13. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Velvet Goldmine (1998)

13. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Velvet Goldmine (1998)

Happy Pride Month!❤️🌈❤️We've made it to 1998 and can take a breather because Ewan only made two movies this year. How appropriate that on the first week of Pride Month the first review is the LGBTQ film "Velvet Goldmine"! I swear I didn't plan this. Maxwell Demon must have arranged it in the stars 😏. Also, I came across three different runtimes for this movie. The version I watched had a runtime of 1 hour and 58 minutes so the Screentime Percentage is based off of that.

Fun Fact: Toni Collette co-stars in this movie. She was in "Emma" with Ewan!

Genre: Musical/Drama

Rating: R

Director: Todd Haynes

Starring: Christian Bale, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Ewan McGregor, Toni Collette

Synopsis: If you're someone who doesn't like musicals because of the "unrealistic" factor then you'll be happy to know that's not the case here. The movie is a musical because the characters are singers/musicians and they perform throughout the movie. The film is about British glam rocker Brian Slade who fakes his own death and disappears from the public in the 70s. Ten years later, Arthur Stuart, a journalist, is given the task to unearth what really happened to the rockstar and where he is now. His search brings him in contact with former stars who knew Slade and causes him to reflect on his own tumultuous past.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Curt Wild. Curt Wild is a gay American man who's the lead singer and guitarist of his band The Rats. Brian Slade is greatly inspired by Curt and convinces him to collaborate on some projects. Eventually, what starts as a professional relationship blossoms into something more. Ewan speaks with an American English accent for this role which sounds a little funny at times. He has long blond hair for some of the movie which I like. He has two male love interests and a kiss scene. There's also one sex scene and one implied sex scene. He pretty much never wears a shirt and in one scene even strips nude while performing! And yes, that means you get to see his penis. Speaking of performing, he sings thrice and two of those times are full performances. Fun fact: he sang all of his vocals live instead of lip syncing to a pre-recorded track while filming! As far as acting, I think he did well with the limited amount of screentime he had.

Screentime Percentage (numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 20/118 minutes making his SP 17%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes, even though he doesn't have much screen time, he makes the most of it. Is the movie worth watching in general? Yes, it's a great LGBTQ movie! Plus, the soundtrack is infectious.

Where to Watch: "Velvet Goldmine" is available for rent on YouTube, Google Play Movies and TV, Fandango at Home, and Amazon Prime Video. It's also currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the account SELVA BEATS. Just search "Velvet Goldmine 1998 filme raro leg". Heads up: the movie has Portuguese subtitles that can't be turned off. Lastly, you can pirate the movie on soap2day.

Closing Thoughts: This movie makes me go Wild (pun-intended😉) with each watch. The music, costumes, performances, acting, EVERYTHING makes my heart pound. When I watched it for the first time I said the same thing Arthur did in the movie, "That's me! That's me!" It's been 26 years since it was released and in 2024 I was able to say, "That's me." I felt hope. I felt less alone. And I know I'm not the only one who saw themselves and felt the same. "Velvet Goldmine" is a beautiful movie in every way and well worth a watch.

4. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Nothing but the Truth (1995)

TRIGGER WARNING: In this review, I mention sexual violence because that is what this movie is about. I don't go into great detail. Still, if the topic of sexual violence/assault is triggering for you then this is your warning to scroll past.

Ewan McGregor's first project of 1995 was the pilot episode of British television series Kavanagh Q.C. titled "Nothing but the Truth." You might be asking yourself, "television series? I thought those were going to be excluded?" You're right and the reason I included this episode in our movie review list is because it has a runtime of an HOUR AND FORTY-ONE MINUTES. Where I come from, we call that a movie. The episode is also a standalone project, meaning that you don't need to watch the whole series or even an additional episode to finish the plot or understand the narrative. Everything you need to know for the episode happens in the episode.

A couple fun facts before we get started!

In this project, Ewan works alongside Geraldine James again. You might remember her from our previous review as the ex-jazz singer in "Doggin' Around." I thought that was cool! Here, she plays Eleanor Harker Q.C. (Queen's Counsel) who is the prosecutor attorney.

If you've ever heard Ewan say that he met his wife while working on a project, THIS is that project! This is where he met his first wife, Eve Mavrakis, who is credited as the Assistant Art Director. The episode aired January 3, 1995 and six months later they were wed.

