Secondhand

secondhand

She herself had nothing in particular about her that would make her subject to verbal or physical abuse. She herself was born with nothing in particular about her that would make someone dislike themselves. She watched the life around her like a movie, never feeling truly involved, but that fact not bothering her in the slightest. The only thing that kept her connected to this world was her wild and bucking emotion. Sometimes her best friend would go to her for advice, but not because she knew anything about what was happening to them. They would go to her because they knew that she knew about feelings. They were bad at feelings. So she felt for the both of them. She would tell them whatever she felt about what they were feeling. She never knew if she was helping. She liked to think so. And she felt very deeply about them and these problems that were so important to them. She found that it was important to her as well. She found that helping them out with their baggage helped her sort out her own life, even if she never went to anyone else with questions. And along the line, she started to wonder if she was so comfortable with giving all of this advice because she was similar feelings. But that didn’t make sense, she would know. She knows about feelings. But that one thought made her think, maybe she really didn’t know that much at all.

no longer

Our whole lives color coded: clothes and toys. Pinks, blues: our personality defined. We were not given our own ways to find, accepting, brainwashed, that boys will be boys, all full of violence, assaulting noise, and girls will be their perfect pets divine, discreetly bred to be domestic, kind, conditioned to submit, to watch with poise.  

Awaking from our blindness, bit by bit we are uninstalling unjust lessons. Exploring, we inspect and question it, no longer puzzle pieces forcing fit. We wonder if we are just daughters, sons because no longer do we idly sit.

where i am

it is dark, but the grey-orange glow of the city bounces off of the clouds and seeps through the window. i can hear rain, and the occasional whisper of distant thunder or a car’s tires on the street outside. the couch is too hot, but it is soft.

i am the only one. i wish i could bring you here, but you are far away, aren’t you?

pass the happy!! when you get this, reply with 5 things that make you happy and send this to the last 10 people in your notifications!! 💖❤️

1. My friends!2. My dogs!3. My hometown4. Validation lol5. HugsThank you for the happy!

circle of sky

here, the sky doesn’t go on forever. it stays draped between the trees. it stays just overhead and just out of reach. it’s private and constant. it’s ever-changing and perfectly familiar.

here, the sky is a personal thing. here, the sky is separate from everything else. here, the sky has it’s own place.

it fits in well with my fantasy, this piece of sky, deep purple, dotted acrylic stars peeking out behind lazy watercolor clouds, the moon’s iridescence lighting up the small world around me.

this piece of sky isn’t much

but it’s mine

don’t mind me

Don’t mind me Just keep doing what you’re doing Don’t mind me I’m just here to see the view Don’t mind me Just keep living how you’re living and maybe someday I can learn how to live like you do.

Don’t mind me Just keep smiling like you’re smiling Don’t mind me I’m just here to sing these blues Don’t mind me Just keep laughing like you’re laughing and maybe someday I can learn how to laugh like you do

Don’t mind me I’ve a fondness for exploring Don’t mind me Yeah this happens all the time Don’t mind me I just wanna see your beauty I wanna see a soul being kind