Nerdyparker616 - Kei

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modern au → jewish starks (based on x) liev schreiber as eddard stark isla fisher as catelyn stark alden ehrenreich as robb stark ezra miller as jon snow maude apatow as sansa stark odeya rush as arya stark logan lerman as bran stark max burkholder as rickon stark

Terrible Fic Idea #70: Game of Thrones, but make it time travel

I have a terrible weakness for time travel stories - especially when it leads to massive sprawling changes from the moment of divergence. So I thought to myself: which character would be able to most change Westeros through the simple act of time travel?

The answer came easily. Or: What if Ned Stark time traveled from after his death to the middle of Robert's Rebellion?

Just imagine it:

Ned Stark dies in the OT as per canon. He watches the events of canon unfold fold from the afterlife and has a crisis of faith.

For here is a man who has been nothing but an honorable, faithful, just lord. He served his realm in the best manner he could, was a dutiful husband and loving father, and put the good of others above personal advancement or that of his family. He even stained his honor to raise his sister's son as his own and give the boy the best protection he could - and yet.

And yet the gods allowed his son, wife, gooddaughter, and unborn grandchild to be murdered at a wedding. They allowed his oldest daughter to be used and abused by those that should have protected her. They let that thing take over his second son's body-

So when Ned finds a means to return from the afterlife or is allowed the chance tor return and fix things, the Ned who arrives on the morning of the Sack is a very different man than the one who went to bed the night before. Though they are the same at heart, Ned no longer believes or trusts everyone around him to be good, honorable, or want the best for Westeros.

In the New Timeline, Ned tries to prevent the deaths of Elia and her children - he's too late to save Aegon and Rhaenys, kills Gregor Clegane as he tries to force the princess, and though Elia is alive when he finds her, she dies of her wounds soon after - and gets Jamie to give up the Wildfire Plot after murdering the Mad King.

The fight he has with Robert for refusing to condemn the royal family's deaths is even worse than the OT and threatens to bring down the Red Keep.

Afterwards, he races to Lyanna's side... but though he arrives a week earlier than canon, he's still forced to fight his way through her protectors and she still dies in childbed. He does have enough time with her to get her side of the story - that she loved Rhaegar until he went to war to keep her, and has been a prisoner in the tower ever since she said she wanted to go home - and say his goodbyes.

He returns to Winterfell a little more mindful of his wife's feelings - Ned still passes Jon off as his son, but makes it clear that he has no intention of shaming her again, while also making it clear that the North would shame him if he sent Jon to be raised elsewhere - and sets about strengthening the North.

The next few years should be a montage of Ned making alliances and enriching his kingdom: 1) He talks Benjen out of joining the Night's Watch, sends him to survey all the empty keeps in the North, and grants him Queenscrown once the coffers have had a chance to refill after the war; 2) He gets White Harbor and Bear Island to start trading lumber and peat up and down their respective coasts and across the Narrow Sea, which enriches the North; 3) When Catelyn announces her second pregnancy, he starts work on restoring Moat Cailin, claiming that their second son will need a seat someday; 4) He finds some excuse, if not to get rid of the Boltons, than at least keep such an eye on them its next to impossible for them to continue as they have; and 5) Making tentative moves to court the other Great Houses. Doran Martell, grateful he at least tried to save his sister, arranges a betrothal between Arya and Trystane? Sansa gets a fostering in Highgarden? Bran is sent to foster at Storm's End?

Regardless, the North should be in a better position when Robert rides north after Jon Arryn's death - by natural causes this time, Ned having shared with his foster father stories Catelyn told him about Littlefinger's obsession with the Tully girls.

Meanwhile, Ned also tries to do a better job with Jon this time around - make it more clear that he is loved and valued, and that a good post or even a holdfast will be granted to him if he earns it. Ned does not want to place him on the Iron Throne, but it becomes increasingly clear as time goes on that war of some kind will inevitably follow Robert's death and so it's best all his children be prepared.

(Sansa and even Catelyn are taught how to use a knife to protect themselves, Ned honestly claiming he wants what happened to his sister never to happen to another woman in their family.)

King Robert rides north, gets a stiff, "No," for both his propositions - and might actually have come to blows if Ned hadn't arranged for Jamie and Cersei to be discovered in flagrante delicto in the First Keep. Robert rides back south sans a wife and heirs, short one Hand and Kingsguard. Cersei is beheaded, Jamie and Joffrey are sent to take the Black, and Myrcella and Tommen are left to be fostered at Winterfell until they're old enough to have other arrangements made.

Tywin is naturally unhappy about this turn of events and rises up in rebellion. The Iron Islands use this as an excuse to start reaving again, while the Reach withholds their support unless Robert promises to marry Margery - and Dorne merely withholds support.

Almost three years into the conflict, news arrives during the wedding of Robb Stark and Alys Karstark that King Robert died in battle without any heirs. His brothers have gone to war over which of them should succeed Robert to the Iron Throne. Tywin continues to claim that his grandson Tommen, safe in Winterfell, is the rightful heir. Baelon Greyjoy has declared himself King of the Iron Islands... and there are rumors of Daenerys Stormborn gathering forces in Essos for an invasion.

Into this Ned - having realized it was the best choice he could make for the safety and security of his family and the North - declares that Jon is really the trueborn son of his sister Lyanna and her husband Rhaegar Targaryen... and as such has rightfully been Jaehaerys III since birth.

