything. Lee’s death was unfortunate and John mentioned in that phone call that things were just going to get tougher from then, and hell did it. I have been working in the background with Lee’s death and filing it under the table with the help of Jamie. Also helping him with Kayce and Monica. When the drug explosion accident happened and Monica’s accident at school. With the kidnapping of the girl Kayce found and the trips he took to jail. Not to mention Dan and Beth, and I have a feeling that won’t be it.

“He didn’t want to continue hearing my rants on driving from home all the way to town. Loved the peaceful rides but you know I am not a morning person” I was staying just outside of Darby. Of course I could stay in town but it wasn’t a risk John nor I wanted to take. He has enemies and everybody knows each other, we didn’t want to give them anything that could come back and damage the farm.

“That you are not” I looked up hearing a familiar voice. “You remember your finals week?” I shake my head in embarrassment. I had just turned 20 but in Beth’s head I was 21. So she made a trip from Salt Lake City to Connecticut. Of course I told her right but she didn’t care. She told me Yale could wait for a couple hours so I could have fun. I was unaware that her couple hours meant a whole night a day. John sent me to study in Yale a couple months after we met. I promised him I wouldn’t disappoint and for me, I never make promises so It was like writing it in stone. I took multiple classes and spent nights, days,summer,spring break, holidays studying and advancing as much as possible in my degree. Work paid off when in only four years I graduated when it usually took 7. Anyways I was in my finals and she took me out that morning.

“In my defense it was 3 in the morning when you showed up” yeah 3 in the morning, I was walking into my apartment hoping to take a 3 hour nap so I could continue at 6 the next day.

“That when New york wakes up” So she shook me off the bed and drove us down an hour and 30 minutes to Manhattan.

“I thankfully took a that ride a power nap”

“If that is what you want to call it.” She laughs while pouring herself a drink. “ I could swear her body felt more energized than ever because she looked like a zombie who hadn’t slept in years'' I hadn’t slept well in 5 weeks. I knew finals were coming and with everything going on I needed every hour I could get to prepare for it. “We got to the club and she was going on a mission. I am not going to tell you what she did to get in because it would ruin your image of her '' She meant I seduced and promised the security an amazing morning if he let me in knowing I wasn’t 21 yet. That might not seem bad but when your promises are very verglaur and detailed and also loud, well now that I think about it, it was more embarrassing but still. “But don’t worry I didn’t let her slip that night. Well maybe just a little.” I cover my eyes and my ears. Dancing on every surface I could find and wired with more alcohol than they had in the club I was having the best time of my life that night. But when we got out and I saw the sun I began cursing at it like it killed and took away everything I loved. I bet there is a video of me out there becoming New York’s crazy woman who hates the sun. After that I went back into the club and refused to come out until the sun was gone. And to be fair that was not what I meant by not being a morning person. I love sunrises and sunsets, I just hate waking up.

“Sorry I am late. Leaving Tate wasn’t easy today” I have only seen Kayce from afar. When I arrived at the farm, Kayce had already had the altercation with John. I soon left and didn’t hear about him until I came back. I have been only helping Jamie with his cases but never had the opportunity to speak to him once. I knew he had moved back and became the Ranch Foreman but I avoided the farm as much as possible knowing that was what John and I agreed on. Kayce walked in with his head down seating next to John and Jamie. He only focused on me when John spoke up.

“Don’t worry son. We were just catching up” he stood up at the end of the table looking over at us. “This is Y/N. She will be living here starting today” That is not what we spoke about. I gave him a worried look but he only shook his head. That meant I had to trust him. “Beth and Jamie have known of her for the past years but because of the circumstances of you not being present in the ranch” A little sadness in both their eyes could be seen. “You hadn’t gotten a chance to meet her” I sent him a nod with a gentle smile and his response was a cold stare that he quickly moved towards his father.

“What do you mean she will be living in the main house?” Not that I mattered more than him but somehow his words caused annoyance in me. You don’t even know me and speak like I was not important. John takes the chance to sit down as Gator comes out with the food.

“I want to take this dinner as a chance to not only tell you about her” he look over to Kayce and then followed his gaze to Jamie and Beth as he continued speaking “and to tell you two along with Kayce how she came to the ranch and why I asked her to come back and stay in the ranch” That last part he looked over at me and I knew he was asking me to listen and consider his question on staying and living in the ranch for awhile. We began eating but John didn’t touch his food as he began speaking. “One night almost 7 years ago she came to the farm. I know under what circumstance she came to run into our lands but that is up to her if she wants to share it with you” He looks over at me and I give him a nod thanking him for that. He looks back to his kids and continues. “That night 3 of our cowboys were out and found her. Thankfully Rip found her before anything bad happened to her.” I look down focusing on my food not really wanting to relive that moment. I guess it showed on my face since I felt Beth take my hand that was settled in my lap. “Rip brought her to me and that night I decided to bring her in. She made a good impression on Rip and I so I decided to help her from that day on.” I smile hearing that from John. Rip was a big softy but had a hard time showing that to people. Mainly because this kind of life didn’t bring out the best in him. He liked it and as much as I would like him to see the better side of things, I know he is better off that way he is.

“So what does that mean? Is she?-” Beth chuckles at Kayces words.

“She is younger than you Kayce! Just 22” Almost 23 I thought. Jamie's words cause a groan from his brother who looks over to John for answers.

“It means I saw something and helped her become what she wanted in life. She spoke to me about going into law school and to show her gratitude she promised to do everything in her power to make me proud and devote herself to this family and she hasn’t failed since”

“She has helped me keep this family running and keeps you from jail.” Jamie says, taking a bit of his potato.

“She had been working behind the scenes since I asked her to come back months ago.” John adds finally starting to eat his dinner.

“So you paid for her school and are now moving her into the house in exchange for her service?” It was a question but to him it was a statement that he made his own answer from. “It will become a great headline” I see the annoyance now in John's face.

“I can assure you that being here will cause no harm in the farm's image. I will assure myself of that personally.” Beth chuckles again but Kayce takes it the wrong way. Getting up and excusing himself from the table.

