The Thing About Abusers And Lying Is They Start Off Subtle.

The thing about abusers and lying is they start off subtle.

My dad loves bike riding so he used to take me all the time. I didn’t really enjoy it but I didn’t have a choice. One of the first times he overtly lied to me was when he told me we were going on a six mile bike ride. He knew I didn’t want to do more than that. Afterwards, he told me it was actually nine miles.

At first glance, it seems sweet. The whole “actually you can do this”. But he did it again. And again. And again. It was to the point where I would regularly ask him and have to check with my mum “this is actually what he says it is right? This isn’t a trick?”

It meant that I couldn’t trust what he was saying to be true and that continued in various other shapes and forms all the way up until now. I never know when he’s lying and I don’t fully trust my own version of things when he’s involved.

Abuse isn’t always big and loud and obvious. Gaslighting isn’t always big and loud and obvious. Sometimes it can be as little as lying just often enough that you start to doubt your senses and can’t trust anyone anymore. Sometimes it’s about something as little as a bike ride.

There are times when I relate to Villainelle deeply. A lot of the time she knows that what she’s doing is wrong (ie. not what people want). But occasionally she’ll do something morally wrong that she thinks people genuinely want her to do and therefore it must be right. And then she gets so confused when people are angry at her.

There’s that haunting look of utter hurt puzzlement in her eyes because she did what they asked so why is she being punished?

And that is such a neurodivergent experience it pains me.

I’m talking mainly about things like thick carpets and rocky ground, gravel etc. Quite a lot of disabled people (myself included) struggle with energy levels and keeping up putting in the effort to push against a resistant floor is really tiring.

Partially a phrasing issue on my end but yeah.

Something that really sucks about being disabled is places say that they’re accessible but they aren’t.

I’ve been to places that claim to be accessible where

the ramp’s too steep

there are steps they didn’t mention because “it’s only two or three”

the doorways are too small

there aren’t any elevators to the top floor

the floor is too rough to easily push on

exhibits are displayed in ways that are impossible to see from a wheelchair

the doors don’t have a push button

tables/exhibits are put way too close together

the surrounding paths have no curbs

Without those things, it isn’t accessible. You can’t put a sloped piece of metal on your doorway and call that wheelchair friendly.

Hi, im really happy I just discovered this account. I have had M.E/CFS since I was 9, snd it is really hard. I used to love being active, I loved football and stuff, but then I got glandular fever and everything went downhill. Its nice to see a channel that recognises that growing up with a disability or chronic fatigue isn't easy, and actually acknowledge that we exist and we aren't just 'being lazy'. So thank you ❤️

You’re welcome! I used to be a really active kid too. I played football, ran around, played badminton, went on walks etc. Now I leave the house only to go to therapy. It’s really hard especially when you’re young. There are all these expectations and external pressures. We do exist and we can survive ❤️

r/fdc is so funny because there are posts that have captions like “17yo with a disorder” “40yo? 40 years of faking more like” with a photo of an intro post that literally just says “hi I’m ___ I have ___ and I like ___” and there is no other context for why they’re assumed to be faking.

These people are genuinely posting “this person has a disorder so they are FAKING”. Who the fuck does have the disorder then Jeremy???? Can you name a single person????Are you having an existential crisis over whether disorders exist????

Quality entertainment if you’re stable enough. Look after yourselves <3

anyway

aplatonic people are beautiful and good and deserving. having language to express how they experience the world is not a bad thing, and should Never be framed as such.

if you are aplatonic because of a personality disorder, you belong.

if you are aplatonic because of autism, you belong.

if you are aplatonic because of trauma, you belong.

if you are aplatonic because of a fatigue disorder, you belong.

if you are aplatonic because you're just happier on your own, you belong.

if you are aplatonic because of another reason i can't think of rn, you belong.

you are real, and you matter, and you deserve to find pride in being yourself.

- sincerely, an aroacespec