@the-wip-project Day 31 (I Finally Understood The Question!! Yay! I Was Waiting To Read Other Replies

@the-wip-project Day 31 (I finally understood the question!! Yay! I was waiting to read other replies to see what I didn't get - pardon my English)

So now I can answer: 🔞

What’s a pet peeve you have, that you focus on to do differently in your own stories?

In intimate, or even downright smutty moments, I literally skip depiction of "bedroom eyes", or other "liking lips for entrance", or "liking lips in anticipation". That kind of stuff makes me C R I N G E like nothing else does. It's porn, but it's poor, cheap porn to me and I can't stand to see my favorite characters shown in that light. They deserve better smut!

I don't pretend the smut scenes I write are the best, but as much as I can, I don't objectify my characters, nor do I use what I call unnecessary details that just make the whole thing a mood-killer.

@the-wip-project Day 29

First, thank you for pointing out ProWritingAid! I'm using it right now and the advice it gives is so much more consistent than Grammarly! The advice is really enlightening; I'm learning important things!

The question now:

What's a common theme in your writing?

There's no way to tackle that question other than directly: Family relationships are central to all my stories, and more specifically, how the individual can let their personality grow, express themselves and fulfil their goals or dreams in and out of the family circle.

One of my school years's reads (and study) had been "Nourritures Terrestres" by André Gide, from which the famous quote "Famille, je vous hais!" (Family, I hate you) comes from. I remember it had resonated powerfully inside me at the time, dealing with complicated relationships with my own family. The theme in the book advocated existentialist theories, advocating an individualistic stance, disobedience to educational principles, on the premise that a family was a closed-off space, where jealousy and pettiness festered, where sexism and other forms of moral violence thrived. The book dates back from 1897 and of course society was not what it was when I was a teen (Good Lord, thank you) but some representations were sadly still current (and still are, to be honest)

It turned out that it took nothing more to shed a different light on what was happening around me. And although I never took such a drastic decision as to disown my family, like Gide advised, I started thinking about what my place was, and what I wanted it to be. Ironically, I decided little about what happened thereafter; I more or less watched things happen with painful clarity, never knowing what to do with what was thrown at me. I'm a firm believer in communication; so nothing is more frustrating than when it doesn't work. Misunderstanding was ripe, division reigned, and living far away didn't help.

In hindsight, I still don't know what I could have done differently, and although I reached an even state of satisfaction in my personal life, my family is the shadow of what it used to be. I did reach that state where I can express myself freely and be at peace with whom I want to be. Outside of my family indeed; but it saddens me to no end.

So, yeah, no surprise my stories are mostly all about family misunderstandings, secrets, division and reconciliation, hurt and comfort.

@vividly-creative

I read you and I feel you *hugs*

I've had similar thoughts about all the stories I've created (I'm having them right now for my 18-month old wip and the one I started... 3 days ago), a feeling that getting to the end is going to be so worthwhile because what I have in mind is so amazing, and at the same time so daunting that it actually stops me in my tracks, because what if I ruin this beautiful thing I have in my mind? What if it never reaches my expectations, and above all others'? And this is the one moment when the poisonous temptation to compare our work to others' pulls out its claws and drooling fangs.

From one thought to another, one day, I eventually considered things from a different point of view and came to a certain conclusion that I'd like to share with you. Maybe it'll ring something inside you, or maybe not.

Recently I've said in a post that I was a planner, and I am. This is the only way for me to beat this whimsical habit of mine: procrastination. I'd procrastinate for almost everything, and while I wouldn't mind postponing work-related stuff, it'd suck more to see myself postpone hobbies that are supposed to make me feel good. Writing falls into that category. Except that procrastination is not just postponing (and it certainly isn't idleness, we know that) Procrastination is also when you decide to do/create/start/continue/review another task instead of the one you "were supposed to do" (please, note the quotation marks), for reasons ranging from subjective importance to objective inclination.

It's not a flaw, it's not even a bad habit, but it certainly is exhausting in the long run.

But procrastination tells us something about us, creators.

Procrastinating is dreading the moment when the project, our project, will reach its term. When we'll have to part from it, when this project will live on with a life of its own, where it's meant to be, exposed to other people's scrutiny and comprehension. When it's no longer ours, and we have no control over it anymore. And yet, our parenthood over this piece of work is intact. We've been its source of life, its legal guardian.

We're responsible for its existence, as well towards its outcome, by making sure it's prepared for what's to come, autonomous, viable, acceptable, defendable. Perfect.

The fear of separation and the quest for perfection go hand in hand with procrastination.

Setting up a deadline, a date, a goal to finish a wip is like scheduling this separation and the grief that'll come with it, because it feels like a part of us will leave too, and there'll be nothing we can do about it. So, we hope it'll go in the best of ways, with flying colours. When the moment comes, we hope we'll be up to it, that the void that'll come after will be tolerable (but if we have other wips on the backburner, it'll hurt less, won't it?)

So, yeah, this is how I feel when I write my stories. I love to see them grow, develop, gain confidence. I'm always eager to write them down, to read the words and sentences flow and discover what I wanted to write (honestly sometimes I don't even know what I write...) And I'm so looking forward to knowing the end (LOL!!) while dreading that moment when I'll have to say goodbye.

Nobody likes to say goodbye to something/someone we love. I said goodbye too many times, without knowing that things were actually over, without making sure that I was happy with the way things were between them and me, that this part of me could go without any reason for future concern or regret.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that your wips might go when you finish them, but you can be sure they'll meet amazing people (readers, publishers, you name it) and make them happy. Don't be afraid to finish them and let them go (at your own pace).