“You don’t have too, it's not something he has a say about” John grabbed my arm before I could walk past him.

“If I am going to devote myself to this family like I promised I need him to trust me.” John nods letting go of me as I try to catch up to Kayce. I see a dark shadow walking down the path towards the foreman’s cabin. “Kayce!” I don’t see him turn around but he does turn right and leans over the fence. Goddamn dramatic Duttons. I shake my head with a mission, yet I don’t know what I am going to say when I reach him.

“I’ll ask the questions and I’ll tell you if you deserve to be here” I only gently smile and give him a nod. It took everything in me not to roll my eyes at him. He spoke those words and it brought annoyance to his character. “What was the real reason behind him paying and allowing you to be here?” I shrugged in all honesty John and I never spoke about why he decided to help me out. I want to say it was for the kindness in his heart. We all know he takes prisoners and gives them work, it doesn’t sound like much but I can assure you it's a lot. Then there is Rip, a small boy who needed something and John gave him a start, a chance.

“I have no idea” I leaned against the fence, directing my gaze to the land before us. It was past 6 and the sun was way down. The crickets are already playing their tunes and the wind, singing along. “I am not one to usually put my take in things but I think it was because of you” I didn’t turn but I felt his gaze turn sharply to me. To be honest I was feeling a little nervous. Beth, Jamie and Lee had asked me the same question but I never told them what I actually thought the reason behind it was, one because I wasn’t sure and two because I was no one to put such an idea out there. “I came in around the time you left” Under his stare it felt like I was starting to run a fever. Chills went down my spine and I felt like I was burning, thankfully he turned back to the view in front of him. “I always was one to read people’s sadness and when I looked into his eyes, that was all I could see. At that moment I didn’t know why he was sad until later on when I met Beth. She told me all about it. The couple of weeks I spent in the ranch John was kind to me. Taking me in and treating me not like a worker but-” I cut myself off. It caused a bit of pain even thinking of such feelings. How for John I may be like his own child but I know that wasn’t true. Sure he cared for me but if it was between his own blood and me well, there was no question about it. I was pulling on my own heart strings and I needed to cut myself off. “I feel like I was just a right time, right place situation that helped him feel better about letting you go”

“How did you end up here?” He was avoiding my statement. The answer to that was something I haven’t told anyone except John. John had the right to know, but that wasn’t the case with Kayce or his siblings. I needed time. “By the looks of it I see you fighting yourself on whether you should tell me or not” I quickly shake my head.

“It's not a difficult choice. I have the right to not talk about it. Just like I told Beth, John had the right to know but it doesn’t mean it was easy. Am still dealing with my past and soon when everything is over, there will be no need to keep it hidden. Until then I ask them to trust me just like I trust the Dutton blindly”

“You ask for trust but we have more to lose with how much trust we put with you” He was right

“It might not be a lot but I could lose everything with putting my trust in you all. The Duttons are a full package and I choose to take that on no matter what. What you know of this family and its past since I have been here I have helped, if anything happens that could come back and bite me too. You know better than me that people here come and go just as fast as bullet trains”

A/N: I have found my new obsession.♥️. I don’t know where am going with this but I hope you guys like it. This app doesn’t have much of him so I hope that changes.

Thank you❤️.

NOT A CHAPTER

This will be insert of storylines that happens in the future if Yn and Kayce

Chapter 13

Chapter 12:

I was walking up the stairs from a long night at the office. “Yes Jennifer, don’t worry about it just enjoy your weekend” I was in another divorcee case but the soon to be ex wife I was representing wanted more and more. Everytime we finished an agreement she wanted another meeting set up the next day. “Yes, don’t worry about it, I will be the one calling her tomorrow” She was currently blowing up Jennifer’s phone because we told her we wouldn’t be able to set up a meeting until next thursday and that is an inconvice for her. I soon finish my phone call and walk into the house.

“Seems like you need a drink” I place my things on the island as I shake my head.

“The only thing I need is a vacation or maybe a radar that would tell me when I am accepting a crazy person as a client” I knock off my heels and fall onto the couch. My eyes opened as soon as I felt someone overlooking me. “Liquor isn’t good for me” I say, taking the drink from Beth’s hand.

“Don’t I know it?” She laughed, moving my feet so she could sit. She normally drinks at any hour but this time her expression told me it had a deeper meaning

“What's going on with you?” I sat up a bit, turning over to her.

“What?” I raise my eyebrow, turning my whole body in her direction. “Okay” She set her drink down, turning towards me now. “John found out about you and Kayce and the words he used weren’t exactly accepting” Great. I let a sigh slip, as I fell onto the couch again. We have been seeing each other for almost 2 months now. We didn’t keep it a secret exactly but we weren’t screaming to the world. We barely see eachother with getting up before the sun and spending late hours at work. We have had a total of 3 dates and one of them was interrupted by his work. He hasn’t even asked me to be his girlfriend! “Don’t freak” She says, pushing the drink towards my face finishing it in one go.

“What did he say?” I sit up, placing the glass down. She stands up grabbing the said glass and pouring more liquor in. “Beth,” I stood up, taking the drink from her and finishing it. I sure will need it.

“He said something along the lines of, He doesn’t need any distraction” Distraction?

“What else?” I pour more than a shot in the glass walking back to the couch.

“y/n” She warned as I took a sip.

“You know what!” I turn towards her. “It doesn’t even matter” I finish the drink and set it on the side table. “He doesn’t have to worry about me, I never want to be somewhere where I am a bother to someone” I start walking up the stairs and hear Beth’s footsteps behind me.

“What are you doing? I will talk to him! He didn’t-He is just stressed” I turned over to her.

“You don’t need to talk to him about anything, I will.” I go right into my room and pull out my suitcase. “I never took anything for free. Never. I am grateful for the help he gave me but am not going to be a chess piece he can move when he likes” I never carried a lot of belongings so it didn’t take long for me to finish.