Let's dive in!

Movie Review: "Nothing but the Truth" stars the late John Thaw as the titular Kavanagh Q.C. James Kavanagh is a senior barrister and arguably the best. While he couldn't be more adept at his job as a barrister, the same cannot be said for his job as a husband and father. The demands of these roles pull him in different directions and cause friction between him and his wife. The main plot is about an affluent young man accused of sexually assaulting the woman for whom he works. Naturally, it's a he said/she said situation. He claims that it was a consensual fling while she claims the opposite. The evidence corroborates both of their stories to an extent which makes it even harder to know who is being honest. As one of the best lawyers in Britain, Kavanagh is tasked with defending the accused. Unfortunately, defending a man accused of rape only creates more cracks in the foundation of his familial relationships. Armed with his intellect and belief in the inherent goodness of man, Kavanagh is determined to find nothing but the truth.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character David Armstrong who is our young man accused of sexual assault. He has a posh English accent and is incredibly soft-spoken. He also has a stutter which sounds a bit forced at times. This role is my absolute favorite for his long, silky, hair era! We get a few shots of it in the half-up/half-down style but for the majority of the film it's all down. They must have given him a full on blow out because that hair was thick, long, and luscious! His hair needed it's own acting credit. Ewan also showcases his acting skills really well in this role. I've felt for a long time that Ewan performs best in roles that require subtlety and he does a great job in this one. On a more critical note, even though he often plays characters who are depicted in a negative light, those stories tend to require you to suspend your disbelief. That is not the case with this movie. This is a serious topic and the movie handles it with the seriousness it deserves. If Ewan brings you comfort and you only engage with his more wholesome roles, then this might not be for you. There are no graphic depictions of sex in the movie but there is sexual audio twice and in the court scenes the characters go into detail about the incident.

Screentime Percentage (All numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 21/101 minutes making his SP 21%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes, even with the low percentage! Again, his hair is *chef's kiss* 🤌. We get to see him sweaty and working in the dirt as well as dressed up in a three piece suit. There's also a brief makeout scene and shirtless scene. Is the movie worth watching in general? This is very difficult for me to say but my answer is no. My opinion is that the movie is /only/ worth watching for Ewan. If he wasn't in it or was in it even less then it'd be a skip for me. The premise is interesting but the movie can be slow in places. Also, maybe it's just because this was the pilot episode or the legal system being different in Britain, but there were significant issues not addressed in the court scenes that make the ending a little less satisfying. If you like crime shows, then you might like this regardless of the Ewan factor. But be warned, this is not a flashy, fast-paced drama like Law and Order SVU or Criminal Minds. It's an old, British, drama about an old lawyer.

Where to Watch: "Nothing but the Truth" is currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the channel "Ewan McGregor Vault". Just search "Kavanagh Q.C. Nothing But the Truth with Ewan McGregor". If you want to watch the full series, all episodes are also uploaded for free on a YouTube playlist through the channel "o p i u m 1". Just search "Kavanagh Qc".

Conclusion: "Nothing but the Truth" is a hidden gem in Ewan McGregor's career. Unlike other crime shows I've seen, this movie was unique in that there wasn't very much information the audience had that the characters didn't. You really have to pay attention, trust your gut, and hope the verdict is the right one. This also makes the movie great for rewatches because you'll start to notice things in the background that add to the story. I highly suggest watching this with another person because if you're like me, you're going to have a lot to talk about as the truth is revealed.

2. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Shallow Grave (1994)

To celebrate Ewan McGregor's 53rd birthday I think it's only fitting to review his movie debut!

First, a couple fun facts about this movie. Shallow Grave will turn 30 years old on May 16th this year! 😱Also, this movie was released 10 days after Being Human which was our first review and had Ewan's first big screen role.

Alright, let's dive in!