The war which follows is swifter and less devastating than the OT War of Five Kings, but is still war. By largely staying out of the fight between Tywin and Robert, the North has a large army of fresh soldiers and, by marriage, the support of the Vale and the Riverlands. Stannis has Renly assassinated via shadow, but few chose to follow a follower of the Red God. The Stormlands end up throwing their lot in with Jon, as do Dorne and the Reach once they see which way the wind is blowing.

In a situation that should very much echo the situation in the British Isles in 1066, Jon's forces should be in the southeast of Westeros preparing for Dany's invasion when word comes of Tywin leading his forces north to capture Winterfell. Royalist forces should race across the countryside, win a magnificent victory at the Twins, and still be celebrating their success when news arrives of Essosi troops landing in the Crownlands. Jaehaerys' exhausted forces race back across the country... and manage to win the first engagement by the skin of their teeth.

When Dany brings her dragons to bear in the next battle, Rhaegal defects to the other side - and rather than pursue another Dance of Dragons, aunt and nephew come to an arrangement.

A Great Council is called. Jon is elected Lord of the Seven Kingdoms by overwhelming numbers. Sansa is his queen. Dany is named Lady of the Rock after most the remaining Lannisters are exiled or take the Black.

Bonuses include: 1) OT trauma for Ned, who never quite moves past what happened to his family then; 2) Dark horse romance between Jon and Sansa, fueled at first by the comment that Ned would like his daughters to marry good men - like Robb or Jon - and Catelyn encouraging it once she learns Jon is really her husband's nephew; and 3) No one ever learning Ned traveled through time.

And that is legit all the space I have. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you do anything with it.

More Terrible Fic Ideas

au in which robert, the starks and the lannisters play monopoly instead of going hunting and pushing each other‘s kids from towers.

tyrion implements a tax system to make things more interesting and fights cersei over the cat for a solid ten minutes.

around thirty minutes into the game, catelyn realizes that she has free will and stops paying taxes.

arya and sansa haggle over new york avenue, which ends up being bought by theon. this causes the two to completely cast aside their differences, ally and subsequently start doing everything in their power to make theon‘s life hell.

theon himself is quite severely stoned the entire time throughout.

ned enters horrendous debt pretty much immediately and, after two hours of being financially sucked dry by both cersei and his tax evader of a wife, decides to just place his figurine in jail and never leave.

jon, playing the dog, controls the railroads and makes jaime, playing the ship, go completely broke within minutes. being beaten by a bastard and officially the first to lose the game makes jaime so mad he spends the rest of the evening perched on the family‘s ancestral armchair eating flaming hot cheetos and stifling sobs.

cersei is holding onto her last two dollars and her one house in atlantic avenue like a maniac and evades taxes like it‘s an olympic sport. she claims ownership of kentucky avenue on the grounds that red is her house‘s color at least twice. after three hours, she‘s consumed enough vintage red to kill a large mammal and keeps quoting the art of war. fascinatingly enough, she never goes completely broke.

robert, just as broke and drunk as his wife but not nearly as ferocious, proposes marriage for tax advantages to bran, who is in possession of the boardwalk and lets him dangle on his proposition for two rounds before accepting and feeling like a benevolent god.

sansa sees this and immediately proposes to arya, who accepts, only for them to be sued by their mother for public indecency („you‘re siblings, jesus christ!“). arya argues that this is just a game and that one could argue that robert‘s and bran‘s marital alliance is just as if not even more inappropriate, considering that bran is seven and robert thirtyseven. sansa countersues her mother for tax evasion, who promises she‘ll drop her lawsuit if her daughters let her keep hoarding perverse amounts of wealth. „love wins!“ arya says, which causes jaime, still perched on the armchair but now eating old nan‘s home made whiskey truffles, to hysterically sob. cersei stares him down.

robb, in a rare moment of almost prophetic foresight, excuses himself one hour in and goes on a very, VERY long walk with grey wind.

tyrion, whose tax system has spectacularly backfired in his face, proposes marriage to catelyn, jon and cersei in rapid succession, who all turn him down. „i wish i was the monster you think i am. i wish i had enough poison for the whole pack of you. i would gladly give my life to watch you all swallow it.“ he screams before he leaves the table.

at that, joffrey, who has refused to participate and instead sits on the couch playing doom on his nintendo ds, starts hysterically laughing. tyrion turns on his heel and awards his nephew with the bitchslap of the century. this causes cersei to completely abandon the game and chase after him with a broom. catelyn makes sure that everyone is distracted by the lannister antics and then reaches across the table and bags cersei‘s money and properties.

with a heavy heart, myrcella trades arya and sansa one of her limited edition bayala schleich unicorns for park place.

at this point, the game is between the tycoons that are catelyn and jon, the bran-robert alliance, the arya-sansa-alliance, and ned, who is still in jail and watching ice hockey on his phone under the table. that is when catelyn hears rickon gagging and discovers that he, in the absence of tyrion, the self declared bank manager, has managed to eat all bank notes from the box.

rickon gets his stomach pumped, cersei and tyrion have both been arrested, theon is still stoned, arya, sansa and myrcella have wandered off to go play schleich horses, and jon remains at the table, alone, content, and quietly considering himself the winner.

Jon Snow Appreciation Month Day 14 - Arya Stark

— war of the foxes: "portrait of fryderyk in shifting light"; richard siken

happy birthday @userdanewhitman