“Y/N. You can’t just leave”

“My parents thought the same” I look at her plainly in her eyes. “You will see the checks he paid me weren't cashed. Money will be wired for tuition with interest.” I put on a coat and grab hold of my suitcase. “I will call you tomorrow” I leave her standing in the middle of the room to walk downstairs. My nerves were a wreck right now. My mind was telling me there was a better way to go about this but my heart was taking over me. I got out the door and onto my car. I turn on the car and place it on reverse before I hear my phone ring. “Hello?” I glimpse at the caller ID. I didn’t want him to worry so I calmed my voice hoping to get him off the phone as soon as possible.

“Y/N. Beth told me what happened” Fuck you Beth. “I am almost home. Just wait 5 more minutes”

“I can’t Kayce.” I want to do nothing more than not to see him. I back up then change gear to drive off the ranch.

“We can talk about it. Baby don’t leave” I pressed the end button before reliezing it. My eyes were getting blurry and my hands were shaking. I didn’t know if it was because of the coldness or because I was holding back freaking out. Minutes went by and I had to stop the car to the side, it wasn’t smart driving like this. I saw my breath in the air. I move to the passenger side and lean against my car. I look up to the night sky feeling no tears coming out.

“Am so stupid” I hit my forehead sliding down to the ground. I had my own money and could go anywhere. I have a good background and could be accepted anywhere. I’ve dreamt of living beside a body of water and I could do that. I had no attachment here, so why is it hard to get back in my car? Was I even going to go through with it?. The Duttons were the only family I really felt needed and loved by. I hated to hear John wasn’t happy with me. Was it a stretch to think I meant something to him more than what it was? I was only a girl he helped years ago go through college so I could be of use to him later on. Or was I thinking too hard?

“Y/N?” I turned to my left and I didn’t even notice the headlight shining towards me.

“I have to go” I stood up walking to the driver side door. I felt a tug on my arm pulling me back.

“If you wanted to go you would have '' He took hold of my face forcing me to look up at him. “Look at me. Am here” Even if my face was right infront of him my eyes were elsewhere. “Look at me damnit'' He tugged my jaw to get my attention. My eyes filled to the brim with tears but I dared not to blink. “Am here” He nods and my head unconsciously follows along

“I know,” I whisper, moving my hands up to grab onto his jacket. “I don’t know what happened” His hands move to hold my cheeks. The cold wind was non existent by then. “I hate feeling like a bother. He has done so much and-” I couldn’t hold it. I burst out crying and cling onto him harder. His arms wrap around me pulling me in closer.

“Doesn’t make what he said right. He loves you like a family, don't ever forget that. He just gets hot tempered with things and can’t think straight” He pulls away allowing me to look up to him. “You have done nothing wrong. You have done everything he has asked for, you do not belong to him” He lays a gentle kiss on my lips. “Don’t feel like you owe him something, okay?” I nod. A smile appeared on my face. Some weight has lifted off my shoulders. I still need to talk to John. If he wants me out of the house and fires me as an attorney I will find somewhere to live and get another job. I feel deep down that is what I really need right now. Maybe a break from all the Duttons is best. “Can I take you home?” Maybe not all the Duttons.

“Not tonight. Can we go somewhere else?” he lays another kiss, nodding his head. I grab his hand before he starts walking away. “It's best if you drive, I had a couple of drinks tonight”

“Let me call Rip” I nod, getting into the passenger seat and looking at the rearview mirror. Watching as he gets his things from his truck and walks over to get into the car. “Yeah. Tell her she’s okay” My eyes widen a bit feeling bad about worrying Beth. “Can’t do nothing with her. She’s a stubborn one” He chuckles a bit earning a hit on the arm. “And abusive” He grabs my arm before it makes contact with him again. “She has to put up with so much more, I can handle this” I shake my head leaning back waiting for the phone call to finish. “Where to?” He turns on the car and turns over to me.

“Keep going straight, I’ll give you directions from here. '' He switches gears but does not let go of the break yet. I look over and see him offering his hand. Without a word I enterwine our fingers as they lay gently on the console. “Am okay” I whisper while looking over. “I just want you, okay?” I lean closer.

“Yes ma’am” He smiles, letting go of the break.

HELPLESS

Description: She worked as a lawyer in New York until she received a phone call from the man she owes her career to. She knew she would be back and what she was in for but what she didn’t know is that her life would change even more than she imagined.

Part 7

Chapter 6:

I avoided doing anything else than what was already on my plate. I didn’t stop by to check on Jamie on his first day. I didn’t try to instigate anything to do with what happened with Tate. The only things I tried focusing on was the trail back home. “How are you doing?”

“Okay. My lawyer pulled a restraining order on him and all of his immediate family” I have been keeping in contact with my cousin. It took her two years to admit she was the one in those rumors. I knew of it back then but it was up to her to tell everyone not me. I didn’t get angry or upset that she didn’t defend me when she heard I left or say something when people were bashing my family for the kind of daughter they raised. I was waiting for more but she didn’t continue.

“What happened?” I heard a slight cry on the other side of the phone. “Sofie what happened?” She had filed a restraining order against the guy two years ago and I didn’t find out until a couple months ago that she dismissed it 4 months later and were still talking. The case continued and when he found out she wouldn’t stop he got aggressive. Didn’t know about that either.

“My lawyer advised me to take the deal. They said if he is put on the list of offenders his lawyer could place me with child endangerment” At the time of the accident she was with a younger family memeber. No evidence was proved to have affected the young child but anything can randomly appear and touch the jurys heart. “The deal agree on the restraining order being removed, the payment of his lawyer fees along with emotional damage” That mother-fucker. “I don’t want to let this go” She whispered. “Please” I knew what she was asking but I only shaked my head, closing my eyes. I can’t. “I know you don’t want to get involved but I need you here, like old times” I can’t, I can’t go back. “Y/N?” I put my attention back on the phone call. “I know I don’t owe you anything after all I did but I need you here, just like I know you need it in your soul to come back and put everything behind you”

“When is the next court date?” I don’t know what I was pulling

myself in. I didn’t only have to face the people who talked and looked my way in a form of disgust but I will also have to face my family. The one I worked so hard to forget and heal from, I could almost see it. I got out of the office early and rushed towards the ranch. “I need a ride” I scream when I see Rip climbing down from his horse.