Your creativity will never let you down. Take care 🤗

Doubting Myself

Lately I’ve been creating a lot of stuff, back to back.

I’ve been writing a lot and bringing characters to life. I’ve been working so much on my novel, my word count is getting up, my word document is getting longer and I’ve been receiving positive feedback from my friends.

Still, I feel likeI’m barely making any progress.

I have brought so many ideas to life  and I’m proud of myself and of what I created… but  it feels like it doesn’t mean anything.

My portfolio could and should have much more work in it. It feels like I’m behind and I always will be.

No matter how much I create, I constantly feel like I could’ve made more and I need to make more.

I want to have this inhumane amount of art made within a couple of hours. 

The moment I start writing a scene I’m picturing how I want it to sound at the end and I start asking myself if I’ll be able to even finish it. The second I start a new sketch I begin ruminating how it should look and I want to skip the process to finally see the end result.

I have to keep reminding myself that a successful piece of art is the one that makes you proud and allows you to grow as an artist; but that does not mean it will always be satisfying and I get that.

I love to create.

I want to create.

I chose to create.

But it’s hard to enjoy the process sometimes, when you keep telling yourself “This is the time I will finish this novel.“

“This is the piece that I will finally send to publishers.” 

“This is the work that I will have hundreds of rejection slips and just that one approved, because it only takes one publisher to say yes.” 

“Today I’ll make the photograph that gets into a calendar.”

“This is the art project that will make people take me seriously.”

“This is the one that will make me an artist.”

It ’s exhausting.

@the-wip-project Day 28

Do you have an expression that you probably use too much in your writing?

I sometimes feel like my whole writing is nothing but an endless stream of the same expressions, the same syntax and the same words. Generally, this is the moment when my ever-so-caring self preserving reflex tells me that I need to read other works and other worlds to learn new sentences, new structures, new expressions. There was a time when I'd even note them down on a notebook (I should totally get back to that, come to think of it).

That reflex is actually more traitorous than I think (even after a couple of years - I'll never learn, right) because reading other works unfailingly stirs me to the edge of that self-deprecation chasm, where I stand for some time wondering if I should write at all. Come on, there are some many GOOD works out there (understand: far better)

I know this is a common feeling that many writers go through. Any tips? I'm really curious about how others deal with that?

@the-wip-project Day 15

Does your WIP have fairytales? Do your characters tell mythical stories to each other?

Yes, they do! And since my stories all take place in Asia, I've had a lot of fun digging out some interesting ones for lovely scenes. Here's an extract from one of the earlier chapters of WIP1:

“They’re well known folk-tales, which my eomeoni and halmeoni used to tell me when I was very young, back in Wonsan.” Hence why she thought about him when she found the book, Junghee believes: the idea that his mother is thinking about him fills him with some sweet nostalgia again and brings about the familiar lump that has kept him company here at the back of his throat. He’s so grateful she asked this book to be delivered to him; so grateful Jimin is the one who brought it to him.

“Let’s read some!” Jimin cheers, standing up. “Where’s that lamp you had?” Junghee hears him shuffle over the floor in the dark, blindly feeling along until he hears the scrape of metal. “Ah, here it is.” He winds it up, illuminating his face from underneath, as awake and lively as ever, before he takes his place back on the bed, by Junghee’s side this time, and directs the light towards the book. “So, pick one,” he adds. “Not too long though. And a happy one. Oh, and funny too.”

“Aish, hyung. Folk tales are not always funny. They’re meant to convey messages, lessons of tolerance, generosity, love and hope. This one, for instance, ‘The Two Brothers Who Threw Away Their Lumps of Gold.”

“You’ll have to tell me where the hope is here. The title alone is stupid. Pick another one.”

“But these two brothers love each other!”

“Doesn’t erase the fact they’re stupid…”

“Okay… so, ‘The Beggar Brothers’ —”

“No please, not poor people! I’ve had my share of poverty.”

Junghee pinches his lips to stifle a snicker, and flips more pages: “How about ‘The Net Bag for Catching a Tiger’? About how a man became rich.”

“Brilliant!”

They settle against the wall, bodies pressed close against one another across the narrow width of the bed, legs extended in front of them.

“Once upon a time, there was a poor young bachelor. [why are they always poor?] Because he was really poor, he went to the mountains to find something to eat, [sounds familiar…] but then it became nighttime. He found a house while wandering around and asked the old man who was the owner of the house, if he could sleep there for one night. The old man told the bachelor to come in. The old man was making a net bag with straw. The bachelor asked, ‘why are you making a net bag?’ The old man answered, ‘if a poor person goes into the net, that person will get a lot of money.’ [sounds fishy already] The bachelor was very interested, and asked, ‘May I get into the bag?’[what?] The old man answered, ‘Of course’. He got into the bag, which had been finished. Then the old man suddenly tied up the mouth of the net bag [I honestly saw that coming] tightly and hung it on a big branch in the mountain. The man screamed because he was scared. [Gosh, is he gonna lure the tiger with that poor bugger?]”

Junghee stops his reading, thinking, then yawns loudly.

“So? What happens next? Where's the tiger?”

“Hyung, aren’t you tired? I’m exhausted,” he whines, standing up to get to the bed where the blankets are. He climbs onto it and spreads the two blankets over him.

“Sun Junghee! What happens next? How does it end?” Jimin threatens, hurrying to his side with the lamp and poking him in the ribs.

tumblr mobile won't let me upload a voice recording, so I guess you're all spared hearing about my thoughts that people (some of them at least) aren't actually desperate for comments. What they're actually missing is community.