Movie Review: Shallow Grave is a Drama/Thriller directed by Danny Boyle and also written by him and John Hodge. This was a movie of firsts. It marked Danny Boyle's debut as a feature film director, John Hodge's first screenplay, Ewan's big screen debut, and the beginning of a close working relationship between the three men. The reason I'm calling this movie Ewan's debut even though he was in a movie before this is because he was just an extra in that movie. In this one, he plays a leading role. The movie also stars Kerry Fox and Christopher Eccleston. Shallow Grave is about three friends living together who come across a large sum of money when their new housemate mysteriously dies. In deciding to keep the money, they have to outwit the police investigating the death, protect the money from others looking for it, and eventually, protect themselves from each other. The protagonists are all assholes which makes for a unique viewing experience because you're not necessarily rooting for them to win. This movie is vulgar, violent, and has lots of blood. There's a couple frontal nude shots and for those that like Christopher Eccleston, an ass shot. You also get to see Ewan in drag which is a plus in my book. Unfortunately, I think there's a brief depiction of blackface (not by Ewan) which shocked and greatly disappointed me. It's a blink and you'll miss it moment but let me know if you see it or if my eyes are playing tricks on me.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Alex Law. Like the other characters he is a grade A asshole and majored in sarcasm. Damn if he's not pretty though. His character is integral to the plot this time. Ewan does a phenomenal job playing Alex and I think the casting directors knew what they were doing because his good looks definitely help you forgive his more rough personality.

Screentime Percentage (All numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan has a grand total of 41/93 minutes making his SP 44%. If that still sounds low to you, keep in mind that his previous role was an abysmal 2%. Trust me when I say that when you watch the movie for yourself it will feel like he's in every scene because he's so connected to the plot.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is Shallow Grave worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes yes yes! From the fantastic haircut, the super 90s outfits, the underwear shots, the drag, the post fight scene, and more! There is enough Ewan content to satisfy your soul. Is the movie worth watching in general? Another resounding YES! You can easily classify this movie as a Psychological/Thriller. I've watched it several times and find something new while also being left with more questions.

Where to Watch: Shallow Grave is currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the account "deejay bains". Just search "Shallow Grave 1994".

Conclusion: Shallow Grave is a passion project made by some plucky nobodies without a clue that it would start their careers down the path of success. It's charming, gripping, and has some good comedic moments. I would encourage you to watch this movie with friends. It's a fun time and will have you on the edge of your seat.

Twins?

Movie: The Island (2005)

Character: Lincoln Six Echo

Oneshot/Ficlet

Word Count: 382

Synopsis: Lincoln Six Echo encounters twins for the first time.

A/N: I am thinking about making a collection of oneshots for this character centered around his first experiences in the real world. Maybe call it “Firsts” or something. I also want to challenge myself to write a fic once a week so that I can improve my writing.

Lincoln Six Echo was taking a morning stroll on his local park’s walking path. His best friend, Jordan Two Delta, was still asleep when he left the house. Although they normally did everything together, he loved how peaceful she looked while sleeping and didn't want to wake her. He breathed in the fresh morning air and smiled at the joggers that passed him by. At the Institute, the clones participated in daily morning exercises. The harsh overhead lights and frigid air conditioning of the Institute could never compare to the soft glow of the rising sun and the cool gentle breeze of the outside world.

He then saw a woman walking towards him and pushing two large connected chairs with wheels. A "stroller" he remembered learning from Jordan Two Delta who loved talking to mothers at the park. Each chair seated a young child and as the woman drew closer, he noticed the children were dressed in matching outfits. Oh, Jordan is going to love hearing about this! He smiled at the woman and then realized that the children weren't just dressed the same, they looked exactly the same!

"I have never seen a clone this young at the Institute before. And the Institute was destroyed weeks ago, so where did she get a clone?" Lincoln wondered.

The woman smiled back at Lincoln and he stopped her before she passed him.

“Excuse me, ma’am! Your-your child has a clone. How is that possible?”

The woman looked dumbfounded at Lincoln, then at her children, then back at Lincoln before bursting into laughter. “You know what?” She laughed, “I've never heard twins called clones before but I guess they technically are! I'm going to start saying that just to mess with people. You have a good day, sir! And with that, she continued on her way.

Lincoln was just as confused as he was before but he didn't want to chase the lady down for answers. "Twins, she said. Is a twin like a clone but not a clone? What is the difference?" Lincoln pondered. If only McCord was still alive. He always had the answer. Maybe Jordan could help him understand.

"The more I learn about this world the stranger it seems." He thought. Lincoln shook his head and started back home.

12. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: A Life Less Ordinary (1997)

This is Ewan's last movie of 1997 and oh boy, is it a good one! And yes, the plot is just as zany as his previous two movies lol. Here are some fun facts before we begin!

Ewan's wife, Eve Mavrakis, is credited as Art Department Associate.

Once again the terrific trio of Danny Boyle, John Hodge, and Andrew Macdonald are reunited with Ewan to create movie magic! Sadly, Ewan and Danny's friendship took a huge blow after this project. The grudge would last for nearly two DECADES before they worked together again.

Stanley Tucci plays a minor role in the movie and will work with Ewan again in the future.

Genre: Comedy/Romance

Rating: R

Director: Danny Boyle

Starring: Cameron Diaz, Ewan McGregor

Synopsis: Robert Lewis is experiencing the worst day of his life. He gets fired, dumped, and evicted all within twenty-four hours! He decides his only option is to speak to the CEO and demand his job back. Instead, he ends up kidnapping the man's daughter, Celine! In the midst of this chaos, two angels are sent from Heaven to help Robert and Celine fall in love.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Robert Lewis. Robert is a hopeless romantic and aspiring writer. He's a sweet guy who doesn't know how he ended up as a wanted criminal but thinks he's gone too far to turn back. Thankfully for him, there's one person who's willing to help him be a convincing kidnapper and get the ransom money he needs...his kidnappee, Celine! Ewan gives a great performance in this role. His chemistry with Cameron Diaz is even better than his with Nicole Kidman for "Moulin Rouge!" in my opinion. He has two kiss scenes and a shirtless scene. He performs a song and dance number which is really fun. He wears the kilt which to my knowledge is the only time he's done so on screen to date. Robert is more innocent compared to Celine so that brings about some cute moments of confusion. Best of all, he sobs like a baby in one scene and it was *chef's kiss 🤌*. He needs to do more comedy roles because he's genuinely good at it! All the actors had great chemistry and gave stellar performances.

Screentime Percentage: Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 53/104 minutes making his SP 51%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan alone? Yes! I'm a fan of his raspy screaming voice (and he does a lot of it), he sings, dances, and seeing him cry in fear is always appreciated. Is the movie worth watching in general? Also yes! It's funny and the actors play off each other so well. The story is unique and the soundtrack is great too!

Warning before Watching: There are some bloody scenes in the movie. Nothing super graphic but I still want to issue a warning for those who are uncomfortable by such depictions. Two characters get shot in the head and there's a close up of their wounds. There's a scene of a character intentionally cutting them self and drawing a large amount of blood. Lastly, a character is cut by someone else and there's a close up of the wound.

Where to Watch: "A Life Less Ordinary" is currently available for rent on Fandango at Home. You can also watch on Amazon Prime Video if you have a premium subscription or you can pirate it on soap2day.

Closing Thoughts: It truly sucks that this movie wasn't well-received and was commercially unsuccessful. We need more movies like this that a take chance on a wacky story! I call them "silly goofy movies" and they are sorely lacking in Hollywood today. I implore you to give this movie a watch. It's a great time!

New Venture!

For those that care, I'm pressing pause on writing fics for now. I already haven't been writing regularly due to changes in my personal life. I still might drop some here and there though. That brings me to a new idea I've been brainstorming: reviewing Ewan McGregor movies!

Now you might be thinking that's not very original and you'd be correct. @palfriendpatine66 has reviews of some of Ewan's movies and you should check them out! However, I want to do something slightly different. A friend of mine jokingly mentioned they wished that there was a way to see how much screentime Ewan was in so they could decide if the movie was worth their time. I've also seen this sentiment shared a few times here on Tumblr. So I thought it'd be fun to go through his filmography and tally the minutes of screentime myself!

Here's the plan. I will be reviewing movies and TV movies starting with his first role and working towards the present or for however long I stay invested. Cameos and guest appearances will be excluded. Also excluded are TV shows and documentaries. So Halston, the Long Way series, and such won't be reviewed here. The movie reviews will include a tally at the end of how many minutes of screentime Ewan was in compared to how long the movie was. That number will then be converted to a percentage. Example: Ewan had 30/60 minutes of screentime. His screentime percentage is 50%.

I'm very excited and would love to hear y'all's thoughts on the idea!