“Beth is not going to like that” I hit his arm earning a fake groan.

“Not that kind of ride, I need to go see John” Rip laughs

“Well I thought since you never in your life would ask to be on a horse” He shruggs pulling his horse into the stable. “But no can do, you will have to wait til tomorrow” I look over at the direction he was looking and see Beth making her way down the path towards his cabin. “Ask Kaycee” I looked over to where he was pointing. He was getting out of his truck and going into the house. I turn towards him again. “Those eyes always worked but not against the fire in Beth’s” I roll my eyes.

“I hope she burns you” I scream walking out the barn and into the house.

“I didn’t expect you to be here for lunch?” I look over to see Monica in the kitchen. “I can cook something real fast for you, without Tate here I am going crazy not doing anything after school” I smile climbing on to the stool.

“No thank you. I have a long walk ahead of me” She questions me with her look. “I have to talk with John. I am leaving planning to leave for a couple of days”

“Where?”

“Home” I sigh, getting up. “If I leave soon enough I won’t have time to question why” I smile knowing she doesn’t need to know anything about what's going on. I grab some water and head towards the door.

“You can’t go dressed like that” This time I was wearing sneakers but she was right, the clothes were appropriate. Then again I didn’t have anything else. “Am packing since there is no reason for me to stay here so you can borrow some of my clothes”

“It's okay, I can just dirty some old clothes” I watch Monica shake her head, grabbing my arm and pulling towards Tates room where she has been staying.

“I have seen your wardrobe and they are not going to keep you warm enough and comfortable enough to get there and back” I whisper a thank you as I watch her pull out some clothes for me.

“Do I look funny?” I say walking out the bathroom already changed and with her boots on.

“Other than the hair, you no longer look like a city girl” My hair was still down and with curls in place.

“Thank you” I look over to the window and see the sun going down. “I need to go”

“You won’t take a horse?”

“No. Am not afraid of them but I am afraid of falling” I say walking out the door with her following close behind.

“That's why you hold on tight” she smiles as I open the door.

“That would help if I also knew even the first thing in riding one” I wave goodbye before starting my walk down the path. I run miles and walk even more than them so how could this be any different?

Let me tell you. Huge!! Difference. First of all, I am not in a warm facility running in the same spot. I am out in the fields freezing in every inch of my body. Second I am not surrounded by four walls to protect me and in company of people that show to not be harmful. Right now I am currently walking in the middle for everyone to see me. There are creatures here that can tear me to shreds in a second. Why in the hell did I decide to do this while the sun was coming down, down came the temperatures and so did my energy. But I needed to do this today. I was planning to leave in the late morning. I knew this trip was going to take a long time regardless of how I got there.

“Are you crazy!?” I scream, kneeling down to the ground and looking around my surroundings “Y/N?” Of course the not long enough grass wasn’t covering me.

“Kaycee?” The yellow/orange hue of the sun was disappearing so it was hard to see from a distance who it was.

“Monica told me you decide to walk instead of riding” I rolled my eyes about to say something “I know you don’t know how to ride but you could have asked Rip or another cowboy here” I cross my arm as he comes down his horse. “Rip or me” he corrected himself. All the other cowboys were with John. It was nice of him to follow me but when he starts off telling me things I knew I did wrong it reminds me of how mad I am with him. “Where are you going?”

“To see John” I had already turned around and walked away.

“Let me give you a ride, that's why I came here” so nice of you, but no. Stupid. “Stop” I hear him scream from behind. I get startled by the sound of the horse coming closer to cut me off “I said stop!” I look up annoyed

“Just leave, I will get there eventually” I look down, focusing on the horse itself. How scary. In my life I have never been so close to an animal bigger than me. I don’t know what came over me but my hands started reaching out to touch its main. That was until my hands were grabbed and I could no longer feel the ground. “Let me down!” My body was placed over the horse, stomach down.

“You don’t get to pet the horse until you stop being so stubborn” The horse wasn’t going quick but the anxiety in me did.

“Kaycee” I reach over to grab anything not trusting myself to touch the horse in any way that could affect it. The hand he used to hold on to me quickly moved to position me up.

“It’s okay” I was currently facing forwards with his arms wrapped around me for support.

“You’re so stupid” I whisper. I didn’t know if I was shiving because I was cold or how afraid I was right now. The horse continued walking now. My eyes stayed shut as I leaned further back.

“You’re the stupid one. Coming down here alone not even with a horse. You know we have wolves here right?” I nod my head slowly. “These clothes would keep you warm for a while not for a long walk” I nod my head again, taking hold of his hand that he was removing from mine. “ I need to take hold of the reigns”

“Okay” I nod but not noticing I was still holding on to him until he chuckles and stops the horse to get down.

“Slide down” I look down with panic in my eyes. This time I shake my head no and he rolls his eyes. He quickly grabs hold of my waist and pulls me back trying not to alarm the horse. Before I can argue he gets on and my arms instantly wrap around his waist. “Hold on. We need to get there before we freeze out here” I wasn’t listening to him. I was only holding on tight with my eyes closed and pressed up against him. I was afraid. I was afraid of something I could control. The horse I was on I couldn’t control. It could take off and drop us somewhere causing pain. Other things I was afraid of was anything involving me on it or in it that moved on its own. Elevators, cars other people were driving, ferris wheels, hell I was afraid of bridges no matter the length. “I'm sorry” The wind was a distraction but I still heard him. “I told you I would listen and all I didn’t was question you. I had no right”

“Am going back home” Silence fell. “Not because of what you said”

“Of course” I could hear the sense of humor in his voice. “When do you leave?”

“In the morning hopefully” My voice was no longer shaking. “They are having trials. They think they can just settle a deal and be done but I won’t let them. Settling falls more on his favor and that I won’t stand”

“Do you know the person who he did it too?” I nod my head.

“Back then I knew too. I didn’t have the right to say anything”

“But that could’ve changed everything”

“Maybe that's what I wanted. I had a chance to tell them and I was going too until they would let me talk. I thought to myself maybe it's for the best. I wanted to get away for so long. Why not let it run its course?”

