......i-i...i Got Nothing

......i-i...i got nothing

Zeus: Oh shit, I killed my pregnant lover

Zeus, peering in the mess: Huh, what's that thing?

*looks at a lump of flesh with half formed face*

Zeus: Is-was that my son?

*lump of flesh stirs*

Zeus: Yay, he's alive!

Zeus, thinking about Hera: Oh shit, he's alive

Zeus: Well, I can hide him!

Zeus: In my thigh!

*later*

Hera, suspicious: Why does your thigh look so...big?

Zeus, sweating nervously: Well, I look fabulous don't I?

*strikes a pose*

Sometime in the future,

Hera: Why are you drinking 'Nutritional food for to-be mothers'?

Zeus: I-uh

.

.

Artemis: *looking at them * ...dumbasses

Apollo: Why is that syringe filled with glitter?

Asclepius: Anaesthetic!

Apollo:

...

..

.

Yeah thats true

People who had a mythology phase as a kid— you’re either queer, neurodivergent, mentally ill, or all three now

sorry I don’t make the rules

Thank you fren!!!!! *Shoves brownies into her mouth *

Dear all my mutuals,

Are we friends?

Can I text you random shit?

Can I ask if you're having a good day?

I want more friends

I want all the fren

That's it

I'm baking you all brownies

*sits on table with brownies, chocolate chip cookies, and icecream*

*makes gajar ka halwa, besan laddoo, rava laddoo, and pazhampori for homesick peeps*

*waits angrily for people to show up*

@anialogies @sarostudies @holding-infinity-and-a-book @shadow-sunk @teenageshizz @do-gay-dont-be-crime @black-like-my-soul

.... *Shudders *

The Olympian gals return to see Olympus in flames.

Hera: W-what happened?

Hades, sitting outside, seemingly rethinking his life choices: We were going to surprise you guys by decorating Olympus for women's Day. Zeus suggested lining the path to the banquet with candles would be good...

Hades: Apollo and Dionysus couldn't have picked a worse day to wear bell bottoms.

YES.