Reblogging Because I Just Really Like How Ridge Turned Out:)

Reblogging because I just really like how Ridge turned out:)

My reaper man Ridge!

This was just a quick sketch I did last night. Maybe one day I’ll make it into a bigger piece but I just really liked how he turned out.:)

Well, how is he?

I know it’s not a viral number and mostly just piddly numbers. But the fact that there was 103 hits on my story is phenomenally blowing me away. This started out as a funny joke to write but then I did enjoy the story. Even though it’s a fanfic, it was just fun to write.

Even thought I don’t post a lot of my WIPs or projects because I have fears™️, when I do actually put something out even the smallest numbers make me feel warm and fuzzy inside, a soft fuzzy man am I.

I don’t usually care about the likes and reblogs so if you do any of those great but I’m not gonna beg or force anyone to do so. It would just make my day if anyone just skimmed through any of my profiles just to look around.

I wanna say a huge ass THANK YOU to everyone that does and who has read any of my stories on my ao3. You all are the best and make my world better each time you do.❤️

(Also ignore the part about it being a part of a bigger series. I fucked up there lol)

I originally wanted to do this design with puffy paint, but with how the cover of the sketchbook is it tore right off when it was dry. So I used some papier-mâché to cover up the puffy paint and painted over it:)

I like how this one came out much better lol.

Reblogging because tomorrow it be Halloween 🎃

I actually really liked this movie lol sorry I’m late lol

Today I feel the need to post this somewhere that isn’t my deviantart.

I don’t like to post about my personal life and I am just one of many out there, but today, I want to just lay it down.

I don’t like to talk about my personal life because I have a fear of the repercussions it may lead to and what I might cause to myself and the others around me.

Earlier this year I started going to a therapist and he helped a lot, bless him, but I haven’t gone back since due to some other major life changing events I do not wish to dwell on. My therapist helped me realize that a lot of my anger and anxiety, which the latter of the two being through the roof, was caused by my upbringing. In other words, my inability to contain my emotions and how to deal with a sticky situation was not taught well to me as a child.

Then, on top of that and unfortunately many years of my life later, I came to fully realize that someone very close to me was, in short, a gaslighting narcissist. This person put so much strain on me growing up that I didn’t realize it. When I would sense something wasn’t really right, or my words would get twisted by this person but I was unable to do anything about it, I thought it was normal to feel as I felt.

I grew up walking on eggshells, and still do, and fearing of upsetting them. I can’t even begin to list all the things they do and have done to me nor do I think I feel comfortable doing so. Since going to therapy and realizing all my anger, anxiety, depression, zoning out, on top of many other issues, we’re caused by a lot in my past I feel like I really want to try and push forward.

I say this but I know darn well I probably won’t. However, I do, at this moment, have a sense of at least wanting to move forward. I would like to work on my projects again and really focus on the things that give me a little spark of serotonin. For the past five years I have spent procrastinating and depressed and in slow motion due to my home circumstances. I hate putting the blame all on this person- even if it was mostly them.

I do want to look forward to organizing and encouraging myself to work, but I feel like everything almost does not ever go according to my plans. So I say again, I want to look forward to start a new chapter, but we’ll see how that goes.

Can’t have too much of a good thing, you know?