“And now you are helping them?”

“She’s family. We might not be a perfect family but we promised that we would be different” We promised we wouldn’t make the same mistakes as our parents. They are all fighting to keep their appearance and be the best. They talk behind eachothers back and the next second hug and talk about how great each of them are. We told eachother we would never be like that. We protect eachother but most importantly listen and understand. Because we know we are not perfect, it's us against everyone else.

NOT A CHAPTER

This will be insert of storylines that happens in the future if Yn and Kayce

Chapter 14: Part 1

Chapter 13:

“When am I going to be a big brother?” My eyes almost popped out of their sockets. I turned over to Tate seeing how he looked at me before both our eyes looked over to Kayce. He was sitting on the other rocking chair as we enjoyed the morning light. “My friend just got a little brother and my other friend already has two” he turned back to me with a wide smile and hope in his eyes. “I want three so I can beat them but I will settle with one” I couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“Buddy, Y/N and I need to talk about it first. It's a decision we can only make but am glad you are all for it” Tate stands up from my lap facing us both.

“Listen I understand so let me tell you what's on the table” I looked over to Kayce who had a slight grin on his face. “You know I don’t mind sharing and being nice but with a sibling I will learn so much more. I will be more responsible. Protective. I will have a love for teaching because I will be teaching them everything about the world they don’t know. As an only child I will be such a mess!” I subdue the laugh I wanted so badly to let out.

“You know some studies have linked only children with having superior verbal skills. Others have concluded only children are more motivated and better adjusted. And not to mention they get better grades.” I say sipping on my coffee.

“I promise to get better grades! To study day and night and do all my chores on time!” He comes closer to me.

“Bud. We expect that of you either way, not the all day and night thing but we will keep that in account when your father and I have the discussion of your sibling”

“Yay. I need to go tell grandpa” He ran off before I could hold him back.

“Your sibling? As in present tense?” I look over with a smile. I kicked off the blacket and set down my coffee.

“Don’t get too excited cowboy” I move over to sit on his lap. “You haven’t even made me your wife” I lift my hand to show him an empty finger.

“I thought you didn’t care much about marriage” he wraps his arms around me pulling me back. I lay my head on his shoulder as he pulls the blanket he had on us.

“I can make an exception” I smile, digging my head into his neck.

“With the sibling before marriage or marriage?” I pull back looking dead in his eyes.

“Both” My smile drifted away wanting to see his reaction before getting my hopes up. I know he was smiling and grinning talking to Tate and teasing me but now it was a serious conversation.

“I would love to give Tate a sibling. I just want us to be on the same page” His hand moved to my cheek and down my neck pulling me closer so my forehead rested on his. “I don’t want this to rush us into something you are not ready for or don’t want” I know what he meant. Before we started dating we got into an argument like we always did when we talked. I told him I didn’t want to be held back by people. People usually disappointed me and I found a way to either disappoint them or kick them out of my life. So as far as that goes I told him I wouldn’t think twice about having a kid. It wasn’t something I wanted to ruin.

“I know what I said before and that doesn’t change the fact that I am still scared.” I move my hands up his chest to rest on the side of his face. “I don’t need a ring to know that I want this” I give him a quick kiss. “I want you, Tate, and your crazy family” I hear him chuckle. “I also want your future kids but maybe not right now” I cuddle closer to him resting my head on his shoulder as we both look out the distance. “I want to enjoy you and Tate before we add to the world” He lays a kiss on my head wrapping his arms tightly around me.

“If that is what you want” He whispers in my ear.

“You don’t want that?” With a slight humor in my voice but I was worried what he was going to say next.

“I want what you want” I pull a little back, turning over to look at him. “We are a team but when it comes to your body it's your choice. I will do and give anything you are okay with” I laugh laying back down

“Where’s my orchard?” I say with sass in my voice. “I want my orchard and you have yet to give me one” I smile hearing a huff behind me. “You know I can always go back to Gideon” This time it was a groan I heard. I was lifted off the chair and placed to stand on the porch.

“Damn woman, What I got to do to keep you happy” He shakes his head grabbing onto his hat but I stopped him from putting it on.

“You still love me right?” I whisper, putting my hand behind my back. He had gone down one step on the stairs so it even out our height a bit.

“That should never be questioned ma’am” I smile walking closer. “That is why to show you I will plant you an even bigger orchard than that Gideon guy” He rolled his eyes looking in another direction. I laugh at his response. I take the hat from behind me and place it on his head. He turns towards me, lifting his head. I plant a kiss on his lips pulling away with a smile.

“Oranges and apples” I whisper still close to him

“Yes ma’am” he smiles, pulling me closer by wrapping his arms around me.

“Should’ve gotten a cowboy a long time ago”

“But you were too busy messing with those city boys” I laughed hitting his shoulder. “If you had just given me a chance years ago” I laugh a little louder pulling him away

“What are you talking about?!” Years ago he was still with Monica. I heard them arguing once but it wasn’t like couples don’t argue. The only interaction we had together was dinners and maybe the occasional hello, how are you?, and goodbye. We didn’t get a chance to continue as Tate was running up to us screaming.

“Dad!” With a giant smile he runs up to the porch to stand beside me looking over to Kayce. “Grandpa thought it was a good idea. He said once the baby is born he is going to buy another horse so I could train him!” I hold in my laugh this time not wanting to give hime hope. I watch as Kayce kneels down infront of him. He took a quick glance at me and with a smile and a nod he knew what to say.

“Buddy I know you are excited but y/n and I decided to wait. That doesn’t mean you won’t be a big brother, it's just not going to happen right now” I can already tell he has a sad look in his face as his shoulders slump down and as he looks up at me my statement is made true.

“That's okay, I understand. '' I smile gently, getting down aswell.

“I promise you” I look over at Kayce before moving closer to Tate’s ear. “It won’t be long. So you better start practicing before then”

“You’re right!” He smiles, pulling away. “I need to learn how to change diapers, oh! And how to wash their bottles.” He continues to mumble to himself as he walks through the house door. I turn over to Kayce looking him dead in the eye.

“What?” He smiles

“Don’t you have work to do?” I say sternly with my arms crossed

“Yes ma’am” He bows his head, turning around.

“I love you”

“I love you too,” He shouts. I know I don’t want a baby right now but he is really making it hard as I see him walk away. I can imagine him with Tate by his side. Both holding one hand of a baby who is learning how to walk. Maybe another baby in Kayces arms as they walk throught the ranch. Laughing and smiling.

“I need to get on birth control soon” I whisper to myself.

“You should have gotten on it a long time ago” I jumped back, turning to see Beth standing behind me. “I mean I know you were never much out there but I know Kayce and you do it like rabbits”

“So you will understand why I need it more than ever. Even more now that Tate has brought an idea that won’t be going away anytime soon”

“I thinks it's a great idea”

“Of course you do Beth” I smile wrapping my arms around her. “But you are just going to have a to wait like the others”

“Not long right?” She laughs.

“If I don’t get on birth control, no” We both laugh knowing my words scared me but the humor it cost her eased my nerves.

BLACK AND BLOOD

Y/N L/N is the daughter of the Great Khal Drogo although she was raised by the king of the unknown lands. After finding out he died she travels and finds the one who caused his death. Along this adventure she meets the mother of dragons. Jon Snow. Night walkers. We will see if she really has the Dothraki blood flowing through her veins.

Chapter 14:

After the eventful morning I spent the rest of the day with Stella. “I'm hungry!” she pouted.

“Seriously?” I questioned her. We were on the way to get dinner served and she was whining. I shake my head at her walking a little faster than her.

“Hey! Until I get food in my system you know i'm cranky” I roll my eyes. We take a seat at one of many tables in the room. The food is beautifully presented but I can’t get myself to touch anything.

“I need to take care of something, I will be right back” I didn’t wait for a response as I got up and started to walk towards Daenerys. “I need to have a word with you” She looks up from her seat as everyone else in the long table with her, including Jon.

“Can it wait? We are celebrating.” She stands up with a smile. “We are on our way at first light to take over the seven kingdoms and put an end to Cersei’s reign” The few Dothraki and Unsullied together with northernmen screamed out in celebration. “Once this war is over there will be peace in the lands once again!” I knew I could wait until the end of dinner but that was when I was departing. The boat was ready and Grisill was already waiting for me. I turn and make my way to Stella.

“Are you going to wait?” I shake my head. I already gave the orders to Greyworm. I got Gemma, Stella and the baby situated. It doesn’t matter at the end of the day what Daenerys says, she can be happy or sad about my departure but it isn’t going to change the fact that I am leaving and not helping her with the war against Cersei.

“Princess?” I look to my left and see Jon sitting next to me. He took hold of my hand underneath the table.

“What do we owe the honor of you at our table, your grace?”

“Well since we are to be we-” I cover up his mouth before removing my hands in seconds. At first we didn’t try to keep us a secret but it was an unspoken rule to lay low. Now we don’t care much about the audience and who knows about us but I can’t let his tongue slip out infront of Stella just yet.

“I apologise, your grace.” I point my eyes towards my sister hoping he gets the hint on what I am thinking.

“Ways. Since we are to be ways aparts,-” His eyes were searching for words and his long pause didn’t help his case.

“I understand” I repond. “I know my family will be safe in Winterfell” I go back to my meal not directing any more attention to Jon or Stella.

“Y/N” oh thank you. I turned around relieved someone was going to get me out of this awkward conversation. I stand up following Grisill out to the hall and find Bran there too. “Father has captured most of the Dothraki in Omnius and is planning to move across the wall once he has captured all '' No thank you. I prefer being stuck in the middle of Jon and Stella than to deal with this.

“It's true. You two need to leave as soon as possible.” I give a nod towards Grisill and he moves to get into the ship. “Y/N '' I look over to Bran who comes closer “Stay safe” I could see his mind circling through his eyes. “Um, just be safe, extra safe” I give him a simple smile before rushing back into the room. I hug Stella from behind and give her a kiss on the cheek.

“I will be back before you know it. Keep Gemma and the baby safe” She wraps her arms around mine.

“Of course, out of us two I was always the better fighter” I roll my eyes moving to sit next to Jon but having my back face the rest.

“My father is causing and planning to do more damage in the next few days, I need to leave now” I look up meeting his eyes. “Just you and I?” I whisper.

“You and I” I smile, grabbing his face and pulling him closer.

“I love you” I pulled him in for our last kiss in a long time. I wasn’t scared to show that I cared for this man, because no amount of affection or words can come close to demonstrating the love I have for him. I get up and take a look around the room. Greyworm, Sansa, Arya and even Missandei gave me a nod knowing where I was off too. Daenerys, Torion, Varys, and the rest have a confused look on their faces but I have no time to explain. I give them all a sincier smile before exiting and rushing out the gates. The land disappeared faster than I would have wanted but it meant that I was miles closer to home.

“They are going to be okay” I look over my shoulder and see my brother walking closer. I know they were going to be safe, I just can’t help but worry. “Stella, Gemma and the baby have Winterfell looking out for them.” I look over and he has a smile on his face.

“Aren’t you worried? You just met them a few hours ago” He shurggs turning around to lean against the ships rails.

“Of course I am. But I know you trust them so I know I can trust them too” I nod my head looking over to the direction winterfell is. “I also know he will be okay too” I roll my eyes, turning my head the opposite direction. “I mean come on! Did you hear he survived those things” he paused for a minute. “White walkers? He survived wars with every odd against him, hell he survived death itself” He moves closer to whisper in my ear “He survived you” I push him off and hear his laugh as I walk away to my cabin.

“Get some rest. We have a long way to go!” I close the door, throwing myself on the bed. I close my eyes and let the sleep engulf me. It was the only thing I could do that would allow myself to stop thinking about everything. About Stella, she hates strange places. Gemma and the baby, it must be hard for her to be far away from Gris. I know she has done it before but I'm guessing it's nothing easy to do everytime. I worry about the Starks. Yes Jon has beat every thing coming towards him even death, but that doesn’t mean it will happen again.

“I will go in and I will have someone come find you.” That is a horrible plan but I only gave him a nod. He scurries away in broad daylight passing by the guards walking around the streets of people. There is no way I am standing here and allowing him to go alone. If my gut is right, which it always is, all the people in that castle have bid their loyalty to my father. I follow close behind and try to avoid guards or any other person to see me under my cloak. I got rid of my winter clothes on the ship and switched over to the silk clothes we wear on hot days. Every inch of the castle was surrounded by guards. I watch as Gris gets closer and is captured by two men. They yap a couple minutes before bringing him in. I could use the tunnels that reach the stables but from then you have to pass the armoury. I rush up to the top of a building. You can see the center hall but not the back. I could try to climb the walls but the archers would be able to see me. I catch movement on the outside balcony of the castle, I continue to watch many guards going into a room. I know that room. I rush down the steps and on my way to the tunnels but before I reach the doors I get tackled onto the grounds.

“Shh!” I struggle to be released but I soon stop fighting and allow the person to guide me backwards around the corner. Some guards search around for the noise but after a minute they walk away.

“I saw your brother and I knew you would be close by if he walked through those gates alone” I looked up annoyed. “Oh right” He lets go. “Sorry” I dust myself off and I look around. “Everyone has new orders to go searching for you. The tunnels are guarded” Fuck.

“Do you know another way in?”

“Yes, follow me” The tunnels were hidden on the side of the castle. Many would not stop to look at the tunnels since it seemed like an abandoned building, broken down and dusty, but if you walk far enough and take the right turn you will end up straight in the castle walls. “Not that I have done this before or anything but you can use the servant entrance” I watch him pull out some clothes from his bag. “You are going to have to change. Those clothes will give you straight away.” As we continue to walk I start to change the clothes.

“How do you know my brother?”

“On my rounds I met him. He is the reason I don’t use this entrance anymore” Of course. My brother always wants to help everyone. “I help him escape weeks ago”

“Has it gotten worse since he left?” He stays silent and only nods. We walk up to the woods close enough to see a river flowing straight into the castle. How could I forget this place? I used to spend my time here with my mother, she always said my life couldn’t be surrounded by gold and silver, we needed to get our hands dirty once in a while.

“I will create a distraction and you will join the servants at the river.” I give him a nod. He walks out the woods acting like a drunk. The two guards at the entrance of the river rush to get a hold of him as I rush to stand close to the servants.

“Princess Y/N?” I look to my right and see a familiar maid who was always around me.

“Ida” I smile, grabbing a basket of clothes. “I need to get inside the walls” She nods. She motions for me to follow and I do. We walk directly inside.

“With all the respect, your grace but are you here to free us from your father?” I nod my head finally able to let out the breath I was holding.

“Yes Ida.” I look around and I don’t recongnize the room. It's mostly empty and cold. “I need to get to the cells''

“Oh I can take you!” She said a little to hyped up. I shake my head no. I can’t have her close to me just in case they catch me.

“I can’t put you in harms way”

“Ok well, you can take this hall all the way down until you get to the stairs, then” Then? Then there was darkness. I was so fixed on looking at the door that led to the hall that I didn’t take care of my surroundings. The last thing I could feel was my body hitting the cold floor. The second I open my eyes I could see the ceiling passing by while I started struggling to release my arms and legs.

“Let me go!” The pounding in my head got worse but that didn’t matter, I needed to be set free. I focused on the guard's face but they were none of who I remember in the castle.

“His grace is waiting for you” I crunched up enough to see the guards to the front open a door. “You’re late Princess”

BLACK AND BLOOD

Y/N L/N is the daughter of the Great Khal Drogo although she was raised by the king of the unknown lands. After finding out he died she travels and finds the one who caused his death. Along this adventure she meets the mother of dragons. Jon Snow. Night walkers. We will see if she really has the Dothraki blood flowing through her veins.

Chapter 15:

I could feel my father’s stare on me from the moment I passed through the doors. The guards placed me and tied me up to the chair right beside Gris. He looked badly beaten up. Once the guards moved I could finally see my fathers face again. Some of his right hand men were beside him. The room was some kind of dungeon except there were windows and we were certainly on the main floor of the castle. I stared directly into my father's eyes trying to get anything out of him, he seemed lost. His beard has grown longer than before. His eyes filled with sadness and pain. A cane present on the hand that never needed one before. He was young but now he could pass as a Walker. He scoffs, directing his eyes away from mine and begins to walk out. “Can’t even stand there and look into my eyes to tell me what the hell you have become?!” I didn’t want to be the first one to talk but he left me no choice. He was going to just walk out? Leave me and his son tied up in a chair while he seems half dead? “The man I admire the most” A lump stuck in my throat but I continued. “The man who taught me everything I know” My mouth is so dry. “The man who built a place people years ago couldn’t imagine just-”

“I AM NOT THAT MAN ANYMORE!” His loud voice pushed me back in my seat. The fire in his eyes got bigger but I knew I couldn’t stop there. He was either going to burn himself down or this whole kingdom down, but I wasn’t going to let either go down. “They took that from me!” I shake my head. The Dothraki did something terrible yes but nothing like he is doing right now. “She made me a better person and you!” he paused, taking a hold of his chest. “You, the one who was supposed to stay here, the one who swore to protect them left!”

“You can’t hold that against me! You taught me to do what I most desire and that's what I did! I got out of here!”

“AND NOW YOUR MOTHER AND SISTER ARE DEAD!” I shake my head. It wasn’t my fault. He is hurt and in pain but it wasn’t my fault. I feel his rough hand grab my chin to look up at him. “You can tell yourself anything you want but It is all your fault. If you hadn’t intervened to save your so-called queen they would have respected the treaty. They wouldn’t have attacked and your mother and sister would be alive” He pushes me away harshly. The tears sting my eyes wanting to be let out.

“What they were doing was wrong and you know that. You know I had a right to fulfill in Dothraki. I don’t regret what I did” He struts to me, landing a hand on my cheek and then the other.

“You had an obligation here! You always had and never did you take such pleasure in fulfilling that obligation like you did for the Dothraki” I look up not fazed by his words. He always knew I was no one to fill his shoes. He told me to run and do what I wanted as long as I always came back to see them. To not live an unhappy life doing things just because people expect things from me. To never promise when in my heart there was an obvious choice. “You never stepped up to accept your responsibility or own up to it. You always did what you liked and never apologized for your actions. Those are some things you never took up from your mother”

“I am not her!” That one stinged. “I was never and will never be her. No matter how many times people say I am her. No matter if all I did was follow her around until the day I left. I WILL NEVER BE HER. As for me being selfish you are so wrong. All I ever did was try to make you happy. Maybe I wasn’t as happy about it but I was there. I was there going to consuels with you. Taking a trip to the people to hear their complaints. I took a class about what every ruler should know. I STEPPED UP!. I didn’t want to but I was there. I never did one thing from me until I left. I know I had my doubts but up until the point I got the news about Drogo and you told me to follow what I believe in. That it was finally my time to live. I thought you were okay with it, because until then I was going to accept the crown. For you and for everyone, I was doing it for everyone else but me! So who is the selfish one?” He comes closer taking out his knife and slowly running it down my face.

“You will never be her. You will never suffice anyone. No matter what words you try to use to explain yourself you know deep down you will never be good enough for nothing” My eyes stare blankly at him as the blade continues to trace down until it reaches the end. With that he stands up straight and walks out as do the rest of the people in the room. When the door closed I rapidly tried to wake Gris up. “Come on, we need to get out of here!” I whisper yell knowing there were guards outside the door. Damnit. The rope around my wrist was painful but I pulled and pulled until I finally released myself. I drained my body from most of my energy. My bones ached and my eyelids felt heavier than it ever did before. I look out the window and see the sun coming down. I hurry to untie my legs and continue on with Gris but stop mid untying. He can barely move, he is better off staying here. I look around only to see a torch. I guess that has to work. “Can I get some water?!” I hid behind the door and as the first one came in I knocked him out and that the other one out with a hit in the throat. I tie their hands together and gag them before continuing down the hall. It was a secluded hall. A hall we were not welcomed to go into and now I can see why. I make my way down to the cells and see an image I wish to erase from my memory. Dothraki all piled up. The smell came from some who were surrounded by their own blood.

“Princess” One says in their tongue. I turn over, nodding my head. I hurriedly opened up the cells so let them out.

“We need to free the rest and then get out of here” This night can go any which way. I just hope whatever happens, we do the right thing. I watched the Dothraki unlock the rest until there was no cell left locked. “We will take the night to our advantage. We work better with our hands anyways” I speak to them at the bottom of the stairs. “There are guards everywhere guarding every inch of this castle. There are more cells and I will take a group to free the rest of our people and for the rest, you will take care of every guard” I motioned them to follow.

“My name is Iter” A dothraki beside me whispers. “I heard many things about the Drogo Princess”

“Call me Y/N” I smile towards him while avoiding any guards. We get to the cells below and I send men to unlock the cells and to tell them my orders.

“Is it true we traveled the sea?” He was young. Not an adult young, he was still a child. Dothraki grew big and tall and it was hard to tell the different in ages but the way he spoke so unexpericence, he hads to still be child.

“Yes” Calmly I continued along most of the cells without coming in contact with a guard or two. Most of them stayed outside the doors but by using the walls we could get in and out. We used the walls to continue our way to gather weapons. Gris was brough out and once I knew he was out of harm's way we stood outside the gate of the castle. Dothaki men, women and children stood beside me.

“We stand with you Drogo Princess. Lady of the Night. Our Khalessi” I look over to the man beside me. His name was Rohno. I don’t deserve any of those names.

“Y/N” He looked unfazed. He stood up straight looking at the motions on the gates walls. I look over and by the figure thanks to the many nights I sneaked arounded in the castle unable to sleep I can tell it was my father.

“You can try to run but I will continue to chase until all of you are dead!” He screamed from ontop of the walls.

“You got us mistaken, father! We are not running away, we are here to fight!” The Dothraki starts screaming. “Unless you want to talk it through and agree to stop all this tyranny” It hurt my heart to let those words out to my father. The man I once looked up to. I know he is hurting and needs help but he isn’t allowing us to do that. His pain has created a dark hole in him and is trying to fix it with killing innocent people. Not all were Dothraki in the field. They were our people too. People from Omnis.

“I am doing what is right. I was blind a long time ago to think these people could live in peace. It caused me the greatest pain and I am not going to allow them to cause anymore. Call it whatever you want but I will never again rule in peace as long as they are still alive!”

“They are not the problem. They were following their leader, one who they swore their loyalty to!. Sounds familiar? He was the problem, not all of them” I pointed at the Dothraki behind me.

“You are so naive!” I see his figure move away. I look up around as the archers take their stand. “I will avenge your death, my daughter!” I hear his faint voice but I can no longer see him.

“We will stand by you,” Rohno says. The only noise other than our quicken breath is the string in the bows.

“Fire!” I close my eyes, holding my breath.

“We need to move” I open my eyes. I nod, taking hold of my sword and rushing forward. I missed the arrows and now we are running towards the food. Dothraki are screaming behind me, ready to fight for their freedom. We make noise on the door and they open. Not because my father felt kind enough to but because I left men inside for this moment. The doors open and we are met by guards, not enough. I look over and make my way towards the stairs. I need to find my father.

“I want him alive, no one kills him,” Rohno nods, rushing up ahead. I avoid a sword to my head, kneel down and stash it in the guards stomach. The Dothraki moves most of the guards out of the way as my vision is just focused on catching my father. Once the crowd that covered him is cleared he just stands there. No weapon. Not even his cane in hand. His fierce eyes only looked at me.

“You wouldn’t kill me.” He laughs, turning around to walk away. I take out the knife in my belt and throw it towards him. “Oh!” he screams, falling to the ground. He twisted his leg, taking out the knife and throwing it out the way.

“You’re right, I would never. I love you too much”